Tag: parts work

You Are The Love Magma Of New Earth

Published on by Gabriel Heartman2 Comments

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Shifts and rumbles.  All making way for what is wanting to move from a deeper layer of your being into the light of day.  Into a more outed, genuine, and expressed version of what you have come to “know” yourself as.  That “you” that you didn’t realize was a place holder for the more real you.  But how were you to know? Even the “me” that is typing this is not the most authentic version of me.  It is an ongoing process that takes desire, curiosity, and whole lot of courage, for there are things that are not what we may want to see or feel along the way.

That is the awakening. The remembering from the deep sleep of our journey into this dimension.  The feeling of the protection and falseness that we have been used to identifying as “the good guy”, “the one who has it all together”, “the healer”, or any other labels a part of us have been using to make our way through this life….until it just doesn’t hold water anymore.  The soul is aching to come out into the light and like magma from the depths of the earth, lots of stuff gets shaken up.  Sacred goo among the cracks.

It is only your desire for real love and the essence of your true creative power that keeps these heart and soul tectonics in continuous motion.  There is no guarantee that life will look and feel like it did a year, a month, or even a week ago.  If it does then you can be assured that there is a part of you that is resisting this awakening and maturation process, and that it has its damn good reasons! What feels the same to you inside yourself from a year ago? With sincere reflection you can feel what still lies at the core of what needs your love.

For me it has been the way a part of me relates to change, abundance, and love.  It comes out in physical manifestations that block fully letting in due to a focus on the issue itself. I find myself in the midst of major changes in my body, new timelines, and relationship. It is intensified by the new altitude of energies we find ourselves in.  To truly let go and let in I am feeling Metasoul lives and their relationship to it all.  The inner parts of me that can really no longer survive in this new environment.  I am heading into new waters of romance, soul expression, and service leadership. What a time to be alive! Healing what once was and moving into new territory of divine MEness.  This is hot stuff!  I have things to do, see, and be!

I feel this for you too. To keep feeling what lies underneath your tectonic plates and what wants to arise new and shower itself upon your world for all to experience and learn from. You are hot stuff waiting to be birthed into the New Earth atmosphere! The plates are the parts and aspects of us that have been formed to keep us safe in response to all that our souls have been through.  Love is what sets them into rumble and eventual collapse when held in the cauldron of your sacred heart.  They all become an integrated part of the new.  New abundance, new timelines, new community, new relationships.

It all starts inside with that fire of desire.  Ask it what it truly wants and the rumble begins…..

 

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

 

Your Deepest Joys Include Your Deepest Sorrows

Published on by Raphael Awen1 Comment

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By Raphael Awen

If part of your definition of awakening does not include feeling how unhappy parts of you actually are, you’re not ready to awaken. You may be working your way there, but you’re not there yet.

You’re ready to go find your next drug high that is about staying asleep to what is while pretending to yourself and others around you that that isn’t so. There’s plenty others still there and so there is company and joint victimhood to be had if that is what your soul is still needing in its chosen learning curve.

The cutting edge of the whole cosmos however is a groaning in birth pang travail for the awakening of true desire, for ongoing deep journey into change and a fuller fullness into the infinite love that we all are. If you can’t come to terms with the risk involved and admitting what you really feel, what you ache for, you are very much still in the spectator seats watching life pass you by. Life at its core is unsatisfied, while it also knows the deepest satisfaction there is. Both are true. They go together and can’t actually be separated.

Your deepest joys include your deepest sorrows. This is the place where you truly come alive, and find the grace to let go of the pretend spiritualities and polite culture that has you in its servitude, to cover for what your heart and soul truly misses.

What would it take to get you to sign up for something more? What QUESTions do you have that if they were truly addressed in your life, would make it so you can no longer say ‘no’? What love and curiosity could you bring to the parts of you who are not on board yet with your readiness and ache to choose something so much more?

I speak these words as much to myself as I speak them to you. They are a waveform vibration of awakening that are offered to stir something loose in you and I, that has been wanting and is now nearing a deeper return to life and divine play. We breathe in, we breathe out.

I’m out to find more of my tribe, and to be me in that tribe. It might sound noble, and actually be noble for that matter, but it’s actually perfectly selfish at the same time! There is no difference actually between what you most deeply want and your greatest gifts to the universe are. It’s time to move that word ‘selfish’ over to the benevolent side of your lexicon.

