inspiration – Page 38 – Divine Self Embodiment Blog (Formerly SoulFullHeart)

Soothing, Softening And Healing Our Inner Protector

Published on May 16, 2017May 16, 2017 by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

queen

There were edges in me yesterday. They were much softer than they once were, yet were there just the same, poking outward from inside, wanting me to be covered with some spiky armor to keep energies out and to protect a preciousness inside of me, an ever-awakening yin-ness and sacred feminine energy, from being too exposed. It’s a more male-feeling edge, a masculinity that is so subtle now after years of working with energies like this on different layers of my BEing through this process of mine. This energy has needed to be there, to navigate solo life chapters, to hold my online English tutoring job, to manage my money, my body, my dog, many many pieces and parts and aspects of me and my life. A fatherly energy that has also been a mate to parts of me, drawing men he can criticize and find ways to “keep out”, and the same goes for female connections too, no matter how porous. Essentially his job has been keeping love out instead of letting it flow inward and outward as its meant to and wants to, letting go more and more of control and fear-based frequencies, letting go of expecting a battle to ensue with just about everyone on some level and allowing my inner Queen, my soft and supple yet strong inner feminine, to rise….

This is a part of me and not a part of me, too… he feels more energetic than solid as our subpersonalities/parts normally are. He is a layer of my loyal inner protector as a woman. He has helped me through so much, been a genuine knight assigned to protect my inner Queen until she is strong enough to BE on her own. He has shown up consistently and gallantly, well-beyond his call of duty. Now is the time to help him rest more and more and the only way I can truly offer him that, is to feel him every chance I get… as luck (and LOVE!) would have it, I have plenty of “grist”, as we say in SoulFullHeart in which to feel him – opportunities and situations in my life where he shows up more and I can feel him doing so. I even feel him now as I write this, editing my words, spelling and grammar a bit as I go, wanting to help me bridge this experience for YOU, whether or not you too are a woman, for men have this too. It’s a wounded masculine expression, formed in response to the pervasive wounded masculine in different timelines of our current and ever-evolving, ascending world. He says this and also offers that it is truly gutsy, deeply courageous, to question these edges these protectors provide for us… to ask them to let our vulnerability BE and shine, to let love in and show a trust in love that they don’t often have or feel unless we can help them find it again.

The hardest part of differentiating from this protector energy inside of us, is recognizing when and how it shows up. It so often has BEEN us for our whole lives up to now, and we have been convinced that this is really all there is to us in some ways (and this part has felt this about themselves). We are led to feel that what we are doing is inhabiting true man and womanhood, yet this is based so much on our often very limited and deeply wounded templating passed down from generations in our birth cultures and birth families and hasn’t yet been questioned. One of the biggest signs of any awakening on any level is starting to ask these and ANY questions like, “is this is really what I’ve been called to live as/like?”, “is this really me?”, “is this really all there is?”

The waves of movements and illuminations come into our BEing the more we open to receive them, in this process of softening and growing and relearning, in this process of getting to know our parts and uncovering our truest selves. Edges and spikes soften, reactions are challenged and soothed, fires are given fireplaces, and our hearts fill up with more and more love that was forbidden to come into us for so long.

Jelelle Awen and I are holding and hosting a group call for women this coming Saturday, where you can be supported by our energy and the yin already baking and waking inside of you. Here is the link to find out more: https://www.facebook.com/events/1083484598423538/

Our last group call for women was this past month, and Jelelle led us through a meditation to meet our inner protectors. You can listen to the recording of the teachings and meditation from that call here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vNPCtTQ9O-E

And, Jelelle and I offer you ongoing support in service of the LOVE that you ARE through space holding sessions, should you feel called to explore more of what I’m sharing here today and how it shows up in your own BEing and life. More information on that is here: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/soulfullheartwoman

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Loving Room: Entering The Doorway

Published on May 14, 2017July 27, 2017 by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

Painting by Josephine Wall

Graphic created by Gabriel Heartman

by Kalayna Colibri

You wander down a corridor, doors on either side, some with much space in between them, others not. Some are painted in beiges and browns, some have psychedelic colours, others look and feel like rainbows and light… then one catches your eye just as you begin to pass it by.

