Category: By Kalayna Solais

Centering Yourself In Non-Resonant Situations Guided Meditation Video

Published on by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Solais

With everything shifting lately in all of our lives in many ways, it feels good to offer this video and guided meditation I created to help centre through everything you might encounter and breathe through dissonant situations!
This video is a digestion of some pieces that have recently rumbled through in my own process in an effort to offer some of the important things I have been learning about navigating non-resonant situations and being a bridge for others yet having good boundaries and self-care too. It’s as much of an art form as it sounds like and the way you choose to navigate this for yourself will depend on your own parts and Metasoul aspects and what you are walking out personally.
About halfway through the video, I offer a guided meditation as a takeaway, something you can bring with you to work, social situations, etc where you may not always (if ever) feel ‘met’ where you are in the frequency you are most naturally at within yourself and your own process. This is meant to be a meditation to help you re-center, feel Divine love and guidance, and even to feel the presence of Star Family there with you, helping you ground back into yourself yet also offering next steps you may be able to soon take in order to help you move on from the dissonance around you and into more resonance in ALL areas of your life!
Much love! ❤
Oh, and btw, Raphael and Jelelle Awen will be offering their next online group transmission on Saturday Sept 14th: 4D Matrix/Karmic Healing Group Transmission — this group will help you feel through your own crucibles right now related to moving on from the 4D Matrix and healing some important karmic cycles/patterns that seem to keep playing out. Would love to see/feel you there! ❤

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Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

9/9 Cycle Completions & New Beginnings

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

by Kalayna Solais

No matter the portal that’s open or ‘time of year’, we get to look at ourselves, reflect on what we’ve walked out, and choose to see the next steps into who, where, and even WITH whom we would like to be. By this I mean, we get to choose if we’re ready to embrace the steps in front of us toward our next romantic soulmate bond, a new depth of soul community experience, new approaches to money/livelihood alchemy, and above all, new ways in which we can BE with ourselves.

Sometimes as we complete one cycle we begin another one right away. Endings breed beginnings, always, as life moves through us in these cycles. These can include karmic cycles where we’re being reflected the same themes over and over again even as we reach and go into the next layers of completing these patterns. These can include patterns of how we’ve been in relationships of all kinds too, romantic, friendship, even at work. Cycles exist everywhere and they include the many patterns we’ve lived out both consciously and unconsciously. It feels as if this 9/9 day is another significant opportunity to SEE patterns and where they’ve originated and we get to choose if/when we’re ready to deeply feel them.

I always get a sense especially of ‘karma’ around the number 9. It’s a number that is both an open and closed shape in one. It’s a number that to me shows a cycle that isn’t quite complete but may be in the process of completing. This is so true on a collective and personal level, where we’re feeling and seeing some pieces heating up but there IS a sense of completion coming too. Or at least more opportunities to become complete with something, some cycle or pattern, if we’re truly ready to show up for that.

9 reminds us somehow that we do have an array of choices before us, that we do get to find our power and act from there, but also that we need surrender too. We do have to show up at least halfway for life to truly respond to us and our deepest needs, but the real work sometimes is in the surrendering to life at the same time, and to a much bigger picture that we can’t possibly fathom just yet.

I feel this for myself as I continue to explore my alchemy and what I’ve drawn socially too. I continue to be challenged to feel my parts in their resistances and defenses but also see my progress and just how open my heart is these days, whereas even just a couple of years ago that would have been much harder to really see or feel as true.

In my process now, I can feel my parts in the midst of completing a cycle of taking things personally that has felt ENDLESS and so heartbreaking over and over again for many years. This has helped me feel my heart even more open and compassionate toward others and where they’re at right now that may not be in resonance with where I am, but that doesn’t take away from my care for them. This has drawn some interesting interactions, ranging from going deep very quickly to being kicked by parts of them that are in reaction. The reality of an open heart is that we can draw either extreme… at least until parts of us no longer need that reflection from life. This is where I’m going with this now, to feel why these extremes are what’s happening versus a more mellow and easily digestible experience of connection with others.

