Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.
In this video, SoulFullHeart Teachers, Facilitators and Sacred Union mates, Gabriel Heartman and Kalayna Colibri, invite you to feel the emotional tones and origins of your Inner Mother/Father part(s) of you. These parts come from the lineages on our mother and father’s sides in this lifetime, yet they are also shaped by templating received by other sorts of caregivers, authority figures, and pervasive cultural conditioning around what it means to be a man or woman. A signature piece of this templating is often invulnerability in relationships, distrust towards life, love and others, control, and anxiety, all at varying degrees and depths.
The Inner Mother/Father can also be called the Inner Matriarch/Patriarch. Both of these represent the wounded masculine frequencies taken in in 3D reality. Kalayna and Gabriel discuss the different ways in which you can feel these parts within you, such as through feeling the relationship your mother and/or father had with their sexuality and their bodies, members of the same or opposite sex, life, money, etc. All of this templating becomes instilled within parts of us and until we can begin to feel its effect on us and the ways in which parts of us have also taken on this conditioning, it can be very challenging to actually heal this conditioning and begin to move beyond it.
Kalayna and Gabriel also share about their personal processes when working with these parts within themselves, as well as what this process usually looks and feels like for those who inhabit the SoulFullHeart Way of Life healing process and path. All of your committed efforts to being with and healing these parts of you opens up your heart to deeper compassion for how and why these parts originally formed as well as towards those who helped plant this conditioning within you in the first place. The ultimate intention is to begin to uncover and rediscover what it means to express as a ‘man’ or ‘woman’ in an authentic way that comes from a healing and conscious heart.
If you have any questions or comments, you can leave them in the comment thread here on the blog, on the Youtube video, or find us on Facebook (just look for Kalayna Colibri and/or Gabriel Heartman and/or SoulFullHeart Way Of Life!). You can also email soulfullhearts@gmail.com.
Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.
We are learning to serve love, serve our fellow human beings in stride with love, through our humanity. This is why it can feel so hard sometimes to be around each other’s pain, let alone our own pain. So many attempts are made to bandage the wound instead of healing it because the sight of the festering is too much for parts of us to bear and reminds us intensely of our own places we still need to go. It can be a momentous effort to actually stay in the room with ourselves, let alone each other, and to try and offer any amount of love in that context can be so challenging for parts of us that really would rather try and not go there or look here.
There can be no ‘perfect healer’, at least not in human form, as far as I can feel it… we can work to become purer and purer channels of love through continued work on ourselves, in conjunction WITH service of others, which is actually the bigger mirror for us. We can be transparent and vulnerable with each other about where we are still needing to go inside of us, what shadows seem to be peeking up, what we have gone through and are walking out for the sake of our own healing. Perhaps one of the most beautiful things about our humanity IS our messes and our courage, our insurmountable, wonderful courage to just, keep, going.
I think we have been pre-disposed to going to battle, serving ‘god and country’ because we are actually quite wired for service, period, and instinctively know this, feel this, believe this! We are meant to be in the ‘trenches’, yet not in a literal sense… we are being called to the mistaken, old, worn-out battlefields within others to apply medicine of heart and soul balms. Yet we are called to our own inner worn-out battlefields first. Peace cannot begin to move through our world without this, without our efforts to heal our own hearts and not transcend them or ask anybody else to transcend theirs either. Humanity cannot begin to mature beyond this mentality of needing to fight, needing to ‘other’, needing to find opposition in order to find itself, without looking inward on an individual basis first.
The singular agenda for humanity as a whole feels like this piece of remembering that we are of service… and what this even means. What is service without martyrdom, without self-sacrifice, without climbing up onto a soapbox to shout at the obscene and unfair crucibles of the world, without going to war or battles? What does it mean to be human and still serve love from the deepest hearth of our hearts, admitting when parts of us feel fear, shame, sadness, anger, rage and finding the vulnerability in being with that? Sometimes loving others means setting boundaries. Sometimes healing others means allowing, showing them they have the power to heal themselves, with the genuine love and support that comes from authentic soul family/tribe connections and a heart-based connection with the Divine that is not theoretical but felt and experienced.
