Tag: parts work

Welcoming The Peaks And Valleys Of Awakening

Published on by Raphael Awen2 Comments

by Raphael Awen

You can have what you want. That’s not actually the question.

The bigger question is about being ready to have what you want.

A part of you may readily say ‘oh, believe me, I’m ready! I’m so ready, I’m getting both depressed and impatient waiting to have what I really want.’

But this is only taking into consideration one part of you. Other parts of you can be just off your radar and actively resisting you (or what we call ‘you’) as they are not interested at all in these big changes ‘you’ feel you are so ready for. This resistive part of you is not something you can control, but it is something that you are responsible for, and something that you need to become responsive to.

Then, there is also another aspect of you, that is probably also just off your radar and that is your higher self. Your higher self may have chosen a preferred path of difficulty and going without something that another part of you deeply desires in order to learn and grow through a difficulty. It wouldn’t actually be a growth crucible without this tension between what ‘you’ want and don’t want. Your higher self is also something you cannot control, but it is something you are responsible for and that you also need to become more responsive to.

You are not a victim. Your life as you know it now is shaped by you, and the life you will come to know in the future is also shaped by you.

Your life as it is right now, warts and all, is perfect in the midst of imperfection. You are perfect while growing and learning. All the angst, pain and confusion is sacred. You had so much heaven that you needed to dial up hell in order to grow. Your soul loved the heaven it knew, but it also wanted more, and it knew the path to more was though the tension of less.

Consciously letting go of reaching for peak experiences and instead welcoming your awaiting valley experiences is what your soul may be asking of you. You may have very much needed your awakening experiences that happened through the peak experiences to let you know what is possible and what awaits you. But now, your soul wants you to let go of what a part of you may be be in danger of becoming quite addicted to, in order now to more consciously connect to what you actually came here for.

Whether conscious or not, you can’t escape growth. Growth is built into the DNA of the universe that you are a part of. While you can’t escape growth, you can accept your awakening to what is, and even the need to mourn the loss of your deep night’s rest in the 3D fusion of unconsciousness.

Now, as you are awakening, you are offered a conscious choice that your path up, is a path down. The downward path is a matter of feeling all there is to feel that you were not able to feel while asleep in 3D consciousness.

This will involve feeling crappy on a regular basis for a good amount of time. If this isn’t an option for ‘you’, then you are not yet ready for this deeper more conscious path of healing, but you can be assured, all of us will be invited and re-invited to return here just as soon and we are ready to. It is what we came here for. We came here to ascend with all of us, without any ‘lesser’ parts of us left behind being punished for any insubordination, or for just not getting the program.

Time now to look at what we’ve called ‘spiritual practices’ to feel where they are actually about transcending in the name of ascending, where they are about not feeling, rather than true healing.

We all come eventually to having what we most deeply want, with the fullest and deepest bliss that we can’t quite imagine. We are living our way to being able to imagine it as we feel and heal the parts of us still in deep pain that were covered over with our positive spirituality agendas.

Time now for a negative spirituality agenda that sees it all as sacred.

Raphael Awen

~

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

Taking A Day To Be With Your Inner Child

Published on by Kasha Rosa7 Comments

By Kalayna Solais

Dedicating a day to be with your Inner Child or any other part of you is hugely rewarding and such a deep way to express love for yourself. Connecting with parts of you and aspects of your Metasoul in other lifetimes as well is a huge way to really connect in deeply with this frequency of loving and appreciating who and where you are in your journey as it is right now.

There was a day this week that I decided to spend with this deeper aspect of my own Inner Child that has emerged recently. I’ve done so much work, feeling aspects of me like her in many different layers and expressions over the years, that she feels not only like an ‘Inner Child’ but also like she vibrates at a core place inside of my ‘healer’ and ’empath’ too. The sun codes were vibrating and a local park, a personal favourite place to BE in this city where I live, was calling us out to be in it, hanging out with our beloved duck, squirrel, and tree friends. We even brought along our little ‘duckie’ stuffy to ‘introduce’ to the REAL ducks there! 🙂

When I met this part of me, she had been living ‘alone’ in her world until I connected with her in a recent session with Jelelle. Connecting directly with me is new for her and it’s her first time really letting in intimacy. She has some social trauma to keep feeling with her, which all started when I was very little. She is very sensitive and empathic (as Inner Children tend to be) and she is learning how to let others in in a deeper way, with my help, and not assume that others don’t like her or to find reasons to stay in her world all alone, isolating herself from relationships of all kinds.

