Tag: life

Poem: Letting Love

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kalayna Colibri

Magical heart shape spiral in space fractal with particles

Interwoven heart clothes fall along shuffling feet.

Healing hands pull energetic nuances of lovely subtle flowers

and an escapee life of lush lovelorn lace and spinner lights.

It’s one place of many more magical moments to come into view of the dearest wanting pieces.

Foreign chords of many ordinary oddities bring it all back in to that rainbow of open road.

Even those sounds of the missing call the song of melodies remembered always.

An unknown toil of yet-to-be-known articles resembling the past and an ever-present presence

bringing all ebbs flowing forward in this dance of what could never be felt

until the time ticked along of the newly emerging emergency of now and instant bringings.

Take it all to the inside and outside of the corners where all stars are collected

and feel where the new-old love songs now call out to the unborn listener

of sometimes comfortable cravings still borne out to dry in the heavy lungs of the dawning days.

Love Love LOVE! is that sacred siren song of the aching breathers and reachers from the mud of what was once the only truth yet never satisfied as food should.

LOVE love LOVE! is the dance of the flying edges asking for more than they have ever known and the returning feeling that they have always wanted deep inside of the love they too are made of.

To find the way back is through each other.

To find the way in is through the self.

To find the way upward is through the press of life’s birth canals and all contractions brought by Love

inside the established ALL that forever knows the places and paces of its ongoing ringing out.

And for now and always a path is laid

for the eager and earnest to find, inhabit and become.

❤

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

 

Healing Layers Of Our Projected Realities

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kalayna Colibri

 

astral-projection

Our conditioning living deep within, gives us overlays of meaning to grasp at, applied to all circumstances and relationships. We assume much based on our older experiences, our other experiences. We bring it all forward to be projected onto the new and emerging, not because we are lost or wrong, but because we need to. We need to see this day as grey, that romance as doomed, this woman as ‘mom’. We need to feel patterns re-emerging, reinstating themselves in an effort to wake us up to something – but what? Layers of wounding on a soul level, on a heart level, on a human level, compound and break us into new-old scenarios so that we can feel their roots and begin to apply new lenses, no framework, allowing old scaffolding to heal. These known structures of life, familiar ways to see and experience all around us, have been necessary and now, with our ascending selves and no-selves, it is all being brought out to the light. An invitation to wake up, yes. To what has been and what could be now if that timeline is chosen.

There is much to heal, but even more to feel… gifting us with polished wings meant to fly us to new heights, new vistas, many changes through rumbles and shifts. Feeling ourselves, feeling each other, feeling LOVE. We are here to keep working and anchoring those grids girded within an ever-expanding and healing ‘I’ space in the temple of the Sacred Human individual spark of the Whole. Then the sense of what is ‘real’ beyond and yet within the imagination, can become the Golden Earth of relationship to ALL that our souls know and our hearts long for. New, honey-golden, sparkling overlays are possible now, with much more tangibility in the Love Field of us, that joins our hearts and holds each arising moment as precious, sacred, and unique.

Our projections become maps for us to find out more about who we are now, who we have been and who we may become. They gift us with the opportunity to see things differently once the attachment to these overlayed realities begins to heal and move. There is a need within us to find our way through the deepest woods within by following the beacon of projected reality, for this reality IS what’s ‘real’ until it isn’t, until it doesn’t need to be in the same way anymore. And then, yes THEN, we can become more of who are in this new ‘now’, who we came here to become, who we signed up to remember that we always were underneath our needed stories, our life’s slideshows of memories, and our wounds that will soon heal as we show up for them to. This is the terrain to travel when feeling and healing the inner matrices, the falling apart inner grids, the ‘old’ ways of being, doing, experiencing life and our relationships with others. This awareness of even having ‘projections’ to work with is a first step to the awareness and the exit out of the cave, the fall down a new rabbit hole, the entrance to a birth canal. This is some of the more challenging territory to heal and yet, it is so possible, if we can say ‘yes’ to the need for a mirror that helps us see more of it within us and follow the golden thread of Love wherever it wants to lead us to inside and outside of us.