You immediately stop and turn on your heels to head back towards it, not sure why you’re compelled by it all of a sudden, but it doesn’t matter to you in that moment. The aura of the door feels warm and you get the sense that someone on the other side might want to embrace you… your logical mind tries to grasp at how this could be possible, yet it begins to let go in almost the same breath, sensing it might have a place to rest in this room. Your hand reaches out to turn the golden knob, only to realize that the door is no longer solid. You step through it, as your mind begins to loosen more.

Now inside, you see that the ceiling is gone and there is only a sky with clouds, dancing themselves into different forms and patterns, some of which you recognize, others you don’t. There seems to be layers to this “sky” you see above you, and in fact, this room seems to have layers too somehow, or at least you can sense it does. You also see some lush sofas, comfy chaise lounges, luxurious hammocks, friendly plants and you hear music playing softly in the background now, a welcoming sound that doesn’t have its usual form or patterns, but it has frequencies that somehow send waves of HUM through your body and the energetic field around your body too.

You take this in for a few moments, feeling the fresh air and beaming sunlight. It’s not a room, yet it IS a room too somehow. And as your mind continues loosening, the need to make “sense” of this dissolves in spite of you. A feeling that you’re “home” washes through and over you. A feeling you haven’t really felt before, except maybe as a very young child, and yet it feels like something you experienced at another time and place too, not in this life you have been living as “you”.

As you walk around the room a bit, you see that there is no clock to track “time” as there would be in most rooms you’ve experienced.

On a wall of vines, next to a majestic tree, you see a large mirror, taller and wider than you are, leaning yet stable. Its framing looks and feels ancient, with filigree and rosettes. As you gaze at the self reflected inside of it, at first you see features and colours that you recognize as “you”. This feels to last but a moment before something shifts and suddenly you seem to be seeing yourself from a very strange angle, yet the mirror itself hasn’t moved! This angle is awkward, showing you parts of your body you’ve avoided looking at at times and it seems you can also see your shadow appear – first above and behind your shoulder, then also near your neck on the opposite side, down near your hands, beside your leg, and close to your feet. Your shadow moves suddenly and seems to cover you, accentuating the angle you’ve already decided you don’t like seeing… yet you stay there, in front of the mirror, compelled to see more, to feel more, to get to know more.

“Why?” part of you asks, “why now? Why do I have to see myself this way?”

As tears fall, you begin to realize what’s happening. You turn away from the mirror and lay down on a sofa as you continue to cry. You feel something rise up from within and without you, holding you as this happens. It is the embrace you were drawn to on the other side of the door, the reason why you stepped into this room in the first place. You collapse more into the tears as memories come in. You are surprised at how you don’t feel overwhelmed by this and that you’ve actually been wanting and needing this release for so long…

As the tears fade, you continue to feel the comfort of that embrace. You feel stronger than before. A smile spreads across your face and a lightness you haven’t known since you were a child fills your being. Your heart feels a bit raw, but the healing balm of this lightness and joy help to hold and soothe it.

You don’t really want to leave this room, yet you sense that now that you’ve been here, it will be with you always, and you can always return to it whenever you want or feel called to. As you pass through the door, you realize that the memory of what happened here will always be with you and the embrace you felt is bound to change you forever.

Welcome to the Loving Room. ❤

***

Expanding Beyond The Ceiling You’ve Known

Published on May 12, 2017 by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Colibri

imagination (1)

Along this path of healing, we start realizing that there is something higher than the ceiling we’ve been used to… the feeling of who we are, the stories we’ve been, this starts to fade ever so slightly while we wait for more to come in and shake out the old, once rigid approaches to every aspect of life: love, relationships, money, work, time, nature, etc.

There’s a turn towards a new importance, a focus on something above and around what you’ve felt was your normal. Even the normal ups and downs of every day, where reactions to various people and situations are so common place you may not really notice them or question why they are there. This is not meant to be tricky or hard to do… this tracking arises as its meant to and we can choose to shift or stay where we are, yet that ceiling above us keeps wanting to rise and rise, nonetheless!

