Lunar Eclipse Supports Feeling Shadow of Polarizations, Invites Unity

By Kalayna Colibri

Last night while witnessing the moon’s eclipse and feeling it hanging very close to my field, I was struck by a feeling of emerging sisterhood in my life and process, yet also the potential for it worldwide.

Yet… the temptation for many seems to still be that the way to unify is in anger. The way to find our common ground is to get pissed. To rage. To march. To condemn the masculine… in men yet also in each other. This is masculine versus masculine in the end, leaving the world inside and outside of us without any room for the sacred masculine AND feminine to unite and make love.

Pointing fingers, protesting, arguing without care of where and how it lands in each other is a phase of our relationship to each other that wants to move into something new. It’s a deep shadow expression of our fear of actually loving ourselves and each other. It’s a fear that the cycles of pain will continue while we continue to become a cog in the wheel, contributing to this cycle with that same fear. Real intimacy brings up a lot more than anger and push-away. It brings up tears and vulnerability, it brings up what’s underneath the rage and presses the heart to open in order to keep giving and receiving nourishment.

This picture of relationship I’m describing is not idealized or impossible… I get to live this every day, I get to be challenged by the presence of others who want to keep this flow going within themselves and with me, I get to feel and meet the challenge of continuing to move through my resistance to love and to keep letting it in… knowing full well that doing so means walking into fires of personal funeral pyres as the old way of approaching life and others passes away, and also knowing that it means getting to experience the heaven of a deeper and easier love flow than I’ve ever experienced before.

Even last night… sharing intimacy with my mate Gabriel, feeling his admiration of myself, my body, my heart and soul, I felt my admiration for his and let his male gaze into every pore. I felt so many tears come up and out like a fountain, feeling the pain of my soul and heart in relating to the masculine in ways that weren’t nourishing on either side and feeling afraid of it. Feeling the pain of a collective of women and what they’ve experienced and also the pain of the men who have not ever been initiated into how to make real love with a woman and what it feels like to be truly met or felt on their side either.

The more energy that’s spent in blame-game shaming and pushing away at each other, the less opportunities we create for the deep healing and nourishing intimacy that’s possible, that wants to bloom and blossom starting between parts of you that are polarized to each other but who want love more than anything else in this world. Starting to see and feel these dynamics within is the best and most profound way to shift what you draw in your outer relationships and what you start to see is really possible with each of them. ❤️

For support as you go into this territory and really feel how it all applies or could apply to you, my beloveds and I hold sacred session space for these explorations and more: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

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Healing Layers Of Our Projected Realities

by Kalayna Colibri

 

astral-projection

Our conditioning living deep within, gives us overlays of meaning to grasp at, applied to all circumstances and relationships. We assume much based on our older experiences, our other experiences. We bring it all forward to be projected onto the new and emerging, not because we are lost or wrong, but because we need to. We need to see this day as grey, that romance as doomed, this woman as ‘mom’. We need to feel patterns re-emerging, reinstating themselves in an effort to wake us up to something – but what? Layers of wounding on a soul level, on a heart level, on a human level, compound and break us into new-old scenarios so that we can feel their roots and begin to apply new lenses, no framework, allowing old scaffolding to heal. These known structures of life, familiar ways to see and experience all around us, have been necessary and now, with our ascending selves and no-selves, it is all being brought out to the light. An invitation to wake up, yes. To what has been and what could be now if that timeline is chosen.

There is much to heal, but even more to feel… gifting us with polished wings meant to fly us to new heights, new vistas, many changes through rumbles and shifts. Feeling ourselves, feeling each other, feeling LOVE. We are here to keep working and anchoring those grids girded within an ever-expanding and healing ‘I’ space in the temple of the Sacred Human individual spark of the Whole. Then the sense of what is ‘real’ beyond and yet within the imagination, can become the Golden Earth of relationship to ALL that our souls know and our hearts long for. New, honey-golden, sparkling overlays are possible now, with much more tangibility in the Love Field of us, that joins our hearts and holds each arising moment as precious, sacred, and unique.

