Invitation To Heal Metasoul ‘Battle’ Legacies On ‘Human Rights Day’

by Kalayna Colibri

women's rights

https://youtu.be/rZKgL2FZBx4

This morning I felt a desire to feel into what’s sparking up today in the collective. It turns out that today is ‘International Human Rights Day’. A day that holds celebratory energy yet despair too and is the mark of many ‘battles’ from different groups of humans… some still happening today, yet all still happening in the Now as time is not linear… fires, started up and fuelled by separation wounding, starting within and flowing outward, affecting us all and affecting our love flow together.

The meaning of what it is to be ‘human’ has shifted so much over the ‘centuries’ and timelines…. which are actually still very active today, in this Now, and aren’t in the ‘past’ at all. Parts of us and especially Metasoul Aspects feel different events and situations that appear in our linear sense of history, happening in the Now… as time is not now, nor ever really was linear, except for in our 3D sense of reality that we have needed to be in up ’til Now.

The ‘powers that be’ (mostly political and very Archonic/Reptillian feeling to me, at least for the most part) have deemed this race or that gender ‘human’ and granted rights for things like voting and participation in politics, rights to get married, rights to have clean and drinkable water, rights to renewable energy, rights to religion and worship, rights to ‘freedom’ in general. All of this seems to still be argued about, debated about. So much arguing, so many reasons to confirm or deny or acknowledge and especially to feel… to empathize, which is so much more than sympathize. This has been so challenging, as on some level of our being, in different parts and soul aspects of us, we can feel the ways in which we are all a reflection of each other’s pain, wounded motivations and self-punishment, yet desires and soul and heart gifts too. Even after all these ‘years’ of charged events and situations, so much is still in upheaval and so much is still holding up a powerful mirror along with a perpetually pregnant invitation to keep going inward, to feel the origination of all of this turmoil that still rages within, though perhaps the inner battlegrounds have mostly be shrouded in shadow, and even covered over by the coveted elevation into 5D and beyond, with parts and soul aspects of us wanting to ‘just be passed this already’.

When I really feel my own humanity today, I feel how conditioned parts of me have been to project their reality outward. In a sense, it feels like we are all walking projectors. We are all able to create or dismantle our outer realities, based on our inner reality and what is rumbling inside parts and Metasoul Aspects of us. A few months ago, I felt a Metasoul Sister of mine named ‘Meg’. Meg was a Suffragette in her timeline in England. She somehow rose up to become a sort of micro-leader (under a much bigger and elusive leader of the Suffragette movement who they didn’t see very often for she was in hiding and had to be discreet), for a large group of women of mixed ages. The outrage boiled over to the point of burning down government buildings or at least attempting to. Explosives and other weapons were something that Meg learned how to use and taught and led other women to use them too. Together they rallied and fought. Were arrested and released. The suppression and repression of women were not relieved though and were mostly intensified by their efforts. Eventually, yes, they did ‘win’ the vote and a place in the political sphere, yet with so much turmoil, bloodshed, tears and incredible pain inflicted not only on others but on themselves. Their pain was acted out from, thrust outward like a sword. So many of us and parts of us can relate to this, especially after having been wronged in some way, abused, victimized, which is understandable, especially given the lack of templating for how to do and BE something different than this in our 3D sense of reality. The biggest, deepest movement I’ve had with this Metasoul Aspect came during a SoulFullHeart group day, where she could come up and be felt by the tender yet strong and somehow NOT warrior-like feminine heart in Jelelle Awen and the open, healing, and trustworthy hearts in Gabriel Heartman and Raphael Awen as male witnesses to her plight. The sweet tears of Raianna Shai were there for her too and they could feel a shared Metasoul timeline of sisterhood, which was sweet and heart-opening to let in. She was moved into feeling how the needs of the women could have been brought with spine and vulnerability, both. Without battles and with much more trust. They allowed a seed to be planted in their consciousness, that fighting as the men were doing or seemed to be doing, was the only way to meet them as equals and prove their worth as human women. Yet, Meg could feel and is feeling with me now as I write this with her in my heart, that they were actually being invited to lead something different than this, from a place deep within, rooted in a genuine expression of Yin power and self-leadership which feels so different than outward expressions of OUTrage and warriorship.