On this 9/9 day, whatever you may be feeling as a completion or a new beginning, there’s plenty of alchemy to go around in either direction and sometimes in both ways at the same time. And, as always, there is SO much love with you that wants to support you through all of it. ❤

My beloveds and I are ready to serve should you desire a session with us to help you find your next places to go on your own personal path: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

On September 14th, join Raphael and Jelelle Awen for their next group transmission: https://www.facebook.com/events/1340021326164133/ on 4D Matrix/Karmic Healing! This is another opportunity to feel your next steps in healing your own karmic cycles and pain. ❤

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Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

 

 

Holding Genuine Empathy & Love For Others

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

by Kalayna Solais

The conditioning is deep around what we’ve been taught real love and care is and looks like. It’s challenging to feel it in different ways, to take a deep look at how we’ve related to love and how we’ve been convinced we’re supposed to embody it.

So often what we think of as loving or caring can have more of a negative impact on others than a positive one. False apologies, empty promises, tugging and grabbing at others… these frequencies can be obvious or subtle. And in any case, we aren’t genuinely caring about our impact on others, only what parts of us want and are afraid they won’t get or look like on the outside. I so know this one from my own process too, and learning to see and feel even the subtle ways in which this happens is illuminating and invites you to shift these patterns for good.

This is tricky… and hard to feel too. It can be hard to look inward and challenge how we have been holding love and what it means to love another, whether in official ‘service of love’ or in everyday relationships. It’s amazing what it illuminates within though, which is so often an untouched inner reality of how we ourselves, and parts of us, have felt incredibly unworthy of real love, abandoned somehow, and in a void space that has never been filled by genuine self-love and the journey of unfolding that within.

So what does it look and feel like to actually care and love another person?

To me, it feels like giving space for another’s growth without tugging on them to join in on yours. It feels like inviting someone to share with you what they need and want, but not with a commitment from you to make it happen for them. It feels like the overflow of good inner-parenting, of relating to yourself and getting to know your own quirks and shadowy aspects and energies within you as well as your gifts and growth and flowing this energy to another to support their own inner-parenting to grow and blossom too. It feels like being willing to let go even when your heart really doesn’t want to.

It’s a lot to feel into these pieces and truth be told, I’m not sure any of us can truly master this skill of loving another in the purest way… though we can definitely care about this journey and continue to do the inner healing to help us get there. We and parts of us all have understandable investments in relationships of all kinds and hopes that they will last too. We all have desires and dreams and don’t really ever want to feel lonely (though really landing in the loneliness has so many gifts too)… we all have what we want to experience from others and in our lives in general. Yet love asks us to trust… to invest in the process yet divest of the outcome. To feel what we want most and understand that it won’t always come to us in ways we can control, and also, to see it all as a process that can only ever begin within. We really DO have to BEcome the love we want to draw on the outside and share with others too!

Above all, love wants us to remember that it is never against us or anybody else, though it can feel that way at times. It only ever wants us to experience more of it within so that we can share it with others. This flow of love is really all the ‘service of love’ is anyways, though it can be dressed up in many ways and be given many labels and is not always easy to truly embody for ourselves, let alone others.

Much love to you as you continue to experience your own journey into more and more REAL love, and the path of learning to embody love in the most authentic way possible. ❤

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Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Unanchor From Being In Pain: Message From A Local Oak Tree

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

by Kalayna Solais

I wanted to take in some nature the other day, to connect in with myself more after some pretty deep emotional detox waves moved through this last week. There were several huge tidal waves of emotional and existential pieces I hadn’t felt so deeply in a very long time and it turned out that much of the pain I was feeling had to do with several Metasoul brothers who were awakening, stirred up, and needed me. They embody themes of betrayal, nobody wanting to listen to them, inadequacy, comparison to others, not fitting in, disempowerment, banishment, etc. I’ve only felt two specific ‘brothers’ so far, but I feel like there are more.

The veil being so thin right now seems to of course bring with it more opportunities to reconcile other lifetimes. I’ve even recently felt an ‘abusive husband’ archetype in my own Metasoul and that was a huge one to deeply let in and feel. This reminds me that during these times of the veil being quite thin, there are these opportunities to feel deep-seated soul themes that still need our hearts to hold them and our Divine love connection to help forgive and heal them. These darker themes can’t emerge within us unless we are ready for them to, so I always take this as a reflection of my progress even though it may feel absolutely crazy-making to walk out.