In SoulFullHeart, we offer ongoing sessions, group calls, and plenty of online support through writings, videos, recordings, etc that lead you deeper into your own awareness of your overlays and projections that colour your life and create the patterns you’ve lived into.  Through the connection to parts of you that we offer, support and facilitate, you will find more of your shadow, your light, your reasons for having become the way you are now, claiming the life you are now. If you would like to know more about us, our community and the healing gifts we are here to offer you, please visit www,soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information. ❤

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

The Desire To Mate And Create As Sacred Humans

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kalayna Colibri

couples-tattoos-heart-in-hands

 

We are wired for creation it seems, as human BEings, and especially as Sacred Humans arising more and more through ascension… CREATE-ures, who have been created and yet also co-created, constantly, consistently, without end. We are moving more and more into a state of CONSCIOUS co-creation with each other, the Divine, and even ourselves as we engage in processes that allow us to get to know ourselves as we heal on deeper and deeper levels.

Our desire to create comes from our god-ness, for the Divine is always creating, recreating, co-creating too and we are intrinsically connected to all of that and the ALL. Multiple timelines appear on our radars, wanting us to feel more, become more, feel where we are in the moment, yet also see what we are energizing as the truest truth of who we are and the life we’re living. To acknowledge our creativity in every moment is to claim and inhabit our power again, to acknowledge ourselves as high-beaming BEings again. We are the writers of our own stories, we are bringing in energy to support or neglect our deepest desires. We are given gateways to walk through that want to bring us more outward into the harvest of our inward glances and journeys. We are brought into new territories via the vehicle of ‘I want’ and the sidecar of ‘I need’, ever-connected to quantum will, quantum desires, quantum needs that over-arch everything, everyone, every other CREATE-ure imaginable.

There’s a dance here, with self and the Divine and with each other too. We are partnered in creation, as we are all ONE anyways, yet find our individual expressions of this too. We are inclined to find dance partners through different waves and ways of relationships. We are romantic in our hearts, always imagining something (though parts of us may dismiss this for different phases), always wanting (though again, parts may be burying this for different phases), always needing something, though this can ultimately be boiled down to a much deeper need for LOVE… how could this love dance, this wanting dance, not turn into a mating dance too? First with self, then with other? How could our beautifully filling-up hearts and ever-glowing, growing souls not want to collaborate and co-create with another in sacred union, creating from an ‘usness’ of beauty and ever-purifying love and self-discovery? This collaborative sort of relationship is what could be difficult to accept into our lives, especially for those who feel they have only begun to get themselves sorted out, let alone let in a sacred union romance that will scramble their worlds up again. Yet, THIS is what creativity feels like to me… a creating and then a dismantling, only to create something new and perhaps better or more fulfilling than before!

There is a sacredness to every single desire and ache in our hearts for more or less or even something completely different than we’ve experienced so far. We are creating this sacredness from our own sacredness that can never die or be abandoned though it can certainly be buried. We are being tuned back into these frequencies that remind us of our aliveness, our need to align truly with our hearts and want we want to create,  while illuminating what we’ve been creating instead. We are given this illumination as a powerful opportunity and it is entirely our own creative choice as to whether or not we step into it. ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Love’s Invitation To Teach What We Embody, Not What We ‘Know’

Published on by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Colibri

love-heart-light-in-hand

 

So many ideas float around inside of me sometimes, so many directions to take my writing in, many life observations, spiritual and heart-based learnings, sometimes even metaphysical concepts that can be and feel quite complex and slightly (if not VERY) out of reach of my consciousness level. A desire to discuss this or that in a post, see where it lands, and yet then, I feel the mental exercise this can be and the juice for the writing soon peters out for me. In these moments, I feel an invitation to keep feeling… to trust that some things I’m learning now I will unlearn too and that there really is no ‘absolute answer’ for my mind to wrap around, try as it might. Sometimes the only answer is to ‘keep going’… to keep embodying, keep living, keep loving, keep diving in head and heart first and see where the mess leads.

