Anxiety: A Peek Into The SoulFullHeart Process

By Raianna Shai

A couple of nights ago, I experienced anxiety in a way that I hadn’t in quite a long time. One thing that was very different this time was simply my awareness of it. I never totally realized that I had quite a bit of anxiety in the past. I always thought that because it wasn’t inherently debilitating that I was just an overthinker.

But I feel that this experience is quite prevalent in most of us, and is a mix of different relationships between parts of us.

For myself, it felt like my inner child feeling scared of “getting in trouble”. She wants so badly to love, feel joy and play in the beauty of life. But when things happen in my life that are more “adult” and difficult, my Protector will put her out front so that it’s harder for others to get mad at me. Who really wants to yell at a child?

My Inner Protector also has fear, for getting in trouble means he has somehow failed me. So he tends to try and avoid these situations as much as possible in order to protect my other parts such as my inner child.

Then my Inner Punisher comes into play by judging my Inner Child for getting something wrong in the first place. For he’s constantly looking for things that she could improve. When deep down, he really just judges himself for the way he feels he has to be.

All this to say that no matter how bad my anxiety or depression gets, the biggest thing that gets me through and allows me to grow from the situation is feeling the dynamics going on inside.

It’s different for everyone but what’s the same is that all of our parts ultimately want love and to be heard. So if we take the time and space (if we can) to get to know these parts of ourselves then MAYBE we can begin to draw these feelings and situations less and less.

Here is *sort of* a poem I wrote to illustrate the process I had that night!

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Tears of hopeless frustration

Feeling lost in a sea of emotion

Stomach tense in fear and expectation

Anxiety takes hold with intense ferocity

Sleep is lost to the silence of the night

Tossing and turning with measured repetition

Then I remember the family inside of me

Waiting to be felt

Waiting to be heard and loved

“What can I do for you, my loves?”

“How can I help?”

“I’m scared and just want to have joy”

Says the little one

“I fear failure, that I put you in danger”

Says the fierce protector

“I don’t like this, and I need to to fix it”

Says the punishing voice

“You are all loved, supported and heard”

I say

“You, little one, need not to worry of things in the adult world. You are the joy and love I need to tell my truth with compassion.”

“You, my loving guard, need not to protect the others. I am here now, to hold the space with intention and strength.”

“You, my precious critic, need not to judge yourself or others. You were needed once before, but now you may rest.”

And with that

The child tucked in

The protector at rest

The punisher soothed

I sleep in peace

*****

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, community, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Feeling And Healing The Inner Punisher In Service Of Love

When you are in a profession such as medical, education, business, etc. you are in a constant state of learning the new data, trends, and practices that will keep you up to date and on the leading edge of the field.

As a healer and a light/shadow worker it is very similar. I am in constant ‘professional development’ to better serve myself first and then in overflow to my facilitants/clients. Without me keeping dibs on my emotospiritual needs, I run the risk of a kind of malpractice in a way. This is not a form of shadow hunting, just being keenly aware of what my next steps are.

I came to hold space for a deeper layer of what we call the Inner Punisher. My current facilitants have had this show up for them at the same time, so it felt like a reflection to feel in myself. This is part of the development. Of becoming aware of what we may still be unaware of. The signs are right there in front of us when we are open and willing to see them, even if it feels uncomfortable.

This lead to a deep process with what we also call the Inner Father. These two energies were both merged as I had a lot of early childhood trauma with my biological father. There was a legacy of harshness and rage that had been handed down to the males in my family tree. It can’t help to be transferred from one son to the next. However, for me, this inner critical voice was internalized and expressed as self-punishment.

As I held this as a part of me, an Inner Father that wanted me to be normal and successful, I began to feel the vulnerability set in. I asked many questions to unearth what was at the root of his rage and anxiety. Once we got there, the tears began to flow for all that he felt like he had become as a mirror of my outer father.

He called himself Sarge like a Sergeant in the army. Both my father and grandfather were Marines and this was imprinted in my DNA. It has many Metasoul connections as well. I felt my compassion for him and even offered him forgiveness. That was hard for him to let in.

This is a deep energy that takes time, through rounds of healing and feeling, to get to the core of where the punishment comes from and how it has played out in so many ways. When it is coupled with a mother or father imprint it can pack a lot of energy but also a lot of healing. Our birth families offer us a lot of fodder for growth and transformation.

