Guides – Page 20 – Divine Self Embodiment Blog (Formerly SoulFullHeart)

5D Timelines Arise Through The Watering Of Self-Love

Published on June 8, 2018 by Gabriel Heartman2 Comments

New timelines are like plants. They arise when your inner soil has been tilled by exploring and feeling all the ways in which the old ground has been depleted of the nourishment it has so been lacking. It is taking your 5D love spade and sinking it into the earth to reveal the depths of this drought.

Next, it is about letting in the water of Love that surrounds you through heart and soul resonant others, guides, metasouls, angels, the Divine, and your 5D self. Let it reach the hidden parts of you that have forgotten what love really truly feels like.

This plants the seeds for new growth. New choices. New consciousness. New manifestations that reflect the love that arises on the inside, from you to you, from you to others without compromise of all that you hold dear and deeply deserved.

Tend to your heart as you would anything you find most valuable. You are the most important person your world. Without feeling that, the love you offer is really just a thinner version of the real thing.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Healing 3D/4D Loops In Order To Fly

Published on June 7, 2018 by Gabriel Heartman2 Comments

There is an ongoing supply of pieces to heal within each of us, no matter where we lie on the spectrum of growth. But what is ascension but growth, maturation, and transmutation?

Our soulstory (feeling no longer to use history) is but strata of compressed and fragmented experience that we left in the wake of our densification. As we begin to ascend more consciously, we find ourselves descending, at times, to unearth what we need to come to terms with so that we can untether from this weight that keeps us in what feels like a perpetual spin cycle. The patterns of experience that a part of us can feel a victim to or guilty of.

When you finally get to a place of owning that you truly create your own reality, you take the handcuffs off that which keeps you in an energetic holding pattern. A looping airplane, neither landing or flying, and running out of fuel fast!

What do you feel you are tired of repeating and persisting in your life? Look not at the external circumstance, but what lies inside that is permitting such things to occur. This is not some punishing shame energy (though it can be if there is a part that holds it that way) but a deep and honest look at what the heaven wants to shift inside so you can truly experience what you, your higher self, your guides, and the universe want you to experience!

For each of us, there is a soul theme, or issue, that we are here to work on and through with love. Not looking to solve it, but to understand it and heal it. The circumstances we create are meant to irk us into frustration and desperation so that we will stake the claim of choosing and creating something new with a different energy than we ever have before. We may need to get softer, or more assertive. More compassionate, or less appeasing. The scope and sequencing of our healing is varied like a snowflake.

The energies that lay before you are meant to invite you into this deep exploration of compassionate self-discovery and powerful action. What lies underneath that which has been the most difficult for you to get to the other side of? THAT journey is the one that is your soul calling. The one that leads you to the path of your greatest gift and highest timeline. There is no other time than now to begin.

Healing The Inner Masculine ‘Warrior’: Sharing My Current Journey

Published on May 31, 2018June 2, 2018 by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

by Kalayna Colibri

I’m sitting next to ‘Malcolm’, my Inner Masculine part, by a tree in an etheric realm that has many stars all around and is a mellow shade of dark purple. This tree has become his higher-vibe place to go and be, especially when he feels reactive or is projecting old timelines from this lifetime onto the present and old relationships onto those I love.

The space between us is tender, as he’s feeling with me his desire to change deeper inside of him, his attachment to the ‘tangible’ and how challenging it can still be for him to trust the etheric, the Divine, the feminine in me, and the love that wants to go into him, though he so wants to at the same time. He then reaches next to him and picks up an old, dusty book.

“What book is THAT, Malcolm?” I ask him, “It looks old-timey.”

“It’s Homer’s ‘The Iliad'” he answers.

I’ve never read The Iliad in this lifetime, so I quickly look up the SparkNotes summary to feel into it and why it’s a symbol he’s picked up on for himself. It turns out that this poem glorifies war in many ways, especially in terms of fighting the righteous fight and not running away from battles that need to be gallantly fought and gloriously won. Apparently, Homer includes details of the gory side to war as well, probably to balance it out a bit. I immediately feel the strong archetype that this book shows Malcolm and me, the strong legacy of the ‘righteous battle’ and the conditioning of being ready to bravely fight for your beliefs, your lifestyle, your relationships, etc.

