Category: SoulFullHeart

Feeling What We Really Want In Our Social Worlds As We Awaken

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

 

by Kalayna Colibri

our social worlds

On a Saturday night, I gaze among the busy social streets and walkways, humming with activity and energy and alcohol and friendship… sometimes coupled with drama and pain and backed-up emotional outbursts. During these party times, you can feel the buzz in the air that will soon be in every body, not just from substances taken in, but from the high of socializing, being among peers, perhaps finding love, sex or making new friends. There are grounds here that are healthy to explore and some that aren’t really in a sense, and yet it’s all sacred and it’s all ultimately a path to self-discovery and remembrance, even if this isn’t made conscious in the moments these selves, these individuals, these human BEings are in.

While young, being spiritual can find its place in you if this is what you’ve signed up for… exploring consciousness can sometimes happen with your peers, while at other times it won’t or just can’t. For a phase this journey with them can only go so deep and that’s fine with you for a while, but beyond that phase when that was enough, it’s not quite enough anymore. This is when values shift along with ideas of life and how to live it consciously and more fully. This is where certain areas of focus, ways to find pleasure, and paths to feeling a togetherness with others all rumble beneath your feet and in front of your eyes. This is where your life begins to turn itself upside down in countless ways as you begin to feel the need to push away, sometimes dramatically, sometimes subtly, but always in a way that reminds you, you are your own person and you have your own sense of what energies you need and want to be around as your self love heals and deepens.

There can be a fear arising then, for some… that no one will ever really “get” them or may judge them for walking away from the relationship. Parts of them form and begin to strategize to either stay alone out of fear of having and then losing intimacy at any level, or choose to merge in with whatever group of people they are around or whatever situation they are in, becoming one with all around them and not much of an individual in most ways. There is tension and yet also relief as you find your ways to take care of and love YOU as your number one priority. There is sometimes also flatness, as managing these ups and downs (that are hormonal, sure, but also a genuine awakening to soul and heart pain) can be a challenging crucible to hold and handle and be with. So much depends on who you choose to be around and talk to and lean into for support. This shopping around, seeking, searching experience is one that can be incredibly mind and heart-opening, fascinating, and ever-arising too, as resonance moves in and out in very necessary growth phases. This again changes the social circle you choose to be part of and certainly affects the one you currently have as you continue to awaken to the love you are and the love you want to experience between yourself and others. There are so many different dynamics that are possible here and that play out in different ways, with many possible outcomes… yet the risk is always the same – if I don’t stay the same and they do, I will be friendless again or even for the first time…

The strong soul-pull to discover and remember our purposes is something that is happening more and more with people of all ages and soul groups, especially right now with ascension processes accelerating for everyone, yet when it comes to indigo, crystal and rainbow souls, for example, these social awakenings can come very early in our lives as we came in with a powerful, mission-based focus that is natural for us to feel, yet not so natural to “know” exactly what to do with. It can be very challenging to finds ways to fit in with others in our peer group, not because we are victims to this (though parts of us understandably feel this way sometimes) but because we chose for this to be the case… after all, if we actually DID feel as if we totally, fully, completely “belonged”, where would our sense of mission and awakening to our soul gifts have room to happen, take hold and start manifesting in our lives? To not suffer around this, means going IN and feeling ourselves with reflections from teachers and mentors who have also been there and can help us learn to navigate it, often much better than our birth parents ever could – not necessarily because they didn’t want to try, but because in some ways they weren’t actually meant to be the ones to lead you onward and into this.

Throughout the majority of my life to date, having and keeping a thriving a social world was very challenging. This is partly because I was always very much IN my emotional states and didn’t have templating for how to actually BE with them and hold them… no adult around me could help with this and my peers had a hard time relating to me most of the time, plus it eventually became a tool for parts of me to actually push and keep others away. Then there was spirituality and the deepening of THAT for me… and now I am on a very powerful and ever-expanding path that spans both my emotional AND spiritual inner realities and THAT is rare, though it seems that more and more people, as they awaken, are realizing how connected these two realities are and that they need healing in both in order to fully embrace and live into ascension. In my experience and observation both, I can see and feel how this ground of being naturally very emotional and also spiritual has been and continues to be a tough crucible for many of us… awakening does come at a cost, yet is intended to invite us out of suffering while holding the parts of us who cling to suffering as a way to be in life. One of these ways in which we seem to choose to continue suffering, is by surrounding ourselves with relationships that do not have a deeply resonant ground. Our social worlds collapse and expand as we continue to grow… but not without love leading the way and guiding us to our next places inward that then draw our next circumstances outward.