In all of our attempts to garner more ‘human rights’, we often forget that the true heart of a human being, and especially that of a Sacred Human as we are invited to keep embodying and healing to more and more, is collaborative, empathic, feeling, and somehow inherently trusting. We have needed to forget this for a time in order to remember it again in fullness and contrast to how we’ve felt and held our power or powerlessness so far. To truly listen to each other, feel each other’s needs in overflow from feeling our own… this is the ongoing invitation from and with Love. It may seem idealistic and honestly, to my Meg, it felt like this at first. Yet the more we go inward, especially with feeling parts of us and Metasoul Aspects too, the more we realize that this doesn’t have to remain an ideal and that the peace we all so want to experience and be a part of in our deepest Sacred Human hearts, has to start within, and this is the only place where we can control whether or not we experience it in this and any timeline. And, once this process has begun, the fictional story of the need to take away anyone’s ‘rights’, human or animal, becomes obsolete, dissipates and eventually dissolves completely as the Golden Earth/New Gaia we are waiting and working for, is then allowed to arise out of our hearts in an organic fashion as it is meant to, instead of fought or battled for as this necessary phase of the illusion of separation has conditioned parts of us to feel is the only way to get, to earn, to create what we really desire to experience and feel worthy of.

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

The Desire For Love Underneath It All

by Kalayna Colibri

Lantern

 

Beneath the desire to predict, to plan for, to kNOw ‘what’s next’… is the desire for love.

Beneath the shadowy figures of men and women at the helm of leadership, who desire battles, who embody tremendous self-righteousness, who abuse and accuse others… is the desire for love.

Beneath the shut-outs, the push-aways, the cling-to-forevers…. is a desire for love.

Beneath your resistance to love, as expressed outwardly and inwardly, in words, in energy, in self-harm, in harm of others… is a desire for love.

And in that desire, all of the answers to questions of ‘why’ can be illuminated. And so much more can be felt, heard, seen, healed… loved.

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It often feels as if the 3D world really doesn’t want love. Some might even say outright that they don’t want love, claiming that love really isn’t the answer, or that love is only for the fortunate. Deep unworthiness to receive and let in love in the truest, deepest sense, is surfacing more and more now. There is deep unworthiness in our leaders. Deep unworthiness in fear and war-mongering. Deep unworthiness, pain, sadness, woundedness, in our patriarchal expressions as men and women, in relationships, in ourselves, at work, at home, out in the world. In all ‘fights’ we choose to instigate or be a part of in some way, we are expressing resistance to love… and where love wants to move us, what it wants to illuminate for us, what it wants to remind us that we ALL are… LOVE, embodied, ever-present.

Sometimes love is even resisted with love… it is resisted in the sense of what it wants to bring you about your wounding, which can sometimes be most easily found by going into your shadow. It is resisted by the ‘twin flame’ picture, that offers more suffering than goodness, more clinging than letting go. It is resisted in all of the ways parts of you would rather not feel. Love cannot transform or move you to new heights unless a certain facade is allowed to be cracked.

The 3D world wants love, yet is afraid of what love really is. A catalyst, a river, a cliff, a flashlight in the dark, a path less travelled or never travelled before… and an end to the depths of human suffering, starting within.

My beloveds and I offer a process of becoming reacquainted with love in a real sense of it… feeling parts of you that are resistant to truly letting it in and letting it move you in a new direction. If this appeals to you, you can read more about the process here: www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Also, Gabriel Heartman and Raphael Awen will be hosting a live stream on Facebook and Youtube this coming Sunday, where they will talk more about this process and way of life. You can go here for more details: https://www.facebook.com/events/1529926353733589

 

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Listening To The Lion: Time To Lead With Feeling

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Painting by Gabriel Heartman

The last few nights have been super intense emotionally for me.  I have had waves of doubt, self-punishment, and anxiety arise in my field that began to overwhelm me.  Hard to fall asleep with the intense energies and I needed to connect with the Divine energy to move through some of it.  Through my SoulFullHeart process I know they are not mine but coming from something within me that needs to be felt.

It has taken form of a MetaSoul aspect of mine that is living an Atlantean lifetime.  I had a beautiful group session with the help of Jelelle to feel this aspect and begin a more balanced relationship with him and his intensity.  Last night I began to feel energies that didn’t feel connected to him and could be another aspect of my soul coming through around anxiety.

