Parts / Subpersonalities – Page 18 – Divine Self Embodiment Blog (Formerly SoulFullHeart)

Taking A Day To Be With Your Inner Child

Published on March 6, 2020 by Kasha Rosa7 Comments

By Kalayna Solais

Dedicating a day to be with your Inner Child or any other part of you is hugely rewarding and such a deep way to express love for yourself. Connecting with parts of you and aspects of your Metasoul in other lifetimes as well is a huge way to really connect in deeply with this frequency of loving and appreciating who and where you are in your journey as it is right now.

There was a day this week that I decided to spend with this deeper aspect of my own Inner Child that has emerged recently. I’ve done so much work, feeling aspects of me like her in many different layers and expressions over the years, that she feels not only like an ‘Inner Child’ but also like she vibrates at a core place inside of my ‘healer’ and ’empath’ too. The sun codes were vibrating and a local park, a personal favourite place to BE in this city where I live, was calling us out to be in it, hanging out with our beloved duck, squirrel, and tree friends. We even brought along our little ‘duckie’ stuffy to ‘introduce’ to the REAL ducks there! 🙂

When I met this part of me, she had been living ‘alone’ in her world until I connected with her in a recent session with Jelelle. Connecting directly with me is new for her and it’s her first time really letting in intimacy. She has some social trauma to keep feeling with her, which all started when I was very little. She is very sensitive and empathic (as Inner Children tend to be) and she is learning how to let others in in a deeper way, with my help, and not assume that others don’t like her or to find reasons to stay in her world all alone, isolating herself from relationships of all kinds.

Discovering her has been a huge, HUGE gift to me, as she is helping me feel the deeper core disconnect from others that has been a habit for me my whole life this life, and where this disconnect has come from all along. She is a big part of my healer’s heart and desire to serve love, so helping her move into a new space in deeper connection with me and also with others I am in relationship with will really help ME step more into my soul purpose work with more self-love overflow and an expanded capacity to hold space for others.

As we spend ‘time’ with these precious parts of us, we are offered a very powerful portal into ourselves. As they become less afraid of ‘getting in trouble’ for what they’ve hidden from us when it comes to who they are and why they’ve reacted in the ways they have to life and relationships too, they can quite quickly shift into their more magical, joyful frequencies, which seems to really free up our hearts in new and arising ways that maybe weren’t exactly expected!

Much love, from my parts to yours. ❤

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart facilitant, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Incoming Spring Sun Codes Remind Us To Be ‘Gentle’ Within

Published on February 29, 2020March 8, 2020 by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Solais

In this hemisphere, we are now skirting the edges of the awakening of spring time, which supports us all to do our ‘spring cleaning’ on ALL layers and levels of our BEing. I walked home from my day job yesterday to take in the sunshine, feeling intuitively that I needed it as support for my own personal transitions and upgrades right now.

What I seemed to capture in the photos I took were some powerful codes that continually encourage emergence from this last winter’s sometimes very intense inward time. I also felt them lighting a spark within. A spark of burgeoning clarity but also of the motivation to keep going, keep feeling, keep letting in the next growth edges and phases while letting in love too.

It’s that ‘while letting in love’ part of it though, that still trips up so many, it feels like. You can be a ‘maniac’ for personal growth and still find it challenging to let in that love is ultimately holding the space for it all, encouraging and supporting you to keep going but to do so with self-love and care too, even gentleness with yourself, which shadow explorations especially need since they have often been so long met with angst and anguish or completely ignored instead.

Sometimes I have to remind parts of me, as desirous as they are to keep experiencing their own healing, that any energies of self-punishment on our way there won’t work anymore… this was especially challenging during my separation from SoulFullHeart this past year. I was reminded by another brilliant, bright soul who is doing this work and living this process that I needed to remember to ‘be gentle’. When she offered me that, I realized how much I, Kalayna, was not holding the process waves coming through but that it was other parts of me, mostly masculine in energy, that were being very hard on themselves to try and ‘get through’ what we were trying much to hard to dive into and feel through. I’ll never forget the impact those words ‘be gentle’ had on me…

And so, here I am, offering them to YOU now…

“Remember to be gentle.”