I know something about you because I know it about myself. I don’t need any special clairvoyance per se to see it. I can see that you have in your awareness a sense of a next step on your truer path before you. It could be a long overdue epic life change that is stinking up your kitchen big time, or it could be something seemingly tiny, but yet a momentous change in your heart and soul’s relationship to life. That step, that choice is your portal to more and when you choose it, you light up the radar panel in the soularium and your tribe hones in on you and you on them.

It’s really that easy…once you do the hard part of finding the willingness to feel all there is to feel inside of you.

You might want to go shopping for a new pair of something because you are about to take a trip, to a new place that you’ve actually been in long waiting for.

It might be a journey into the heart of SoulFullHeart, and to us here. We’ve been building a while now and ‘they’ are coming. And it’s freakin’ exciting, and it will rock your world as you know it to check into really going deeper with us. We have clear intentions and clear boundaries about what that’s about to make it as deep a life giving experience for everyone drawn. Is it you? I’d love to hear from you if it is.

Raphael Awen
soulfullheartwayoflife.com/services

You can join us this coming weekend for a group call which is a great way to take in our energies another notch and participate if you want to, listen in if you want to and then see what’s true after that. Details here:soulfullheartwayoflife.com/groupcalls

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Feeling Our Way To Rose-Colored Glasses

Published on by Gabriel Heartman2 Comments

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“You are invited to feel. Invited to let IN. Invited to choose. You cannot be convinced or forced into anything your soul hasn’t already chosen as its learning ground. It is all created by you for you. Your own special remembrance program. All the difficulties, challenges, pain, fear, anxieties, terrors, pleasures, glories, and accomplishments, et al. They have been placed before you to as a reminder of what you needed to bring love to in order to feel the love of.”

Not sure where these words are coming from. They are there for me to take in. Maybe meant for you as well. I am feeling a part of me today that is wanting to let go of an old way of relating to life and self. Seeing and feeling things through a weathered and worn out pair of fear glasses and ready to adorn those rose-colored ones that we all want to wear but were told they didn’t see the world “realistically”.

I clearly needed these 3D glasses. And you did too. They got me to realize how much more I want to inhabit and feel about this life I chose to live and create. They are like the old worn out pair of jeans that you just could see yourself getting rid of because they felt so comfortable and reliable. But they just aren’t me anymore. It is time for something new. Something bigger that comes from withIN. A choice to feel the reactions to that come up from response to that bigger, to that experience of life and love that feels so elusive to a part of me. This is an unfolding and unfurling. With each healed layer there comes a new one to feel at greater depths of wanting more love, more authentic expression.

Maybe this is you too. Tired and worn out. Ready to move on and move UP. To feel the part of you that is ready to surrender the guard, the fight, and the struggle. To lean into a fuller brighter you that this part of you sees as just a pair of those rose-colored glasses. It is not as simple as replacing the old ones. That is not how it works. It is about feeling all the ways in which we have kept ourselves from letting go of the old ones and feeling worthy enough to adorn the new ones. The ones we know are way more realistic, and way more magical!

We are approaching a time when we are all going to start feeling this more and more. This inner passion and truth that will seek out its own way to find its birth and requisite death. Yet we get to choose how this unfolds every step of the way.

I have chosen to lead myself and others through this magical portal called SoulFullHeart. It is what I came here to be a part of and experience. It is what brings me to more and more of an expanded sense of self, of Love, of community, and of a glorious new Golden Earth. It is here for you to choose as well when you feel ready and resonant.

Here’s to those rose-colored glasses and to what we have always meant to experience beyond what we have been willing to feel.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

You Can’t Steer A Parked Car

Published on by Raphael Awen2 Comments

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By Raphael Awen

The reason your next steps may not feel so clear is that a part of you has been resisting the natural movement, the flow, the direction.

An all too common way parts of us do this is to focus on the ‘impossibility’ of the big step as a way to not take any small steps. Big steps are just a series of small steps.

You can’t steer a parked car and a parked car cannot take you anywhere.

The small steps are crucial to confirming guidance, building trust and being en-couraged to take the next steps. Big movements are always a process, rather than an epic end-of-life-as-you-know-it, mammoth, swallow-you-whole kind of choice that a part of you may be amping it up to be.

If life is in fact facing you with a life or death kind of choice, I venture to say that that is what a part of you has created by resisting the many small choice points along the way. Life never gives you what you cannot bear, but the opposite can sure seem true when we haven’t been paying attention. Parts of us then can play victim to life and change in a seemingly all-too-real reality, hiding the fact we created that reality.