Not having a full social world to ground you can be hard for some souls, yet for others it won’t be and that poses its own challenges. Choosing the path of the lone wolf is also hard and even though parts of you may be working to bury the loneliness somehow, it is still there. These parts can be held, worked with and healed deeply, allowing us to feel how we really, genuinely feel, what it is we most deeply want and who we actually want to be around and spend time with. Our loneliness is sacred and alchemical… it is creative. It is a space where we can feel our deepest aches and desires for mateship, for companionship, for a community of people that continually arise for us as we arise for them. Being afraid of feeling our loneliness is expected and normal, but holding these parts of us who feel this way teaches us so much about ourselves and offers us much healing when it is held in our hearts FOR us and WITH love and Divine guidance and company too… we are never really alone, though this can be hard to feel and let in. Yet sometimes alone-ness can be a grace, a place to genuinely feel what we need to feel, and an oven to bake our arising desires in.

Perhaps you are part of a social world right now that may be running out of ground for you, as your awakenings are helping you feel pictures and energies of the sort of love you want to feel from you to you and flowing from you to others and vice versa… in the end, the choice is yours as to what steps to take next, and there is no wrong answer or true misstep along the way. Even our biggest messes seem to offer us many gems of learning, growth and self-discovery. Letting go can be painful and hard, yet in the end, true service to a relationship of any kind starts with feeling what you genuinely want and need, while holding all relationships with an open hand and heart. This becomes a grace to you and your parts, and them and theirs too, as everyone is then free to go along their own path, however they see and feel it unfolding for them.

I would love to serve you and help you navigate this terrain that can be so challenging and yet hopeful too. You are meant to become more of your essence, your light, your soul purpose and mission. You are meant to lead and BE a big part of ascension and we all need each other more than perhaps we ever have before!

You can visit http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions for more information on session space.

Sending you lots of love and support… ❤

Kalayna

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge and healer, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Sacred Femininity Teachings And Guided Meditation To Connect With Divine Feminine Guides And Your Inner Protector

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

By Jelelle Awen

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The inner feminine took her space today, held HER space with the Divine Feminine coming in to provide supporting frequencies and NEW templating of what it means to be a woman. It is being open to feeling the templating we received from our birth mothers and what IS us and what is NOT. It is being open to feeling the protector aspect of us who is guarding the inner feminine, who doesn’t feel we are qualified to connect with her INSIDE us…..it is amazing in some ways how clear this energy is when we are given a bridge to it as happened today in the women’s call.

A satisfaction, a sense of serving love WITH women, together going where the soul needs and where the heart wants in the moment…guides holding the space and higher selves too. THIS group call today with women is still going into me as a nourishing experience of teaching, sharing, guiding and witnessing the beauty and gift of parts work open new possibilities for women as it has done for me for so many years. It makes me feel like a proud mama, SoulFullHeart mama even as I am NOT really the force that moves it but rather IT moves me as one way love offers itself to serve.

Thank you to the women who joined Kalayna Colibri and I, courageous souls on a journey of healing, awakening, ascending, growing……NOT an easy path, one with more ash in the air often then confetti, more sense of being your only fan at times rather than much approval or support from others, and continual venture into the unknown over and over sometimes stumbling in the dark and sometimes following a guiding inner light to reveal, eventually, something REAL.

These groups are a TASTE of what we offer through SoulFullHeart, a taste of something that if you are resonant and it is meant for you then you are urged and moved to want MORE and limitless possibilities of timelines unfold from there. Space holding sessions one-on-one, immersion visits to BE with us here in Puerto Vallarta, group process sessions (these will be offered when we have enough souls in regularly occurring session space with us), becoming a SoulFullHeart facilitator someday, coming to live near us here in community, having us come VISIT you where you are…..oh, see, so many possibilities! THESE I am very open to and eager for!

And HERE is the recording of the women’s group call. This recording is of the teachings that I did in the beginning of the call (with input from Kalayna Colibri) about the sacred feminine. Then, there is about a 40 minute guided meditation offered by me…..a journey to your inner castle, representing your essence and your inner femininity, and connects you with your inner protector. Your inner protector offers you a ‘way’ to your inner feminine yet needs to be negotiated with FIRST! Four Divine Feminine guides accompany you as you are introduced to the frequencies of a NEW template that they offer you around femininity: Mother Mary, Magdalene, Kuan Yin, and Dark Mother. I believe this could be beneficial for women AND men too….

The personal sharings and some facilitation by me that followed the meditation have been edited out for privacy….the real sense of what it IS to be on a SoulFullHeart call and what it FEELS like to be in a sessions space is in those, so you get even more goodness from being live, there, joining YOUR energy with ours!

