healing process – Page 6 – Divine Self Embodiment Blog (Formerly SoulFullHeart)

The Desire For What Really Matters In The Ascending Masculine

Published on July 30, 2022 by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

I know some things about the ascending masculine, if I could call it that.

Men who feel a conscious desire to excel and grow and matter in life, in love, in their relationships.

I know these things about you, because I’ve come to know them in myself.

There’s always much more to come to know, and one of the growth points for this ascending masculine is the challenge and willingness to feel like a beginner over and over again, to admit that there’s so much that can’t be delineated, measured or accurately described with the mental body.

It can only be felt with the heart.

My heart wants to grow beyond what feels like present limitations. I want to grow in being transparent with my world, to hide my real self less and less and less. I want to radiate that presence in the physical world around me and into all the soul connections and timelines I’m a part of.

Nothing else ‘matters’, for all that matters comes from the divine ‘Ma-ter’, from where we derive our word ‘Mother’. She Ma-ter-ializes all things that matter to me. In union with divine father, we have a template for reparenting all the parts of us who long for reunion.

What is it that is calling for your heart attention and choice? Do you have a sense of what wants to be next for you? Are you willing to be transparent with yourself and your world about what’s not working, what hurts like hell and what you do know about your calling and being?

I’d love to serve you in that. I offer a free intro call as a way for you and I to connect to feel if the work I offer, along with my heart, feel like a fit for you. More info about that here: soulfullheart.org/sessions

It is so interesting to feel how the feminine has been willing to lead in this domain of really feeling and really healing. I personally know of several women who’s eyes are on the horizon for a man who’s ready to choose himself, his calling and purpose. Mateship offers a huge growth ground, especially when it’s mutually chosen for one’s deepest growth and learning. Maybe that’s a big one for you as it has been for me.

I very much welcome hearing from you and would love to host my free intro with you to help you feel if working together ongoingly feels like a fit for you. If not, no questions asked or anything further expected.

~ Raphael

I just got back today from a few days at the ocean with my beloved, Jelelle Awen.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc.

The SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a virtual gathering place for community engagement, exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal here: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/ for a monthly subscription of $22.22 USD

Healing Perfectionism With Divine Love

Published on July 13, 2022 by Raianna ShaiLeave a comment

By Raianna Shai

Perfectionism is expressed by many different parts of us, in varied ways and for so many reasons. I’m sure many of us can relate to the constant need to control the outcome or appearance of everything we do. The fear of doing something wrong or being judged for it is running in the background of our minds even in everyday, simple tasks. We often feel tension and anxiety when something unfolds in a way we did not expect or control. Maybe it comes up when you have reactions you don’t want to have, or there’s conflict you wanted to avoid, or you chose to do something that you realize others would judge.

Perfectionism is often used as a way to protect the most precious and vulnerable parts of us which has been so needed in certain phases of our lives. Overtime it becomes so ingrained in us from messaging by society, matrix coding from as far back as birth, personal desire to appear a certain way, and to avoid judgement and loss. But it gets to a certain point where it prevents those vulnerable parts from growing into their bigness and recognizing that they don’t need that protection to the same degree anymore.

Perfectionism for myself has been so strong my entire life. I strived to be a perfect student, perfect friend, perfect girlfriend, perfect daughter, perfect community member. And slowly but surely I’ve come to unwind this ingrained desire to avoid any and all judgement and conflict. Much of this has been rooted in the idea that I’m not good enough and that I’ll lose everything I love so much. The moment we separated from the Divine, we were given an underlying feeling of guttural and tragic loss of our home frequency of love and connection. So much unworthiness stems from that loss and everyday we try to prove we are good enough to the divine in some way, shape or form.

Freedom can be found in the moments when all parts of us are nourished and aligned: heart, body, mind, soul and spirit. When we allow ourselves to let in true divine love, we are then able to realize that we can truly do no wrong from the perspective of the Divine. This is really the only place we can find unconditional love and acceptance. When we let go of expectation, obligation and self consciousness – we find liberation.