I feel this with him and feel how this is what’s true for the wounded masculine in everyone… men and women. I also feel my heart wrap this energy and conditioning in love, finally understanding some deeper layer of why it’s been inside of me, even though, especially in this phase of my life, there are NO battles to fight, nobody to really fight WITH unless conflict of some kind needs to arise as a mirror for everyone involved. It illuminates too, the battle WITHIN, which is so strong and really is what leads to battle outside of you.

Malcolm is in no-space, no-time right now in the loving arms of the Divine Mother, who on precious waves of tears, he was finally able to let in. This movement feels momentous for many reasons… and it truly has taken the time it takes to get him here!

I’m transparently sharing this story to illustrate a few points that I feel Malcolm actually wants me to make! I’m also sharing because hiding away the light and love that flows from our personal process denies love the chance to go to others and support them in their own movements and openings.

Much love to you and your own journey with your Inner Masculine, in whatever part or form they are taking now, whether you are a man or a woman! ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 35, emoto-spiritual teacher, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Energy Update: PURE Love Bliss Waves Activate Your 5D Self

Published on May 21, 2018May 31, 2018 by Jelelle Awen1 Comment

By Jelelle Awen

Wave after wave of PURE love coming IN and UP at us right now. It is quite extraordinary the RIDE these waves can take you on. Rides to float/land/glide through the ‘gateways’ of fifth dimensional consciousness and BEyond. Experiencing love so immense that you feel like your human heart will burst to let it in. Moving through the resistances and fears to EMBRACE love with every cell of your BEing and so, to BEcome love walking/talking/moving/breathing.

Love in human form beaming…..that’s what these energies feel like as a reflection of our sacred humanity being activated. They are a mirror held in a space of the most perfect lighting so that we can see our own perfection as we are RIGHT NOW. These waves acknowledge that we are in process and in transition….that we are STILL and ever growing and learning. Yet, they also hold the truth of our already attained perfection AS fractals from a Divine source perfection.

There is really no tracking these waves or even connecting them very much to specific SOULar activities (although our sun is doing its part to activate us into these frequencies.) They are just a Divine GIFT to provide an accelerating reminder and remembering of your essence….getting to experience what you REALLY are versus what you have been conditioned by 3D consciousness to think that you are.

The feelings of NEW are in the air brought in by these energies…in your heart, in your soul…they KNOW what NEW means in your life and are BEing inspired/activated now. Your soul feels when something is serving your higher consciousness to come into your body, every day living. Your soul senses when you are serving love and when you are not. Your heart intuits when a relationship serves the bigger picture purpose of you BEing here and when it does not. Your heart feels when something is coming from love and when it is coming from fear.

You can connect more easily now to your soul essence, what we could also call your 5D Self. You can bridge to this waveform that is YOU in your highest and brightest state that can still be embodied. This is YOU in your sacred human best dressed and presented. This is YOU in your unanchoring from 3D-based woundings and traumas that no longer define and confine you. This is YOU in connection and increasing unification with your Star Family and your Metasoul aspects in other timelines and with all the precious 3D parts of yourself that are scattered around and need you to collect them into your heart again.

So simple in this Now to connect with your 5D Self. Just create a sacred space, close your eyes, and ask to connect and to see and to feel. Your 5D Self may show up like an angel, may present as what you have projected as a ‘teacher’ or a ‘guide’. It may look like you only SHINIER. It may be an animal. Trust that whatever you see is right and good.

Talk with your 5D Self. Ask them to support you and guide you. Ask them to bridge for you to the higher dimensions. Ask them what else you need to do and BE related to healing 3D traumas and Metasoul karmic binds/patterns too.

Invite your 5D Self to increasingly BEcome you more and more. Ask to merge with your 5D Self and how you can do this more.