How to serve other human beings while serving our own selves and our own humanity is an unfolding quest, actually, and an unavoidable one at that. In SoulFullHeart, we offer parts work and this is what works so deeply for us, as everyone, even and perhaps especially the people we serve, are all reflections for us to take in, of where we’ve gone inside of ourselves, what we’ve already cleared and healed, and what we have left to clear and heal, too. Yet we are also always learning more and more what works best for us, who we are meant to serve, and how. I doubt there could be any human healer on this planet who isn’t meant to feel this humility of not always kNOwing what’s best for another soul, for this is what invites us all into deeper collaboration with each other and with the Divine, who is always working through all parties involved in the healing effort, finding, rediscovering and ultimately healing Itself back to wholeness too.
This all makes serving love as a human being a trial at times and rather challenging, yet we keep going into it because we know, we trust, that LOVE is worth it, that everyone on this planet (and beyond!) is worth it… that WE are worth it. We are heading in the direction of love with every feeling space given to ourselves and others, and with every ounce of our vulnerability we bring to ourselves and the world around us. We are goodness, we are Angelic, we are the ones here to move along with Ascension and love along with Ascension. We are of service. We are beacons. We are amazing. And so it IS. ❤
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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.
Sometimes we trip over our own feet… those ones we have planted firmly in our ground of Now. Parts of us want our feet to stay planted there and in fact of needed this too. This isn’t only the physical ground we’re in and on, but our current heart and soul ground, our mind ground, our personal discovery ground.
I have this feeling that as humans, we aren’t the MOST stubborn of the creatures in this or any galaxy, yet there is sometimes a hardened rigidity that gets tough to move beyond or even see beyond. Parts of us get so used to the patterns that even they are tired of drawing, that even our pain becomes a familiar bedfellow. To take the steps to actually heal this pain, to move it and not just move beyond it, takes a superb amount of courage and desire. And this is not always easy to come by within us, though it feels we are constantly being supported and invited into it.
We do need to move into higher ground within in order to experience life and love differently than we ever have. When we trip over our planted feet, sometimes this is the necessary experience, the mess that leads to learning how to walk in a new stratum with new air to breathe and words to speak. The tripping is the opportunity to look in a healthy mirror and to really come to love all of the reasons why your feet were there in the first place, what choices led you there, and what choices could be next.
Our messes can feel almost insurmountable at times, as the perfect storms we co-create rage and wave through. This can actually make it scary to want to plant our feet ever again… but the truth is, this is what it means to be a Sacred Human… to be able to commit, to inhabit, to firmly decide and to remain in these choices for as long as necessary, until perhaps the next dimension of our BEing is ushered in from the wings and we feel the call to move into another phase, leaving what was ‘less’ behind and embracing the new ‘more’. Our messes bring us order through feeling our inner chaos. The clouds part, the seas calm, the wind ebbs, and we are shifted lovingly into our reborn state, to continue finding our courage and love, our sacred aspects that bring us into wholeness and Oneness again and again, more and more, one step, one trip at a time. ❤
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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.
I can feel the pull of this very auspicious Super Blue Blood Moon and words are going to be very hard today! I am choosing to write now, from the energy bursts inside right now, so that I can ride these waves today and be with what wants to arise inside of me, too.
The waves of light and love from this particular lunar event are potent and ever-present. I feel them pressing into the fields of all who are ready for them and some who aren’t too. Making a nest inside of you for Her vibrations to come through seems to be the invitation for the day today. Maybe a restless night while this event is going on can be avoided if space is made for the fluctuations and movements inside during the day today. This is what it feels like. A get ready to get loved sort of feeling. And the love that comes from Her, from the Divine Mother, is not one that penetrates in the same way as the Divine Father’s love frequencies. Her love is just as powerful but seeps in, absorbs in through the chakras and all of the bodies. It is an alchemical osmosis and it creates evokes the rumbles inside that are needing to rumble and the feelings that have been there below the surface anyways. She is helping us clean house as much as we are ready for. And what you ready for may surprise you today.
