Tag: emotional healing

Questing With Our Questions Into the Quantum

Published on by Raphael Awen3 Comments

By Raphael Awen

In a quantum world of infinite possibilities, why is that we find ourselves all too often seemingly locked into one possibility? Why does that one possibility seem to persist ‘ad infinitum’ – to infinity, without end, with little hope of desired change?

How did infinite possibility get swapped out for infinite impossibility?

Could it be that this has everything to do with parts of ourselves who have so mastered the art of creating the world they actually want, albeit a small, narrow and safe world, while other parts of you so ache to break free of this pattern persistence in your life?

Has one powerful part of your being scripted your life with a scripture of its own, and you are just now awakening to it; through your feelings of confinement, through your desire to break your unquestioning allegiance to this scripture; through your desire to awaken from what feels like the bad dream that another part of you feels your life has become? And to let the chips fall where they may?

And what would you propose to alter this trajectory that you call your life? And which part of you would be in charge of alterations?

Maybe some kind of a more powerful self help kind of agenda is needed, where a campaign of mandating a new world order for yourself is the order of the day? Maybe a trip to the bookstore is in order?

Is there even enough gas in the tank to carry this whole agenda forward? And if there was plenty of gas in the tank, do you actually want to undertake that initiative and see it through to its desired end? Is there another part of you who could care less about this new initiative, and even seek to sabotage it?

If you made it through the gauntlet of all these questions, there’s still more questions. What would the desired end game even be, after you arrived at your envisioned new world, assuming you’d even know when you had in fact arrived there? Being free of an unwanted limiting dynamic in your life is great, but is that enough of a picture of a new life?

If you really did your homework and visualized what your ‘there’ would look and feel like, then the question comes about what would you do following your arrival at this desired place, once your ached and longed for bliss becomes your everyday normalized waking reality?

Maybe, a part of you, unbeknownst to the you that you think of as you has thought through all of these questions quite deeply and silently come to the conclusion that it’s just not worth the effort. Maybe this part of you reasons that a better or best life, somehow without fail, becomes normalized, taken for granted, neglected, and ends up in unfulfillment. Why not settle then for the life we have now, rather than reach for great heights, the great heights of which only to make the fall into despair that much more painful?

I believe life and love are asking us to feel all of these questions that have gone on in us somewhere, but haven’t been made conscious. We haven’t yet consciously been introduced to the parts of us who have scripted and created the life we are presently living, and then from there gone on to dream, negotiate and script a new reality based in the divine play of infinite arising possibility.

Only as we take up this deep quest consciously, with a higher self embodiment of us leading the way and playing host to all the parts of us who have been in conflict, can we sanely take our next steps into life and love, or step out of bed in the morning.

My world wants to be recreated into ongoing recreation – play, where the end game is an ever changing game without limits, where awe, reverence and wonder is a never ending arising reality, only to be overshadowed by one greater.

I believe; even more than believe, I FEEL the Divine, in its curiosity is wanting to create and play this game through you and I, inseparably with itself. We have been invited. The invitation is sitting on our desk.

If you are feeling and conceiving such a possibility, you are like the man Jesus spoke of who happened upon a field that contained a hidden pearl of great price, who went out and sold all that he had to then go and purchase that field.

The field is the quantum field of divine play in infinite possibilities! The field is your life. What are you ready to sell to raise the funds to redeem your life from the one possibility it has slipped into to restore it to the infinite possibilities that you ARE?

Raphael Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.Com/sessions

I’d love to help you find and take your next steps into the infinite possibilities of your life. I can’t think of anything more rewarding. Please check out my sessions link above and be in touch when you’re ready.

Photo courtesy of https://unsplash.com/@federize

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Journey To Feeling Genuinely Blessed

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

By Kalayna Solais

Feeling quite blessed and surrendered this morning…

If you’d known me personally even just a year ago, you’d probably be amazed that I can get to a place of really feeling this deeply… so much restlessness, so much pushing and pressing, and I’ve had to love it all from roots to wings.

The process of learning to land more and more in love, especially within, is no joke at all. It’s nothing that can really be expedited. This over-arching process of Ascension certainly takes the time it takes, doesn’t it? It reminds me yet again that the destination isn’t the goal, it’s the journey itself. And the journey, for me, as been continually dropping into feeling, to get to know my parts and my Metasoul deeper, to have a more fulfilling and enriching relationship with the Divine that can only come from taking conscious steps and making choices that do actually serve your budding self-love and desire to love others more and with more compassion. For that is where the Divine can be the most deeply felt and experienced, as well as invited IN.