Maybe this is one of the big messages from the incoming energies right now. As they intensify, actually, we’re left with little choice BUT to discover what being gentle toward ourselves actually means for us individually. The ‘old’ ways of shadow-hunting, of finding ourselves in processes inspired solely by tough and hammering ‘triggers’, of saying ‘yes’ to social situations or going outside of ourselves when what we really need is a bubble bath and some ‘me’ time, are being invited to be felt deeper as we let in and honour the parts of us that have held our/their processes in this way, thinking that they need to stay in their suffering loops in order to experience ultimate healing… in order to ‘deserve’ it/feel ‘worthy’ of it.

There’s so much to tenderly feel with these parts/aspects, however/whenever you can… there are many beautiful guided meditations from Jelelle Awen on our Youtube channel: SoulFullHeart Experience, that can help you start to feel them and bring them into your opening up heart space.

Much love to you, today, and always, during this time of transition into a new internal and external ‘season’ and beyond!

Love,
Kalayna Solais

Raphael and Jelelle Awen are exquisite space holders who are incredible at supporting you in your ongoing personal process. 1:1 sessions with them are available as well as monthly virtual group calls: soulfullheartwayoflife.com

***

The Ongoing Journey Of Serving Love

Published on February 18, 2020March 1, 2020 by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Solais

Service is a journey, not a destination…

When I first started awakening and paying close attention to different spiritual teachers, authors, etc, parts of me took this whole world of being a ‘leader’ in personal development, healing, etc as a place of arrival; as somewhere you land, someday, and never leave and are never really asked to leave. I didn’t know back then about the dis-integrity that often comes with these high-up places and ‘roles’ that are often not heart-inhabited or emotionally awakened though the soul may be quite ‘attained’ in many ways.

Parts of me wanted to be one of them… wanted the accolades, the spotlight, the sense of ‘arrival’ and ultimately having ‘healed’ so much. Really though, it was the feeling sense of living your truest soul purpose day-in and day-out, fully aligned with who you came here to BE and what you came here to offer others that was the shiniest asset for me.
Yet… it wasn’t exactly real.

At least not in the ways that I was thinking it was at the time.
There’s a sheen and a glamour that is starting to fade and tarnish now. There are still those who are worshipped yet the abuses they are part of toward others and ultimately themselves is starting to show through the shiny fabric. The ‘Wizard of Oz’ can no longer hide in this process of Ascension.

Even the most highly praised leaders are starting to realize that their sense of service of others, to whatever degree it’s been genuine for them, is in fact an ongoing journey and not an ultimate destination where you no longer need to grow, to look at yourself, to realize what has been hiding in the shadows of your heart and soul that now need to purge out and be seen and felt, loved and humbled.

The desire that has always been with me to get to some ‘place’ where I can serve love more directly with individuals and groups still lives in me to some degree and every day I feel it. I see it show up in others too, even many young men and women are much younger than me, who have parts of them that feel the need to aim for this ‘destination’ place, often as a way (and it was this for me too, once upon a time) to leap-frog over the necessary life experiences and deeper healing processes that come first and foremost in order to be fully embodied and feel the humility (and humanity too) that comes with being of deep service; an alignment with yourself, your soul, your own ongoing healing process that overflows to others with deep integrity and honesty.

I’ve learned over and over again to not rush myself to ‘get somewhere’ I may not be for a while. Supporting those around me that are in a flow of service feels right to my heart for now. I don’t feel that in this I am shrinking at all from my bigness, but that I’m being given space and an invitation to explore my own process deeper, trusting that all of the inward time opens out as needed into some expression of service that can only expand as my soul does.

Maybe, then, we can say that there IS an ‘arrival gate’ when it comes to service-of-love flow and one that you simply ‘know’ you’ve arrived at when you have, yet that it’s only another leg of your very individual journey of YOUR ever-deepening healing and growth process, meant to shift every ground within and outside of you, in all areas of your life and with all parts of you/aspects of your soul.