Something about this moon seems to be encouraging transparency, too. You can’t hide from it, really… and above all, you can’t really hide from yourself, least of all anybody else. Perhaps there are parts of you that have tried to stay hidden, sometimes in plain sight and other times behind some sort of wall inside. Perhaps there are shadows and light too that come from your being, from your heart and soul and all it has endured, faced, led, walked out, been part of, or co-created for good or ill. You may feel some existential waves come through today, your Metasoul Aspects leaking through the veil inside. You may feel some intense memories surface, held by parts of you that perhaps you thought you had already healed. These could be new layers with new information for you to digest, or they could be echoes. Either way, it is a day for feeling and making space for feeling, whatever comes up and however it chooses to surface in your co-created inner reality.
The illumination of this Super Blue Blood Moon is a special elixir for the heart and soul… one that is meant to guide and support, not to punish or overthrow and throwdown. It is important to remember the love that is here for you, wanting to birth itself more and more within you. Those inner seeds of service of this love want to begin to sprout in good, well-tilled soil within. Today is as good as any day to work towards this, be with this, hold kindness and self-love as the light shines in on the darker, hidden places within. ❤
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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.
In this video, SoulFullHeart Facilitators, Teachers and Sacred Union mates, Gabriel Heartman and Kalayna Colibri, invite you to feel the tones of your Inner Punisher/Critic. This part is intense to work with, as its name implies, yet it also opens out so much more love flow within and through you, from you to you and you to others. Kalayna and Gabriel both share about their experiences of working with and healing different layers of the Inner Punisher and what they have noticed through working with and supporting healing in others too. It is sometimes the hardest part to be with, at least at first, yet they are one of the parts that needs the MOST love!
In many ways, we are raised by the Inner Punisher and its frequencies in our caregivers/parents and other authority figures that we lean into growing up. This is a part that energizes much criticism inside of you towards parts of you, yet also towards others. As it heals, so does the energy with which your intuition and discernment comes as well. This part is a critical one to work with as a healer or ‘lightworker’, as its energies can very often leak out in unconscious ways towards those who you actually desire to support in their own healing. Feeling this part means feeling the often shadowy conditioning you were raised with and that has become naturalized in your life and culture. The other side of this process leads ultimately to deeper, more profound love and self-acceptance and a keen discernment about life that comes from love instead of fear. The many layers of the Inner Punisher that you would feel in your SoulFullHeart process are all worth it, as you begin to feel your genuine worth and love flow in a much bigger way than you would have otherwise!
If you have any questions or comments, you can leave them in the comment thread here on the blog, on the Youtube video comment thread, or find us on Facebook (just look for Kalayna Colibri and/or Gabriel Heartman and/or SoulFullHeart Way Of Life!). You can also email soulfullhearts@gmail.com.
Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.
Sometimes it’s the baby steps that bring you the most into yourself and into healing, not to mention into an opening-out consciousness that expands and expands. There can be so much pressure coming from inside, especially perhaps from Inner Punisher parts of you, who like to sometimes make things seem as if they ‘should have’ been done yesterday, which is so based on deep conditioning taken in from being raised in a capitalist culture, where the wounded masculine rules and the RULES are what matter, not the heart, not the motive, not the roots of anything or anybody…
I feel to talk about taking smaller steps into our Ascension today, because even though in a way everything is being accelerated, it can feel at times like you are moving at a snail’s pace or barely moving at all. In fact, this judgment is one that comes from inside of you… from parts of you that are actually quite afraid of the natural momentum of it all and are having a push-pull experience, with some parts of you wanting Ascension and others not, and all for very good reasons too. If we feel a need to move faster, expand bigger, reach higher, and all in a way that goes beyond our current limits (self-imposed or not) we aren’t being self-loving and the boomerang effect of then needing to go back and redo or reinhabit different life phases along the way that parts of us have tried to skip is often in order as result. Ascension invites us to love ourselves into deep change that starts WITHIN and moves from the inside, out… not the outside, in. It invites us to let in the ways in which love has NOT been on the inner agenda and other energies have been settled for instead, especially in our relationships to each other and our relationship to ourselves and our parts.
