Raphael Awen

Feeling What You REALLY Want And Need During These Turbulent Times

Published on March 14, 2020March 19, 2020 by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

by Raphael Awen

When the rumble of the collective fear of death goes viral through the collective by the aid of a media-hyped and created event, we do well to feel each and every part of us that resonates with that rumble.

Trying instead to stay ‘high-vibe and positive’ invariably proves to be an exercise in denial and lying to oneself and others if we are not willing to be honest about the parts of us that actually are freaked out if they in fact are. You can’t stay high-vibe if you aren’t there already, and you can’t get to high-vibe if you’ve denied yourself a way to feel the parts of you who are low-vibe at the moment.

You were given a range of vibes for a divine creator reason and as a divine creator. That reason becomes very obscured and flattened when you are only permitting one polarity to live in you. What good is a piano with only the high notes?

What this Coronavirus actually is in terms of any real threat and in what scale is something that will only be known in hindsight. What is real is the fear that you feel that is kicked up by the story that is being spread far and wide. Our collective is so long overdue for a collective bowel movement and this one may well be one big dump, one that relieves so much. We’ve all had a hand in creating this need.

Because we are all one in a higher level of reality, we also do well to feel what this collective shift in consciousness is opportuning us to feel personally.

When I feel parts of myself, I feel aspects of me that want the future to be safe and bright and exciting and alive. I feel the parts of me that want purpose and engagement, as well as creature comforts. All of these goodies are threatened by the looming Coronavirus story – asking me to pare down my desires and settle for the story of the goal of survival. I feel the parts of me that aren’t yet assured of a bright and exciting future and wonder if we shouldn’t just settle for an outlook of mitigating disaster rather than full-on thrival.
Now grounded in what’s real in the inside, I get to actually process and create movement inside of myself from fear to love. I couldn’t actually get to the love were it not for the fear as my starting place.

And I also can’t get to the love I’m needing when I’m spending all my time staying up on the agenda of the Dark Illuminati/Cabal/Black Hats versus the Alliance/Q-anon picture of things as a way to distract myself from what’s really going on inside of me to me.

And when I don’t actually get to the love I’m needing and wanting, my vibe is invariably lower, I’m broadcasting that vibe as a reality generator to those around me before I utter a word or take an action. In other words, your and my greatest service to others begins and ends with the greatest service to self. ‘Selfishness’ isn’t a bad word at all in 5D.

Whoever gave us the ‘service to self’ versus ‘service to other’ dichotomy was still living in the reality that there is actually any separation between self and other. This is the old picture of separation of spirit and matter, the separation of good and evil, the battle for supremacy that is being found more and more to be the root of all conflict inside and outside. There isn’t actually a ‘whoever’ to blame here; we gave that picture to ourselves as a way to live our way to and through a movement of our reality.

We are this big, and our lessons are this epic! We get to do this and we get to do it as a collective and as individuals at the same time.

Allow what you really want, feel, and need, without denial, to guide you through these waters.

I’d be delighted to help you through your personal rumbles if what I’m sharing resonates for you. More here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Photo courtesy of https://unsplash.com/@renebbernal

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc.

Welcoming The Peaks And Valleys Of Awakening

Published on March 9, 2020March 14, 2020 by Raphael Awen2 Comments

by Raphael Awen

You can have what you want. That’s not actually the question.

The bigger question is about being ready to have what you want.

A part of you may readily say ‘oh, believe me, I’m ready! I’m so ready, I’m getting both depressed and impatient waiting to have what I really want.’

But this is only taking into consideration one part of you. Other parts of you can be just off your radar and actively resisting you (or what we call ‘you’) as they are not interested at all in these big changes ‘you’ feel you are so ready for. This resistive part of you is not something you can control, but it is something that you are responsible for, and something that you need to become responsive to.

Then, there is also another aspect of you, that is probably also just off your radar and that is your higher self. Your higher self may have chosen a preferred path of difficulty and going without something that another part of you deeply desires in order to learn and grow through a difficulty. It wouldn’t actually be a growth crucible without this tension between what ‘you’ want and don’t want. Your higher self is also something you cannot control, but it is something you are responsible for and that you also need to become more responsive to.

