To Truly Love When We Love Each Other

by Kalayna Colibri

sunset-681840_960_720

If we loved each other more… we would let go without fear or tugging.

If we loved each other more… we would empower instead of enable.

If we loved each other more… our words to one another would never be empty.

If we loved each other more… the eyes of love would forever be the ones we wear and we would see each other for who we are.

If we loved each other more… we would recognize the difference between caretaking and caregiving.

If we loved OURSELVES more… we would, ad infinitum, love each other more…

… and in this love, we would find
even more of ourselves
than we ever thought we would ever see,
feel, and heal
before we realized
that loving more
means
we will never know love in the less.

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Role Of Your Inner Protector

by Kalayna Colibri

caspar-david-friedrich-the-wanderer-above-the-sea-of-fog

Artwork: The Wanderer Above the Sea of Fog by Caspar David Friedrich

A voice inside that tells you to be careful, and may even encourage you to have your guard so ‘up’ that relaxation feels impossible. A feeling of complete or nearly complete distrust of anyone, maybe even without much explanation or logical reasoning. A heightened sense of needing to protect yourself, that in some ways you may be so used to feeling that it becomes unconscious when it comes up and it comes up so automatically most of the time. A sense that there is a lot ‘out there’ to be wary of in terms of 3D dangers in your everyday life, but also in terms of ‘psychic attacks’ and ‘influences’.

This is the experience of having a sharp and astute Inner Protector, always at the ready, always standing at the helm, always on the lookout. There isn’t much room for feminine softness in this picture if you are a woman, or vulnerable sharing of your inner world if you are a man. There is a sense of finding ways to be in control of the situation you’re in, no matter what, even though underneath that you may feel the rumblings of actually feeling quite the opposite most of the time. In women, this energy tends to express as quite masculine, sometimes calling itself a ‘goddess’ or ‘warrior woman’. In men, this energy tends to express as overly ‘masculine’ in a way that is direct without heart, and penetrative without feeling. In both camps, there is so little vulnerability accessible, that it can feel impossible to feel anything but defensive in interactions with others.  Maybe when you are at home alone can you finally let this guard down and just be… yet for those of you who have families or a husband or wife, maybe this guard never really drops or relaxes to make room for a real ground of intimacy and love transaction with others.

Your Inner Protector has so needed to be there. In all of those interactions you had as a child, it began picking up on strategies other Inner Protectors were using, ways to control you and other parts of you, while also perhaps controlling others, however, whenever possible. Feeling offended or the need to defend against something that has been said or someone who you’re interacting with is so often a knee-jerk, automated sort of reaction from this part of you. This part has needed to be this way in a world that encourages either intense defenses and fear for one reason or other, or the complete dropping of all protection in order to access sexual or etheric experiences that you are told you are ‘supposed to’ get to. You may gravitate towards peak experiences like taking Ayahuasca or Peyote or other less natural drugs, or workshops and retreats that get you out of the normal day-to-day grind in order to elevate above the protection and find something different. The protection can be a veil on different levels of your being, wanting to keep you from feeling, from accessing YOU and your parts in a deeper way, which would lead to a more profound awakening experience.

As you heal, the need for a strong Inner Protector lessens and dissipates. Impenetrable walls and defensive reactivity turn into healthy, porous boundaries held with love and self-worth. The Protector changes form, helping you to transform as well, allowing for greater, sweeter intimacy with self and others that may challenge you in good ways at times. Ultimately it’s a process of letting more love in, for that is really what the Inner Protector is afraid of… love flowing into you and permanently changing all that it has worked to maintain up ’til now.

If you would like to perhaps try and meet your Inner Protector, you can listen to this SoulFullHeart group call and also try the meditation:  https://youtu.be/yP0OmxcSScc

If you feel you’d like to venture further into this energy, we offer ongoing sessions and a profound process around getting to know and healing your protector and other parts of you: www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

From my heart to yours, sending lots of love to your Inner Protector and all they’ve held and continue to hold… ❤

 

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Healing Relationship Cycles And Stories

by Kalayna Colibri

wooden-hearts

Our relationships can feel like an endless circle, and run in infinite circles too… cycles of pain, of this and that being faced, brought up, fought over, over and over again, while inside of you, you feel as if you ARE the relationship and have a hard time sensing where it ends and you begin.