Discovering her has been a huge, HUGE gift to me, as she is helping me feel the deeper core disconnect from others that has been a habit for me my whole life this life, and where this disconnect has come from all along. She is a big part of my healer’s heart and desire to serve love, so helping her move into a new space in deeper connection with me and also with others I am in relationship with will really help ME step more into my soul purpose work with more self-love overflow and an expanded capacity to hold space for others.

As we spend ‘time’ with these precious parts of us, we are offered a very powerful portal into ourselves. As they become less afraid of ‘getting in trouble’ for what they’ve hidden from us when it comes to who they are and why they’ve reacted in the ways they have to life and relationships too, they can quite quickly shift into their more magical, joyful frequencies, which seems to really free up our hearts in new and arising ways that maybe weren’t exactly expected!

Much love, from my parts to yours. ❤

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart facilitant, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

 

The Process Of Healing ‘Sisterhood’ Inside and Out

Published on by Kasha Rosa5 Comments

by Kalayna Solais

Letting in REAL sisterhood… the kind where you aren’t calling each other ‘sister’ because of blood or because somehow spirituality has told you that you ‘should’ in order to honour oneness and acknowledge, even just on the surface, our equality.

Real sisterhood is about calling each other ‘sister’ from the depths of our healing hearts as women. It becomes a declaration of love coming from the sisterhood inside, healing between parts within us who have been against each other for different reasons, and making space for this same frequency and depth of healing to happen between souls we are connected to on the outside.

This is new. This isn’t a process for which the depths of it have really been acknowledged. It’s challenging to look at how deep and often unconscious the competitiveness, comparison, and fear of each other lives and breathes within each of us as women. Simply starting to call each other ‘sister’ only reaches so deep. It so easily becomes a label without a heartbeat and without genuine care about each other.

To care about each other as sisters in soul and heart requires an awful lot of letting ourselves in, of feeling how and why it’s been hard to have deep intimacy with other women both in this life and in other lifetimes too and the karmic binds alive in them. It’s easy enough to let parts of us claim that this is a result of our conditioning and the messages in the media alone… yet, when we bring this inward, we can feel how yes, the outside influences have been there for a very long time, yet where the looping of this conditioning can finally close and heal is on the inside and this is where those lifetimes of persecution and pain can finally heal too.

Since the latest women’s call last weekend and for a few weeks beforehand, I’ve been letting in resonant relationships with other young women around my age who are doing the same SoulFullHeart process work that I’ve been doing for years now. We are taking the space to connect together, sometimes for several hours at a time over video call since we don’t live in the same country at the moment and can’t connect in person. We update each other on our personal processes and feel them together while we also clear anything that needs to be felt and cleared between us, feeling our hearts in the space and the desire to become closer. We feel our soul resonance and soul sisterhood on a deep level wanting to become more of a felt reality between us. This is not something I’ve experienced very often, especially with women my age, and that’s been so painful that parts of me in the past have shut down the desire for it altogether.

This is all an expansion of what I’ve experienced moving in me for years now with Raianna and Jelelle as part of this process too… but to be experiencing this with young women in my actual ‘peer’ group is a whole other thing, not surprisingly!

There are moments of caution that arise in these connections. On my side, I feel where this comes from is how often parts of me have felt ignored or unwanted by other women. The social pain of this continues to be flushed out, as even this morning I felt with a part of me that I’m calling my ‘Inner Sister’, how foreign it feels to really be ‘seen’ in my gifts by women my age and to SEE them in theirs too without feeling jealousy or defensiveness first. There are concerns for this part of me that we are/she is the ‘problem’, always, in every connection that goes sideways or when painful reflections are sometimes offered about how we’ve impacted others when connecting with them. Feeling shame takes over for feeling compassion for where the other person is coming from. This is all so much about intimacy though, and having a deep and real connection with other women needs to just feel strange and foreign and unknown until it becomes the new normal to be in these sort of ‘catalytic’ (not ‘catty’) relationships that get to expand the healing and growth on both sides. And, ultimately, the feelings of shame and being ‘the problem’ live inside of me between parts of me and this is the only place where these reactions and projections can fully heal.

