Digesting Disclosure: Love, Shadow, & Disclosure

In this episode of Digesting Disclosure, Raphael and Gabriel talk about the deeper shadow that lurks in the disclosure world and how we are meant to feel how our reactions to it reflect our own relationship to exploring the Shadow within ourselves. If Love is the source of All then how does that reconcile with all the evil practices that are waiting to be exposed on a greater scale?

This is meant to get to a wider context of deeper feeling and exploration for each of us individually and as a collective. An upcoming meditation in our next episode will help to begin this connection within to help bridge to this suppressed and hidden part of each of us. With Love by our side, we can offer something new into the space in our rage and/or despair.

Here is a past guided mediation to meet your shadow self previously created by Jelelle Awen. https://youtu.be/4VnfgzhzzjE

For more information on SoulFullHeart Bridging Sessions visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

The Velveteen Rabbit Within Us All

Digesting a lot in the aftermath of completion. My heart and consciousness still calibrating to a new reality post-marriage. There are ghost-like sensations throughout the day, things that I would normally have responded to are no longer there. It is a bit of a emotive and cognitive dissonance yet that is the very thing that lands me back into me.

Me.

Who is that even? I am beginning to become aware of who I was and which parts of me were in response to all of the relationship dynamics. I do feel a core self that has been there but the degree to which “he” showed up is still in question. That is the current process. Taking stock of where “I” was and who this “I” even is.

It is not so much existential or judgmental as it is curious with compassion. That is what allows the shadow to come out and be seen and felt. Just hanging outside the cave entrance and letting it know that I am here to be a friend and a caring advocate. Not a punisher or a hunter looking for extradition.

When we go through emotional times like this it can be so easy for a part of us to go into “fix it” mode or into the blame/shame game. Instead there is an opportunity here for us to get to some tender and profound understandings of what make us who we ARE and who we want to be going forward. This makes all our experiences sacred and meaningful. We get to come in contact with aspects of ourselves that are deep need of love and forgiveness.

Through this experience I will find something that may not look “good” or feel good, but if my Higher Heart is leading the way I can guarantee I will find something that will be real and that is what any of us can hope to aspire to. Just ask the Velveteen Rabbit.

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INtimacy over INvisibility

By Raianna Shai

I haven’t written a post in a while as a lot has been shifting and growing in my world. A couple of weeks ago Kalayna and I spent a few days on Salt Spring and just this week we all spent time camping in Goldstream.

One theme that has been popping up a lot for myself as well as my entire community is intimacy in relationships. I have always had this tendency and even desire inside of me to be invisible. I was incredibly shy as a child, I never rose my hand in class, I chose to blend in for any social interaction. I had absolutely no desire to be seen or more vulnerably, to be judged by others.

It’s easy to get into a “mode” in every relationship in your life and it doesn’t take long to establish, even with new people. We find what frequency is most comfortable and what allows us to get along with this other person. What gets hard is when something gets triggered or rubs against something inside of us.

I have found that most people either push away their reactions towards others, judging them as unfair or just not worth it, or they push their reactions on others, without feeling what the impact might be or what’s going on inside of them. Both of these strategies allow us to hide, to put away the deeper and more vulnerable parts of us that go against the already agreed upon frequency that you have established in the relationship.

Parts of me fear that my truth will either end the relationship or deepen it. Both risking being seen for more than my persona. Going against the grain of what is comfortable in relationship is exactly what intimacy is all about.

You tell your truth, as messy as it gets, until one day you are transparent in every moment. Until you have no fear locking you into place and all of your words come from love for yourself and love for other. Until you trust that losing a relationship is okay and deepening a relationship is okay too. Until you are so centred inside of yourself that no level of intimacy can scare you away. Even when fear comes up there is progress and honesty about it all. That is when community can flourish and become something new and never done before.

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, community, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Healing Heartbreak Guided Meditation: ‘Discover’ Vlog Series With Kalayna Solais

By Kalayna Solais

I decided to create a video about healing heartbreak through parts work/the SoulFullHeart process, highlighting how it has been helping me and offering a guided meditation to help you connect to the part of you that is the most heartbroken right now (if you’re going through your own mourning process). I share openly though not in great detail yet (I’ll do more of that in another video and in some future blogs, I think) about what I’ve been processing around my recent completion of a Sacred Union romance.