There is no ideal pace in this ongoing process and in fact it feels like it is quite different for everyone. As you continue your inner healing, the anchors to 3D let go one by one in self-loving ways… the inner walls are dismantled brick by brick, while being held and honoured for all they have been needed to protect and keep sacred inside. As this all heals and lets go, the hot air balloon begins to more powerfully move us upward into organically arising moments of expansion in our consciousness and awareness of our multi-dimensionality!
There are so many ways and opportunities we are given to ‘pop’ into a new awareness or awakening experience. Some experience this in tremendous moments of momentum and others’ souls opt for the ‘drip line’ experience, where awakenings occur in some doses and in a way that is easy to digest. Some will have a mixed-bag in their ongoing process, as has been the case for me. Yet it all needs to be self-lovingly integrated or parts of you will go off the rails quite literally, which in some cases is actually what’s needed, yet the more self-loving we can be with this integration and the more tenderly we can hold our precious parts in the process, the better.
In a way, we actually owe it to parts of us, whose worlds we have dismantled and reassembled in many ways as we experience Ascension and deep healing processes, to really BE with them in all of this and give them the space to breathe around what they have experienced and what is being shaken up for them. Parts of you are what have made you, YOU… they have given you the gifts of personality and their increased sense of rest is what helps bring them back in, into integration with your heart and soul, which is ultimately not a part but an arising BEingness that can continue ascending in an authentic and ever-expanding way.
No matter if we choose the baby steps or the giant leaps, we are invited to feel ourselves, to be as self-loving as we can be in every moment, and to feel what that even means through a process of being with what HASN’T been the most self-loving response to life (or love!) inside of us. No matter what we choose, we are on a trajectory of healing and returning to the love that we are, so why not find ways to embrace every step, every part we encounter along the way, and find the fountain of self-love, reverence and appreciation that we are being pointed to on our very individual and powerful journeys?
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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.
Perhaps the deepest, most powerful, most emotional and yet also the most spiritual awakening we can have, is to how our self-worth has been measured within.
We were given these measuring tools by a culture fraught with pain and unworthiness. We were led here by caregivers and confidants, mentors and leaders. We were messaged from birth (in this life and other lives too) that our worth is dependent, conditional, finite, and above all, quantifiable. We are told subliminally, unconsciously, that we need to have, be, do, say, many different things that aren’t authentically us in our hearts. We are a species in incredible pain that goes deep. Even if you seem to consciously be choosing to ignore this inside of you, it’s still there. It lingers and pricks. It perks up when the opportunity comes, when it is safe enough to truly awaken to it, feel it, make space for it to continue arising.
It doesn’t matter how often some others may tell you, ‘there is nothing wrong with you’, when there is so much living in the buried basement of your heart’s cries for love, for a connection with All-That-Is, to genuinely feel One again with yourself, with the Divine, with everyone around you. Our separation and abandonment wounding lives fathoms deep inside of us and our parts. It lives and breathes within, it pops up whenever it can, and it does certainly inform your daily experience of life.
To truly find and feel our worth again, we must be willing to feel through the process of it… to be with the parts of us, the pain, the anguish, and the anxiety which all make up our experience of not truly having our worth intact. The fact is that we could never lose our worth… yet to deeply feel it and live from it is a whole other choice that involves feeling what ISN’T it and making room to feel all there is to feel about that.
To be in this process is to slowly begin to come home to yourself in a way you’ve never imagined. And once you get there, you realize that the light was left on for you by your soul and your infinite Divine connection that never left you. YOU truly ARE the love you and your parts have been searching, waiting, aching for. And when this can really be let in, nothing else matters but making sure that you have the things, people, relationships, intentions, that truly reflect this worth and love back to you. It is worth all of the inner-mining and the years of deep-diving within. It is worth it because YOU’RE worth it and the love you are meant to serve is worth it too. ❤
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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.
