With all the current energies coming in and sending our emotional and spiritual bodies into psychic turbulence, there is a real need and desire to find a way to deal with and comprehend it all. That feels like a big distinction to me. To ‘deal with’ or to ‘comprehend’. I remember when I was feeling so much emoto-spiritual pain years ago all a part of me really wanted was to find a way to feel better. Whatever it took. Looking for band-aids. But when there is a hemorrhaging going on at the core, a band-aid doesn’t help in the long term.
There are so many ways that we can manage our internal earthquakes. I don’t judge them one way or the other. It is what we are using them for that is where we get our power and ‘biggest bang for our buck’ so to speak. This is where we move from dealing to comprehending. Where we really want to get to a root of understanding and feeling what and who we are BOTH as emotive and spiritual beings.
This a new frontier of our evolution. Not just to fix ourselves to feel better, to alleviate pain, but to actually go IN to the pain. To navigate the murky, yet beautiful waters of our deeper woundings. This is not just therapeutic work! It is not meant to alleviate, but illuminate and generate a new power structure withIN you. Not just be a victim looking for solutions, but a fully empowered being that is looking for conscious sovereignty. One who is seeking to unravel a mystery to integrate the gifts that are earned through the sometimes difficult to feel world of exploring the shadow.
It is through the power of your own authority and the integrity of another’s experience in this journey that a co-creation can arise that brings both into a trust ground that actually brings the kinds of healing your soul is actually calling for. The kinds of changes that are needed for real growth and sustained goodness rooted in the soil of your shadow. By feeling the part of you that is protective of your goodies is the key to the further ground of this ever deepening awakening.
We have all been through our own crucibles and difficult choice points. We have discovered new vistas inside of ourselves that want to be shared with others and the world. It is more than just feeling good, it is feeling alive and aware of the vast potential within us that is in ever growing curiosity and expansion. I feel the amazing growth and awarenesses that have occurred in those that have been in the process of real Self discovery. I am here to serve that as I continue to be that for myself and my own growth. It is an open invitation to understand and become more than you ever felt possible.
It is love seeking itself through you and it just needs some help to get to where it wants to be felt, even when it might hurt like hell. You have someone there to be there with you through it all.
Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual teacher, men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.
Sometimes I share about current energies and it is a download from my higher self/angelic aspects/Divine Source that describes more of a collective experience. I am more like a NOW caster, sharing what MAY be happening for many souls on the ascension and awakening path at the emotional body, soul, and physical levels. With these messages, it is not always personally happening for me as I may have cleared those aspects in my Metasoul field already or healed it in my emotional body. It’s not that I am ‘done’ with healing, it’s just that I am in a different phase perhaps having been on this path for awhile and starting ‘ahead of the curve’ in some cases, signing up to be an early adopter.
Yet, THIS phase of where the energy seems to be bringing many of us, I AM also strongly feeling and experiencing myself. I spent yesterday in space holding for myself and some healing and BEing with one of my core wounds that I haven’t felt triggered in awhile yet life set up the perfect storm of situations for it to come up. I didn’t come to our group call yesterday to BE with me and the Metasoul aspect that seemed most connected to this wounding, Mareeka, who is an Atlantian aspect. Her Atlantis timeline and my current one are bleeding through to each other in ways that I have not experienced before (another aspect of what these energies are offering us.) So, the core wounding for me in my emotional body AND as a Metasoul theme for me is around ‘rejected daugher’ or ‘unloved daughter’ for which my soul gave me plenty of opportunities to feel this life…I have been ‘working’ this one for many years in many layers and ways and I was grateful to be able to move another piece of it yesterday.
Through my personal experience and what I’m witnessing in others, I feel THIS is a phase of going into these wounds in a more ‘real’ way than many souls may have before. I offer in the video below about how these high frequencies of photonic light, intense cosmic activities, and PURE love waves are pushing up woundings in our emotional bodies and Metasouls to be felt, healed, and LOVED and how to BE with all this through parts work.
This process is continuing and seems to be accelerating. MUCHO accelerating. CORE wounds are different than energy tones and that we might identify as emotional reactions or emotional moods. I believe they exist in our emotional bodies and our individual, personal Metasouls yet, also, in the collective emotional body and Metasouls.