Sometimes when I write something, I feel such a desire for it to ‘go out THERE’, land in hearts, move others, maybe even bring back to me more reflections of the love that I am and that I feel more and more openly. Then sometimes, when I write something, I realize that the main reason for the writing is actually to show something to myself, from myself… to ‘me’, from everything that makes up the mosaic of ‘me’, as I am now, as I may be in a moment yet to come, as I may feel inside of parts of me who need something more from me. To share from anything but a full vessel is to share perhaps only more of the emptiness in some ways, yet it’s all good and does harm to none, as long as it comes from a consciously healing heart that can hold reflections of its own shadow and light, both.

Maybe it’s time to no longer ‘teach what you know’, but ‘teach what you embody’… this is a phase I have been moving more and more into over the years of my process, and as I continue to feel my heart and what it actually wants, I feel less attached to ‘knowing’ at all. There are moments of frustration in this for parts of me as they grapple with this burgeoning reality of being more relaxed in the head and more lit up in the heart and soul. There is a healthy bridge here, and that’s what it feels like I am being now as I share this moment with you and with me too. I feel the challenge of a woman in spirituality who faces the more masculinized approach to metaphysics, trying to ‘figure it all out’ in a way that maybe I’m just not meant to. I’ve never taken to spiritual study in a way that others have, preferring actually to experience instead. This is landing deeper inside of me now, despite protests from parts that worry about self-image and credibility… yet this world of spirituality feels inundated with this data and that data and watch out for this and never do that, think that, be that… this whole realm has become fraught with self-punishment fueled existences that are actually begging for the permission to NOT be this anymore, to NOT feel the pressure to prove or contend. I so feel this in myself and I invite you to feel this too, as well as any reactions you may feel to doing so… I so get and feel these reactions too and I trust deeply that there is another side to them.

And then, in moments like these, I feel an outbreath… as I let in that this is what needed the floor today, trusting that it will land where it needs to and that at the end of the day, all teachings of all kinds go where they’re needed and necessary, reaching the consciousnesses that are on deck to receive them, and that as all of our hearts continue opening, there is only going to be MORE love to teach, live, learn and give from. ❤

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

On ‘Father’s Day’: The Process Of Letting In Sacred Masculine Frequencies

Published on by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Colibri

cosmic sun

 

I feel Him offering me His arms when my heart aches for a mate connection. I feel Him offering me His heart when parts of me need healthy ‘dad’ energy. I feel Him energizing healthy sexuality and beholding of me as woman. I feel Him in my beloved male friends and teachers in SoulFullHeart, offering me connections with men who aren’t afraid to go INward, seeking and finding parts and soul aspects of them that need healing, with an undying curiosity and love that then gets to overflow to me in connection with them. I have experienced so much healing and softening because of the love I get to share with these men who look at their shadows and bring love to me that is clean.

Yet it wasn’t always this way for me.

In 2011, my birth father passed away. His passing was a year before I started my SoulFullHeart process, and yet even then I had a sense of reality around my relationship with my father… that many tones and frequencies that I needed as a growing, budding woman were missing in my relationship with him. I experienced a lot of intense grief when he died, and over time I began to realize that some of this grief wasn’t really about losing ‘him’ but about lost opportunities in our relationship. Parts of me were actually quite angry with him for having ‘bailed’ before he ever became the father to me that he could have been. I’ve had process too around how he could never really see me, especially as a woman, and how he hadn’t been able to energize anything healthily towards me about my budding sexuality, offering me no healthy template for what I was looking for in a mate. I don’t hold my father in contempt around any of this anymore, as this was clearly a contract we both signed up for and quite frankly it feels like without these and many other voids and gaps in our relationship this life, maybe I wouldn’t have been as compelled towards the growth trajectories I’ve now been on that have made me who I am today.