I have not been in contact with my father for many years. However, I could feel his higher self with me, offering remorse for what he was unable to offer me this life. That lead to another deep healing inside of me. I felt his old energy leave my field and felt a newer one integrate inside of me.

This has been years in the making and I feel a renewed sense of my own Gabrielness for lack of a better term. It is this Gabrielness that is the heart of my Service to Other. It is what lets me upgrade my system in order to let in more Light and Love to hold space and guide with compassion. I offer that space to you as well if you feel the desire to get to the core of this critical energy or any other energy you feel is keeping you in a lowered state of frequency of being. This is the reason I am here and the reason I continue to heal.

Gabriel Heartman
soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

We offer a free 30-45 minute intro call via Zoom to see how the SoulFullHeart process may serve you in your healing and growth. Click the above link for more info or you can PM me. 🙂

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Loving UP Your Body-Vessel

by Kalayna Solais

It has become so important to love the body beyond any measurements, beyond any sense of “not good enough”, beyond any shame once held by parts of you about looking this way instead of that way.

For years parts of me have judged and battled with my body and body image. They have especially struggled with accepting my legs, which have always been bigger, and my tendency to yo-yo a bit in my weight.

Parts of me have judged themselves for eating emotionally, for continuing to make food mean ‘love’ somehow. They have struggled so much over the years with relating to food more so as survival and even something not as necessary as we are taught it is.

Even in this world of spirituality and Ascension consciousness, there is a tendency for parts of us to judge the body for not yet being ‘light body’ worthy or for going through the many changes and shifts it needs to go through as we continue to transition into crystalline forms.

The body reflects the emotional reality, always, and this manifests in so many different ways, giving us so much valuable information to be with and digest.

These judgements come often from an Inner Punisher part inside of you that is concerned about sticking out, about you inhabiting your leadership, about Ascension on all levels.

For more about the Inner Punisher, here is a video from Jelelle where she also leads a guided meditation to connect with this part of you:

They criticize and poke because it means love to them somehow. It helps them feel empowered, ironically, because in the judgements of self is a defense against judgements from others. A preemptive strike within that hurts you first before someone else can hurt you. Wow. It might sound convoluted but if you really feel this one, it’s very true, and often unaddressed or felt through with love and self-compassion. The Inner Punisher does not respond well to more punishment… this energy can only transmute with love.

Here is a guided meditation co-created by Gabriel and I, narrated by Gabriel, that you could use as another tool to connect with this part of you:

This part is so ingrained in our 3D Self that it’s become natural to feel the punishment that becomes a white noise in our lives, always sort of there yet so naturalized we hardly notice how much it’s bringing our frequency down. This is so one of the major pieces that needs to shift into love in the 3D Self before this Self, this version of you, can really start to integrate and move into higher frequencies consistently.

I’m sharing this photo today because it hallmarks a new beginning for me and an outing too.

I no longer want to subscribe to the adage of needing to look a certain way and I don’t want parts of me to feel this way about themselves either.

I no longer want to hide how my body looks because it doesn’t comply with typical beauty standards.

I suspect my body will continue to go through more changes through my own personal Ascension process and to truly be IN it without feeling like I have to force it to be one way or another in order to be worthy of anyone’s love let alone my own, is my deepest intention in this moment.

Our bodies are part of our Ascension journey… to honour and love them UP, even as they are now, is so, so important.

Much love to you and YOUR beautiful vessel too! ❤

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Loving Your Inner Beast

By Raianna Shai

Self judgement and unworthiness are feelings that are hard to reach the root of. It can take years of unraveling just why and how we truly see ourselves and how it plays out in our lives. We can point fingers at all the people who made us feel small. The people who judged us. The people who could never forgive our mistakes. The people who invalidated our feelings.

But what about the part of you that has done all the same things? The part that tells you you’re not good enough. That constantly reminds you of your mistakes. That judges every move you make, every awkward thing you do. What if this part of you wasn’t just judging you, but judging itself? And what if all the hate and anger and insults were just this part’s way of trying to protect you? We are not victims to our circumstances, so anyone or anything that hurts you is a reflection of a part inside that hurts you too.