Freedom for me was felt in the picture I’ve attached to this post. That week I felt the words from the Divine rumble through me when she said “You are my everything”. The energy and truth of these words started to unlock this strong hold parts of me had on the idea of not being good enough. We truly are everything to her – everyone of us and in every way. In the moment of this picture I stepped away from something that was bringing me tension and took in beautiful nature and sunset codes with my beloved Kasha and every part of me felt nourished and aligned.

Freedom is found when we take the time to remind every part of ourselves, even the ones that are hard to love, that they always have been and always will be good enough. Even when there’s room to grow, even when there are regrets, even when the future is unknown – they are good enough and more. And the more we see this bigness in ourselves, the more we can see and feel it in others. And from there, the love spreads like wildfire.

Love,
Raianna Shai

~~~~

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and website designer of the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about space holding sessions and free 45-min intro calls, group calls, videos, community, etc.

From Warrior To Ambassador: The Illusion Of Good vs. Evil

Published on July 7, 2022 by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

By Raphael Awen

As more and more of us become aware and convinced that the world is not as we thought it was, we’re collectively left in a vacuum of cognitive dissonance, confusion and chaos.

Personally, I’ve been convinced for many years of the horror realities of human trafficking and the depopulation agenda, and all the surrounding phenomena, but I’m finding a new layer of emotive dissonance arising inside of me in coming to terms with what’s at hand now, energized by the tsunami of collective awakening happening underway, along with the collective’s sorrow and the v. injuries and sudden deaths coming to light.

What might the scope of all this end up looking like? How long will the darkness seem to prevail?

If you also find yourself in this restlessness, whether in moments or in largely complete endless overwhelm, know that your being has a range of expressions and parts that span 3D, 4D and 5D realities. Parts of us have totally familiarized and adapted ourselves to everyday consensus reality of linearity, lack, etc that we find in 3D. But we also have parts of us that see beyond what once felt like 3D was all that there was into the realms of the chaos and transformations of 4D. Then we also have parts of us that remember the joy and harmony of union with the All, where both sorrow and joy weave in a deep aliveness expressing as the divine beings that we are in our true heart home of 5D. No need to get hung up on the definitions and labels of these dimensions or the numbering of them, but just a way to offer a sketch of a map that your heart and soul knows.

You already are and always were a multidimensional being, even as you are becoming more conscious of and in flow with this truth that always was.

There’s one piece I’d really like to share with you today in all this that I feel lays the groundwork for some real digestion of the craziness at hand. I invite you to come with me into an exploration for a few moments.

I’ll just spit it out and then take a longer look at it:

Love is the one and only source of all that is, including the darkest horrors we can imagine or witness.

We are not in a battle of good vs. evil where we must cheer on and support the good to overcome and destroy the evil.

The battle of good vs. evil is an all too real illusory reality of 3D, but one we must come to a higher vantage point to relate with if we want to navigate the horrors we are witnessing now unfolding.

Allow me to toss in a few more points here to land in your intuition where they will…

What we are at war with externally evidences an internal war happening inside of us. If the evildoers must be punished forever, then that dynamic is alive inside of us, between our Inner Punisher and other parts of us, albeit just off our radar.

What if the whole all too real reality of good vs. evil was part of the divine’s experiment and expression into duality from an original state of oneness? Very beautiful, yes, but without duality, it couldn’t be known, felt and appreciated…

What if the ratcheting up of the tension in this good vs. evil dimension is part of the divine plan for a full circle reconciliation of this experiment where the heightening of the duality creates and is necessary for our divine awakening into the love that all of us are and always were, including the ‘evildoers’?

Consciousness itself is sponsoring the entire show we are seeing unfold right now. Love is holding it all. Many souls chose on a soul level to be a part of the suffering in the 3D and 4D expression of their being as part of the contribution to this experiment that love undertook. Love knew that duality would entail suffering, but it knew that suffering would take us somewhere beyond where it was in oneness bliss. Love wanted to journey. Your and my suffering is part of the fuel of this journey.