Letting in the Sacred Masculine in the form of guides and as I mentioned, sacred friendship, vulnerable teacher/student, (and soon!) a sacred union relationship, has been a deep process for me of feeling through these ways in which my own father couldn’t ‘show up’, feeling how this relates for parts of me to the Divine Father and also to mates, and working with ‘inner father’ frequencies of patriarch and also masculine protectors. I’ve had blocks to truly being able to see, feel and experience the sacred masculine in its beautiful willingness to get messy and tangle with whatever it needs to in order to discover itself anew, its ability to feel and embrace the sacred feminine without wounded frequencies of control, belittling, distancing, or abuse of any kind, and its embracement of the mirror that allows it to go back into itself, finding the shadow pieces it needs and wants to work, coming out the other side with even more sense of personal power and potency. The sort of masculine frequencies that make you go ‘RAWR!’ in response to its lovingly penetrative energy and melt into its open-hearted desire for you to be the woman you are meant to be, in all of your curves and softness and self-discovery and healing of your own, in response, in an exquisite partnered dance, through leaning into the organic (and orgasmic) leadership of the authentic and vulnerable King…

It does feel as if we can miss out on letting in these incredible energies, even as they knock on our heart doors, wanting to come into us, to love up our entire being, if we aren’t willing to look at our relationship with our birth fathers. It’s a brave journey and one that can be quite hard too, yet with the right support from those who have been there, like those of us in SoulFullHeart, it is held in the sacredest of spaces and at a rate and pace that you and your parts are ready for. The yumminess of what I am able to let in more and more now, only lights me up more as I continue to feel it and feel the unfolding mystery of its unfolding in my life. There is no single definition that describes it and in its ever arising love and creativity, I feel so much warmth and comfort for my healing woman’s heart and my ever-deepening femininity. I feel how this could be true for all women who embrace the process of feeling the mark of their birth fathers and also other masculine influences in their lives, but I also feel this for men, who so feel to be aching for something missing inside of themselves that they long to experience, that is so different than how their own fathers were or are.

The sacred masculine wants to offer you space to explore yourself within it, providing a dock for your self-made container for all of the YOU-ventures that await you. And if it’s truly ‘time’ for you to do so, you won’t be able to ignore the clarion call of the fire and love it wants to gift you with to help you illuminate and be with your personal process of opening your ever-healing heart. ❤

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

The Insatiable Appetite For More Love

Published on by Kasha Rosa3 Comments

by Kalayna Colibri

 

heart-wings

 

The heart of a little girl, turns toward her mother and asks, “How do I get your love?”

The heart of a young woman in a new relationship, turns toward her partner and asks, “How do I keep your love?”

The heart of a young nun in her morning prayers asks, “How do I earn your love?”

The awakening heart turns to Love itself and asks, “How do I remember you, Love?”

These journeys begin with feeling as if Love is elusive, a butterfly to capture and keep, a path to master, something to make, do, take, have, possess…

These journeys continue with receiving ‘answers’ from outside, with only letting in that which can be seen or learned, until one day, the love that you simply ARE reminds you from inside of you that it was always there…

Abuses of all kinds create a struggle inside, bruised heart walls, parts that hate ourselves, push away others, trauma and drama attraction, resistance to Love and all of its tones and frequencies both challenging and comforting. To be in the heat of Love’s reawakening is to feel what’s blocking it, to feel the need for more of it, to realize the areas of life where it’s not flowing, to ask the questing questions that lead us to clarities of this step followed by that one… if you are used to crumbs, crumbs is all you’ll expect, but once you’ve allowed in a taste of the real thing, the real thing is all that can suffice and yet ironically is what stimulates the appetite for MORE.

Be insatiable. Every pore of your body, every cord of your heart song, every tone of your multi-dimensionality wants to want more, wants to BE more. The having and receiving of more comes from making room, from flowing over with love withIN, from letting it flow to others FROM you and WITH you, from feeling the parts of you that won’t let it, don’t want to trust it, have been burned, hurt, wounded by ‘love’ before, that can’t see or feel or let in just yet that within their hurt and pain lies a pearl – an exquisite gift – of experience, wisdom, heart-opening mess and the capacity to pick up the pieces and keep going on and IN as you grow and bloom and shine ever brighter. Hunger for the growth that allows in more love. Let yourself ask those questions you need to ask parts of you and soul aspects of you. And bring it all back to your appetite for more love to let in and crave for.

