Tag: consciousness

By Raphael Awen

The only place any real growth can occur is in the gap between what you have and what you desire to have; the gap between where you and where you desire to be.

If you don’t desire anything more than what you have, in whatever area of your life, you are at present satiated, or fully satisfied.

As proverbs says: ‘a full soul loathes a honeycomb’.

Returning to growth will require the courage to re-own your appetite, especially if a part of you worked so hard to get it suppressed to where you did.

Returning to your quest will call upon your deepest QUESTions, and dusting off the clutter and clamour of the answers that once soothed, but now only block the very oxygen your heart and soul is aching for.

Entire spiritual practices, belief systems, social circles and ways of doing life will most likely need to be renegotiated with and very often completely let go of in the process of returning to desire.

Most often, when we set out to kill desire, we subconsciously set up huge infrastructure in our lives to support that suppression. We co-sign mutual contracts with others who are at this same phase as us that we are now going to have to renege on, and begin in earnest to dismantle.

Desire cannot be killed. It is pure life energy itself, that can morph and change, but never cease to exist. Even the phase of suppressing desire is part of desire’s dance of helping you come to new terms with it.

You may have lost touch with desire, but desire has not lost touch with you.

Try writing it a letter. Begin with something like ‘Dear Desire, Where have you gone in my life? What have parts of me tried to do to you? What is it you are really wanting? How could we find each other again? Love, Me.’ Then wait for a response and write that out. Allow for a penpal back and forth as need be.

Desire itself will rekindle in you in a powerful way if you are ready to trust the process.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

By Raphael Awen

Opting for the Heaven you don’t know, over the Hell that you do know, will call upon everything in you.

Deep in our essence, we know love in the profoundest sense, yet we struggle to feel it and know it in an everyday sense. We are love. We are heaven. But we took a forgetful journey to the far away land of love’s lack in order to grow into more of love’s ever expanding infinity.

This is where you find yourself now, feeling far away from love, yet actually BEing this love, while feeling the parts of yourself and others that are not yet reconciled to this love that we all are.

You are love, yet you experience hell.

The craziness of this will constantly incline you to attempt to make many temporary and false heavens out of the hell you are actually in. When you live in the forest, you make your house out of wood.

If you want to get to know more of the real heaven that you don’t yet know in your everyday experience, you are going to have to spend some of that bank account that you are holding onto of the hell you do know.

The hell you know is the currency that will buy you the heaven you don’t know, what you really want, if you are willing to spend it.

This will require admitting that the hell you are in, is in fact a hell; that you are willing to leave it; and that you want help to find your way out. If that isn’t true for you yet, you simply aren’t done with your sacred chosen hell and what the time there is meant to bring you.

This will also require that you are willing to authorize a resource(s) that you recognize as being part of your emerging heaven to assist you, guide you…that they represent your higher self, your heaven, in physical form, a projection and manifestation of this future you.

This will require feeling the painful gap between where you are now and where you long to be, and all that this gap is meant to alchemize in you.

If you are at this place, you have entered the place of true adventure, where the first step is actually as grand as the last step, as they are all steps on the same sacred journey, where none is more meaningful than any other.

If you feel like you are not at this place, see if this feels like you, or instead a part of you, and then see if you are ready to show up for this part of you and the hell they find themselves in.

 
Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

By Raphael Awen

Every last one of us has been deeply enculturated.

We’re left with taking responsibility for the cults we find ourselves in.

The first cult we were subjected to, seemingly by our own choice, was the cult of ‘the individuated out from divine source’. This cult left us with a kind of bi-polar disorder of on one hand fearing being returned to source against our will and having our individuality taken from us, and on the other hand, fearing not being able to ever find our way back to oneness source, left in a hell of separation and individuation forever.

Talk about having all the bells and whistles of having been in what feels like a harmful cult! Our hangups, anger, hatred and dysfunctions suddenly make a lot of sense. Could anything be more painful than losing your awareness of your true identity, leaving you and I out begging life for any kind of substitute scraps of survival forms of love that can be had?

Eventually, as we come to take responsibility for this first cult and the many other cults that we’ve wandered into and find ourselves in, we come to discover that while it most deeply feels like we are separate and separated, we never actually were. We come to see that we are in fact as close as we ever can and will be, and all that is awakening is only a realization of what IS, and not any kind of attainment of anything that isn’t already.

We are left with the task of attaining what already is.

We need all the dramas of life and relationship as the story and culture setting to get us to the moral of the story which is LOVE, not as an injunction to dutifully ‘be more loving’, but as a dawning awareness of the essence of what you and I already are and always were, leading to just simply and truly being the love that we are. The only injunction we’re really left with is ‘just be yourself’.

The deeper awareness in all of this that WE CHOSE this as the soul beings we are, calls us to feel all there is to feel in reaction to our present awakening. Only now can we begin to feel these roots of all of our dysfunctions and querks both related to being human, as well as related to being birthed into being a soul. Only now can we begin to feel and take responsibility for our true awesome power.

It’s like we’ve travelled to a far country, with strange language, weird food, and customs. We don’t know how to be here and we don’t know where to find what we desire as familiar love. When we do find something that feels familiar, that feels like family, we often find that the comfort it once gave no longer does. Our deep inborn hunger for love calls us on to seek new forms and experiences of the love that we are. We find ourselves again invited into new forms of cult and culture, given our bents for attachment and our needs for love. Now, we can take conscious responsibility for what we choose and for what we most deeply want; a new culture of love.

We didn’t come here for any kind of instant fix. You were never broken in fact. If anything, you were fixed in love and wanted to unfix yourself being the explorer of the infinite love that you are. You and I came here having it all and we couldn’t help ourselves but to want more. We came here for a process. We came here for relationships. We came here to feel and heal all there is to feel.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.