Deep in our psyche is the awareness that sacrifice is necessary for movement into fullness. In the Christian faith, we have the teaching that ‘without the shedding of blood, there is no remission of sin’. Something has to die so that same something might come alive. In our limited 3D vision, we made that about a sin filled and separated-from-God humanity needing a personal savior from the results of a ‘fall’ into sin and God’s wrath. But what if all we actually ‘fell’ into was this chosen experiment of duality along with the attendant and necessary forgetfulness?

If that’s accurate, then those participating in the darkness are the divine’s agents as much as are the lightworkers; then the darkest deeds in your own this-life and soul history are also all part of this divine expression from oneness into duality.

And if that’s accurate, then the trajectory we are on is into remembrance, reconciliation, restoration of the All that was ‘lost’, and MORE.

This more is mysteriously unfolding in you and I, in this collective darkest night we’ve seen to date. Love is inviting us to hang around for the more, as an infinite unfolding of all that we can handle.

What can ease the intense discomfort of the moment is making for personal reconciliations within, with the parts of us who feel the deepest despair or shame, for harm caused, feeling how a divine amnesty and forgiveness extends over all of it.

Then from there, a natural and effortless expression of ‘as inside, so outside’ begins to extend from us to others. The darkest darkness is also wanting reconciliation and is spring loaded by the heightened tension and the tug of war of good vs. evil drama and trauma to return fully and suddenly to the love that it is sourced in.

Both the warrior within and without are now being invited, if and when they are ready, to lay down their weapons, reconcile the harm they’ve participated in, all the while believing they were fighting for the good, and then to accept the mantle of Ambassador, with a heart broken open and vulnerable to the great sadness, sorrow and loss that is still unfolding. All self righteousness extinguished under the infinite love and forgiveness and reconciliation with the divine experiment and journey we are all a part of. Sorrows felt, rather than medicated down or avoided. Tears wept.

Now your life, exactly as it is right now, takes on the most exquisite poignancy and meaning as a place from which to transact and make real this reconciliation within and then without. Every anxiety and depression in ‘circumstance’ a standing stone circle portal entry into this All That Is, that awaits your sovereign choice of ongoing continued awakening, at a rate and pace that allows for feeling and healing all that wants and needs to be felt and healed. Savoured, not savioured.

Jelelle’s book and audio book ‘Free To Be 5D’ are a great exploration and attunement to this more that wants to arise in you. You can find it here: https://www.soulfullheart.org/freetobe5dexcerpt

And there’s two upcoming group calls to be a part of if you’d like, Sunday, the 17th and Sunday, the 24th:

https://www.soulfullheart.org/events

If we can be of assistance here at SoulFullHeart, please dig into our free resources, connect with us in whatever ways you are guided to, and if it feels like a fit, ask for a free intro into what personal one on one sessions can look like for you. More info on that here: https://www.soulfullheart.org/sessions

May you arise daily into more and more of all that you are meant to be, even amidst the moments that feel like falling.

~ R ~

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc.

Sirius Gateway Energies and Importance Of Connecting To Your Gatekeeper

Published on July 5, 2022July 22, 2022 by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

By Jelelle Awen

We are beginning our alignment with our ‘Spiritual Sun’ Sirius as we continue in the Sirius gateway this week and bridge to the Lion’s Gate 8/8 activations through this month. This is a powerful time of soul awakenings, insights, clarities, visions, lifted veils, inspired thinking and more.

With these soul awakenings also comes an intensity of karmic frequencies moving into our auric fields, chakras, physical bodies and emotional bodies. It’s important to feel how we ARE with these frequencies, how we relate with them and accept them and allow them and what our relationship is to them.

These energies can ‘blow out’ the body in the sense of big detox reactions as some people are sharing about feeling lots of dizziness and vertigo, unable to sleep or feeling very fatigued, and even more extreme ‘illness’ that really wipes them out for quite awhile. This detox process for the ‘transitioning body’ is greatly served by a very clean diet or even fasting and a daily celery juice cleanse. I share more about that here: https://soulfullheartblog.com/…/light-body-body…/

Your soul field can become backed up with the codes that are trying to come in right now. I see this in energy healing work where the space above the crown chakra (where the Ascension chakras of soul star, Personal Sun and casual are located) is just pulsing and full with light codes that aren’t being brought into the field. This can cause more body pain, especially head/neck pain and even severe migraines. Along with emotional pain and ongoing suffering as many awakening souls are experiencing…intense feelings of heaviness, hopelessness, and not wanting to ‘be here’ in the Earth Plane anymore.