A decision to leave a partner or a marriage shouldn’t be what stops you from beginning to bring your truth, both to yourself and to your mate. Start there and see where that leads. What changes can you embrace in your career while feeling and not denying the desire to leave that career?

Life at its core is about change. Trying to be in life with a resistive relationship with change is like trying to stop the wind. You can resist change, but you only end up resisting yourself and where change wants to take you.

When you don’t change, you become more and more uninteresting to yourself, others and even to life itself too. You are contributing less to the community you are a part of and so naturally you feel less safe and less trusting that life will reciprocate and meet your needs. Your anxiety becomes palpable and obnoxious as you demand that others look after the fallout of your resistance to life, and the dis-ease that you are manifesting around you and in you.

If you are allowing me to speak this straight to you today, I can feel that it is because you really do want to take responsibility to change your relationship to change, and return to actually being in life.

You bring huge air into the room when you do that. You water the souls of everyone around you, which includes all of us, because we are all connected and we are all one as well as individuals at the same time.

Talk about a high spiritual calling, like no other, just living your life, to the fullest!

I felt a need to speak this straight today as I am gathering my own courage again for my next steps, and I so want to be around, up close and personal with this kind of very exciting life giving energy.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Energies Invite Us Into A New Kind Of ‘Strength’ From Within

Published on by Kasha Rosa7 Comments

by Kalayna Colibri

Alessandro Sanna

Painting by Alessandro Sanna

Our self-doubts run deep within a river of rejection fears and wounds. This river rises more and more as these energies swirling around us come in to shake it up, bring it up, flush it out. Having days that feel like everything inside of you is against you is part of this process… there are parts of you that want you to feel them, finally, in their turmoil. They want to be loved in spite of their spiky armor and seen for more than just the pain they hold. They want you to show up for them, to show them that they have worth so that in your very being, you can feel this worth deeply, inhabit it, live by it, and never compromise it again. So much inside of you wants and aches for your advocacy from you to you, to stop the madness for each part of you and Metasoul aspect too.

The image of the ‘Heart Warrior’ is another superhero that parts of you want to lean into, yet it too is an archetype of invulnerability that pushes away love. Yes, there is a ‘hero’ inside of you that shows up somehow to feel YOU for the first time in the form of these precious parts of your being, heart, and soul, and yet the famed ferocity is for naught. It is only a picture of what is needed to cut through the din within, but not the sword of love. Love needs no sword. Love comes in anyway, sneaks under your fence posts, doesn’t need to shield itself and certainly doesn’t need a weapon. Love will win the wrestling match, even though parts of you try to prolong it for years, decades, centuries on end, pushing aside its mirrors, following only the habitual flow back into patterns of old that have yet to bring you the joy and fulfillment you’ve wanted.

There wouldn’t be a way to feel all there is to feel without a strengthening happening within – an energy that cannot be broken by any outside force and eventually no inside one either. It is a way to feel that all you’re feeling does have purpose and that the gauntlet you’re walking out is the training ground you need. This is a strong metaphor, yes, because this is what it feels like to truly be in process in these moments where so much is surfacing. It feels as tough as it is, as it has had to be. Parts of you have built walls to keep the flood waters of feeling out, yet here they are blowing apart your inner dams and bringing you to a new surface above it all where none of it is transcended, yet held, owned, taken responsibility for, and healed over different phases of life.

We are not only being cleared out by Ascension energies, but we are being strengthened, toned, given new legs to stand on too. What is moving needs to be replaced, not only by crystalline cells but also by a new stance, a brand new way of standing with a strength that doesn’t need battles to prove itself, only a continual advocacy for and with love. It’s an ongoing invitation to no longer seek and find reasons to go to war,  yet to feel and love the parts of you that want to and have become very good at it over the years.

It’s time to flow into the inner rivers of pain and wounding, to find yourself on a new shore, renewed and more alive than ever before. To let it all surface takes more strength than burying it and you can so trust that it’s all leading you somewhere safer, LOVElier, better.

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Can You Come Out To Play?

Published on by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

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By Raphael Awen

What would it take for you to come out and play again?

I know deep down, you really want to. But something has you to itself right now.

Is it a sadness that the joys you once had so much fun with are gone now?… And you don’t know how you could ever have that much fun again?

Or is it that you can’t see who would want to be with you and have your kind of fun?