Much love to YOU on YOUR journey of ‘arriving’ where you are right now… into the invitation to just keep feeling yourself, trusting that this is what truly takes you, with the most integrity possible, into your next phase of ‘service’ to self and others. ❤

***

SoulFullHeart Museletter: Meeting Your Inner Orphan

Published on February 10, 2020February 24, 2020 by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

It’s the latest release of our Museletter! Offering ALL of our writings, videos, events, healing offerings, and audio blogs for the last two weeks. Go read it here!

Go here to subscribe to receive these in your email inbox!

Meeting your ‘Inner Orphan’ part of you is a sacred process that has been coming up for many souls lately. In this issue’s featured article, SoulFullHeart Teacher/Facilitator, Raphael Awen, shares open-heartedly about his own experience with this process and how it opened out for him:

“I simply tuned in Yeshua as a beloved guide, and dialed in a Golden Earth setting, and there in the magical outdoors, was Yeshua crouched down about 8 or 10 feet away, holding upright a (soon to be) eager toddler, who he then let go, as this beautiful baby focused his gaze on me and began to take his first steps crossing the space between us. Midway across, the name Bartholomew came as plain as day. I received him into my arms, and he readily received me. I intuitively knew that this Bartholomew would change my life, that holding him would require all the rigors of true parenthood and presence of being that this Orphan would need to transmute the pain in his heart, allowing both him and I to shift our destiny and to embody what we intended when we set out on our journey of ‘leaving’ the Divine.”

There are quite a few NEW energy updates from these last two weeks from Jelelle Awen, including an audio blog sharing one of them, some personal process sharings from Kalayna Solais, and a deeper invitation into your own inner process of feeling from Raphael Awen.

Jelelle Awen continues her video series “Deepen 2020”. This series will be offered on an arising basis, rather than every day for a set period of time, and will be responsive to current events/cosmic energies/personal & collective process, etc. Every Deepen 2020 video will offer a teaching and a guided meditation. You can watch these on her Facebook page or our YouTube channel.

You can watch all podcast episodes on the SoulFullHeart Experience YouTube Channel or listen to the audio on the SoulFullHeart Soundcloud channel or iTunes channel.

Jelelle will be hosting the next virtual women’s group call over Zoom on Sunday, February 23rd, at 10am PST. The focus of this group will be on feeling and processing the sacred sisterhood wound. Women may feel a deep longing and familiarity in their soul around the goodness of connecting in bonds with soul and even birth sisters. Even with this longing, there is also the experience of these connections often resulting in competition/envy, not being seen/felt/appreciating and just overall sense of relational challenge to show up for them.

For more information on this and other upcoming events, visit: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/events

Raphael, a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for men and women, is now offering FREE 30-45 minute intro calls over Zoom to see how the SFH process and ongoing 1:1 sessions may support you on your healing and Ascension journey. Jelelle Awen is now working with women new to the SoulFullHeart process in 1:1 bridging sessions. More info here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Thank you so much for your interest in and support of SoulFullHeart Way of Life!

You can become a patron of SoulFullHeart through a one-time or monthly donation via our patreon page.

Check out the latest Museletter here

Inner Punisher And Shame Healing Guided Meditation: Video Seven Deepen 2020 Series W/Jelelle Awen

Published on February 5, 2020February 19, 2020 by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

By Jelelle Awen

In this seventh video of my video series called Deepen 2020, I (Jelelle Awen, SoulFullHeart Teacher/Facilitator) talk about the often intense and largely subconscious relationship between an Inner Punisher part and a corresponding shame reaction in another part (usually an Inner Child or Inner Teenager). This dynamic of Punisher and shame creates a suffering loop that can lower your vibrational frequency, draw MORE judgement/shame from others in relationships, and diverts wisdom into judgements rather than discernment/intuitions felt with love.

I share about my own deep process to heal this Punisher-Shame loop inside myself (which was an internalized dynamic from my caregivers) and how I no longer experience these frequencies inside myself. I talk about WHY this dynamic exists and what the purpose of the Punisher-Shame loop is and it’s this investigation that allows you to ultimately offer compassion towards the parts that are involved in it.

In the guided meditation, I bridge to your Inner Punisher with Mother Mary and Yeshua, who provide a compassionate and forgiving energy of illumination and love to this part of you who can start to feel their essence as discernment and wisdom. We then tune into the part of you that is responding and triggered into shame in response to the Punisher’s judgement. We offer love to this shame-filled part so that they can start to feel their TRUE essence of innocence and goodness again.