We truly cannot place expectations on other women around us to become ‘sisters’ in a deep way without acknowledging the work that needs to be done within and between each other. This process though is so worth every moment of tension and expansion, because it IS what seeds the ‘reLOVEution’ we’ve been wanting to experience in how we relate to and treat one another, especially as feminine energies who are all here to be in our bigger soul purpose work and Divine Feminine LOVE ambassadorship!

Much love,

Kalayna

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart facilitant, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Incoming Spring Sun Codes Remind Us To Be ‘Gentle’ Within

Published on by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Solais

In this hemisphere, we are now skirting the edges of the awakening of spring time, which supports us all to do our ‘spring cleaning’ on ALL layers and levels of our BEing. I walked home from my day job yesterday to take in the sunshine, feeling intuitively that I needed it as support for my own personal transitions and upgrades right now.

 

What I seemed to capture in the photos I took were some powerful codes that continually encourage emergence from this last winter’s sometimes very intense inward time. I also felt them lighting a spark within. A spark of burgeoning clarity but also of the motivation to keep going, keep feeling, keep letting in the next growth edges and phases while letting in love too.

It’s that ‘while letting in love’ part of it though, that still trips up so many, it feels like. You can be a ‘maniac’ for personal growth and still find it challenging to let in that love is ultimately holding the space for it all, encouraging and supporting you to keep going but to do so with self-love and care too, even gentleness with yourself, which shadow explorations especially need since they have often been so long met with angst and anguish or completely ignored instead.

Sometimes I have to remind parts of me, as desirous as they are to keep experiencing their own healing, that any energies of self-punishment on our way there won’t work anymore… this was especially challenging during my separation from SoulFullHeart this past year. I was reminded by another brilliant, bright soul who is doing this work and living this process that I needed to remember to ‘be gentle’. When she offered me that, I realized how much I, Kalayna, was not holding the process waves coming through but that it was other parts of me, mostly masculine in energy, that were being very hard on themselves to try and ‘get through’ what we were trying much to hard to dive into and feel through. I’ll never forget the impact those words ‘be gentle’ had on me…

And so, here I am, offering them to YOU now…

“Remember to be gentle.”

Maybe this is one of the big messages from the incoming energies right now. As they intensify, actually, we’re left with little choice BUT to discover what being gentle toward ourselves actually means for us individually. The ‘old’ ways of shadow-hunting, of finding ourselves in processes inspired solely by tough and hammering ‘triggers’, of saying ‘yes’ to social situations or going outside of ourselves when what we really need is a bubble bath and some ‘me’ time, are being invited to be felt deeper as we let in and honour the parts of us that have held our/their processes in this way, thinking that they need to stay in their suffering loops in order to experience ultimate healing… in order to ‘deserve’ it/feel ‘worthy’ of it.

There’s so much to tenderly feel with these parts/aspects, however/whenever you can… there are many beautiful guided meditations from Jelelle Awen on our Youtube channel: SoulFullHeart Experience, that can help you start to feel them and bring them into your opening up heart space.

Much love to you, today, and always, during this time of transition into a new internal and external ‘season’ and beyond!

Love,
Kalayna Solais

Raphael and Jelelle Awen are exquisite space holders who are incredible at supporting you in your ongoing personal process. 1:1 sessions with them are available as well as monthly virtual group calls: soulfullheartwayoflife.com

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart facilitant, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Self Empowering and Gently Healing 1:1 Sessions For Women With Master Healer/Divine Feminine Bridge Jelelle Awen

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

“Jelelle is simply amazing with her ability to restore one’s sense of being loved, connected and whole. Sessions with her are powerful and empowering, each one bringing you back into the fullness and Truth of You. I am very grateful to have her as a mentor and couldn’t recommend her more to anyone searching for healing.” – Shanna