I’m not trying to figure you out. You’re way too big of a being to be figured out. I just want you to come out to play again when you are ready to.

I do feel something for you, if you’d let me share it with you?

I can feel that life as you once knew it changed somehow, and you knew some really cool joys in that old life, but that life dried up and went away. You found something really, really cool, and now it’s gone. Now, you’re sad, and that’s okay.

I think I know something else too that I’d like to share with you if you’d let me. And that is that when people lose things like you lost, they don’t actually let themselves feel what they lost and how sad they actually are. They keep their tears inside. I did that for a long time. It’s like we don’t arrange and attend the funeral. I think I know something too about why we tend to do that, that it is about how we are afraid the tears will swallow us somehow, and we will be no more.

If that’s true, then it means people do actually want to come out and play again, I mean, if they are afraid of being no more, right? Because being no more, would mean never to ever play again.

What if life is trying to bring you your next kind of play that really is your kind of funnest fun, but you aren’t sure you are ready to risk losing again?,…because you haven’t seen how losing isn’t as sad as it seems, if you let yourself be sad, then the sadness moves, and you get to come out and play again…

You didn’t have to find the play that you once loved so much. It found you, and fun is trying to find you again.

I think that’s just the way it is. People are afraid to be sad because they aren’t sure they are ready just yet for their next fun, their next play.

It’s okay if you don’t think so. That’s just the way I do. I can be sad with you, if you’d like me to…., to feel what you lost and then maybe we can share tears together, which is one kind of play I like to have whenever I need to.

I’ve lost lots of things, but I always find that new things are wanting and ready to come in.

(From the beloved younger part of me called Marvin)

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. You can make a one time donation to SoulFullHeart at https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Collapsing And Awakening Into Deeper Spiritual Consciousness

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

By Kalayna Colibri

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Painting: The Awakening by Anato Finnstark

“Am I real?”

I laid in my twin bed in a room temporarily shared with my soul friend Gabriel, around this time last year, sobbing. This question rang inside of me as I wept uncontrollable, deep tears. I couldn’t track if it was a part of me and in that moment and the moments that followed, it really didn’t matter. I was crying and shedding layers of persona that came pouring off and out of me. Something was moving, though I wasn’t sure what.

It felt so strange to hold this question… it was a true, ‘wow, I feel so f*cked!’ kind of feeling. The ground that had been established for 29 years of my life, many years of spiritual seeking and emotional exploration, was suddenly in deep question. Who was I? Who AM I? Why did I suddenly feel as if I ‘knew’ so little when it came to spirituality, even after so many years of studying this and intuiting that, and listening to this teacher and that teacher?

This work in SoulFullHeart is deconstructive. It brings you to the point where the parts of you that have been shouldering your life and also your spirituality like Atlas shoulders the Earth decide they can’t do ‘it’ anymore. They let in that they aren’t now and perhaps have never been who they thought they were – meaning that now, you can begin to feel that YOU are not who you thought you were. Wow. Even after years of process and doing this piece by piece, part by part, these moments of pure tears of awakening within are not something that can be predicted, they just need to be given the space to happen.

As my tears continued, I thought about Jelelle and Raphael sleeping in a nearby room. I saw them as light beams in their essences. I could feel the identities we each have and need to have to some extent as a costume we sign up for and wear throughout our lives. As humans, we wear our stories like cloaks around our shoulders, and some of us have zippers in these cloaks to bring them in tighter to us. Either way, it’s a costume and it’s temporary. This washed over me, especially while connecting with Gabriel who heard my tears and felt to come over to check on me. I could feel his heart and the heart of Raphael and Jelelle too. I could feel the purifying work we’ve been doing, and I could feel how this is what allows us to go into these spaces when necessary, to fill back up with love again and a deeper sense of our essence.

This experience was visceral for me. It cannot be dissected or analyzed. It was a precious new beginning and recognition of what real spirituality is… it is not something that lives in the mind, though the mind is needed to help us understand somehow,  even though our consciousness can never fully reach out and ‘know’ or understand everything. The mind is also here to help us picture, envision, plan what’s next for us (as much as we even CAN plan these days!). My own mind was collapsing in these moments last year, telling me it was tired. My heart was collapsing and yet strengthening too, telling me it was tired of trying to go beyond itself and into territory that doesn’t resonate or make sense to it in an experiential way.

This was an awakening. This was and is a place where many of us are heading in different strata of our being and the layers of awakening are going to move through us, as they need to and as we ask for them to.