So why in this particular moment do I feel blessed and surrendered?

It’s not like I have “all my ducks in a row” right now. It’s not like, in the most typical 3D terms, I have the “perfect life”. It’s not like I don’t also have some rounds of sadness move in and out of my field as my ache to share my space and my heart with others and eventually a mate continues to live inside of me.

But… what I do have, I have in spades. I have growing self-love. I have a community I’ve earned my way to drawing and being a part of. I have more resonance around me than ever before, geographically, in my ‘jobs’, in all of my relationships that I choose to keep close to me. I get to live with so much resonance that parts of me sometimes resist or create problems because they are so used to living with a baseline of “something is always wrong or about to go wrong”. This was a survival instinct, actually, that I don’t need anymore. And that is still very much landing in my heart AND soul!

I’m sharing all of this because it’s a message of what’s possible for you, too. For you and those parts of you who ache and long and sometimes fight to stay afloat in the world you’re living in. For those unbelievably courageous, beautiful parts of you that sometimes feel the opposite because that’s how much they have to shrink in order to fit into a life, a job, a relationship, that doesn’t support their bigness and especially YOUR bigness.

I’m also sharing this because it helps me really land in what I’ve earned, what I’ve done all of this inner work for, and to embrace the overflow of it all that wants so much to share this inner abundance with others. I can’t hoard it away, nor am I meant to. Nor are you meant to, when you feel blessed too… 🙂 So much pain and fear and angst sometimes is the default of what you share, perhaps. And to be in a place in your life but more importantly in your very BEing where this isn’t what is overflowing from you anymore is the invitation, always. No matter how many tough choices you may have to make along the way. The support and validation are waiting in the wings for you to go there and the healing is too.

I’m available for 1:1, 90min sessions for women of all ages if you feel the need for more support for your own next choice points and to start feeling your own parts/Metasoul aspects and their hard work, their pain, their desires too: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

~

Photo taken on beautiful Salt Spring Island… another geography I feel incredibly blessed to have access to! ❤

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Navigating The Confluence Of Change

Published on by Gabriel HeartmanLeave a comment
Just now recovering from one of the worst ‘flus’ in a long time. This tends to occur for me when going through lots of life changes at once. I have also recognized that it was at the confluence of the last 9 days, 9 months, and 9 years. Very catalytic and life-changing cycles all ending at one point. BOOOSH!!
 
It felt like I got hit by a Mack truck with symptoms all over the map, head to toe (including the teeth…a part of me needs to say.) I could feel how much my poor body has held this life and clearly in other lives. I have become more aware of it but this particular convergence really highlighted it.
 
I have come across so much darkness and suffering in myself and my soul over these cycles. I have also found more light & love than I ever expected to be privy to in one lifetime. This can be a challenge for the body to integrate in such a short period of time. I experienced myself differently during the past SFH Equinox gathering in a way that I haven’t fully assimilated yet. This brings up its own shadow/fear/excitement response. It needs to come up if I am going to continue to serve Love those I am meant to serve.
 
I saw my power. My gift. My desire to serve others, crossing territory that, in some ways, my soul has spent a millennia in. I felt the uniqueness of myself as a man, however I choose to define that. I have a sacred role. Not out of a duty but as a passion to create bridges into the New. I felt a growing closeness to and love for my feminine that continues to blossom everyday. I don’t know how I could do this without her.
 
I found a feminine star seed that I am just starting to tap into that I feel as a priceless gift to bestow upon me when the time is ripe. There are codes floating all around waiting for their landing pad. This is an exciting new frontier for all of me. The coming together of the Dark codes and the Light codes. They all have a role to play within us.
 
I am releasing a lot of my past relationship with Kalayna which has been a big catalyst for this rumble. So many gifts that I have been mining from the letting go. One being a revived relationship with my inner teenager and feeling his energetic bind with Mom that needed more purging.
 
On the physical level, a big detox of all the drugs, alcohol, and smoke that I consumed up until I started this journey 9 years ago.
 
Thanks for taking this in with me. I needed to unpack this a bit for myself and yet I felt to share as it may serve in its own way. It is both a personal chronicling and a shared experience.
 
We are all in a time of great change. How we are with those changes greatly influence how we move through them and where we land on the other side.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Moving From Care-taking to Care-giving

Published on by Raphael Awen2 Comments

By Raphael Awen

After raising or changing your frequency, you find and feel old energies present in your relationships that reflect the old you; the old you that doesn’t exist anymore, at least not in the same way, or to the same degree.