CORE wounds run DEEP…..very deep. In my experience, they cannot really be made into a part or subpersonality as we do with other frequencies such as depression, rage, anxiety, control, etc. They are visceral, without language, they ooze OUT and WITH the frequencies for which they have been formed. They are beyond the mind, cannot be talk therapied or hypnotized or cleared through energy sessions (although these things can help.) The main way to heal them seems to be the continual connection to the outer and downstream expression of them, which is the persona aspects such as the Inner Child, Inner Protector, Inner Punisher, Inner Teenager, 3D Self, Inner Matriarch/Patriarch, etc.
It is connecting with these persona aspects and getting separation between them and YOU (your soul self, authentic self, higher self coming into body) through verbal dialogue, written journaling, creative visualization that then clears enough ‘out of the way’ for the CORE wounding to come up. This is the process SoulFullHeart facilitators bridge to you during sessions and the ‘work’ you do on your own as differentiation only happens INside you and not through others, although a guide through this murky and sometimes difficult terrain, who is going through it themselves, can be critical.
As this separation happens from these persona aspects…..THEN you can begin to feel the CORE wounds that lie beneath. Deep pools of oozing CORE unworthiness, disconnect, abandonment. These words don’t really suffice as descriptions, yet they are the closest that we have. When these CORE wounds finally come up after much self love holding space AND differentiation/negotiation with the persona parts, there isn’t much that can be DONE but to feel and BE with it. There may be stories and scenes associated with these CORE wounds coming up but, often, there is not. There may be connections to this life, childhood experiences with birth family and especially parents, but this often the surface stuff.
The deep dive into this CORE wounding is what we seem to be supported to GO INTO with these high frequencies of loving light. With a more palatable sense of our ethereal guides/aspects, we are able to feel more safety to go there then we have before. It was easier to be distracted before by the ‘surface stuff’ of reactions and triggers and projections. Still, many souls are being distracted by these things and NOT going deeper to feel how this lives inside of their emotional bodies. Yet, for those who are open to going within, THIS seems to be the time and phase to do so and there are MANY rewards for doing so, the biggest one being the OPENING of your upper heart to receive and give love with self and others.
I feel that these CORE wounds can be bypassed and often ARE by many, even those who are teachers and WAYshowers. And, that’s ok, in a way, because there is still service of love coming through the parts of them that are ‘in charge’ of the BEing and aren’t ready or wanting to go there yet. I’m just here to bring and offer a bridge through SoulFullHeart to these deeper spaces and especially to and with those souls that FEEL there are woundings in them that they want to FINALLY feel and heal in their emotional bodies and Metasouls and want to offer this healing to others too. The feeling is usually that a ‘ceiling’ of some kind has been reached on awakening and especially related to the emotional body.
ALL this talk of CORE wounds does not mean that we are broken or need fixing. We HAVE wounds, yet we are NOT actually our woundings. It can SEEM that way when they remain hidden away, yet exist as an underground operating energy in so many areas of life, impacting so many areas of our lives. Our Infinite Love essence can illuminate and hold these woundings and invite them to integrate and into the light of Love that we ARE!
Yesterday I began painting for the first time in a couple of months. Since I was a young boy, visual art in the form of drawing, coloring, and painting has always been a source of pleasure and expression for me. It has also been a source of suffering by way of inner criticism and perfectionism. So much desire to create beauty for the eyes and heart to take in and be moved by. I feel a soul passion when I start to create and a plethora of reaction that offer me doorways into my wounding. So it feels like a romance in a way with a ton of grist and possibility.
When I am in the “zone”, time disappears. I am in flow and it feels like my essence is coming out to play. After being in that space, I could feel a reaction to being “outside” of it. Like that feeling went away and I couldn’t get it back. I lost the mojo and the only way to get it back was to start painting again. I can feel that like a drug reaction. I began to feel how a part of me was relating to the experience and not the “whole” me. The Gabriel that relates to the act of painting as a part of a larger “painting” that is being created by my Higher Self in all moments of each “day”.
We are Creators. We are Artists of exquisite talent and power…regardless of what we consider to be artistic. Right now I am creating. My words are manifesting a vibration of energy that is being sent out into the cosmic canvass. They may land in someone or not. They my have impact or disinterest. But either way I am creating something in this moment. I am feeling myself as I type and that is altering my experience of who I am. I am feeling a different relationship to my world in the moment. Something will reflect back to me my energy and I will get to feel that and be changed again.
