Category: SoulFullHeart Healing Process

A ReLOVEution To End Inner Violence And Violence-Based Choices

Published on by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Colibri

re-love-ution

“These violent delights have violent ends  

And in their triumph die”

– Romeo and Juliet, ActII, Scene VI

 

Our suffering so often comes from violent choices.

Violence is chosen when parts of us decide to bury themselves, to bury their pain, covering it up, numbing it out, putting makeup on it, pretending it either doesn’t exist, or in some cases hiding it in plain sight through sabotage of this relationship or that job or through self-harm in the form of addiction of any kind.

Violence is chosen when parts of us decide to see the world as personally oppressive, racking up reason after reason, building a case for their victimhood, making it inevitable that an intense push-away always becomes necessary and the world feels like ‘us’ against ‘them’. As we assuage the battles within, there ARE times sometimes when we receive violence and abuse or aggression from others and DO need to advocate, to turn away, to all-out walk away from what needs to collapse for the sake of our self-worth and also at times our survival. Sometimes this has a violent playout and fallout. If this situation lasts, there is likely some deeper violence still happening within, because this relationship on the outside represents a battle raging on the inside. It is a climate that your parts have gotten used to… and have not learned how to be or even imagined how to be anything different towards each other.

Violence is chosen when parts of us hold rigidly onto ways of seeing and feeling others. In some cases, parts don’t want to feel others’ perspectives, or, would prefer to feign compassion rather than be in the process that allows them to feel genuine compassion for the first time. This serves as a numbing of the self. It is a focus on keeping the victim inside alive and pushing away the budding King or Queen of heart and soul. It is also violent when we try to press our point of view on another who isn’t ready or doesn’t want to take it in. It is violent too, to use aggressive energy behind our words and point of view. These examples are another way to become numb to the needs of others and the ways in which they need to walk out what they are walking out, without name-calling or unfair readouts. This is a hard thing to avoid doing when we have so much tension inside from us to us and part to part… this does move over time though and is so important to keep feeling as it comes up.

Violence is chosen by choosing to eat foods that are violent to the planet and/or to our bodies. I don’t offer this as a piece to feel shame over, but rather something to just feel into. It does feel important to let this in and to make new choices, feeling the parts of you that have resistance to this along the way, so that they can come with you and not feel as if THEY are experiencing violence against THEM, as this dynamic can happen too…

Violence and revenge in different forms have become a strong underpinning in our cultures worldwide. It is a way to see war as an option, protests as the only means of revolution, and aggressive, ambitious efforts the only way to be ‘successful’.

A reLOVEution can be and IS so different than this… than even those subtle twinges of wanting to fight fire with fire in some way. There is a way that we can stand up for ourselves through boundaries and vulnerability that doesn’t need to result in withholding love in any way. We can find a way to teach ourselves new ways of being in life and in LOVE without committing any sort of violence, suppression or oppression inside.

This is as much an ongoing process for me as it likely is for you too. I have had many years inside of a process of peeling back the layers of inner violence and battles and even recently have felt a Metasoul aspect that still lives in the era of Women’s Suffrage in the UK. Really intense timeline, that one. Talk about fighting fire with fire! She and I have been able to feel that there IS an alternative to these violent means of ‘fighting’… feeling how bringing vulnerability is actually the key to deep inner and outer change. She is still being convinced of the truth of this, as she understandably lives in an intense time and hasn’t really seen this in action, but she is trying and that is enough for me to feel something MORE wanting to come and be inside of me and thus from me to others too. I actually feel her helping me write this piece today… it’s helping her digest her reality and new possibilities that are arising for her and for others.

A new, violence-less horizon is calling, wanting to help us end our personal and collective suffering… how deeply you are able to heed this call is a very personal choice and it feels like any healing of this on any level of your being is a fantastic start!

LOVE to you, fellow reLOVEutionary!

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Energies Invite Us Into A New Kind Of ‘Strength’ From Within

Published on by Kasha Rosa7 Comments

by Kalayna Colibri

Alessandro Sanna

Painting by Alessandro Sanna

Our self-doubts run deep within a river of rejection fears and wounds. This river rises more and more as these energies swirling around us come in to shake it up, bring it up, flush it out. Having days that feel like everything inside of you is against you is part of this process… there are parts of you that want you to feel them, finally, in their turmoil. They want to be loved in spite of their spiky armor and seen for more than just the pain they hold. They want you to show up for them, to show them that they have worth so that in your very being, you can feel this worth deeply, inhabit it, live by it, and never compromise it again. So much inside of you wants and aches for your advocacy from you to you, to stop the madness for each part of you and Metasoul aspect too.