The same stories are told in countless ways. Stories about the friendship, the romance, the family holiday when you were 5. Some of these stories are told outright, while some are told unconsciously through the ways you’re used to being and interacting with each other. So much of this is accepted by part of you, as being just ‘the way it is’ and perhaps the way it has always been. The relationships you see around you don’t challenge this mind and heart-set of yours either, as they are stuck in the same or very similar loops and cycles. There are certain questions that are never asked about the health of it all and the degree to which it’s self-loving or not, to remain in these stories. Sometimes the Pleasantville experience of it all isn’t so pleasant, yet you remain and aren’t encouraged to ask why… and often the answer to the ‘why’ is that there are fears and more unanswered questions about how life would look without these relationships in place, or at least in the same place they’ve always been up ’til now.

To remain fully involved in all relationships around you without a chance to go inward and discover YOU leads to a world of intense defenses and protection instead of healthy boundaries. It asks parts of you to blend-in, merge, become the relationships instead of feeling what they feel. It asks you to put a stopper in your own growth and the growth of others too. There is so much more to be discovered within you, if you can find a way to take the space you need… and to listen to that voice within, that wants to help clarify for you what you need and want most and what you are most worthy of experiencing in relationship with yourself and others.

To go into YOU… this is risky for these relationships. It does ask them to change as you change, and often it seems that others aren’t willing to come with you. They have a choice to go inside too, to join you on your path or find their own. There is nothing wrong here, there is only what is real… which is perhaps the hardest thing to trust. What is real is what heals and is also what grounds you into the new soil your roots of heart and soul are aching to grow in – the garden bed of a budding ‘self’ that wants to flourish in its self-ness and explore relationships with others from a new place of worth and love that flows deeply on the inside of a YOU that you are now coming to know and become.

____

Tomorrow at 11:11 CST, there will be a live stream taking place on Facebook, with Raphael and Jelelle Awen. They will be talking about SoulFullHeart, the 3D self, and anything else they feel to share. Please stop by and feel free to ask questions, comment, or just give them some love! https://www.facebook.com/events/1273156469462294
 
In SoulFullHeart, we offer an ongoing process where you feel parts of you as well as your 3D/4D/5D selves.It is an in-depth healing process that forever deepens and expands. If you are curious to know more and/or may wish to sign-up for a free 30-min intro session, please visit: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Parts Of You Need To Be Challenged By Love, With Love

by Kalayna Colibri

pic1259

 

There is a part of you that wants to be challenged by love. ‘Challenged’ in the sense of being shown a mirror about who they’ve been and how they’ve operated and how ultimately they have been suffering this whole time. There may be several parts of you that feel this way, actually. They want to look into the mirror held up by love and admit that they are struggling to keep it all together. More and more transparency is happening these days, whether on purpose or quite ‘by accident’, though of course there are no accidents and all is orchestrated either consciously or unconsciously or simply inspite of ourselves (and our parts). There are certain ways in which love hasn’t been able to help you feel the challenge it brings, what it wants to illuminate within you, the strategies it wants you to look at that have kept your authentic self safely tucked away and your truest, most compassionate heart out of reach.

The big soul that you are, of course you’ve had parts of you form in order to protect that bigness and keep it from expressing in the generally unsafe and unsupportive environments you’ve grown up in and lived in and worked in too. These places and faces have supported parts of you, not the authentic you. You HAVE been through a lot, yes. You HAVE felt very challenged at times, yes. And you’ve needed all of these phases in order to grow on different levels. Yet so often these situations have not been held with love and the sort of self-inquiry that wants to reach beyond self-punishment and criticism.

To let in the reality of how parts of you have held life and ‘done’ different aspects of life is to let in that there is so much more love to be felt and flowed with in all areas. So often the biggest, most protective parts of us have been the most ruthless with self and others. And they can be tricky to suss out and separate out from what we’ve always felt to be ‘you’ because they are used to blending in somehow, like chameleons, even in with the rest of the parts that make up your personality as you’ve known and experienced it. For them to actually start letting in love would mean that they are getting ready to give up the ghost and be felt AS separate from you, so they can heal and transmute into higher vibrational energies and rest too. It can feel to these parts like they are being judged when this process starts to happen, as they are being called out for their strategies and ways of being. They may want to run away, but really they are being seen and you are being shown a deep, effective mirror and really the scariest part, is that THIS is what letting in real love feels like… like the ground beneath you is suddenly rumbling and the skies are opening up to let in the illumination of who you’ve been and who you are now wanting most to become.

