The Hearth Of My Opening Heart: A Poem

by Kalayna Colibri

c: September 2016

Tremors move from your heart space to mine.
An overflow. A love place.
A warm hut with a burning fire.
I seek to understand what I cannot yet,
what I may not ever,
what I may know in spite of myself.
There is a garden behind the heart door.
A secret wooden manifestation of many years of collapsing memories and ever-arising lessons.
Love waits for me there,
with more surprises,
with tourniquets,
with salves,
with the ointment of new life and renewal of my essence’s light.

As the door creaks open wide,
I feel the dust fall from my shoulders, into my healing palms Where I can see it.
Where I can feel it.
Where I can touch its textures and hold it close
As it cries full tears of rippling red shadow pulses and black and blue figures dusty in their own rite
Peeling off the once invisible armors they treasured for so long.

Disarmed yet newly anchored in the safety of my own now opening heart
I rest amongst the silk cushions and wait by the roar of the fireplace
Until you come knocking.

After filling your pockets with your own dusty past and present
And rimming your heart with the sugar-coated candy of a caramel-filled chocolate,
Bringing your sticky-sweetness out to be tasted,
I will meet you here, my love.

In brightness and darkness, with sweets and savories I will wait.
I will work.
I will pry my heart open first for me,
Then for you,
And together we will find the fumbling and not-knowing
To be the greatest fun we ever had
And the biggest challenge we have ever faced,
And the greatest dragon we have ever owned on our own, Together, and with the Divine.

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart co-founder, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

9/10 Energies Invite Moving On, Seeing Next Process Steps

By Kalayna Colibri

Today 9 turns into 10… it feels like a double-helix of new beginnings and taking everything you’ve learned and moved through to the next level while the old continues to move. This means applying all that you are now in all of the relationships you have… which could mean completing some, while deepening or even just beginning others.

I feel in myself a new beginning arising inside from much work and dedication to going inward, looking in the books and crannies and rather dark places. This work isn’t over and actually, I don’t want it to be. Yet I’ll take this new platform, this emerging foundation and these brand new wings out for a spin and feel all there is to feel in the process of that.

This is something I feel for many right now. You could be coming out of a deep emotional or physical process or both… I’ve always found that the two are inevitably linked. You could be popping through another ceiling of awakening and trying to integrate what you’ve been realizing and noticing about yourself, your soul, the world, your Star family, etc.

There’s a ton of support coming in, always, to help us feel all of this and more. The way you can let in this support is by feeling the parts of you in resistance to it. Resistance to love can be subtle. We all have resistance in some form or other, yet it’s how we relate to and feel that resistance that matters and has the most opportunity for growth, maturity, and letting in more love.

What reflections is life offering you now of where you’re on deck to go next in your personal process? We need these reflections to see what’s going on with us, as it’s not possible to see everything, every cluttered corner of your heart and soul, completely on your own. Life is a hall of mirrors, always.

As we move into this 9-10 day, let’s remember that we are ALL working to love our shadows and hidden places, feel what needs love inside of us, and that we are also always given a ton of love to help us see and be with this process. Nobody is exempt from this, yet we all get to choose how and if we accept the invitation to dive deeper and fly higher.

It’s your graduation day… just as every day could be. A graduation into your next phase of becoming more love and serving love too!

Much love! 💜

~

My beloveds, Raphael, Gabriel and Jelelle are all very gifted space holders with magnificent hearts that are ready to offer deep support and illumination in collaboration with you, your parts, your own heart and soul. For more information, visit this page: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/bridging-session ❤️

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart co-founder, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Feeling Your Desires, Letting Go Of ‘Settling’

By Kalayna Colibri

I’ve never felt very personally drawn to the sense that eliminating all of your desires is the path to true happiness. It’s in genuinely feeling our unhappiness because we don’t quite have what we desire that we set ourselves up for our next process of embodying the change we want to experience. Feeling desires does not have to feel like torture, though parts of you may relate to it that way. It’s not about over-stretching yourself into a pretzel to try and “make” something happen, either… though a phase of feeling yourself do this may be necessary for you.

