Healing The Family Legacy That Lives Within

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Within most (if not each) of us, lies an heirloom that has been handed down over the generations. In a non-linear way of feeling it, this heirloom is a legacy, or a theme, that each soul of a blood family has chosen to work. This legacy is what keeps them bound, until at such point, one or more of the souls chooses to heal beyond it, and into a new legacy that is founded on growth and a deep transformative union with Love.

This legacy is a way most members of a family, through the generations, have chosen to view and relate to the world. It may all come out in different forms and functions, but there is a connector that seems to run underground, or in computer speak, run in the background. It can range from depression, to rage, to anxiety, to control. It can be subtle, or obvious. It can live in us and be expressed in different ways. Some may cover it over with busyness (business), religion, sex, and other pursuits of “happiness”, or others may be deeply steeped in the legacy trying to find answers, or a way “out”.

For either one, it is part of the way back to Self and Love. To Self-Love. It is a very core wound that is almost a secret in a way. The elephant in the family room, so to speak.  When you get down deep enough it eventually leads to Fear and our separation from Source, but it has its own flavor and frequency.  One that acts an anchor to 3D and keeps us coming back to heal what we came here to heal; that which we were born to love and let go of.

For me, I am unearthing a deep family wound that is rooted in self-punishment and a deep distrust in life itself.  I can see and feel the family tree of this theme and it lies at its roots. Watered by the choices I made to keep the tree growing until it was time to leave the tree and be planted in different soil.  Soil that is nourished with Love and not Fear. I have begun connecting with a part of me that is named after my grandfather.  His name holds the legacy, so it is more than just him I am connecting with, but his spirit is also a part of it. You could also connect with a last name that anchors that frequency. It is a very powerful relationship to a very powerful conditioning.

This energy holds a key to our movement from 3D into 4D and beyond. It is a root anchor that can serve as a launching pad as we begin the inner work of connecting, caring, loving, and collaborating with it. At first it is a very intense frequency due to the amount of energy the collective family has put into it. But you wouldn’t have chosen to heal it if you weren’t big enough to handle it. For our 3D self, this is the biggest purpose it has in our ascension process.

Even though I chose to draw a boundary with my family years ago, this legacy continued to inform the way I related to my healing and relationships to others within community.  It is a set of heart glasses that are almost permanently affixed until such time they are ready to be noticed and taken off to see and feel the world in a more truer way. It is a doorway into a whole new way of BEing and feeling myself that has many gifts in its wake. And for that I am feeling compassion and gratitude for what this heirloom has offered me.  May it also serve to heal those that I grew up so intimately with in their pursuit of Real Love.

If you feel resonance with this family legacy and have the desire to go IN and heal it, SoulFullHeart offers a path and process to take you from where you are and guide you through the different aspects and parts of yourself to unearth and heal all the remaining anchors to 3D life that are bringing you pain and a capped relationship to Love.  Visit www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/services for more information.  We offer a free 30-minute intro session to how SoulFullHeart could serve you in your healing journey.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Equinox Energy Update: Finding Balance and Trust In The Midst Of UPHeaval

By Jelelle Awen

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The EQUInox passage happening….an invitation for balance in a phase of seemingly extreme upheaval in Gaia’s weather manifestations and some personal inner chaos too to push up the most tender and core wound levels to be felt and healed. How do you find balance in the midst of such a collective and personal time of transition and shifting consciousness?

Coming into balance has a changing definition during this phase of the ascension process then it did before. It isn’t about just finding calm, peacefulness, centeredness, not being reactive, suppressing all ‘negative’ emotions. It isn’t about just meditating away your tensions and anxieties and fears. It is about integrating what got downloaded to you during the total eclipse in August (and with ALL the intense energies in August) that offered your highest timeline service of love here…integrating this download WITH the reactions that come up in response to this from your emotional body.