You are not a victim. Your life as you know it now is shaped by you, and the life you will come to know in the future is also shaped by you.

Your life as it is right now, warts and all, is perfect in the midst of imperfection. You are perfect while growing and learning. All the angst, pain and confusion is sacred. You had so much heaven that you needed to dial up hell in order to grow. Your soul loved the heaven it knew, but it also wanted more, and it knew the path to more was though the tension of less.

Consciously letting go of reaching for peak experiences and instead welcoming your awaiting valley experiences is what your soul may be asking of you. You may have very much needed your awakening experiences that happened through the peak experiences to let you know what is possible and what awaits you. But now, your soul wants you to let go of what a part of you may be be in danger of becoming quite addicted to, in order now to more consciously connect to what you actually came here for.

Whether conscious or not, you can’t escape growth. Growth is built into the DNA of the universe that you are a part of. While you can’t escape growth, you can accept your awakening to what is, and even the need to mourn the loss of your deep night’s rest in the 3D fusion of unconsciousness.

Now, as you are awakening, you are offered a conscious choice that your path up, is a path down. The downward path is a matter of feeling all there is to feel that you were not able to feel while asleep in 3D consciousness.

This will involve feeling crappy on a regular basis for a good amount of time. If this isn’t an option for ‘you’, then you are not yet ready for this deeper more conscious path of healing, but you can be assured, all of us will be invited and re-invited to return here just as soon and we are ready to. It is what we came here for. We came here to ascend with all of us, without any ‘lesser’ parts of us left behind being punished for any insubordination, or for just not getting the program.

Time now to look at what we’ve called ‘spiritual practices’ to feel where they are actually about transcending in the name of ascending, where they are about not feeling, rather than true healing.

We all come eventually to having what we most deeply want, with the fullest and deepest bliss that we can’t quite imagine. We are living our way to being able to imagine it as we feel and heal the parts of us still in deep pain that were covered over with our positive spirituality agendas.

Time now for a negative spirituality agenda that sees it all as sacred.

Raphael Awen

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc.

The Beloved

Published on February 14, 2020February 22, 2020 by Raphael Awen1 Comment

By Raphael Awen

The Beloved

What prepares you for being able to bear the beloved, is bearing the longing for the beloved. Belonging is one with being in longing, that starts from you to you, and only then provides the courage to risk all going in with a beloved, for only now, do you now possess the necessary safety of something you can never lose.

What enables you to dance with the beloved, is the dance with your own heart and soul. What drew you together is sure to undergo great and fearful change. How you relate with those changes is a mirror of what’s currently true in your deepest core of knowing and feeling.

What draws your beloved to you, is the magnet of your own inner tended garden radiating through all time and space. Fearing he or she will never come is only answered by continually preparing your heart chamber and making space, like breathing, in the even greater fearful awareness that he or she is most surely approaching, everyday closer, if you’ve set this intention.

What endures and can never be lost is love, for all is love and even that which is seemingly not love, came from love, in order to magnify itself. Your journey is always and ever the greatest story of love ever told, nothing more, nothing less. We all needed to be so deep and buried in the story; so lost and ‘in-character’ role playing, so that we could ‘event’ually awaken from the charade of our character in order to return back to the charisma at the core of all universes and cells and atoms alike.

We are all being invited to bear the longing of the beloved, and to expand our capacity to know and feel love, which is never to be satisfied for long, and is sure to kill as much as it is to enliven.

I write these words in my attempt to assist you in some way to be with the longing that lives in your heart, and for myself, to be with the ever expanding longing and joys that belonging with with my beloved, moves in me.

Happy and joy filled Valentine’s Day to all beloveds, the beloved Divine, beloveds in love, beloveds in waiting, and to ‘the one’ I am delighted to call ‘mine’ – Jelelle Awen

Xo😍❤️

Raphael

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our Patreon Page to send us love in the form of money: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart 🙂

Meeting Your Inner Orphan

Published on February 4, 2020February 15, 2020 by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

Photo courtesy of https://unsplash.com/@benwhitephotography

By Raphael Awen

What we relate to as suffering, the Divine is passionately interested in. Divinity knew bliss, but had no sense of challenge or difficulty; and thus, no movement.