Our projections become maps for us to find out more about who we are now, who we have been and who we may become. They gift us with the opportunity to see things differently once the attachment to these overlayed realities begins to heal and move. There is a need within us to find our way through the deepest woods within by following the beacon of projected reality, for this reality IS what’s ‘real’ until it isn’t, until it doesn’t need to be in the same way anymore. And then, yes THEN, we can become more of who are in this new ‘now’, who we came here to become, who we signed up to remember that we always were underneath our needed stories, our life’s slideshows of memories, and our wounds that will soon heal as we show up for them to. This is the terrain to travel when feeling and healing the inner matrices, the falling apart inner grids, the ‘old’ ways of being, doing, experiencing life and our relationships with others. This awareness of even having ‘projections’ to work with is a first step to the awareness and the exit out of the cave, the fall down a new rabbit hole, the entrance to a birth canal. This is some of the more challenging territory to heal and yet, it is so possible, if we can say ‘yes’ to the need for a mirror that helps us see more of it within us and follow the golden thread of Love wherever it wants to lead us to inside and outside of us.


In SoulFullHeart, we offer ongoing sessions, group calls, and plenty of online support through writings, videos, recordings, etc that lead you deeper into your own awareness of your overlays and projections that colour your life and create the patterns you’ve lived into.  Through the connection to parts of you that we offer, support and facilitate, you will find more of your shadow, your light, your reasons for having become the way you are now, claiming the life you are now. If you would like to know more about us, our community and the healing gifts we are here to offer you, please visit www,soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information. ❤

 

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Queen Sheets On A Double Bed

by Kalayna Colibri

meiying-ng-71590

 

Growth beyond the place we inhabit now

comes in wave forms and reshaping of dreams

intentions

and ways of feeling the self

BEYOND the self…

 

Climbing higher and reaching further

inside

creating a launch pad within an incubator

finding ignition switches in the heart.

 

A growing UP while expanding OUT

increasing all capacities learned and borrowed and agreed to

taking it all to a fireplace hearth of love

for the inner moments

movements

trials

and triggers

that serve the aching, baking

WAKING way

of relearning-ness

and most importantly…

re-LEAN-ing-ness.

 

A ledge of fortified former disguises

now un-guiled, not forgotten

spring forth all that’s needed

to fill the new space

created within…

 

There’s a nest there now

built exquisitely for one

yet with added room for two…

without need for stretching

or pressing

at anything yet immutable.

 

The new new-ness of you

arising and rising and surprising YOU

brings with it that beautiful opulence of well-tasted sunshine

integrated in the being of your being.

 

There’s no place it cannot spread now

that love blanket you’ve found tucked away

for it goes and grows and flows and flowers

in ways unknown

yet completely felt

in service of you

and reverence of ALL…

 

Who is this YOU that shines like the sun

in all its crystalline beauty and bigness?

Who is that Queen, that King

that rises first in your being,

TO your being

before being discovered

in the eyes of others?

WHO does this feel like it could be

even in those darker places of small enclosures

with tightening walls

and a sunless, reactive sky?

 

The you in there

holding court through storms

tumults and tirades…

THAT you calls forward

the way through it all

with a sanity yet to be fully known

yet one the soul recognizes

to be all its own.

 

This… this becomes that oversized bedsheet

meant to hold all corners without strain.

THIS is what it means

to be the container of love,

for yourself and selves…

spreading without tearing

becoming bigger in a soft expanse

of gentle holding and soothing balms.

 

The moment this begins

all power in your inner world

gathers and offers itself

as a reality beyond weapons

chaos

craziness

and a stable holding of a love

fit for all that is inside you

and all that you desire

and all that is to come…

 

 

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge and healer, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Popping Through Ceilings In Your “Roaring 20s”: Dedicated To ALL Awakening 20-somethings

by Kalayna Colibri

Roaring-Animated-Lion-Wallpaper

 

A feeling of wanting to reach up and touch the sky above you… better still, leap up into it, soaring into the heights you so feel are possible inside your heart. You get it… you get that something inside of you is needing air and is collapsing in on itself in a struggle to fit into a mold passed down by parents and the media and all sides of your culture. You don’t know quite what you or your life are really “supposed” to look and feel like yet, and many choices (though you may not see ALL of them in every moment) lay before you.

Many, many different boxes packed with possibilities are placed in all corners of your room, wanting you to unpack them and see what could be inside. So many questions, all too often answered by pre-conditioning, regarding what you should do with your life and why, where you should live and why, what makes your life worth living and why… what should be your values, your morals, your ways of expressing, your ways of measuring your net and self worth. But it’s all a big ceiling that wasn’t MEANT for you, sweet soul! Oh my god, it was imposed on you and with your permission and you’ve let it stay there for this long, and now you feel the press of your bigness wanting to pop it open… but society tells you that this is “depression”, or worse still, that what you’re feeling and experiencing IS life itself and nothing more or less… this compounds inside of you until you pop like a jack-in-the-box, taking risks, saying NO, finding your way, crawling through glass at times and yet still finding your way – often a “way” that could not be prescribed by those who came before you. No. It’s YOURS and it was always meant to BE yours…