You are being given tastes, glimpses, dreams, senses, synchs, new connections, resources, transitions, death AND rebirth opportunities to embody this new timeline choice point by choice point. You are being offered external shifts that are ‘happening to you’ and yet really are happening WITH you on the soul level IF you hadn’t proactively made some of these changes yourself. Experiencing seemingly random ‘weather events’, for example, can offer this opportunity in a catalytic and powerful way (in collaboration with your soul/higher self) that parts of you may not allow you to make otherwise.

Balance in the now comes from the return to a sense of trust and surrender even when (and ESPECIALLY WHEN) your life is in upheaval. Even when loss is much more common than gains; even when you are saying ‘no’ more than ‘yes’. Even when material things have been taken from you; even when what you previously thought was your soul purpose work has fallen away; even when your most beloved animal companions have left you (which seems to be happening quite a lot right now!); even when your previously comfortable relationships no longer work for you and need to complete. When it seems as if the highest timeline dream is farther away than ever AS the old collapses around you, and yet somehow you return to trust that it is ALL right in the bigger picture. You feel how what is being lost is only making room for the new to come in. You are experiencing the necessary void before the new manifests.

The anchors to 3D life seem somehow more obvious than ever in this phase. This can leave you feeling like you aren’t as ‘far along’ in your awakening as you previously thought you were. The 3D anchors of your 3D self are meant to be MORE in your face so that they will receive loving attention from your heart. Sometimes they become painfully obvious as the tug and pull becomes more conscious and the suffering that they cause or the undigested woundings that still need to be felt become more clear. This is about making way for the higher timeline reality, so the previous traumas need to be triggered to be felt some how and in some way. What has been able to be avoided or transcended or diverted no longer can be. Balance is discovered in holding space for the process of feeling it all, reliving it with the 3D parts of you that are experiencing it.

Balance sometimes looks like trusting that you are being guided even as you are more lost than found…..somehow feeling secure even in the jumping off of cliffs into the unknown rather than clinging to what has been known. Turning away from consciousness states that feel good and high in order to ‘go down’ to be with what most needs your attention. We are being invited to TRUST what is happening to us as we align with what we are here to BEcome and live out as we continue to move into the new together……finding a NEW kind of balance from within as connected to Divine Source.

~

Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about a FREE intro session with a SoulFullHeart facilitator, group calls, videos, retreats, etc.

Holding Space With Loving Presence For Your Most Tender Processes

By Jelelle Awen
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It seems to be about the tender feelings and processes lately…going into the vulnerable places, the previously hidden nooks and crannies of our emotional and soul bodies. If you are feeling a lot, things you haven’t felt in awhile or at a deeper level or brand NEW textures that come from a core place within, the invitation is to go within and accept with love and curiosity what wants to come up and be felt. The high vibe cosmic Divine frequencies coming in since the beginning of the year and especially the last couple of months water us with love so that we CAN be with our pains and our vulnerabilities. The high makes room for the low; the up allows for the down.

I am feeling this too and have been holding space to feel the root cause within me of a seemingly universal wound around being unwanted and rejected by 3D life AT birth and even in the womb. I have been reliving my first weeks after birth and being with in loving presence my baby self. I was six weeks premature, so my first experiences of 3D life were spent in an incubator, under artificial lighting, in a clinical hospital environment without my parents around. My baby self was touched very little by human hands, yet I am remembering how spirit guides and Mother Mary were lovingly around as my soul made a choice whether to leave or to stay. It was very tempting to leave and I felt the textures of that in my emotional body recently, the visceral feelings of it, which years of parts work process have given me access to as I have cleared out and healed much else that I have experienced here within my 3D self.

I surrendered to this emotional healing journey as I know and trust it will bring the gifts of deeper incarnation here, a fuller choice to BE HERE NOW and will serve the ascension process of bringing my sacred humanity/higher self into my human body. Thank the Divine for parts work and the SoulFullHeart process that allows for a bridge to the unknown/emotional body/unconscious mind and the constant self permission/support of my beloveds to go where is needed within me.