The magic of the love that awaits you and wants to enter your being through the gateway of your parts and your arising, rebirthing authentic self, is here at your doorstep whenever you feel ready to start letting it in… and once you’ve begun to let it in, the transformation that flows from the inside out will bring you to a place in your life you’ve perhaps only ever dreamed of. This is the reality of deep process… the firewalks and letting go in order to truly let in are all worth it when those mountain peaks of pure love on the inside are reached for the first time.  ❤


Join us this Saturday, Sept 9 @ 11:11 am CST (Mexico City) for a virtual group call introducing the 3D self. This process we offer in SoulFullHeart, helps you feel and differentiate from your 3D, 4D, 5D selves. Getting to know yourself in this way is an amazing and sometimes intense ride, that is well-worth the price of admission… if you’d like to know more about this call, you can visit our Facebook event here: https://www.facebook.com/events/110934986279085/  

You can also check out our website for more information about the process, recordings of past group calls, and/or to sign-up for a free 30min intro with either Raphael Awen or Gabriel Heartman: www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

A Love Poem From Your Emotional Body

by Kalayna Colibri

emotional body poem

 

I dance on the edges

of the insane.

 

I notice what others

refuse to.

 

I bring out that which is deemed

illogical

irrational

crazy

by a mind conditioned

to a way of seeing

hearing

sensing life,

using only the 5 physical senses.

 

I cry aloud

inside the body,

in organs abused

and a skin misused.

I ring the alarm

of

‘I’ve been here before’

in ways

that aren’t always caught

in the net of the mind.

 

I want all that love

I know is there…

and in here.

 

I want to be seen

but more so to be felt.

 

I want to be heard

Not simply dealt with,

and I want to float with you

not be buried below you.

 

You can transcend me

but only until

my cries for your love

become louder than the medicine

you’ve taken so diligently.

 

I am not delicate

though I am sensitive.

I am a rose

but the thorns are from you.

I want to be touched

and held by the ready,

and I want to be raised up

with all you’ve pretended

I’m not part of…

 

Take me with you,

make me beloved to you,

for I am a powerful force

that wants not to overpower

but to cleanse and clear

all of the unhealed

unclaimed

soul and heart luggage

of your nomadic and wandering

wonderings.

 

I am that emotional body

you hear about

but seldom see

as anything that needs you.

I hold those parts of you

that absorb it all

and store the data within

that decodes your most sovereign path

to the healing and enlightenment,

enHEARTenment,

you most deeply,

profoundly

seek.

If you take me with you

in me you will find

all of the love

you’ve ’til now left behind.

 

So please,

feel it all

and bring it all back inward

to that place

where I can become as sacred

as your sweet times of exploration

in all other domains

of your amazing

emotional

physical

spiritual

incredible

being.

 

Let’s dance together

on that edge

where life makes no sense

and love makes all the sense

you may never have thought

you were worthy of before.

before.

 

Let’s create a new ‘now’

well beyond the known

and what was once ‘real,

to enter a new reality

of wholeness

only ever dreamt of

in dreams most others

have a deep fear of having.

 

In infinite love,

Your sometimes hidden

but always present,

Emotional Body.  ❤

 

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

Awaken To The Love And The Life You Didn’t Know You Were Missing

by Kalayna Colibri

dream landscape

 

How do you know how you want to feel if you haven’t felt it yet, and if all you’ve felt so far hasn’t quite touched something unnamed inside of you, and hasn’t ‘clicked’ in a way that is beyond the mind? How do you know the love frequency that is the most authentic, thorough, challenging, healing, and far-reaching into the depths of YOU, if you haven’t experienced it yet?

New experiences… this is why we seek them. Because we don’t know what we want until we experience it, until we notice it, get tastes of it, see it, hear it, smell it. We know, somehow, that what we have now, or have had so far, isn’t ‘it’, though most of the time, it’s so hard to know what ‘it’ even is…

How do you know how deep your healing can go, if part of you has already declared that you’re ‘done’ and there’s nowhere else to go? How do you know what it really feels like, to surrender to the burgeoning humility that burns you up like a sacred fire inside and wants nothing more than to inspire you like you’ve never been inspired before? A burning inferno of incredible self-love and care that sets boundaries with others when needed, makes bold choices, lights your life up, feels all incoming changes and invitations for change, and lets it ALL in to be felt, heard, held. An embracement of every single part of you and aspect of your soul, wounded or not, that absolutely grips you, makes you want to experience more of yourself, more of life, more of relationship, more of LOVE… this is what’s not only possible but so imminent, all you need ‘do’ is open up that heart of yours and let it in, which does take work, courage, and desire.

