More Questions Than Answers: The Sacred And Necessary Journey Through 4D Into 5D Consciousness

Painting: ‘Unknown Terrain’ by Andrew Hem

by Kalayna Colibri

As we continue to move through 4D and find our way into 5D reality here on Gaia, there are so many more questions than answers, and there is a knowingness inside that hindsight truly is 20/20… meaning, sometimes we don’t and can’t know exactly what’s going on or where we’re heading until we’ve gotten there. There is a surmounting, ever-unfolding journey we are undertaking, fraught with mystery and entwined with conundrums. You find and claim one answer after another, only to ’round another corner and find another existential crisis awaits…

This is the experience of parts of us on this Ascension path. This is the experience within our Metasoul too and perhaps especially since there is so much karma held there, so many stories of other timelines and even galaxies and the happenings there. What is felt and experienced to be ‘the truth’ in one moment is then negated the next because of new discoveries within and in the world at large, too. There is so much mystery in this process of moving and ascending UPward, so much we cannot understand with our limited human energetic and verbal vocabulary, as it is right now. No wonder so many attempt to ‘figure out’ answers based in what their minds can learn. The heart though, the sacred, awakening and arising human heart, which is at the epicenter of our Ascension as a species, cannot learn through books and teachings alone and needs to experience… needs to feel… needs to let in and let go, too. So many answers are being revealed, starting from the inside, yet they need to be encouraged and supported from outside sources as well. Others who are walking this path alongside you. This is not meant to be an entirely lone wolf-based phase, this time of our Ascension. We are meant to do this together, be this together, find and feel the answers together, even if/when there is contention along the way, often held by parts or Metasoul Aspects of us not ready to let go into their truest vulnerability yet.

There is so much to learn. And are parts of us OK with not knowing our way through to this learning? This has been tricky to feel in this still predominantly patriarchal-based world and dimension, as the mind has been a prized possession and trophy, a sign of worth and power, for men and women alike. Over-reasoning has led parts of us down paths of deep hatred and fear, or a complete bypassing of much emotion at all. And then sometimes the mind gets a bad rap altogether, instead of being loved UP like any other part of our being and brought into our Ascension picture along with us. The mind is still needed, just perhaps not so relied upon, as its scope of the truthiest truths is limited at best.

The truth of Ascension lives at a personal level. It starts there like a seed, only to germinate with the right about of air, space, love. It grows with the questions, the navigation of choppy lower-4D waters, into the upper-4D flowing seas. It sways in the winds of new directions to go in, new places and parts to feel within, new physical geographies to inhabit. It is forever shifting, just as we are and are meant to. How we enter these phases of deep questioning and discernment is a show of active choice points and a foray into the unknown wilds of our human hearts which are at the core of our deepest healing processes and enlightenment/enHEARTenment opportunities.

And so, onward and UPward we continue, with all of our questions still burning brightly in the headlights and fuel tanks of our personal Merkabahs, somehow shining the way  and moving us along still, even if we can’t ever be totally sure where we are going… though it seems too, that as we inhabit even these difficult states of 4D-being and the reality of this for parts of us and move into 5D more and more, the questions become less important than the pure remembering that in the end, the details and ‘answers’ to our questions and quandaries matter far less than the return to our pure and deep understanding and kNOWingness, that we are now and will always ever be LOVE embodied in Sacred Human form. And reaching this state (even if it only lasts for moments at a time at first!) makes all of the journeying, all of the prior perplexed-ness so completely worth it. ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Re-Discovering And Loving The Buried Parts Within

by Kalayna Colibri

Many years ago… I could not have told you that ‘becoming more feminine’ was my goal or intention. I grew up with an older sister who rebelled against femininity and wanted to be like her. I wanted to be friends with the guys that weren’t attracted to me, so at least I could have some way to be close to them regardless, to experience a connection with the opposite gender. I say ‘I’ here because before I was aware that I had ‘parts’ of me running the show of my life, ‘I’ was all ‘I’ had as a reference point for the dramas and desires and pain.