So much can be used to avoid feeling, as you’ve been trained in 3D living to distract, divert, and disconnect from your feeling states and emotional body. Your beloved spiritual practices and even the constant care and feeding of high vibe frequency states can be used this way. Often this is a protective part of you that is using spiritual vibes to bypass or avoid going into uncomfortable feeling states. This part of you may not feel that you could ‘handle’ to feel your own pain or to relive the places again that remain undigested in your emotional body. Negotiation and connection with this Protector inside of you as a separate part of you, such as what we offer in the SoulFullHeart process, invites this part to JOIN you in the healing exploration, to reveal to you what needs your love and attention.

You have this tremendous capacity to feel it ALL as is contained in your sacred human heart, a fractal capacity expression from Infinite Love Divine Source. Huge potential within your heart to act as your own midwife, parent, and healer. The depths of compassion, forgiveness, and responsiveness that you can feel toward YOURSELF are limitless………as are the gifts that this self love alchemy gives you every time that you are willing to go within to offer your love where it is most needed.

We now offer a free intro session to give you a sense and taste of the SoulFullHeart process that empowers your capacity to hold and respond to yourself, negotiate with the protector and other 3D aspects, and receive loving support along the way.

~
Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about a FREE intro session with a SoulFullHeart facilitator, group calls, videos, retreats, etc.

Our Inner Teenager: The Heart And Soul Of Our 3D Self

 

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The Land of Confusion.  The volatile teenage heart. These are the years of many of our intense experiences with our fading childhood and impending entry into adulthood. These are the times that many of us can go back to and see a scene that our inner teenager lives in.  Those poignant moments that this part of us still lives in that shifted the direction of their life and has yet to fully process it all.  So many different social and familial pressures that left us in a state of tug of war…or just plain war. Those on the healing journey are on it to recover from these very times. Those very moments still burned into the lining of our heart. They are the heart and soul of our 3D Self.

Our inner teenager houses so much of our passion, desire, and dreamer.  Many chose to roll down the rebel road and set fire to whatever could be set fire to, looking for anything that was real in a very unreal world. Others found themselves playing by the rules, suppressing anything that would go against the direction of the greater wave of what was expected of them.  Then there were the in-betweens, never quite comfortable with either. This part of us is so prevalent in our lives.  Without a mature template to walk us through the valley of this very trying time we were left with an imprint that carries on to this day in the way we hold our own 3D health and maturity.

The inner teenager can be seen in our rebellion and our conformity.  It can be found in our relationships and our sexuality.  In the way we need to be by ourselves or the need to be with others.  They are in the closed door bedroom with headphones on, or in the late night party trying to see if they will be noticed by anyone “important” or “hot”. They may even be the default parent and is nowhere close to being like the “others”.  All of this is a part of their heart story that is so needing and wanting to be felt in the depths by someone who is able to deal with the gravity and levity of a teenager.

Going into the world of our inner teenager brings us closer the passion, imagination, and creativity we had to set aside for various reasons.  It is about feeling the loss of innocence that led us to so much serious. They are the bridge from our youth to our maturity.  They are truly seers of new worlds. Healing our inner teenager brings a new vision of life that has technicolor rad-ness and infinite vision.  It brings a joy and lightness that seeks to learn and have fun at the same time. So not like school!

My inner teenager wants to say, “It was never about what I wanted to be when I ‘grew up’, it was about what I was feeling about myself in the moment that mattered most. Having someone I respected feel it with me, not to fix me, just to feel me. I just wanted to live and experience life from place that I felt comfortable in my own skin and didn’t have to impress upon anyone to be accepted, for I hadn’t accepted myself. I wanted know what real masculinity was that wasn’t false bravado. I wanted to know what true love really was that wasn’t based in what I had or didn’t have. I just wanted to feel the courage to be me and not an image to hide behind.”

The gifts abound form this relationship within and we can find ourselves being the parent our inner teenager always wanted us to be, even as we are being challenging with a compassionate heart. The healed teenager integrates into our maturing heart and leads us to new vistas of brave new worlds they always wanted to visit.

 

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Wealth Of Your Woundedness

By Jelelle Awen

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The preciousness of your vulnerability…that which is often hidden away, like a buried treasure within your emotional body. Buried to keep it safe by the part of you that protects and guards and has ALWAYS needed to since you came here to 3D life and confronted the harshness of separation and duality.

