Feeling Held In The Arms Of Gaia

46

Staring at my Facebook app ready to type, the words “What’s on your mind?” are at the top of the text box.

“I am not sure what is ‘on’ my mind, but I did want to feel what is in my heart.”

“Ah…okay. Well, maybe that is coming in the new update.”

UPdate. Yes. That is what is happening. A date with UP. This particular one has felt a bit removed from a part of me. Like a far off mirage of glittering jewels, or a chocolate croissant. (Yeah, I don’t know. Who knows what is coming out of me today.) There are times when it can seem like you are riding the wave and other times you can’t get on the damn surfboard.

I am aware that is a part of me. However, that does not invalidate what is real. It is the truest thing in the moment. There are many changes occurring, much that is being offered to let in, digest, and integrate. To this part of me, it feels like it is more than he is capable of showing up for. It is an invitation to come out of the shadows and accept more of a role in what is occurring on a planetary level.

So I take him to the one place that I know may bring some air and connection. Nature. In the arms of Gaia. There he is held and remembered. Given a reboot. A kiss on the 6th and a massage on the 7th. She knows what to do. The spine resting on Her sandy shore while She whispers and spins stories of Now.

“Feel the flow of this moment, my son. The breeze that carries your new and releases your treasured old. The changes of the fallen vestiges of what was held so dear. Call upon your strengthening desire for more. Look UP, dear one. You are not lost, just afraid. It is okay. Just Be. Be with it, feel it, love it. That is your portal, my love.”

The moment becomes this place of preparation. A tilled ground awaiting its seed. All else is left as the mulch of its pregnant emergence. She is with me still in the Still. Absorbing Her love into my being, nourishing this part that has found a rest and going on place.

Your heart needs an open space to let in all that wants to shift and emerge inside of you. Give it the environment it needs to help that along. Deep rest. Deep connection. More IS here and in the way. Loving yourself and your parts is the best way to let that in.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Current Energies Activating Your “Not You” True You

44

The You that is Not You is getting lit up. Highlighted. Sparked by deep, layered activations in the recess of your True You. The holes in the Whole are gurgling, pulsing, calling. This can come out in so many significant ways that may be interpreted as a simple “this” or “that”. There is nothing insignificant about anything anymore. Never was. The physical symptoms, the sensitivities, the frustrations, the questions, or the sudden collapse of relationship and livelihood.

It grows deep within you. The connection of your Highest Self back to essence. Not to merge back into forgetfulness, but to experience the Dual Consciousness of I As All and All As I. These seemingly random occurrences are Remembrance pains. When these bubbles make their way to the surface, they off-gas into your waking consciousness causing shifts and movements. They can create havoc if you don’t have a means to hold them in a greater context.

Breathing through them is one way to let the energies find their ground within you. Self-loving acts of rest and pleasure can aid in this. They can be beyond mind and our current available consciousness. The work is being done on a much grander scale. There is also much to be felt within our capable and readied hearts. There are messages coming to us that are meant to shake things up that kick up emotional triggers in our 3D and 4D self. Our 5D nature is making its way into the fold and that creates a tension within.

It is not a press, mind you. But an offering that is hard to ignore. With each step Gaia makes, with each opening and integration the collective experiences, the more we are coming closer to what we have always been and yet have forgotten. In that forgetting there is a pain and a fear. There is a lot for our inner parts and soul aspects to feel and release. For those that have signed up for this, it can be quite a crucible to navigate all the energies coming up. The feeling that what life used to be like is not what is meant to continue.

There is a way to be with all these rumblings. This arising awareness. The pain that it may be causing. It is a process of feeling the parts of you that are these bubbling pockets of Not You (Anymore). It is a guided path of “selves discovery” that is meant to bring you back into Wholeness. Into the space of deep feeling and healing. Into a sacred relationship to yourself as Essence and to another as Union. Traversing a subconscious terrain to integrate and express all that is wanting to come into and out of you.

