Following Your Sacred Union Desires: Our Story

By Jelelle Awen ~

Ten years ago, I received an email from a man asking me to explore a relationship. As soon as I read his words, I felt my entire body flush with a warm, loving energy and an inner knowing. I already knew that this man’s heart and soul were SO big, generous, and powerfully good, that his intentions toward me were pure, and that his dedication to his own healing/awakening process through parts work matched my own. Before that time, parts of me couldn’t handle the mirror that he offered me of me and there just wasn’t enough self worth to claim our connection.

Finally, after three years of knowing each other, I felt a ‘yes’ to letting him in. I felt a ‘yes’ to seeing where the reflection of ME that he offered would take me.

THAT exploration and THAT man have brought me more joy, goodness, reflection, growth, and stepping into my own bigness than I ever could have imagined! Our union expands and deepens each day, with new grounds of co-leadership and collaboration continuing to open out and offer surprisingly meaningful gifts to ourselves and others!

Thank you to my BEloved, Raphael Awen, for every moment since then and all the future ones to come! I’m so glad I said ‘yes’ and I’m so grateful that you pursued what you wanted!

~

By Raphael Awen

Ten years ago, my life took another big turn.

Today is Jelelle and I’s ‘nibble on cheese’ anniversary. I sent Jelelle an email that said ‘Would you like to connect soon? We could be like two mice nibbling on cheese.’ I knew it sounded a bit cheesy, but I was determined to be unedited and to be okay with whatever the outcome. In the three years prior, I’d brought her an attraction two other times, and though I accepted and respected the ‘no’ that came back, that didn’t stop me from trying again when another attraction arose. This time, I got a different response.

Today, I live in an ongoing honeymoon phase; a ‘pinch me’ reality. Is this really true? How can this be? What button did I push to make this happen? (part of me is still asking)

This woman who lived ten hours and a country away from was in my orbit to see occasionally over a three year period, but now, for the last ten years she’s hardly more than 25 feet away 24/7/365. We’ve left two countries behind, have plans for many more and can’t wait to walk into the next moments together to feel and experience what wants to be felt and experienced through us.

I so believe that one of the deepest things we came here to earth for, and that we chose human being experience for, was to be willing to enter the place of strong desire; to surrender and be vulnerable to having intense wants. Wanting a sacred romance is probably one of the biggest desires we can surrender to. I feel this to be true, because once you enter the sacred romance, it will call you to deeper and deeper desire and vulnerability and it won’t stop.

Your desire to admit what you want, to never deny it, even if you get told ‘no’, will be the stuff you’ll need to actually walk out the having of what you desire. Your willingness to long and pine for what you don’t have and find really hard to see anywhere in sight, will be what enables you to draw that.

You too, can have it all, for nothing more than the willingness to want it, and want it and want it some more.

~

Raphael and Jelelle Awen are Ascension Guides, Sacred Union Mates and Teachers, SoulFullHeart Facilitators/Co-Creators/Teachers. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, writings, and videos with them.

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Our Love-Style: A Sacred Union Poem

By Kalayna Colibri

Love… this love we’ve found together, we already are.

These movements we inhabit together,
inside our USness
and inside our ISness,
are ones that bring along
new surprises and prizes.

Beloveds we are,
remembering we have been,
and in this next Now moment,
we find the bond over again
in a deeper sea than before…

The quake and shake
of our Sacred Union dance together
is a treasure to hold and behold
and an opening-out
of our brightest timeline possibilities…
starting, always, within…
flowing together
in a style all our own.

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 35, emoto-spiritual teacher, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

As Our Union Remembers, We Remember Too: A Poem About Sacred Union

by Kalayna Colibri

 

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There is so much to discover, recover, with you.

As I am uncovered,

lover…

and uncover you too.

 

The defenses shake and shimmy their way

into a thousand streams of this fencepost and that wall…

yet love is there to undermine it all.

 

Our union breathes

and brings with it the tides of times

Ancient, current, steady.

 

I see the breezes of aeration

and timelines in meditation

waiting for our reach to hold

the ones we’ve been waiting for

all this time.

 

And together we remember

what these mountains of relationship

have always been called

by soul-times remembered

and lived out all at once.

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

From A Bud To A Flower: Sweet Sacred Union Beginnings

by Kalayna Colibri

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That feeling of being in his arms… finding our way back to each other, after years of being in and out of relationship together, depending on what parts of us needed.