When I was very little, however, I wanted only to wear dresses. I liked big frilly ones with flowers. I liked my pretty shoes and white tights. I especially loved going to ballet class as a 5-year-old and being able to wear the pink skirt that represented my level over top of my leotard. I loved being called a ‘lady’ and would have fantasies about being in ‘princess training’. This was all before messaging of ‘being a girl means you’re weak’ or ‘incapable’ started to leak in and take over. This was before parts of me started to form as a casing, an ever-hardening shell over my natural sensitivity and blooming pre-womanhood. The dresses got put away. The tights could no longer be worn without holes being made in them almost immediately – a symbol, I’m realizing, of my young torn-ness between gender expressions. Skirts didn’t fit or feel right either, and I felt very self-conscious in them. Something was shifting out of wanting to be a girl to wanting to be related to, to be made friends with, to be able to somehow find comfortability in any social situation even if that meant being more like a ‘boy’ in some ways. I stopped feeling ‘pretty’ when I was quite young and thus I stopped trying to be, at least until high school.

I remember all of this in this very moment, especially as I feel a part of me that is my Inner Masculine. I feel how this is a story from him about how he came to be and how he began to form as an Inner Patriarch, coaching and teaching my other parts how to become more masculine in order to survive if not thrive in this world of 3D. I feel the tears of my suppressed, albeit quite young aspect of my Inner Feminine, who it feels like has some pain coming up in response to this… these feelings of being ‘girly’, which was more in my true nature, being deemed ‘not good enough’ so early in my life.

I share this story today because it feels like the story that belongs to so many of us… a story of genuine self-expression, of authentic sensitivity. Unless and until we can begin to feel the parts of us that have (had to) come up in response to life and more often than not, bury or try to dismiss what is actually TRUE about us, it doesn’t really feel possible to feel the layers here and to get to exactly what has been buried for so many ‘years’.

I feel like this extends far beyond authentic gender expression, so much as just what is authentically in our hearts. I feel the richness of a genuine experience of what the sacred masculine and feminine ARE, that can only really be experienced from within, not from other people’s ideas of what it is or is not… in either case when it comes to the masculine and the feminine, we are having to re-learn so much and deeply feel much more.

We have the courage to venture deeper into our own healing, ever-discovering more and more of what has been suppressed within our most inner caverns of what has always wanted to show us the most authentic us we have been waiting and working to BE… and it’s up to us when and if we are ready to lead him/her/them out of the shadows and into the light where they can breathe and play and be themselves again… and this time, without anyone telling them they have to stop being who and what they truly are. ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Information Is An Invitation

by Kalayna Colibri

We are always downloading, integrating, feeling through information coming in, data parts of us area seeking, answers to questions that may or may not be the ‘right’ ones, but are answers for now, at any rate. Parts of us and Metasoul Aspects too, are searching and finding, seeking and hiding. We are feeling this in every moment as we move through life, embody our Ascension, and heal our way to a higher vibrational way of BEing in life (and in LOVE).

What we read, hear, digest, can only ever be an invitation. The mind looks for doorways and the soul seeks out the paths, sometimes even those that aren’t well-worn at all, yet have some sort of signposts showing a direction or two that can be taken. All of this though, this is all in invitation. And it’s up to us how, when or if we ever choose to wander in wonder through these openings.

There are so many who write and speak of what they feel they ‘know’ and with an energy of ‘this IS THE truth’ and ‘if you don’t believe this, you are doomed’ or worse yet, ‘you are one of THEM…’. It’s not the information or download itself that is in question, for we are all given data to digest one way or another, yet it is the charge with which we offer each other our insights and downloads that bears some transmuting from within.

I checked in with myself about this in meditation this morning. I checked with the Divine Mother too, my beloved guide and source of undying, absolutely infinite love and holding of my worth. She offered this piece about everything always being an invitation, for nothing can be forced. We cannot force each other to follow along with what we’re feeling and being, we can only invite and let go. We can only go inward if we feel something other than invitational energy coming from us towards others. This has been a big part of my personal process over the last several years, and I think for most if not all healers, this is a deep and necessary place to go. We are all gifted, so much so, and have such amazing abilities to tap into and share much that is based on what we are feeling, being downloaded, and above all, experiencing. To really take a sober look at where we are coming from when we do all of this, takes courage, a great deal of self-love, and a desire to deeply and truly love all of humanity.