I’ll be sharing a brief video later today that I recorded yesterday when I was floating/riding/gliding at the peak of Kundalini/bliss energies and in merged consciousness with my 5D Self, which is happening more and more for me. I offered a 5D Self connection meditation and transmission you can take in. You can also watch this livestream I did offering a 5D consciousness meditation at around 33 minutes:

It is not bypassing to connect with your 5D Self. It is not transcending your humanity and your emotions to make this connection. This version of you can actually hugely help to hold the space for whatever emotions need to come up and be felt. Your 5D Self can go on the shadow journey with you to reveal whatever is in shadow and needs to be reclaimed. You need a version of yourself that is BIGGER than the reactions and the resistances and the fears in order to have them move and transmute into love again.

Parts of you, especially your Protector, need to feel that you are BIG enough in heart space to handle feeling the deeper, suppressed and often very difficult emotions. Your Protector may relate to you like a child or a teenager and doesn’t see you as BIG at all. Your claiming of your 5D Self shows your Protector that they can begin to rest from their vigilant guarding and LET you hold your own healing. THIS I have seen and witnessed many, many times as a dynamic inside between the Protector part of us, who just needs to trust that we won’t be overwhelmed by what they need to show us and help us remember. More about parts/Metasoul aspects here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts

INjoy these LOVE waves! And, if they don’t bring up joy and bliss, yet rather take you into a necessary feeling and healing place, then EMBRACE that process too. ALL of what you feel and experience in this Now is for the greater service of love. And, you signed up to be ahead of the collective curve and to LEAD others during this time of transition.

This is your bounty time. This is your harvest time. This is your leading yourself time. This is your starting to lead others time. WHATEVER that looks and feels like…..you can trust that this is true as the gift of these Divine energies bring us all into the time/phase of becoming Infinite Love in human form again!

Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of four books about Ascension, awakening, and emotional body healing. Jelelle offers a 90 minute one on one bridging session with her over zoom for $55 USD min. donation with women and with Raphael for men, along with other SoulFullHeart Facilitators as well…more information here. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about our NEW SoulFullHeart process programs, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

‘You Are Ascending’: Holding Compassion And Curiosity In Your Journey

Published on May 18, 2018 by Gabriel Heartman1 Comment

You are ascending…

If you had a deep cry, a thrashing fit, or a sense of Oneness… you are ascending.

If you feel lost, like the world is going to hell, or you see the arches of the New Earth….you are ascending.

If you can’t get out of bed, can’t wake up, or can’t get to sleep…you are ascending.

If timelines are colliding, collapsing, and being challenged…you are ascending.

If you feel like you are swimming upstream, downstream, or not at all…you are ascending.

The only key is to be curious, keep asking, and keep feeling

-Message from the Angels

In my last Facebook post, I shared a message from what felt like an angelic/divine/star-being source. A message from ‘the other side’ a part of me would call it. . It had a lot of resonance with people. It struck a chord in many hearts in many different ways. It came to me after I was checking in with my emotional body. A coming together of my inner 3D and 4D aspects that have been a part of my healing journey lately. Calling them to the Round Table of my Higher Heart, my inner Camelot…a very 5D New Earth vibration.

In that check-in, I could feel a part of me that had a question about whether or not we were ‘ascending’. Even a question as to what Ascension really is. I felt to hold that in my heart and give it to my Higher Self, the Divine, and my angelic/star family. I let that go and just felt all the timelines in which being ‘not enough’ was a theme. Inviting my metasoul aspects to join me in a sacred space of Enough, Full, and Perfect. In that space, you can feel both Presence and The Gap.

In that higher space, whatever feels ‘missing’ or ‘lacking’ becomes a journey and a discovery. It becomes a quest of compassionate curiosity that is not devoid of feeling but going full-frontal into it. The feeling is something that resides within us and can also have external expressions. Many people remarked of not being seen by others, coping with intense emotional swings, and just needing to hear and feel some words of validation and encouragement. It became so evident that we need others in this quest of self-discovery, healing, and becoming.