The letting in of his kiss… the swirl of the softness and stillness I feel in me in the receiving, that is echoed somehow in his masculine sacred King.

The exploration of sacred sexuality… the dedication and passion that opens out in every curve, every pore, letting emotions rise and fall and tears wash away the remnants of painful times, phases of less connection from heart to soul to body and back again.

So much moves in and through as I walk out each conscious moment with Gabriel. We have traversed so much terrain together over the last 5 years, sometimes in a romantic bond, other times not. This time feels more real and realistic too… though we cannot ever ‘know’ and can only feel what’s true in the moment.

Sacred Unions… they don’t happen by chance. They happen as we continue the work we are so committed to within. That commitment and that cultivated love that comes from it, flows in concert with another when we are ready for it to, the timing of which is not exactly up to us. The timing of anything truly special and unique moving into our lives is not up to us or parts of us, though parts may try and sabotage or avoid it, or work extra hard to ‘keep’ it. Love is a flowing river that gets to be shared with others once your own flow is in enough abundance that it can. Until then, your filling up love-flask needs your attention only.

Everyone can do ‘work’ on themselves and draw different sorts of mates to them… yet I don’t know of any other work that draws Sacred Unions in the way this path of SoulFullHeart does. Working with parts and soul aspects is instrumental to the understanding of who you are and have been in relationship as well as who you could become. It is an incredible way to get to know a partner too and to let them know you. It is an unending path of discovery and re-arising for each other, again and again and again. Nothing can stay the same for long, for there can be no stagnancy in this work. As you heal and awaken, your partner is asked to go with you and you with them, frequently changing the ground of the relationship. Nothing at all can become ‘boring’ in this sort of relationship, where the mirror is constantly there, though sometimes at very awkward angles, and you are invited to care as much if not more about YOU as you do about the other.

I am blessed to be where I am with Gabriel right now… the experiences of deepenings and openings too, that come sometimes on the other side of tension and process both together and separately too. We have frequencies of all sides of relationship… best soul friend, deep heart lover, hot body talk and sexuality, sweet tears of feeling one another, times of merging, times of feeling separate. There is so much here to feel and be and be in. I am blessed, yet we have both worked hard to be at this level of process too, where we can let this bond in… though there are parts of us that resist it at times, that can feel how challenging this sort of relationship can be, that would perhaps rather just be single. Yet the hearts of both of us are committed to this NOW and the next NOW, allowing the romance to arise and move as it needs to, with no knowledge of how long it could last, and no expectations around this, though there are conscious desires too.

To be in a budding and emerging Sacred Union is a gift that comes with a process, that comes with yummies and challenges, both. And without this healing path called SoulFullHeart that holds and calls to each of us continually, we would be caught up in a net of unmoveable binds instead of illuminating bonds that can heal these binds. This is one of the golden trophies we hold very sacredly in SoulFullHeart… the light at the end of a long tunnel of necessary singlehood, that has also been held as good and sacred and blessed. Sacred Union is worth the precipice and trust fall within that allows you to let YOU in and eventually another too. And it is one of the most profound gifts of our sacred humanity expressing in conscious duality. ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

 

Eclipse Energies Bring A Renewed Sense Of The Sacred Masculine Dance

by Kalayna Colibri

 

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The Eclipse energies are bringing out something NEW in the masculine. It is trying to birth a new sense of what the ‘sacred masculine’ is, which has felt elusive and puzzling, not to mention hard to define. Any definitions we’ve tried to say are ‘it’ have tended to fall short most of the time, for it is still being rediscovered, along with the sacred feminine. It calls for men who are able to embody its messiness of heart and truth on this path of rediscovery. It calls for women to feel it within themselves as a counterpart to the budding inner feminine. The wounded masculine is alive within us all to some degree, until it has really been felt for the protection it has wanted and needed to offer and the tiredness it is feeling more and more as it realizes it IS wounded and does need our love and healing…

This healing can and does happen, the more we hold the desire for it too. It is so much of what needs to be felt and healed in our world as we ‘kNOw’ it today. It is expressed in the ways we claim to ‘know’ what we cannot in many ways, mental approaches to spirituality that do not ask us to embody it and feel it deeply inside of our hearts as arising sacred humans, and it is our okayness and also thirst for war and battles in any way, shape or form. It is expressed too, through our outrage, through our self-image creation and maintenance, through our push-aways from our hearts and the hearts of others, through the walls parts of us have built around us, wanting to contain and protect was is precious within, wanting to keep itself from being felt for what it truly is.