A natural tendency is to caretake those friends or family members rather than honestly and integrously bringing your truth, seeing them as kind of ‘grandfathered in’ into your life. Trouble is, grandpa’s dying or maybe even long gone, but you’re stuck with all of his unsorted stuff.

I don’t know of a greater or more effective cap on our growth than this deep rooted conditioning of caretaking.

Seeing to the core of this tendency, we see that the withhold of our truth is actually a withhold of our love; albeit in the name of love. A part of us is defensively caretaking the friend or family member out of fear of loss, out of personal need, rather than heart overflow.

This is why it’s called caretaking – it’s very much ‘on the take’. It’s living out of the absence and lack of love. It’s begging and fighting over scraps and crumbs.

Integrity asks us to be integrated, as in coming from one place, not two. This means purity; of one substance. Here, and only here, as well as magically here, the love that we truly give our selves (parts of us) is the same love; the same in character and kind that we have to give others. Nothing needs to be hidden. Nothing needs to be worked on to preserve the relationship. Relating is real and only real. Real has an energy of its own where the tendency to caretake naturally falls away and diminishes more and more as we integrate.

What truth of yours is wanting to come out into your relationships? What truth have you been disintegrously withholding in the name (and name only) of love? What manifestations of growth is a part of you afraid of while holding onto this shrinking pattern? What stress that is sourced in this hiding have you normalized? What would it feel like to bring your truth?

*****

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Honouring And Loving Your Personal Journey

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

By Kalayna Solais

Holding your own beauty

your own worth

your own sexiness

your own aliveness…

…means no one can take it away from you.

Not that they ever could without parts of you letting them, and in some cases, asking for them to.

Not that anyone ever could… unless they themselves felt less about themselves too.

To hold yourself with humility

sensing where you have left to grow

is the most beautiful thing imaginable

and the highest place you can then look inward from.

No one can take you away from you

unless you lean into their void

instead of the you that’s filling UP…

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Reflections From Our Interconnections: A Poem

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

by Kalayna Solais

Digging IN
my heart remembers
what it only can with you.
And what’s always true
is the plan of living
and the exquisite pain
of letting in
while also letting go.

Ecstatically
the heart opens and closes again
echoing thoughts and words within
the pulse of beating hearts
and timelines crossing timelines.

Instinctually
the forbidden mind
starts to mine
the experience of the heart
and integration of lined-up soul pieces
that flow and flee and double-back
into the next full circle
of healing miracles
within.

Reflections, ALL
move inside the current being
now seeing
what couldn’t be seen without them
moving into the heart space and out again
leaving me with more gain
than loss.

No matter the next
and next
and next
reflections and reactions and reactivations
the following places
pace in a dance
that races then recedes
in a way wild
uncontrolled
and absolutely
ALIVE.

~

Art by Rassouli

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Becoming The Author Of Your Own Story

Published on by Raphael Awen4 Comments

By Raphael Awen

When you are no longer controlled by outside forces, you are the author, possessing the author-ity for what your life is about.

Becoming the Sovereign of your own life in this way is a scary proposition as it leaves us completely responsible for own lives, leaving us the challenge of owning all of our lives – all that’s in our lives, and all of our lifetimes.

There’s no one to blame. There’s no circumstance to point the finger at; no lot in life, that doesn’t originate in you.

The idea of having whatever you want is only novel and exciting until you realize that’s what actually been going on this whole time. The challenge is coming to terms with your authorship, deciding the story that you actually want; deciding and negotiating between the parts of you that want different things.

You are not your circumstances. You are not your relationships. You are not your job. You are not your bank balance. You are not even your health. You created all of that, but you are not that.

You are the creator.

Maybe like me, you set your sights on healing your anxiety or your depression. You did that, only to realize this was much to small a goal for the Sovereign you actually are. No longer being in the depths of anxiety or depression is nice, but that alone can’t fill the expansive sails of your being.

You are called to experience yourself in continual curiosity and childlike wonder and learning. You are ever called to more.

What does your more look like? What is wanting to mature and manifest in your life, in your world, in your magical story?

What have parts of you been afraid of, in order to enact the changes that you know are ripening in your story?

How can you lovingly reconcile and negotiate these inner differences?

*****

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

The Door To Our Inner Garden

Published on by Raphael Awen2 Comments

By Raphael Awen

And for how long we longed after some door external to us to find our magic, our light, our sparkle, when the door was in our own inner garden all along. 

If this is true, then what seems to predispose us all to look outward or to an other?