We are dismantling and collapsing and we have MUCH to feel in the process. Our worlds, inner and outer, are in question in poignant moments of disclosure and revelation. We are all awakening, we are all letting go to let in, even if we aren’t fully aware of it. We are not here to criticize one another for wherever it is we choose to go or not go. We are not here to condemn, ridicule or cast aside. We are here to feel ourselves first, to begin entering this process of self-disclosure and discovery, with help, with mirrors, with advocacy, with tears, and with joy too. If we serve love, we are not always positive or optimistic, but we are real, only becoming realer and realer, until the overflow of a heart that wants and receives from self can then serve love to other, assisting them in their own journey of finding this flow within. It is becoming harder and harder to NOT be real now. We are no longer able to spend the currency of the false, at least not for much longer.

How amazing it is, to be able to go here and come out the other side with a deeper sense of love and what it truly offers us… when I look back on this last year of my life since this process, I can see the ways in which it helped to fuel some big shifts inside of me, some of which are still landing deeper and deeper in my soul.

All awakenings we have, no matter how intense, are here to help conduct us through a necessary birth canal that leads us to our most desired outcomes and a deep sense of spirituality that humbles and loves us beyond anything we can begin to fathom – until we collapse into the capacity to do so…

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Energy Update: Activation Of The Higher Heart And Healing The Healer

Published on by Jelelle Awen3 Comments

By Jelelle Awen

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Heating UP, Amping UP…..I have described these energy influxes we have been experiencing as being like a ‘pressure cooker of LOVE’ turned to its highest setting. This seems to be increasing in the last few weeks and as we head into August, an intense month with a lot of activity on the cosmic level. All these energies are putting the pressure on, in a good way, for you to have realizations, come to choice points, and make changes related to your OWN healing as being the priority of your life in order to serve love. The pressure actually comes from INside, from the soul and higher self frequencies coming into the body and igniting the higher heart. This embodiment process creates a pressure inside, a revelation of what needs to be healed….that leads to the changes on the outside.

Igniting the higher heart, the cosmic heart….this is the GRAND awakening and cutting edge of the ascension process. The higher heart is your healing heart on a personal level that then can connect into the unity heart or collective heart as it becomes more healthy. A very important aspect of this healing of your heart on the personal AND the collective level is through accessing your emotional body. Your emotional body contains so much undigested pain and woundings (often mostly NOT conscious to you yet perhaps hugely expressing in your life), which lowers your overall frequency and esp. lowers your heart beacon or frequency. Your heart frequency allows for intimacy, vulnerability, gratitude, and TRUE compassion for self and for others. The higher it vibrates, the more you can BE these things with yourself and with others and towards the WORLD.

Healing the heart is healing the emotional body, which has been largely ignored in most spiritual practices. Mainstream psychology and psychiatry mostly ‘drug and numb’ or ‘talk and block’ in response to the emotional body woundings and how they express. In SoulFullHeart, we connect with the wounded frequencies as parts of you and offer a deeply compassionate and loving way to BE with these aspects of yourself very directly and with feeling tones, not through the mind. As you respond in love (with the support of your SFH facilitator) to whatever fear is within you and your emotional body, so does it heal and move. This healing happens organically and beautifully over time as your soul self/higher self coming into your body holds space for this process. Parts of you don’t need ‘anti-feeling’ drugs; they don’t need numbing and distractions; they don’t need to analyzed without feeling…..what you most NEED is love and the capacity to BE there for yourself and to feel yourself and be felt by others who have done this parts work too on the heart and soul levels. Go here to read more about parts work, sessions with a SFH facilitator, etc: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

I met for a session yesterday with a beautiful soul/facilitant yesterday who has been an energy healer/angelic channel for others for many years. It became very clear to us that while she has offered loving and soothing energies (such beautiful gentle presence!) to others and with animals too, part of her has been blocking her from offering these healing energies TO herself. Everyone else has been the beneficiary of her soul gifts and soul self OTHER than her. We felt together how important it is for her to offer energy healing to herself, meditate and connect with guides and her own parts, and be her own space holder around this every day.

I believe this is very common for healers/teachers and relates to the Inner Protector who is concerned and resistant to you feeling your own pain. It is OK to offer these gifts to others (it brings in money, it feeds a self image as a ‘healer’, it is good work and service), yet to focus on yourself is often a missing gap. You can feel and see signs of this gap if you are struggling to financially provide for yourself through offering your soul gifts, if you are in toxic or push-pull relationships with others, if your physical body suffers from disease or illness….and in many other ways.