The image of the ‘Heart Warrior’ is another superhero that parts of you want to lean into, yet it too is an archetype of invulnerability that pushes away love. Yes, there is a ‘hero’ inside of you that shows up somehow to feel YOU for the first time in the form of these precious parts of your being, heart, and soul, and yet the famed ferocity is for naught. It is only a picture of what is needed to cut through the din within, but not the sword of love. Love needs no sword. Love comes in anyway, sneaks under your fence posts, doesn’t need to shield itself and certainly doesn’t need a weapon. Love will win the wrestling match, even though parts of you try to prolong it for years, decades, centuries on end, pushing aside its mirrors, following only the habitual flow back into patterns of old that have yet to bring you the joy and fulfillment you’ve wanted.

There wouldn’t be a way to feel all there is to feel without a strengthening happening within – an energy that cannot be broken by any outside force and eventually no inside one either. It is a way to feel that all you’re feeling does have purpose and that the gauntlet you’re walking out is the training ground you need. This is a strong metaphor, yes, because this is what it feels like to truly be in process in these moments where so much is surfacing. It feels as tough as it is, as it has had to be. Parts of you have built walls to keep the flood waters of feeling out, yet here they are blowing apart your inner dams and bringing you to a new surface above it all where none of it is transcended, yet held, owned, taken responsibility for, and healed over different phases of life.

We are not only being cleared out by Ascension energies, but we are being strengthened, toned, given new legs to stand on too. What is moving needs to be replaced, not only by crystalline cells but also by a new stance, a brand new way of standing with a strength that doesn’t need battles to prove itself, only a continual advocacy for and with love. It’s an ongoing invitation to no longer seek and find reasons to go to war,  yet to feel and love the parts of you that want to and have become very good at it over the years.

It’s time to flow into the inner rivers of pain and wounding, to find yourself on a new shore, renewed and more alive than ever before. To let it all surface takes more strength than burying it and you can so trust that it’s all leading you somewhere safer, LOVElier, better.

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Collapsing And Awakening Into Deeper Spiritual Consciousness

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

By Kalayna Colibri

the_awakening_by_anatofinnstark-d9r2on3

Painting: The Awakening by Anato Finnstark

“Am I real?”

I laid in my twin bed in a room temporarily shared with my soul friend Gabriel, around this time last year, sobbing. This question rang inside of me as I wept uncontrollable, deep tears. I couldn’t track if it was a part of me and in that moment and the moments that followed, it really didn’t matter. I was crying and shedding layers of persona that came pouring off and out of me. Something was moving, though I wasn’t sure what.

It felt so strange to hold this question… it was a true, ‘wow, I feel so f*cked!’ kind of feeling. The ground that had been established for 29 years of my life, many years of spiritual seeking and emotional exploration, was suddenly in deep question. Who was I? Who AM I? Why did I suddenly feel as if I ‘knew’ so little when it came to spirituality, even after so many years of studying this and intuiting that, and listening to this teacher and that teacher?

This work in SoulFullHeart is deconstructive. It brings you to the point where the parts of you that have been shouldering your life and also your spirituality like Atlas shoulders the Earth decide they can’t do ‘it’ anymore. They let in that they aren’t now and perhaps have never been who they thought they were – meaning that now, you can begin to feel that YOU are not who you thought you were. Wow. Even after years of process and doing this piece by piece, part by part, these moments of pure tears of awakening within are not something that can be predicted, they just need to be given the space to happen.

As my tears continued, I thought about Jelelle and Raphael sleeping in a nearby room. I saw them as light beams in their essences. I could feel the identities we each have and need to have to some extent as a costume we sign up for and wear throughout our lives. As humans, we wear our stories like cloaks around our shoulders, and some of us have zippers in these cloaks to bring them in tighter to us. Either way, it’s a costume and it’s temporary. This washed over me, especially while connecting with Gabriel who heard my tears and felt to come over to check on me. I could feel his heart and the heart of Raphael and Jelelle too. I could feel the purifying work we’ve been doing, and I could feel how this is what allows us to go into these spaces when necessary, to fill back up with love again and a deeper sense of our essence.