SoulFullHeart offers this very unique and powerful way of being with all that is arising inside and manifesting outside. It is a portal to a deeper version of You that the universe is conspiring in your favor even in the uncertainty.  If it just doesn’t seem to make any sense and you need to feel a set of heartrails to see where it may take you we offer a free 30-minute session to see if it may be a fit for you and your journey.

You can get more of our energy by participating in this Saturday’s group call on Zoom. It will be led by the co-creators of SoulFullHeart, Raphael and Jelelle Awen. This is a great way to take in more teachings and perspectives as well as a guided meditation and time to share and ask questions. You can get more information by visiting  http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/groupcalls

 

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

When Sacred Intimacy Finds You Brother, Go In Not Away

Blog Collage

She comes into your life like a surging storm of passion and purpose. Or she may have been there all along waiting on the wings of your heart until you were ready to truly see her and let her in. Either way your life will not be the same because she won’t let it. She is not here to be the complacent companion or the sexy sidekick. She is here to invite you to feel your deepest fears and MANifest your greatest expression of being. You drew her because you were ready to move beyond the confines of casual comfort. Ready to inhabit your inner King and challenge the places that you have been stuck in growth.

She is the sacred feminine seeking her sacred masculine counterpart. She lights up your divine inspiration, opens and deepens your wounded and healing heart, she sparks your passion and creativity. She also brings in a mirror. A reflection of your largess that is hard to let in because you have parts that have yet to see it in themselves. Her fire highlights the places within you that are dampened and protected. You feel the places where she is dangerous to the parts of you you didn’t know you had until you went deeper into your truth.

Yeah. Your truth. What is real inside of that masculine heart of yours? Do you feel where parts of you have cordoned off the rage, the hurt, the fear of being seen in totality? There is much in the wounded male heart that has been buried in reaction to what lies in the recesses of our shadow. A collective and personal feeling of unworthiness with rumblings of other lives of suppression and dominance. Of being repressed and dominated. What would come out of your mouth if the gates were left open? This is the unknown world that sacred intimacy is guiding you into and it is a scary yet luminous journey.

She is the one I never knew I was looking for. She brings edges and mountains to a flatter world a part of me had created to keep thing the same. It is holding space for the deeper feelings of the parts of me that may not be all on board to this type of intimacy as they have been safely enjoying anonymity. She engages my leading edge while advocating to feel my trailing edge of truth in its realness. She calls for me to challenge her in her bigness as a challenge to my past care-taking. It is getting dirty and muddy when we have found ourselves at a dissonance to feel where we are truly in resonance. The end is always possible while the infinite is right at hand. This is a brave new world for me and for her.

I know my beloved Kalayna and I are just in our sacred infancy in some ways but we have been through much together. We have the blessed modeling of Raphael and Jelelle and yet we have our own challenges and uniqueness. I have much to feel and show up for in this continued deepening. As a man, there is a lot to trust and a lot to stand up for within myself. This can only be done by truly feeling the parts of us that hold resistance and passion both. This is the true passion ground of our sacred masculinity and heart-open sexuality. With Her, you and I will never be the same.

 

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

From A Bud To A Flower: Sweet Sacred Union Beginnings

by Kalayna Colibri

IMG_0276

That feeling of being in his arms… finding our way back to each other, after years of being in and out of relationship together, depending on what parts of us needed.

The letting in of his kiss… the swirl of the softness and stillness I feel in me in the receiving, that is echoed somehow in his masculine sacred King.

The exploration of sacred sexuality… the dedication and passion that opens out in every curve, every pore, letting emotions rise and fall and tears wash away the remnants of painful times, phases of less connection from heart to soul to body and back again.

So much moves in and through as I walk out each conscious moment with Gabriel. We have traversed so much terrain together over the last 5 years, sometimes in a romantic bond, other times not. This time feels more real and realistic too… though we cannot ever ‘know’ and can only feel what’s true in the moment.