I feel for myself how I’m in this very process right now, where there is a desire to reach up higher, beyond what I’ve previously felt possible inside parts of me. It’s a desire to ascend with my entire being, my whole heart, my very insides joining in with my outsides. My closest relationships lead the way for me to feel and BEcome this more and more, as I’ve worked for this place of BEing with them as my personal growth deepens and expands, both… I can feel my leadership arising anew, looking and feeling much different than I ever thought or dreamed it would. In some ways it’s in its infancy and yet in other ways I’m already there.

Reaching out and up, touching the places above and beyond the immediate notions of who I am and who YOU are… there is much more to discover as the flowerbeds inside are tilled and shifted. The places of waiting are collapsing into places of new arrivals, new waves of immediate coming-ins, even while the goings-out are felt and at times mourned too. So much to let in and let go of too, making room for only MORE, not less. There is no “less”, now, though parts of you may still experience life this way. There isn’t less money, there is only room for MORE! There aren’t less relationships in our lives, there is just space for ones with MORE resonance and love!

The lighting up of our very BEings is happening at an exponential rate, a quickening pace, if we can continue opening up our petals to let more sunshine in. Today, this is my focus as I continue holding classes with my English students, hold a SoulFullHeart facilitant, hold my dog and her needs and hold myself and what I WANT and NEED in this upcoming and already ongoing chapter of newly accepted yumminess and possibilities… a day and yet a whole life too of response and moving UPward as each new moment dawns and each new experience beckons my heart to keep pressing forward into a more central place in my very full (and yet filling up!) life.

This invitation I feel inside is welling up to call to the beacons inside of everyone I have the chance to touch in some way… including any of you taking this in. We ARE called to more and more and still more than parts of us are ready to imagine possible, especially when they have been so used to suffering and feeling as if the ceiling above them is pressing downward (when it really wants to be moving upward). The next level of consciousness to climb up into is at your heart’s doorstep, calling you out to play, wanting you to join in with its chorus of feeling life as fun, alive and beyond your as yet dreamed dreams. Maybe you’ll move your ceiling upward today, just as I too am working towards. The connections there to self and other smell, feel and so seem worth it to reach for again and again, until the way becomes clear and the movements towards it become abundant and ultimately, unstoppable. ❤

***

Remembering Your Power To Choose Your Personal Healing Process

Published on May 5, 2017May 5, 2017 by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kalayna Colibri

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Your healing cannot ever really be forced upon you, it can only be chosen by a growing and expanding you… This choice comes both consciously and unconsciously, as we walk in and out of life situations and relationships, and this right of choosing our next steps is always present though at times it feels as if it may be hiding itself from us rather well.

Whenever we feel the press of a choice we’re making or have made, we’re feeling an opportunity to experience ourselves anew. From this place we can find a new clarity of our mission and purpose for being here. It can also help us discover higher consciousness and awareness… and it can bring us to a renewed sense of our power inside of ourselves when we decide to choose something different as our next step. Sometimes baking in unfavorable conditions is what leads us here and sometimes we find ways to wake ourselves up enough to take one more step forward, finding more and more clarity as we go (sometimes without fully realizing what we’re doing or why in the moment, yet the clarities unfold anyways!).

We can’t actually stop the momentum of our souls, try as we might… as I go on in my own life and serve others as well, I feel more and more how true it is that our souls know exactly what’s happening and where it’s leading. At times I get a strong sense that our souls already have an idea about where they want to take us, so the steps to getting there are all necessary and also in collaboration with this ready-made path. Our choices remain ours to own… and not a single one of them is or has been “wrong” so much as just another perfect expression of our power and how we feel our power in the moment.