I focus more on the healing of heartbreak when a relationship completes, yet this meditation can apply if a beloved in your life has passed. It’s all about connecting within and letting in the support and LOVE you’re surrounded by through guides, the Divine, your Higher Self, and even life and love themselves in order to move through the pain in all of its many layers and waves.

There are SO many dynamics moving inside of you at all times and it does sometimes take phases of big life changes in order to stir the pot and help you deeply feel what’s been going on this whole time. I’ve found it so helpful and empowering to take everything I’ve been moving through in my life back inward to process it all with parts of me… even and especially when this feels challenging to do or take space to do.

With much love,

Kalayna Solais

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Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Being In My Personal ‘Intertidal Zone’

By Kalayna Solais

Spending some time with myself and my parts today, taking in the ocean and sunshine from Father Sun, walking amongst the trees, looking for owls (didn’t see one today but now I know where I can find them!), and just BEing… it’s been a ride this past month, what with the completion with Gabriel and becoming another ‘year’ older, which in this case feels like a year of deep rebirth that is only just beginning as so many phases inside of me seem to be ending.

We celebrated my ‘birthday’ last night as a community, making a delicious vegan dinner together and enjoying the time spent even though it’s understandably bittersweet for Gabriel and me at this time. I received gifts I did NOT expect even though part of me has been VERY vocal about wanting a few things lately, especially a new glass water bottle with a rose quartz in it to charge the water, and a big, beautiful tapestry that I can’t wait to find a home for as I settle into the room Gabriel will be vacating when he moves out at the end of the month.

Yeah… bittersweet. Goodness and sadness. Letting in and letting go.

Sometimes it feels as if I’m living like a starfish in an intertidal zone. Learning to breathe and live with the waves, the grief, the openings within and with others, the feeling of ALL possibilities in ALL areas of my life that seem to be offering new doors to open and walk through…

Well, isn’t this what’s true for all of us as Ascension waves move through, ignite us and activate us, then invite us to take space to integrate, to feel, to re-orient back inside after a phase of serving or grounding on the outside? Sometimes parts of you may feel a bit dried out by having to find a way through another layer of 3D conditioning or even 4D growing pains. Sometimes you may feel drenched by tidal waves of LOVE pouring in in ways you weren’t expecting or maybe even ready for. It’s all a part of the birth contractions of the NEW… what we came here to embody and inhabit on a deep level inside of us and with each other.

With much LOVE from my awakening and healing heart-space to yours… ❤

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Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Secret: Feel The Parts, THEN Manifest

By Raianna Shai

**TLDR; I’m starting a project of reading all of the most popular spiritual books that I hear of to learn about what others are taking in so that I can share my own personal take on them. In “The Secret” I resonate with the idea of manifestation and our capacity to draw whatever it is we want. However, I believe that you have to feel the blocks that are in the way and the parts of you that don’t feel your power. They have very good reasons to feel this way and shouldn’t be bypassed in this process.**

I grew up in a spiritual household for a good portion of my life. The sweet scent of incense, the soothing sound of meditation music, a mother and step father that would talk about their spiritual and emotional explorations. But to be honest, I wasn’t all that into is as something to deeply explore myself as a teenager.

By the time I chose to try SoulFullHeart with my family I still hadn’t had a phase of spiritual exploration that most young people have when newly awakening. Because of this I really just have the SoulFullHeart lens that, while it resonates on every level so far, isn’t something that most people know about. Especially people my own age.

So I decided that in order to truly understand spiritual people my age, I could start by reading the most popular books from the classics to the more modern takes on spirituality. I really want to dive into the heart of someone who has a buffet of spiritual beliefs to dive into and figure out how I feel about it myself. So the next time someone brings up “The Power of Now”, I can have something to digest about it.