It’s also SO important to actually go into and feel these lifetimes when they do come forward, because it does help us understand WHY these themes are so alive today not only inside of us but inside of so many others who express/embody them, usually unconsciously, in different ways.

While connecting within and with nature today, I felt to sit underneath a beautiful, wise oak tree. I touched her trunk, connecting with my heart, wondering about sitting below her and leaning in for a while. The immediate warmth I felt was so inviting that I did just that. I felt rest and safety as I sat down in the tall grass and leaned into her sturdiness. I consciously reminded my parts and my Metasoul aspects to let in the love exchange.

beacon hill 1

The oak tree told me,

“It’s time to un-anchor from being in pain”.

I felt this message not just for me but for a collective that seems to be moving through so much right now and always.

I could feel the truth of how this has been an undercurrent throughout my process over the years and how it’s steadily and surely been healing. I feel how this is the invitation for everyone who consciously chooses to keep going inward to clean house, to refine and redefine what it means to love yourself and also to love and serve others. We get to find our own finesse with our ongoing process, to be able to let in as much arising joy as we do arising woundedness. It does feel SO critical that we ALL begin to consciously hold our processes this way if we aren’t already!

There is definitely a balance between the transcendence or bypassing of soul and heart pain and the staying anchored in it.

We get to create a NEW ‘normal’. A new baseline frequency and sense of self, life, and how love moves within us. This is a very personal journey for each of us and for each part of us along with each Metasoul Aspect too. ❤

My beloveds and I are passionate about not just doing this within but supporting your own journey, should you feel resonant with what we offer! More info here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

beacon hill 2

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Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Loving UP Your Body & Energy In Every Way

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

By Kalayna Solais

I don’t often treat myself to this kind of luxurious experience but oh, am I GRATEFUL that I did!

These are ‘before and after’ pics of my salon experience today. In an awesome synchronicity, Jelelle Awen brought this all-natural salon back to my attention the other day. She also said she found out there was a hair dresser there that specializes in cutting curly hair. I think I ended up booking an appointment that night, even though I wasn’t totally sure the money would work out comfortably.

My experience though was more than just a hair cut. The young woman who did my hair had a sweet porosity herself and that was wonderful to connect with. Also, I could feel this appointment as an important piece of my personal transition into the new… A new sense of self love and care that goes well beyond ‘not sure if I have the money for it’ sort of anxiety that parts of me can have sometimes.

I’ve INvested so much of myself into my personal INNER process, that it was time to let in a desire for refreshed and healthier hair as a way to take care of and treasure my own unique feminine beauty. I must confess, I also have a desire for a facial. A potentially expensive one. And also a mani-pedi. And also, I’m going to be changing my hair colour!

I’m just letting my desires in again after a bit of a hiatus of being able to feel them. This is one expression of what I want for myself and my parts and my life. Of course there are also many more expressions and this is simply an outward one.

I honestly haven’t focused on the ‘outside’ of me in so long aside from the occasional body image pieces that pop up. However, even that is moving with a renewed relationship to food and fasting and already feeling better, a bit lighter, as if there is simply more air and light too coming in. Also, a new relationship to the way I clothe my body is emerging and that is exciting and interesting to feel happening.

It feels like every aspect of self care, especially if it can be held with genuine love and not an activated Inner Punisher, is a part of the Light Body activation experience. Each step we take, each dollar we ‘spend’, is all a part of the bigger picture of where our bodies are ascending to IF we can align the intention with a purifying sense of self love and empowerment that no longer has undertones of harshness, control, or anxiety towards self or life.

It is a journey to get there. And I am still on the journey in some ways. But, every wave of it is worth diving deeply into… to come out the other side transformed in ways you hadn’t expected. ❤️

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Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

From Those Who Watch Over Us: A Poem

Published on by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Solais

It’s okay if you don’t remember.
We aren’t going to leave you.