The tenderness of your pain…that which expresses in tears that you may hide behind your hands or save for private and alone times to express and still do. Learning to cry without sound as a child or teenager, preferring to let it out in the sanctuary of your bedroom or other private space.

The wealth of your woundedness…that which can feel like a curse or a burden to parts of you, yet actually contains gifts, these textures of previously undigested traumas opening up rich landscapes of feeling, inspiration, compassion for yourself and others.

All these previously hidden things are looking for the light of your day to shine on them. Inviting them out of the shadows, to be embraced, cared for, and SEEN. Your beloved and loyal protector showing you where they have been buried, so you can feel and heal together. Divine energies, Divine mama and Divine papa when needed, create the safety, offering the right timings and phases, the supportive container within to hold the emotive explorations.

Your higher self and soul coming into your body…coming in to infuse you with courage for the journey into the deeper depths of densities and suppressed feelings in your emotional body and in your Metasoul/other lifetimes. The bliss of this soul reunion allows for the downward digging that grounds in the higher frequencies into your heart.

The wealth of your woundedness…..the repeated beacon of your pain that is triggered by crashing romances, clashing relationships, conflicts and tensions, changes and transitions. Life continually bringing you ALL that you need to heal if you will just accept it as such and turn inward to see what it is offering you about you. The beacon of your pain calls you to go within; it calls you to discover the inner treasures; it calls you to return home to yourself over and over again.

~

Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about a FREE intro session with a SoulFullHeart facilitator, group calls, videos, retreats, etc.

The Buried Treasures Of Our 3D Self

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Sitting. Meditating. Thoughts swirling all around. Analyzing, comparing, judging, questioning, doubting, wondering, and hiding. I can feel the density of it all and yet my highest heart and soul is holding it all with care and compassion. I am on a path. A journey. One that has chosen to come to terms with these 3rd Dimensional polarities and woundings inside me as beloved parts of my Highest Self.

I can remember the days before beginning this process.  The days where I would be looking for any form of relief I could find to make all the intense inner energies just go away.  Not be felt anymore. This ranged from self-help to spirituality to substance abuse. Using movies, food, exercise, sex and socializing as ways to cover over what was so front and center in my emotional body. Yet I just couldn’t find the courage to really go IN and deal with it all, for I could intuitively feel that if I did, a part of me would have to let go of all the suffering it had been used to as Life itself.  It was an existential identification with the pain in a way.  Who would I be without it?

It almost seems odd to feel that a part of us would be addicted to something so painful. But when you make the choice to finally go into the hard-to-feel places, you realize how much of this part of you has been invested in it.  That it has become its world. It has substituted something much smaller in place of what is much bigger, yet it hasn’t quite picked up on that until it has been given the time and space to feel and see it.

This is where the 3D self begins to recognize all that it has done to make life navigable and bearable. Even using higher frequencies to by-pass the lower ones. It is a tricky circumstance because it all feels right until what remains unfelt comes back again and again.  The oil of our wounding continues its ascension just as much as our consciousness. I can feel that in meditation.

As we have been developing the SoulFullHeart process more clearly, with an emphasis on the 3D Self in the beginning, I can feel all those nooks and crannies that still hold court inside my emotional body.  They don’t hold the same power as they once did but they are there nevertheless. It has been generally referred to as our Ego, and it is something that has gotten some negative publicity.  Something to transcend rather than heal and transform. This aspect of us is a very important part of our ascension as it holds so many traumas and fears. It is seeking love and integration, not annihilation.

So in this moment I hold those fears, judgments, and doubts as sacred beings inside my heart. They are the keys to new worlds inside me and a transformation of the world outside. I can feel some difficult things that still need my attention and that means I am on the right path.  Not that the path is meant to be hard, it is just that we set up some challenges for ourselves to live our way through so we can find out what it is we are truly all about and what we are not.