We see and feel it in our leaders and our leadership inside of us too. We feel it in our sexuality, our desires for dominance (though as woman, perhaps this is more subtle or takes a different form than it does for men), our pushing and action-based lives we’ve led. It is something that shows up often in our daily lives, especially when we have not begun to really see it and feel it.

Perhaps this current Eclipse will help bring in more illumination of this inside of you and inside of others. I am feeling it for myself today and these words are what I want to offer the masculine inside of me, inside of you, and inside of all men…

~

To the renewing, emerging, strengthening Sacred Masculine, within AND outside of me…

I invite you into a dance. A dance less structured than a waltz, and as passionate as a tango. I want to fill my dance card with the names of men (and eventually, only ONE man) who feel the pull, the desire, for themselves, for me, for us. I want unchoreographed, spontaneous steps, sometimes in alignment with each other, at other times not. I want the mess of the self-discovery that has us at times wondering how on Earth we’re going to navigate this one, though we both have the gumption, the desire, the courage to keep going inside as the only option.

I want something I can grab a hold of, without tugging or being tugged on. Something that is concrete yet has breathing and fluidity and room for what IS along with what could be and what we both want, starting with what we want inside of ourselves.

The games of old, those ones we never wanted to play anyway, they are being asked to crumble inside of us. They are being set to fall away in avalanches of pure love and sacred union codes coming in, that so do not resonate or match the currently embraced picture of romantic relationship, which is steeped in much emotional and spiritual immaturity and unrealness.

I want to let it all, all we’ve thought we ‘knew’, fly away with the wind in poignant moments of sorting through this from that within each of us and within ‘us’ too. I want to unlearn and relearn it all with you. I want to feel it all bubbling up and bursting within me and within us, and play it all like notes and chords on piano keys, bringing it all to the fore of our relationship ground, that place where it’s safe to do so and yet the precipice of where it could all fall apart (and in phases, needs to) is always there too.

I see you, I feel you, I know you… I trust the heart that is arising and reconciling inside of you, sometimes with contention and male ‘UMPH’. Ugh. YES. The line of abuse cannot be reached by a heart that is working towards its purity and holds deep reverence, respect, love, care, for itself and me too.

I want any resistance that’s here within you, within me, to BE pushed up, to be felt, to be held, to be loved, to be ultimately moved. I do not want the resistance to become the relationship, the reason to slow it all down. I want our parts to know, feel, understand that you are there for them, for your own, that I am there for them, for my own.

I want the genuine, the real, the incredibly HOT sacred masculine that arises from deep within the shadows and caves of the real, the soulful, the heartful, that doesn’t caretake, the penetrates in all the ways it needs to, that mates and creates and brings its truth, even if its truth isn’t polished or perfect or even UNDERSTOOD fully. I want the shit storms. Yes. The masculine in ME wants that, wants to be pressed up, pushed on, noticed, healed, moved, so that the feminine that so wants to dance with it and with YOU can arise more and more as the climate shifts to one where it can, where it is safe to, where it isn’t expected to battle, to be an Amazon, to outrage, but to encourage, to be, to heal, to offer

I want the ‘shit storms’. Yes. The masculine in ME wants that, wants to be pressed up, pushed on, noticed, healed, moved, so that the feminine that so wants to dance with it and with YOU can arise more and more as the climate shifts to one where it can, where it is safe to, where it isn’t expected to battle, to be an Amazon, to outrage, but to encourage, to be, to heal, to offer healing, to LOVE, to have her stillness that is born from an elegant blossom grown in mud and fun too. I want those portals the masculine and feminine are meant to create together, to bring out from each other, to step into in love that is made in the physical and other levels too. And you’ll know if you can do this, by your reaction to these words, that yes, I do feel are coming from a masculine AND a feminine inside of me too. Somehow, I trust that if you’re meant to, you’ll get this. Your maturity will resonate with it and your heart and soul that desire to FEEL and to HEAL and to make genuine, heart open love that travels to the Cosmos and back again with a woman is what you’ll feel now.

This is not coming from a woman who has solely been burned, been victimized, been abused, though of course that lies in this woman’s heart and body’s history with men who haven’t embodied the sacred masculine before or really even tried (save one, who to this day I still heal with consistently and we help each other move a lot, even just as dear friends). My stories of these experiences are not an attachment, though they also live in my Metasoul as well as my emotional and physical bodies. Nothing inside of me is asking you to heal it for me. Nothing inside of me needs you to be something you’re not, for what you ARE, IS the journey for me and for you.