What the heck is going on?

I felt to tap into my guides and intuition since I couldn’t sleep and was told that this is a very intense time for many.  I have known about the current lead up to the Lion’s Gate portal for a while now, and I am starting to piece some things together for myself around it.  What I received is that this is a time of great confluence.  Many energies are coming together that may feel like a squeeze to some.  It is thinning out veils and the gap between what is authentic and not.  It is bringing in codes that feel to be bubbling up old unhealed lower frequencies that are preventing us from moving into our next growth places.  These frequencies are held by parts of us as well as Metasoul aspects that are bleeding in at this Thinning.  It can be a crazy-making time if there isn’t a larger container to hold all of it in.

It may be advised to just ride out the wave and be kind and gentle to yourself.  I agree with being self-loving to yourself is key right now.  But I also feel there is great opportunity for growth and letting in more of the love we came here to experience.  It all brings up the unloved energies within us that are needing to be held and felt to make room for more.  It is like the altitude is changing and the old denser energies are needing to fall away.  But there is an invitation to actively participate in this process, and not just passively let it go by.  This is the leading edge of consciousness we are stepping into!

I feel that this is the message of the Lion.  He is inviting us to lead ourselves into a new relationship with our experience of life and Gaia as we have known it.  He is about finding our courage and strength and feeling all that we need to feel during this highly transformative time.  What wounds and pains, both this and other lives, are looking to be heard and felt at this time? What resistance is showing up inside of us that keeps us from fully inhabiting the largess and love sponges we are?  This is not an easy choice to make going INto the pain, not to suffer, but to heal.  To reveal. To discover.  It leads us into our jungle and arise as the king and queen of our truest dreams and inner knowing.

You may be pressed to make some difficult choices along the way.  We can not have things stay the same and expect them to be different.  Leading your way into your next emotional and spiritual growth terrain is what Leo is offering and guiding us toward. Healing your way to passion, purpose, and the remembrance of magic.  From denser energy to higher vibration. From care-taking to self-actualization.  From being alone to being in community and sacred passionate romance!

SoulFullHeart offers a pathway and a community that serves this growth and expansion of love.  We are here to lead this way of life into the world to those that it resonates with. The Lion is a huge totem for us and what we came here to do and be.  I am listening closely myself and feeling what it is that needs my attention to enter into more expression of Love and Serviceship.  We invite you to do the same.  Be kind and gentle with yourself during these days and months to come.  And we are here to serve all that is arising in you should you feel the call of the wild of heart and soul.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Revealing Our Inner King

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What is it you are truly desiring as a man? The answer to that question is multi-layered and conflictual because there are different parts and aspects of us that are vying for the manifestation of these desires. This can create a maddening or flattening energy. Sometimes what we believe we want is a smokescreen for something even deeper that changes the storyline of the one you are currently writing. And that can be scary stuff to the parts so invested in the what has been comfortable even in its uncomfortability.

What if what you truly want is so big that you are almost blind to it by the fear of what all that means? Going down the corridors of our true passion and desires can mean upending some strongly held beliefs and expectations. YET…does staying in this status quo really serve anything other than your own passion’s demise?

I, along with Raphael Awenl, are so amped, juiced, and ready to serve those men that are ready to take their spirituality to a different universe altogether. One that blends so many possibilities into one gestalt. You just can’t find that anywhere that I know of. Accessing the emotional body takes us on a journey to clear a path to our spiritual awakening that traverses multiple timelines that can integrate so much of our beyond recognizable potential. Takes us to worlds we felt were separate from us as opposed to actually BEing us.

It is more than just healing we are advocating for. It is going beyond that healing to access our true divinity within to create a world that we have chosen to forget we could create so we can learn something new and remember our way back. That is a mouthful but feels really true. It is not THE truth, just one that we are choosing to play with as we continue to unfold this puppy one felt experience at a time.

We will be discussing the emotional body and out it lives out in men in our next group call this Saturday. There will be a meditation to have you meet your emotional body to begin a dialogue with it that begins a whole new ground for relating to yourself and what you thought was you but is really a part of a bigger you.

If you feel you are ready to just take one step to see if it leads to the next then please join us for a new emerging timeline that bring men together in a way that we feel has far reaching effects among the collective, the feminine, and Gaia. I look forward to seeing you there and what can happen in the space between us.