This new focus has lit up something in my own journey, and when you start to feel these hidden wounds within the context of a larger process, you too will begin to realize how much gold has been buried inside you awaiting your harvest. All held by the love of your Higher 5D Self and your Divine Parents.  They are what brings us to the next going-on place toward our greatest calling in the service of love.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Patiently Loving Your Deepest Densities Through The Push And Pulls

By Jelelle Awen

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Push and pull….wanting to love and then resisting love. Wanting to change and then resisting change. Opening UP WIDE and then closing in again. These bliss moments are of heart doors swinging open and your heart pouring out to touch ALL of life. These mess moments are the heart doors shutting and your heart retracting again in pain.

These bliss mess moments of push and pull ARE your awakening process of heart and soul. Why would it be JUST bliss when this is not what you have known here in 3D living? Why would it be JUST about the highs when this has not been the reality you’ve experienced here? And, what is really learned from only UPs with no downs?

It is during the climbs and the crawls for which you learn the most about the substance for which you are made….in contrast to that which you are NOT. 3D reality doesn’t honor the climb, the process, the journey….yet wants the results and the gifts immediately. It wants the quick fixes rather than the long term gains.

A patience for the process allows that with UPs there will come downs too and wants BOTH. Your soul can hold space for the part of you formed in 3D life to learn, to sort it out, to open up and then close down. Your soul has access to Infinite Patience in this process and understands that it ‘takes the time that it takes’ to heal and clear the ground of your deepest densities.

These deepest densities are valued by your soul, not seen as ‘lesser’ at all, but rather a precious aspect of your journey here with Gaia. Not judged by the soul, yet rather held with curiousity and much love so that the required densities and toxicities needed to fit into a dualistic 3D world can be let go. The soul helps your 3D self unanchor from what it has needed to become attached to. Your higher heart allows this process to be held with MUCH love rather than inner battle and resistance loops that lead to suffering.

With a consistent heart and soul response from you to the deepest densities of your 3D self, it can let go of the push-pull it has known so often in your life and begin to let in LOVE more and more with less and less contraction away.

Jelelle Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.com

We offer in SoulFullHeart a process through weekly sessions with SFH facilitators for navigating this feeling, differentiating and loving of your 3D self while healing/growing your 4D transition self and embodying more and more your 5D (higher self coming into the body) self. We offer a free intro session for you to connect what you’ve been experiencing of awakening with how the process might serve you: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions.

During a livestream tomorrow, Sunday, at 11:11am CST, Raphael Awen and I will be offering an introduction to our process, the 3D self, how current cosmic energies are impacting this process and answering any questions you would like to ask us about this…I’ll be streaming it here on my feed and also on our SoulFullHeart Way Of Life feed….more info here:https://www.facebook.com/events/1273156469462294

From Heaven to Hell: The Sacred Ground Of Being Popped Into And Out Of 5D

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There has been an interesting dynamic occurring lately, where a few souls have been asking for assistance with a particular spiritual situation.  The scenario generally goes like this: A person has a huge awakening experience that comes to them seemingly out of the blue.  They have been “popped” into a conscious 5D awareness.  The visceral experiences vary, but the feeling is one of elation and bliss.  A whole new way of being in life.  And then, something happens to clunk them back into a denser frequency that feels like a hell in comparison to where they were at.  Intense reactions and thoughts get pushed up that make life almost unbearable to live after that.  I feel like this may be happening more and more, and those that are dealing with it feeling like they are alone in this “nightmare” that a part of them is experiencing. Perhaps you can relate with this too.

What is happening here? How could you be so high one minute and be so low the next without a sense of how or why? There could be a multitude of different individual reasons, but one general one that feels true is that there are woundings that are needing to be addressed that have not been resolved/healed in your emotional body.  The stay in 5D has a shelf life equivalent to what has been repressed and unfelt as traumas in your shadow.  There is a big soul drama being played out in the court of your human heart and it is asking for attention.