I’ve been working with this part of me lately, which can be called a Punisher part, to feel how and why my insecurity can get in the way of my own self love and how it affects my relationships. His name is Brutus and he sees himself as a beast – like in Beauty and the Beast. And all of the goodness that lives inside me can be represented by a rose covered in a glass case. He is fiercely loyal and strives to protect this rose by any means necessary. But his version of protection is to judge her until she does everything perfectly – then no one else can judge her.

This part of me is not easy to feel. He is harsh, brutal and very unforgiving. Every person that has ever gotten mad at me, judged me, or insulted me has actually been backed up by him. He takes everything that was said or felt about me and multiplies it by 10. He expects me to do better, he feels ashamed for how I acted or things I said, he punishes me for doing something wrong.

So instead of using the knowledge and intuition he has about my emotions to protect me, he actually just makes me feel worse about it. But one thing I’ve learned is that he just wants love himself. In his vulnerability, he feels so much remorse for how he has made other parts of me feel about themselves and in turn, other people. He feels he doesn’t deserve love or forgiveness.

But the second me and all parts of me truly forgave him, he started to shift massively. He turned into a prince and he could feel all that he has to offer. Intuition, discernment, and a healthy protection and transparency about how I’m really feeling.

So when I am feeling unworthiness or when there is a truth I need to say to someone, I can call on him and his opened out heart to say what I need to say. Instead of letting my hurt build up and explode out, we will work together to be honest and loving to ourselves and others. Because kindness cannot come from an empty vessel. We must cultivate it within ourselves so deeply, that we can’t help but overflow into others.

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, community, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

How To Be The ‘I’ Of Your Inner Storm

I am going back into my writing vault to bring back a series I did about art and my healing journey. It was a time of going deep into the bowels of my pain and using a charcoal stick to bring out what was lying within. Though the subject matter looks and feels unsavory, the light of a new awareness and relationship to myself was unmistakable. It has taken the time it has taken, but it all began with a movement, a choice, and a desire to own and love my pain. What I am now discovering as my inner feminine seeking her place within the court, and core, of my heart.

You don’t need to consider yourself an ‘artist’ to simply draw what you feel. It is energy and energy expresses itself in a multitude of ways that doesn’t always look like something in particular. The stick figures I drew were perfect for what I needed to express what I was feeling. If I let a punishing or critical voice expect something more I would not have gotten to the real purpose of the drawing.

This one specifically centered around the inner critical voice I had at the time. It was one that had been with me for as long as could remember and does come out at times to be felt. This was an energy that I deeply desired to tap into as it created extreme energy drops and reactive fusions. As we awaken to the largess of our being, we inevitably wake up our inner demons and dragons. The way we relate to them is what brings about the deepest change. Here is a guided meditation I did to meet and love your inner critic/punisher:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0cTe6ayIAWk

When this energy would come up it would kick up all my other parts inside me and whirl through me like a tornado wreaking havoc. I did not see that at the time but needed the eyes and open heart of another (through Jelelle and Raphael) to reflect that back to me so that I let that in because I WAS the tornado and not the ‘I’ of the storm. If you wish to read more you can go here:
https://soulfullheartblog.com/…/healing-art-day-1-critical…/

Art is a powerful tool to access the nooks and treasure troves of our heart and soul. It is the feminine act of creation and intuition that births the mirror of what it is that we are meant to look at and receive with our heart-eyes. It is not just drawing but any form of creative expression that is the gift of our humanity to cultivate and explore to the depths of our being. If you are curious to feel more into the integration and exploration of your own creative healing journey, please contact me or visit the link below. It is a journey that promises to take you to where you need to go, not necessarily where parts of you may expect to go.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Guided Meditation: Meet & Love Your Inner Punisher

by Gabriel Heartman

One of the most difficult aspects of our healing can be coming to terms with our ‘Inner Punisher’ voice or what is frequently referred to as the ‘Inner Critic’. This voice is the one that keeps other parts of you in a state of guilt and smallness. There is a very good reason for it and it is usually used as a protection to keep you from getting hurt, as ironic as that may feel.

This part, when felt and given a sacred space to bring out its truth, can transform to a deep ally as your healthy discernment, truth-teller, and boundary-setter. This occurs over a back and forth relationship that develops and reveals over time.