Sometimes the ascension process feels like it is taken on by parts of us who actually aren’t ready for what it could really be asking of us. Becoming more fluid with responding to our arising emotional and physical changes and needs seems to be the real process as we go higher and experience life in much brighter ways. Maybe some of us would be best not to call it “ascension” for a while, as there can be something in the feeling tones of it that has some charge as we all navigate changes in ourselves, our relationships and our lives and our parts put pressure on themselves (and each other) to always get HIGHER. I feel there is an ongoing invitation for us to feel this process more PERSONally. Our souls are affected by cosmic movements, yes, and they are being affected for our growth on a PERSONal, and human level as an individual. We will and ARE dancing cosmically, as we can’t help but do that as part of the cosmos in its creativity, power, infinity, and utter beauty, yet we are also here as star-seeded humans too, encouraged to bring our humanity with us as we flow upward into a higher consciousness than we have ever known in this life… a path we can take WITH our souls and not just AS our souls…

Though it can be hard to feel it and even harder to let it in, there is a huge gift in being you… Even if you are moving through pain in the moment, there is a YOU that you have signed up to become more and more of, in line with your huge soul. You are navigating this in every moment and there are no wrong choices, though some choices may keep you feeling small along the way… but only long enough to bear you into a phase of embracing your bigness. When you have reached the end of your tether to shrinking in your life, you will so know it and feel it stirring, rumbling something deep within you. YOU are the earthquake parts of you have been wondering about and perhaps fearing and there is something so awesome about that very thing… because it means that you are so incredibly powerful and your choices are an expression of that…

There is so much to feel in each movement we make towards ourselves and each moment of feeling life blooming around and within us. We are here to keep it all flowing through every choice point, and flow on it does in every expression of our power and every new step we take towards inhabiting our bigness and our true love light shining from inside.

❤

***

Exploring The Internal Wilderness Of Manhood

Published on May 3, 2017 by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

Wilderness

By Raphael Awen

Manhood itself is the unexplored wilderness that the wild-at-heart man himself is invited into.

Knowing what manhood is, is NOT what qualifies a man to be a man, but rather the willingness to admit that he doesn’t know what it is. Any grasp or attainment on being a man is continually held with an open hand knowing that real men are time and time again called to show up for ‘a something more’, that they have yet to find.

Manhood explorations that are perceived as external to the man in role play-outs such as mate, father, husband, career are really all just external manifestations of what has or hasn’t happened for the man INTERNally. A real man is ever an intern, a beginner, and where it ALL begins for him is his own heart, the source and resource of all that he is.

It’s quite telling that popular male modelling is about ‘not being a sissy’ and putting away your tears. This is actually a male role model of the fear of one’s true manhood power, NOT an expression of it.

The entire patriarchy is about the suppression of the feminine of men inside of themselves, suppressing their own inner feminine, and needing then to manifest externally what’s happening internally. The man is afraid of his own true power, and dressing himself up with a power exterior to cover that.

What actually gives a man the powerful attraction energy dancing between him and a mate, or between him and his world, is finding this duality dance more and more inside of himself. When this inner duality dance between the feminine and the masculine is flatlined, the man loses the vitality of his own inner mating with himself, and that flat line manifests outwardly in his relationships with all of life. He then has to grasp at false male power to compensate.

To really approach manhood is to approach, court and mate with one’s inner feminine, and from there a truly powerful, grounded, irresistible MALENESS ARISES, the true phallus engorged with heart.

Gabriel Heartman and I are leading a group call this Saturday for men, seeking more of themselves. I’d like to invite YOU into YOU, and beginning here in the presence of other men hungry for their own true inner unexplored power!

A choice and a no-minimum donation gets you in the room with others making the same admission…that we are set on showing up for our own more. The event details are here. I hope you decide to join us!

https://www.facebook.com/events/1257237587706349/

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to make a donation to support our work at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Our Symphonic Reunion

Published on May 2, 2017 by Gabriel Heartman1 Comment

Through the misty waters I see your shore

The banks of your once hidden palace

The veil has become thinned

Through the clearing of our once wounded hearts

I stand upon my gallant ship with treasures unsold

It was a time for me to lose and find myself once more

To remember all that I had left behind

Yet never denied

I fought my battles and learned many lessons

But it is time for a new adventure

A new embarkation to a sensual destination

Where the wild winds of ember flows

Into the starry night sky of the distant unknown

May I step closer to you with my hand stretched out?

To hold your gentle caress upon my love pulsed chest

May I bring my You-starved lips upon your silken rows?

To taste your rose petal laced skin

Along the highway of your sweetly browned silhouette?