Now, how it got to be this way can be easily, and understandably, taken as it being done to you by someone else. You could ‘blame’ a negative entity or a teacher/healer’s etheric malpractice happening to you.  Once you have rescinded to the status of victim, you have lost your power.  So, first thing, you must take power back.  Realize that this is all being conducted by the Higher Self, not as a punishment, for love doesn’t punish, but as an opportunity to reclaim the buried and lost parts of yourself before taking off into deeper conscious territories of experience.  This is a big one to let in and be with for it grants the courage and conditions to make the next steps.

The next step is to feel how this feeling of hell is being held by a PART of you and not all of you.  It is a very scared 3D protector part that so much needs to feel someone bigger than the hell itself.  In fact, this part created the hell in order to be felt in all the traumas that still exist.  It says, “Hey, yo! You can’t just leave me here all alone! I have some things to say!” It is banking on the fact that you will give up the awakening path because it is too much for it to bear.  By feeling it as a separate part, a dialogue and relationship can form that can offer some relief.  There could be many “this life” 3D traumas that are also triggering Metasoul woundings at the same time.  It can be a spaghetti pretzel of a mess emotionally without the help of a mirror to help assist someone in untangling the knots, such as what we offer in the SoulFullHeart process.

It is important to understand that the “hell” you find yourself in is a sacred birthing ground.  It is not to be saved from or given temporary relief.  It is for a very important process.  It may even need to continue if your soul has signed up to experience something that it needs and wants to experience. In SoulFullHeart, there are no promises or guarantees that you can, or should, exit this very difficult place.  It is all an unfolding that takes much dedication and yet may still not yield the desired results if that is not what is meant to occur.

BUT, there is a process that can be had that can help to create the space from it so you can take the next steps.  I have had many “hell” experiences myself and can understand the intense emotions that are swirling inside.  However, there has to be just enough of a solid self and self-love there to create the space necessary to feel the parts inside you that are needing attention.  This is where the SoulFullHeart Process can be of service.  My heart goes out to those that are living in this intensity and hold it as a very sacred time, even though it feels scary as hell.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Intro To 3D Self Teachings And Guided Meditation (Video)

By Jelelle Awen
After offering group calls since January, 22 of them in ALL!, Raphael and I hosted our last one on Saturday. We felt to focus our energies and efforts related to serving love on sessions (including our FREE intros with Gabriel Heartman or Raphael), developing and offering our SoulFullHeart process, our books (SEVEN of them in all going to re-released in the next couple of months, plus a new one alchemizing from Raphael and I right now) and our bi-monthly livestream Q & As on Sundays here on FB and on our you tube channel too.
 
I feel a BIG thank you to all the souls who came to our group calls over the last months, and especially those who were vulnerable enough to share some of their journey and their experience with us as a group, which was usually three or four souls per group call! The group calls gave Raphael and I a platform to teach from and space to offer guided meditations from too…which was such a blessed mirror as we are finding our ‘wings’ and groundings as teachers and wayshowers. Every call seemed to go exactly as it should with those souls meant to be there showing up, getting what they needed in that moment (I trust), and the group energy creating what it could and would between us all.
 
The video/audio recording of our last group call featuring an introduction to the 3D self is above. SoulFullHeart Facilitators Gabriel and Kalayna Colibri offer their experiences and process with their 3D self and we connect what we offer in the SoulFullHeart process to this important aspect(s) of our BEing and ascension! More about what we offer in our SoulFullHeart process related to connecting with the 3D self here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions
 
We are hosting a livestream this sunday and you can ask us questions and get our responses during it. Starts at 11:11am CST (Mexico City) time and we’ll be streaming to our SFH FB page and our individual pages too, plus You Tube. Or you can watch the recording of it afterwards. More info here: https://www.facebook.com/events/1273156469462294
or here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/events
~
Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about a FREE intro session with a SoulFullHeart facilitator, group calls, videos, retreats, etc.