It feels like there is much discomfort emerging now, in different ways. There is a sense of these energies leading up to the Super-Blue-Blood Moon, that they are rumbly, shaking the well-known ground within and around us, moving us to new places of desire, new places of growth, re-awakening us in short yet intense tremors to what we came here to do, be, offer. The configuration of our lives as we have known them is being shifted now, shaken up WITH these energies in collaboration with our souls and hearts. For many, it could be a time of crisis, where realizations of true soul purpose and reason for being here are uncovered and initial steps, which can be quite painful in some ways, are inhabited in order to fulfill this purpose and calling. This phase feels so like the chrysalis, as Jelelle Awen has been offering. The phase just before the emergence of a brand new butterfly. So much congestion in the bodies, spiritual, physical, emotional, even astral, are all intensifying as they clear now, and all are asking us to continue looking and working inward, wrapping ourselves and our parts in love, being in the process of letting in and trusting love again.
It’s a continuous map of birth canals, this Collective experience of 4D reality landing in all of us more and more. We need these birthing pains so that we can feel the Love holding it all. We are finding our way through the inner mazes, opening up to shifts, feeling the press of that which still needs to be felt, healed, shifted inside. We are being invited into patience with this process, as the Divine has infinite patience for it too. Layer by layer, contraction after contraction, we have so much still to feel and let in. So many reflections of ourselves, our parts, who we/parts of us have chosen to be throughout different phases of our lives, and we are awakening evermore to the feeling that there’s so much more we CAN and WILL be.
The brevity and gravity that has been 3D reality… the pain, the anguish, the abuses suffered… these bear down on parts of us until they start to feel, led by a growing YOU, that they are worth so much more. This is a much more challenging process than repeating affirmations, though I do not wish or feel to knock that if this is needed, as there is, of course, huge power in positive thoughts. Yet we all need to continue watching for any overriding of the pain within. The pain will move and heal with love and attention, as it is meant to. There is a lot of trust needed for this process to truly take hold, and that in and of itself is a process that cannot be bypassed, for there are so many reasons that parts of us have, especially our Inner Protectors, to not trust anything or anyone, let alone Love itself…
As our congestions clear in all bodies, we begin to breathe new air. We begin to let in more love, more self-worth, more sense of compassion towards ourselves, our parts, and towards others too. We move through what has been painful to feel, being with the congestion for a while, until it clears with love and care. With purpose and desire. With discernment in this 4D phase where the 3D reality continues to fall away and embracement of new paths, new ways of thinking and being are knocking at our heart doors. The collective awakening is here, rippling through in dynamic waves, and there is much to navigate, yet the Ark built in your heart is the one that will see you through it all. ❤
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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.
I see, feel and hear the music of your ever-expanding heart,
the grounded bliss of the love within
that I get the pleasure, the honour, the space to be in WITH you…
This flow between us as our hearts continue to entwine
in the most wonderFULL ways
brings me closer
to every cell of the skin
you kiss with such fervent desire
and beckoning strains of truthful, loving arias.
In every chapter we awaken together,
I feel the glow of a golden heart-sun
ever-stronger with each breath
co-created between our healing and feeling hearts.
To create this next chapter with you,
deeply beloved man,
is to create a whole new world
and many new vistas to explore…
….and the fact that I GET to do this with YOU
makes almost nothing else matter.
So many soul songs we have together,
so many dances of body and heart
so many phases and places of inhabited growth
and so many ‘yeses’ to each dawning of NEW day lived out
together…
I say ‘yes’ to MORE and MORE with you…
more of the bliss, the mess, the phases of ups and downs
ins and outs
inward healing and outward service.
I say ‘yes’, because I love everything that you are,
every part you have every been
every Metasoul Brother you have ever felt
and I thank them all
for making up this truly awesome mosaic
of the powerful, heartful, soulful man
that you ARE
and are continuing to BEcome.
Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.
Divine Self Embodiment Blog (Formerly SoulFullHeart) 