You can visit the following links for more information:

https://www.facebook.com/events/1529253583760067/

http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/groupcalls

 

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual teacher, men’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Aging UP: Entering A New Life And LOVE Phase On My ‘Birthday’

by Kalayna Colibri

Shiloh Sophia Queen of Her Own Heart.jpg

This painting is by Shiloh Sophia

I turn ’30’ tomorrow. A surreal feeling, as age and time have felt less and less important and real to me, except for those phases when it has to somehow. There are still some really important life phases and experiences that seem to happen mostly during certain ages or decades of our lives, so sometimes it IS important to acknowledge ‘age’ though I feel looser and looser about it, especially for myself.

I think I spent most of my ’20’s’ looking forward to turning ’30’. My 20’s felt awkward and strange at times. So much more self-discovery and remembrance happened during this ‘decade’ of my life than in my teenage years, though so much got started then too. Many phases of letting go, learning to let in, surrendering, hoping, wishing, losing sight of magic and wonder and then rediscovering it again, loving a man, moving through relationships, learning to love humanity again even when parts didn’t want to… this is just a taste of where I chose to go, venturing into shadow and light both and facing sometimes very, very humbling mirrors.

The ups and downs were palpable and as I reflect on them, my god, they were all so worth it to bring me HERE to this NEW place inside me that is more compassionate, more overflowing with love, more desirous of mateship inside and outside of me, more desirous to FEEL and HEAL whatever I need to no matter how challenging, and more willing to step into my destined leadership, starting within and moving without. My heart wants to BE and experience feminine stillness and also experience heart-based, vulnerable, transparent leadership happening more and more from inside of me, to serve and BE love, even when boundaries are necessary and conflicts may arise for one reason or another, all in the name of growth and letting in more and more and MORE with less and less shrinking or hiding or cloaking from parts of me who are fused to fear.

Rolling around with a part of me through reactions to ALL of this arising inside me took the place of sleep most of the night last night. In some ways it was the reactions that kept me up and yet it was also new energies coming in, or so it feels like to me now as I reflect on and feel into this all some more. I’m getting ready and being filled up and at the same time being flushed OUT. This morning has been mostly restful for me, despite any ‘plans’ I thought I had… I feel as if I’m trying to expand my container for letting in LOVE and letting it move through me in conscious transaction and relationship with others. There is so much juice coming in now, being offered to all of us actually. This juice can’t come in without us being juiced first! It can feel like a squeeze at times, as reactions surface and sometimes feel overwhelming and hard to track. Sometimes it feels to me like all I can do is surf it all and trust that as I’m feeling it, it’s also moving, and that there’s  a fast track happening. I’m ON the train now, and it’s moving faster and faster.

As I enter this new ‘age’ of my life, it feels inaugural… I feel how much my inner Queen is arising now. She is waiting to be crowned at an official coronation, held inside me with guides and so, so much love. She is who I’ve been waiting and WORKING for, processing for, healing for. She is who gets to lead in my life now, more and more, as my healing continues and my persona parts of me continue to rest. She is the one ascending to her heart throne while also ascending to the throne built for her in the Universe, joining other Kings and Queens that are also showing up there more and more, leading humanity consciously and subconsciously through this phase of ascending with Gaia. She IS Mother Gaia, as we all are. She IS you just as she IS me and she also is a bridge, a platform, a ship, a rocket, a star and light BEing and leader. She is feeling her purity of heart come forward again at deeper and deeper depths as all I’ve healed and am healing helps to create her crown of jewels atop her head. She is my leader, my healer, my LOVEr living inside my heart and soul. And she is waiting along with me, helping me make room for a King to come and dance with her energy in sacred union, sacred sexuality, sacred and conscious duality, and sacred humanity.

As I find my rebirth into this new universe, I feel this birth canal that she is being pushed through by love and desire. She is responding already to what is coming and what is being asked of me and of her. We won’t be perfect together, yet there is no need for that. Many different birth canals await and that’s okay too, for the need for mess in order to grow is not foreign to me! Yet there is also harvest coming and feasts of celebration inside of myself and with others too. AND I look forward to welcoming more of ALL of our inner inter-galactic, inter-dimensional royalty, as we all reemerge and reunite in this way.