Sacred Unions… they don’t happen by chance. They happen as we continue the work we are so committed to within. That commitment and that cultivated love that comes from it, flows in concert with another when we are ready for it to, the timing of which is not exactly up to us. The timing of anything truly special and unique moving into our lives is not up to us or parts of us, though parts may try and sabotage or avoid it, or work extra hard to ‘keep’ it. Love is a flowing river that gets to be shared with others once your own flow is in enough abundance that it can. Until then, your filling up love-flask needs your attention only.

Everyone can do ‘work’ on themselves and draw different sorts of mates to them… yet I don’t know of any other work that draws Sacred Unions in the way this path of SoulFullHeart does. Working with parts and soul aspects is instrumental to the understanding of who you are and have been in relationship as well as who you could become. It is an incredible way to get to know a partner too and to let them know you. It is an unending path of discovery and re-arising for each other, again and again and again. Nothing can stay the same for long, for there can be no stagnancy in this work. As you heal and awaken, your partner is asked to go with you and you with them, frequently changing the ground of the relationship. Nothing at all can become ‘boring’ in this sort of relationship, where the mirror is constantly there, though sometimes at very awkward angles, and you are invited to care as much if not more about YOU as you do about the other.

I am blessed to be where I am with Gabriel right now… the experiences of deepenings and openings too, that come sometimes on the other side of tension and process both together and separately too. We have frequencies of all sides of relationship… best soul friend, deep heart lover, hot body talk and sexuality, sweet tears of feeling one another, times of merging, times of feeling separate. There is so much here to feel and be and be in. I am blessed, yet we have both worked hard to be at this level of process too, where we can let this bond in… though there are parts of us that resist it at times, that can feel how challenging this sort of relationship can be, that would perhaps rather just be single. Yet the hearts of both of us are committed to this NOW and the next NOW, allowing the romance to arise and move as it needs to, with no knowledge of how long it could last, and no expectations around this, though there are conscious desires too.

To be in a budding and emerging Sacred Union is a gift that comes with a process, that comes with yummies and challenges, both. And without this healing path called SoulFullHeart that holds and calls to each of us continually, we would be caught up in a net of unmoveable binds instead of illuminating bonds that can heal these binds. This is one of the golden trophies we hold very sacredly in SoulFullHeart… the light at the end of a long tunnel of necessary singlehood, that has also been held as good and sacred and blessed. Sacred Union is worth the precipice and trust fall within that allows you to let YOU in and eventually another too. And it is one of the most profound gifts of our sacred humanity expressing in conscious duality. ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

 

My Magical Experience Of Sacred Union Through The SoulFullHeart Process

By Jelelle Awen

r and I kiss

This man….this soul choosing to BE in life with me. As partners in this dance of feeling and healing. As co-creators of a vocation that offers a service of love with others that arises as a genuine passion. As journeyers into the depths of ourselves and all the aspects that live inside of us. As co-integrators of shadows that live in our Metasouls and our counterpart pairings in different timelines: Lemuria, Atlantis, ‘ancient Greece’, Arcturian, and more.

This kind of partnership is not what we have been conditioned to believe about relationships in 3D life. 3D offers us not templates of two souls moving into health in ALL areas of their lives individually AND together…yet rather examples of unhealed and congested wounded places inside of each of them that often clash and burn or cling and bind….. until whatever love they had between them runs out of ground.

More scared unions than sacred unions are these, formed from undifferentiated parts of the 3D self ‘hooking up’ with each other. These hookups can look like two Inner Protectors guarding and ‘fighting’ each other; an Inner Matriarch (wounded masculine in the woman) with the Inner Patriarch (wounded masculine in the man); and many others. We need these reflections in others (that includes all relationships actually, with birth family esp.) until we no longer do in the same way.