Connecting with your Gatekeeper, a soul aspect that we bridge to in our SoulFullHeart work, allows for much more flow and integration of these energies. As you consciously feel your Gatekeeper, this allows them to share with you their experience of guarding your soul and keeping the veil down on your awareness of other lifetimes/soul ‘history’, etc. They are holding back often deep persecution wound experiences as they fear it would harm your ‘human’ and be too much for you to bear.

I was connecting to my Gatekeeper this morning and I could feel a resolution to her ongoing push/pull about opening up these places for me and flowing into service with them. She has admittedly given me access to many places of remembrance and to service over the years, yet not as much to connect with her as directly, until the last year or so. She was in teary confession this morning about this and deep gratitude for my human heart and Divine Mother’s heart that has opened up HER heart and not given up on her. It is not easy for these eternal beings to let in love and care and warmth as they have not known any of that usually, choosing to be cut off from it to large degree.

Gatekeepers live in complete isolation, by choice, as they are the only conscious entity aware of the Metasoul’s (as I’ve been guided to call it) many projected versions into different lifetimes/timelines/eras. They are acutely aware of the karmic energies, the trauma and the pain being worked and experienced by EVERY lifetime, yet they are unable to do anything to relieve it. These ‘keepers of the veil’ within our soul have taken on the often thankless task of remaining awake to track and protect us while we go into necessary sleep states to fully experience what each lifetime wants to teach us.

I have met and connected with many Gatekeepers in sessions over the years and they are universally lonely, often heavy and sad, skeptical and distrusting….at least in their ‘trailing edge’ of expression. In their ‘leading edge’ expression, they are wise, compassionate, and open up access to Divine channels, other lifetime access, integration of light codes and upgrades, and much more. Yet, they are often anchored to lower frequencies, especially of lower 4D ‘False Light’ which they can get lost in for many ions (no time really.)

It feels like the Sirius frequencies are inviting the Gatekeepers to consciously come forward and make themselves known to you. I cannot describe to you how much relief and goodness can come into your life through connecting to yours and feeling them…and clair activations, access to other lifetimes, emotional healing, completion of karmic cycles FOR GOOD, openness and draw of your sacred union mate and soul family community, etc. Often what we feel as ‘guides’ is actually the wisdom of our Gatekeeper coming through channeling our soul yet not in a direct way.

And ALL of this is opened from inside of you, not from an outside source reading you out or providing activations for you. We can only be a mirror for another, lighting the way and shining the light based on what we have journeyed. And this is my light illuminating this path of connection to soul aspects such as the Gatekeeper and parts of the self too and all the gifts it offers!

love,

Jelelle Awen

Here is a guided meditation and more teaching about the Gatekeeper, really good timing to connect with yours during this Sirius gateway: https://youtu.be/bGqTeeaYpwc

I offer free intros and 1:1 sessions with women to open up access to your Gatekeeper and deepen this bond to allow much more of your soul consciousness to flow and move through. I am experiencing Gatekeepers coming forward in someone even during the intro recently, wanting to be seen and felt! They are def waking up now! More info about sessions with me and other SoulFullHeart Facilitators at soulfullheart.org/sessions or PM me.

I share much more about the Gatekeeper as well in my book Free To Be 5D, with links to purchase audio book, ebook, PDF, print editions at soulfullheart.org/books

Moving Beyond Fear-Based ‘Tolerance’ Of Dissonance During Awakenings & Growth

Published on May 19, 2022June 3, 2022 by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kasha Rokshana

“Tolerance” is really such a terrible word. I don’t particularly like it. Because it makes parts of us feel like they are obliged to let things go that really they shouldn’t have to. It’s one of the most misinformed tenants of modern society. Tolerance is not compassion or understanding, let alone love, and it actually typically comes from fear, especially the fear of you yourself not being ‘tolerated’ let alone actually felt or understood.

If you find yourself tolerating a dead marriage, a dead relationship to birth family, a dead connection to your livelihood, rather than seeking and humbly taking risks for the sake of aliveness, then you’re likely in a place of having been coached, told, conditioned into feeling like as long as you’re tolerating these dead things, you’re ‘doing something right’ and dare I say, even reaching the carrot of ‘enlightenment’.