Going into my emoto-spiritual body was my ‘how’. It was using imagination, intuition, and heart to create the sacred space…along with pen, paper, and music. This creative concert of feeling myself as a sum of parts and transmuter of timelines is the heart and engine of how I heal myself in this divine work that we are co-creating. It is an ongoing process that finds all the places where we need the healing to expand and grow into what our divinity is waiting for us to show up for. Sometimes the healing is hard, but this is why having another to lean into, not rely on, is so important.

I offer my heart space to you to feel what wants to be expressed and felt within you that may be hard for you to feel on your own. We offer bridging sessions that apply what we do in our own healing to see where you may have parts that are resisting, for good reason, the love that wants to come to you through these ongoing waves of ascension energies.

My love goes to all that are moving through major shifts and changes right now. It can be a very bumpy road for some and I feel you in all of that.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Energy Update: EPIC Energies, EPIC Quantum Transmutational Opportunities

Published on May 7, 2018May 27, 2018 by Jelelle Awen3 Comments

By Jelelle Awen

Vibrating, churning, spinning codes streaming in from the ‘holes to make us whole’ in the sun’s surface. Coming in on SOULar winds up in the high 600’s km/second, these are bringing in geomagnetics since the 5/5 gateway opened UP access to our Higher Self, star family connection, and 5D New Earth experience too.

It feels like these higher frequency SOULar activations are staying around for awhile…at least through the end of May potentially. These energies are combining with Gaia’s churnings and burnings, Her volcanic offgassings/ventings and lava flowings….. with an elevated Schumann/Gaia resonance frequency for hours at a time in the last 24 hours to reflect this higher vibrational shift UP.

The resulting geomagnetic storms are being called, ‘minor’ again by spaceweather.com, yet, those of us sensitive (and meant to be sensitive) to these energies can feel them quite strongly. You may feel them in your body as acute tiredness or need to rest, to go within, to be flat on your back yet with your heart and soul open to receive what comes next. The aches and pains can move with this acceptance and going within too. Yet, too, you may feel excited and ALIVE…like blood is coming back finally to numbed limbs. You may swing between the two states of sleepiness and excitement!

The reason for all this Gaia and SOULar energy activity showing up is because of how many MORE of us are needed to step up and into our service of love purpose here. The transition into collective disclosure of fear polarized realities is intensifying across the board.

I know, parts of you may have so often felt like no one around you gets what you are seeing and feeling and awakening into. That it has felt at times like no one is listening or tracking what you’ve been offering. And parts of you may have felt quite alone at times in your dawning awakening, like you are shouting into an empty room. Parts of me have felt that way MANY times over the years and the corresponding despair and hopelessness and just wanting to ‘give up’ that comes with it.

Yet, there has been good reason for this going ahead of others….to BEcome prepared, to BEcome ready to respond with your heart, to serve as a bridge for those newly awakening and those others that have been for awhile and yet may need your specific frequency of love to be in exchange with them. Feel/discover/negotiate with the parts of you that have resistance, fear, and trauma from not being heard/seen/felt by others in the past (and in other lifetimes/timelines)….and move INTO what you are here to BE and do anyway. More about parts/Metasoul aspects here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts

The reason for all this energetic activity is to reveal the places and layers and parts of you that need your direct connection and love with them. Yes, you have done loads of ‘healing work’ and clearing and releasing and awakening. Yes, this is true. And, you may have even offered tons of healing space with and to others.

However, this is NEXT LEVEL for ALL of us now. This is going deeper to the CORE of all of our 3D anchored and undigested woundings and traumas PLUS from lifetimes/lifetimes for which our Metasoul/Higher Self Source is experiencing in the now. This is doing multiple lifetimes/timelines of activation in ONE.

This is quantum now. This is galactic now. This is moment by moment choice to BE love in service, even if that looks primarily like to yourself and ALL parts that need you.

It’s not that you are now ‘behind’ in your healing and awakening process. It’s that the Divine is asking you to go somewhere NEW, BEyond where you have been before as a soul in ONE lifetime when starting from a 3D-based frequency.

Transitioning to 5D IN the body in ONE lifetime…..WOW! This is epic stuff. You ARE an epic BEing. Accepting and surrendering that you WILL have more thing to feel, heal, and be revealed is to connect to the actual epicness of what we are experiencing right now as a collective and as individuals.