The memories of our distant Now come rushing back to front

The days of earth and beyond the sky

Collide in a symphony of blended merging

A knot of perpetual entering and leaving

The sweet motion of our thunderous revolutions

Sounds of the calling of our inner soul’s yearning

Are echoed from the highest peaks to the forest floor below

The rise and fall of our joy of reunion

And the fear of losing it all once more

We stare into the deepest silence of our tear filled doorways

Into the vastness of our Oneness

That contains the passion of our Twoness

Into the space of No Time but This Time

This Me in this You

That You in that Me

We feel dusk drawing its shutters to this moment

For it is time to return to the place we find ourselves in waiting

In claiming, in loving ourselves back to this moment

When we meet each other again

Only this time much closer than the time before

In this soon to be speck of time

I tell you that I am Here with you Now

There is no distance that separates us

For I claim the space between us as no space at all

Until we meet again in the middle of our soul stretched bridge

Where the portals of our hearts are opened once more

I leave you with my crown as a gift of my claim

That you are all that I have been dreaming of.

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, men’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

This Beltane Call, For The Love of US

Published on May 2, 2017May 1, 2017 by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kalayna Colibri

beltane

Beloved that you are,
When the smoke clears
on life’s regulating ways
and gives way to the undulating meadows
of new love’s first spring,
there I’ll be
standing in the light
of the sun shining above me,
firm in the ground I walk on
yet lightly walking toward your ready stance,
singing a song
we will both remember.

In Beltane’s past, my love
we dined and danced
and brought together our intertwining
everythings
to mingle in the love light
of the divine masculine and feminine dawnings.

In Beltane’s new arrivals, love
we’ll linger long
in embraces for only us to feel
in the eye of the mind’s connection
until the refreshing breath
of a crisp and ripe chapter
brings us closer
in all elements of this life’s wanderings.

In myself I stay here for you, love
finding more treasure long buried
to show you
in vulnerable ownership
echoing the also deep claim
you have inside of you for you.

The winds of change
and graspings of renewing tides
grip at our thrown-about clothing
to move us closer
to the edges
that keep US alive…

Together we will meet, my beloved
and there we will find
what we have been searching for…
a counterpart
not to bind, but to bond
not to cling, but to sing
not stifle with duty
but to bring out with bounding life’s alterations and celebrations…
of each new movement
here…

Bring your mountains out to greet the new day, love
and see the power of our sunshines mingling
on the new, insatiable appetite
of a love reunited
in a way that was agreed to
long ago and yet NOW too.

Even NOW I make a vow to you,
to be all the more loyal to myself
and dedicate overflow to you
to what we will create together
in our messy masses of alchemical baths
and swooning passes.

Love, when we do meet again
here
I will dress the moon in your honor
and harness the sun’s rays for your Kingdom to come
and our world that is being reborn…

On this Beltane celebration day,
As I ache for you
I prepare that place in my heart
that is you-shaped
where you already live…
and that place in my body’s life
where your essence will connect
so much
oh, so much…
with mine.

***

REALLY Showing Up For What YOU REALLY Want.

Published on May 1, 2017 by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

no-time

By Raphael Awen

What would YOU show up for in life, REALLY show up for, given the opportunity?

Asking the first question leads to second one that goes something like this ‘Well, I know I have it in me to REALLY show up for something, but I know myself enough to know that I would only REALLY show up for something heart and soul, ALL IN, if it REALLY called to me,…so what then is it that I REALLY want?’

Awesome QUESTion! What IS it that YOU…REALLY… WANT?

The entire universe literally awaits your answer to that question. The next great literature of the world will be written from your ‘literalizing’ of this quest and question inside of you.

To enter this quest, and have life and love as your SPONSOR giving YOU all you need to undertake this quest depends upon your literalizing of this offer that life and love are extending to you. Life can offer and even offer inspiration, but it cannot go beyond that, or it would be diminishing your power and learning. What’s more, rescuing YOU in this way of choosing for you would kill the fun and adventure that YOU signed up for as well. Life sees YOU in an exciting and ‘funnest-fun’ kind of adventure. This of course appeals to all of us, from the part of us who may only be seeking a bit of medicative distraction from boredom, all the way to the part of us wanting to blow the doors off of our limited life picture who resonates at a deep soul level with these words.