“I’ve been having 1:1 sessions with Jelelle for almost a year now. When I started I was struggling badly with severe depression and intermittent suicidal feelings. I’ve been working with and through my issues in therapy for 20 odd years, and whilst I have tried a wide range of healing modalities, often my emotions were ‘too much’ for the facilitators I worked with. The difference I have experienced in working with Jelelle, has been her openness, willingness and deep dedication to her own process. I don’t feel depressed any longer.” – Zureida

“Jelelle is a powerful healer and facilitator, having one of the most gentle yet powerful Love Energies I have been blessed to experience.” – Isabela

“Parts work is all about self mastery. I’ve been doing this work for going on a year. The work aligns beautifully with those of us who are called to answer their own longings….with the most compassionate mirror held to reflect back what they already know. There are no ‘quick’ fixes here, yet a place and space to cull from the depths of your ‘be’ing all those places, people and galaxies we need to ‘re’visit.” – Marci

“It does help and is serving me to have a guide who empowers and bridges the inner relationships though. Jelelle shows me how to offer compassion towards myself and to trust my own inner knowing always!” – Deva

“I am honored to have benefited from many 1:1 sessions with Jelelle. Each has been transformative. She has helped me to release old pain and blockages (from this, and other lifetimes), and feel much more clear, aligned, and present. I look forward to more sessions in the future, and am much-indebted to have benefited from her clear, gentle, and adept guidance, and her intuitive healing abilities. She is a master healer and guide with very special gifts, and a loving, beautiful and wise old soul.” – Amy

And more testimonials at soulfullheartwayoflife.com/testimonials

From their own words in experience of 1:1 sessions with me…such an honor to serve love during this time of transition for so many awakening sacred feminine souls!

Is it your right timing to have a session with me and experience a deep bridging to your OWN soul’s answers, bigness, lifetimes/timelines, activations, and precious parts of self and soul?

It is time to move into direct and visceral experience of your soul gifts, illumination of soul patterns/themes, emotional body woundings, and Divine Mother/Father frequencies rather than looking ‘outside’ for answers. It is time to come out of ‘hiding’ and seed the light into remaining darkness within in order to be a beacon for others.

It is time to claim your soul lineage, such as with the Magdalenes, and with your Star Family/Galactic Consciousness as you move into an ever flowing sense of support and love.

It is time to move into your sacred femininity supported by your Metasoul sisters, Star Family, Divine Mother/Father and your own beautiful parts!

1:1 sessions with me for women are $100 CAD (about $77 USD) for a very full 90 minutes over Zoom. More info here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

You can also join me in catalytic and healing twice monthly group calls – one with Raphael and one for women. More info at: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/events

Love,
Jelelle Awen

Thank you Kalayna Solais for the beautiful card! Magdalene energies coming through!

Jelelle Awen is a Divine Feminine Love Ambassador and Co-Creator/Teacher/Group Facilitator/Ambassador of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about  1:1 individual sessions with her for women and with other SoulFullHeart Facilitators, virtual group calls, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

The Ongoing Journey Of Serving Love

Published on by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Solais

Service is a journey, not a destination…

When I first started awakening and paying close attention to different spiritual teachers, authors, etc, parts of me took this whole world of being a ‘leader’ in personal development, healing, etc as a place of arrival; as somewhere you land, someday, and never leave and are never really asked to leave. I didn’t know back then about the dis-integrity that often comes with these high-up places and ‘roles’ that are often not heart-inhabited or emotionally awakened though the soul may be quite ‘attained’ in many ways.

Parts of me wanted to be one of them… wanted the accolades, the spotlight, the sense of ‘arrival’ and ultimately having ‘healed’ so much. Really though, it was the feeling sense of living your truest soul purpose day-in and day-out, fully aligned with who you came here to BE and what you came here to offer others that was the shiniest asset for me.
Yet… it wasn’t exactly real.

At least not in the ways that I was thinking it was at the time.
There’s a sheen and a glamour that is starting to fade and tarnish now. There are still those who are worshipped yet the abuses they are part of toward others and ultimately themselves is starting to show through the shiny fabric. The ‘Wizard of Oz’ can no longer hide in this process of Ascension.