I feel ready. I feel ready to take on something new. I feel ready for what can only move and heal in monogamous, romantic relationship. I feel a new relationship arising to my own inner masculine that wants to become more of the sacred masculine too, and at the same time, I feel my feminity wanting to arise more and more, to be in the space with me more, to feel safer there than she ever has. To share this with a man, who is also feeling inside of himself a feminine counterpart that wants to arise and heal and be, along with a masculine that wants to do the driving, to lead himself to more healing on a REAL level, to be in deep sacred union mateship with a woman that he sees and feels as body, heart, AND soul and wants to claim with all of his being as she claims him with all of hers, THIS is the dream, this is the desire that is bursting from me today. And this is the ongoing invitation, perhaps right now more than ever before with these Solar Eclipse energies coming in and illuminating, shifting, driving us to more and more healing on levels that maybe we could not have imagined before.

My inner masculine and feminine, who are trying to reconcile something with each other in this moment, it feels like, thank you for taking this in right now. They thank you for welcoming their passion, their unknown about themselves that they are looking to discover, their desire to feel it all. Thank you… and I welcome you into this powerful sense of passionate discovery and rediscovery for yourself too.

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Sacred Union Is Calling And Inviting Us To Respond With Love

By Jelelle Awen

 

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It is lying in bed with him, my head on his chest…the perfect fleshy pillow seemingly shaped just for me. It is sharing, always sharing, what is moving in my heart and my soul for it to land in his accepting embrace. It is so many early mornings of this, where I land in self AS I land in him AS I land in our Usness.

It is THIS sacred union that brings me into self, introduces me to self over and over as it CALLS me into a higher self version to serve love from the overflow. It is THIS calling that my heart responds to with vulnerability. It is this calling that my soul responds to with awakening. It is this calling that my body responds to with longing. It is this calling that my mind responds to with inspiration.

It is the feminine form of me leaning into the masculine form of him. The polarity and duality dance of our gender-based edges merging and BEcoming and touching and entwining. The dance that creates and alchemizes a NEW energy that wouldn’t be possible without each of us as the partners and creators. My side and his side and then in the middle where our energies meet is this union…..two “I’s” coming together to create a “We” without losing our sense of self.

It is the letting go of the conditioned IDEAS of relationship, romance, and union….letting go of the templating and modeling that we received. Letting go of what doesn’t serve the love to move between us and LETTING IN the essence of us that BEcomes the love more and more. The inner father and the inner mother held and identified and felt so that we can arise beyond these roles into the frequencies of TRUE king and queen BEloveds.

It is THIS queen inside of you that is waiting, ready, growing, choosing. She is getting her inner nest ready to receive these tones of sacred union into her world. She is responding to what FEELS like what she most deeply wants and letting go of ALL that IS not, even as it can be so painful to do so. She is inviting sacred union of self into her life to overflow this energy of invitation OUT to her mate, as her inner frequencies of self love increase so does the strength of HER beacon.

It is THIS king inside of you that is pursuing, activating, growing, choosing. He is getting his inner kingdom ready to hold these tones of sacred union into his world. He is activating around what FEELS like what he most deeply wants and letting go of ALL that IS not, leading the necessary completions or explorations. He is inviting sacred union of self into his life to overflow this energy of invitation OUT to his mate…..as his inner frequencies of self love empowerment increase so does the strength of HIS beacon.

It is this sacred union for which we are ALL being invited to explore, to join, to feel, and to experience. The explorations of our inner unions of feminine and masculine and the OUTER expression of it from one awakening heart, body, mind, soul WITH another in the service of love with love and BY love.

Please join us for a group call this saturday, May 13th at 11:11amCST withRaphael Awen and I exploring this ground of sacred union through teachings, a guided meditation (to connect with your sacred feminine and masculine frequencies within and with the higher self of your sacred union mate), and individual sharings:https://www.facebook.com/events/1320873934656373/ or soulfullheartwayoflife.com/groupcalls

~

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine and union facilitator, soul scribe, waySHOWer, galactic love ambassador, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book,Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