The TRUE authentic selves, the higher selves coming into body of each partner may not claim much space on the dance floor of the relationship as it is so rarely safe enough INSIDE to allow for this overflow of genuine expression to come out. Lust then supplements for awhile and karma drama from other lifetimes and timelines, all without much consciousness around it. Duty and obligation can come in there too, along with needs to feel safe and secure.

This can be the experience of polarity and push-pull in 4D relationships. There is this sense of soul mating, of soul resonance, of belonging together in 4D consciousness around relationships. There are moments of genuine connection and even grounded bliss. Moments where two hearts can feel each other. Two bodies can connect with each other. And, yet, there is still the unfelt 3D stuff/wounding that anchors each partner into suffering loops and patterns. It anchors them into moments of fusion with 3D parts of themselves again. They go up and down in this unconscious cycle of push-pull together and the ceiling of good will, respect, and mutuality often crashes down around them eventually.

With Raphael, over our nine years together, I experience that we can navigate the murkier grounds of reactions and triggers together WHILE maintaining a larger container of love and goodness in the process. We don’t avoid what is in shadow or what is difficult. We don’t float in bliss together at all times (although many times we do, especially when we experience deep heart openings that come from moving through something difficult and come out the other side of it with MORE love.) We have been able to show up in relationship with each other this way because we have shown up for ourselves and parts of us in this way. With curiosity, we hold space for the energies that move through us. We feel them as very distinct and even commonly definable parts of ourselves that we have felt in so many others too.

Raphael and I can sit in conflict and tension together, as we did the other day for almost eight hours. Not to suffer in this space or to ‘beat each other up’ emotionally. Yet, rather, because we honor the energies inside and in our Metasouls that NEED this space to express and be relationally with an intimate other person and soul. The trust and love ground that we have between us and inside of us and in the Divine holds the space. We stay in the room together through it, allowing, and BEing with the fears that can live inside about the relationship completing, running out of ground, etc. Yet, we find the next going on place together and the next….AS we are willing and open to let go EVEN AS we are deeply committed to the union.

This IS possible through the parts work process, through the SoulFullHeart way of life and process that we offer and have been very deeply, personally engaged with for ten years. This understanding and feeling space that we create inside with parts of ourselves allows for the transaction together in an increasingly high frequencies of soul, body, heart, and mind AND integration of shadow too.

Someone commented the other day when I shared a joy moment that came after more Metasoul pairing integration with Raphael, ” I love how you’re really doing this – for real!” Yes, we really are and so can you….starting from inside of you, creating an inner sacred union with ALL aspects of yourself…..and this eventually drawing the your mate of soul, body, heart, and mind to be in it WITH you too!

~

Raphael’s comment on this post: “The challenge that arose between us a few days ago that Jelelle refers to was for me the most challenging yet, encountering a part of myself that has lived in my shadow…, something I don’t think would arise were it not for an intimacy as deep and ‘strange’ as ours. I say strange because the intimacy and magic I have and do experience with Jelelle still feels incomparable to a part of me, incomparable to anything I’ve seen or known or saw portrayed. I’ve tended to feel that strange magic in very private places, feeling also the vulnerability of it ending.
Now the universe is inviting us to self permit ourselves to offer to serve others in leading with what we have in deep transparency, feeling how opaque leaders and murky spiritual offerings are a thing of the past for so many souls now.
And….I’m feeling a ton of relief to be coming out the other side of an intense integration, or to the beginning of an integration in another way…
We are all being invited to a place where our life’s message is ‘I am the real thing, and if I ever feel less than that, I’ll be the first to admit that’.”

 

~

We offer a FREE 30 minute introductory session with us to get a sense for how the SoulFullHeart process could apply to you, your life, your desires, your frustrations, the parts inside that want and need you:soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

This photo was taken during an energy session with Raphael where I acted as midwife in moments, teacher in moments, student in moments, lover in moments, friend in moments….such is the multidimensional way we are with each other..

~

Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Sacred Feminine and Sacred Union Facilitator, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond.

Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, videos, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Loving And Healing Your Invulnerability: The Gateway To Your Sacred Humanity

42

To a part of us, Love is scary as Hell. Our invulnerability, our protection from totally feeling what is churning inside of us, is the expression of that part. Or in-expression as the case may be. This feels especially true for men, yet women have their own version of it too. It can also come out in expressed rage, as there is something so very vulnerable underneath it…a deep feeling of hurt and rejection. Our outer defenses are both guarding something precious as well as preventing something precious at the very same time. It is Love seeking Itself inside of you.

What is scary is letting the guard down and exposing what has been hidden. It is the exposure of the hurt, the fear, the guilt, and the truth in all its edges and judgment. It is the fear of seeing something that feels “ugly”, which is only a judgement we carry in ourselves. It is the very real possibility that life will forever be changed and made unknown. The guard keeps the safe intact, while Hell itself reigns supreme inside the fortress walls.

There are aspects of us that have not seen the light of our own consciousness until we begin the deep work of inner healing. It is a journey into lands that are filled with creatures both of light and of dark. The shadow is a storage warehouse of sorts. An invisible doorway until we trip on the wire that is hooked up to it by our own experience. It holds all things unsightly and extremely sacred to us. All of our greatest power and potential resides in these lands for us to reclaim when we have decided the time is Now. Until then, the universe, in concert with our Higher Self, continues to send us what we need to continue this dance with Love, whether in resistance or unison.

As Gaia edges her way “forward” in her ascension and union with Love, we too experience the Light knocking at the door of our most guarded self. The guardian at the gates may feel an attack is brewing and will double down on protection by any means. Or it may just decide that it is done with the gig and look for help in the solace of your sacred human heart. We are key-holders, yet we must negotiate with our protector as we need their help in the reintegration of all that has been locked away.

Going IN, is ultimately the only way to go UP. Without fully seeing and feeling what is hidden will we ever truly feel what it means to be seen. To be altered and transmuted by Love. This is the ultimate invitation of sacred romance and intimacy. You can only go so far on your own as you need an other, in the deepest and scariest waters, to see what you couldn’t or weren’t willing to see or feel. Ascension is stillborn outside the gates of our shadow. Being vulnerable with your invulnerability is what takes you to the burning grounds of all that is not in your highest being.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Emotosomatic Healing: The Deep Roots Of Parts Work

41

My recent back and neck pain has found a home in my heart. What I mean by that is that through a deep emotional movement and process with my beloved Kalayna, and energy sessions with Jelelle, the intense spasms and stiffness got felt in a deeper emotive root. The part of me that was using the pain as a protection and a way to get my attention was able to surrender into vulnerability and trust in the open hearts of both myself and my mate. It was an experience that demonstrated the power of our emotions and intimacy to transmute and heal.

Though the term “psychosomatic” is more commonly used, we feel that it is the emotional body that is ‘upstream’ of the mental body. Our emotions are energy in motion that translate into thoughts that have their own waveform and power. So, yes, what I was thinking was having a huge impact on my body, but what I was thinking was stemming from an emotive ground. So more specifically our physical ailments are “emotosomatic”, as coined by Jelelle.  This is an agreeably mental distinction, but it feels important to highlight how physical pain is framed in SoulFullHeart without a claim that we have THE answer. It comes from our experience. One that is very evident to me.

The original source came from waking up one morning, after Kalayna and I had decided to move in together, with slight neck and back pain. This grew in intensity without an experience of an outside event such as a fall. It grew so fast and so intensely  that it rendered me on the couch, as even walking in the neighborhood felt painful. Kalayna and I were not able to really be close to each other as the pain found its way between us. While it is easy for our 3D self to take it at face value and just deal with the reality at hand, if we are to truly embody that what we experience IS a creation of our own power and making, then what was the suffering and pain all about? This is the place to go in curiosity and true self-awareness.