Here is a guided meditation to meet your Inner Punisher, which is a good place to start before doing this video: https://youtu.be/SXlufQ_WBUU

Thank you for joining me in this video….as we move into Deepening energies together…..one beloved part of us at a time!

You can watch each video in the Deepen 2020 playlist on my SoulFullHeart Experience YouTube Channel here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLNmrHdaQSAvLjwm17eBBTRhE3dbezYJdu

You can watch videos from my previous 33 Day Deepen series from 2019 here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLNmrHdaQSAvLiLpw1qSOmQE-tsqhGSAD3

Money donations are so appreciated and received with gratitude as an energy exchange to support me and SoulFullHeart to continue providing free offerings such as this video series.

You can donate through paypal: paypal.me/jelelleawen or become a one-time or regular patreon donor: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart

This video series serves as an introduction and bridge to the powerful SoulFullHeart quantum healing process and cutting-edge way of life experienced and offered through 1:1 sessions with Jelelle for women and women and men with Raphael Awen and group calls/events/writings and more. For more information, visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

Meeting Your Inner Orphan

Published on February 4, 2020February 15, 2020 by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

Photo courtesy of https://unsplash.com/@benwhitephotography

By Raphael Awen

What we relate to as suffering, the Divine is passionately interested in. Divinity knew bliss, but had no sense of challenge or difficulty; and thus, no movement.

We feel something as deeply moving because that something flows in between the familiar tension we hold in our being of bliss and it’s loss.

We are the Divine out experiencing movement, growth, challenge and difficulty, all of which the Divine couldn’t know or feel were it not for its choice and our souls agreement to individuate itself into many gods – you and I.

Yes, you and I are saddled with godhood. And this explains our base tones of anxiety and fear. We knew and hold in our being remembrance of there being no separation, no veil of forgetting, no sense of any paradise lost.

This past week, I had a very moving encounter where I felt that it was time for me to formally meet my Inner Orphan Self – this core aspect of my soul who holds all of these tensions; this core aspect of my soul, out of which is born in this life, the Inner Child and Inner Teenager – both of whom are shaped and formed from the Inner Orphan soul aspect.

I simply tuned in Yeshua as a beloved guide, and dialed in a Golden Earth setting, and there in the magical outdoors, was Yeshua crouched down about 8 or 10 feet away, holding upright a (soon to be) eager toddler, who he then let go, as this beautiful baby focused his gaze on me and began to take his first steps crossing the space between us. Midway across, the name Bartholomew came as plain as day. I received him into my arms, and he readily received me. I intuitively knew that this Bartholomew would change my life, that holding him would require all the rigors of true parenthood and presence of being that this Orphan would need to transmute the pain in his heart, allowing both him and I to shift our destiny and to embody what we intended when we set out on our journey of ‘leaving’ the Divine.

This ache of loss held in the Inner Orphan soul aspect is the juice and the portal back to full embodiment, full familiarity, full familial fidelity. We long to return to soar in the heavens and so the Divine gives us the role of parent, re-parenting our own soul aspects as the very portal back to that which we lost only in experience, reassuring us that we never lost the actual possession or birthright of our full godhood.

In the days that followed this experience, I have surely felt a conscious vulnerability and arising of base fears and anxieties, along with deep tears – feeling so small. I have also felt a ‘me’ there who could handle and show up for all of it, as well as the Divine’s confidence in me and gratitude to me for my desire and willingness – that even now as I write these words, I feel a welling up of this support and energy.

I offer support and space holding and process within session space as a SoulFullHeart facilitator to others who wish to undertake such a journey, but it isn’t from any expert place of one who has ‘healed’ their anxiety and thus who has transcended their anxiety, or their depression, or their fear, but rather as one who has welcomed their fear, anxiety and depression. Quite the opposite, at many times, embracing this portal into pain has left parts of me seriously wondering if I hadn’t bit off more than I could chew. I can tell you that time and time again, I continue to come out the other side into newfound joy and range of being – what I see and feel as real transmutation of my being. This in turn only appetizes me for more and makes any ‘attainment’ look and feel like kindergarten all over again as I feel like a bigger beginner every time some ground or embodiment is gained.