 

Our next women’s call is May 20th, which you can read about here if you would like to join us in the next arising yin space:https://www.facebook.com/events/1083484598423538/

Our next group call open to both women and men and facilitated by me andRaphael Awen is April 29th:https://www.facebook.com/events/1575650452475825/

You can listen to previous group call recordings here:soulfullheartwayoflife.com/groupcalls

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and teacher of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Embodying Sacred Feminine Frequencies

Published on by Jelelle Awen1 Comment

By Jelelle Awen

 

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Painting by Robin Chance

 

The sacred feminine, the divine feminine embodied, the woman living more and more from the place of fifth dimensional (and higher) consciousness….She can be a mystery, an arising question to live into more than about clear definitions or set answers. There is a sense that her energy invites and draws others as she serves love WITH in all areas of her life and in most moments. She lives from a sense of personal integrity and authenticity, having embraced her inner shadow with love and courage, and inspires others to BE the same. She leads with vulnerability, her strength coming from bringing what is real in her heart and soul. She invites others into a possible resonant ground that reflects a mutual truth possibility rather than contending or trying to prove that she is right. She is able to take action on what is necessary to be done in order to serve love as an expression of her soul purpose and connection to Divine Source.

The sense of what it IS to be an ascending and awakening human in female form seems to be a deepening, spiraling, non-linear process. There are curves and turns, offering the next layer of discovery or another ‘round’ of experiencing a pattern or loop repeating itself and offering another piece of our puzzle. As we awaken, and especially in the 4D transition phase, we may become less polarized in our gender expression as we burn away and let go of what is not who we really ARE in feminine expression but rather what we have been conditioned to be. We are invited to feel what is NOT actually authentic femininity, what seems to come instead from a wounded masculine expression or place of BEing or aspect inside of us.

Holding space for women and my own process around embodying my sacred femininity, healing the emotional body, awakening the soul, integrating karmic aspects from other lifetimes has offered me a higher perspective on the patterns and themes that often play out in this process. The word ‘sacred’ is important as a key marker of movement in this process is from being SCARED of the inner feminine to being SACRED with it….. holding it with an increasing sense of reverence and curiosity.

A key differentiation place in this process is to become conscious about the template we received from our birth mothers, other significant female caregivers, and birth sister(s) relationships. It can be very illuminating to ask the questions: What was the templating I received from my mother around what it means to be a woman? What templating did I receive from other female caregivers and from my sister(s) around what it means to be a woman? How does the energy and messages of this templating impact me now in all areas of my life? How does this energy express in my relationships?

Connecting with your ‘inner birth mother’ can lead to great healing and separation. A simple way to do this is to write a letter (and outloud during meditation too if you want) to your inner mother telling her how you experience her energy in her life and invite her to write back. You then begin a written dialogue together with you asking her questions about herself and discovering more about this energy that lives inside of you as you ‘took it in’ like a sponge your whole life. As you connect with your inner mother, you will begin to ‘defuse’ or separate from this energy, allowing for more objectivity about it and with more arising of your authentic essence. It may not be possible for you to embody your authentic or genuine frequency of femininity while in relationship with your mother and a phase of taking space from the relationship may be necessary to experience more clarity, perspective, and growth.

Another key aspect to the sacred feminine embodiment process can be connecting with wounded masculine energies that you have taken in and embodied. This can especially present itself in an inner protector aspect, a usually masculine feeling and looking energy that expresses as a guardedness and uses weapons of protection such as energetic shields, swords to jab and pierce (internally and toward others), etc. Negotiation with the inner protector allows for more authentic gender expression of femininity as this aspect often guards the inner feminine and conscious negotiation with it can lead to deeper embodiment and access.

Connecting with energies of the Divine Feminine in different frequencies as Ethereal guides provides a new templating to replace the ones you are letting go of. I have mainly experienced connection with Divine Feminine guides showing up in the energies and forms of Mother Mary, Magdalene, Kuan Yin, and Kali/Dark Mother. Experiencing these guides (and however She shows up for you) during meditation allows for an infusion of multidimensional yin frequencies of comfort, nurturing, creative alchemy, sisterhood, stillness, healthy sexuality, passion, desire, and much more. These frequencies serve as healing balm to the places inside that experienced the wounded feminine and still suffer around it.

Another aspect of embodying the inner feminine is connecting with and healing karmic and archetypal wounded feminine soul themes such as non-vulnerable priestess, pious nun, matriarch/queen, warrior, medicine woman, witch, and more. Karmic playouts can express in persecution wounding experiences (both as the persecuted and the persecutor) that greatly suppress or impact your ability to express your soul gifts as a woman teacher, way-shower, and healer, for example. Or another examples is feeling how sisterhood wounding or traumatic experiences from other lifetimes may influence your relationships with women now. The push away from or the surrender to patriarchy is a big one for most of us with ways that it energizes and plays out in the now and impacts our gender expression.

Embodying the sacred feminine is holding space for the emotional reactions and previously undigested emotional frequencies that come up from the emotional body during the awakening and ascending process. It is also making space for and surrendering to the ‘rumble’ of death and rebirth of the feminine that wants to move through your life and clear out what no longer serves you or serves love. Rebirth can only happen with death or with letting go. Letting go of frequencies that don’t match you anymore in all areas of your life, making changes at a rate and pace that is self loving WITH negotiation with parts of you if possible allows for the blooming of your inner feminine from a small seed to full, ever arising expression of your BEing in female form.