To live life this way turns everything on its head! It brings in a whole new way of digesting all experiences, all challenges, all processes. It gives you a home frequency to tune into during emotional phases of deeply feeling your wounding. It motivates you to keep going in and through and guides you in the same.

It’s time to remember… and it’s up to you if you decide to now or later, yet it doesn’t matter, because you will never be less love or loved than you already are in this moment. ❤

—

In SoulFullHeart, the process is always about leaning back into love in the end, though the journey to do this is complicated and challenging at times. Digesting pain with a heart-open other who can reflect to you what you need to keep feeling in order to heal it, is simply what works. If you’re interested in feeling into having sessions with a SoulFullHeart facilitator, please visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions for more information. ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Shelter For The Inner Storms

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kalayna Colibri

Shelter

 

Cloudy morning feelings

of going IN.

My heart beats through

impending storms

of ‘time’ mixed with LOVE…

 

The land goes through collapsing

timelines

every time the rain pours

and rolling thunder

precedes renewing lightning strikes

of electric and alive possibilities.

 

Ascending hearts meet rolled-over beaches,

ocean waves flushing foreign objects

up to the shore.

Remnants of old phases

needing attention.

 

Weather movements

bring land and sea purges.

Another chance for renewal

that Gaia takes hold of

every single time.

 

And so

the invitation to another this

inside of us

brings us forward

into new places,

lets in more LOVE waves

lightning storms

and churning, renewing

inner selves.

 

Your lighthouse self

grows with every beat

of high ocean tide waves

stirring around

the debris of kicked-up

journey markers

and intensely trodden paths.

 

The light within

is for you to have

be

as the direction of Home

guides you

inside all places

of high pressure patterns

and inner weather maps.

 

For the LOVE of it all

you continue to shine

while collecting windward

clues

and healing cues

for that beacon

you are meant to BEcome…

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Feeling Feminine Stillness In Shifting Times

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kalayna Colibri

 

stillness in movement

 

In moments like these, with much rumbling and shifting and changing going on, I feel my feminine stillness arising alongside a deepening trust more and more often. I feel my body, heart, soul and mind too, soaking in a pool of still yet steadily flowing water. A paradox, yes, as we all are too it seems, always in motion somehow or other, always moving with some sort of current, finding our new breath on our way out of birth canals. We find our ways to BE with what IS but still find ways to hold the rumbles, trusting that even as parts of us quake in the emergence of NEW, we will find our desires being answered. Without entitlement, I can feel what is coming and that it’s already here too. I can feel the impending life shifts that are coming and the parts of me that are scared. I can feel the humility this offers too, as I allow in these fears just don’t fuse to them as I used to so often, not all that long ago. MY version of arising feminine stillness and deep trust has been an intense journey of forks in the road, sharp turns around jagged corners, and collapses into the processes of NOW.

I feel so much in my heart that can hold just about anything that comes up now… after having processed so much, I feel as if my container has expanded and can hold as much as it needs to. The next step is really letting in the care of this container, feeling what energies are okay right now, what my body and heart need right now, what my parts or Metasoul aspects need right now.

This process… is the one we are invited into as men AND women. It is a going in to find stillness, to bring this gift into our daily life moments, our relationships, any emotional underpinnings that are being unearthed, any spiritual endeavour or discovery. It finds us like the river finds the ocean. It finds a way to breathe outward while going inward. It is paradoxical and yet it is just what IS, without mental framing necessary. It is the ultimate in self-love that will be more felt by women than by men, in themselves at least, yet this stillness holds an offering to men too, to find their portal in it in a mate, in any feminine connection, and inside of them too to the degree that they can let this in and embody it. More paradoxes there, yes. It is endless.