We feel something as deeply moving because that something flows in between the familiar tension we hold in our being of bliss and it’s loss.

We are the Divine out experiencing movement, growth, challenge and difficulty, all of which the Divine couldn’t know or feel were it not for its choice and our souls agreement to individuate itself into many gods – you and I.

Yes, you and I are saddled with godhood. And this explains our base tones of anxiety and fear. We knew and hold in our being remembrance of there being no separation, no veil of forgetting, no sense of any paradise lost.

This past week, I had a very moving encounter where I felt that it was time for me to formally meet my Inner Orphan Self – this core aspect of my soul who holds all of these tensions; this core aspect of my soul, out of which is born in this life, the Inner Child and Inner Teenager – both of whom are shaped and formed from the Inner Orphan soul aspect.

I simply tuned in Yeshua as a beloved guide, and dialed in a Golden Earth setting, and there in the magical outdoors, was Yeshua crouched down about 8 or 10 feet away, holding upright a (soon to be) eager toddler, who he then let go, as this beautiful baby focused his gaze on me and began to take his first steps crossing the space between us. Midway across, the name Bartholomew came as plain as day. I received him into my arms, and he readily received me. I intuitively knew that this Bartholomew would change my life, that holding him would require all the rigors of true parenthood and presence of being that this Orphan would need to transmute the pain in his heart, allowing both him and I to shift our destiny and to embody what we intended when we set out on our journey of ‘leaving’ the Divine.

This ache of loss held in the Inner Orphan soul aspect is the juice and the portal back to full embodiment, full familiarity, full familial fidelity. We long to return to soar in the heavens and so the Divine gives us the role of parent, re-parenting our own soul aspects as the very portal back to that which we lost only in experience, reassuring us that we never lost the actual possession or birthright of our full godhood.

In the days that followed this experience, I have surely felt a conscious vulnerability and arising of base fears and anxieties, along with deep tears – feeling so small. I have also felt a ‘me’ there who could handle and show up for all of it, as well as the Divine’s confidence in me and gratitude to me for my desire and willingness – that even now as I write these words, I feel a welling up of this support and energy.

I offer support and space holding and process within session space as a SoulFullHeart facilitator to others who wish to undertake such a journey, but it isn’t from any expert place of one who has ‘healed’ their anxiety and thus who has transcended their anxiety, or their depression, or their fear, but rather as one who has welcomed their fear, anxiety and depression. Quite the opposite, at many times, embracing this portal into pain has left parts of me seriously wondering if I hadn’t bit off more than I could chew. I can tell you that time and time again, I continue to come out the other side into newfound joy and range of being – what I see and feel as real transmutation of my being. This in turn only appetizes me for more and makes any ‘attainment’ look and feel like kindergarten all over again as I feel like a bigger beginner every time some ground or embodiment is gained.

Isn’t that what is really to be expected in an infinite love reality? Any and all progress measurement is swallowed up by love’s infinity. You get to be in infinite love if you’re willing to give up your stamp of certification of being anything other than part of this infinity. Certificates only look good on really boring office walls anyway. I’d so much rather know and feel real adventure out in the forest, the city and Golden Earth, with Yeshua, the Divine Mother, and The Divine Father.

Look for me and Bartholomew out and about feeling love and life anew in many ways for the first time. His name meaning is ‘Son of the Ploughman’ which so surprised me as I felt the plough as that which opens and prepares the earth to receive seed – it is through our wounding that the divine seed enters – ensuring that we will never lose our way – even through the deepest loss imaginable. We are ensured that all consciousness is finding its way back to all that it ever was and even being expanded out to more in the process.

That kind of starts to explain the hell you’ve journeyed through, or quite possibly feel like you are journeying through right now, yes? Doesn’t this speak also to the part of you who is more set on only ‘moving forward’ who doesn’t want to cry over spilt milk, who doesn’t want to get lost again in the world of feeling? This part of you will also need your showing up to negotiate the exploration and true healing journey your soul came here to undertake.

My truth is that we all individuated out of the Divine and came here to feel it all, even to get lost in it, so that we could be found by love, and in so doing, be truly of the greatest service to all of love and life.