This is the ground that I cover with women in SoulFullHeart Group Calls (there is one on June 17th and July 15th) and through SoulFullHeart facilitation sessions (and for women around 30 with Kalayna Colibri): soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and teacher of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

She Is Blooming: Poem For The Inner Feminine

Published on by Jelelle Awen1 Comment

By Jelelle Awen

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She is blooming, fertilized by a rich inner world of self discovery

She is inviting, inspired by the Divine to be a beacon of light for herself and others

She is discerning, guided to hold boundaries with love and take space when needed

She is beautifying, attuned to the exquisite possibilities around her

She is serving, called by love to share her heart and soul gifts with others

She is holding, created from a container space inside to bake on what needs to be felt

She is expanding, integrated with her multidimensional, cosmic self and star seed origins

She is arising, drawn to embody her authentic and vulnerable expression

She is BEing, energized beyond busy mind to experience life from stillness

She is the inner feminine (for both women and men)….feeling her with open heart, open mind, open soul invites her forward to play, to dance, and to LOVE….more and more, to BEcome

~

This is a NEW video with Kalayna Colibri and I discussing the sacred feminine, healing the inner feminine and the wounded masculine INside, separating from feminine birth family templating, connecting with the protector part, healing the archetypal sisterhood frequencies, working with Divine feminine energies/guides and MUCH more. Most of this I have not heard offered anywhere else quite in THIS way, which comes through our personally embodied processes for many years that we share about too.

This video gives you a good sense of what our group call for women will be like on saturday April 15th at 11:11am, which will also include a guided meditation with me to connect with your inner feminine, identify your protector who ‘guards’ your inner feminine (which allows WAY more access), and some Divine Feminine guide frequency connection too with Mother Mary (and maybe others). This call will also offer an opportunity to connect with other resonant women with regular calls scheduled monthly in the future (the next one is scheduled for May 20th.)

For more information about the call on April 15th, go here:https://www.facebook.com/events/210818762733437/ or to soulfullheartwayoflife.com/groupcalls. To offer a donation (no minimum amount) to come to the call, go here:soulfullheartwayoflife.com/donations

For more info about sessions with me for women and with Kalayna (for women around 30 years old): soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

To watch an intro video with Kalayna and I talking more about the sacred feminine: https://youtu.be/gkjwI_9BAi8

 

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and teacher of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

No More Waiting To Live

Published on by Gabriel HeartmanLeave a comment

51

When I awoke today, suddenly nothing happened

But in my dreams, I slew the dragon

And down this beaten path, and up this cobbled lane

I’m walking in my old footsteps, once again

And you say, just be here now

Forget about the past, your mask is wearing thin

Let me throw one more dice

I know that I can win

I’m waiting for my real life to begin

from Waiting For My Real Life To Begin by Colin Hay

 

These words found there way to me through an interesting route that is so feminine in its nature.  Seemingly random thoughts and exchanges that landed a song into my dock.  I was feeling into what I wanted to write about today and this song hit a chord and I felt to play it and see what tune it sings.  

For those that are in more 4D consciousness, whether just entered or are seasoned veterans (interesting choice of words), there can be this sense that something hasn´t quite shifted on the outside to reflect the growing awareness of what feels true on the inside.  There can be this feeling of looking toward the horizon waiting for something to happen.  In the song, he also uses the words `I have a plan` and `times are just lean`.  There is an externalization, a projection onto life, that it is not on our side or we need to take control in someway to create a desired outcome that hasn`t arrived yet.  That the passion and desire inside are conditional to some set of external circumstances that have to occur in order to be set free.  

I remember this well in my own journey, feeling stuck in a `good career`. Trying to seek many different ways to make it all okay even as I was still `walking down the same ol` cobblestone streets`.  What was needing to happen was what the song suggested and that was to be in the moment and go into your heart. Feel what was really trying to be felt and expressed.  Nothing on the outside could make that any better.  It was I that had to make the journey in and listen to my soul.

The waiting was just a suffering.  A denial to really feel what was evidently true but a part of me was afraid to admit.  A more wounded masculine need to control something in order to resist what was true.  By going more still and surrendering to the feelings, I could allow these feelings to arise and be held in space created by a more solid me and the much needed support of another to hold that truth until I could do it on my own more regularly.  Feeling the fears and resistances to claiming my own power from with.  True empowerment.  Not control.  