Isn’t that what is really to be expected in an infinite love reality? Any and all progress measurement is swallowed up by love’s infinity. You get to be in infinite love if you’re willing to give up your stamp of certification of being anything other than part of this infinity. Certificates only look good on really boring office walls anyway. I’d so much rather know and feel real adventure out in the forest, the city and Golden Earth, with Yeshua, the Divine Mother, and The Divine Father.

Look for me and Bartholomew out and about feeling love and life anew in many ways for the first time. His name meaning is ‘Son of the Ploughman’ which so surprised me as I felt the plough as that which opens and prepares the earth to receive seed – it is through our wounding that the divine seed enters – ensuring that we will never lose our way – even through the deepest loss imaginable. We are ensured that all consciousness is finding its way back to all that it ever was and even being expanded out to more in the process.

That kind of starts to explain the hell you’ve journeyed through, or quite possibly feel like you are journeying through right now, yes? Doesn’t this speak also to the part of you who is more set on only ‘moving forward’ who doesn’t want to cry over spilt milk, who doesn’t want to get lost again in the world of feeling? This part of you will also need your showing up to negotiate the exploration and true healing journey your soul came here to undertake.

My truth is that we all individuated out of the Divine and came here to feel it all, even to get lost in it, so that we could be found by love, and in so doing, be truly of the greatest service to all of love and life.

Thank you for feeling me and for feeling yourself. 🙂💚😇

Much love,
Raphael Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.Com/sessions

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our Patreon Page to send us love in the form of money: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart 🙂

Feeling Held By Divine Mother During Intense Life Transitions

Published on February 1, 2020February 5, 2020 by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Solais

As usual, when the world on the outside feels intense and hard to be a part of, I feel the arms of Divine Mother enfolding us all… encouraging every one of us to go back inward and start there before we try and ‘do’ anything on the outside, for if we can come from love (especially of self) and not despair or disdain in our action-taking, we are miles, leaps, infinite bounds ahead of the intensity of collapsing timelines and the pain of what’s burning up still in 3D life and conditioning.

It occurred to me yesterday that often when my own life is shifting, I end up making choices that are somehow rooted in wanting to dismiss what ‘isn’t working’ anymore or to have an energy of disdain or even despair and disappointment leading the charge. I began to feel into this as the way that parts of me have ‘had to’ lead decision making oftentimes in the past. But, what if that doesn’t ‘have to’ be true anymore? What if now I can come from a heart that is FULL of trust and love, understanding that sometimes things don’t work out the way parts of me were picturing they would, but that ultimately my soul is leading something GOOD?

And, what if this is an invitation not only for me but for others too? Because if I’m feeling it for myself, it’s definitely something that is rumbling through the Oneness that connects us all…

I know for myself that making space to go back inward and collect the parts that are feeling upset, distraught, unsure, uneasy, etc, helps to settle the energies, remind them that I am here, that they are supported, that they can trust me and trust the Divine. If I don’t feel like I can hold a candle for easing the distress they might be feeling, then I’m not taking enough space to feel myself and to create that Haven/Heaven they need to lean into inside of me.

This is the template that Divine Mother provides us through absolutely everything we face and walk out. She offers too, much much context to lean into if we can be still long enough to hear and feel Her when things feel overwhelming and hard and when life is in upheaval. Patiently she waits by our side as we pick up the pieces of our breaking hearts. Openheartedly she holds compassionate space for what we are learning to hold space for in ourselves and what we are learning to create with Her, with love, in our outer worlds.

So often, even when I’m in the middle of a deep fog and A LOT of pain is coming up from whatever part/soul aspects I’m working with, I hear her say to me, “You are finding your way…” and even when it feels as if I’m not, I know and trust that I am.

“You are finding your way” can sometimes mean we are fumbling in the dark for a while trying to figure out how to turn on the light. It can sometimes mean stumbling upon ‘roadblocks’ on our way to realizing our desires. I’ve never felt Her say to me that I shouldn’t want what I feel I want. I have only ever felt Her encourage me (and especially my masculine aspect who is used to finding ways to just ‘get it done’) to keep surrendering to the timing and the overall unfolding, but not to dismiss the dream altogether, for the ‘how’ is far less important than the dreams of the heart and the overall journey of the soul that we really cannot help but be on.

