It All Comes Down To Letting IN

It all comes down to letting in. Letting in what wants to come to each of us when we are ready for it. When we can feel and love the parts of us that resist it so. Hard to believe that could be true! But when I sit with my selves and really tap into my heart I can feel and see the places where love and worth get stopped up. There is a so much in our soul’s merkaba that we are not totally conscious of that can create this block out of fear and unworth.

Kalayna and I are taking this all in during our anniversary time together. It is a gift to ourselves and our parts. It fuels the inner hearth so that we can offer the overflow back out into the collective through those that we serve both physically and virtually. We chose a path of actively collapsing timelines to re-emerge into a new one that lets in more trust, gratitude, love, and abundance in the name of service and ambassadorship. No longer will we accept anything less than what we feel we deserve and desire.

We are embarking on something new together but also with those that are on similar paths and trajectories. Our passion is to steward and bridge New Earth Now into our heart, body, and soul and serve that back out into the grids. Thank you all for being a part of this journey with us. We continue to offer the healing path that has given us so much in return. Much love to you from our soulful hearts to yours.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Feeling And Healing The System Within

The past couple of weeks has been sprinkled with interfacing with “The System”. The legal matrix that requires each of us to have our T’s crossed and our I’s dotted in order to go about our lives in a state of unencumbered “freedom”. There was a time where I felt myself to be a warrior out to slay the dragon of said System. I found myself on a mission to free myself and shine the light for others to do the same.

At the time it felt like my purpose. Energetically I felt myself in states of rage, fear, and anxiety. I would get pretzled into so many knots around what I could and couldn’t get away with in regards to taxes, travel, social expectations, and debt just to name a few. When I began my own journey of feeling myself as a hub of fractured selves, I could then see and feel a picture of this System inside of myself. There were multiple metasoul lives that were reacting to this feeling of imprisonment and control. It was happening from me to me first. The outer was just reflecting the inner.

At the core it comes to “I can’t have what I want”. Even underneath that is “I am not worthy to have what I want” so I create the matrix outside to validate the one on the inside. I have been getting guidance from a Reptilian aspect of mine that I have connecting with recently. He has been helping me to see how the matrix is energized and co-created within the collective. It starts with a whisper, a meme, that builds its strength on the wings of our fear and unworth. That which was created when we found ourselves separate from Source.

When we find ourselves in moments where we are in the belly or on the radar of this system, there is an internal reaction. An energetic frequency that builds upon the largess of the collective. It feeds it and helps to make manifest the very thing we are afraid of. As I have experienced in my own process, as well as this guidance from my reptilian aspect, it is the inner work of transforming our own fear places, our own control centers, our own inner matrix that begins the process of a wholesale transformation of a system that actually no longer exists on the outside.

If that is the case, then it becomes clear that we are the heroes that we have been looking for. We are the leaders that can take our selves to new places of freedom and joy that we could only previously dream of. A new layer of trust comes when we start to unanchor ourselves from the collective conscious paradigm we actually co-created. To fight the System is to really only continue the struggle within. Going IN and bringing love to all of your shadow places, including your inner Reptilian, is what helps clear a path to a new economy of gift, passion, and true personal empowerment.

I will be continuing this exploration in further writing and live streams as the arise.

What do you feel is preventing you from fully living the life that you can see and feel within?

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

A MANdate For New Earth Now

Last night my friend, heart shaman, and MANtor (mentor as a man) Raphael Awen and I enjoyed a night out together for the first time in a while. It was a time we intended to connect with each other in a deeper way beyond the ‘doings’ of our busy lives as we all engage in our next journeys separate, yet together in heart.

It is easy for parts of all of us to normalize relationship to some degree and not take a moment to just be in the goodness of what is, what was, and what we intend to be more of. This also feels to be a challenge for men especially. Taking sacred time with each other in honor and gratitude, or even much-needed truth-telling, wherever that truth is coming from or needs to lead.

Raphael and I took in the goodness of our surroundings, our own usness outside our personal romances with our beloved mates, and our history together as friends and co-conspirators of this starship we call SoulFullHeart. It was a tender moment to feel all that we have been through together in our history and especially here in Mexico. We could feel how unique our bond is as men and to feel how we have had the shades drawn a bit on our own desire for other men to be a part of a larger roundtable of heart and soul kings.