No one is entitled to your tolerance, not even the parts of you that ask for it. Just as people on the outside of you basically tell you ‘don’t look over here, you have to accept me as I AM’, parts of you can do that too. They don’t want you to see their manipulative strategies or ways of controlling the people in your life that you don’t resonate with so that they don’t have to experience real and true growth and what actually COULD become possible in ALL of your relationships.

Tolerance becomes intolerance, sometimes quickly, as awakenings happen and these awakenings lead quickly to depression and anxiety when this intolerance is not honoured or felt. You are changing. And if you’re a big soul, you’ve likely felt how quickly you change and shift at times and are oftentimes tiptoeing around your relationships rather than letting your awakenings truly ride with you into a new life phase.

Death and rebirth is always a part of awakening, whether it’s the kind of death and rebirth that is very, very dark for a time or the kind that is actually much easier to move through. I can assure you though, that if parts of you still buy the 3D Matrix or New Age Spirituality Matrix shit of ‘you have to find a way to make this work because that’s what real love does’, then you are in for more difficulty, not less, whether it manifests in physical illness, emotional waves you fall under rather than feel able to come to terms with (note, I didn’t say ‘control’), or a feeling of existential crisis that keeps growing until parts of you can no longer stuff it down.

Awakening, truly expanding into your heart and soul and letting them lead, is not about tolerating anything or anyone. Yet, as this intolerance is felt and honoured, true compassion can be felt as well as authentic passion. You change, and even if the people around you can’t, you are empowered to navigate your way through that and find new people to be around, even if you need a phase of being ‘alone’ (which is never alone, truly, for the Divine is ALWAYS there and sometimes it takes the lonely feelings to actually drop into Its arms at last).

If you truly have a penchant for your deepest growth, you’ll find a way to feel what you’ve been allowing that actually doesn’t feel good to you. Our gut honesty is what brings us the most growth and the most Divine alignment, even in all its messiness and absolute dearth of glamour. There is NO such thing as an ‘ugly cry’, especially when what you’re feeling is the grief of what perhaps once worked, what once was beautiful and resonant, and you’re feeling into letting it go for the sake of all involved…

I love you. Keep feeling. Keep moving beyond tolerance and you WILL find your truth, whether you end up needing to move into deep life change right away or not. Your awakenings will deepen and your experience of your soul will too, even in all of the waves of exquisite sadness, necessary rage, and openings into bittersweet bliss.

Love,
Kasha

***

Kasha Rokshana is a Divine Feminine Love Ambassador, SoulFullHeart Women’s Facilitator, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about space holding sessions and free 45-min intro calls, group calls, videos, community, etc.

My Process Of Transitioning To Living On Less Food and More Prana/Light – Day 5

Published on May 13, 2022May 28, 2022 by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

By Jelelle Awen

As I move into my fifth day of juice fasting/transitioning to living on more prana, the sound bowls are food right now, as is my daily soaks in the sun and Himalayan/epsom salt baths and vinyasa yoga flows. I also engaged in a deep pranayama breathing practice this morning that brought me into a deep bliss and relaxation space, theta brainwave place, for over two hours.

It’s amazing how your soul kicks in when you start letting go of what you’ve been previously been using as ‘fuel’. All of the ways of bringing more energy/light/love into your field and body come forward, out of more need and necessity than previously. Eventually it just becomes the new ‘rewired’ system as the old programmings fall away.

I feel that I’ve moved out of the detox phase where all the yuckies you’ve eaten start coming out of your pores, coating your tongue, making some aches in the back, etc. Other than a period of having a headache for awhile and a coated tongue (relieved by a tongue scraper), I haven’t had many detox symptoms this time. The first time I did a water fast three years ago, the detox was so intense that I had to stop after a few days. I’ve learned now how to negotiate this phase and what supports me through it.

EVERY phase and stage of this body detoxing/upgrading process is sacred and needed. There isn’t an ‘end goal’ or ‘failing’ or ‘succeeding’. It is a linear process yet rather a circular one that invites you into different initiations as you go.

This does feel like such a supportive time to moving into a phase of letting food go/fasting (for however long you feel to), with the continual solar flares and CMES coming in (even if they don’t interface with Gaia’s atmosphere.) Just laying out in the sun for even 10 minutes brings in a powerful supportive energy boost that feels like you’ve eaten a full meal!