This process doesn’t eliminate the need to feel gratitude. It’s actually a marriage of gratitude for what you’ve had and experienced and even letting in a mourning process of what you’re feeling to let go of, and a sense that you’re ready to move on now, that becomes the process of drawing in your next timeline.

As Raphael Awen has said many times, “the way you leave is the way you enter”. This lands quite deeply for me as I choose my next desires to pursue and let them land deeply in my heart too. There are things that I want, but more importantly, there are experiences of myself and also of others that I want, that are driving me onward into letting in more of what I truly want at this time.

I know so well the rumble that feeling the gap between what you want and want you have now creates in your being and your life. I have experienced over and over again the process of letting go while also holding on to that picture and feeling-experience that lives inside of you that tells you want is truly possible and invites you to feel all there is to feel about that.

This can become a scary process, especially if it is your first time navigating big changes or shifts, or if you’ve been through big changes before but want to move through it all differently now. It takes great courage to move through your timelines and into the unknown. This may feel natural to some parts of you, but completely unnatural and maybe undesirable to other parts of you.

If Ascension is anything though, it’s a letting go of the need to know and feeling all reactions there are to the not-knowing. We cannot ‘know’ our way through this Ascension process, only be with the unknowns of it and feel ourselves walking all of that out. This is the invitation of change and inner-rumble… this is the path to that which you’ve been most deeply aching for.

What are the desires you have for your experience of yourself, love, life, Ascension? What are you willing to move through in order to have and embody what you desire? Can you feel the parts of you that have a push-pull around letting that in?

It IS possible to hold what you want with a growing maturity and willingness to stumble through some darkness… and it IS imminent, that your desires are leading you to the happiness you crave beyond any previous ‘settling’ you may have been ok with for a while, and the fulfillment of everything your soul has signed up for. ❤️

~

My beloveds, Jelelle, Raphael and Gabriel all offer exquisite space holding sessions if you’re curious to ride this unknown horse of your desires more deeply into the next sunrise of your life: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/bridging-session ❤️

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart co-founder, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Healing Your Relationship To Depression: SoulFullHeart Weekly Museletter (Aug 27, 2018)

It’s the release of our weekly Museletter! Offering ALL of our writings, videos, events, healing offerings, and audio blogs for the week. Go read it here!

This week, SoulFullHeart teacher and Facilitator, Gabriel Heartman, penned a piece about relating to what you may have been calling your ‘depression’ for many years now, in a different way. He offers that working with the parts of you that feel and hold the depression gives you a new way to feel about it and a profound way to heal it deeply:

“It is time to treat it as an ally and a guide. A dynamic that is happening inside of you. Not ignoring it, but de-energizing the power of the word itself. It is a series and sum of feelings that have been balled up into a density that is extremely heavy. But when related to differently and with a willingness to feel those individual parts of it, will you then be able to get beyond its gravitational pull and into what it is meant to offer you.”

A few new writings are offered this week from Raphael and Jelelle Awen, Kalayna Colibri, and Gabriel Heartman, that digest current energy waves, sacred community, the ways in which we can relate to ourselves and our parts, and different ways to think about your spiritual and healing path.

You’ll find several new audio blog recordings as well.

Raphael, Jelelle and Gabriel offer 1:1 90min Bridging Sessions to help boost and digest your Ascension process and feel with you what your next steps are towards your highest timeline possibilities. These sessions are available for $77 USD min. donation per session. More information can be found here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/bridging-session

We love to share our offerings with you and would enjoy to receive whatever heart donation in the form of money you feel that resonates with our offerings. You can go to our donation page for more info on how to donate: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/donations

Thank you so much for your interest in and support of SoulFullHeart Way of Life! If you’d like to receive these Museletters directly and automatically in your email every week, you can subscribe on our website at: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/writingmuseletters

Check out the latest Museletter here.