This experience was visceral for me. It cannot be dissected or analyzed. It was a precious new beginning and recognition of what real spirituality is… it is not something that lives in the mind, though the mind is needed to help us understand somehow,  even though our consciousness can never fully reach out and ‘know’ or understand everything. The mind is also here to help us picture, envision, plan what’s next for us (as much as we even CAN plan these days!). My own mind was collapsing in these moments last year, telling me it was tired. My heart was collapsing and yet strengthening too, telling me it was tired of trying to go beyond itself and into territory that doesn’t resonate or make sense to it in an experiential way.

This was an awakening. This was and is a place where many of us are heading in different strata of our being and the layers of awakening are going to move through us, as they need to and as we ask for them to.

We are dismantling and collapsing and we have MUCH to feel in the process. Our worlds, inner and outer, are in question in poignant moments of disclosure and revelation. We are all awakening, we are all letting go to let in, even if we aren’t fully aware of it. We are not here to criticize one another for wherever it is we choose to go or not go. We are not here to condemn, ridicule or cast aside. We are here to feel ourselves first, to begin entering this process of self-disclosure and discovery, with help, with mirrors, with advocacy, with tears, and with joy too. If we serve love, we are not always positive or optimistic, but we are real, only becoming realer and realer, until the overflow of a heart that wants and receives from self can then serve love to other, assisting them in their own journey of finding this flow within. It is becoming harder and harder to NOT be real now. We are no longer able to spend the currency of the false, at least not for much longer.

How amazing it is, to be able to go here and come out the other side with a deeper sense of love and what it truly offers us… when I look back on this last year of my life since this process, I can see the ways in which it helped to fuel some big shifts inside of me, some of which are still landing deeper and deeper in my soul.

All awakenings we have, no matter how intense, are here to help conduct us through a necessary birth canal that leads us to our most desired outcomes and a deep sense of spirituality that humbles and loves us beyond anything we can begin to fathom – until we collapse into the capacity to do so…

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Acknowledging, Feeling, Honouring And Healing Our Narcissism To Feel Real Compassion

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

by Kalayna Colibri

Look-Within

There are phases of very necessary self-focus. It’s good to dedicate a lot of time to personal process that has to do with YOU as your number one priority. Some of us don’t do this enough, some of us do it too much, and the balance of giving and taking is somehow very challenging to find and live into. Eventually, these phases of needing to go inward have a healthy sense of self-focus that has more of a balance of where the focus goes and comes from a growing emotional and spiritual maturity as we heal and allow in mirrors that help us map out where to go next. This takes a dedication though and the process of it all has not been shown to most of us before, so there is a lot to discover and rediscover as we go, allowing ourselves to get messy and sometimes trip along the way as the best way to learn.

Within our birth families, many of us have been the ‘black sheep’. Parts of us never felt understood and found ways to rebel. This took an enormous amount of self-care and focus, the best parts of us could conjure at the time, and necessarily so – these self-made nests of bedrooms and cozy family basements became our stages for self-exploration. We needed our forays into writing, artistic explorations, fantasy worlds, and eventually spiritual seeking and finding. We needed these phases of pushing away from the collective, from birth family, maybe even from peers and the church and/or education systems, we were wrapped up in. Parts of us started to refuse to go deeper into it… or decided to go in as deeply as possible, following along with another flavour of rebellion that may have meant following the rules only to one day snap and burn it all away. This took whatever ounces of love we could muster and find in our inner and outer worlds, drawing friendships and romances that were (and are), in the end, reflections of how we ultimately felt (and feel) about ourselves.

In order to push away from what we could feel was very much NOT us, or not what parts of us wanted to be, we had to encase ourselves in some degree of HEALTHY narcissism. This encasement may even have stretched well into our adult years, or, we had parts of us that decided to suddenly flip a switch and go far into the other direction, feeling ourselves as deep empaths that can quite powerfully feel others. Even in this though, is a layer of narcissism. There is a layer here of blaming ‘other’ for how and what you feel. There is a fixation on how ‘you’ are being affected by something or someone or somewhere, without truly feeling how and why others may be affected and that you may or may not have a part to play in this too.

Feeling and realizing this shatters our mirrors held up by our own hand, that only show us our self-made goodness, yet not the deeper, more compassionate goodness within that has true innocence and purity of intention. Our narcissism in our years of needing to rebel, needing to find an ‘us’ that could hold life, needing to navigate a spiritual path that we hope will open out to serving others, has been mostly about us and not actually about serving the world or the people in it. This is HARD to look at and feel. This is probably one of the toughest reflections of ourselves and how we’ve operated in this world to take in. True compassion, in my experience, can’t really come unless we are willing to see this piece inside of our shadows. Feeling all of this also frees us from our victimhood that again parts of us have rightfully needed to hold onto… We cannot truly find our power within unless we are willing to go here.