My truth is that for everyone of us, if we are here and breathing, that breath itself is alive with opportunity that is calling to us, and it is calling us on an EPIC level to step into our next pieces. Only YOU can know what that is even if it’s just a sniff of your next step. The YOU-ni-verse is in that sniff. Until there is action on that sniff, YOU are actually telling the universe and your guides that YOU aren’t ready to move. YOU are using your sovereign power of your sovereign being to ‘decide, decree and declare’ to the universe and all of its subjects that YOU will be remaining where YOU are…that you’re not REALLY going to be showing up for anything.

So I ask again, what would YOU show up for in life, REALLY show up for, given the opportunity?

Can you see here that the question isn’t any longer about the ‘given the opportunity’ part? That was just a ruse coming from the part of YOU bent on staying stuck, making it look like that owning your power was predicated upon an outside chance opportunity coming your way, as if it wasn’t staring you in the face, impatiently waiting. Life itself IS the opportunity.

I’ve wrestled with this QUESTion time and time again. This one, you and I won’t ever actually ever fully get. You are an infinite being on an infinite exploration. THAT’S MAGICAL! You’re not going to run out of excitement, engagement and ‘next pieces’ if you take up this offer life is extending you. It will call upon every emerging ounce of your courage as you know it. Surprisingly though, you ‘blowing your wad’ on courage, going all in, won’t deplete your courage, but en-courage you to take on the next piece, and the next one after that.

If you see a next piece together with me, or with SoulFullHeart, that’s exciting to me! I’m out today sniffing my next pieces to REALLY show up for. If you are a man reading this, I’d like to offer you, from my universe, a possible ‘next piece’ in the Men’s Group Call on the Sacred Masculine coming up this Saturday that I’m leading along with Gabriel Heartman (details below). This in itself is a portal into a new world. Yes, there are many to choose from, but nothing moves in your kingdom or mine until choice occurs. But when it does,… watch out!

Your choice and a donation of any amount gets YOU in this sacred space with Gabriel and I and the rest of the MEN wanting to REALLY show up for themselves. I’m REALLY in if you are! 🙂

Here’s the men’s call event:https://www.facebook.com/events/1257237587706349/

Carrying “Home” With Us Always: The Yin Of A Visiting Sea Turtle

Published on April 29, 2017April 30, 2017 by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kalayna Colibri

Sitting on the beach, feeling and discussing sacred feminine energies with a new connection was magical enough… yet in the next arising moment, a giant mama sea turtle came wandering up onto the beach, likely looking for a place to nest. I stood back while others scrambled to watch her and take pictures from close-up. I was struck by her beauty and power and felt tears welling up in my eyes as I took her in from a distance. I felt concern for her safety with the crowd around her, yet she took care of herself and went back to the ocean. This wasn’t the time for her to come ashore. Her task of laying eggs could wait a little longer.

She beamed with a natural stillness… a willingness to slowly make her way to her next chapter of laying eggs. For us, this is like embracing the process of going inside, planting seeds when it’s time to outside of us without forcibly making our way, and taking good care of ourselves and our inner-seedlings in the meantime. Time is something that doesn’t exist in the animal kingdom/queendom. Their sense of “timing” comes from making sure they can continue doing what they know innately they are here to do. Maybe they have a sense of their own mortality, but maybe they don’t need one to encourage them towards living life, because they are so in the moment at all times and not married to any sense of days, minutes or hours. Life arises for and with them again and again.

I feel a strong template and a connection to the Divine Feminine in this turtle. She had a stillness in her beauty and a beauty in her stillness. There was no need to somehow construct a self-image that would make her appear more attractive. She had a natural course of action, a path laid out for her by her very nature. She was beautiful because she was HER unabashedly… and not trying to be anything else. And, she took care of herself. She was vulnerable to human harm and yet strong and determined in her vulnerability. In her Yin way, she carries her home with her always. A place to retreat INside to whenever she needs, especially for safety and comfort. We have this too and with process we can get to this place of also carrying our homes with us ALWAYS….