Oh, the things you are feeling… the stuck places where you feel there’s no movement. The identity “crises” (that are really OPPORTUNITIES…) these are ALL trying to move your compass in a different direction. This is trying to wake you up and shake up your way of BEing in life, showing you with neon lights that this is NOT the way you HAVE TO choose. Your 20s are a shadowy time in some ways… there are many shadows lurking around you, reflections of old ways of doing things that somehow was passed on to you, but now is your chance to find your NO and break through your glass ceiling. You do have the power to burst through this… after all, the ceiling is there with YOUR permission anyways, as is ALL of your conditioning from culture, birth family, and those friends you’ve drawn to you.

Maybe you decided to go to college. Going back is an option, but maybe doesn’t feel like the real answer… so much is stirring inside you, like a baby lion reaching deep within for its first roar. You’re meant to claim whatever this roar is and needs to be. Pushing away from what ISN’T you can take this step sometimes. There may be mess, but you are so held in every moment and there is so much support coming at you from all sides, holding healing balms and salves… guiding you to lean into a deeper, bigger, more authentic YOU that works without bells and whistles and cavalcades. It is a YOU that calls subtly at first and then gets louder when you’re ready to hear it and feel it. It is a YOU that wants center stage at the center of your being but cannot take it without YOUR permission.

YOU are here because YOU are an epic, HUGE soul and that ceiling you’ve been surviving under is cracking… it’s your choice now, whether or not you want to take the road that is known, or the one less traveled by. Either way, know that there is no wrong or right, only choice, and that every single breath you take is just as sacred as the first and the last. You have decisions at your fingertips and magic in your palms. The world needs you and you need you, to step into the calling to be a new sort of King and Queen – completely sovereign in your own self, leading others into the heart territory you too long to go in, feeling how what you really, deeply, actually feel is what is meant to guide you and others into new places and aspects of space and “time” yet undiscovered or unremembered. You are being remembered by the universe just as you are remembering yourself. There is so much beyond that cap you’ve gone along with for this long. There is so much more love, respect and absolute wonder waiting for you, wanting you to find and feel it all, coming straight from within. It is a constant choice that requires no more than your renewed commitment to it in every moment – Awaken with the soul pull knocking at your heart-door, or go back to sleep…

Which are you choosing?

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge and healer, writer, and poetess. Find out more about the SoulFullHeart Way of Life at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

 

A Gatekeeper’s Plea

daemon 
By Leena Colibri

Could you love me…
if I showed you the scars,
the wings that aren’t pretty?

 

…maybe they never were…
but I can’t tell anymore.
I’ve forgotten what they look like.
I’ve forgotten how to see them.
I’ve forgotten that there is a mirror
and that that mirror can exist in an open human heart.

 

Can you see tears on my face?
I can’t feel them anymore.
My cheeks are numb.

 

Has life smacked me down or have I?
Has it all been as violent as it feels to me? Who is ultimately responsible? Am I? Are you? Is God?

 

Am I a product of my own faults? If I am, will I ever feel remorse? Could I ever feel remorse?

 

Did the war end or just ebb?
Why am I able to talk to you?
Why are you able to feel me?
Am I dying?

 

Did the soldier I was give way to an angel of peace?
Am I acting out of what was and is no longer?
Or is it all just beginning again and this is the calm before the storm?
I certainly don’t feel calm.
And I certainly do feel the storm…
In fact it is all I can think about.

 

Why can I suddenly see you?
Do you see me?
Are you pretending, as you have before?

 

Are you ready to believe that I am wounded?
Are you ready to believe that something beyond “me” is wounded?

 

All I am is questions,
a quester on an unending quest,
finding no answers, just more questions…
but for the first time,
I am asking them out loud and I am not afraid to let them fall from my lips and drift over to you, and into an unknown love that I no longer fully trust…
but want to…but want to again…as I did before.
As I did before the war. As I did before the battles I was partly responsible for starting.

 

Where am I?
How can you hear me?
Why do you even want to?

 

I could be your essence.
I could be that spark inside you.
I could be a part of all you are outside and inside your body.
I could be a part of everything in the world while also only a speck of dust on this great plane of existence.
I want to be with your essence…
I want to be with the you that could lead me Home.

 

Please…
take me Home.
 

*Find out more about connecting with your daemon/soul guardian here*
 
 
** Leena Colibri is an apprentice facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Please visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information.