Even the most highly praised leaders are starting to realize that their sense of service of others, to whatever degree it’s been genuine for them, is in fact an ongoing journey and not an ultimate destination where you no longer need to grow, to look at yourself, to realize what has been hiding in the shadows of your heart and soul that now need to purge out and be seen and felt, loved and humbled.

The desire that has always been with me to get to some ‘place’ where I can serve love more directly with individuals and groups still lives in me to some degree and every day I feel it. I see it show up in others too, even many young men and women are much younger than me, who have parts of them that feel the need to aim for this ‘destination’ place, often as a way (and it was this for me too, once upon a time) to leap-frog over the necessary life experiences and deeper healing processes that come first and foremost in order to be fully embodied and feel the humility (and humanity too) that comes with being of deep service; an alignment with yourself, your soul, your own ongoing healing process that overflows to others with deep integrity and honesty.

I’ve learned over and over again to not rush myself to ‘get somewhere’ I may not be for a while. Supporting those around me that are in a flow of service feels right to my heart for now. I don’t feel that in this I am shrinking at all from my bigness, but that I’m being given space and an invitation to explore my own process deeper, trusting that all of the inward time opens out as needed into some expression of service that can only expand as my soul does.

Maybe, then, we can say that there IS an ‘arrival gate’ when it comes to service-of-love flow and one that you simply ‘know’ you’ve arrived at when you have, yet that it’s only another leg of your very individual journey of YOUR ever-deepening healing and growth process, meant to shift every ground within and outside of you, in all areas of your life and with all parts of you/aspects of your soul.

Much love to YOU on YOUR journey of ‘arriving’ where you are right now… into the invitation to just keep feeling yourself, trusting that this is what truly takes you, with the most integrity possible, into your next phase of ‘service’ to self and others. ❤

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart facilitant, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

SoulFullHeart Museletter: Meeting Your Inner Orphan

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

It’s the latest release of our Museletter! Offering ALL of our writings, videos, events, healing offerings, and audio blogs for the last two weeks. Go read it here!

Go here to subscribe to receive these in your email inbox!

Meeting your ‘Inner Orphan’ part of you is a sacred process that has been coming up for many souls lately. In this issue’s featured article, SoulFullHeart Teacher/Facilitator, Raphael Awen, shares open-heartedly about his own experience with this process and how it opened out for him:

“I simply tuned in Yeshua as a beloved guide, and dialed in a Golden Earth setting, and there in the magical outdoors, was Yeshua crouched down about 8 or 10 feet away, holding upright a (soon to be) eager toddler, who he then let go, as this beautiful baby focused his gaze on me and began to take his first steps crossing the space between us. Midway across, the name Bartholomew came as plain as day. I received him into my arms, and he readily received me. I intuitively knew that this Bartholomew would change my life, that holding him would require all the rigors of true parenthood and presence of being that this Orphan would need to transmute the pain in his heart, allowing both him and I to shift our destiny and to embody what we intended when we set out on our journey of ‘leaving’ the Divine.”

There are quite a few NEW energy updates from these last two weeks from Jelelle Awen, including an audio blog sharing one of them, some personal process sharings from Kalayna Solais, and a deeper invitation into your own inner process of feeling from Raphael Awen.

Jelelle Awen continues her video series “Deepen 2020”. This series will be offered on an arising basis, rather than every day for a set period of time, and will be responsive to current events/cosmic energies/personal & collective process, etc. Every Deepen 2020 video will offer a teaching and a guided meditation. You can watch these on her Facebook page or our YouTube channel.

You can watch all podcast episodes on the SoulFullHeart Experience YouTube Channel or listen to the audio on the SoulFullHeart Soundcloud channel or iTunes channel.

Jelelle will be hosting the next virtual women’s group call over Zoom on Sunday, February 23rd, at 10am PST. The focus of this group will be on feeling and processing the sacred sisterhood wound. Women may feel a deep longing and familiarity in their soul around the goodness of connecting in bonds with soul and even birth sisters. Even with this longing, there is also the experience of these connections often resulting in competition/envy, not being seen/felt/appreciating and just overall sense of relational challenge to show up for them.