We have been convinced that the self is ‘selfish,’ an inherently bad word and a very bad thing, when in truth until you become truly and deeply selfish, youcan in no wise inherit the kingdom of God, for this kingdom and queendom is inside you.

To be fully selfish is to do and be what brings you the fullest and deepest pleasure. How could that not be to the fullest and deepest pleasure of all of life and every living thing around you.

Shortchanging yourself is shortchanging the world and everyone around you. 

Your problem isn’t that you are self centred, it is that you are not centred in yourself enough to the true degree and depths of that which you really are and with what you really want. 

Give up the pretence that you have no self-interest for when in fact, as a self, that is all you have.

Show me your most noble self-less act, and then show me how you are not deriving a personal return from it. 

Until we reconcile this inside of ourselves, the door to our own inner garden of our magic remains sealed.

How could it be any different?

*****

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Energy Update: Geostorms Heighten Emotional/Spiritual/Physical States

Published on by Jelelle Awen3 Comments

By Jelelle Awen

For the third day in a row (September 2), Gaia has been inside a stream of high speed solar wind coming from a ‘hole to make us whole’ on the sun’s surface. Episodes of G2-class storming have brought in Auroras/Northern Lights in the U.S. as far south as Wisconsin, Michigan, and Montana. The wind speeds have been hovering around 700 km/sec during these last three days as well, with the ‘average’ being in the 300 km/sec range, according to spaceweather.com.

These kinds of speeds are difficult for us to even comprehend and, sometimes, the connection to these ‘far off’ cosmic events can feel distant from our everyday lives. I have been guided to offer a bridge to these celestial occurrences to what you might be experiencing on emotional/physical/mental/spiritual levels. This bridge allows us to feel how our inner cosmos is inherently connected to the outer cosmos….the Universe lives inside of our every cell…..As above, so below.

August was a HIGHLY catalytic month of energies with Lion’s Gate providing a ‘direct line’ to higher frequencies of soul clarity, higher dimensional aspect embodiment/connection, activation of Ascension chakras and our light bodies. There was a sense of revelation and unveiling of your higher timeline life and self. There were tastes of this ‘reality’ coming through in new synchs, connections inner and outer, and opportunities. Along with this, there were realizations of where you are now, what worlds you are navigating between, and what your transition may look and feel like into your higher timeline.

Moving now into September and with these SOULar winds, there is a feeling sense of taking action and making choices based on that higher timeline. Making the outer choices unfolds from the inner realities shifting. Making the CHOICE to change unfolds organically as you feel inside a dethawing from 3D birth family conditioning, unplugging from the 3D/Lower 4D Matrix, healing from karmic bind cycles that keep you looping in suffering and understanding/exploring bleed-throughs from other timelines.

Feeling through these things can be quite challenging at times. Feelings of not wanting to be here anymore, giving up, hopelessnesses, distrust/mistrust, isolation/loneliness, just FEAR can come up as parts of you let go of the previous configurations. Working with and connecting to these parts of you directly and consciously allows space to be held WITH them in this process. If you just ‘become’ their feelings of despair and loneliness, it can quite overwhelming. There is no one ‘home’ then to keep these parts of you company as they let go of the only safety lines they’ve ever known (no matter how toxic these ‘safety lines’ are, especially in the form of relationships.)

Everything is being heightened with these energies coming in now in 2019…preparing us to move into a higher frequency experience of ourselves and all of life in 2020. Feelings that have been more in shadow, subconscious, or deemed not ‘socially acceptable’ such as rage, shame, resentment are coming UP now to be felt, embraced, and to ultimately allow for understanding the reasons WHY they are there. All feelings and emotional states exist for a reason inside of us. They are the result of wounding from traumas experienced this life and other lifetimes.

As feeling and emotional states are being heightened, also are karmic frequencies and traumas from other timelines/lifetimes (especially those in more 4D frequencies.) Timelines such as Atlantis and Lemuria during the Fall; ‘Ancient Egypt’; Avalon/Camelot; the Essences, etc. are all coming through to be felt and healed by us. Connecting directly with the Metasoul aspect/fragment that is experiencing these timelines and their pain helps to move it, heal it. Differentiating what you are experiencing that is actually coming from another timeline can be really helpful.

Our physical bodies are feeling the impact too, as what is denser in our cellular memory, in our ‘diets/ways of life’ are wanting to be detoxed out through self loving practices. This may be causing more physical discomfort for you, flare up/heightening of chronic conditions in your body. Our bodies are wanting to unanchor too from the denser conditionings of 3D, from digesting toxic energies in our foods. Their higher timeline expression is as a vital, healthy, moving into immortality light bodies, serving as our vibrant merkabahs, providing multidimensional travel.