Thank you for feeling me and for feeling yourself. 🙂💚😇

Much love,
Raphael Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.Com/sessions

Could It Be?

Published on January 27, 2020February 5, 2020 by Raphael Awen2 Comments

By Raphael Awen

Stewing in thoughts or feelings finds movement when there is a you there who is willing to begin to feel what is stewing and why with curiosity and compassion.

Emotion and feeling are two words that speak their truth. One speaks of motion and the other of touch, or contact. Motion and touch create a ‘to and from’. Without this to and from, there isn’t a flow, and we’re back to the stasis of the stewing; stuck in a prolonged suffering over our difficulties.

Our difficulties are difficult enough. Why would parts of us choose to stay in suffering over our difficulties, rather than feel what is wanting to be felt, and thus let in the movement?

Could it be that to parts of us, the known suffering is better than the unsafe unknown?

Could it be that to parts of us, they’ve never been accustomed to an other with an open heart? Could it be that parts of us have been so long conditioned to a world without feeling that the prospect of feeling is a distant memory of an unsafe reality, that needs to be resisted for the land mine experience it was?

How could you find out what is true now for parts of you and why? Are parts of you open to a new experience of ‘flow to and from’ of whatever it is that is wanting to be felt in your sacred world?

Are you and parts of you ready to let in the next stages of your own largesse of being by feeling the most contracted and small feeling parts of you?

If these words call to you, and you feel you would like some help, I offer a free intro call intro call to talk more with you about the process we offer. Message me if you are interested.

From 3D to 5D

Published on January 17, 2020 by Raphael Awen1 Comment

By Raphael Awen

In 3D, it’s ‘till death do us part’.

In 4D, it’s till the death of the bond do us part.

In 5D, it’s realizing that there isn’t actually any death or partings.

It’s okay to have parts of us still invested in 3D. They will be attached there until it’s safe and desirable for them to move to a higher frequency.

Movement occurs when you form a relationship with this part of you, differentiating yourself from the part, so that there can be a relationship of feeling what they are feeling as they are feeling it. It takes two to form a relationship. This is the embodiment of your Higher Self that parts of you readily warm up to, which in turn changes your life as you know it.

What is love and life asking you to feel now? Can you feel that as a part of you?

Raphael Awen

Our Individuation Anger At the Divine

Published on January 14, 2020 by Raphael Awen1 Comment

By Raphael Awen

Underneath all of our anxiety, depression; underneath all of our motivation and lack of motivation; in the bedrock of our lives and in the bedrock of our Metasoul can be found anger at God for individuating us out of itself.

‘The me who may have agreed to the whole plan doesn’t feel like the me who has to patiently endure the veil, the slow path to remembrance, and the boredom of something missing, something so deeply lost’ was the voice that came forward this week, followed quickly by another voice that said ‘but I can’t be angry at God! God is our only hope of return’.

I had quite a dam of tears break free right then, feeling compassion for the parts of me and my Metasoul feeling this bedrock underneath all the dramas of this life, especially as and triggered by new dramas that are wanting to unfold.

These past few weeks, I’ve been given to feeling the invitation to return to being in the moment; feeling how and when I’m not in the moment, etc. This awareness of this ‘soul fear/anger of individuation from the divine’ that I’m writing about today really speaks to why we avoid the moment. The moment contains this access to what’s real inside of us. Our Gatekeeper aspect of us has been convicted that we couldn’t handle this awareness, that feeling this fear would short circuit us or cause us to abandon our misssion, suicide (which as the gods we are is actually, a ‘deicide – killing god’).

Our conscious selves have lived in a kind of militaristic compartmentalized hierarchy world of only knowing what we need to know to do our part, while other ‘commander’ aspects of our being hold a vastly larger overview of our soul purpose, our mission, our origin and our destination. We are invited now as the time has come to bridge these compartments and to feel the larger reasons and realities for our being. This sheds much light on the persistent wounding patterns playing out in parts of us this life.

How do we do this?

I believe we do this most simply and most profoundly by simply being willing and humble to feel all there is to feel. The rest is built in – the timing, the pieces, the resources, the relationships that come and go, the life changes. Like the bodies autonomic function, we don’t need to concern ourselves with how to breathe or how to get our heart to function. It just does, providing we remain ‘opted in’ to life. Opting in to your emotional body is a choice that more and more people are awakening to. The healing that occurs from this willingness to feel never ceases to amaze me.