It’s okay if you don’t know.

There’s not much to know, just to experience over and over again until experience turns into the page love is written on, not the words of love themselves.

It’s okay if you don’t know who you are.

We don’t care how many carousels you ride, how many spins you take, you will still have your essence in the end.

In the end, the only path that matters, is the path you chose in every moment. And no… we don’t care how you were or weren’t, just how your experiments end. The inconclusive conclusions you come to along your way back to love.

Love.

The only Ground Zero.

The only ground from where you rose, and the only ground on which you fall.
The place where seeds are scattered, and growth happens no matter what.
Yes. All else is an illusion.

But…

It’s the illusion you need.

That holographic something isn’t nothing. It’s the most important thing right now right now and right now.

So… walk, run, fly, dream, make love, make war, make peace, get messy, clean up, climb up, and fall down.

Your sacredness won’t break, for it is not porcelain.

Your birthright to live into all realities remains intact.

Here we sit.
Here we watch. Here we wait for you to remember that the path is love, the game is love, and the light, dark, hard, easy stories are the love you are learning and remembering that you are.

❤️

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Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Current Activations Help Us See, Feel, Heal Our Deep 3D/4D Matrix Conditioning

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

by Kalayna Solais

We have grown up in a 3D society that encourages us to stay feeling full, ‘fat’ and flat.

Over-stimulated and underfelt are the many parts of us who continue to show up in life and relationships to ingest and then digest experiences, trauma, and what we’ve been told is ‘food’ too.

We’ve been taught that compassion is only a sidedish to being empathic rather than the main course if we’re encouraged to be empathic at all growing up or to ask for others to feel us… which happens in 4D consciousness too, where being an ’empath’ is often worn as a millstone around our necks instead of deeply inhabited and responded to.

Feeling ourselves in a heart-open way, let alone feeling others, is not encouraged and is instead told to be buried and covered over by the heavy cement of our education systems, our food industries, mainstream ‘medicine’, our consumption of ‘entertainment’ and even ‘spirituality’ itself.

Parts of us have taken on the role of shaming and shunning what is new and different, what isn’t mainstream, as it blooms inside of us and around us. This is typically an Inner Punisher part, yet other parts of you can be wrapped in this too and Metasoul aspects who are afraid to feel themselves, to digest the trauma of their timelines. In this way, this very much applies to 4D consciousness as well as 3D, as there are still matrices in place, rules to follow, ideas that are more acceptable than others, and ultimately still some expectations of how it all should be and look like.

Trauma should be ‘gotten rid of as quickly as possible’ instead of steadily and heartfully investigated and loved…. this is a popular one in 4D and a meme that relates to all of this deeply seated conditioning inside. This has been detrimental to our growth and our possibilities for deepening self-love and respect as well, as parts of us then go back into hiding where they continue to feel unfelt, unheard, and ultimately unloved…

To unseat these pieces, we have to take the space to feel ourselves with deep honesty… this is the hard part, as we haven’t been shown how to do this. You may struggle with taking time for yourself due to a busy lifestyle that you’ve needed for a phase or a relationship that feels rumbly enough already. I myself have been in a phase of more busyness than normal with exploring different ‘jobs’ and a new social world too. This is what’s reflecting all of these pieces to me and is something I’m going into in my soul… what have been the over-attachments in ME that have kept parts of me reeling and spinning in conditioning that simply doesn’t fit them anymore? What timelines are my Metasoul aspects still living in that are being reflected now, where they have perpetuated this conditioning in their own ways or been victims to it?

There’s so much to glean from all of this inner exploration with parts of you and in your soul too, should the timing feel right to really go into it and INvestigate it all… you can find out more about ‘parts’ and ‘Metasoul aspects’ here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts

I really feel we are ALL being encouraged to SEE all of this as well as to feel it. To let the light activations coming in help it all become illuminated for us and with us, to collaborate with us individually on new ways to approach life and love… especially our sense of self-love, from which all capacity to love others stems. We CAN learn to love and appreciate the conditioning we’ve signed up for while also moving through it into something new.