We Will Know Each Other, Love

by Leena Colibri

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We will know each other, love.
When the seas of distance
have long parted
and the winds of inner guidance
bring us closer,
we will know the scent, feel and taste
of the radiant compliment and heart echo,
that only two true lovers
can feel in each other.
The swan of my garden’s pond,
the stag of your kingdom to come
and the lushness of crystalline hearts
sends a beacon to one another
that forgoes all time
and draws the curtain
on any sense of having waited.
Across the ether
where dutiful pleasantries end
and all flowers bloom in harmonic,
perfectly imperfect growth,
that is where it begins for us
as we foresake all we’ve known
for the challenge of walking
and waking
together.
The sprint of a spring-loaded heart
wanting to explode in its body-container
brings in the steps of inventive goodness
and charges forward with each breath
of its renewed awakening.
Our inter-galactic heavens
of sweet spent moments
of movement and healing
in our dominions of the inside,
mingle altogether in a dance of dimensions,
bodies,
anticipated touches
and soaring passionate highs.
We will so know each other, love,
by the shape of smoky outlines
and bright, burning stars pointing the way,
calling out to us and to all lovers,
now and always…

 

**

Leena Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator, writer and poetess. Find out more about the SoulFullHeart Way of Life at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

Making Heart Room For Your Mate To Enter Your Life

By Jelelle Awen

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Raphael and Jelelle Awen

I felt him before we were together. I could lay in my bed and feel his arms around me, sense his heart beat flowing along to mine. I had conversations with him that were so provoking, the deepest of context, the most enlivening of content. My laughs responded to his smile, his wit, his humour with absolutely no meanness. All of his passionate energy focused on me, I unfolded in his arms and in his heart gaze, over and over returning to the essence of me through what he could see.

This is how it felt for me even before Raphael and I began dating each other eight and half years ago. Many nights before we went on our first date, I could feel his energy in my field as my ‘next and probably most important mate’. I didn’t know that it was him specifically but feeling into it now, it is so clear that it WAS him. And similar to how a pregnant mother begins building a nest for her new baby, I started to build a nest in my heart and in my life getting ready for him.

This all feels so romantic, this story of falling in love and being in love and arising in love, even many ‘years’ later still we are falling in love together. And, it is, yes, romantic. Yet, also, love like this with what is truly your heart, soul, and body mate is a challenging crucible. Often when this kind of love enters your life, much has to be let go of in order to let it in. All the furniture of your old life gets rearranged in rapid fire. Relationships get sorted out fast. How are you are going to let this intense new energy into your life? How are you going to make room? What fits with this soaring new enlivening, heart opening, and soul expanding frequencies and what doesn’t?

For example, within weeks of starting to date each other, Raphael and I experienced the collapse of the spiritual practice, paradigm, and group that we had been deeply involved with for many years and within which we met each other. I was a facilitator of this work for years, deeply committed to my process as was Raphael. And then, we were challenged to choose our new emerging love over that which we had previously placed our devotion, the group.

The choice was easy in one way as my heart and soul just knew there was no going back out of this kind of love. A love I had been wanting for so very long. So, I said ‘yes’ even without knowing if it would continue to open out between Raphael and I. All of the people in the group, my deepest and closest soul family at the time, no longer would be in relationship with me, so I had to let go overnight of so many previously very meaningful connections…..and of the paradigm and process which had felt like my soul purpose path. The heartbreak of this spiraled me into a dark night of the soul where I literally felt like I was splintering into many pieces, going crazy, and the only heartrails I could feel were the incredibly touching love with Raphael and a supportive frequency of support from the Divine.

Many other shifts and changes have come and been chosen over the years, catalyzed by the love that moves between Raphael and I. Geography, relationships, money earning, belief systems…we have let it ALL go many times over the years. Yet, we have always let go of it together. And, in some moments, we have uncomfortably held the possibility that our union too is complete and that we need to let go of it. Always our own individual growth is primary and comes first. Fortunately, so far, our togetherness has served our growth and so we keep on finding our way together.

My heart is opening in this moment in large part because of what I experience with Raphael on a daily basis. We are two individuals, yes, and we are also within a union of feminine and masculine. This, I believe, is truly possible for anyone who is awakening and healing their heart and soul woundings to open their capacity to give and receive love. This process sends your beacon out into the world, which your mate hears and feels.

I do believe mates are ‘already within each other’ as the poet Rumi offers. So it is inevitable that yours will find you and you will find them. And, most likely, your life will change in very significant ways once you do. In the meantime, you can prepare your heart and soul through truly getting to know yourself. Building your nest out of self love and beaconing your heart out to the world. Letting go already of that which does not serve the Infinite Love in sacred human expression that you ARE in preparation for the stunning reflection of your bigness that is to come.

Jelelle Awen is an ascending teacher, Divine scribe, and co-creator-teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information.