There are times when a brush stroke will land away from an intended space and the order of what a part of me was expecting just became disorder. It just got messy and something comes up for me to feel. I can see it as a mistake or as something to learn from and see it is meant to stay a part of the creation. Maybe I am offered a new vision, and new pathway to create something totally different and unexpected. Something I just couldn’t see or feel beforehand. My consciousness just shifted and I grew from it.
In this awareness, I feel I have a choice. A choice to be in my reaction and let it take me where I need to go even if it is messy, or I can hold and feel what part of me is energizing this emotion and see what it is want to message to me. Neither which is wrong. Both are creating and informing. There are no mistakes in art as there are none in growth.
So let that brush go! Let it follow your intuitive heart. Make lines and splashes. Realize that you are the one that is in your full power of choice. If your tapestry feels like it is in disarray, there is a part of you that is creating that to get your attention. It is responding to the chaos within. If you are wanting more, see that more and feel your way through the perceptions that can’t let in that more. To be great creators means we take on great responsibility for what we create. It is time for us to paint a new picture of what we feel is possible and turn it into probable and let it become likely until it is definitely.
Create a bigger and grander picture for yourself that goes beyond what parts of you have been conditioned to believe and expect. This is done through being with and feeling the parts of you that have been capped due to many personal experiences and collective memes. We are powerful individually, but exponentially so collectively. Let us consciously create a new world together full of magic and color!
If you are curious to be a part of a creative healing community that is committed to letting in all that we can infinitely be, please join us on our next group call this Saturday at 11:11 CST. You can go to http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/groupcalls for more information.
Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual teacher, men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.
This week’s Museletter is busting at the seems from the love that wants to make its way to your heart! The featured article by Jelelle Awen digest the recent crop circle creation in Cley Hill, England. She takes the meaning in through the SoulFullHeart perspective and applies it to our own personal and collective disclosures of deep healing. We are all One, and as we each make our own personal journeys we are thereby effecting the greater whole. The graphic representation shows us that we are all connected in an infinite world and we are being supported by the various beings that have a deep love for us and our ascension.
Included is more information about our call this Saturday at 11:11 CST on Zoom. We will be discussing the 7 Key areas of life that we focus on in SoulFullHeart and how they are experienced in the 3rd, 4th, and 5th dimensions. If you cannot make this one, more info about future calls is included.
This week we had a huge output of writing and a lot to digest as a community and personally. A lot is moving and shifting in our world and that can bring up many reactions, both of joy and not so joyous. It is what gives us the experience to learn and grow from that we then share with you from our open hearts.
There is also a new energy update from Jelelle about how the incoming codes are creating compression points inside of us that are needing to be held and felt to release and integrate into new layers of consciousness.
So from all of us at SoulFullHeart we offer you another week’s worth of our passion and purpose, sprinkled with a ton of love. Thank you so much for taking this is in each week. If you feel that what we are offering has been giving you much reflection and guidance, we would love to feel your gratitude through a Love Donation through our website or through our Patreon page where you can even offer a monthly contribution.
Have a great weekend and may love continue to work its way into your world!
Many worlds you live in and walk in and BE in. Many versions of you show up for each of these worlds. There are the masks to slip on and wear as needed….each ‘world’ requiring something different in energy, tone, response. You ‘put it on’, you wear it even as it wearies you more and more to be worn like this. You are like a quick change artist, perhaps shifting without consciousness into new OUTfits many times a day.
All these different worlds leave you stretching over the gaps between who you really ARE and what they EXPECT you to be. The formfitting happens from parts of you that know so well how to do this and have become experts at conforming in this way. Part of you has become a camouflage creature, able to become just like ANY environment that you are in. You can become the color of the social scenery around you, blend right in. This was the order of the day to survive; this is 3D life that requires a heightened sense of self preservation that is about NOT being yourself, yet about being like EVERYONE else.
You start to wake up from your sleep walk. You start to SEE through each of these worlds. You visit the sets and stages. You begin to recognize the props and costumes that you are required to wear. You feel where continual suffering is the badge of entry in and the energy needed to remain. You see the others that were once close to you start to fade from your interest as they stay invested in these worlds and you begin to pull out. They may grab at you and you may go back, in a push-pull and mixed feelings conflictual dance with many things learned on both sides.