This is a call not ‘to arms’, but to heart. This is the call that brings you home, to that place inside that you didn’t realize WAS home, because ‘home’, you were taught, was something you made outside of you, something you settled for, sooner or later, because it’s what your parents and friends did and are doing. You burn with more than this inside you. You blaze with visions that seize your chakras and dance in your dreams. You wake up in the morning with divergent feelings, polarities, taking you in different directions, bringing you to different focuses that don’t always reflect what it is you actually want in life or feel in your soul that you are meant to be and have.

If you want to experience something new in your spirituality, in your emotionality, because spinning around in the same dance isn’t enough for you now and maybe it never really was… In SoulFullHeart, we have a heartfelt and deeply experienced answer for you that may actually be the one you’ve been looking for, that you didn’t realize you were missing… until you let yourself feel it for the first time.

http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

You can try a free 30min intro with Raphael Awen or Gabriel Heartman. Email soulfullhearts@gmail.com or contact one of these men directly through Facebook.

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

 

Life Changes Bring Chances To Feel What Needs To Heal

by Kalayna Colibri

divine hand

In these moments, on these days, there isn’t much to do but surrender to the tornado and trust that you WILL land somewhere soft and grassy… these times of upheaval actually press us upward AND onward, while encouraging us to go inward.

The preciousness of parts of you can be forgotten in the everyday shuffle and the ongoing dreamings of what you want to experience, be, have next. The emotional and spiritual pain and distrust that they hold can become buried, even in a life that is genuinely good. The gift of these ‘tornado times’ is that they can surface and be felt again, healed deeper, brought with you to that new place the Divine so wants to take you and IS taking you, even if you can’t feel the surrender or see the ground beneath your feet at the time…

This is the ongoing offer, invitation, love we are granted and flooded with. This is what is represented by intense weather patterns that do somehow shift around something inside of us and also reflect the storms inside of us.

As hard as it can be and often is in these moments of poignant and pure feeling, there is always a Divine hand being held out for us to grasp onto, that encourages the authentic YOU to hold a hand out for the parts that are struggling in their fears and suffering in their pain, seeing and feeling the worlds – their worlds – that are collapsing in so many ways, while they reach out for a ‘more’ that they need reminding is not only possible, but already here…

In this bittersweet time of movement… of upswing and downturn… we learn to shift the gears into place, taking all of our precious cargo of self and soul with us. Bringing it all to that ‘Promised Land’ within, that does want to take us to all that we most deeply want and work to feel worthy of. 