Much love to you, wherever you are on your own journey with this and so much more… 

~

Join Raphael and Jelelle Awen on September 14th for a 4D Matrix Healing Group Transmission! More details here: https://www.facebook.com/events/1340021326164133/

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Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Aliveness And Love In Feeling It ALL

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

by Kalayna Solais

As I look out at the horizon, the abundance of natural gifts around me, I feel the vastness of my own future and the potential for all in this human family.

I feel the realness of our struggles. The ways in which we try to bypass but not feel. The feelings that we’d rather not have to experience or relive in order to grow. The past which we would rather forget about than realize parts of us are still living in.

Our true sense of presence is not from obscuring or falsifying our memories of life experiences from this or any lifetime, but from feeling the parts of us and Metasoul aspects still resonating and literally living in these timelines and stories, that still feel the pain we thought we’d healed by now, that still bring all of these feelings of living in these situations into where and who we are now.

As I breathe in and out, feeling my body fill up with prana and light energies, feeling my parts and Metasouls who are vibrating in this and any moment, I feel how alive FEELING makes me. How distinctive this love for myself that grows with each process is from any ‘love’ I’ve been taught or talked at about. I feel this love expanding into the horizon I take in and breathe in. Echoed back by nature, shared with my beloveds, offered to anyone who is ready to take it in and let it support their own journeys.

The love of this world far outweighs the severity of the turmoil… Holds space for it… And IS bringing it into something new, with all of the permission we can give it to do so starting from deep within each of us.

Much love! ❤️

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Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Exploring ‘Dissonance’ To Land In More ‘Resonance’ From The Inside Out

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

By Kalayna Solais

‘Dimensional Dissonance’ is a very real thing… it’s the feeling of not being able to quite be who you are in your heart and soul when you’re on an awakening journey and you’ve found yourself surrounded by others who aren’t there yet. It’s quite the opposite of being in ‘Dimensional Resonance’ which you can experience with soul family/tribe as you’re all working within in similar ways and with processes that are are connected and parallel.

The intimacy that’s possible with resonance is simply not as possible with dissonance… the sense of knowing and being known, seeing and being seen, and the give and take of deep relationships where in one moment you are taking the space because you need to be felt and in others you are offering the space to feel your beloveds, are all pieces that can happen with resonant soul and heart relationships. The sense of having to ‘work’ to make things ‘ok’ isn’t there any longer because it doesn’t need to be.

You and your closest beloveds live in the same ‘dimension’, let alone reality. While with those who you don’t share this with, it can feel like you’re coming from another country, speaking a foreign language, and the efforts to bridge across these dimensional border lines may be fluid in moments and challenging in others to the point where it stops being self-loving and your authentic compassionDiss for others is more difficult to access too.

I’ve been in a sort of 3D ‘experiment’ for a few weeks now. This has meant inhabiting other sorts of 3D jobs more ‘in-person’ based than online based. I’ve been teaching ESL online for several years now and that was fine while living abroad but now that I’m back in my home country and feeling a new solidity within my heart and soul and personal process, I’ve felt the call and guidance to reach out and see what connections can be made with others through more ‘social’ work experiences. It’s been a journey of feeling what my own personal ‘bridge-builder’ inside of me can look and feel like.

This has been quite humbling, to say the least. I am not doing this to be evangelistic in any way about the work I do and offer, but instead to be invitational through the vulnerability of sharing pieces of what my own process is right now and seeing in which ways it feels ok to be ‘me’ even with those I’m just meeting for the first time. This is essentially how I would be with anyone I’m close to, so why compartmentalize, especially when I would rather that others get to know the real me and that I might get to know them in a real way too.

Sometimes the ‘dimensional dissonance’ level is more intense than at other times, yet the opportunities I’m getting to ultimately feel myself, my parts, and my own process through this whole phase are what make it all worth it. This, it feels like, is the gift of it all… that even though trying to bridge into the thickness and density of 3D consciousness can be so very challenging and in some ways deeply tiring too, it’s another mirror to look into and another opportunity to open my heart as much as possible, expanding into the compassion I’m capable of, even though parts of me also feel frustrated at times.