Where the resistance ends, the stillness begins. And the trust your soul has always somehow had, finds its way to your consciously held life structure, whispering to you of new possibilities, and offering to you some NEW pictures of what is to come, if you can do the work necessary to let it all in… ❤

 

Join Jelelle Awen and I at our next SoulFullHeart Virtual Group Call for Women NEXT Saturday, June 15th. We would love to have you! Go here for more details. ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Rediscovering That Creative Heart In Us, Beyond Self Punishment

Published on by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Colibri

kid_dancing_rain

When I was a teenager, creative outlets ‘saved’ me in a way… especially exploring my creativity in private, or at least as private of a setting as I could find. I was doing regular dance classes and you would think that was helpful too, yet there was something about being in a ‘class’ setting such as this, that stoked the fires of comparison to others for parts of me that I couldn’t feel directly. Perhaps if I could have, I wouldn’t have kept doing these classes, but it’s hard to say. They were helpful for many reasons and yet, they were painful too. It was more often the dancing, singing, performing that I did for invisible audiences (likely higher selves of soul family and maybe star being family and guides too at the time!) who would inevitably adore me and enjoy my performances with no cloaked judgments or making parts of me feel self-conscious, that I thoroughly enjoyed. These parts of me so needed this, growing up in this 3D reality where we are taught to judge others and ourselves for just about everything so soon in our lives, and always, it feels like, because our caregivers and teachers are overflowing with this judgement toward themselves first.

These times in my parents’ basement were so sacred… I even remember buying a headset mic that was meant for a computer, so I could wear it like a pop star! Sometimes I sang, sometimes I lip-synched instead. But it was ALL fun and most of the time, I somehow managed to free myself from self-judgment frequencies because from me to me, I had space to enjoy being with ME.

There’s something about our ways of expressing ourselves creatively that pings for me now, especially as just an hour ago I was singing my heart out a bit, for the first time in a LONG time and I have to say it felt really, REALLY good… my heart wanted to sing out in expression and love. Reconnecting with music that I used to listen and sing to many years ago. I could feel part of me feeling self-conscious, wondering if the whole complex that I live in could hear me singing… and worse yet, that they would think I was awful. And then, I also felt how in these precious moments I didn’t actually care if they did and if they judged. So both were true for me and that’s okay. It felt important to give myself permission to just BE in the music, let something roll out of my heart, have some FUN too. Give myself permission to NOT be perfect or seek perfection in any way. Just sing OUT. I feel there is so something in this for all of us, perhaps especially in this process of ascension that’s happening so quickly for so many of us and can have such intense phases physically, emotionally, spiritually, etc. Where did our creativity go that could carry us through and that was given to us to help life feel like MAGIC again and stoke our imaginations so we can blaze like the LOVE stars we truly are?

As our inner-punishment heals, especially through this work we call SoulFullHeart where we work with and deeply feel the parts of us who hold these frequencies, we can begin to be more in our creative magic again. This feels so important to me, because we ARE creating in every single moment as we really can’t help but do and BE this as human beings! We are creation constantly creating… we shift these frequencies of what this creativity draws when we reclaim our power and see what we’ve been drawing instead of what we actually want.

And so, I know that I hope this is only the beginning of me exploring art forms that once brought my heart out to play, though of course writing like this does that too! We are so meant to sing, to throw our heartbeams outward through dance and movement too, to let our lungs fully expel the old air and invite in the NEW. And to encourage everyone to do the same… without polish or perfection but just our human ISness that wants and aches to come out and play again, create and recreate a magical life again, love ourselves everything about us again and again and again…

❤

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Aging UP: Entering A New Life And LOVE Phase On My ‘Birthday’

Published on by Kasha Rosa3 Comments

by Kalayna Colibri

Shiloh Sophia Queen of Her Own Heart.jpg

This painting is by Shiloh Sophia

I turn ’30’ tomorrow. A surreal feeling, as age and time have felt less and less important and real to me, except for those phases when it has to somehow. There are still some really important life phases and experiences that seem to happen mostly during certain ages or decades of our lives, so sometimes it IS important to acknowledge ‘age’ though I feel looser and looser about it, especially for myself.