I can feel the lunar eclipse in the grids as well and the relief from the Matrix moon hijack that it will offer. The sacred feminine pure frequencies can flow through during that 84 minute window. Join Raphael and I on Sunday at 5pm London time/12:00pm EST/9:00am for a livestream on FB where we will feel into these eclipse energies and how you may be experiencing them on physical/emotional/soul/energy levels. We will offer a brief guided meditation as well to help with digestion and integration of them. You can watch us live or catch the recording.

Galactic activations are strong right now too….as we move into crop circle transmission season and I can feel the codes I received when I visited two of them in the UK last year coming through. My Arcturian aspect Binkh is coming into my awareness again, offering inspirations and some channeled messages that feels like will start to be shared too.

I missed her even though she never left me….my consciousness went where it needed to go into lower 4D to do some mega karmic soul clearing of priestess lifetimes. I feel freed up, lighter, less reactive over all, and as if the lighthouse lens of my soul beacon has been cleaned up!

If you feel drawn to connect around any of these places I’m describing and receive a personal bridging around them, I’m available for 1:1 sessions or a free intro with women, more info at soulfullheart.org/sessions.

Much love to you on this ‘sacred’ day of Friday the 13th as the Divine Feminine arises anew in all of her forms,

Jelelle Awen

I describe more about my process of transitioning to living on more prana and less food here: https://soulfullheartblog.com/…/my-process-of…/

And I had some feline assistance today while I played my sound bowls! Ravyn our cat has become fascinated by them after initially running out of the room whenever we played them (pic above of her paw extended to touch the heart chakra bowl while I played it!) She is vibing into the frequency now as animals are SO tuned into energy, they are a good barometer around if energy is good or not.

The Causes Of Inner Work & Ascension ‘Burnout’

Published on May 9, 2022May 28, 2022 by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kasha Rokshana

https://youtu.be/AIedzqNCk24

It’s not uncommon to hear about how burnt-out, frustrated, and DONE people feel when it comes to their own Ascension and awakening journeys. There are so many things that can make someone feel this way and there are different ways to look at why this is happening, from the inside out.

Join Kasha as she launches into a discussion about what’s in her heart about this topic/obstacle and what the factors may be that have led up to it. She offers her sense of how being inundated with ‘spiritual teachings’ and mandates around ‘do this, not that!‘ can play a role in making parts of you feel overwhelmed and ready to give up. Also, many offerings don’t seem to truly give you handrails and active support, let alone heart warmth, and also can blow you/parts of you out (sometimes even on purpose) with over-confrontation and an outside-in orientation to healing that does nothing to empower you to hold your own process. Kasha offers that while confrontation may be necessary at times, peak experiences or intense ‘retreats’ can actually traumatize your parts/Metasoul aspects more so than offer true healing, integration, and a sense of who you truly are.

Kasha goes into more details about all of this and more surrounding what may or may not be your specific circumstances around feeling ‘burned out’ on your personal journey. This is just the tip of the iceberg too, as really this is such a big topic to dive into and is really so personal to everyone who feels it.

Here is a guided meditation to help you connect with your Gatekeeper: https://youtu.be/bGqTeeaYpwc

For more information about the SoulFullHeart quantum healing process, Jelelle Awen’s latest book Free To Be 5D, videos, and events, visit https://www.soulfullheart.org.

We also invite you to join us for affordable membership on our private, online community SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks for sharing, asking questions, and connecting with others: https://soulfullheartportal.mn.co/feed

For more information about a free intro call to find out more about 1:1 sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, visit http://www.soulfullheart.org/sessions

***

The No Man’s Land Of Our Collective Grief

Published on May 5, 2022 by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

By Raphael Awen

If we take a step outside of this most challenging polarity moving through us right now as a species, we see where there’s something none of us really comfortable feeling.

If the anti injection people are correct, then there’s a wave of destruction and fear that is already here and scaling up at a pace we can only guess at.

If the pro experimental injection people are correct, then our sovereignty and autonomy is best left in the hands of a governing body who are better equipped to lead our lives.