So we took the intentional space to let go of what was, honor it deeply, and open our hearts to more. More real, more galactic, more men, and more More, whatever that turns out to be. It was another layer of deep healing between two men that seek to offer it to other men in search of the same. It felt personal, global, and galactic. All that was missing was the cigarette. (Yup…I said that.)

Raphael and I both open our heart and soul journeys to men and women alike who feel resonate (and even those who may not fully) to explore their own inner world, this one and beyond. To take steps to heal and inhabit the practical, emotional, and spiritual steps to enter into a new relationship with self, other, and the universe at large. To open up your own personal disclosure project, click on the link below for more information.

Thank you for being a part of our living room. We look forward to more connection with you.

Gabriel Heartman and Raphael Awen
soulfullheartwayoflife.com/bridging-session

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Message From On High

It is time

Time to be free

Free of the ties that bind

The binds that have kept you safe, unknowable, and small

The relations, the assumptions, and the fears

That have all appeared as Love and Truth

Until they no longer did.

It is not so much your Mind and Beliefs that need to be examined or retrained,

But rather your heart that needs to be felt

Your soul that needs to be explored

And called into the court of your curiosity and divine compassion

What storylines have you still in chains, in regret, and in suffering

It is going into the deep well of your hidden, veiled, and protected caverns

That bring the greatest gifts to your arising awareness

That you have always been Free, been Loved, and been Alive

Feel and free yourself

You wonderful, glorious, and human expression

Of power, creation, Love, and beauty.

*****

Photo by Clever Visuals on Unsplash

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Owning And Transmuting The Prison That Lies Within

When one has been denied freedom, whether in the form of prison or being captured, for a very long time, there is something that happens in the mind and heart of said soul. It is like a form of The Stockholm Syndrome where you have identified with the captor/imprisoner in the name of survival. Only, in this case, the bars are no longer in front of you but they continue to exist energetically anyway. They were all that was ever known.

I have been digesting this inside of myself the last couple of days, where I can feel aspects of me that have been used to a particular consciousness, or way of relating to the world both inner and outer. There are goggles that are placed on them that were not put on them against their will, but so that they could ‘deal’ with the very real reality of True Freedom that stands right in front of them. They are not oblivious to this reality. It has been a necessary part of a healing process.

If there is no matrix, or if there was never one to begin with, we are left to address our own ownership of that which we feel like is imprisoning us. We are left to reconcile that we are the captor and the captured both. We are highly efficient and powerful creators that can manifest more than we are able to let in so we can use the power of our projection to devise all sorts of excuses that can buffer us from that reality, that I hold as my personal truth.

As the dawn of the New Era is shining is a powerful Divine light upon us, the shadow of those prison bars is becoming increasingly clear. The truth behind their existence needs to be taken responsibility for or else they will continue to stand right where they are at. I hold that these limitations, these projections, these fears have all been necessary but no longer serviceable. They are held inside by parts of you that have a long and varied history with both persecution and being persecuted. Captor and being captured. Find, feel, and release the chains of these heart and soul beings so that they can be transmuted into the grandeur of love they truly ARE.

******

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Journal With Nine: Healing The Symbol Projection

I felt inspired to have another go at conversing with the number 9 this morning. I felt a personal connection to its message and felt there was more to feel into with it. There was such an interesting response to it that I wasn’t totally expecting. I have not had a real deep relationship to numbers in my past and I haven’t taken to doing much ‘research’ on the matter. In a way, it keeps it pure and just arises from whatever comes from my heart. I encourage anyone who has a more intimate connection with numbers to do this very same thing and see what arises.

On that note I will check in with Nine and see how it is feeling today and where we might go:

Good morning Nine. Do you prefer the word or the number?

9: That is an interesting question. I guess it all depends on which perspective you want to come from. A more literary and poetic heart space or a more mathematical, paternal place.

Hmmmm….so you have a masculine and a feminine?

9: Well, don’t you?

Yeah, I do. I guess I never really thought of it in regards to a number, but when you put it that way it totally makes sense.

9: It also doesn’t have to make sense either. It is a question that leads us on a quest, just like Raphael always says.

Yeah, I like that. So we are questing. Getting to feel and understand each other and how we relate to each other through this dialogue.

9: Sure. Why not? You gotta hot date with Kalayna?

Well, every moment is a hot date with Kalayna. She is into this too so it is all a part the dance.