For more information on this and other upcoming events, visit: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/events

Raphael, a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for men and women, is now offering FREE 30-45 minute intro calls over Zoom to see how the SFH process and ongoing 1:1 sessions may support you on your healing and Ascension journey. Jelelle Awen is now working with women new to the SoulFullHeart process in 1:1 bridging sessions. More info here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Thank you so much for your interest in and support of SoulFullHeart Way of Life!

You can become a patron of SoulFullHeart through a one-time or monthly donation via our patreon page.

Check out the latest Museletter here

Meeting Your Inner Orphan

Published on by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

Photo courtesy of https://unsplash.com/@benwhitephotography

By Raphael Awen

What we relate to as suffering, the Divine is passionately interested in. Divinity knew bliss, but had no sense of challenge or difficulty; and thus, no movement.

We feel something as deeply moving because that something flows in between the familiar tension we hold in our being of bliss and it’s loss.

We are the Divine out experiencing movement, growth, challenge and difficulty, all of which the Divine couldn’t know or feel were it not for its choice and our souls agreement to individuate itself into many gods – you and I.

Yes, you and I are saddled with godhood. And this explains our base tones of anxiety and fear. We knew and hold in our being remembrance of there being no separation, no veil of forgetting, no sense of any paradise lost.

This past week, I had a very moving encounter where I felt that it was time for me to formally meet my Inner Orphan Self – this core aspect of my soul who holds all of these tensions; this core aspect of my soul, out of which is born in this life, the Inner Child and Inner Teenager – both of whom are shaped and formed from the Inner Orphan soul aspect.

I simply tuned in Yeshua as a beloved guide, and dialed in a Golden Earth setting, and there in the magical outdoors, was Yeshua crouched down about 8 or 10 feet away, holding upright a (soon to be) eager toddler, who he then let go, as this beautiful baby focused his gaze on me and began to take his first steps crossing the space between us. Midway across, the name Bartholomew came as plain as day. I received him into my arms, and he readily received me. I intuitively knew that this Bartholomew would change my life, that holding him would require all the rigors of true parenthood and presence of being that this Orphan would need to transmute the pain in his heart, allowing both him and I to shift our destiny and to embody what we intended when we set out on our journey of ‘leaving’ the Divine.

This ache of loss held in the Inner Orphan soul aspect is the juice and the portal back to full embodiment, full familiarity, full familial fidelity. We long to return to soar in the heavens and so the Divine gives us the role of parent, re-parenting our own soul aspects as the very portal back to that which we lost only in experience, reassuring us that we never lost the actual possession or birthright of our full godhood.

In the days that followed this experience, I have surely felt a conscious vulnerability and arising of base fears and anxieties, along with deep tears – feeling so small. I have also felt a ‘me’ there who could handle and show up for all of it, as well as the Divine’s confidence in me and gratitude to me for my desire and willingness – that even now as I write these words, I feel a welling up of this support and energy.

I offer support and space holding and process within session space as a SoulFullHeart facilitator to others who wish to undertake such a journey, but it isn’t from any expert place of one who has ‘healed’ their anxiety and thus who has transcended their anxiety, or their depression, or their fear, but rather as one who has welcomed their fear, anxiety and depression. Quite the opposite, at many times, embracing this portal into pain has left parts of me seriously wondering if I hadn’t bit off more than I could chew. I can tell you that time and time again, I continue to come out the other side into newfound joy and range of being – what I see and feel as real transmutation of my being. This in turn only appetizes me for more and makes any ‘attainment’ look and feel like kindergarten all over again as I feel like a bigger beginner every time some ground or embodiment is gained.

Isn’t that what is really to be expected in an infinite love reality? Any and all progress measurement is swallowed up by love’s infinity. You get to be in infinite love if you’re willing to give up your stamp of certification of being anything other than part of this infinity. Certificates only look good on really boring office walls anyway. I’d so much rather know and feel real adventure out in the forest, the city and Golden Earth, with Yeshua, the Divine Mother, and The Divine Father.

Look for me and Bartholomew out and about feeling love and life anew in many ways for the first time. His name meaning is ‘Son of the Ploughman’ which so surprised me as I felt the plough as that which opens and prepares the earth to receive seed – it is through our wounding that the divine seed enters – ensuring that we will never lose our way – even through the deepest loss imaginable. We are ensured that all consciousness is finding its way back to all that it ever was and even being expanded out to more in the process.