These high vibe frequencies are supporting the ‘healing the healer’ phase for those who are stepping into and claiming their purpose to serve love here. The beautiful piece here is that the more self healing that happens through a process like parts work, the MORE pure love you can then offer to others. If that process of self love doesn’t happen, you are actually SHARING your lower vibrational, unfelt and undigested energies and emotions with the people that you are serving! I feel it is a BIG responsibility of ANY healer to go within and do their ‘inner work’ (to me, that would need to include parts work to truly be effective) to continue to qualify to offer healing with others. This especially relates to their emotional maturity and health of their emotional body which, again, has been mostly left out or bypassed in spirituality.

It is a phase of not bypassing anymore what is in need of our love. To recognize and relate with yourself FIRST, offering the love and support to YOU that parts of you have so been aching and craving before. You may even be ‘giving to get’…meaning giving others the love and healing that YOU are so needing actually. The Divine love and light energies are raising your capacities to provide this love and for the primary receiver of it to be YOU.

~

Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond . Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

Acknowledging, Feeling, Honouring And Healing Our Narcissism To Feel Real Compassion

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

by Kalayna Colibri

Look-Within

There are phases of very necessary self-focus. It’s good to dedicate a lot of time to personal process that has to do with YOU as your number one priority. Some of us don’t do this enough, some of us do it too much, and the balance of giving and taking is somehow very challenging to find and live into. Eventually, these phases of needing to go inward have a healthy sense of self-focus that has more of a balance of where the focus goes and comes from a growing emotional and spiritual maturity as we heal and allow in mirrors that help us map out where to go next. This takes a dedication though and the process of it all has not been shown to most of us before, so there is a lot to discover and rediscover as we go, allowing ourselves to get messy and sometimes trip along the way as the best way to learn.

Within our birth families, many of us have been the ‘black sheep’. Parts of us never felt understood and found ways to rebel. This took an enormous amount of self-care and focus, the best parts of us could conjure at the time, and necessarily so – these self-made nests of bedrooms and cozy family basements became our stages for self-exploration. We needed our forays into writing, artistic explorations, fantasy worlds, and eventually spiritual seeking and finding. We needed these phases of pushing away from the collective, from birth family, maybe even from peers and the church and/or education systems, we were wrapped up in. Parts of us started to refuse to go deeper into it… or decided to go in as deeply as possible, following along with another flavour of rebellion that may have meant following the rules only to one day snap and burn it all away. This took whatever ounces of love we could muster and find in our inner and outer worlds, drawing friendships and romances that were (and are), in the end, reflections of how we ultimately felt (and feel) about ourselves.

In order to push away from what we could feel was very much NOT us, or not what parts of us wanted to be, we had to encase ourselves in some degree of HEALTHY narcissism. This encasement may even have stretched well into our adult years, or, we had parts of us that decided to suddenly flip a switch and go far into the other direction, feeling ourselves as deep empaths that can quite powerfully feel others. Even in this though, is a layer of narcissism. There is a layer here of blaming ‘other’ for how and what you feel. There is a fixation on how ‘you’ are being affected by something or someone or somewhere, without truly feeling how and why others may be affected and that you may or may not have a part to play in this too.

Feeling and realizing this shatters our mirrors held up by our own hand, that only show us our self-made goodness, yet not the deeper, more compassionate goodness within that has true innocence and purity of intention. Our narcissism in our years of needing to rebel, needing to find an ‘us’ that could hold life, needing to navigate a spiritual path that we hope will open out to serving others, has been mostly about us and not actually about serving the world or the people in it. This is HARD to look at and feel. This is probably one of the toughest reflections of ourselves and how we’ve operated in this world to take in. True compassion, in my experience, can’t really come unless we are willing to see this piece inside of our shadows. Feeling all of this also frees us from our victimhood that again parts of us have rightfully needed to hold onto… We cannot truly find our power within unless we are willing to go here.

In terms of our Ascension, it could be that this is one of the biggest pieces for us to look at and heal with deep sobriety and dedication. If there is no interest in doing so, there is something to look at with that too, as it’s natural for our deep knowledge of our goodness to not want to have to go here, yet our ‘goodness’ can be a story that parts of us tell, meanwhile they don’t deeply feel they ARE good, until they have been able to feel the reasons why this is… the reasons why they hold this wounding. There is so much unworthiness within that this process brings us to. There are many layers here and each one brings us closer and closer to our higher hearts, our genuine Christ Consciousness, where we can and do shed tears for others, for the world, and then can bring it back inward in a healthy way too, to digest it all in authentic Divine connection and love, and in genuine soul and heart connection with others too.