9: Yes, a dance. (Good answer with the hot date thing… 😉 That is what this exploration is. You and I are both a consciousness. I get my awareness and aliveness through you and I thus affect you. We can spend a lot of time exploring the technical nature of my numerology and that has its value and purpose, but taking that understanding and diving a bit deeper into how I, as a number, have an effect on a particular heart is a feminine approach.

I was feeling that distinctly yesterday in our conversation. I could feel a part of me wondering if I needed to do some research into what you ‘mean’ and yet I got a whole lot of meaning out of our encounter yesterday. I could feel how others who responded had their own intimate relationship with you that spanned a spectrum of reaction.

9: I do seem to have that effect on people. I am a very intense yet magical number if I do say so myself. I have a lot of stuff going on! Mathematically speaking I have a lot of parts! I house a lot of powerful energy and that be like riding a bucking bronco. So I understand the intense reactions that others have about me showing up in their lives. Or even being identified as me.

Yeah, I wanted to ask you about that. How do you feel about that?

9: Well, of course, there is an honor in it. But there is a lot of projection and over-identification that can arise. There is something that is meant to be understood about the nature of being drawn to a number but it doesn’t mean that one is meant to be determined by it. I only hold the power that one gives to me. If I represent chaos and that is all that one chooses to relate to me as then there is no room for what else I stand for which is the process of moving beyond into the new. This is where the feminine side of feeling wants to come in and hold space for the fear that is backed up in my name. I don’t want to be a reason why people are suffering. That is not what I am about.

Wow. I feel some of your own backed up truth in there Nine.

9: Yeah, I can feel that too, Gabriel. I can feel that for any idea/concept be it numerological, astrological, angelic, etc. We get all bound up in this intense energy that is not the nature of what we are meant to represent. We are change and stability both. Never meant to stay in a rut. I got this yesterday from you when you mentioned my curiosity of what it is like to be 10. I am not a victim to my location on a number line. I am more than that. I am energy. I am a symbol that is not set in stone. I can shift. Hell, turn me upside down and I am a six! How is that for multidimensionality? Thanks for letting me feel that Gabriel. I feel how I may have been holding a lot more than my share of this dynamic. An inner need of mine to be seen as valuable and wanted. I want to feel that in and of myself. And my parts. All 9 of them! Hmmm…9 lives.

I had no idea that we going here today Nine. I still have so many other curiosities about you and maybe we just needed the space to feel into this together.

9: I feel open to where this is meant to go Gabriel. I feel a big release here and that helps me to feel more of my own value as a number in relation to the human heart. Whew!. This is powerful work you are doing, my friend. I think it is time to let this breath and we can catch up tomorrow if that arises. I can feel how all these symbols could use a good cleanse, Gabriel. This could be your thing!

That would be interesting. Not sure I can make a living on holding space for symbols but I am open to what it offers us. You are magical being and I am blessed to have stumbled onto this with you. All in Divine Nining.

9: Hmmm….not sure about that one there, Gabriel. I like the effort, however. Before we leave I did want others to know that having their own personal connection with me would be very healing. I am open to connecting with them through their own hearts and computers. I am good with pen and paper too. Brings me back to the old days.

Ah, that feels like a great invitation Nine. Thank you. I look forward to what arises next in the space between us. We have a whole month in your honor!

9: Oooff! That is a lot of change coming our way. Okay! We got this!

*******

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Great Time To Be A Nine! (Oops…Alive!)

I decided to check in with the number 9 this morning as it seems a lot of people will be talking about it today feels like. Hard to not notice on a day like today, it being 9/9/1+8 and all. Here is my chat with this auspicious number:

Good morning, number 9. I was wondering if you would be up for some questions this morning. You are going viral today!

9: Yeah, you can say that. I can feel it in all my chakras! Lots of people talking about me today.

How does that feel to you?

9: It feels good. I don’t get a lot of recognition in everyday circumstances as there is no 9:99 on your clocks. My brethren tend to get the lion’s share of the exposure on that front. It’s all good. I like to be a little mysterious anyway. Kinda show up when you are least expecting me.

Hmmm…interesting. Why is that?

9: Well, I am a number that signifies a lot of change. Endings and completions. I am the death part of the rebirth cycle. That gets a lot of people feeling a little rumbly and nervous. Sometimes when change seems to arrive out of nowhere the only thing one can do is surrender or suffer. The choice becomes adamantly clear. Unless of course suffering is part of the learning and growing. I tend to want to get people to make their way to 10.