Sometimes, you feel like a ghost walking once familiar and comforting hallways that can no longer provide you a place to BE in solid form. Sometimes, you feel like a bull dozer, purposely collapsing these worlds and your place in them….clearing the way for the NEW. Sometimes you are a phoenix…rising from the ashes of all this fiery wreckage to BE reborn without constraints or limits. Sometimes you are a little child, just sobbing in the corner as you wait for a parent to take your hand and show you the way home.
There are no straight lines to follow or linear directional paths to navigate this shifting and sorting out of your worlds. Increasing LOVE for yourself and with others and with the Divine provides heartlines that you can use to navigate in the lost moments. The heartlines disappear at times too, as they are meant to as these are the moments where you inner strength truly grows.
You are free falling into the abyss of lost self identity as the roles fall away, along with the attachments and the rules and expectations too. Yet you begin to trust more and more that you will land on the soft soil of your own soul’s kNOWing and into the arms of the Divine. You begin to find your home. You more often return to love as THIS is the world that offers the most nourishment. And, you start to remember how always will you return, eventually, to the love that you actually ARE!
I was sitting down and feeling the need to reconnect to myself as so much has been moving and shaking that last few weeks. There are times when a part of me can get a bit caught up in all the shiftings that I can loose track of ME sometimes. So I gave myself a moment to come back to me and listen to what came.
Just sit….there is nothing to “do” but “be”. Be in your body. Be the moment. Let the thoughts of before and after flow in and out. Let them fall to the ground like leaves in Autumn’s presence. Observe them. Let the tree of your essence bare itself to you. Be naked. Be unadorned. Be in the peace of this Now. Nothing to solve. Nothing to accomplish. Nothing to complete. It has all been solved, accomplished, completed. It is only your over-mentalized 3D Self that is needing the clarification, classification, and valuation. It is not wrong. Just conditioned to everything it has learned in this density in order to survive and hide.
This has been a gift to you, believe it or not. It has offered you the ground of choice and voice. Of creation and destruction. It has been a battleground until you have been able to learn to let it be your playground. Much is moving and shifting in this expanded Now moment. You are changing on levels you can’t quite comprehend right now. It is okay. Your only job, if you want to call it that, is to feel. Feeling is the evidence that you are BEing, living, growing. What you produce or consume, other than love, is all ultimately and illusion. However, to a part of you, it is a very real one at that.
It is okay to stop. To take in the moment. What is real in both joy and pain? In weakness and in strength? You are a magical being that is moving mountains even as you type. As you eat. As you sleep. You do not have to understand it all or be conscious of it all for it is happening. You are happening. To get closer to it you only need to feel and receive. Let in the guidance and love that surrounds you in any given moment for you are the lungs and the breath. The heart and the blood. The fingers and the keys.
It is all made of Love and you get to make of it what you Will, whether it be peace or overwhelm. It all informs and leads you to this place of your infinite power and desire. The real world, your world, is so much more than you have been conditioned to imagine and accept. Feel the sacred in the profane. The consciousness of your surroundings. This ebb and flow of your emotional symphony. This moment gives birth to the notes of your heartsong. Let it be real in all its textures and tones. This is an unending and ever-beginning discovery if you just be open to all that life is wanting to offer you in each moment.
Listen, breath, BE still. The universe awaits your return and readiness to receive.
Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual teacher, men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.
Note: You can see the crop circle here: http://www.cropcircleconnector.com/2017/cleyhill/cleyhill2017a.html
“We are ascending through a collective experience of disclosure that grows from within.” I was offered THAT during meditation recently by my guides. I was in a pretty high UP place energetically in which it becomes difficult to mentally track what I am experiencing and being offered. It becomes challenging to even remember much of what I’ve experienced and, very often, I pass out/crash nap as some kind of ‘rewiring’ is going on to really let it in beyond my conscious mind. ALL of this makes it challenging to write about and share what comes through, so I’m going to ask for help from my guides to help me out here and clear through the fog.
I started this meditation/journey by focusing on and letting in the latest crop circle that appeared in England sometime during the night of July 17, 2017 to be discovered on July 18th. Of course, this date ‘pings’ for us as it offers a sense of portal or gateway…..7/17/17….THAT is a lot of seven energy. Rather than go google what that means, I felt to check in with my guides about the crop circle, the message it offers us, and the significance of the date when it was offered to us.