“It can only ever be an invitation”… I feel these words ring so true and warm inside of me. I feel the freedom they offer, that She offers, from feeling confined to the knowingness of others. I feel the permission to lean into those teachings I feel are resonant, which for me means more and more that these teachings must come from a source that has done much inner work in order to truly and deeply ring true inside of me, and, I feel how this permission is really about an invitation to lean into myself, to feel more trust in my own ‘sources’ of information inside of myself, that are always available if I ask and intend to hear and feel them.

May all of this go into you and your own parts as an invitation, not a mandate. Wow, so this is basically an invitation into an invitation… that feels enlivening! ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Current Energies Empower Us To Feel Our Choices Within

by Kalayna Colibri

At any time, you get to push the ‘reset’ button. You get to start again. You get to wake up in the morning and realize that life can become new, can arise for you anew. That the people in your life can too. And that there are many choice points along the way that make this come alive and help YOU come alive again, too.

The only thing that seems to keep us from doing this, letting this in, is what we have still to feel inside of ourselves that really doesn’t trust these choices or see the possibilities in our daily reality. Parts of us that want a quick-fix, get frustrated when everything they’ve tried hasn’t worked or seemed to work (or at least not with any staying power), and then the bottom falls out of our motivation to be IN life… to be a vital part of each relationship we have, especially to ourselves. Or, parts of us get frustrated with simply not finding the solution, not feeling genuinely guided or templated for, not feeling comfortable to be in this skin we’ve chosen as a vessel for our 3D come 4D experience here on Gaia. And THEN the bottom falls out and we are left with quite a bit of inner flatness and apathy.

We get to choose. We get to choose to do and be something different, to have a new approach, to try a new way, a new lens too. We get to do all of this and perhaps that is the very essence of free will. We also get to choose NOT to choose, which is still very much a choice. We can opt-in to our inner power and do the work we need to within, or we can let parts of us continue to opt-out of this invitation to heal and continue on in the same patterns we and they have been used to.

We get to decide our approach to life and to healing. What we don’t really get to choose is how and why our pain surfaces, as this is a collaboration with life and the Divine that we cannot shake off, no matter how hard parts of us may work to keep activity and positivity in place. We get to choose our healing paths and whether or not we fully show up for whatever place we’re at in our lives. We get to lead or follow as much as we want to, as much as parts of us want to… for in the beginning of feeling your parts, you begin to realize how much of your life has actually been a result of the choices parts of you have made, and not necessarily choices the most authentic and raw YOU would make.

Whatever the array of choices are that you make in one day let alone one lifetime, the deepest choices are often the ones that help us look, feel, notice, and heal. These are the choices that don’t ever flatten us out but bring us closer to ourselves and the lives we have truly, most deeply been wanting to live and LOVE. To feel where and how these choices show up for you and within you today feels like the most important revelation you could take in and the biggest, most magical experience you could ever have. ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

PRACTICAL ASCENSION: 7 KEY AREAS OF LIFE – Spiritual Area Intro

by Kalayna Colibri & Gabriel Heartman

In this video, SoulFullHeart Teachers, Facilitators and Sacred Union mates, Gabriel Heartman and Kalayna Colibri, discuss the spiritual area of life and the different ways parts of every human being may relate to it on a 3D, 4D and 5D level.

Spirituality tends to be the main focus for many as we live into Ascension, and all too often at the cost of the other areas of life that really can’t help but be connected to it. As arising and healing Sacred Humans wanting to co-create and experience a New or Golden Earth experience, grounding into our spirituality and feeling all of the different ways in which parts of us have related to it, is an important step to healing towards this new reality starting from the inside. Kalayna and Gabriel invite you to feel the different ways that parts of you may relate or not relate to spirituality, how your awakenings may play out in your life, and what can happen if you ‘pop’ into 4D and 5D spiritual consciousness without taking steps to reconcile your wounding in other areas of your life and your spiritual or existential wounding too.

As Gaia continues her ascent into more 4D consciousness, Her inhabitants (us) are being shaken to the core and sometimes awakened without prior sense of this coming or conscious desire for it. Awakening can happen spontaneously or can be sought through other experiences, such as with psychedelics. Moving more into 4D spirituality often means asking many questions, beginning to feel that spirituality starts within and that the Divine is as much a part of us as we are a part of it. Tidy compartments put into place by parts of us that have tried to keep our spirituality separate from other areas of life are being broken open and it is becoming harder and harder to keep these compartments in place. This is all happening with love and is necessary for our spiritual evolution as a species… though the road can be long, winding, and sometimes quite dark and full of thorns too.