To arise….EPIC sacred human….to arise!

Jelelle Awen

soulfullheartwayoflife.com

The BEST way I have discovered for going directly to these resistant/fear-based/traumatized frequencies and actually transmuting them is through parts work/Metasoul aspect connection like we offer in SoulFullHeart sessions through 1:1 bridging sessions and free intros. More here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of four books about Ascension, awakening, and emotional body healing. Jelelle offers a 90 minute one on one bridging session with her over zoom for $55 USD min. donation with women and with Raphael for men…more information here. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about our NEW SoulFullHeart process programs, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Message From Volcano Goddess Pele: A Time For Burning And Churning To Arise Sacred Human

Published on May 6, 2018May 27, 2018 by Jelelle Awen2 Comments

By Jelelle Awen

It is a time for burning and churning of what just ISN’T going to come along with you into the NEW. If you’ve been ‘tempting’ fate and living in energies that are overly ripe for and needing change, NOW is when destiny reaches out Her hands to you and invites you to step UP. Sometimes this feels like a shove and a push. Sometimes this feels like an irresistible embrace and you fall right into the lap of love.

You can no longer live on the outskirts of your highest timeline. You can no longer sit in the back rows of your own life. You can no longer shrink to fit in with those that are content to stay small. You can no longer be defined by that which makes you suffer when you also hold the CURE.

You are SO needed to become into your FULL bloom in the service of love. This is why you are here after all….during this time of so much shifting and changing, during this grand transition of humanity into NEW forms of expression! You are needed here….for the inner healing that extends to the collective. For the collective healing that benefits the individual.

These are Ashes In The Air kind of life phases. These are deep mournings, forgivings, and moving ons. These are funerals to celebrate what is now gone. These are ceremonies that celebrate what feels to be lost arising again in NEW forms.

These SOULar energies of healthy masculine activation serve you to make the choices that are resisted by parts of you. These geomagnetic winds blow in NEW possibilities of shiftings and changes. These volcanic rumblings and Gaia shakings bring life to its edge so that you can reboot again and unattach from the previous forms. These ventings and offgassings are necessary and the eruptions TOO.

This is Divine Mama love in RED HOT form. She will hold the match and she will be the balm to soothe the burns and the swelter too. Call Her to you and She will come. Yet, you have to make room for HER and room for yourself too to let in the form of you that She represents.

To arise….sacred human…..to arise!

MUCH love to you and with you as we arise, ashes in our air, and the NEW a steady reminder of what we can become!

Jelelle Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Grief As A Gift: Bridging Our Humanity To Our Divinity

Published on May 5, 2018 by Gabriel Heartman2 Comments

After an experience I had with my beloved Kalayna yesterday (which I will write about later after we digest it more together), and a heartful conversation I had with an FB friend I was inspired to write about the feeling of Grief.

Grief is a profound experience in the wake of Loss. It opens the heart to the bedrock of our humanity and our divinity. It can be where the two join hands. Ultimately in our highest heart and soul essence, there is no loss, just a death and rebirth, a transmutation of energy. Of course, the circumstance and specifics of the loss can be quite jarring and extremely painful. To lose a child or other loved one in a tragic way holds so much energy than if it were in a natural one. Tragic grief is one that has so many dimensions to it that needs the time and space necessary to be as real and expressive as possible.

Grief is held by parts of us for so many reasons. It can be an inner child or teenager, inner shame and guilt, rage, and/or hurt. It is held in our SOULullar memory as another lifetime in our Metatsoul that may have multiple experiences of that same circumstance playing out. Holding the grief as a part of you, even as you are in the throes of the pain, helps to offer love to it from a different place as opposed to being the grief itself. You can move with it. Love it. Learn from it. Grow from it. It is actually a gift as it opens the heart into realms that were previously hidden and unconscious.