I felt myself swirling around in the various sacred geometric shapes offered in the crop circle and I really FELT them and let them into my heart rather than tried to mentally understand them. I had a wood cutting of the flower of life figure on my third eye with an amethyst to help with this experience and a metatron’s cube cut out on my heart chakra with a rose quartz on top of it. I like the physicality of these shapes on my body and feel them much more this way in combination with the energy of the crystals. I haven’t ‘read’ anywhere to do this, it’s just what has felt natural and good. Whatever works and doesn’t harm anyone is my sense about these things. NO real RULES in meditation or when connecting with guides and higher self guidance.
The pyramids in the crop circle felt like alchemy, change, death and rebirth…..forces of change peaking UP and coming through. They also felt like gateways that can be ‘activated’ from within and of course represent the going UPward of our consciousness as what happens during ascension. The merkaba is the spirit light body, the vehicle to multidimensional travel and such a well-known symbol of the ascension process. When I felt the one in the crop circle, it was a collective merkaba, one that is available and possible for ALL of humanity.
The collective merkaba offers the sense of our multi-dimensional essence and aspects, including Star BEing and angelic aspects/guides. The message came in strong then (fortified by the flower of life) that ascension is for ALL of humanity. Not just a select few choosing a higher timeline reality. Not just for those polarized toward love and light. It didn’t seem to mean that we NEED all of humanity in order to live New Earth in the Now as that is each of our individual choices toward love and not fear. Yet, the invitation seemed to be to remember that we are ALL ONE, so even when it feels like we are going a different way from so many souls in mainstream consciousness…..on another, higher level, we COULD all go together, we are ALL invited to come along, and we ARE all ascending if even one of us is.
The symbols that look like eights actually turned into the infinity symbol….elongated and stretched out, seeming to offer an invitation into our Infinite Love and Infinite Awareness sacred human essence. The infinity shapes (six of them) are side by side with six circles. This felt like a representation of the Infinite Circle of Life that lives in each of us and for which we are connected and sourced from. Along with the infinite possibilities available to us ALL….again, the energy was of a collective invitation to experience this sense of the Infinite inside of each of us as the Source of our existences.
And then, Metatron says, “There’s my cube!” or a modified version of it anyway and seemed proud of this and surprised. I asked him then who offered this crop circle to us and he replied, “Some friends. And friends of friends,” and then winked at me. I got the sense that the gift and message of this circle was not just from benevolent Star BEings/ETs who are waiting for us to BE more ready as a collective to begin the disclosure and connection process….yet, also, humans who are in the ‘know’ with the star BEings and working with them toward this end. I’ve heard this called by David Wilcock as The Alliance, so it could be that.
The sense of humans and star BEings ‘working together’ was a sweet one. Metatron shrugged a bit at the awe these crop circles produce as, in another way, it’s fairly ‘simple’ technology from a Star BEing perspective that creates them. Like that movie, The Gods Must Be Crazy, where the natives go crazy in awe over a coke bottle since they’ve never seen one, so we humans ‘go crazy’ when presented with something in our 3D reality that is NOT explainable by current science or the prevailing worldview of five sense reality filtering. At the core of us lives the indefinable mystery for which we are made and long to return and a deep sense of curiosity gets triggered by ‘unexplainable’ things like crop circles.
I LIKE that we can be awed though and I felt how much LOVE was in the offering of this crop circle too. The use of such obvious sacred geometry is like a bill board loudly announcing that the process of disclosure of Star Being reality is accelerating and collective ascension is continuing to be underway in the NOW. The main energies I felt were hope, Infinite Possibilities, and a deep, abiding love for humanity spiced with an acute eagerness to begin the collective collaboration process that WILL change our lives for the better and for all of the galaxies too!
I feel that this crop circle is also an invitation for each of us to meditate on it and hear, feel, see the message from it that we are meant to receive. It could be deeply personal for you in this phase of your ascension or it could be more a collective message or vision, as I received. No messages are ‘right’ or ‘wrong’. The main sense is to trust that whatever comes is what you are meant to receive from your higher self and multidimensional aspects as you feel into ascension through the collective experience as it continues to bloom and grow from within.
