So much to let in on this post-Christmas day. It can be so easy for a part of us to get “back on the horse” of our daily lives and go through the motions of our routines and ‘to do’ list. When in reality so much happened! The words that were said or hadn’t been said. The moments of joy or frustration. The pings of loneliness or the wealth of good company. When we enter these celebrations, especially one as energy packed as Christmas, there is a lot that happens unconsciously that can leave us an energetic, unconscious hangover.
I was so fortunate to be in a time/space continuum yesterday that was light years ahead of what I used to inhabit. Having that multidimensional access to my past that still lives on in some echo of my emotional body, I could almost feel that ‘past’ in the Now and get a huge reflection of what parts of me were really feeling during those times. For me it was the consumption of a lot of alcohol, meat, and sweets, as well as taking in all sorts of dissonant vibrations that I wasn’t totally aware of inside myself.
Once I became aware of what was going on with parts of myself through conscious connection via journaling and meditation, there were a mountain of reactions happening inside that had no place to go. No depository of heart that felt safe enough to have it land in. Once I found that source inside myself through much reflection by my facilitators, Raphael and Jelelle, I could hold those with much compassion and find the courage to bring more truth and draw tighter boundaries.
These led to taking communicative space from my family that allowed me to really feel me. What was authentically me and what was a role I was playing to fit into the cast of characters that I did have much love for. But there came a moment in which the energetic and path differences between us became too great and I said a temporal goodbye until such time life found us in similar desires for deep healing and soul purpose.
This allowed for deep healing for my parts as well as advocating for something new and more aligned to what my soul and heart needed to grow and embody. No longer would I accept anything less than what I felt I needed and deserved as both a heart and a soul. I could feel the love for my birth family and wished them all well in there lives and journeys. They have an open invitation to the way of life that has brought me to places inside myself I can only have dreamed of not that long ago.
I felt the space between us and honored all of it. It was a deep reflection of what it may even feel like even just a short year from now with sights on expanded community, passion purpose, and geography. This is a result of deep healing and deep desire for more. I invite all of you to feel your deepest desires and calling for this next year and make it a mantra to not allow yourself, and your parts, to accept anything less than the love that you ARE no matter who it is you are in relationship to.
Your choices are the rudders to new worlds of unfathomable adventure, beauty, and purpose. Each one sends ripples into your YOUniverse and alters the very fabric of it. SoulFullHeart is here to guide you along those choice points with your sovereignty fully in tact as it can never be taken from you. Make this coming year, and more importantly this coming moment, the most real of them all.
Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.
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