From my Queen to yours, or perhaps your King if you’re a man, thank you for being a part of what has created my journey so far. You have taught me and continue to teach me more than you could maybe be aware of really and I feel you… I honour you. I love you.

In arising and ever-flowing love,

Queen Kalayna ❤

 

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

From Filters to Wings: How Our Pictures Hold Love Back

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So much goodness.  So many possibilities of love finding its way into and through our hearts.  An endless mosaic of dreamscapes that we can inhabit and experience.  As the depths of this ‘reality` begin to show itself more and more, I can feel the parts of me that can resist that somehow with old conditioned responses that served to block all of this out of our fear and lack of worth.  

This is an epic time in my personal life as well as SoulFullHeart.  A new possibility of sacred romance has lapped upon my shores and that has stirred up all sorts of reactions that serve only to squelch desire.  One thing that has come so clear is how a part of us can use a picture of how things will feel or look like when we desire something.  I can feel an openness to All Things but when there is a shadow piece that still lies inside of my heart, Love WILL expose it to lovingly test that openness.  

This is what the process of ascension feels like to me. Yes, the vibration of Gaia is raising, our collective consciousness is doing the same, but not without exposing that which still needs to be felt and addressed that hold us in a state of rigidness or fear.  To be open to letting IN and BEing Love, we have to let some pictures go of what that means to a part of us. Love has no plan or objective other than to love.  How that expresses is up to our willingness to surrender these pictures at the door.  We may not even be aware of these pictures until it just hits us.  

This is also happening in regards to my healing and growth.  I could tell you that 5 years ago I had no idea that I would be co-leading a men’s healing offering.  It just became a clarion call that I have responded to one step at a time.  I am learning to let go of what it will look like or BE like and who will respond.  All I can do is feel the desire, passion, and call and respond to that.  Listen to my inner guidance system and see what unfolds.  It WILL take me to challenging places and need to be with the parts of me that may have some resistance or doubts.  

The Call to BE, Enjoy, and Serve Love is a truly blessed offering.  It comes with its ‘requirements’ of feeling and making conscious all the ways in which we filter and block that invitation. Unless we are able to see outside of ourselves, we can be fused to this filter and need others to reflect back to us this energy of resistance.  This can even block or filter messages from our guides.  This is where being in conscious healing community offers so much to our growth and support with our ascension.  It doesn’t have to be done in isolation but in compassionate sacred space with someone who has been working their own process for years.  
I am grateful to be a part of this beautifully unknown experiment of Love.  I am being given another opportunity to feel and heal what keeps Love from sending me to the heights of Joy and Service.  I get to be felt, feel, and give love.  The filters and blocks are all sacred and honored as portals into my next timeline of letting in MORE love.  How could I not want THAT?!  Well, that is why I need to feel these parts and turn them into wings and open arms.  

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual teacher, men’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Letting In Arising Feminine Leadership, Letting Go Into The Unknown

by Kalayna Colibri

 

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Didn’t take in many light codes today, at least not deliberately, yet the brief visit I had with the sun late this afternoon DID offer me much for what’s moving through me now… powerful frequencies of Divine Father, sacred masculinity penetrating and offering support for my ongoing birth into whatever arising leadership is now unfolding in my life, coming straight up and out from inside me as I continue to heal and serve love too, without construction of a self image around it and just allowing it to arise and arise. I feel how the sun offers this to so many of us right now, whenever we are ready to let it in and bake in it. 

As tears briefly surfaced and fell as I let in this love and support, I felt love and appreciation for where I’ve been and where I have yet to go. Many humbling moments of realization today, especially as I soon reach my ’30th’ ‘birthday’. What life phases will I be heading into? Will they look or feel or BE anything like what others have passed through? It doesn’t feel likely… and in fact, there is something SO different being offered to every single one of us, if we can begin to let that in. Ascension with Gaia may only be one part of that picture of why things will be different and actually ARE different already…

At the end of the ‘day’… I don’t know what’s next, I can’t know what’s next, and I don’t really want to know either. Do any of us, really, except maybe for those parts of us that are yet still afraid to let go and surrender to so much unknown? Life continues to humble us and offer us Infinite Possibilities and it so feels like our power-filled choice whether or not we choose to be with that or swim upstream in spite of it…

 