 

~~~~

 In SoulFullHeart, we are now offering a free 30min intro session where we will talk with you about the process in more detail and feel with you where we could go together. If you’re curious about that, you can visit our website for more information: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions and/or contact Gabriel Heartman or Raphael Awen to schedule one with one of them. 

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Eclipse Energies Bring A Renewed Sense Of The Sacred Masculine Dance

by Kalayna Colibri

 

solar-eclipse-clouds-man-light

The Eclipse energies are bringing out something NEW in the masculine. It is trying to birth a new sense of what the ‘sacred masculine’ is, which has felt elusive and puzzling, not to mention hard to define. Any definitions we’ve tried to say are ‘it’ have tended to fall short most of the time, for it is still being rediscovered, along with the sacred feminine. It calls for men who are able to embody its messiness of heart and truth on this path of rediscovery. It calls for women to feel it within themselves as a counterpart to the budding inner feminine. The wounded masculine is alive within us all to some degree, until it has really been felt for the protection it has wanted and needed to offer and the tiredness it is feeling more and more as it realizes it IS wounded and does need our love and healing…

This healing can and does happen, the more we hold the desire for it too. It is so much of what needs to be felt and healed in our world as we ‘kNOw’ it today. It is expressed in the ways we claim to ‘know’ what we cannot in many ways, mental approaches to spirituality that do not ask us to embody it and feel it deeply inside of our hearts as arising sacred humans, and it is our okayness and also thirst for war and battles in any way, shape or form. It is expressed too, through our outrage, through our self-image creation and maintenance, through our push-aways from our hearts and the hearts of others, through the walls parts of us have built around us, wanting to contain and protect was is precious within, wanting to keep itself from being felt for what it truly is.

We see and feel it in our leaders and our leadership inside of us too. We feel it in our sexuality, our desires for dominance (though as woman, perhaps this is more subtle or takes a different form than it does for men), our pushing and action-based lives we’ve led. It is something that shows up often in our daily lives, especially when we have not begun to really see it and feel it.

Perhaps this current Eclipse will help bring in more illumination of this inside of you and inside of others. I am feeling it for myself today and these words are what I want to offer the masculine inside of me, inside of you, and inside of all men…

~

To the renewing, emerging, strengthening Sacred Masculine, within AND outside of me…

I invite you into a dance. A dance less structured than a waltz, and as passionate as a tango. I want to fill my dance card with the names of men (and eventually, only ONE man) who feel the pull, the desire, for themselves, for me, for us. I want unchoreographed, spontaneous steps, sometimes in alignment with each other, at other times not. I want the mess of the self-discovery that has us at times wondering how on Earth we’re going to navigate this one, though we both have the gumption, the desire, the courage to keep going inside as the only option.

I want something I can grab a hold of, without tugging or being tugged on. Something that is concrete yet has breathing and fluidity and room for what IS along with what could be and what we both want, starting with what we want inside of ourselves.

The games of old, those ones we never wanted to play anyway, they are being asked to crumble inside of us. They are being set to fall away in avalanches of pure love and sacred union codes coming in, that so do not resonate or match the currently embraced picture of romantic relationship, which is steeped in much emotional and spiritual immaturity and unrealness.

I want to let it all, all we’ve thought we ‘knew’, fly away with the wind in poignant moments of sorting through this from that within each of us and within ‘us’ too. I want to unlearn and relearn it all with you. I want to feel it all bubbling up and bursting within me and within us, and play it all like notes and chords on piano keys, bringing it all to the fore of our relationship ground, that place where it’s safe to do so and yet the precipice of where it could all fall apart (and in phases, needs to) is always there too.

I see you, I feel you, I know you… I trust the heart that is arising and reconciling inside of you, sometimes with contention and male ‘UMPH’. Ugh. YES. The line of abuse cannot be reached by a heart that is working towards its purity and holds deep reverence, respect, love, care, for itself and me too.

I want any resistance that’s here within you, within me, to BE pushed up, to be felt, to be held, to be loved, to be ultimately moved. I do not want the resistance to become the relationship, the reason to slow it all down. I want our parts to know, feel, understand that you are there for them, for your own, that I am there for them, for my own.

I want the genuine, the real, the incredibly HOT sacred masculine that arises from deep within the shadows and caves of the real, the soulful, the heartful, that doesn’t caretake, the penetrates in all the ways it needs to, that mates and creates and brings its truth, even if its truth isn’t polished or perfect or even UNDERSTOOD fully. I want the shit storms. Yes. The masculine in ME wants that, wants to be pressed up, pushed on, noticed, healed, moved, so that the feminine that so wants to dance with it and with YOU can arise more and more as the climate shifts to one where it can, where it is safe to, where it isn’t expected to battle, to be an Amazon, to outrage, but to encourage, to be, to heal, to offer

I want the ‘shit storms’. Yes. The masculine in ME wants that, wants to be pressed up, pushed on, noticed, healed, moved, so that the feminine that so wants to dance with it and with YOU can arise more and more as the climate shifts to one where it can, where it is safe to, where it isn’t expected to battle, to be an Amazon, to outrage, but to encourage, to be, to heal, to offer healing, to LOVE, to have her stillness that is born from an elegant blossom grown in mud and fun too. I want those portals the masculine and feminine are meant to create together, to bring out from each other, to step into in love that is made in the physical and other levels too. And you’ll know if you can do this, by your reaction to these words, that yes, I do feel are coming from a masculine AND a feminine inside of me too. Somehow, I trust that if you’re meant to, you’ll get this. Your maturity will resonate with it and your heart and soul that desire to FEEL and to HEAL and to make genuine, heart open love that travels to the Cosmos and back again with a woman is what you’ll feel now.