In terms of our Ascension, it could be that this is one of the biggest pieces for us to look at and heal with deep sobriety and dedication. If there is no interest in doing so, there is something to look at with that too, as it’s natural for our deep knowledge of our goodness to not want to have to go here, yet our ‘goodness’ can be a story that parts of us tell, meanwhile they don’t deeply feel they ARE good, until they have been able to feel the reasons why this is… the reasons why they hold this wounding. There is so much unworthiness within that this process brings us to. There are many layers here and each one brings us closer and closer to our higher hearts, our genuine Christ Consciousness, where we can and do shed tears for others, for the world, and then can bring it back inward in a healthy way too, to digest it all in authentic Divine connection and love, and in genuine soul and heart connection with others too.

Being real about not being able to feel or even care for others in a given moment, actually helps parts of us relax and can bring us almost immediately to a more compassionate place within. It also claims our responsibility and our desire to heal this block to serving and giving love. We have not had adequate modeling of how to truly be compassionate in this world. So much of it has been put on for the sake of self-image, it feels like. This has not been ‘bad’ for us though, we are just entering a phase of being invited deeper into it, to question it and ourselves more, and to really heal what we need to in order to be in LOVE in the truest sense. We already have all of the goodness inside of us that we need so as to truly feel and love this aspect of us that again has served us so well for so many years.

There is so much love on the other side of this mirror. So much love that wants to reach you, to flow to and through you. Love that wants to show itself in all of your relationships, in whatever ways it can. It is a love that is ever-purifying and incredibly deep, if only we can start to let it in and allow it to do its work. ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Energy Update: Going Into CORE Wounds In The Emotional Body, Metasouls

Published on by Jelelle Awen2 Comments

By Jelelle Awen

burst.edit__0

Sometimes I share about current energies and it is a download from my higher self/angelic aspects/Divine Source that describes more of a collective experience. I am more like a NOW caster, sharing what MAY be happening for many souls on the ascension and awakening path at the emotional body, soul, and physical levels. With these messages, it is not always personally happening for me as I may have cleared those aspects in my Metasoul field already or healed it in my emotional body. It’s not that I am ‘done’ with healing, it’s just that I am in a different phase perhaps having been on this path for awhile and starting ‘ahead of the curve’ in some cases, signing up to be an early adopter.

Yet, THIS phase of where the energy seems to be bringing many of us, I AM also strongly feeling and experiencing myself. I spent yesterday in space holding for myself and some healing and BEing with one of my core wounds that I haven’t felt triggered in awhile yet life set up the perfect storm of situations for it to come up. I didn’t come to our group call yesterday to BE with me and the Metasoul aspect that seemed most connected to this wounding, Mareeka, who is an Atlantian aspect. Her Atlantis timeline and my current one are bleeding through to each other in ways that I have not experienced before (another aspect of what these energies are offering us.) So, the core wounding for me in my emotional body AND as a Metasoul theme for me is around ‘rejected daugher’ or ‘unloved daughter’ for which my soul gave me plenty of opportunities to feel this life…I have been ‘working’ this one for many years in many layers and ways and I was grateful to be able to move another piece of it yesterday.

Through my personal experience and what I’m witnessing in others, I feel THIS is a phase of going into these wounds in a more ‘real’ way than many souls may have before. I offer in the video below about how these high frequencies of photonic light, intense cosmic activities, and PURE love waves are pushing up woundings in our emotional bodies and Metasouls to be felt, healed, and LOVED and how to BE with all this through parts work.

This process is continuing and seems to be accelerating. MUCHO accelerating. CORE wounds are different than energy tones and that we might identify as emotional reactions or emotional moods. I believe they exist in our emotional bodies and our individual, personal Metasouls yet, also, in the collective emotional body and Metasouls.

CORE wounds run DEEP…..very deep. In my experience, they cannot really be made into a part or subpersonality as we do with other frequencies such as depression, rage, anxiety, control, etc. They are visceral, without language, they ooze OUT and WITH the frequencies for which they have been formed. They are beyond the mind, cannot be talk therapied or hypnotized or cleared through energy sessions (although these things can help.) The main way to heal them seems to be the continual connection to the outer and downstream expression of them, which is the persona aspects such as the Inner Child, Inner Protector, Inner Punisher, Inner Teenager, 3D Self, Inner Matriarch/Patriarch, etc.