Does that feel a little lonely then?

9: No, not really. I have a lot of work to do! So many souls are on my doorstep and in my house Gabriel! This is a magical time to be a nine! Oh, I meant alive…sorry, occupational hazard.

Lol! Yes, I can see that. You feel alive to me even in the rumbles. You live on a tectonic fault line it feels like.

9: Oh my, yes. It has its moments. There is nothing dull about being the number nine. The one thing I love is watching the light of awareness go on when souls see the number 10 on the horizon. That there is a new beginning. They have to move from being one digit to becoming 2! This is a shift in consciousness that takes the time it takes. It means taking the steps to become like a newborn again. A 1 and 0 both. Woah, man. That is blowing my mind again. Sorry, I get this way from time to time when I take that in. What a rush from my perspective.

Wow…yeah. I can feel that strangely enough. I never thought I could connect to a number this way. You are pretty magical yourself there Nine. I actually feel some tears for you watching others move on.

9: Awwww…..that is kind of you, Gabriel. Maybe I need to feel the part of me that feels some sadness around that. I have just done my job for so long I have forgotten what it was like to dream about being 10. Maybe that is my next going-on place too. I guess as long as 8 is ready to take my place we can all find our next places!

Lol! Now you got it! What is the biggest thing you would like to tell others that you have learned in all your days of being Nine?

9: I would say that you were never meant to stay stuck. You were meant to move on. To become a 10. You were meant to say goodbye in order to say hello. Suffering in the fear of falling into Zero is held when you realize there is One right by your side. That One is always in you and never outside of you.

That was pretty profound Nine. Wow, thank you. I want to soak that One in. You just arouse different for me. I honor what you are and what you represent. A lot of goodness that can only arise from feeling the fear and even unworthiness of being a 10. Whew! I think I will stop here and let that be in the space today. I am so grateful we had this time together. Thank you for all you are Nine.

9: I am only that which is reflected onto me so I thank YOU for your recognition and how you have honored your own 9 moments inside of you and your growth. Here is to a new you and a new me as we feel and honor the old, that which is meant to serve something bigger than we can both even imagine.

Amen to that Nine. I love you. 🙂

******

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

How To Be The ‘I’ Of Your Inner Storm

I am going back into my writing vault to bring back a series I did about art and my healing journey. It was a time of going deep into the bowels of my pain and using a charcoal stick to bring out what was lying within. Though the subject matter looks and feels unsavory, the light of a new awareness and relationship to myself was unmistakable. It has taken the time it has taken, but it all began with a movement, a choice, and a desire to own and love my pain. What I am now discovering as my inner feminine seeking her place within the court, and core, of my heart.

You don’t need to consider yourself an ‘artist’ to simply draw what you feel. It is energy and energy expresses itself in a multitude of ways that doesn’t always look like something in particular. The stick figures I drew were perfect for what I needed to express what I was feeling. If I let a punishing or critical voice expect something more I would not have gotten to the real purpose of the drawing.

This one specifically centered around the inner critical voice I had at the time. It was one that had been with me for as long as could remember and does come out at times to be felt. This was an energy that I deeply desired to tap into as it created extreme energy drops and reactive fusions. As we awaken to the largess of our being, we inevitably wake up our inner demons and dragons. The way we relate to them is what brings about the deepest change. Here is a guided meditation I did to meet and love your inner critic/punisher:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0cTe6ayIAWk

When this energy would come up it would kick up all my other parts inside me and whirl through me like a tornado wreaking havoc. I did not see that at the time but needed the eyes and open heart of another (through Jelelle and Raphael) to reflect that back to me so that I let that in because I WAS the tornado and not the ‘I’ of the storm. If you wish to read more you can go here:
https://soulfullheartblog.com/…/healing-art-day-1-critical…/

Art is a powerful tool to access the nooks and treasure troves of our heart and soul. It is the feminine act of creation and intuition that births the mirror of what it is that we are meant to look at and receive with our heart-eyes. It is not just drawing but any form of creative expression that is the gift of our humanity to cultivate and explore to the depths of our being. If you are curious to feel more into the integration and exploration of your own creative healing journey, please contact me or visit the link below. It is a journey that promises to take you to where you need to go, not necessarily where parts of you may expect to go.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Art As A Mirror And A Doorway Into The Heart And Soul

Bringing outside what lives inside can be the beginning of a vast exploration of the myriad energies that make up the wholeness of You.

