By Kalayna Colibri
I don’t know how deeply I have ever truly appreciated the journey of loving your fear until now. It’s a whole other layer of awakening when we can get to this place of realizing that it even IS a journey… and of course it is… look at the intensity of what happens as we awaken into lower 4D frequencies specifically, where we start to feel and even experience the pain of the collective and ourselves too on a whole other bandwith… that alone is a lot to wade through and it can feel like learning to walk all over again to find our way into digestion and integration of these realizations and awakenings. Feeling and loving our fears is all part of the package in order to truly ascend past this stage.
As ironic as it may sound, it feels like one of our deepest lessons is surrendering into feeling our fears and not just “dealing” with them in order to “ascend”. Until we can really feel the fear, we can’t understand its reasons for being there and the parts of us that have truly held it as their dominant reality… and therefore, it doesn’t get truly transmuted and healed, just paved over, coped with, ignored, until we can no longer ignore it.
For me, there has been so much fear around self-image, around becoming invisible, about never feeling like I (or parts of me) are truly powerful in the way they and I most want to be… it becomes a process of feeling the fear that this is just always going to be true. That this reality is all that’s real. What I’m discovering though is that it’s the dropping of the veil around my fears that helps me feel how I have all the power I need in order to be with them and love them like there’s no tomorrow… and, feel the power there is in the surrender to just simply feeling and also letting go of or taking space from whatever/whoever necessary in order for the fears and anxieties to just take centre stage in my inner world until they can feel all the love they need to feel to start feeling something different.
As I briefly journaled before bed last night, I shared with a beloved guide of mine that I feel afraid of “going backwards” in my process, which really is a complicated fear actually, as there are a number of things wrapped up in this for me and parts of me. She offered simply that there is no “going backwards” and that this is actually too linear of a way to think about process. Instead, she offered that I can think of it as “going INward”.
I feel this as an aspect of my personal process right now yet felt to share it too, as I can feel an important reframe of the ways in which many of us may feel about process and moving through life. There really are no “setbacks”, just new journeys and chances to regroup and reboot, maybe also reevaluate the current course too. These phases are true gifts that help us all feel where we are most authentically at and who we would most like to become on the other side of the tougher inner spaces and processes.❤️
My beloveds offer powerful, illuminating (and so affordable) space holding and facilitation if you’d like some support on your own journey through these themes and more… more info here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions ❤️
Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart co-founder, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.