You can arise out of the ashes of grief with a renewed sense of surrender, acceptance, purpose, and self. You can feel yourself as divinely connected to Source, and even the expression of Source Itself. It is not meant to be a suffering loop or to be glossed over with any numerous distractions. The fear of getting sucked up by grief is what keeps the pain in place. That is another protective part not wanting you to feel any more pain than you already have in this and other lives. That is tender to feel and yet is also important to negotiate with this part how much you really want and need to feel and heal, once and for all.
This experience may be the most alive that many of us have ever felt. That is the gift in it as well. It offers a permission to feel all the pent-up rage, hurt, rejection, and existential pain. It is cathartic and transmutative. So as we focus on the joyous side of being Alive on this day of 5/5, there is also the sorrow side that gifts us what joy truly feels like in contrast. And for that, we honor it and love it just as we would any other emotion that helps us to authentically feel our humanity.

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On The Precipice Of Change Is Where Love Finds You

Published on May 2, 2018May 2, 2018 by Gabriel Heartman2 Comments

What do you long for?

What is seeking redemption, truth, forgiveness, and love?

What is it that you truly want to feel coursing through your veins when you wake up in the morning?

Who are you really and what the hell are you doing here?

These are the penetrative questions that rumble the status quo of our current emotional and spiritual consciousness. I am being asked those questions of myself as I feel and heal old patterns within me that have taken me to the next leg of my inner quest and leadership.

When you feel like you begin to cycle on something, you have hit a ceiling. Actually, it is more like a membrane. It is not solid in reality. It only appears that way to a part of you that holds resistance to what lies on the other side. This ‘ceiling’ is actually the floor to the next level, the next chapter, of your ever-evolving growth and remembrance.

What you come to at that moment is a precipice. In front of you is a void that has no apparent stone to step on because a part of you afraid of what happens if there is nothing there to catch you. This has been a repeated part of my journey that is seeking an end. One where vulnerability, risk, and the fear of what occurs on the other side get to create the very steps that have appeared lacking yet there all along.

This suffering ceiling is what brought me to SoulFullHeart. It is what inspired me to say no more to what clearly was not working in my life at that time. It is what is inviting me to go to my next places, next steps that send me to higher heights, along with the fears of falling. There is a moment when you have to decide when the cycles end and the real loving begins. I ask again:

What do you long for?

What is seeking redemption, truth, forgiveness, and love?

What is it that you truly want to feel coursing in your veins when you wake up in the morning?

Who are you really and what the hell are you doing here?

The answers to those questions only come from going into your heart with curiosity, a mirror, and a guide. Wherever you find it, chose it and claim it one choice at a time. Your soul is ready as your heart may waver. That wavering is a universe of parts that have a lot to say and be held in. Feel them and you create a whole new world from the inside out. I offer my heart in service to that exploration of all that you are meant to be.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Journal To The Demiurge – Day 1

Published on April 11, 2018June 9, 2020 by Raphael Awen1 Comment

Journal To The Demiurge with Raphael Awen Day 1

By Raphael Awen

I have been guided to undertake a journaling journey of an ambassadorship to connect with the Demiurge. The Demiurge is the Christian male ‘God’, who is also known as Jehovah or Yahweh in the Bible.

The Gnostics, whose writings were discovered in 1945 at a place called Nag Hamadi in upper Egypt, brought to us many new gospels that were not included in the Christian Bible and it was they who, following Platonic philosophy, related to the Christian ‘Yahweh’ as the ‘Demiurge’. This term ‘Demiurge’ is taken from Latin words meaning the ‘artisan, producer, or creator’. This creator of the material world sought to rule with dominance and required duty and obligation as its main offering of how to form a relationship with itself. The 4th century Roman version of Christianity, then crafted Jesus into this need for blood sacrifice required by the Demiurge, leaving Christian followers under a strong dominance of duty and control, aligning quite well with the Roman agenda.

I know the Christian God very well from a Christian perspective, having journeyed through my childhood along with 26 adult years as a devout Christian before I came to finally and openly renounce ‘Jesus as my personal savior’ in 2005, and from there to re-feel my entire relationship with ‘God’ or the Divine.

Please join me now as I feel called to set out through a daily journal journey to create an Ambassadorship from within to meet with and communicate with this Demiurge, Yahweh, or Jehovah.