This meditation, written by SoulFullHeart Facilitator Kalayna Colibri and voiced by Gabriel Heartman, takes you to a hallway of doors where you get to meet and feel the presence of your ‘inner- punishing’ energy. You are escorted and supported by your sacred masculine and sacred feminine guides. You will encounter your ‘Inner Protector’ along the way to make sure that this is the time for this meeting. (More on the Inner Punisher here: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/protectorpart)

If you have not met your Inner Protector yet, we advise that you do so before this meditation as the entry point into your emotional body. You can find that at:

The music gratefully used in this guided meditation is from Taos Winds Spirit Music Channel:

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Being With Your Inner Masculine As A Woman

by Kalayna Colibri

I wrote a digestion a few days back of the incoming energies really working the wounded masculine – helping us to see it within ourselves, others, the world around us, and in so doing, to help us start to see the emerging Sacred Masculine, which we cannot really start to feel until we can feel what it is NOT first… as always, starting within.

I’ve actually been working with my Inner Masculine for a few years now as part of my process on the SoulFullHeart path. “He” has had many forms – Inner Protector, Gatekeeper (4D protector of your soul, especially your Metasoul Aspects), Inner Father, Inner Punisher, and all in all, my Inner Mate. all in different waves, layers and expressions, all with different names and frequencies too. Nowadays he goes by the name of “Malcolm” and together we are feeling through what feel like some lingering and perhaps finally completing tendrils and ties to 3D reality, which he has held as so dear for so long, and for many valuable reasons.

As a woman, it feels so incredibly important to acknowledge, deeply feel, and profoundly honour the Inner Masculine within, as they are as much a part of what makes up the remaining patriarchal and wounded masculine frequencies and realities in our current world and widespread reality, both within and outside of us. We have as much responsibility to feel these frequencies within as men do… and this world we are experiencing and wanting to deconstruct in order to rebuild into New Earth, is one we, as parts of us, have co-created.

Today I chose to spend a magical and unfolding afternoon with Malcolm, as it was his wish to do this with me… to have some dedicated “us” time where we can feel each other and feel our relationship start to move into higher vibrations together. He waxed metaphysical as we sat in a local (very Mexican, very sweet!) coffee shop and journaled together. I will share our dialogue together, as it offers you a bridge into being with a part of you, and a way in which to be with your own Inner Masculine (as a man or woman!).

~

Malcolm: I like this place, Kalayna… A/C would be nice, but it’s good…. Coffee is good, new environment is good… can’t get too congested and busy in here because it’s so small, AND they speak English really well! It’s sweet… and it’s nice to not have to hold Spanish with you right now.

Kalayna: Right? And after all that notebook hunting, looking for a small one to fit into a purse, we still ended up with more stuff than will (really) fit in my purse. Hilarious!

M: I know… oh well… I have to get used to letting go of agendas and pictures… or at least any attachment to them.

K: Yes, well, that will come… is here already, actually. You are doing it, little by little.

M: Yes. I’m letting that (and you) in!

I’m sorry I can be such an ass sometimes…
K: It’s OK, Malcolm. That isn’t very common now… you are not an ‘ass’, my friend. You are protective sometimes maybe, but nothing more than that.

M: Thank you… I do feel like I am changing. Sometimes it’s hard to believe how much I can change actually and AM being invited to change, which really in my case means letting go more than anything else.

K: What does ‘letting go’ mean to you?

M: Oof… well, control. Letting go of control or any attempt at it. God, THAT alone causes so much stress, because life IS out of control… YOU are out of control.

K: I am? 🙂

M: Ummmm, well, your growth is, yes! Your destiny is, yes!

K: What do you feel about ‘destiny’, Malcolm?

M: I feel like it is a fixed star always on the horizon. Just, I don’t know, the highest point of your highest timeline… where maybe someone may not get to in one particular timeline, but eventually their soul will get there. OK, I am waxing metaphysical right now!

K: Please go on! I love it!

M: (blushing a little) OK… I will continue.

What if “destiny” isn’t a carrot held by Divine forces, but is instead an inevitability? And what if maybe the destiny, the Grand Destiny, if you will, is really just an ultimate return to love, but with ALL of the growth, changes and trajectories you’ve inhabited left intact. A “return to Source” in a way, but as the mosaic piece you ARE becoming fully carved out and painted in your soul’s unique energies and colours? I get the sense that humans are unique beings because they have and ARE uniqueness… I don’t know. It’s that Conscious Duality piece again, it seems (side note: more on Conscious Duality on our blog, if you’re curious).