Much love to you during these ‘Imbolc’ energies that feel like they are inviting transitions into new timelines, all held by Divine love and support…

Support is here in SoulFullHeart should you feel drawn to a session with Raphael or Jelelle Awen and there are many guided meditations that may help you as well on our Youtube channel: SoulFullHeart Experience.

Love,
Kalayna Solais

***

Could It Be?

Published on January 27, 2020February 5, 2020 by Raphael Awen2 Comments

By Raphael Awen

Stewing in thoughts or feelings finds movement when there is a you there who is willing to begin to feel what is stewing and why with curiosity and compassion.

Emotion and feeling are two words that speak their truth. One speaks of motion and the other of touch, or contact. Motion and touch create a ‘to and from’. Without this to and from, there isn’t a flow, and we’re back to the stasis of the stewing; stuck in a prolonged suffering over our difficulties.

Our difficulties are difficult enough. Why would parts of us choose to stay in suffering over our difficulties, rather than feel what is wanting to be felt, and thus let in the movement?

Could it be that to parts of us, the known suffering is better than the unsafe unknown?

Could it be that to parts of us, they’ve never been accustomed to an other with an open heart? Could it be that parts of us have been so long conditioned to a world without feeling that the prospect of feeling is a distant memory of an unsafe reality, that needs to be resisted for the land mine experience it was?

How could you find out what is true now for parts of you and why? Are parts of you open to a new experience of ‘flow to and from’ of whatever it is that is wanting to be felt in your sacred world?

Are you and parts of you ready to let in the next stages of your own largesse of being by feeling the most contracted and small feeling parts of you?

If these words call to you, and you feel you would like some help, I offer a free intro call intro call to talk more with you about the process we offer. Message me if you are interested.

Honouring Your Own Unique And Very Personal Journey Of Ascension

Published on January 23, 2020January 28, 2020 by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

By Kalayna Solais

Feeling behind. Feeling as if we are risking being ‘left behind’ if we aren’t able to tune into what everyone else that shares awareness of Ascension is tuning into and feeling personally. Fearing that we aren’t going to be enough to ‘ascend’ or to be ‘chosen’ TO ascend, perhaps.

These are feelings that I think so many of us can resonate with on some level. These fears feel existential and like they live in our Metasoul aspects in other timelines who HAVE been ‘left behind’ by others and on a deeper level still, there’s more to feel about ‘abandonment’ by the Divine too… maybe also in this life parts of you have trauma from the ‘competition’ conditioning, from growing up in a culture where you are always striving to be THE best, not YOUR best or even just where you are at and having that be ok. There are so many layers to this and for me, I’m still discovering many of them personally and how deep they go.

I’m a part of a highly catalytic process and soul family community that we always say is on a ‘moving conveyor’. The more work you do within you, the more your outer world changes and the more shifts you feel invited to take of your own volition too. The more parts of you that you feel in their traumas and begin to have a relationship with, the more you realize the changes you need to make in your life in ALL areas of your life.

This means that at any time, one of us could decide unilaterally that there is something we need to address, move on from or move toward, and that could be a big thing or a small thing. There are always next and next and next steps too as the inner awakening and openings deepen. There are new discoveries and new strata of consciousness that begin to open up and out. New relationships are drawn. New alchemy on all levels. All of these are sacred journey markers that are very individual and a result of the individual journey. It look and feel like pure ‘magic’ and it really is, but it’s also worked very hard for.

When you have conditioning in your soul’s timelines and the heart of your parts from this lifetime that there is something always to envy in others for the sake of feeling badly or ‘not good enough’ inside of yourself, this isn’t that easy to digest all the time. Jealousy can be kicked up. A feeling that you must be lacking something or have something ‘wrong with you’ if you aren’t experiencing what they are experiencing. This is one of the major reasons why I needed the break I did…. so that this comparison dance and suffering loop could be deeply felt into by me, so that I could arise for myself with more respect and self-love. This could only happen if I got big enough for my most intense and self-punishing parts/aspects to lean into me. This was the crux of my process at times in relationship to the lives of others around me too… feeling parts of me envying their skills (that they’ve worked hard for), their fitness level, their relationships, etc. This has gone on and on for me for as long as I can remember… and only now is this starting to shift into new ground.