What will we find? I truly don’t know, but I so want to find out, and I’m being supported to undertake this journey, feeling my trepidation as I go.

Your reading and feeling this journey with me as it unfolds daily will create the vehicle of approach, kind of like signatures on a petition to gain audience with a King. Your participation along with mine, changes the journey, as well as the outcome.

Here is day one, launched on this auspicious solstice day:

Raphael: This is Raphael. I’d like to connect with my highest and most familiar guides, Archangel Metatron and Merlin, my Unicorn, to inquire about guidance to form an Ambassadorship to the Demiurge, or whom the Christians know as Yahweh, or Jehovah. Metatron, and Merlin, will you speak with me?

Metatron: Yes, Raphael. It feels good to connect with you, and with what desires are brewing for you. What are you feeling?

Raphael: This desire has arisen in me in the form of an idea, a mental contemplation, along with a curious desire to explore, and to really change my world and experience, yet further. This idea is expanding to feel like guidance and a calling. Then comes doubts and questions. Do I know what I’m getting myself into? Do I really want to mess with the Demiurge? Then I feel all the lifetimes and time this life I have dedicated to Yahweh, how familiar I am with his temple worship and communities, and it feels quite doable, somehow. Part of me does wonder though what preparations or confirmations I should gather prior to undertaking such a quest.

Metatron: Raphael, this is a worthy quest, and a weighty one. It is worth all the preparation and guidance that you need. It is worth feeling through any and all resistance or fears that come from within, or without. I would be so honored to feel you and guide you every step of the way.

Raphael: Metatron, what can you even tell me about the Demiurge? Are you familiar with it? Do you feel it as a person, as an Archetype, as a collective consciousness? I’d like your take on that?

Metatron: Raphael, if I could answer that, there really would be no need to explore, would there? The short answer to your QUESTion is that even I don’t know. If I did, I could just share with you what I know and voila, problem solved. I am into supporting you and taking this journey with you. I, like you, can feel the Demiurge as a powerful dominating energy that has suppressed humanity and your planet into a sleepy slumber in prolonged forgetfulness. I know that it feeds off of people’s worship and surrender to it, and that it is never satiated, always wanting and needing more like an addict.

Raphael: Like it’s wanting and needing an intervention of some kind?

Metatron: It’s wanting and needing something, that’s for sure. It has been center stage in humanity’s consciousness and subconsciousness seeking immortality. If it is ready to make or entertain change, then that would be so cool to assist it with.

Raphael: It doesn’t sound like you feel afraid of it?

Metatron: I respect it. I know it has power, but I don’t fear it. If I feared it, I could not reach out to it.

Raphael: How is it that you don’t fear this powerful being or energy?

Metatron: I come in service of love, from which all consciousness, even that which polarized to dark or evil energies, gets its authorization. Love is the author of all. My truth is that there is no real evil, only that which hasn’t yet experienced the feeling of love as an energy. If something negative ‘happens’ to me, it happens to me under the authorization and permission of love, for me to learn and feel something that I haven’t felt yet, and need to feel.

Raphael: Is there still stuff you need to feel?

Metatron: Feel and Heal is still the Deal, Raphael. That is the journey back to source. I’m still not sure what happens when and if we are ever done with that, but like you, I’m curious as hell.

Raphael: Hell is curious isn’t it? and so is Heaven. They both want to know and feel more.

Metatron: That’s like the itch of consciousness itself, expressed in every expression of consciousness, including the time and space domains.

Raphael: I’m liking how easy it feels to connect with you.

Metatron: Good, because we’re going to need to get comfortable if we are going to undertake this mission together.

Raphael: Which I haven’t officially declared yet, still baking on the guidance and gathering the energy in my desire body I’d call it, and calling in all favors too from you and Merlin.

Metatron: I’m curious what Merlin has to say?

Raphael: Me too, Merlin, what say you? If that’s enough intro for you?

Merlin: Whoah, a freakin’ journey to the Demiurge with Raphael and Metatron. I’m in!

Raphael: That easy? No concerns or hesitations?