I think I spent most of my ’20’s’ looking forward to turning ’30’. My 20’s felt awkward and strange at times. So much more self-discovery and remembrance happened during this ‘decade’ of my life than in my teenage years, though so much got started then too. Many phases of letting go, learning to let in, surrendering, hoping, wishing, losing sight of magic and wonder and then rediscovering it again, loving a man, moving through relationships, learning to love humanity again even when parts didn’t want to… this is just a taste of where I chose to go, venturing into shadow and light both and facing sometimes very, very humbling mirrors.

The ups and downs were palpable and as I reflect on them, my god, they were all so worth it to bring me HERE to this NEW place inside me that is more compassionate, more overflowing with love, more desirous of mateship inside and outside of me, more desirous to FEEL and HEAL whatever I need to no matter how challenging, and more willing to step into my destined leadership, starting within and moving without. My heart wants to BE and experience feminine stillness and also experience heart-based, vulnerable, transparent leadership happening more and more from inside of me, to serve and BE love, even when boundaries are necessary and conflicts may arise for one reason or another, all in the name of growth and letting in more and more and MORE with less and less shrinking or hiding or cloaking from parts of me who are fused to fear.

Rolling around with a part of me through reactions to ALL of this arising inside me took the place of sleep most of the night last night. In some ways it was the reactions that kept me up and yet it was also new energies coming in, or so it feels like to me now as I reflect on and feel into this all some more. I’m getting ready and being filled up and at the same time being flushed OUT. This morning has been mostly restful for me, despite any ‘plans’ I thought I had… I feel as if I’m trying to expand my container for letting in LOVE and letting it move through me in conscious transaction and relationship with others. There is so much juice coming in now, being offered to all of us actually. This juice can’t come in without us being juiced first! It can feel like a squeeze at times, as reactions surface and sometimes feel overwhelming and hard to track. Sometimes it feels to me like all I can do is surf it all and trust that as I’m feeling it, it’s also moving, and that there’s  a fast track happening. I’m ON the train now, and it’s moving faster and faster.

As I enter this new ‘age’ of my life, it feels inaugural… I feel how much my inner Queen is arising now. She is waiting to be crowned at an official coronation, held inside me with guides and so, so much love. She is who I’ve been waiting and WORKING for, processing for, healing for. She is who gets to lead in my life now, more and more, as my healing continues and my persona parts of me continue to rest. She is the one ascending to her heart throne while also ascending to the throne built for her in the Universe, joining other Kings and Queens that are also showing up there more and more, leading humanity consciously and subconsciously through this phase of ascending with Gaia. She IS Mother Gaia, as we all are. She IS you just as she IS me and she also is a bridge, a platform, a ship, a rocket, a star and light BEing and leader. She is feeling her purity of heart come forward again at deeper and deeper depths as all I’ve healed and am healing helps to create her crown of jewels atop her head. She is my leader, my healer, my LOVEr living inside my heart and soul. And she is waiting along with me, helping me make room for a King to come and dance with her energy in sacred union, sacred sexuality, sacred and conscious duality, and sacred humanity.

As I find my rebirth into this new universe, I feel this birth canal that she is being pushed through by love and desire. She is responding already to what is coming and what is being asked of me and of her. We won’t be perfect together, yet there is no need for that. Many different birth canals await and that’s okay too, for the need for mess in order to grow is not foreign to me! Yet there is also harvest coming and feasts of celebration inside of myself and with others too. AND I look forward to welcoming more of ALL of our inner inter-galactic, inter-dimensional royalty, as we all reemerge and reunite in this way.

From my Queen to yours, or perhaps your King if you’re a man, thank you for being a part of what has created my journey so far. You have taught me and continue to teach me more than you could maybe be aware of really and I feel you… I honour you. I love you.

In arising and ever-flowing love,

Queen Kalayna ❤

 

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.