K: Yes, wow, that actually opens something up in my heart. Thank you, Malcolm.

M: Yeah… it feels good and purposeful and interesting…. We came from love and unto love we shall return… with significance, not pride or arrogance. Yet significance. And reverence for ALL… wow… Juicy!

K: Sure is! 🙂

M: Thank you for this today, Kalayna.

K: You’re so welcome, Malcolm. More of this to come, sometimes with Gabriel too! 😀 And of course our other beloveds too… with more beloveds to come soon.

M: Yes! I would like that…

K: Me too. 

~

The pictures accompanying this post are from today! Me at the coffee shop (you can sort of see/feel Malcolm in my field), some goodies well-enjoyed, and the beautiful sun codes we took in together too. 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Practical Ascension: 7 Key Areas Of Life – The Inner Punisher (Emotional Area)

by Kalayna Colibri and Gabriel Heartman

 

In this video, SoulFullHeart Facilitators, Teachers and Sacred Union mates, Gabriel Heartman and Kalayna Colibri, invite you to feel the tones of your Inner Punisher/Critic. This part is intense to work with, as its name implies, yet it also opens out so much more love flow within and through you, from you to you and you to others. Kalayna and Gabriel both share about their experiences of working with and healing different layers of the Inner Punisher and what they have noticed through working with and supporting healing in others too. It is sometimes the hardest part to be with, at least at first, yet they are one of the parts that needs the MOST love!

In many ways, we are raised by the Inner Punisher and its frequencies in our caregivers/parents and other authority figures that we lean into growing up. This is a part that energizes much criticism inside of you towards parts of you, yet also towards others. As it heals, so does the energy with which your intuition and discernment comes as well. This part is a critical one to work with as a healer or ‘lightworker’, as its energies can very often leak out in unconscious ways towards those who you actually desire to support in their own healing. Feeling this part means feeling the often shadowy conditioning you were raised with and that has become naturalized in your life and culture. The other side of this process leads ultimately to deeper, more profound love and self-acceptance and a keen discernment about life that comes from love instead of fear. The many layers of the Inner Punisher that you would feel in your SoulFullHeart process are all worth it, as you begin to feel your genuine worth and love flow in a much bigger way than you would have otherwise!

If you have any questions or comments, you can leave them in the comment thread here on the blog, on the Youtube video comment thread, or find us on Facebook (just look for Kalayna Colibri and/or Gabriel Heartman and/or SoulFullHeart Way Of Life!). You can also email soulfullhearts@gmail.com.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. 

 Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Healing Inner Punisher And Shame – Day 26: 33 Days Metamorphosis W/Jelelle Awen (Video)

By Jelelle Awen

In today’s video, Day 26 of this 33 Days of Metamorphosis, I talk about the Inner Punisher part of the 3D Self. This Punisher energy can show up in spirituality in terms of ‘battling’ the ego, annihilating the ego, obliterating the ego, and going to ‘war’ or against something else from inside, etc.

The Inner Punisher forms in response to the 3D culture that is polarized to going outward to judge others or turning the judgement inward or both. This is templated from caregivers/parents that hold these energies toward us.

Your Inner Punisher can be quite strong and you may not even notice it at first until you start tracking this energy and how it suppresses, judges, and pushes up shame reactions. One main suffering loop that you may experience is between the Inner Punisher and shame reactions that come up from the Inner Teenager/Inner Child usually. The feeling tones of shame are ‘I am wrong’ and ‘I deserve to be punished and judged’.

We don’t go to battle with the Punisher in the SoulFullHeart process, we actually help it transform to its higher frequency expressions of discernment, intuition, and guidance with love. It also helps to set boundaries with love; discern with love; offer guidance with love. Eventually the Punisher integrates into your growing 5D Self and is able to offer forgiveness and compassion inside and to others in an authentic way.

This is the writing that I mentioned today: https://soulfullheartblog.com/2018/01/25/loving-your-ego-into-healing-letting-go-and-surrender/

To read more about the Inner Punisher and other parts go here: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts
To read more about sessions, including a free intro, go here: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Thank you for joining us on this twenty sixth day of 33….as we move into Metamorphosis energies together…..one beloved part of us at a time!