My 33 Day series called Deepen offers teachings and guided meditations to meet parts of your 3D self, work with your Ascension chakras and light body, and also your Gatekeeper, who opens up access to your Metasoul and timelines/lifetimes that need your love and integration. https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLNmrHdaQSAvLiLpw1qSOmQE-tsqhGSAD3

These recent SOULar winds invite ongoing digestion, detox, and eventually action. They remind you of the power of your own capacity to gust and to storm….even as your stillness center is watered too by loving energies available from the Divine Mother. You can express full range of your BEing as you love, acknowledge, and integrate ALL aspects of yourself in this Now and ongoingly.

Join Raphael and I next Saturday, September 14th for our monthly group transmission over zoom, starting at 10:00am PDT. We will teach about and guide you in a meditative space in which you can connect to your Gatekeeper aspect, visit the Lower 4D Matrix, begin the process of unplugging from it, and learn how to open up portals to other lifetimes/timelines that need karmic healing. More info to join us for a $15 CAD donation here: https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/product-page/6-4d-matrix-karmic-healing-group-transmission-jelelle-and-raphael-awen

Much love,

Jelelle

Jelelle Awen is Co-Creator/Teacher/Group Facilitator/Ambassador of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about 1:1 individual sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, virtual group transmissions, four day gatherings in Victoria, BC, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

Photo taken by Mike White on September 1, 2019 @ Port Hills, Christchurch, New Zealand

Falling IN Love

Published on by Raianna Shai1 Comment

Photo by Everton Vila on Unsplash

By Raianna Shai

In the past few weeks I have been trying to find the space and time to write a blog post, finding that I have struggled to “force” something profound and meaningful out of me when sometimes just living is as profound as you need to be in any moment. I have so much desire to serve love to others and to share what I learn on my awakening journey. Even now, I have many ideas of what I could write about but the words aren’t flowing as easily as they have in the past.

So as I sit here with an open heart, energy and time, I decided just to write about where I am currently in my life. That is what’s most authentic and flows from my heart with ease.

Right now I am falling in love. With myself, with other, with my life and family. I am falling in love inside and outside. I am growing and changing and facing my fears as much as I possibly can to continue letting in all of this love.

My inner process has been focused on a feminine and masculine part of me who are also learning to fall in love. They both have desires, needs, boundaries and fears. My feminine part, who I am calling Shai, is emotional and passionate and a true romantic at heart. My masculine part, named Michael, is discerning, intelligent and has a gift of holding 3D tasks. Together, they are balanced and full of love. Apart, they are opposite forces working against one another creating fear, anxiety and projection onto others.

Because of the abundance of goodness in my life right now, I have been focusing on these two parts in order to be able to continue letting it all in. It’s easy for parts to get scared when things are going well. In a dimension where things tend to “go wrong”, we can make predictions ahead of time of what may not work or what we might lose. In that, we lose the moment. We lose what we have in the present and we don’t get everything out of it that we could.

I’m working on not expecting the worse. On not bracing myself for the impact of something bad. But first, I feel the parts that do expect the worst and discover why that is. The more that Shai and Michael vulnerably share their fears with me, the more they will fall in love and fall in tandem with one another. That’s when their gifts can shine and that love can be shared with others.

We talk about inner sacred union a lot for a reason. It’s so important to start within. To grow the glow of love so brightly that it shines through every pore and into those around you.

*****

I found this poem from almost two years ago that I thought was fitting for this! It’s from my masculine too my feminine:

I always thought I was different than the other men

More sensitive

More emotional

More mature

 

I thought I was protecting you from the other men

Giving you edges

Hiding your feelings

Numbing your reactions

 

I thought you’d be hurt by the other men

They would crack you into pieces

They would scratch your porcelain skin

They would break your fragile heart

 

But now I see your strength as a woman

Your compassion

Your empathetic prowess

Your stillness and energy, both

 

I thought I could hide you as a woman

Under formless clothing

Under quick-witted comebacks

Under disinterest in romance

 

Maybe now I can support you as a woman

Become the mind to your heart

Become the here to your now

Become the pot to your plant

 

I’m not meant to be your guard,

But instead your partner

Your partner in this dance

Few know the steps to

 

Where our rhythms match,

Our hearts unite

And our souls release the energy

Of every star in the nighttime sky

*****

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, community, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.