Being in a more Yin space helps to feel how parts of us are so afraid of actually letting go of a conditioning or a relationship that is keeping us stuck and in state of suffering.  There many that have done that for themselves and there are those, like myself, who needed support. It is not a sign of weakness but of strength.  Leaning IN order to raise UP.  Support and guidance comes in all forms.  The key is to seek it so that you may help heal it.  I can feel how this can be more difficult for men than for woman but that may be shifting as more men continue to find the value of going in and feeling all there is to feel to stop the waiting and start the living.  
That is what I wanted.  Tired of the mask.  Tired of pretending. Tired of the waiting.  Because there is no time than NOW.  But I hold so much gratitude for that suffering because it brought me to a more authentic place of BEing and living.  It made the alleged comfortable very uncomfortable, so that there were only two choices…and then really only one.  Let go and Go IN.

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  You can learn more about him at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

Sacred Femininity Video With Jelelle Awen And Kalayna Colibri

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

By Jelelle Awen

I AM excited to be sharing a NEW video with me and Kalayna Colibri discussing the sacred feminine, healing the inner feminine and the wounded masculine INside, separating from feminine birth family templating, connecting with the protector part, healing the archetypal sisterhood frequencies, working with Divine feminine energies/guides and MUCH more. Most of this I have not heard offered anywhere else or quite in THIS way, which comes through our personally embodied processes for many years that we share about too.

This video gives you a good sense of what our group call for women will be like on saturday April 15th at 11:11am, which will also include a guided meditation with me to connect with your inner feminine, identify your protector who ‘guards’ your inner feminine (which allows WAY more access), and some Divine Feminine guide frequency connection too with Mother Mary (and maybe others). This call will also offer an opportunity to connect with other resonant women with regular calls scheduled monthly in the future (the next one is scheduled for May 20th.)

For more information about the call on April 15th, go here:https://www.facebook.com/events/210818762733437/.

To offer a donation (no minimum amount) to come to the call, go here:soulfullheartwayoflife.com/donations

For more info about sessions with me for women and with Kalayna (for women around and under 30 years old): soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

To watch an intro video with Kalayna and I talking more about the sacred feminine: https://youtu.be/gkjwI_9BAi8

Jelelle Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.com

Digesting Post Traumatic Reactions Stored In The Emotional Body

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment
By Jelelle Awen
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Yesterday, while Raphael and I were out sitting at a cafe, I thought I saw a woman from my past. In the immediate sense that this MIGHT be her, I felt a knot of anxiety and tension in my third chakra or solar plexus area flare up. After confirming with Raphael that it wasn’t this woman, who I will call “Jane”, I felt the tension move out my field replaced by a sense of calm and love.
 
In digesting my response to seeing who I thought was Jane, I gave my solar plexus some loving energy as I felt into what the reaction had been. Jane was once a very close friend of mine, true soul family and sister. Almost ten years ago, we were both part of a spiritual and emotional healing group for close to five years together. The same group for which Raphael and I met and eventually left together. I left the group in a highly intense way, after receiving a choice from Daniel – the leader of the group and a man who was like my surrogate father – to either break up with Raphael for a year or leave the group as we were deemed too codependent to be together in a healthy way. This choice was given to me after only three weeks of dating and years of me being in the group within the inner circle and serving as a facilitator of the work for a few years too.
 
It was a very difficult decision on one end yet, also, my soul was guiding me that it was time to leave this setting which had brought so much love and healing to my life but for which much of it I had outgrown. I heard a strong “No more” in my head which I feel now was my higher self and my guides. I said ‘no’ to the frequencies of control, power OVER those in the group, the gossiping and competition amongst those in the facilitator circle. I said ‘yes’ to my own sovereignty and my choice to explore relationship with Raphael, a man who felt like the deepest mate of heart, soul, and body that I had been desiring for many years. When I left the group, none of the people who I felt to be soul family would or could talk with me any longer.
 
Jane and I were living together at the time of this dissolution with the group and it was very awkward. We tried to have a friendship ‘outside’ of the group, but she was still very much involved and wouldn’t listen to my growing clarities about the shadow frequencies within it. The separation with her and her disapproval of me was so challenging for me to digest when we had experienced so much love together. Eventually, we went our separate ways, with love, and with her choice to continue in the group. We haven’t spoken in over nine years even as the group fell apart two years ago with Daniel finally being called out for his behaviors by all those in the group.
 
I am sharing this story, I believe, because it was interesting to feel how even though consciously I have reconciled this experience, my emotional and energy body still held trauma from it. I connected with this energy in my solar plexus last night (and the nasal congestion that came up too) and also cut any karmic bind cords with Jane and yet sent her love too in case it was the Universe telling me that she was thinking of me. In my experience serving others, this is how our emotional and energy bodies work…they store undigested pain in this way, as pockets that release when they are triggered to release (what Carl Jung called ‘being constellated’). We can trigger them to release through consciously connecting with the part of us that holds this energy as we offer and hold space for in SouLFullHeart.
 