During this time of growing desires for the mates we really want to have in our lives, nature is giving us a lot of clues. It feels like there is a NATURAL fit for everyone and sometimes that fit is simply YOU for as long as it needs to be. In this way, there really is NO competition. This feels true for life paths and soul purposes too… the days of competition are coming to an end as those who are ready to serve out of a deep love overflow inside of themselves from doing immense work there, step up now in all of their strong vulnerability and natural them-ness. We are all learning to arise for ourselves in ways we hadn’t realized were possible and we thus we’re starting to arise for each other too!

THIS is the beauty of collapsing constructs and systems and ways of being… once they have collapsed INSIDE, then the rewards come forward and the pure joy of being able to serve and BE love in a much purer form than before can really fill us up!

To this strong, stunning part of Gaia in sea turtle form, thank you for showing up when and how you did yesterday at the beach… I am still digesting your visit but wow, you’ve already taught me a lot… and I look forward to more. ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge and healer, writer, and poetess.Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Loving And Healing Our Inner Punisher To Love Life Again (and MORE!)

Published on April 27, 2017 by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kalayna Colibri

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I’ve been feeling layers of inner-punisher frequencies inside myself for years now. They come and go, seem to fade away and then come back stronger, usually when I am inhabiting more of my soul gifts and bigness. These parts, when left unfelt, can tend to throw wrenches in the newly-greased wheels of forward movement and this can express as sabotage of our jobs, our relationships, etc. As their energy wells-up inside of us it can overflow outward to others, even during times when we feel we are serving love. It’s not that there isn’t ANY love available in those moments, yet if we are offering discernments and reflections to others that come with heavy judgments too, this is a frequency springing from judgments INside, from us to us. It can be subtle to most people, which is why the reflections from life, love and others who have been there are SO important. Once you really start recognizing and working with these frequencies inside of you though, that’s when you notice this happening and can really learn to be with it as it heals and transmutes into something new inside of you.

So what is the actual gift of connecting with these parts of us?

This layer of “punisher/shame” (shame comes up as the underbelly of this part and often has very strong frequencies too) that I’m working with right now, I was able to really feel in a session with Jelelle and Raphael yesterday. This layer represents a lot of my conditioning as a woman and also a human being, coming from my upbringing, culture and birth family. This part also represents and holds a ton of power, which is really my personal, creative and alchemical power. It is power that has been misguided in its use and purpose, choosing to fixate on what is going wrong or could go wrong, versus all of the wonders and wonderfuls that are happening at the same time and that COULD SO happen in the near “future”. This revelation came as a surprise in some ways, and yet made so much sense. Inner-punisher frequencies are powerful, yes, and play out in so many ways in our lives, yet finding a love inside of us that can love this misuse of power, forgive it and then guide it to use this power for something GOOD and love-focused, THIS is life-changing.

I have felt before how possible it is that the two most deeply transformative parts of us to connect with are the inner-punisher/critic and the magical or inner child… there is a very strong need to connect with the protector as well in order to access these frequencies fully. Yet, when it’s the phase for it, working with these two parts of us illuminates so much about us, the timelines we have subconsciously chosen and lived in so far and all of the choices we’ve made that have placed us in the life circumstances we’re in now. It truly is a journey to finding, feeling and reuniting with our purity and our astounding power, to connect with these and any other parts of us that come forward. Feeling the heaviness that comes with this package DOES open out into something so much better than we have yet imagined… or maybe we have but have had trouble really buying it as a possibility with these unfelt parts denying that there is any space for that inside of us (even though THEY want the lovely outcomes too!).

Work with these energies inside of us seems to only happen on a deeply transformative level if we can allow ourselves to be humbled by it and let in reflections from others who have been there. These energies can play out in so many subtle ways that it becomes very hard to really track it all on our own. After all, these habits and ways of being are so ingrained in many of us that it really just feels like who we ARE. I want to offer though that these frequencies are NOT us at the core of our being and with some courage, dedication and tons of love, we can move them, heal them, and become more and more of who we ARE, creating the timelines we actually want and living a life that we genuinely love. ❤

We are so here for you if you would like some help shining light on this complex matrix inside of you where your own inner-punisher is possibly living. This really CAN and WANTS to heal inside of you with some earnest love and care. Visit http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions for more information about sessions with a SoulFullHeart facilitator. ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge and healer, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

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