Merlin: What’s there to lose, Raphael?

Raphael: As I feel this QUESTion in your familiar presence and broadcasting energy field, Merlin, I can feel there is a whole lot to lose, here in the earth zone, which we’ve been waiting and wanting to lose for an awful long time, which makes all of the losses gains. I can feel though that life as we’ve known it, personally and collectively, would have huge shifts internally and externally if this were to shift, and this can feel like genuine deep losses for the parts of us attached to life as we’ve known it, regardless of how much suffering there is in what is being given up.

Merlin: Now I’m taking in your broadcast energy field Raphael… I’m sorry for the intense pain you and your fellow humans have felt under the Demiurge’s reign. I don’t get to feel that much as I don’t live in that energy. It feels so sad, now that I feel it….so much time stretched out to magnify this feeling.

Raphael: Maybe, Merlin, what you and I are feeling is being broadcast from the unfelt heart of the Demiurge itself, the emptiness, a universe-sized heart cry expressing in a compensational need to have dominion as a placeholder in love’s absence?

Merlin: THAT,…finding out what is or isn’t true about that would be worth all the worth there is, I’d say.

Raphael: You have a way of making your point.

Merlin: funny, and true!

Raphael: Wow, Merlin and Metatron, as we are connecting about this, I so feel it expanding in me. I so need the journal pieces here, one line and word, one feeling at a time to let this in.

Metatron: What’s going in, Raphael?

Raphael: A desire to undertake this journey…, to gather all the necessary resources and do it. I so feel bored with anything less, truth be told. I’ve lived lifetimes, as well as 26 adult years of life, this life, up until 12 years go, dedicated to the Christian God, and have come to feel suspect of his origins, how he/it co-opted our innate connection to source. All of this moving in me is coming from a recent deepening with my Gatekeeper, named Rhodes, whom I feel to introduce tomorrow, and allow all this intention and desire to bake.

Metatron: This journey is so worth all the time and process it takes. I so want to feel Rhodes take on all this too.

Raphael: How do you feel Metatron about sharing this journey in real time?

Metatron: You are speaking my language now, Raphael. I so feel that it has traction and realness when it is felt and digested in more hearts. This is a big collective piece of wounding and it needs a big collective heart to create an Ambassadorship to it. It’s a collective heartache wounding that can only heal collectively. Without mounting a posse of hearts, there isn’t enough substance to bridge to the dimension where this pain lives. Sharing this with supportive and open hearts will create this.

Raphael: And sharing it publicly also puts it out there for those, human and not, who are invested with the Demiurge to see it too, right?

Metatron: It’s only fair to let them all know we wish audience, to let them acclimate to where we are coming from. Better they see us coming than taking anyone by surprise. We have nothing to hide.

Raphael: I can tell you wish to say something Merlin, you’re broadcasting again…

Merlin: I am?…ah, yeah, that’s what I do, don’t I? The universe is waiting is what I’m feeling. My god! We get to do this…., really. Holeeee! Can you tell, I’ve wanted to do this since my teenage years in earth life. This is going to take me back to where I can’t even know right now. And that’s what makes it so worth it. This has waited till such a time as this, and till such a heart as yours Raphael, could lead the way. We haven’t had the emotional heart porosity that real ambassadorship is about, but we do now, in you.

Raphael: I do have to wade through some 3D senses of myself in order to let in your perspective of me, but I can feel the truth of what you speak to, Merlin. I have journeyed to open my heart out of a conscious hunger for love, and feel called to share this, even enough to self authorize.

Merlin: Which is the only true authority there is, that which flows from the universe and rings true in one’s own heart. No one can certify you in this. It’s either true for you, or it’s not. After all, it’s you that needs to walk it out, not an organization or a governing hierarchy. That’s the way of the Demiurge that we need to gain audience with.

Raphael: Okay, I’m feeling to take this up again tomorrow, to allow this to digest, and to let in more confirmation and guidance. Standby all, and deepest gratitude for this cocreation.

~ Join me tomorrow for this continuing journey! ~

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about Weekly Sessions, Live Streams, Videos, and Community.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

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