It is connecting with these persona aspects and getting separation between them and YOU (your soul self, authentic self, higher self coming into body) through verbal dialogue, written journaling, creative visualization that then clears enough ‘out of the way’ for the CORE wounding to come up. This is the process SoulFullHeart facilitators bridge to you during sessions and the ‘work’ you do on your own as differentiation only happens INside you and not through others, although a guide through this murky and sometimes difficult terrain, who is going through it themselves, can be critical.

As this separation happens from these persona aspects…..THEN you can begin to feel the CORE wounds that lie beneath. Deep pools of oozing CORE unworthiness, disconnect, abandonment. These words don’t really suffice as descriptions, yet they are the closest that we have. When these CORE wounds finally come up after much self love holding space AND differentiation/negotiation with the persona parts, there isn’t much that can be DONE but to feel and BE with it. There may be stories and scenes associated with these CORE wounds coming up but, often, there is not. There may be connections to this life, childhood experiences with birth family and especially parents, but this often the surface stuff.

The deep dive into this CORE wounding is what we seem to be supported to GO INTO with these high frequencies of loving light. With a more palatable sense of our ethereal guides/aspects, we are able to feel more safety to go there then we have before. It was easier to be distracted before by the ‘surface stuff’ of reactions and triggers and projections. Still, many souls are being distracted by these things and NOT going deeper to feel how this lives inside of their emotional bodies. Yet, for those who are open to going within, THIS seems to be the time and phase to do so and there are MANY rewards for doing so, the biggest one being the OPENING of your upper heart to receive and give love with self and others.

I feel that these CORE wounds can be bypassed and often ARE by many, even those who are teachers and WAYshowers. And, that’s ok, in a way, because there is still service of love coming through the parts of them that are ‘in charge’ of the BEing and aren’t ready or wanting to go there yet. I’m just here to bring and offer a bridge through SoulFullHeart to these deeper spaces and especially to and with those souls that FEEL there are woundings in them that they want to FINALLY feel and heal in their emotional bodies and Metasouls and want to offer this healing to others too.  The feeling is usually that a ‘ceiling’ of some kind has been reached on awakening and especially related to the emotional body.

ALL this talk of CORE wounds does not mean that we are broken or need fixing. We HAVE wounds, yet we are NOT actually our woundings. It can SEEM that way when they remain hidden away, yet exist as an underground operating energy in so many areas of life, impacting so many areas of our lives. Our Infinite Love essence can illuminate and hold these woundings and invite them to integrate and into the light of Love that we ARE!

Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond . Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

This Creative, Love-Flowing Time Of Day!

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kalayna Colibri

FLOW-Colors-Fibonacci

Early morning is my favourite ‘time’ of day… this time of creative flow even though I’m still sleepy and full of ‘work’ with my online job. My life is incredible, it really is. There were so many years when I couldn’t imagine that I would be living this way, yet I so wanted to. I couldn’t possibly have envisioned exactly how this would go or what this life lived in service of love would look and feel like. There was always a fantasy of living amongst others who shared my level of consciousness and challenged me to keep expanding it. Retreats and spiritual conferences were great but not enough – I needed and wanted to make spirituality my life.

This time of day (early morning) is also when my beloveds in my community of SoulFullHeart and I start dialoguing over Google Hangouts. We live in the same building, more or less, yet this is our way of staying in touch and also being in our own sacred spaces. The love exchange is there underneath all correspondence, even if reactions are being shared and processed or guidance is being held and given as to where we need to go next inside of ourselves and inside of our relationships to one another. It’s something I could try and describe to you, yet it’s just a unique experience that extends well beyond ideas of ‘unconditional’ love. We love each other deeply but are so willing to let go, let be, let arise, without unfair expectations, at least after this much time and process and this many phases together. We are a close-knit group but we have done a lot of personal work to have this level of intimacy. My place in this community has had its ups and downs and times of turning sideways too. Every single minute of tension and exhilaration has been so worth it though, to be able to transact love in this way, and to FEEL so much love for myself AND for them! There is nothing I can compare this to. It is the closest thing to ‘Golden Earth’ I have ever experienced in THIS life, where love is the container, the contender, the artist and the canvas too.