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Humility Of Really Feeling Our Emotions: Indigo, Crystal And Rainbow Souls Blog Series

by Kalayna Colibri

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There’s a certain amount of sanctity and sanity we preserve by NOT feeling, at least until the layers on top of our true feelings begin to give way and dissolve because of pressing life circumstances and swelling emotional reactions – THEN it can become insane-feeling, as chaos is created outside of us, pushing these feelings up even more as they call out for our attention. This is true for ANY soul ANYwhere. The piece here for Indigos, Crystals and Rainbows is much the same as for any awakening soul and heart – NOT feeling how we really feel becomes the much crazier choice than actually letting ourselves in. Yet too, there is something here that may be time-bomb-baked inside of us when we are in these soul groups, alerting us to this need for changes INSIDE of us at a much younger age because we are here to do so much work as leaders and healers.

I don’t hold any elitist sort of feeling around claiming I’m an Indigo. I actually feel it kind of lightly. For me it feels like a bridge and also a helpful explanation as to why I care so much about my growth and living into my soul purpose when I’m only just turning 30 this year. I became a “seeker” at age 14, which led me to a desire to serve others and feel my capacity to do so. However, this came in with some shadow pieces like arrogance and self-righteousness too and even in my already-cultivated self-awareness, I still wasn’t quite touching these and others, like entitlement, and narcissism, to name a few. This has been a part of the soul package I came wrapped in and some big things to work this life. I signed up for SoulFullHeart at age 24 because I wanted to work these things… taking breaks between then and now so that I could humbly go into life without consciously holding a process from time to time, which only illuminated more for me in the end. Once you sign up for the bullet train of deep healing, there really is no going back, try as parts of you might… 🙂

It took many reflections, some very hard to take in, for me to truly feel humbled, or rather, for parts of me to truly feel humbled and really start to feel what was really going on for them. There are soul wounds and also this-life, human wounds to feel too. These words of “arrogant”, “entitled” and “narcissistic” did NOT go in easily and there has been a lot of pain in even having to see myself in this light. What has been harder is feeling how  TRUE these words have been for parts of me who haven’t been challenged on their ways of being in life before! Until meeting Raphael and Jelelle Awen, I hadn’t had a single relationship with another teacher, healer, parent or friend who could bring these pieces to me and if they did, it wasn’t with love and compassion, but judgement from the parts of them who are the same way. I can’t explain to you the difference between these two experiences. It’s really something to feel for yourself. ❤

Feeling our shadow and what’s underneath it is an important aspect of the process of going within. What has appeared to be “in shadow” inside of us is actually a whole lot of pain that wants to surface and be healed. There are immense gifts on the other side of all tears shed when feeling our shame, hurt and even rage. As our layers of inner and outer protection melt away because we are finally safe enough to really feel ourselves and our parts, we feel these movements and realizations come to us with fluidity on waves of love that come from outside and inside of us too. It is a humbling process, to unravel deeper and deeper knots and layers protecting the precious yet strong vulnerability of the Sacred Human seed inside… the seed that is meant to grow, flourish and serve love to so many others!

Parts of me have needed to be how they’ve been – there is so much to push away from in our cultures and birth family conditioning and understandably, there is also a lot to protect ourselves from…until there isn’t, that is. Being emotional is still not a fully-embraced thing inside of many, though arguably it’s becoming more and more so as more of us awaken and can no longer deny how we really feel about anything or anyone, dark or light, or while in chaos or stillness or somewhere in between. During this ascension process, this is all being pushed up as light codes and astral influences constantly invite us to really SEE and FEEL ourselves in a much deeper way, illuminating the places where we still need healing and more authentic love flow. If you sign-for some help with this from SoulFullHeart, everywhere you need to go with become illuminated and we get how hard this can be to feel through. It is a deep healing practice and while there is so much joy, there is also much sobriety as the transformation it offers you really does start within and flow outward to every other area of your life.