Much love,

Raphael Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.Com/sessions

Please check us out the link above if SoulFullHeart feels like a going on place for your healing journey. We have a free intro session available. Our website, YouTube channel and blog offers a ton of goods about this emotional body awakening that you can explore for free.

Photo yesterday of our first snowfall this winter.

Living Below Your Birthright

Published on January 3, 2020February 3, 2020 by Raphael Awen2 Comments

By Raphael Awen

Working for anything that is yours by birthright is a form of resistance to that thing, allowing a part of you to hide its resistance while appearing like it actually wants the pursued thing, usually to maintain social acceptance.

‘Working for a living’ for instance is one of the biggest examples of this and misnomers out there. Living doesn’t occur by virtue of working. Living occurs by virtue of your essence, by virtue of your being.

Your being receives life and gives back to life in a natural economy of gift exchange. If you shortchange life in this natural exchange, that is, giving something less than your best, your true gifts, what you came here to give, and settle for a ‘job that pays the bills’ instead, you can be sure that life will respond to you in kind with a reflection of your ingratitude for what you are given. This is not any kind of punishment from an angry God or angry universe, but simply an invitation into an awareness of what your own alchemy is producing. An invitation in your innate more which you already possess.

You already are a powerful alchemy that is producing exactly as it was designed to, even if you are, like me, still consciously wanting to change or alter this alchemy.

Already encoded into you is every last provision you will ever need to fulfill every last detail of what you came here to do. If you are experiencing a drama of lack moving through your story at the moment, this too, is a provision of an invitation into an initiation of this more that you already are. This is a big opportunity to feel and heal parts of you still encoded in lack, while being submerged in a super-abundant free-energy universe, inside of an even greater multiverse.

While there is nothing to work for, in this way of earning or qualifying for anything, there is however, your necessary reach for what you want and desire, as the universe cannot successfully provide anything you aren’t willing to want or choose. The circuitry cannot complete without your desire, choice, intention, and your action.

So what feels like the need to work as in earning something, is actually more about the necessary effort involved in claiming your essence. It will take ‘work’ for instance to slowly get to know and love the part of you conditioned and convinced to a ‘working for a living’ reality, to let in this new reality, but this is a self loving kind of work that is pure joy and creative play to be with. The opposite of drudgery. A gift that keeps on giving.

We all have a lot to learn in entering this new reality, but it feels so exciting to lean into it more and more. I’ll take me a big chunk of that for 2020!

You are the light of the world, even in your darkness, a city set on a hill that cannot be hidden. The universe aches for your arising.

Raphael Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.Com/sessions

Photo by me taken at our favorite park close by!

The Mutual Entanglement Of Victim And Perpetrator: Alive Daily Video Series | Raphael Awen

Published on December 28, 2019 by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

https://youtu.be/Ammxvb_qelU

By Raphael Awen

Today’s Live: ‘The Mutual Entanglement Of Victim And Perpetrator’

In this video, I explore how we can embrace real forgiveness without paving over the part of us that does feel victimized and traumatized.

Here is the full Alive Series Playlist: https://tinyurl.com/uaghll3

Info about the free Intro call to sessions with myself: https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Become a one-time or monthly donor and patron to support SoulFullHeart and our expression through videos, writings, and more! https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart

Raphael Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.Com/sessions

Tidings Of Comfort And Joy: Alive Daily Video Series | Raphael Awen

Published on December 25, 2019 by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

https://youtu.be/CndxlhYrdss

By Raphael Awen

💚 Tidings Of Comfort And Joy 💚

In today’s live, I share how each one of us are the promised Christ Child.

Can you feel how the Christmas Carols are actually about you?

Thank you for attending this little Christmas Party 🎄

Here is the full Alive Series Playlist: https://tinyurl.com/uaghll3

Info about the free Intro call to sessions with myself: https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Become a one-time or monthly donor and patron to support SoulFullHeart and our expression through videos, writings, and more! https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart

Raphael Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.Com/sessions

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