I’m being moved to share this experience in this moment, because of love overflow I feel from nourishing time with Jelelle yesterday, feeling the love and care from Raphael as he helps me clean, paint and fix-up my new suite I’m moving into soon (same building, just a bit bigger for my dog and I), and the ongoing love I feel between Gabriel and I, my best soul friend who I have been through so much with. I am brimming over with gratitude and love for them and for ME too… so much so that tears are coming. I have been intensely immersed in a new chapter for myself, training and doing practicums for a new online job that will pay better and have better hours than my current one. And it’s all happening in the name and flow of love and serving love too, as this means more money to share with my community and more space in my day to serve facilitants and also through my creativity, wherever it wants to take me.

It has taken a lot of process to really see, feel and let in what I have in SoulFullHeart – the work itself, my parts, the people, and most of all the LOVE. Gratitude and appreciation of been a long time coming, and this genuine, heartfelt flow of it that I can now feel is one that truly brings tears and the warmest feeling in my heart that I have ever experienced. It is a true feeling of being held by the Divine, by my own heart and self-love and also by the love I am IN with OTHERS. There is nothing that compares to commUNITY. At least nothing I’ve experienced or can speak from!

There is nothing I want more than to share this with more people. To have more of you jump in with us, though of course this is challenging… the hardest part is the awakenings within, the stirrings of arising process, realizations that you have much to heal as a human AND a soul and that it ALL changes you and your life in big ways, though the changes may feel subtle at first in some cases. Yet, it is so worth it and that worth and reward can only be experienced personally. ❤

We are holding another group call over Zoom (online) tomorrow at 11:11 am CST (Mexico City) if you’d like to join us. You’ll be able to immerse with us for 2 full hours and even be given the space to share if you wish. Silence is okay too. It’s a lot to take in. We are a lot to take in. This ‘new’ frequency of LOVE is a lot to take in! Here is the link to the event if you are interested in learning  more: //www.facebook.com/events/271320303342295

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Universe Awaits Your Return

Published on by Gabriel HeartmanLeave a comment

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I was sitting down and feeling the need to reconnect to myself as so much has been moving and shaking that last few weeks.  There are times when a part of me can get a bit caught up in all the shiftings that I can loose track of ME sometimes.  So I gave myself a moment to come back to me and listen to what came.

Just sit….there is nothing to “do” but “be”.  Be in your body. Be the moment.  Let the thoughts of before and after flow in and out.  Let them fall to the ground like leaves in Autumn’s presence.  Observe them.  Let the tree of your essence bare itself to you.  Be naked.  Be unadorned.  Be in the peace of this Now.  Nothing to solve. Nothing to accomplish. Nothing to complete.  It has all been solved, accomplished, completed.  It is only your over-mentalized 3D Self that is needing the clarification, classification, and valuation. It is not wrong. Just conditioned to everything it has learned in this density in order to survive and hide.

This has been a gift to you, believe it or not.  It has offered you the ground of choice and voice.  Of creation and destruction.  It has been a battleground until you have been able to learn to let it be your playground.  Much is moving and shifting in this expanded Now moment.  You are changing on levels you can’t quite comprehend right now.  It is okay.  Your only job, if you want to call it that, is to feel.  Feeling is the evidence that you are BEing, living, growing.  What you produce or consume, other than love, is all ultimately and illusion.  However, to a part of you, it is a very real one at that.

It is okay to stop.  To take in the moment.  What is real in both joy and pain?  In weakness and in strength?  You are a magical being that is moving mountains even as you type.  As you eat.  As you sleep.  You do not have to understand it all or be conscious of it all for it is happening.  You are happening.  To get closer to it you only need to feel and receive. Let in the guidance and love that surrounds you in any given moment for you are the lungs and the breath. The heart and the blood.  The fingers and the keys.

It is all made of Love and you get to make of it what you Will, whether it be peace or overwhelm.  It all informs and leads you to this place of your infinite power and desire.  The real world, your world, is so much more than you have been conditioned to imagine and accept.  Feel the sacred in the profane.  The consciousness of your surroundings. This ebb and flow of your emotional symphony.  This moment gives birth to the notes of your heartsong.  Let it be real in all its textures and tones.  This is an unending and ever-beginning discovery if you just be open to all that life is wanting to offer you in each moment.

Listen, breath, BE still.  The universe awaits your return and readiness to receive.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual teacher, men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Sacred ‘Mess’ Of Your Healing Path

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

by Kalayna Colibri

follow me, find your mess

“Come follow me, and you will find your mess” – a biblical quote reframe, as offered to me by Yeshua

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There’s a light up ahead, held by someone who has done much work. Someone who beams a beacon of hope and love and possibility. Their energy invites you in and also invites you to follow them. They don’t energize being ‘better’ or ‘holier’ than you, they only seem to energize that they are somehow ‘ahead’ and want to vulnerably lead you into more possibilities, healing and growth for yourself.