This is not coming from a woman who has solely been burned, been victimized, been abused, though of course that lies in this woman’s heart and body’s history with men who haven’t embodied the sacred masculine before or really even tried (save one, who to this day I still heal with consistently and we help each other move a lot, even just as dear friends). My stories of these experiences are not an attachment, though they also live in my Metasoul as well as my emotional and physical bodies. Nothing inside of me is asking you to heal it for me. Nothing inside of me needs you to be something you’re not, for what you ARE, IS the journey for me and for you.

I feel ready. I feel ready to take on something new. I feel ready for what can only move and heal in monogamous, romantic relationship. I feel a new relationship arising to my own inner masculine that wants to become more of the sacred masculine too, and at the same time, I feel my feminity wanting to arise more and more, to be in the space with me more, to feel safer there than she ever has. To share this with a man, who is also feeling inside of himself a feminine counterpart that wants to arise and heal and be, along with a masculine that wants to do the driving, to lead himself to more healing on a REAL level, to be in deep sacred union mateship with a woman that he sees and feels as body, heart, AND soul and wants to claim with all of his being as she claims him with all of hers, THIS is the dream, this is the desire that is bursting from me today. And this is the ongoing invitation, perhaps right now more than ever before with these Solar Eclipse energies coming in and illuminating, shifting, driving us to more and more healing on levels that maybe we could not have imagined before.

My inner masculine and feminine, who are trying to reconcile something with each other in this moment, it feels like, thank you for taking this in right now. They thank you for welcoming their passion, their unknown about themselves that they are looking to discover, their desire to feel it all. Thank you… and I welcome you into this powerful sense of passionate discovery and rediscovery for yourself too.

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

In The Humble Service Of Love, We Serve Ourselves Too

by Kalayna Colibri

Blonde Girl Flying with Butterflies

As I hold space for others, so I hold space for myself.

As the journey unfolds with a facilitant and within my relationship with this facilitant, I feel more ‘me’ that arises and surprises too. I feel teachings escape my lips, coming from a place higher than where it has felt that maybe my head and heart have been in recent hours, minutes or days. I feel offerings full of love that move within me, sometimes bringing me to tears as I feel my beloved facilitant’s tears too. Together we feel the magic of the moment, of the movement stirred within her, that is somehow stirring within me too. I feel her, I feel me, I feel how we are connected to each other, yet also to something bigger, something ‘ahead’ yet not ‘above’ us, that dances in collaboration with our hearts and souls in this sacred space we call ‘SoulFullHeart sessions’.

We pilgrim to this place, this Mecca within and held too in community group spaces together, dining or checking in or both. We journey here through the heart, with the mind, engaging all facets, all aspects, all parts of our being. We bring all we are to the table, we work to build this altar of inner ‘god/goddess’ worship through many tears, many words written down, many feelings deeply felt. All awakenings along the way are markers, big or small, of where we have gone and where we are continuing to go. All birth canals are just that… deep breathing that allows for contractions within our being, bringing about new meanings, new places to see and feel the world from, new ways to see and feel ourselves and the magic of our inner worlds. The shadows have magic in them too. They help to show the light, they illuminate where the love still needs and wants to go, they bring in more of what we need to feel MORE loved, MORE ‘up’.

I am always humbled by what comes when I hold session space with another who is engaged in this work. I am humbled by their journey that is unfolding, unearthing before me, within them, in my presence, in the presence of the Divine, of curious Star Beings, of Archangels, of Metasoul Aspects, of as-yet undiscovered parts who are waiting in the wings for their moment to hold center stage in this healing place of inner worship and love. Wow. Nothing beats this… nothing compares to all that is learned through this. Here there is no kNOwing, only feeling. Sometimes pure feeling, without words. Pure spaces of really letting in love, sometimes for the first time, or what can truly feel like the first time.

I keep learning as my facilitants learn, about themselves, about the world, about spirituality, about what it means to be human, but most of all, what it means to be THEM. They keep leaning as I do, into me, into my experience that has placed me ‘ahead’ of them for this phase at least, into the Divine, into an arising heart that is growing and healing and expanding inside of them and inside of me too.

I am blessed to be in this place, holding this space with others walking and feeling this out. I am blessed to share it as a process for me too, just as it is a process for them. The crucible of leading, of teaching, of serving love, is a deep calling that flows inward and outward, both, like the most sacred river you will ever feel, ever find, ever kneel before and drink from with the most reverence you have ever felt in your life. I have the honour of serving love, of feeling more of the love that I am, and getting a front row seat to witness that unfold inside of another.

For me, this is what it means to serve love in this phase of my life. To wear my humble robes of experience, to wade through the self-doubts that surface from parts and Metasoul aspects of me that actually need this crucible in order to heal. Incredible. Divine. Sacred. I am in love… and more and more, I feel like I AM love.

Another corridor awaits and at each turn there is more.

And here we go, into it ALL, with it all, loving it all, and then some. ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.