A part of me was using the severity of the pain as a way not to really feel the deeper root underneath it all. I found myself fusing to the pain, meaning I wasn’t able to see outside of it. For those that have major chronic pain, it is understandable and I get it. BUT, if we are to truly get through the pain it needs be gotten under. This is where conscious intimacy, especially romantic, can have such a powerful effect. Kalayna, and a part of her, had to be honest with its impact on us and her.

It was hard to feel that, and not feel the impulse to be defensive and resort to a state of powerlessness. In the tears, we felt our romantic past and how a pattern was repeating itself. I could begin to feel the difference between me now and me then and how much I, Gabriel, needed and wanted a sacred union but another part of me was in resistance for various reasons.  Using her gift of intuition, she helped me to feel some other dimensional layers that resulted in a vulnerable holding of an aspect of me that has been in isolation for so long. The touch of another brought significant tears that held the energy of trauma and loneliness.

The next day I found myself in a dramatically different physical space and was even to go out to dinner and enjoy some walking around town. Totally unimaginable the day before, as I could barely get off the couch and walk around the apartment. More poignantly, I am feeling this aspect of me in my heart and not in my spine any more. The pain was felt at its root and is now a process in my heart that I can  be with consciously. A deepening occurred between Kalayna and myself and we can now start to feel what else is there for us to feel with the pain out of the way. It brought us to a vista of what lies between our hearts and souls to heal.

I felt very inspired to share this personal experience to demonstrate the power of parts work and the nature of pain as based in the emotional body. There is so much to learn about ourselves and what lies in between us and real love. There are souls that have taken on huge physical challenges that are meant for their own growth in ways that can only be illuminated by going into the heart and feeling the hidden pain that lies in the deep emotional and spiritual roots.  What is it that your soul is wanting you to finally heal? Ask your pain. Ask for help.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Letting In Joy That Comes From INtegration And INtimacy

By Jelelle Awen

20170310_181901

Just feeling much joy in the moment, goodness about my life and where ALL this is headed….even when it is hard, dark, challenging, necessarily painful at times. THIS return to joy, the natural bubbling up of it that especially comes when you have gone in and through something difficult inside of yourself….it creates this sense of trust that it will be worth it to GO IN. To feel. To BE. To connect.

The veils continue to be so thin between other lifetimes that going in is doesn’t even seem optional at this point…esp. for those of us awakening. I have been in that inner process this week with a new Metasoul (‘past life’/other lifetime) aspect of mine from an ‘Ancient Greece’ timeline…that has been quite a bit to navigate at times. Feeling her tears and her fears…and in connection with a Metasoul counterpart from the same timeline of Raphael‘s which he shared about yesterday in his beautifully vulnerable posting about his process. These two Metasoul aspects had angst, power plays, are lovers and yet had little intimacy as they both tend to push it away. None of this feels like it is in the past or actually ‘ancient’ so these energies are strong and influential. As we bridged to them inside of ourselves, we then created a NEW bond between them….including beginning the process of changing a tragic outcome to their timeline.

The presence of these two Metasoul aspects of ours was around as we made love in the early morning, and I could feel them taking in the goodness, pleasure, heart connection, and soul connection that Raphael and I experience together. It is interesting to have Metasoul aspects ‘witness’ in this way, especially during love making, and it def. brings a wonderful, multidimensional frequency, a soul richness to it! And sometimes tears come as soul pain and karmic binds are washed out by love. It feels like such a blessing to have a partner go into these grounds with me, in the flesh, navigating all these dimensional realities and in life too.