Being real about not being able to feel or even care for others in a given moment, actually helps parts of us relax and can bring us almost immediately to a more compassionate place within. It also claims our responsibility and our desire to heal this block to serving and giving love. We have not had adequate modeling of how to truly be compassionate in this world. So much of it has been put on for the sake of self-image, it feels like. This has not been ‘bad’ for us though, we are just entering a phase of being invited deeper into it, to question it and ourselves more, and to really heal what we need to in order to be in LOVE in the truest sense. We already have all of the goodness inside of us that we need so as to truly feel and love this aspect of us that again has served us so well for so many years.

There is so much love on the other side of this mirror. So much love that wants to reach you, to flow to and through you. Love that wants to show itself in all of your relationships, in whatever ways it can. It is a love that is ever-purifying and incredibly deep, if only we can start to let it in and allow it to do its work. ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Restless Energies Within And Moving Into New Timelines Physically, Emotionally, Spiritually

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

by Kalayna Colibri

moving on

 

Forgotten, long-lost items are found once again. Finally coming around to cleaning those nooks and crannies where dust and old energies have gotten stuck. Moving on from one space and into another is a process for sure, one that happens with many emotional reactions as we let go of one phase and embrace another. There are physical body reactions too as we enter a new space where old energy needs to be cleared and we feel the clearing too of our ‘old’ space that once held our energy to the brim and beyond. It is a shakedown of sorts, loosening up and releasing something that no longer fits us on a deeper level, though in many cases parts of us may still have attachments to what we moving on from. Sometimes this ‘letting go’ is and needs to be an ongoing process for a while, or a process that ebbs and flows, may seem to be over, but eventually comes back around again. On a soul level, it is natural to want to move on from one place to another, especially as we discover and desire to be in more of our soul bigness, purpose, and power.

This journey of packing up, leaving behind, exploring the new, is something we’re all experiencing now in different waves and on different levels. Some of us are stepping into the new, having many reactions we can’t quite seem to sort through, and then retracting, trying to go back into an old space that has now expired for us in many ways. The picture that comes, is of a growing toddler trying to wear his or her baby clothes again because they were so comfortable once upon a time! This is such a tough process and letting go is never quite as easy as some make it sound, especially if you’ve signed up to truly feel yourself in every moment along the way.

These last two weeks have been full of movement for me personally and this movement process has taken place on a personal, soul, and even physical level. It has been a phase that started with saying ‘yes’ to several new possibilities, trusting that they would take me somewhere new and good, despite the challenge of inhabiting this. Sure enough too, after the ‘yes’ came reactions and a part of me wanting to contract and maybe collapse it all in a way, though she also felt how this would all open out eventually, even with her level of tension. This is a part of me I got to reunite with, actually,  like something that got buried under the bed or dresser so long ago that you only find it when you’re moving somewhere new! She surfaced and I could feel her reactions with her and as the dust settles around the ‘new’ still, I am continuing to feel her around it all – her fears, her joys, and her vision of possibilities too. It has also been a couple weeks of letting go of certain connections with other people which is probably the hardest aspect of this phase to be with.

I feel as if we’re living in a restless, boisterous phase globally in the moment and it does feel challenging to find our stillness within while walking it all out. It is an exciting time while so much is being revealed to us and inside of that are also some hard-to-swallow truths. It is a time where we are being energized to really create the new as we go and not wait for permission from outside of us to take the steps we need to in order to really be in this. It is a time of trust in life, ourselves and the Divine, which is, of course, a process in and of itself while we learn what real trust even is… making it so important to take as much personal space as necessary, to breathe and digest and check-in with what we’re feeling on every level of our being.

If you’re feeling the energy of needing to create new timelines and being in your creativity in whatever capacity comes to you, you’re so not alone and the restlessness is actually there to serve you. It would be hard to not feel restless right now and it may come in waves for you, as it seems to be doing for me. We can all rest assured though, that we ARE being moved to something new that we are co-creating constantly, consciously and unconsciously, and this is becoming revealed to us more and more in each moment we say ‘yes’ and claim the next step.

 

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.