The picture below was done during a time (around 2014 I think) when I was feeling a deep depression that felt almost immovable. While I was in it I feel like I needed to get it out rather than letting it envelop me. I can remember the feeling of barely getting the paper on the table and grabbing the charcoal stick. It needed to be charcoal because it looked just like I felt. Dark and grey.

I remember having no clue what I wanted to draw and just let the feeling travel from my heart to my hands and it translated to a swirl of grey in the center. I was swirling on the inside so it matched. Then it got darker and darker. I smudged the charcoal because that is what I felt like too…smudged. As I stared at the picture a began to feel how I was in this tunnel like environment, on the inside looking out. Wanting to feel something different than what I was feeling. Wanting to feel lighter. Freer. Less confined and dismal.

Then as I felt this energy leaving my being and bleeding its way onto the paper, I felt to draw the figure sitting on the floor of this tunnel staring out. Looking…watching…waiting. I could feel this being as different than me at that moment. He was me and not me at the same time. He was a part or aspect of me that felt this way. He was looking for someone to connect with him so he didn’t feel so hopeless. This is when the depression became not who I was, but held by a part of me that had a story and a reason.

This act spurred on other pictures that were not all that detailed. They were simple yet had emotional substance and a reality held by something inside of me that was not all of me. It became less about depression and more about self-discovery. The sunrise of curiosity was breaching the infinite ocean of despair and I had a relationship to it….to him, or maybe it was always Her. My hidden and disowned feminine wanting to be claimed by her King. Either way, it changed my relationship both emotionally and physically to my depression.

Even if you don’t fancy yourself an ‘artist’ the act of moving something on paper, canvass, or computer screen, can open a doorway to your heart and soul that invites a relationship, a curiosity, and a compassion. This is more than just art therapy, but a beginning to discovering the lost and hidden aspects of what and who you really are in both the shadow and the light. It moves from the paper back into You in a whole new way that doesn’t just provide relief but a new consciousness that can lift you into new technicolor timelines.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Exploring And Feeling The Wounded Feminine Within A Man’s Heart

I feel a sacred journey arising for myself in a renewed journey into my emotional body, more specifically around my inner masculine and feminine polarities. There is a depth of wonder and wound that is at the heart of it. To not go there in my opinion and personal experience, is to miss something profound in our evolution as humans. The emotional body houses our human experience, the ‘data collector’ of our soul’s exploration.

Currently, I am feeling my inner feminine in relation to my inner masculine energy. To fully engage in this relationship as a Man with this Woman can be a bit of a roller coaster. It turns things on its head in regards to how She has related to parts of my life. Was She part of the early rage I experienced as a child? What did She feel about my family, my friends, my jobs, my mates? What does want and need from me as my inner feminine? Who She is and what She wants is a huge part of who I am as a man. Really? Yeah, man, I feel it deeply.

There is a huge elephant in the collective room between the masculine and feminine as expressed in the physical between men and women. There are fascinating mirrors all around us when we engage in this aspect of shadow work that is meant to illuminate, heal, and integrate. This IS spiritual work. This is a deep, powerful awakening into our sacred humanity. The polarity can only be made truly whole by feeling the poles in their wounds and needs.

The feminine in men and women alike is like a genie in a bottle. It has been repressed, suppressed, sequestered, and protected. It holds the imprint of so many those that have been the most intimate to us in our lives such as mothers, sisters, relatives, friends, mates, etc. I am connecting to my feminine through the template of my sister that I have not explored deeply before. It is a fascinating exploration that is illuminating so much about my relationship to life, love, and relationship to others.

For men and women, this offers a profound brave new world that has effects in all areas of our lives. Most intimately it is the relationship we hold within ourselves where this is illuminated the most. As men (as well as the masculine in women), we have tended to negate our inner sensitivity and beauty which is really our inner feminine feeling that of herself. She holds that gift and has not been fully able to feel that from our masculine heart to hers. As her story unfolds, and her needs met, we are given a new look into what makes us truly masculine (and feminine too!). I will continue to write more about what I experience as well as what I get from the beautiful souls that I am serving that are on their own inner gender healing quest. Stay tuned…She is ready to be heard and seen.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.