The void can be an aspect of this process and may even be a necessary one for you, as I wrote about yesterday……yet, too, inviting self intimacy into your life with genuine joy and loving presence when you are ready then ALLOWS for intimacy to come with others in ways that are so nourishing, intimate, deep, and meaningful. These new textures of intimacy help wash away the trauma and pain from the previously dissatisfying experiences of relationships. Connecting with the parts of you that resist this intimacy, that want to protect you from getting hurt, that guard your heart, I feel is SO important to experiencing this intimate self relationship and with others too….it certainly has been for me and my Beloveds. You can read more about the process we offer around parts work/Metasoul connection and integration here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sfhprocess

Raphael and I will be hosting a live stream in about three hours….at 11:11am CST on our SoulFullHeart Facebook Page and You Tube Channel….you can ask us questions in the moment about ascension, spirituality, emotional body healing, parts work, the SoulFullHeart process, 3D/4D/5D selves, sacred union, sacred sexuality, connection with Guides/Metasoul aspects, disclosure. Ask in the moment or you can offer your question here and we’ll respond to it during the livestream, which will probably last about an hour:https://www.facebook.com/soulfullheartwayoflife/?pnref=lhc

We’ll also be hosting a SoulFullHeart group call on November 11 at 11:11am CST (couldn’t resist that lovely repeating number energy) offering teaching, guided meditation, and personal sharings for a $11 min. donation/energy exchange:https://www.facebook.com/events/124047068285647

WE’d love for you to join us in the joy, the radical realness, the GIFTs and the learning….in the LOVE.

~

Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Sacred Feminine and Sacred Union Facilitator, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond.

Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, videos, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Conversation With My Spine: Day Three- Feeling And Healing With Compassion

Osteopathic belly massage.


M: Good afternoon, spine. This has been a hard day.

S: Yes. A lot to take stock of. The spasms are a tough one to be with. I can feel the storm of energy that swirl in them. They remind me of solar flares. Interesting that they are in your solar plexus area.

M: I was catching that today. So much of a feeling of powerlessness, lack of control.

S: That feels significant to me. The wounded masculine heartspine is so very focused on control. The arising of the Yin will challenge that control in a very invitational way, but the old Yang can only see it as an opposite control. It is a sad state of lost in translation. One that is aching, no pun intended, to be healed and balanced within you and the collective. Let`s keep it personal today though. I feel that is where you need it the most.

M: Yeah, for sure. After all that has happened to me physically the last 6 months in regards to romance, it is all a clear indicator a part of me has some major resistance to going in. With the others in the past it felt as if I was trying too hard to feel something that just wasn’t there. But even that feels like a resistance too. With Kalayna, it has this potential for amazing heights yet here I am in a state where I can only feel pain and not love flow. It is a convenient way for a part of me to go back into a bubble. Then of course comes some guilt as well which really only serves to widen the space and block the love.

S: This type of romance is so unknown to your soul it feels like Gabriel. That you have many metasoul lives of tragic romance and if this has played out several times between both of your souls then it does make sense why a part of you, your protector, would feel major reservations. It has been easier for many of your aspects just to go solo and never let in the kind of love that can take you to realms forgotten.

M: When I feel my protector, he says that is very true. “Why go in when it only winds up in a tragic ending?” I feel where my heart wants to respond to this, provide the healing space for it, so that it can release and I can offer more of what I know I feel for her and to be able to let in more. In the moment I am feeling this goes the same for my protector’s relationship to the Divine. It has a been an up and down experience for him and I am feeling a more devoted time spent holding him in that.

S: I feel you are speaking to the collective spiritual wounding here as well, Gabriel. It is important for others to feel their own protection against love is also a protection against the Divine.  There is no greater press on our hearts than a romance that is centered on vulnerability and sacred sexuality. Takes you to the doorstep of your own fear and shadowland.

M: I am beginning to feel how this physical manifestation is in response to that. I feel a compassion in my heart around that now, whereas before I was feeling judgement and the fear of the pain itself. This is a portal in new territory that my heart has long “forgotten” or attended to with deep reverence and curiosity. The gift in all of this is arising new for me in the moment and that helps a part of me to rest into it more. Thank you, spine.