Either way, we are giving up something of such huge proportions. I don’t think there’s a single one of us yet who’s felt the deepening scale of this.

Raging at it, or turning over and accepting it feel like two polarized ways of starting to work through it, but there’s still a huge no man’s land that I haven’t seen anyone step into.

In that no man’s land is something to feel.

Trying to describe it almost does it a disservice, for it can only really be felt, not described. But it has something to do with mourning and grief on a scale we haven’t known in this life.

Life as you and I knew it is changing rapidly, daily and minute by minute. Something big is dying and not returning, regardless of which side of the issue(s) you find yourself on.

People on both sides of the polarity believe they have spared themselves from some personal suffering. ‘According to their beliefs’, as Yeshua would say, ‘so be it unto them’. Beliefs are such strong personal reality creators, but they only go so far.

There’s a shared reality that whether it’s recognized or not, is happening. That reality is the shared boat we are sailing in. The hole in your end of the boat IS actually an issue to me. There’s only one boat, even as we are afforded individual bubbles within that boat, but OUR boat is sinking.

We all chose to be a part of this transition, and to give up a quality of an old life to be a part of anchoring in a new life. Whether you are injection injured, (and my heart breaks for you if you are) or out promoting getting the next booster, we are going somewhere.

There’s somewhere we won’t be returning to.

That change calls into question every plan, every intention, every purpose, every sense of meaning. All of it is up for continual revision as we sort through what can and does feel crazy making and disorienting.

Nothing makes sense in the old way. In the interim, we’re all grasping for the new way that isn’t quite here yet.

I don’t know any other way to be with it, other than to feel this surrender to what is, open my heart to being further activated into this care for myself and our beautiful collective that would choose such transition through such confusion as a planetary group soul’s higher choice and service to the divine’s unfolding of itself through us.

WE chose this. WE created it. The polarity is of OUR creation. When you accept that, you get baptized into being a YOU in service of the WE.

You get to care. You get to feel. You get to mourn. You get to weep the tears others aren’t ready yet to weep. You even get to thrive in love as you take part in honoring the death all around.

You get to be in the real moment that is here now.

And in that moment we see that the deeper our polarities, the deeper our shared reality.

Raphael

We are offering a gathering place of community engagement around a shared new experience of life in community, vulnerability and transparency at https://soulfullheartportal.mn.co/, in exchange for $22.22 USD per month. If you feel drawn, we would love to have you join us.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc.

Spiritual Mastery As An Avoidance Of Vulnerability

Published on May 5, 2022 by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

By Raphael Awen

The path of spiritual mastery or attainments has been basically useless to me for several years, other than to often trip me up in comparison or self judgment games.

The thing was, I used to be able to muster some impressive consistent self discipline and regimen, set goals and stick to them, and that way of being in life doesn’t let go easily, even as it collapses at the same time.

I don’t think I’m alone in this by a long shot. I think what I’m feeling personally is more of a reflection of what the masculine is coming to terms with now as consciousness itself shifts and changes.

Mastery served us well for a time to come to know our power. It moved us from an inferiority complex, but now threatens us with a superiority complex. Both however are non-relational and both are non-vulnerable, and both don’t actually have mastery over anything in the bigger picture of what we really want and need.

At nineteen, I went out jogging every single day for over a year, without missing a day, rain, snow or shine. How I felt didn’t matter, other than holding onto this feeling of I can do whatever I set my mind to. I thought at the time that I’d do this for the rest of my life, because with each passing day, my record of achievement was getting bigger, better as well as harder to lose.

That’s the thing with attainment and spiritual masteries. They are like rolling a stone up a hill that will one day succumb to gravity, and the higher up you roll the stone, the greater its velocity and path of destruction to your self perception and who knows what else when it gives way to nature, as it is sure to do one day.

Men particularly have been so addicted to doing the right thing and the good thing, the thing that once did have meaning, purpose and even connection, with love, life and nature, that they naturally fear letting go of. It matters less how noble the thing, just heaven forbid that you should be without some animating thing.