Ultimately, I feel gratitude for my experience in this group and my experience with Jane especially as I trust that our souls signed up for it and it brought me so many gifts of realization around heart-based leadership that invites others into and respects their sovereignty, which is the place I come from related to SoulFullHeart. This group also introduced me to the emotional body, parts work, and the importance of healing at this deep emotional level. Because of the dark night I experienced in leaving the group and ‘losing’ all of my soul family connections that I had at the time, I appreciate the connections that I have with others now in a much deeper way. And, my bond with Raphael was instantly solidified and strengthened by our moving through the trauma of leaving together and we really had no ‘choice’ but to be completely vulnerable with other. This experience also helped me work and heal karmic patterns around rejection, being dominated, dominating others (I connected with my inner Daniel part at some point), shadow side of spirituality, authority, etc.
 
If you find yourself in or are digesting having been in a relationship with some of these frequencies (and this can happen in romantic and family relationships too, usually what is called the empath and narcissist relationship), it takes time to heal and recover from them for sure and much inner strength and soul resolve to complete them. In fact, ‘time’ doesn’t really exist to these places of trauma as it is stored in the emotional body which doesn’t relate to time. The feeling and connecting with these places through negotiation with the protector part that is protecting them can lead to much movement, growth, and healing with lots of self love and care. Held in a container of love, the lessons are integrated and the tensions are moved with much transformation and deeper embodiment of the higher self.
 
We can offer support to those of you going through this kind of situation in personal relationship or in recovery from a group through SoulFullHeart space holding sessions. More about that here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions
Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and teacher of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

What IS Ascension?

Published on by Jelelle Awen1 Comment

By Jelelle Awen

ascension

Ascension invites the stretching upward, the blooming and growing, the awakening and expanding. It is the remembering of what has been forgotten. It is the reclaiming of what has been disowned. It is the loving of what has been judged, both inside and toward others. It is the wanting of MORE from your soul and higher self, shifting away from the desire center of your 3D self who wants comfort and safety and to keep life small and to fit in with others. It is the letting go and mourning and releasing what no longer serves love and the expression of your higher self. It is holding space for all of the reactions that come up in the emotional body in response to this process of letting go.

Ascension invites the rising UP of your consciousness, your awareness, your perception of reality as it shifts from inside you. It is the “Ds” of both dimensions and density with the levels of third to fourth to fifth (and beyond) offering shifts and expansions in your experience of your inner world. Each dimensional shift in consciousness offers a new level of claim. It invites in change and transformation at both the practical and the transcendent levels, as what shifts inside starts to shift what you experience on the outside.

Ascension is an invitation from the Universe and Divine Source to claim and embody what is your birthright as a sacred human expression in bodily form. It is to feel this birthright without expectation or entitlement, yet to understand that it is a GIFT from Divine Source offered to be experienced WITH you. It is the crystallizing of the physical body to vibrate higher and higher to become more and more your merkaba, your vehicle of light and multidimensional travel. Holding space for this transition of the physical body is to trust the symptoms that move through are for the reason of this embodiment of your merkaba.

Ascension invites you to feel what your heart most wants and cries for. What your MORE is that is flushed up and out through desires that come in through your soul. This invitation can press on you, yes, but it never forces. The press comes from your awakening soul and your healing heart. The press comes from your increasing desires for MORE….more intimacy, more connection, more joy, more bliss, more goodness, more service, more empowerment, more inner explorations, more LOVE.

Ascension invites you to feel how the MORE-ness arising inside you can be tamped down and dampened by aspects of you that are afraid for you to desire, want you to remain safe, try to keep you comfortable. These aspects of you, led by your most loyal protector, are in vigilance to keep the MORE at bay in whatever ways and means they can. They are like dams trying to block the flood of love that wants to surge through your life. These aspects of you can release their efforts at blocking through connection with the arising soul infused and authentic YOU.

Ascension is the more and more visceral and lived in expression of New Earth AS your reality in the NOW, not as a future goal, but as a true processing ground of your life. It is baking from within this New and Golden Earth reality, journeying within and visiting this New Earth, and BECOMING this New Earth. So then you ARE this New Earth, inviting others to join you here in the now to experience it with you. It is drawing others to collaborate in the creation of this New Earth in the now as you form a community together.

Ascension invites your service of love with others, in mutual respect and reverence with others. It is the expression of your soul gifts, energizing from and cultivated during other lifetimes. It is the knowledge of your soul coming through to serve and to guide and to share with others. It is moving beyond fear and into the claim WITH humility of what your soul knows and remembers of service with others. It is stepping out of the previous comfortable zones into frequencies of possible resistance and rejection to serve as a beacon of possibility and way showing for those who want it.