Spirituality And The 3D Self

by Kalayna Colibri

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The 3D self says,

“I don’t always believe in ‘god’… unless of course, it’s a literal god, one who has very black and white ways of punishing or rewarding us as humans and has given us very clear rules through people we don’t question. Sometimes I feel punished or rewarded for goodness or badness. Sometimes I don’t feel much of anything and just want to be left alone… because ultimately, I do feel alone. I don’t get a visceral sense of ‘god’ or ‘god-ness’ and I usually feel drawn to compartmentalizing god too… leaving ‘him’ to when I attend church on Sundays or at Christmas, for example. Sometimes I like retreats because they don’t challenge me to live with the spirituality every day and the 4D self can at least be sort of satiated for a while by them, or at least it can seem so. Letting in the Divine scares me because I don’t quite know or understand what that means, and I really feel mostly like it would mean losing everything I’ve built or bought or earned – relationships, career, things, etc. I don’t feel or find anything ‘spiritual’ or purposeful in the every day, and most of the time this suits me just fine… if god doesn’t bother me, I won’t bother ‘him’. Life seems like an uncontrollable thing at times, and yet totally controllable in others… or at least, I’ve convinced myself I have control when I really don’t. And if I truly let that in, I would crumble – or at least I’m afraid I would.

I live in systems made of my fears and the fears of others, that are led and maintained by the most afraid members of society. God is unknowable and unseeable, but money is and relationships are, and family is too. I can see and touch and smell material things and food that I want. I can’t see or touch who made them or harvested them or at least not often, and I don’t want to look that far into anything. I want what I want in this moment and beyond that, I don’t care. To truly be in touch with ‘god’ would mean having to see more than I do now. I don’t think I want that.

You’re born, you live, you die. I don’t think much about what happens after that. All I care about is where my next fun is coming from, in the form of food, sex, or something material that shows me I’m worth something. How does ‘god’ have a chance to enter that, and why would I want ‘him’ to?”

Sometimes, as we walk into and through different chapters of 4D awakening, where spirituality then becomes a subject fraught with questions and soul rebirth canals, we inhabit a 3D reality which is essentially ‘god-less’, at least in the sense of having a daily, visceral experience of god or the Divine in different forms and energies. You may feel yourself weaving in and out of a more 3D reality of the ‘god picture’ along the way, sometimes feeling as if life is wonder-less, and that you don’t have much sense of the Divine in your life right now. This can feel really dense and as if there is a ceiling over you and sometimes you may even have physical reactions to this reality, like intense head pain, along with some emotional reactions from parts of you to different situations in your life where things don’t seem to be going the way you or part of you wants them to. As we awaken, we begin to separate out from this ‘self’ that would rather not hold a personal sort of ‘god’ experience and also the different parts that hold this as their only possible reality. The 3D self doesn’t seem to vanish, however, though it does heal more and more and gradually integrates into our daily reality and our being in a different way. Our 3D self represents ‘this-life’ wounds and pain, though it may not always feel that consciously or if it does, it may seek therapy or some form of self-help that won’t ultimately reach the deepest aspects of what needs to heal. It needs us, inside of our 4D or 5D selves, to help bridge it to something deeper and actually be with it there too, not trying to suppress or abandon it, which we can’t really do anyways.

The 3D self can sometimes make itself hard to love. It has a way in which it has built formidable walls and can feel unreachable in the sense of feeling it deeply beyond a surface-level sense of success, failure, loss, gain, happiness at getting what it wants, sadness when it doesn’t. It very seldom holds a deep compassion towards itself or others. This may not be true of all 3D selves, but for most of them, this feels like what needs to be felt, held and reconciled within each.

Ascension, in my sense of it, means inviting the 3D self to come along, loving it the whole way. This love can’t be false because this ‘self’ won’t buy it if it is, or might pretend to for a time but in the end, it won’t be deeply moved by anything you offer it. It is so often an energy of protective disbelief. Loving it begins with feeling one part of you at a time, and feeling your way into the love that wants to flow into and through you and wrap around it too. From this place, comes our deepest, purest sense of spirituality, which has always been there somehow, though the days and moments come when we feel it has left us or isn’t accessible. These phases are as much a part of our journey as the highest heights are, and every bit as sacred.

To learn more about working with and healing your 3D self, you can visit our website, http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions for a sense of how we hold the process and what the SoulFullHeart process is in and of itself. ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.