I live a life that is an ever-evolving mystery that is in always in a state of ebb and flow from one heartline to the next. It feels like an organic, breathing, and growing entity that is in a state of creative flux and expansion. I traverse dimensions from one hour to the next, one minute teaching children in China the English language and the next I am entering deep emotional and spiritual domains to assist someone through the valley of their inner woundings to feel a sense of home inside themselves. From there I am helping Kalayna prepare for her new job with my same company, preparing our weekly museletter which has the energy of nuclear fusion in the form of a love bomb, and then typing this reflection to share before heading out to the beach to take in sacred sun codes and merge with the vast serenity of Gaia’s healing waters.
While at times this has felt like a series of upshifts and downshifts that have left a part of me a bit discombobulated, I am beginning to transition into this new world of flow and surrender. Of needs and authenticity. Riding the waves of intuition and creativity, sometimes getting rolled over in the surf, but always learning something and growing from the experience. Life and me are beginning to merge more and more into the present and letting go of what may or may not happen. What is right or wrong. What I should or shouldn’t do. It is taking each step with an open heart and divine trust that what comes my way is what was meant for my highest good and growth. To deny or resist them is denying the love that wants to set me into greater heights of experience and awareness.
There are difficult moments and I am still learning to move with them with as much vulnerability and integrity as possible. Without them I am plateaued and that is not why I have drawn this way of life to inhabit with as much honor and leadership as possible. It is a life that is lived from one moment to the next, with still having sights on a grander picture of abundance and experience. There is no intention less than creating a community of SoulFullHearts that expand the globe and the galaxy. This is no joke. We left Canada and the US to let go of what was conditioned. One day we will leave Earth too, to explore new horizons that parts of us can only let in as imagination.
But there is work to do. Good, heartful, soul expanding work. It is is remarkable life and it is extraordinary. It has its growth moments but they are all meant to lead us the next and the next, in Love, to Love, for Love, and with Love.
If you are curious about what the SoulFullHeart Way of Life may offer you in your journey toward MORE, you can join us in our next group call this Saturday at 11:11 CST, hosted by Jelelle and Raphael Awen and contributed to by Kalayna Colibri and myself. https://www.facebook.com/events/271320303342295
Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual teacher, men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.
“Come follow me, and you will find your mess” – a biblical quote reframe, as offered to me by Yeshua
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There’s a light up ahead, held by someone who has done much work. Someone who beams a beacon of hope and love and possibility. Their energy invites you in and also invites you to follow them. They don’t energize being ‘better’ or ‘holier’ than you, they only seem to energize that they are somehow ‘ahead’ and want to vulnerably lead you into more possibilities, healing and growth for yourself.
Maybe you choose to follow because the warmth of the heart cord between you is incredible and familiar and not like anything you’ve ever felt before in this life. You want to be near this person, relate closely with them, and yet you can’t quite relate to them yet. They feel ‘close’ to you in a sweet sense, yet they almost feel like something that isn’t from this world. How could that be? They certainly seem human enough. You conclude that somehow they ARE human, just living in a different sort of dimension than you’re used to. Wow. THAT’S interesting because the dimension you’ve been living in feels old, stale, essentially loveless to you more and more these days as you continue to awaken to the universe within and outside of you.
As you continue to follow this person up ahead, you feel the infusions of light and love that they offer. You feel too, the realness they hold about their personal reality – how they or parts of them feel or are reacting in given moments. You can feel them holding this reality as sacred, though sometimes the energy feels intense to parts of you that you haven’t fully felt yet. What they offer to themselves and to you seems like ‘love’, but it’s a different love than you’ve experienced, as most of the time those around you refuse to be ‘real’ or current with what they’re feeling or experiencing. Or, on the other hand, they dump energy and emotion on you and in the space they hold with you, feeling like a victim and playing a victim’s role, effectively and skillfully drawing up a case that backs up their claim to perpetual victimhood. You’ve never had this contrast be illuminated for you before and it stirs something inside of you. Parts of you may start to feel victimized to this new frequency of love that is so illuminating, as it shows you too the ways in which you have been and held this same energy of co-dependently being in relationship with others and not deeply maturing emotionally, though you may ‘seem’ mature to most others in your life. You are experiencing how this love is holding up a mirror for you, and wow, there’s actually quite a bit of shadow there to feel!