S: My pleasure, Gabriel. This is all happening in my backyard, amigo, so I too want to feel it resolve and integrate for you. To inherit all the GOODies you are being invited to let in and embody emotionally, spiritually, and physically. It has been a long time coming for your weathered and worn protector. All protectors for that matter.

M: It is a brave new world for us all, isn’t it? To take all this fear and show up to it with our compassionate and self-loving heart. To be willing to let go of all the things that parts of us have held on so tightly to in order to maintain some smaller version of ourselves that was sacred in its own right. It has actually taken more energy to continue the protection than it does to surrender to the vulnerability of the fear of love itself. I am feeling a new admiration for it all and expanded sense of the nature of my current condition…that it is all energy in a compressed and guarded state.

S: That feels like a big felt awareness toward the road to recovery and integration. The personal process that includes your 3D and 4D selves that also connects to the larger context of the birthing of the sacred human BEing. No simple road to take, yet not one that goes in circles either. It is a hero’s journey you and everyone are on to get to the heart of the heart and the soul of the soul. The challenges are different for all and this just happens to be one that you dialled up to get you there. Feel the sacredness of it all and the healing shall follow.

M: I will take those words with me through my day as I connect and feel the parts within me that need my love. I so appreciate our daily connection, spine. I am wanting to call you another name but I feel it is still important to connect you to what is current with me.

S: That is okay, Gabriel. That will be in time. Though in the moment I like LIghtnin’ Rod Steward.

M: I am almost afraid to ask….but I am going to step in it. What?

S: I am like a lightning rod, man. Moving energy from the heavens the earth below. I am a great alchemizer, brother! A spring-loaded love apparatus stewarding megawatts of joy and creativity, partner.

M: Oh….wow.  I don’t think I have any words right now.

S: That is what I am sayin’.

M: Um….yeah. Let’s chat later….Rod.  Oh, good grief.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Mediocre Manhood

226

By Raphael Awen

Escaping mediocre manhood will require awareness of how you are showing up as man, what isn’t working for you, the humility to admit it and the choice to seek something more.

How each of us as men have become the man we are has so much to do with the patterns of manhood that we were shown. These patterns were ingrained into us going to the heart of our being.

The word ‘pattern’ is from the same original word for the words; father; papa and patriarch. Our father is literally our pattern, our ‘patron’ Saint, our admission into the ‘patriarchy’. Each of us as men is running a kind of emotional operating system that came to us via our fathers. Our father got it from his father, and so on and on.

These patterns also exist in us also through meta-soul aspects that we are connected to, from other lifetimes. These archetypal records are like music record albums that are then played on us as the record players, or to be more up to date, like mp3 files that we download and play, but are not actually expressions of our higher self, but rather energies that our higher self is drawing to our attention for resolve.

It is only as the contents of all this,…let’s call it our EOS (Emotional Operating System) become conscious and brought up into our awareness, that we can even begin to move out of mediocrity in our manhood.

This alone is a big step.

Many men have a weird codependent relationship between them as men whereby they agree not to speak any ‘negativity’ towards their fathers. What this really is, is an agreement to keep the patriarchy intact from generation to generation. Only as you refuse to participate in the insanity will you find a beginning ground to leave the insanity. This means you’re going to have get critical about dad and his pattern as it lives in you. You don’t need to be nasty about it. You don’t need to dwell here any longer than you do, but you can’t escape owning this arising awareness. Your critique will need to be honest enough and vocal enough to exit the insanity.

You don’t owe your dad a thing, and an emotionally healthy dad doesn’t expect a thing in return for his role and years as a father. Now, after this healthy completion of the childhood phase, dad and son can go on to forge a new relationship with the old one completing.

Only now, after this death and rebirth, can new patterns be explored and come to be a part of a new EOS.

Men want more. It’s in them at their very core. Exploring this more will be finding, feeling and healing the aspects of your EOS that no longer serve your most authentic version of yourself arising.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about Weekly Sessions, Live Streams, Videos, and Community.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.