From Living Room To Loving Room: Celebrating Sacred Group Process Space, Community Shifts And Changes

By Kalayna Colibri

At first glance, our living room is a mess, yeah? Well, if you could vibe yourself here to be in this room right now, the mess wouldn’t matter… this is the best room in Gabriel and I’s house right now. The warmth as I sit here and digest what moved between Gabriel and I as well as within us individually and within the hearts and souls of my other beloveds in this space today, I feel the warmth of the love container that held us all… the love energies coming from our hearts to our parts, our hearts to each other and each other’s parts. It’s a powerful energy to be in and around and not one that comes without cost, without constant and consistent choice, without courage and a deep trust within that love is carrying us to our next layers within and within relationship to each other too.

This was one of our last group healing spaces together before Jelelle, Raphael and Raianna go back to Canada, where we all came from 4 years ago, nearly to the day. It was a beautiful weekend of connection and process. It was a time of bittersweet celebration and abundance of love… digestions of our journey together so far and how much we are going to miss each other too.

We are choosing this next phase of separation so that Gabriel and I can build our kingdom together as a Sacred Union couple, an arising King and Queen. Jelelle and Raphael have their next phase of leadership too, moving on from this geography to be in a new phase of grist for their own processes and also to continue expanding our community. Raianna will be making connections of her own back in Canada too. In all cases, the intention holding all of it and all of us is to serve love… to ourselves, between each other, and with others. We ultimately want more of YOU to be able to access and experience what we experience together… the gifts and growth crucibles of soul family connections and the catalytic nature of this work.

So, a messy living room to some… but a warm LOVING room to me. And you’re all invited to take part in your next steps, feeling how they may even connect you more to us in the ways you’re ready for.

Follow along on all our Facebook feeds, our website (soulfullheartwayoflife.com) our blog (soulfullheartblog.com), our YouTube (SoulFullHeart Experience), and/or sign up for our free weekly Museletter on our website.

I wish you much love… from my heart to yours. ❤️

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart co-founder, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Navigating These Times Of Change And Upturned Feelings Inside

By Kalayna Colibri

During these days and moments of so much coming in and going on, the constant invitation is to surrender to the tornado of reflections and changes, trusting that you WILL land somewhere soft and grassy… these times of upheaval actually press us upward AND onward, while encouraging us to go inward.

The preciousness of parts of you can be forgotten in the everyday shuffle and the ongoing dreamings of what you want to experience, be, have next. The need to see and actually be with what is now can be challenging. The emotional and spiritual pain and distrust that parts of you hold can become buried, even in a life that is genuinely good. The gift of these ‘tornado times’ is that this pain can surface and be felt again, made space for, healed deeper, brought with you to that new place the Divine so wants to take you and IS taking you, even if you can’t feel the surrender or see the ground beneath your feet at the time…

This is the ongoing offer, invitation, love we are granted and flooded with.

As hard as it can be and often is in these moments of poignant and pure feeling, there is always a Divine hand being held out for us to grasp onto, that encourages the authentic YOU to hold a hand out for the parts that are struggling in their fears and suffering in their pain, seeing and feeling the worlds – their worlds – that are collapsing in so many ways, while they reach out for a ‘more’ that they need reminding is not only possible, but already here…

In this bittersweet time of movement… of upswing and downturn… we learn to shift the gears into place, taking all of our precious cargo of self and soul with us. Bringing it all to that ‘Promised Land’ within, that does want to take us to all that we most deeply want and work to feel worthy of.

~

My beloveds offer powerful session space for you to lean into if you’d like support through any changes going on and pain coming up: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/bridging-session

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart co-founder, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Full/New Moon Brings Divine Feminine Healing Balm

By Kalayna Colibri

Since this year’s Lion’s Gate portal event and all of these eclipses, it has seemed as if some things have become a bit more chaotic than usual, maybe. At least for some. It’s the chaos of life intensifying in some ways perhaps, in order to reflect the chaos inside. It’s the flurry of sudden life changes that are either desired or not, that reflect to you where you truly are in your healing and Ascension journey.