That kind of starts to explain the hell you’ve journeyed through, or quite possibly feel like you are journeying through right now, yes? Doesn’t this speak also to the part of you who is more set on only ‘moving forward’ who doesn’t want to cry over spilt milk, who doesn’t want to get lost again in the world of feeling? This part of you will also need your showing up to negotiate the exploration and true healing journey your soul came here to undertake.

My truth is that we all individuated out of the Divine and came here to feel it all, even to get lost in it, so that we could be found by love, and in so doing, be truly of the greatest service to all of love and life.

Thank you for feeling me and for feeling yourself. 🙂💚😇

Much love,
Raphael Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.Com/sessions

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our Patreon Page to send us love in the form of money: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart 🙂

Feeling Held By Divine Mother During Intense Life Transitions

Published on by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Solais

As usual, when the world on the outside feels intense and hard to be a part of, I feel the arms of Divine Mother enfolding us all… encouraging every one of us to go back inward and start there before we try and ‘do’ anything on the outside, for if we can come from love (especially of self) and not despair or disdain in our action-taking, we are miles, leaps, infinite bounds ahead of the intensity of collapsing timelines and the pain of what’s burning up still in 3D life and conditioning.

It occurred to me yesterday that often when my own life is shifting, I end up making choices that are somehow rooted in wanting to dismiss what ‘isn’t working’ anymore or to have an energy of disdain or even despair and disappointment leading the charge. I began to feel into this as the way that parts of me have ‘had to’ lead decision making oftentimes in the past. But, what if that doesn’t ‘have to’ be true anymore? What if now I can come from a heart that is FULL of trust and love, understanding that sometimes things don’t work out the way parts of me were picturing they would, but that ultimately my soul is leading something GOOD?

And, what if this is an invitation not only for me but for others too? Because if I’m feeling it for myself, it’s definitely something that is rumbling through the Oneness that connects us all…

I know for myself that making space to go back inward and collect the parts that are feeling upset, distraught, unsure, uneasy, etc, helps to settle the energies, remind them that I am here, that they are supported, that they can trust me and trust the Divine. If I don’t feel like I can hold a candle for easing the distress they might be feeling, then I’m not taking enough space to feel myself and to create that Haven/Heaven they need to lean into inside of me.

This is the template that Divine Mother provides us through absolutely everything we face and walk out. She offers too, much much context to lean into if we can be still long enough to hear and feel Her when things feel overwhelming and hard and when life is in upheaval. Patiently she waits by our side as we pick up the pieces of our breaking hearts. Openheartedly she holds compassionate space for what we are learning to hold space for in ourselves and what we are learning to create with Her, with love, in our outer worlds.

So often, even when I’m in the middle of a deep fog and A LOT of pain is coming up from whatever part/soul aspects I’m working with, I hear her say to me, “You are finding your way…” and even when it feels as if I’m not, I know and trust that I am.

“You are finding your way” can sometimes mean we are fumbling in the dark for a while trying to figure out how to turn on the light. It can sometimes mean stumbling upon ‘roadblocks’ on our way to realizing our desires. I’ve never felt Her say to me that I shouldn’t want what I feel I want. I have only ever felt Her encourage me (and especially my masculine aspect who is used to finding ways to just ‘get it done’) to keep surrendering to the timing and the overall unfolding, but not to dismiss the dream altogether, for the ‘how’ is far less important than the dreams of the heart and the overall journey of the soul that we really cannot help but be on.

Much love to you during these ‘Imbolc’ energies that feel like they are inviting transitions into new timelines, all held by Divine love and support…

Support is here in SoulFullHeart should you feel drawn to a session with Raphael or Jelelle Awen and there are many guided meditations that may help you as well on our Youtube channel: SoulFullHeart Experience.

Love,
Kalayna Solais

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart facilitant, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

 

Honouring Your Own Unique And Very Personal Journey Of Ascension

Published on by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

By Kalayna Solais

Feeling behind. Feeling as if we are risking being ‘left behind’ if we aren’t able to tune into what everyone else that shares awareness of Ascension is tuning into and feeling personally. Fearing that we aren’t going to be enough to ‘ascend’ or to be ‘chosen’ TO ascend, perhaps.