You are invited to share comments on your experiences connected to this series and questions too on facebook, the blog athttps://soulfullheartblog.com, and on the SFH Experience Youtube channel for which I will respond and offer reflections/guidance.

Donations are so appreciated and received with gratitude as an energy exchange in the offering of this series for free through paypal: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/donations or the SoulFullHeart Patreon Page: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart

Go here to view the playlist listing all of the videos: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7Pj3hPLsv0&list=PLNmrHdaQSAvIkhNtLWKs-osheX1SoBFpI

~

 

Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of three books about Ascension, Divine Feminine and Masculine, emotional body integration through parts work, quantum healing through Metasoul Aspect connection, sacred union, light body transformation, and much more!

Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions and a free intro session, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Transmuting The Fear-Based ‘Love’ Lens Of Modern Spirituality, Starting Within

by Kalayna Colibri

love transmutation

It’s becoming more apparent than ever, how ‘love’ has been offered in very many different spiritual healing modalities and practices, and yet not lived into deeply by those who are teaching about it. What becomes very intense to feel, is the way in which love is often mixed in with intense amounts of fear and non-vulnerable responses to others and especially to the self. Words like ‘unconditional love’ are offered, yet often coupled with energies of shaming, criticism, and judgment, subtle or not. Judgment and punishing energies come from parts of us that need our love and attention and their intensity is often off-gassed, put onto others without a sense of personal accountability or consciousness. Judgment, in and of itself, is not ‘bad’ and, in fact, has been a necessary thing when it comes to moving through 3D life, and with work, it can heal to healthy discernment and a letting in of deep compassion. The primary energy though with which we tend to hold judgments is another thing entirely and is typically an expression of a need for more time within you. Healthy discernment and expressions of intuition come from many years of working with Inner Punishers/Judgers, which is a powerful way to find your authentic sense of compassion and Love too, starting, always, from you to you. Until these frequencies are given space to heal within, they actually can run through every area of our lives, dulling our sense of wonder at ourselves let alone others, and taming our reality of and access to higher frequencies of Love.

It has been really coming to light lately, that heavy-handed judgments from healers who are supposed to be offering deep healing to others are actually the norm. There are judgments and invasive read-outs being offered that are disguised as ‘love’ and assumed to BE ‘love’ by those receiving. There have also been SO many fear-based messages given without consciousness and often touted as channellings. Indeed, what we have learned is ‘love’ and have felt to BE ‘love’ so often misses the mark and is actually based in immense fear…. understandably so in some ways, given how harsh and challenging 3D reality has been, yet this reality is being invited to shift in every moment of our ever-expanding consciousness and our ever-opening and healing Sacred Human hearts.

Perhaps this is one of the main sources of pain in all of our bodies, physical, emotional, etc. right now during this phase of Ascension… we need to clear ourselves of the false love we have taken in from so many, so we can re-calibrate and learn what real Love IS… and that the only source of ‘unconditional love’ we can rely on is inside of us and with the Divine. It IS possible to experience deep love in ALL relationships outside of ourselves and in fact, we need to hold out for it, settle for nothing less than it, and we also need to let go of the label or expectation of it ever being ‘unconditonal’ when coming from another. We can recognize each other as expressions of Infinite Love and feel Love and authentic compassion for each other based on this picture, yet this can only really happen if we can feel this inside ourselves first in all ways and in all parts of us too.

The Love we are truly made of and deeply wanting more of, consciously or unconsciously, is right here, waiting for those moments of entry into us. The more we choose to express Love within ourselves, including being with parts of us that need us and Metasoul Aspects too, but also including the food we eat, the ways in which we treat our bodies, the meditation practices we sit in, and the relationships we have and inhabit. There is so much that Love, in all of its many shapes, colours, and textures, wants to come into you and show Itself for what it really is and how it really feels when it is truly, authentically, REALly there inside and beside you… ❤


If you are ready to begin or continue the process of going deeper into your own Love overflow that offers you a real sense of PURE Love starting within, you can have a look at: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sfhprocess and feel into having a free 30min intro session with one of my beloveds or myself. We would love to support you on your journey and the nourishment of doing so, so goes both ways! ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.