This last full moon has felt like a coming full-circle around inner process and understanding outer conditions and circumstances… why you’ve drawn what you have and chosen what you’ve chosen, consciously and unconsciously. The energy of this moon has felt like a welcome healing balm from the feminine. A chance to feel the dust settling now amidst the upturning of so much… a chance to feel how you truly are a phoenix now rising humbly from the ashes of all that has had to burn and be let go of.

The process of feeling the layers of who you’ve thought yourself to be is forever a humbling one and yet an activation too. Peeling back the layers of window-dressing, self-image concerns and construction, and finding who you are in your heart is a process of feeling the parts of you that have been invested in the hiding of your truest light. In this discovery of another authentic layer of you, there’s an automatic and unavoidable activation of your 5D/Service-of-Love Self. This is something that can’t be put on or certified, but lived and loved into.

If you find yourself and parts of you looking around at what has crumbled or has been in the process of crumbling recently in your life, the invitation from these feminine healing balm energies is to feel and trust how this process has been and is necessary… that nothing you are meant for can ever be truly lost, though this is so hard to feel in the middle of it all. The feminine can be felt through any face of the Divine Mother that resonates for you, and She in any and all forms is holding you now and always, making space for you and inviting you to make space for Her, for You, for Love.

Much love to you as you continue your own journey on this path into and through your deepest awakening experiences, which can feel like a fire in your living room… you are yet alive, you are always loved, and you are meant for all of those “mores” you have ever dreamed of… ❤️

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart co-founder, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

HIGH SOULar Winds Bring In Sacred Masculine Activations: SoulFullHeart Weekly Museletter (Aug 20, 2018)

It’s the release of our weekly Museletter! Offering ALL of our writings, videos, events, healing offerings, and audio blogs for the week! Go here to read it!

This week’s Museletter is launched by a powerful energy update from Jelelle Awen, talking about the different ways in which the sacred masculine within men and women is being activated by these incoming energies. She offers that the activation and healing of the sacred masculine is ripe now and that the energies of the masculine are needed too:

“There is much awe and reverence to feel in the powerful force that these energies are….they serve as a reminder of the powerful force that lies latent inside of each of US too. The masculine CAN do damage and be destructive and violent too….yet overly fixating on that expression creates a repeated, self-sabotaging cycle of its play out. Forgiveness of this abuse of power capacity in the masculine and genuine remorse from the masculine is possible as we connect with the masculine parts of ourselves that SO need our love.

These SOULar frequencies activate our sacred masculine, allowing for the collective healing and transformation of the wounded masculine that is MUCH needed during this phase of awakening. The wounded masculine is NOT just in men, yet in each of us, as embodied in our masculine parts in this timeline and from other timelines where we chose male bodies. This is truly a collective invitation to move into healthy masculine expression that each of us can personally take into our hearts, souls, chakras, and even physical bodies.”

This article is followed by the recording of the latest live stream/energy update and Q & A from Raphael and Jelelle Awen. They offer digestion of the incoming Ascension energies, the ongoing process of light body transformation and emotional body healing, as well as a celebration of new timelines coming in for themselves and for many others right now.

There are many new articles and audio recordings out this week from Raphael and Jelelle, Gabriel Heartman, and Kalayna Colibri, offering energy updates and ways to feel your own process around inhabiting more love inside of you and the service of love too.

Raphael, Jelelle and Gabriel offer 1:1 90min Bridging Sessions to help boost and digest your Ascension process and feel with you what your next steps are towards your highest timeline possibilities. These sessions are available for $77 USD min. donation per session. More information can be found here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/bridging-session

We love to share our offerings with you and would enjoy to receive whatever heart donation in the form of money you feel that resonates with our offerings. You can go to our donation page for more info on how to donate: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/donations

Thank you so much for your interest in and support of SoulFullHeart Way of Life! If you’d like to receive these Museletters directly and automatically in your email every week, you can subscribe on our website at: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/writingmuseletters

Check out the latest Museletter here.