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The first book I’ve chosen to dive into is “The Secret”. I first saw this documentary on Netflix and tried to watch but couldn’t quite get into it. It felt a bit dramatic to be honest and it energized this feeling that this is something that has been taken away from us to remove our power and make us feel like we can’t change every fiber of our daily lives. I do agree that there is a veil in place that stands in the way of the ultimate capacity of our beings, but I also feel that we chose this and that a big part of why we’re here is to heal enough to dissolve this veil.

For those of you who haven’t read this book, the secret they are referencing is the Law of Attraction. It says that like attracts like – which means that whatever you think is attracted to you. If you think that you are poor, you will be. If you think that you are rich, you will be.

My first reaction from a part of me was that this seems very oversimplified. I feel that we have chosen certain circumstances and while we have the choice to heal them or not, some things are just meant to happen whether we think high vibe thoughts or not.

However, I do resonate with the idea that once we find our absolute joy and become more of our higher selves we will draw and manifest just about anything we want to. I definitely believe in the power of intention and the energy of the universe. I also really like that it encourages you to have gratitude for what you have NOW as a part of it all. Gratitude is such an important part of manifesting something new. Where my feelings differ though are how to get there.

“The Secret” mentions a lot about replacing negative thoughts with positive ones. While that’s a nice sentiment I think it takes something different and some hard inner work for everyone to get to this positive and joyful place. For me, it is parts work and the process we do in SoulFullHeart. For someone else it might be breathwork or shamanism. I feel that if you can get deep enough inside of yourself to reach the parts of you that don’t believe in your power or joy, then it is a fast track to feeling exactly that.

I think it’s a very empowering and expanding practice to picture and energize exactly what you want in your life. It sends a message out to the universe and it will manifest for you. Not thinking of the how or when but knowing that you can have it. But it’s also empowering to feel the parts of you that just don’t believe, that feel like they’ll never get what they want. Without first feeling your blocks to manifestation with love and trust, you will have a harder time manifesting anything. These parts have valid reasons for feeling the way they do and I really don’t believe they should be bypassed.

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, community, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Feeling & Being Felt Clears The Way To Your New Reality

By Kalayna Solais

The heart space clears as tears fill the chambers that were once closed off and sealed.

Sometimes giving yourself space to cry, to just let out what’s been pent up or buried for so long, is the deepest gift.

Frustrations need space to come out from parts of you who feel they’ve been used and neglected, who’ve needed to be incredibly walled-off and protected from a world that has seemed quite heartless and cruel in their experience of it.

To be able to trust another with these tears as they hold space for you to have them is powerful… to be felt deeply and tenderly by another who is qualified to hold this space by their capacity to hold space for themselves and who hold a NEW legacy from their own space-holders who have felt them deeply too.

It can take a long time to trust this shared heart space and there are so many very good reasons why this has been true.

The new sense of what it means to be empathic and to feel another, walking with them on their way to healing as they become more and more empowered to hold that space for themselves too… and eventually others… this is what makes the journey of refining who you are as a ‘healer’ in this world worth it and the journey of serving love that constantly challenges you to keep serving and receiving love from yourself, from the Divine, to yourself, worth it.

I’ve been moved so many times by those I’ve held space for and it always helps me find movements within too. To me, the part of serving love that fills me up the most is to hold and offer the energies I give myself and also receive from those I love and trust. Feeling the love move through and from me to someone in a session, helping their cup fill back up again, is not only rewarding but always clears my heart space out too, making room for me to feel whatever is next for me to feel for myself and my own parts/Metasoul.

And so is the new INvitation to heart-led, vulnerable leadership and healership too… so is the journey into 5D/Golden Earth reality. Though the road can seem long and winding, we ARE in this together, and we are moving upward with every sober yet alive step inward…

And every vulnerable, aching tear our parts are willing to feel as what hasn’t been that reality moves more and more out of our fields and current reality.

~

I would love to serve you in session space if what I’m describing resonates for you! My beloveds are available as well… http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

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Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Eclipse Brings Stillness And Activation

By Gabriel Solais

The Sun activates. He penetrates. He gets us outside and into movement. We are showered with his powerful codes. This can be a lot to let in. We may feel over-saturated with these sacred Love streams.