These are feelings that I think so many of us can resonate with on some level. These fears feel existential and like they live in our Metasoul aspects in other timelines who HAVE been ‘left behind’ by others and on a deeper level still, there’s more to feel about ‘abandonment’ by the Divine too… maybe also in this life parts of you have trauma from the ‘competition’ conditioning, from growing up in a culture where you are always striving to be THE best, not YOUR best or even just where you are at and having that be ok. There are so many layers to this and for me, I’m still discovering many of them personally and how deep they go.

I’m a part of a highly catalytic process and soul family community that we always say is on a ‘moving conveyor’. The more work you do within you, the more your outer world changes and the more shifts you feel invited to take of your own volition too. The more parts of you that you feel in their traumas and begin to have a relationship with, the more you realize the changes you need to make in your life in ALL areas of your life.

This means that at any time, one of us could decide unilaterally that there is something we need to address, move on from or move toward, and that could be a big thing or a small thing. There are always next and next and next steps too as the inner awakening and openings deepen. There are new discoveries and new strata of consciousness that begin to open up and out. New relationships are drawn. New alchemy on all levels. All of these are sacred journey markers that are very individual and a result of the individual journey. It look and feel like pure ‘magic’ and it really is, but it’s also worked very hard for.

When you have conditioning in your soul’s timelines and the heart of your parts from this lifetime that there is something always to envy in others for the sake of feeling badly or ‘not good enough’ inside of yourself, this isn’t that easy to digest all the time. Jealousy can be kicked up. A feeling that you must be lacking something or have something ‘wrong with you’ if you aren’t experiencing what they are experiencing. This is one of the major reasons why I needed the break I did…. so that this comparison dance and suffering loop could be deeply felt into by me, so that I could arise for myself with more respect and self-love. This could only happen if I got big enough for my most intense and self-punishing parts/aspects to lean into me. This was the crux of my process at times in relationship to the lives of others around me too… feeling parts of me envying their skills (that they’ve worked hard for), their fitness level, their relationships, etc. This has gone on and on for me for as long as I can remember… and only now is this starting to shift into new ground.

Why is it SO hard to just BE with our own journey? Why do we look to others for templating but then resent them for it at times?

These questions feel complicated and like the answers lie within every individual. I think it’s so hard to remember that we are ultimately here to experience Ascension in a PERSONAL way, though we are returning to oneness too. I’m discovering, especially as I feel a relationship beginning with a Reptilian aspect of me, just how deep this ‘programming’ of avoiding the individuation process of our healing and Ascension actually goes and why it can feel a bit scary.

I had a yoga teacher once, many years ago now, who offered something during class that made us all laugh but it was actually quite poignant. She was showing us the many stages of one particular posture. When she got to the most advanced one, she said,

“See? There’s NOTHING there! There’s no need to rush yourself into this ‘advanced’ place when you have so much to discover along the way”.

That really impacted me at that time and it remains with me today because I think I was supposed to take that in deeply for my own ongoing experience of spirituality and of life itself… it really IS about the journey and not the destination. Ascension is a journey. ‘5D’ is not really a destination so much as an invitation into a new frequency in which to anchor our consciousness as much and as often as we can. Every individual’s soul expression and attainments are their own, often worked for over multiple lifetime experiences and deep inner work too. There’s nothing left to ‘envy’ if we can see it this way… but there could be a lot to be inspired by!

Plus, our own journeys, when we have the space within to honour them, are proof positive of our own inner work and also the growth and healing phases that we personally need that are a reflection of our bigness in order to be with them. Maybe there is no ‘ultimate destination’ but in fact, it all keeps deepening and expanding from here. This is such a humble way to look at and hold ourselves and this whole Ascension process on a collective level too.

I wanted to share this bit about my own journey and discoveries as an expression of my own uniqueness that I’m learning to embrace more and more. I hope that it helps you feel more love and respect for your own too… for the journey you’re on as YOU.

Much love! ❤

Kalayna

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart facilitant, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.