Ascension invites your soul to awaken through the warmth of the light of love that increasingly shines as you feel what is YOU in your soul essence expression and what is NOT. It waters the seed of your sacred humanity, watering and fertilizing the bud of your sacred human with love. This bud blooms and grows inside through a process that is just been spring loaded to happen. It wants to expand into your whole BEing with the reunion to Divine Source frequencies so that you experience more and more New Earth AS your reality and yourself as a SACRED human embodying and experiencing life here in the now.

Ascension invites all this and MORE as it cannot really be defined in another way……as it IS beyond the mind where pure experience and essence live and are born in every moment, moment by moment, as the arising expression of love returning to love.

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and teacher of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Mourning Dawns: The Gift Of Letting Go

Published on by Gabriel HeartmanLeave a comment

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by Gabriel Heartman

You have been made Aware.  You SEE and FEEL how life is so much more than what you have been conditioned to see and protected to feel.  You cannot be made unaware.  You can choose to ignore, but it is always there.  You may not have anyone to talk to about it, or, as much as they want to, they just can’t understand.  You continue to learn more, to understand more, to feel more.  The Light presses upon what is no longer serving this new, yet stillborn, YOU.  It can be okay at times.  Just letting it unfold in its due course.  Other times it can be painful as hell.  For some it can be existential and down right scary.  What is it that can help this uncertainty?  

Going into the geography of your heart may find you are at the end of a line….a timeline.  An old way of being able to pull it all together to get through each day.  There may be a moment when you finally realize the two worlds…just…don’t…jive.  These could be relationships to people, things, behaviors, and thought patterns.  Whatever it is that is not aligning with your Highest Desire and Inner Knowing.  There is a rub between what you feel needs to be done to continue growing and how a part of you feels about that.

This can be a difficult process and the heart of what it means to live in 4D consciousness.  There is a bitter-sweet feeling about it.  There are bridges to burn, ropes to let go of, and chords to cut.  In SoulFullHeart this is held as a sacred and negotiated process in compassionate concert with a part of you being held in heart space by this arising New You and the open heart of another who has been down that road.  There are ebbs and flows.  Baby steps and great leaps.  All in the timing set by you, your Higher Self, and the parts of you so invested.  The more emotional energy invested the more negotiation needed.  

When the time eventually arises that a choice needs to be made for your greatest good, the space both before and after is big.  It is a time to take stock of all that the relationship has meant to you, whether it be a romantic partner, a family member, a friend, a suffering loop, a drug, a food, or anything else under the sun that holds this energy.  It is a time to feel what was learned, and what will be lost.  This is the Mourning Time.  This time has been held with much grace and honor across cultures.  It is a phase in which you fully enter the pain, remorse, or any other feeling that comes up in order to fully exit.  It is not a one day deal in many cases.  The mourning is a process just like the one getting to it.  But the more the mourning is inhabited, not with suffering, the more the relationship can be honored and made sacred.  

This is a time of reflection, feeling, music, writing, sleeping, crying, laughing, remembering, and a plethora of other actions that arise to honor the space.  All of it is important and beautiful.  The amount of reverence given to this period the more reverence is given to what is to come.  The rain washes away the smoke and soot of the fire to reveal the dawn of a new day. The air is fresher and the possibilities are endless.  That is the gift on the other side.  But it is one of great price to these parts of us who have held on for so long and for good reason.  These continue to happen throughout the journey in our ascension, and the more we go into them the less they will occur as we keep the spiral going IN and UP.  

I honor and admire all of us that have been through this, are going through it, and are approaching it.  This time can be the most memorable of all as markers into your New You.  It is so incredible to be able to go through it with others that have been there and feel the true courage it took to make these challenging choices.  I hope to be a witness to them in any way possible.  It is the magic of death and rebirth that fuels the propellers of Life.

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  You can learn more about him at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

 

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Practical Ascension And Parts Work: HOW To Make Changes In Your Life That Reflect Your Soul

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

By Jelelle Awen

partswork

Practical ascension….this has been floating around in my head for awhile. What IS practical ascension? I was a small business/life coach for five years and we focused with clients on the ‘what’ AND the ‘how’. The ‘what’ was the greater context and vision for their lives and business and the ‘how’ was how to get there. I’ve been asked a few times lately during SoulFullHeart sessions about the ‘how’ of making changes in life that reflect the soul’s awakening desires and pictures about reality.

Going back to practical ascension for a moment…..it feels like where life intersects with concepts, where the spiritual IDEAS that you’ve been learning, reading, and taking in actually implement IN your life and CHANGE your life. Another phase beyond the initial awakening of realizing the inner matrixes that block you and that you no longer resonate with the 3D conditioning you’ve received, and that MOST of what you’ve been taught about reality in school and in life is limited and based in fear.