As real as the dissonance around us sometimes is, the more of that we can feel lives inside of us between parts of us, the more inner resonance there will eventually be and the more resonance we inevitably draw and appreciate too on the outside. Inner resonance cannot be taken away from us, yet we do need it to be supported by our relationships and living situation too. Being able to come home to myself, to digest my experiences with those I’m closest to, has become even more critical for me and I feel it’s becoming more critical for others too. Why settle for dissonance when the resonance you want even MORE is available to you at any time, especially as you make space for it within. ❤

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Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Healing The ‘Black Sheep’ Archetype

Published on by Kasha Rosa5 Comments

by Kalayna Solais

When you’re a child, you start to learn right away what is expected of you. You’re meeting expectations of when to start talking, walking, even behaving more maturely, whatever definition of ‘mature’ you’ve been taught. You learn, then, about what makes you feel like you’re on track with this and what doesn’t and you take in the impact of that.

As you get older and start to awaken more to your soul but also what your heart really feels and wants, the pain starts to set in… the pain of feeling like you don’t belong and maybe never have. A feeling like you simply cannot ‘win’ no matter what you do or don’t do. Parts of you form to deal with this and find a way to be in the world but you still can’t reconcile your differences; those aspects of who you are that seem to set you apart from everyone else.

In some cases, you may start becoming ‘therapized’ as the only way that your 3D-conditioned parents or authority figures feel they can ‘help’ you. You may be put on medication that numbs and dulls your natural ability to FEEL. Even the anxiety and depression you’ve experienced, which is held by parts of you that are hurting and also feeling on their radar a sense that they really aren’t safe in this conditioning and aren’t being loved the way they need and deserve to be.

You now see yourself as the ‘black sheep’ of the family but also of the culture you’ve been raised in. You may even feel this with your friends or co-workers. I know I have.

In my recent process, I was working with a part of me that always felt she was the ‘black sheep’. We had to go into a scene together where she could line-up her birth family members and feel the lingering judgements and criticisms, the messages of ‘you’ll never make it on your own’ which may not have been directly said but were energized.

Together, we could start to feel their Higher Selves in the room too, and their Higher Selves offered that this wasn’t actually about what it seemed to be about… it wasn’t about me or this part of me being a ‘failure’ (though in a 3D sense it’d be pretty easy to see it that way). It was actually about a wonder they have at the conditioning I’ve been able to say ‘no’ to, the risks I’ve said ‘yes’ to and the trust I now have more and more in my life, even the challenges that sometimes feel like mountains to climb.

In this, I found compassion for them even though I still hold a boundary.

In this, I found a way to truly see and honour myself and my own journey as well as seeing the sacredness of their own.

In this, I could feel how this theme of ‘not belonging’ and being looked down on somehow has played out in all of my relationships in one way or another, even with my soul family and my recent marriage too.

And, in this, I could feel how just about every single one of us who has been on an awakening and healing journey has felt like some form of the ‘black sheep’ and played out this theme countless times, often with angst and restlessness and even suicidal feelings.

On the other side of this process, I could bring this part of me into a new form other than the ‘black sheep’. She was able to shake off the black and the sheep suit came off too. She turned into a young lioness, full of power and presence, yet with heart and vulnerability. She is finding a new home inside of me where she can truly belong and be seen and loved for who she is, even in those times where she is being shown something not-so-easy to see or feel about herself.

You’ve been taught to look outside of you for validation and even for connection to Divine love.

You’ve been conditioned to believe that you’re always supposed to ‘achieve’ and ‘succeed’ even though the goalposts keep moving. This happens in 3D and also 4D in different spiritual groups too where your ‘black sheep’ feelings can become amplified instead of felt deeply, often in the form of ‘tough love’ which is really just outright abuse.

The feelings of not-belonging can be healed as the parts of you begin to unify, one by one, with each other and with you.

Love is the glue that brings your heart and soul back together again to wholeness within that can no longer be severed. Love is the juice that catalyzes the transformation from within. Yours is the love your lost and world-weary parts most need to feel, to remove their own sheep suits… for they were never meant to be ‘sheep’.

They were meant to be ‘lions’.

Much love! ❤

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Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.