This being you chose to follow encourages you to keep feeling it all. WHAT?! I have to FEEL it all?! You begin to feel a part of you is getting overwhelmed by the volume of what there is to feel, and you feel a bit surprised by what is still there that you thought you had healed by now. You feel the weight and the mess of it all… the entanglements within your relationships, past and present, the knots living inside of your heart and soul, the shadow pieces and parts of you popping up now to be witnessed, felt, held, healed. It’s a lot. Sometimes it feels like ‘too much’… and your new leader invites you to just ‘hold on tight!’ while the winds whip by and through you, inviting you to step into them despite the swirling chaos inside of you.
This is what it means to be on a path where you find that ‘mess’ within. That ‘mess’ that you learn to love as you trust that it’s leading you somewhere NEW. Amidst the mess, you get to decide whether or not you want to continue walking into it. You get to decide in every single moment, what you want next. And you get to decide whether or not you really trust this process and are ready for it.
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In SoulFullHeart, we don’t hold a grandiose or lofty picture of who we are as spiritual and emotional teachers, leaders and facilitators. The work we’ve done and continue to do is challengings and sometimes downright hard to be in, though the payoff is incredible, as the growth and consciousness expansion is exponential. If anything we are here to guide you if you can lean into what we offer and embody.
Choosing to be around us in any way or form offers some sort of challenge to your being, just because of this way of life we embody. Choosing to be with us here in community, well, that pushes up even more… yet your readiness is something you get to gauge in every moment, even as ‘mess’ comes up from within and seems to be playing out outside of you too.
Following any sort of spiritual and/or emotional healing path should push up quite a bit inside of you. Even if you are not drawn to SoulFullHeart, whatever path you may choose will very likely give you a lot to feel and heal. There is no way, in my experience, to avoid or fully transcend what we signed up to heal in this life. Embracing our messes, no matter where we are in our path or what teacher(s) or leader(s) we may choose to follow or learn from, gives us this gift of finding our way to deeper and deeper decisions about the playout of our lives and how and who we most want to be.
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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visitsoulfullheartwayoflife.comfor more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.
There is a moment in our lives when it all just hits the fan. The way we used to interface with the world no longer has any juice left. The cracks in the facade start to weather, and you just can’t roll with things the way you used to. You can’t be false. Then the only thing you can really do is shut down, go crazy, or start being honest with yourself. This is where life gets real and that can be difficult to this part of you that has protected you and tried to find love the only way it knew how. But it is tired and it is looking for You to come into the picture and help put it all in “order”.
When it is time to let go and get real, it can be a very uneasy process. There are so many tricky places and conditioned responses that can send us in a wild goose chase for our golden egg of authenticity. There are painful obstacles and trip-wire sabotage. Yet there are also glorious movements that bring the walls down and bring in the light of real love from the core of what we truly are. These times of deep emotional upheavals are like love magma that is looking to surface and coat the pain of what was unfelt. With a deep spirituality, you can be held during these times by something greater than the pain.
It is going into our emotional wounding that actually gives the spiritual body its depth and meaning. It is not at all separate, but intrinsically connected to our emotional body. We can live very content emotional and spiritual lives on the surface, but when we consciously choose to enter into something that goes to the core of our BEing we find that we have only just begun to become aware of what we really are and can be. But as with any real growth comes the price of deep feeling and the transaction of real love.
I can feel the next layers of what eventually needs healing in my emotional body that only comes when divine timing and situation has coalesced to bring that to my awareness. It can generally take you by surprise and create reactions that are just so perfect for where we need to go to grow. I have times feeling a part that doesn’t want to “go there” only to assure it that what lies on the other side is more goodness and more love.
This process of emotional and spiritual maturation can be very challenging and difficult to navigate on ones own. It is being held and guided by others, in community, that serve this very rewarding pathway. You may find yourself in times of deep personal process that needs a bigger You to show up to, but know that is all part of what is being given to you as a gift for further deepening of emotional and spiritual consciousness. Knowing there is Love on the other side is what keeps you going and growing.
To feel more about what this the burgeoning new way of life may have to offer you, I invite you to attend our next SoulFullHeart group call this Saturday at 11:11 AM CST. We will be offering teachings about bridging to your emotional body and your spirituality and a guided meditation to connect with your emotional body (plus individual sharings): https://www.facebook.com/events/271320303342295
Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual teacher, men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.
Divine Self Embodiment Blog (Formerly SoulFullHeart) 