Maybe you choose to follow because the warmth of the heart cord between you is incredible and familiar and not like anything you’ve ever felt before in this life. You want to be near this person, relate closely with them, and yet you can’t quite relate to them yet. They feel ‘close’ to you in a sweet sense, yet they almost feel like something that isn’t from this world. How could that be? They certainly seem human enough. You conclude that somehow they ARE human, just living in a different sort of dimension than you’re used to. Wow. THAT’S interesting because the dimension you’ve been living in feels old, stale, essentially loveless to you more and more these days as you continue to awaken to the universe within and outside of you.

As you continue to follow this person up ahead, you feel the infusions of light and love that they offer. You feel too, the realness they hold about their personal reality – how they or parts of them feel or are reacting in given moments. You can feel them holding this reality as sacred, though sometimes the energy feels intense to parts of you that you haven’t fully felt yet. What they offer to themselves and to you seems like ‘love’, but it’s a different love than you’ve experienced, as most of the time those around you refuse to be ‘real’ or current with what they’re feeling or experiencing. Or, on the other hand, they dump energy and emotion on you and in the space they hold with you, feeling like a victim and playing a victim’s role, effectively and skillfully drawing up a case that backs up their claim to perpetual victimhood. You’ve never had this contrast be illuminated for you before and it stirs something inside of you. Parts of you may start to feel victimized to this new frequency of love that is so illuminating, as it shows you too the ways in which you have been and held this same energy of co-dependently being in relationship with others and not deeply maturing emotionally, though you may ‘seem’ mature to most others in your life. You are experiencing how this love is holding up a mirror for you, and wow, there’s actually quite a bit of shadow there to feel!

This being you chose to follow encourages you to keep feeling it all. WHAT?! I have to FEEL it all?! You begin to feel a part of you is getting overwhelmed by the volume of what there is to feel, and you feel a bit surprised by what is still there that you thought you had healed by now. You feel the weight and the mess of it all… the entanglements within your relationships, past and present, the knots living inside of your heart and soul, the shadow pieces and parts of you popping up now to be witnessed, felt, held, healed. It’s a lot. Sometimes it feels like ‘too much’… and your new leader invites you to just ‘hold on tight!’ while the winds whip by and through you, inviting you to step into them despite the swirling chaos inside of you.

This is what it means to be on a path where you find that ‘mess’ within. That ‘mess’ that you learn to love as you trust that it’s leading you somewhere NEW. Amidst the mess, you get to decide whether or not you want to continue walking into it. You get to decide in every single moment, what you want next. And you get to decide whether or not you really trust this process and are ready for it.

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In SoulFullHeart, we don’t hold a grandiose or lofty picture of who we are as spiritual and emotional teachers, leaders and facilitators. The work we’ve done and continue to do is challengings and sometimes downright hard to be in, though the payoff is incredible, as the growth and consciousness expansion is exponential. If anything we are here to guide you if you can lean into what we offer and embody.

Choosing to be around us in any way or form offers some sort of challenge to your being, just because of this way of life we embody. Choosing to be with us here in community, well, that pushes up even more… yet your readiness is something you get to gauge in every moment, even as ‘mess’ comes up from within and seems to be playing out outside of you too.

Following any sort of spiritual and/or emotional healing path should push up quite a bit inside of you. Even if you are not drawn to SoulFullHeart, whatever path you may choose will very likely give you a lot to feel and heal. There is no way, in my experience, to avoid or fully transcend what we signed up to heal in this life. Embracing our messes, no matter where we are in our path or what teacher(s) or leader(s) we may choose to follow or learn from, gives us this gift of finding our way to deeper and deeper decisions about the playout of our lives and how and who we most want to be.

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Arising Into Our Authentic Spirituality Through Our Emotional Body

Published on by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Colibri

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There’s a way that I couldn’t find my sense of authentic spirituality and Divine connection until I started working with my emotional body, and allowed myself to be in process around everything I needed to feel.

Since beginning to ‘seek’ for something beyond the Catholicism I grew up in, at around age 14 (maybe a bit younger), I had a sense of what was beyond me and also within me. I could feel soul gifts coming forward and wanted them, ached for them, to be expressed in the world. I got some sense of ‘purpose’ then, though it was cloudy and a muddy most of the time without really having a specific teacher to lean into. I found different spiritual leaders and teachers to follow over time. I thought that my path was to become a psychic medium and be on stages throughout the world, writing books, speaking to crowds of adoring fans, soaking up love from my Divine connection and also with a Sacred Union mate. It was a grandiose, glamorous picture.