Why is it SO hard to just BE with our own journey? Why do we look to others for templating but then resent them for it at times?

These questions feel complicated and like the answers lie within every individual. I think it’s so hard to remember that we are ultimately here to experience Ascension in a PERSONAL way, though we are returning to oneness too. I’m discovering, especially as I feel a relationship beginning with a Reptilian aspect of me, just how deep this ‘programming’ of avoiding the individuation process of our healing and Ascension actually goes and why it can feel a bit scary.

I had a yoga teacher once, many years ago now, who offered something during class that made us all laugh but it was actually quite poignant. She was showing us the many stages of one particular posture. When she got to the most advanced one, she said,

“See? There’s NOTHING there! There’s no need to rush yourself into this ‘advanced’ place when you have so much to discover along the way”.

That really impacted me at that time and it remains with me today because I think I was supposed to take that in deeply for my own ongoing experience of spirituality and of life itself… it really IS about the journey and not the destination. Ascension is a journey. ‘5D’ is not really a destination so much as an invitation into a new frequency in which to anchor our consciousness as much and as often as we can. Every individual’s soul expression and attainments are their own, often worked for over multiple lifetime experiences and deep inner work too. There’s nothing left to ‘envy’ if we can see it this way… but there could be a lot to be inspired by!

Plus, our own journeys, when we have the space within to honour them, are proof positive of our own inner work and also the growth and healing phases that we personally need that are a reflection of our bigness in order to be with them. Maybe there is no ‘ultimate destination’ but in fact, it all keeps deepening and expanding from here. This is such a humble way to look at and hold ourselves and this whole Ascension process on a collective level too.

I wanted to share this bit about my own journey and discoveries as an expression of my own uniqueness that I’m learning to embrace more and more. I hope that it helps you feel more love and respect for your own too… for the journey you’re on as YOU.

Much love! ❤

Kalayna

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart facilitant, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Connect With Your Emotional Body Guided Meditation Video – Deepen 2020 W/Jelelle Awen

Published on January 7, 2020February 3, 2020 by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

By Jelelle Awen

Connect With Your Emotional Body Guided Meditation – Video Three Deepen 2020

In this third video of my video series called Deepen 2020, I talk about the importance of connecting with your emotional body through accessing parts of yourself and digesting emotional traumas with them in a feeling-based way (not through mental analysis or bypassing with spiritual frequencies). I talk about how we are conditioned and trained to overly focus on the development of our mental bodies (and even our physical bodies and spiritual bodies) over our emotional body, which is often trailing behind in maturity, health and porosity/lightness. And that much of what we feel as ’emotions’ is actually reactions and off gassing from undigested traumas in our emotional bodies.

In the meditation, Mother Mary and Yeshua join us as Divine feminine and masculine energies that are very emotional body and heart-based in frequency and can hold space for emotional digestion. Your Inner Protector is invited as well and we journey to connect with your emotional body, as represented in visualization as a river. You are invited to see and feel how your emotional body river is right now and to wade into it…bringing healing energies with you.

Thank you for joining me in this video….as we move into Deepening energies together…..one beloved part of us at a time!

You can watch each video in the Deepen 2020 playlist on my SoulFullHeart Experience YouTube Channel here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist…

You can watch videos from my previous 33 Day Deepen series from 2019 here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist…

Energy exchange increases the receiving of healing! Money donations are so appreciated and received with gratitude as an energy exchange to support me and SoulFullHeart to continue providing free offerings such as this video series. You can donate through paypal: paypal.me/jelelleawen or become a one-time or regular patreon donor: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart

This video series is a useful introduction and bridge to the powerful SoulFullHeart quantum healing process and cutting-edge way of life experienced and offered through group calls/sessions/retreats and 1:1 sessions with Jelelle and other SoulFullHeart Facilitators. For more information, visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

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