How could something so good lose its value over time?

If all this mastery and attainment grasping is becoming an old way, is there a new way that wants to come in its place? I have my ideas and answer to this, but do you have a sense of your arising truth around this?

Maybe mastery was just a placeholder holding us as men in a place of being mastered over, until we were ready to enter a whole new dimension of mystery, coming to know our power through the doorway of vulnerability and transparency?

Paul talked about the ‘schoolmaster of the law’ being over us until being introduced to Christ consciousness, which is more about being changed in core nature. Was he already hinting at this two thousand years ago?

It seems the old way of gaining mastery was really about gaining mastery over our vulnerability and never having to be transparent. We were holding a suppressive lordship over ourselves.

You may still be feeling like a millionaire holding some masteries, but I’ll bet life isn’t supporting you any longer to naturally sustain that. All the millionaires and billionaires of today are finding it harder and harder and super costly to effort sustaining those holdings.

These feelings are coming up for me today as I have an opportunity to have a session later today with a dynamic man and big soul who has a heartcry unfolding. I could feel some tension inside and went inwards to feel what it was about.

I connected with all of my inner masculine aspects of me from this life and other timelines that I feel living in me differentiated and unique, and asked their reactions to meeting with a man.

Here’s the pieces that came back to me in dialogue with them. (It feels good to get to the underlying push and pull and where and how it lives in parts of us and their needs. Now, we don’t try and fix the fade on one mastery with another mastery campaign somewhere else.)

“I don’t like men who speak their truth as thee truth without acknowledging their belief system that gave birth to those truths. They don’t feel safe or kind.” Marvin

“I don’t feel comfortable being around men who energize their spiritual mastery or attainments. It doesn’t feel real to me. If they are onto something, I feel stuck in a comparison game or left out. Mastery just hasn’t worked for me in decades. The mastery path as we’ve known it feels non relational and non vulnerable.” Wayne

“I’d like to serve men again. I feel trust that we know we won’t hurt or harm without care and kindness, but I also know that we and you and us are going to need to be awake, ready, in our stance, on our game, with our truth, not letting reactions get internalized. Men are looking for a mirror of truth.” Arthur

“You have a magic in you, Raphael, and that gets to come out and serve and be given when you simply be you, transparenting whatever you are feeling. I like serving men because then we get to dance in the magic and be around other mens magic too.” Charles

“What an opportunity to feel the heartbeat and heartcry of men, instead of dominating or controlling them. They aren’t / we aren’t that complex in some ways. We just want connection, meaning, and purpose” Lionel

Thanks for reading, especially as a man, and maybe as a woman, you can feel this as the masculine polarity inside of you and one that is or is wanting to transmute into these new directions?

I’m curious!

~ R ~

Our online portal is one gathering place for the new. You can find it here: https://soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

Big heartfelt acknowledgement and thank YOU to Gabriel Amara for leading this charge with me while we surrender to divine timing for more men in the room.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc.

Bearing The Burden Of Love’s Unsolvable Mystery

Published on May 5, 2022 by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

By Raphael Awen

Realizing that all of your awakening is only ever but a measure is humbling. Then realizing that infinity bears no measure is more humbling still.

We are all in the awakening and we are all in the slumber. Love is playing with us, dancing with us, wanting to come to know itself through us, knowing that it never will and never wants to because of its own infinity. It just does what it does for the joy, reverence awe and wonder of it all.

Love invites you to meet with it there, in the unknown, in the surrender, where every mistake is an infinite success, where every pain is the source of unspeakable healing.

You bear the burden of love’s unsolvable mystery.

You can’t be solved or fixed because even your belief that you needed fixing is all a part of this mystery of being.

This being that you are; infinite, pretending with your measuring tape; omniscient, pretending to be missing a memo; omnipresent, pretending to be in one place at one time; omnipotent, pretending to be lacking something, ALL is love at play.

You have lots of awakening to do, but not for the attainment of it, for it literally gets you nowhere.

But when you get there, you won’t ever want to go back, and you won’t want to stop dancing with this love moving through you.

Xo,

~ R ~

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc.

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