 

Being With The Journey Of Loving Your Fear

By Kalayna Colibri

I don’t know how deeply I have ever truly appreciated the journey of loving your fear until now. It’s a whole other layer of awakening when we can get to this place of realizing that it even IS a journey… and of course it is… look at the intensity of what happens as we awaken into lower 4D frequencies specifically, where we start to feel and even experience the pain of the collective and ourselves too on a whole other bandwith… that alone is a lot to wade through and it can feel like learning to walk all over again to find our way into digestion and integration of these realizations and awakenings. Feeling and loving our fears is all part of the package in order to truly ascend past this stage.

As ironic as it may sound, it feels like one of our deepest lessons is surrendering into feeling our fears and not just “dealing” with them in order to “ascend”. Until we can really feel the fear, we can’t understand its reasons for being there and the parts of us that have truly held it as their dominant reality… and therefore, it doesn’t get truly transmuted and healed, just paved over, coped with, ignored, until we can no longer ignore it.

For me, there has been so much fear around self-image, around becoming invisible, about never feeling like I (or parts of me) are truly powerful in the way they and I most want to be… it becomes a process of feeling the fear that this is just always going to be true. That this reality is all that’s real. What I’m discovering though is that it’s the dropping of the veil around my fears that helps me feel how I have all the power I need in order to be with them and love them like there’s no tomorrow… and, feel the power there is in the surrender to just simply feeling and also letting go of or taking space from whatever/whoever necessary in order for the fears and anxieties to just take centre stage in my inner world until they can feel all the love they need to feel to start feeling something different.

As I briefly journaled before bed last night, I shared with a beloved guide of mine that I feel afraid of “going backwards” in my process, which really is a complicated fear actually, as there are a number of things wrapped up in this for me and parts of me. She offered simply that there is no “going backwards” and that this is actually too linear of a way to think about process. Instead, she offered that I can think of it as “going INward”.

I feel this as an aspect of my personal process right now yet felt to share it too, as I can feel an important reframe of the ways in which many of us may feel about process and moving through life. There really are no “setbacks”, just new journeys and chances to regroup and reboot, maybe also reevaluate the current course too. These phases are true gifts that help us all feel where we are most authentically at and who we would most like to become on the other side of the tougher inner spaces and processes.❤️

Much love!

~

My beloveds offer powerful, illuminating (and so affordable) space holding and facilitation if you’d like some support on your own journey through these themes and more… more info here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions ❤️

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart co-founder, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

How Do Parts Of You Relate To ‘Process’?

By Kalayna Colibri

Sometimes parts of you are more used to ‘the work’ more so than the reward. And at other times, parts of you may want to skip ahead to the reward without doing ‘the work’.

Energies right now and lately have been inviting us all to feel our relationship to personal process. Is the tendency to hold it with self-punishing energies and an intensity that often feels heavy, or is there a frequency of looking at the processes of others, wishing to only be where they are now without having to walk out your own steps?

I feel like one of the most challenging pieces here is self-embracement, which translates to a seeing and feeling of your parts on all levels. Sometimes Metasoul timeline bleedthroughs happen too, adding an existential element to all of this… and when you add that with some conditioning that love and deep inner healing and movements cannot happen without shame spirals and long-lasting phases of deep suffering and pain, then you have the perfect cocktail for parts of you to try and avoid process altogether.

The invitation to feel and heal is one that allows for all of this and more to come up, held by love. It’s an invitation into a more yin-feeling space of embracing instead of stifling and encouraging healing within instead of forcing it, much like a mother who is encouraging her child to start walking.

Learning to relate to your healing process differently is as important as the healing itself… it’s the choice of the sort of womb you’d like to bake in before your continual rebirth into someone new, even if these shifts feel subtle in the moment.

Much love to you as your journey unfolds with feeling all of this and so much more… and as you continue your own embracement of your process in these newly emerging ways from within. ❤

~

We offer powerful and illuminating Bridging Sessions that offer all of this and more for you to continue to feel into and heal too… http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/bridging-session❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 35, emoto-spiritual teacher, WayShower, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.