Indigos, Crystals, Rainbows and the like are at an advantage age-wise and also soul-wise. We signed up to wake up early and to draw to us the paths that would help with that. Becoming more and more humbled to where our paths are taking us and that we DON’T truly know ourselves in earnest until we’ve really felt our shadows be challenged by someone holding up a mirror with LOVE behind it, is so important if not critical if we are really here to help awaken and lead others. We must first awaken to OURSELVES, let alone ascension, let alone Gaia, star beings, or anything spiritual. The heart truly is where the journey deeply begins and where all legs of it ultimately return to. And there is no other path quite like the one that really embraces and supports an ongoing exploration of our inner worlds, without an “end” place where you can declare ourselves fully-healed, and with plenty of juice for the journey inward and upward. ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

A Call For Heart-Based Leadership: Less Game Playing, More Vulnerability

By Kathleen Calder

Of all the battles that I have fought in my life, one that remains constant for me is a drive for leadership and recognition. Even as I write this I am coming from a place of desire to be recognized as some kind of new “leader” in this field called “personal/spiritual development”. It has been a struggle to try to let go of that desire, mostly because my Daemon (protector-part, guide, best friend), Sasha, and another part of me named Steven, hold this desire in their hearts. They want me to do what they cannot physically do themselves. Steven is a great scholar and thinker (who is learning to become more of a feeler as well) and he and Sasha have often conspired and brought me opportunities to “prove myself”. Being a guest author on this blog is one of them and I can feel their growing pride in me whenever someone pays attention to what I have written.

The challenge for me, and I feel the same challenge stands for all who wish to be (or already are) leaders, is to stay humble and grounded. To be able to place myself in the trenches with those who I wish to be a sort of “tribe-leader”…or I guess “Shaman” for. To be able to feel what they feel so that their needs are felt, heard and honoured, whether or not I can physically do anything to help them. Instead what I find myself and other leaders doing, is playing to the masses in a way that doesn’t really touch the real heart of the problem we are facing. It becomes a game of popularity and care-taking instead of feeling into what the real issue is.

Let’s look at the recent US federal election as an example of what I’m talking about.

In one corner we have President Obama and in the other, Republican candidate Mitt Romney. I know from my Canadian perspective that many people in my own country were feeling that Obama was the obvious and more progressive choice. Ok. In comparison to Mitt Romney, who desired to take America back to some old-fashioned ways of doing things, yes, Obama is more “progressive”. However, there’s a reason why the election was so neck-and-neck and why so many people that I spoke to actually had no idea who they would rather vote for since neither seemed to be competent enough in addressing any of the real issues. I feel this is a sign of the times we are in. People’s parts, namely their Daemons, are shifting to a place of, “this isn’t good enough anymore” and are longing for something better. That “something better” is the world I desire to help create. It is a world where leaders learn to feel and embrace sensitivity and therefore tap into what the real issues are for their people. The real pain that is buried underneath their desire for marriage equality or for the legalization of marijuana, just to name a couple of recent news items.

There seems to still be an intense fear of empathy instilled in anyone who wants to lead or manage anything or anybody. I learned the other day that Hilary Clinton once cried on camera and it caused a wide-spread panic and sparked questions about her potential ability to lead. I feel that the new way in which we need to be led in this world is through empathy and heart-based vulnerability. It would be a lot to hold as the leader of a country, so it’s possible that leadership would have no other choice but to be more collaborative in its approach. There would need to be multiple leaders in the highest rung.

I can hear and feel some doubts you may have about the potential for that. You and I both feel the danger of the human ego and its’ desire to be the one in solo-leadership. This is the Daemon and other persona parts who desires this, normally. If leaders were in active communication and feeling with their Daemon and other parts, I feel this would be a manageable issue. It is (and has been for a while) a feeling of mine that the more people who embrace parts work, the greater the potential for World Peace. People would be more comfortable being in authentic emotion with each other and would work out their differences accordingly, taking all the steps necessary to be in empathy with each other and their parts, allowing them to be felt and to speak their minds in safety with no knee-jerk reaction.

I am training to become this type of leader for as many as wish to be nourished by the work and the gifts my parts and I would love to bring to them. I am in training and I do not do this perfectly, nor is it about becoming perfect some day. There is no end-result that I desire, except to become surrounded by more people who have surrendered to this work and have chosen authentic, heart-based feelings and relationships to themselves and others. I wish to become more like this and I work on it every day, even as I write this. It is not burdensome. In fact, it is ultimate freedom.

I hope that at least some of this has landed in you. If it hasn’t, that’s ok too. And if it never does, well, I in my imperfection can find ways to accept that, even though it hurts to feel into what that means to me and my parts that desire for me to lead.

In support and love for your journey and where it takes you,

Kathleen

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