Though ‘my’ (more like part of me’s) dreams at the time were of fancy worldwide gatherings and beautiful clothing bought by book and ticket sales, it turned out that my emotional body was not dressed in sparkles. It was more like the beggar lady in a fairy tale, who often turns out to be a powerful soothsayer – a voice of truth and wisdom that helps to humble the prince or princess. It started to show me the mirror I most needed to look into. I was not yet compassionate nor was I coming from love or letting in that what I really needed was some kind of purification process for my heart and soul. At the time, parts of me were convinced that all I needed to do was keep learning and the being and becoming would come later. Well, there’s some truth in that, because our spiritual learnings and leanings do lead us somewhere, inevitably. Yet to be spiritual in the deepest sense, seems to mean embodiment and experience are more important than learning itself and the desire to perform often is just a desire for love. At least this was definitely the case for me.

Working with my emotional body has led me to more spiritual openings, realizations and LOVE exchange with the Divine than I can express through words. Words aren’t quite enough here! The toughest, darkest processes that make you feel as if you are going to die or want to die, are actually the ones that put you back in the arms of the Divine and really help you and your parts let in the support that is always, ALWAYS with you and within you. I’m not exaggerating here either, because this feeling of ‘wanting to die’ DOES poignantly come from parts of us who are nearing their collapse. They are at a tipping point of falling into love and letting the arising authentic YOU fill the space and lead in life more. In my experience and what I’ve witnessed in others, THIS is the most powerful ground to find and feel our Divine connection and access and letting ourselves in this way is an experience we can never forget but can always learn from and it is a space we can always return to.

Working with the emotional body is sometimes grizzly and also completely WONDERful. You are such an incredible mystery to yourself and as humbling as it is to step into, the process of rediscovering your own sense of connection to the Divine that hasn’t come to you from a priest, guru or book is your birthright and something you can powerfully claim that WILL forever change you and your life whenever, if ever, you are ready to say ‘yes’ to each step as it arises before you.

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Energy Update: Ascension Energies, Emotional Body Purgings, Need For Holding Space For Yourself (Video)

Published on by Jelelle Awen2 Comments

I’m sharing a video below talking about how the high energies we’ve been receiving are pushing up reactions in the emotional body….as they are meant to….and how to BE with that. This process invites you to have compassion toward the fear and resistance that is coming up, not pushing it away or bypassing it or ignoring it. The higher self aspect of you that is coming into the body and into your heart WANTS to hold space and respond to this fear WITH love. Wants you to hold space for the fear rather than go into distraction or diversion.

These ascension energies are offering a purging of the emotional body too…if you’ve focused mostly on your spiritual awakening and development, then you will be FEELING this coming up as, again, it is meant to. Your soul holds the space for the emotions that maybe you haven’t focused on as much. High LOVE frequencies are wanting to move you into choice points such as leaving relationships that you aren’t happy in and your soul frequencies aren’t matching in. This is an example of the kind of choice points that are being brought to you, along with geographic shifts, moving from occupations to vocations, etc.

If your emotional body hasn’t been felt in a deeper way, such as through what I feel is the most effective way…..parts work, then THAT is what is coming up around the choice points. On one level it is just a choice about leaving a relationship or job, etc. but on another level what hasn’t been felt in the emotional body is fixated around the choice point. Push-pull, mixed emotions come up then….if you can’t navigate with parts of you then you aren’t going to be clear. You CAN be clear. You CAN identify and differentiate. You can then go to the root of the feelings rather than being just in reaction about the situation.

ANY reactivity of fear is parts of us, not our essence, not our authentic self. This can really help with the feelings sense of “I’m going backwards” in my awakenings because I am feeling so much right now and reacting to so much right now. Rather, actually, the soul awakenings are making MORE safe space for the feelings to come up. You are getting bigger as a soul in the body so the Inner Protector and persona-based parts are allowing more parts’ feelings to come up and out.

There is always a ‘good reason’ for the resistance. As you become your own love detective, so you find this out for yourself what those reasons are and the WHY of them, which clears the emotional wounding and reactivity. Your capacity to show up for your process here is key and to reach out for help for bridging of this parts reality with YOUR reality.

More in the video below……MUCH love from my heart to yours and an offering of energies of trust in the process as it unfolds!

 

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Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond . Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.