The Moon offers us a reprieve. A moment of stillness and reflection. An opportunity to play “catch up” with our selves. Our scattered pieces that are waiting to be picked up and brought back to wholeness. She gives us the space to integrate and see things with more clarity. She invites us to walk into the Next with a more grounded footing, rather than feeling like we are stumbling at times.

This is gift the Eclipse can offer us today. We can choose something new to step into. Let go of the things that no longer serve the longer term arch of our higher timeline and the Presence of this Now. It is a galactically fleeting moment but a profound one if we choose it to be.

Set your intentions, desires, and dreams on High today. Offer them up to the Galactic Dance and see what comes on its way back to your heart, body, and soul.

 

Gabriel Solais is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

The Constant Of Change

By Gabriel Solais

Change is the one thing that we can count on to be constant. That is the marker of our growth whether that change shifts something inside of us, outside, or both. Invariably they are both occurring simultaneously. The deeper gauge is how we are relating to and digesting that change inside.

My world has felt like it has flipped on its axis over the past couple of weeks. I will be writing more about that in the next couple of days. In this emotional ‘pole shift’ a lot has rumbled and it could feel like a catastrophe to parts of me. Kind of like my own personal Atlantis.

In the course of this upheaval, I have given myself to the surges and purges. The depths of feeling that bring rain and then clearer skies, only to roll with another ‘aftershock’ of reality. I have had the fortunate situation to be able to do so at a rate and pace that felt self-loving and not forced, judged, or ignored.

In the roll, I am finding a rock. A sense of BEing that is not hard, but fluid and flexible. Trusting and forgivable. This rock is a deeper layer of a ‘me’ that I continue to learn about and become more intimate with in Love and Awareness. Some good and some things that need to be loved.

And that is the gift of this journey. To find what is True within the Hidden, even when that seems to get flipped upside down from time to time. The essence and purpose of change. If you are amidst a great shift and change in your life there are those that can help you to navigate that with all the grace and pace needed to get to that ‘other side’ and next chapter. It has been a gift to me beyond these words.

More to come…

Gabriel Solais is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Vulnerability In Relationship

By Raianna Shai

I wrote this poem after having just the right day to open up my heart. Whenever this happens every space inside of me that feels like a void fills up with gratitude and appreciation of my environment and the people around me. I was reminded of why I tend to feel guarded around others and how good it feels to be intimate in relationship.

I am very good at being alone. I have always been independent and able to entertain myself quite easily. I thought recently that I would be happier and more opened out living on my own. But the fact that living with others is harder and scarier means it’s probably what I’m meant to be working.

I was feeling how it’s so easy to feel misunderstood or judged by others when you have that living inside of yourself. Whenever my insecurity was high, I found that it was harder to let others in and be vulnerable. I also remembered how much I love physical touch and how important it is to increase the intimacy in relationships. A lingering hug here, a friendly cuddle there. I always saved this for when I was in a romantic relationship because that’s where it felt safe and accepted.

But telling someone what they mean to you and showing physical affection are two things that are bound to be scary. It means you are seeing the other and therefore “risk” being seen yourself. This can bring up a lot of fear if a sense of lack or unworthiness lives inside of you.

I have a big desire to go to the next place in all of my relationships in order to work this push pull inside of me when it comes to intimacy. This poem illustrates the feeling I had of that!

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In the moments that my heart splits open
Gratitude fills every atom of my soul
My body sways with tenderness and care
I want to wrap my arms around every lonely heart
Connecting to oneness and collective love

My fingers trace the edges of my frame
It runs along every crack
Every bump
Every inconsistency
It fills my emptiness with loving energy
It brings out the softness underneath the surface

Soft vulnerability is hard to show
The sweet caress of your own beauty
Uniquely separate from those around you
Yet intertwined in insecurity and fear

I feel overwhelmed by the thought of my loved ones
The way they move through life
The way they see and care for me
When I can’t see myself

You are so brave, dear one
To be a bright green growth
In a grey sidewalk crack
Constantly fearing the underside of passing steps
The shadow side of humanity

I see you, I feel you
I want you, I need you
I feel scared to tell you
That I admire you
And hope you admire me too

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, community, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.