The soul wakes up through this learning and taking in of ideas, this looking outward for inspiration and sources of guidance and advice. The mind is shifting in this phase, paradigms and entire schools of thought (taught through our schools mostly) are being dismantled. There is a whole bunch of rubble and ash during this phase, which I have connected with transitional fourth dimensional or 4D consciousness (which I write more about here: https://soulfullheartblog.com/2017/02/16/fourth-dimensional-4d-consciousness-alchemical-purgatory-dark-nights-and-profound-awakenings/). This can mostly be happening INTERNALLY, however, as that is where it needs to start, where the seeds of change are watered.

And then, with this watering and baking and dismantling of ideas and shifting through emotional reactions does the soul energy begin to rumble to make ACTUAL changes in your life, to have the outside reflect MORE of your inner transformation. Some of these changes happen TO you as life moves you through the necessary death and rebirth (although nothing happens to you without your participation and choice on a SOUL level). More and more changes though can happen WITH you as you move into the phase of what we could call practical ascension and a more empowered sense of activation in your life fueled by your soul’s momentum and out of the safety and comfort of your 3D self.

This is when ALL areas of your life want to move into a higher vibrational frequency of expression as more and more YOU in your soul essence wants to express and grow. In SoulFullHeart, we look at with you through sessions the seven key areas of life related to this: emotional, spiritual, physical, social, financial, and environmental. Then, we feel into with you how your 3D, 4D, and 5D self may be predominately in expression in each of these areas. There is more about this delineation in this article with some journaling questions you can ask yourself here: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/3d4d5dselvesquestions.

This is where the HOW comes in….as you then connect with aspects and parts of yourself to feel and negotiate with them around making practical changes to your life, especially within the areas which are causing you conscious suffering and capping your growth. It is the parts of us that hold the emotional body in confusion/blocked/suffering and are basically blocked or clogged frequencies, serving like boulders to block the flow of the emotional body river. NEGOTIATION really is the key word here as it allows the movements forward at a rate and pace that the parts of you that are attached to the old way can digest WITH you (‘You’ being the growing authentic and higher self embodied version of you.)

Differentiating an energy of attachment or resistance or fear as coming from a part of you immediately creates objectivity inside of you (what we call ‘defusion’) as you can now address and feel these reactions. It creates instant metaspace to say, “Part of me feels afraid” and to then BE with and feel this part of you rather than BECOMING this part of you. We often start the process with your protector part as it is negotiation with this aspect that allows for deeper access to the emotional body.

I have discovered no better HOW when it comes to moving life into a place of reflecting our deepest desires and soul expression then through the parts work process.There IS a way to actualize what you most deeply desire to BE in your life that I am inviting you into feeling if you resonate with or at least are open to exploring. Parts work is certainly not the ONLY way, yet I am pressed to offer another that is as catalytic and effective as this one is (and I have searched and researched for many years and yet always come back to parts work as my personal ground of healing and transformation along with what I feel called to offer others for close to 15 years now).There is more about parts work here: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts and I’ll be writing more and more about it as I (and the other facilitators in SoulFullHeart) engage in sessions with more people and they help us co-create it.

Navigating and embracing this parts work reality within myself and with the help of facilitators in the past is HOW I have been able to BE in a sacred union bond for nine years with Raphael Awen and have it deepen, grow, and expand into magical terrains of goodness and MEGA love. Parts work is HOW I have been able to shift a highly self conscious and unworthiness-based relationship to EVERYTHING in my life to one of unselfconsciousness, comfort in self, and self worth. It is HOW I have healed lifetimes worth of karmic playouts and binds within a relatively short period of time (more in the article I shared above about karmic healing and healing your metasoul line.) It is HOW I have been able to heal so much unconscious wounding in my emotional body and to experience life with little to NO emotional triggering or charged reactions now. It is HOW I have been able to inhabit and claim and express my soul gifts and serve love with others as my means of livelihood without compromising.

It is important to offer a HOW to you and not just a WHAT picture (although I love doing that too.) There are more and more spiritual teachers offering parts work as a key aspect of healing the emotional body wounding and more common language of inner child, inner critic, etc. And of course Carl Jung blazed the trail here before us…the emotional body has been left out in spirituality for many years yet the continual ‘proof’ of its need for healing expresses out in abuse patterns, unworthiness-based and unaware ego (another word for the 3D self) based frequencies, inability to make practical changes and navigate IN life and to integrate soul awakenings into every day life, suffering loops inside and in relationships of all kinds. The emotional body is screaming to be included in the picture and parts work dives into the waters of the emotional body immediately with immediate access.

The love that you ARE wants to come in and move through your life…to change your EVERY moment experience of experience. Of course parts of you hold fear about these changes, especially when and if they relate to other people and relationships that are entangled yet still transact love. Being with and connecting with these parts and their fear leads to more integrated self as they relax and integrate their energies over time and the stuck or wounded frequencies vibrate higher and higher. More and more then do you relate with life as a singular “I” that truly IS an I AM energy of embodied higher self frequencies pulsated with innate self worth AND visceral connection to ALL THAT IS.

 

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and teacher of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.