Sometimes the spiritual area of life is related to with so much over-focus that other areas of life are neglected and thus different parts of us are neglected too. In SoulFullHeart, we experience ever-deepening and expanding spiritual awakenings and consciousness shifts through deep-diving within and looking at all areas of life as they are meant to flow and grow together. If you would like to take in more writings and videos on this topic, you can visit our blog and also check out more of our Youtube channel, as this is inherent in what we embody on this healing path and where we go inside of ourselves as well as with facilitants as they begin to feel parts and Metasoul Aspects of themselves, too.

If you have any questions or comments, you can leave them in the comment thread here on the blog, on the Youtube video, or find us on Facebook (just look for Kalayna Colibri and/or Gabriel Heartman and/or SoulFullHeart Way Of Life!). You can also email soulfullhearts@gmail.com.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. 

 Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Ascension Invites Us To Feel Our Humanity And Serve Love With It Without Martyrdom, Self-Sacrifice

by Kalayna Colibri

We are learning to serve love, serve our fellow human beings in stride with love, through our humanity. This is why it can feel so hard sometimes to be around each other’s pain, let alone our own pain. So many attempts are made to bandage the wound instead of healing it because the sight of the festering is too much for parts of us to bear and reminds us intensely of our own places we still need to go. It can be a momentous effort to actually stay in the room with ourselves, let alone each other, and to try and offer any amount of love in that context can be so challenging for parts of us that really would rather try and not go there or look here.

There can be no ‘perfect healer’, at least not in human form, as far as I can feel it… we can work to become purer and purer channels of love through continued work on ourselves, in conjunction WITH service of others, which is actually the bigger mirror for us. We can be transparent and vulnerable with each other about where we are still needing to go inside of us, what shadows seem to be peeking up, what we have gone through and are walking out for the sake of our own healing. Perhaps one of the most beautiful things about our humanity IS our messes and our courage, our insurmountable, wonderful courage to just, keep, going.

I think we have been pre-disposed to going to battle, serving ‘god and country’ because we are actually quite wired for service, period, and instinctively know this, feel this, believe this! We are meant to be in the ‘trenches’, yet not in a literal sense… we are being called to the mistaken, old, worn-out battlefields within others to apply medicine of heart and soul balms. Yet we are called to our own inner worn-out battlefields first. Peace cannot begin to move through our world without this, without our efforts to heal our own hearts and not transcend them or ask anybody else to transcend theirs either. Humanity cannot begin to mature beyond this mentality of needing to fight, needing to ‘other’, needing to find opposition in order to find itself, without looking inward on an individual basis first.

The singular agenda for humanity as a whole feels like this piece of remembering that we are of service… and what this even means. What is service without martyrdom, without self-sacrifice, without climbing up onto a soapbox to shout at the obscene and unfair crucibles of the world, without going to war or battles? What does it mean to be human and still serve love from the deepest hearth of our hearts, admitting when parts of us feel fear, shame, sadness, anger, rage and finding the vulnerability in being with that? Sometimes loving others means setting boundaries. Sometimes healing others means allowing, showing them they have the power to heal themselves, with the genuine love and support that comes from authentic soul family/tribe connections and a heart-based connection with the Divine that is not theoretical but felt and experienced.

How to serve other human beings while serving our own selves and our own humanity is an unfolding quest, actually, and an unavoidable one at that. In SoulFullHeart, we offer parts work and this is what works so deeply for us, as everyone, even and perhaps especially the people we serve, are all reflections for us to take in, of where we’ve gone inside of ourselves, what we’ve already cleared and healed, and what we have left to clear and heal, too. Yet we are also always learning more and more what works best for us, who we are meant to serve, and how. I doubt there could be any human healer on this planet who isn’t meant to feel this humility of not always kNOwing what’s best for another soul, for this is what invites us all into deeper collaboration with each other and with the Divine, who is always working through all parties involved in the healing effort, finding, rediscovering and ultimately healing Itself back to wholeness too.

This all makes serving love as a human being a trial at times and rather challenging, yet we keep going into it because we know, we trust, that LOVE is worth it, that everyone on this planet (and beyond!) is worth it… that WE are worth it. We are heading in the direction of love with every feeling space given to ourselves and others, and with every ounce of our vulnerability we bring to ourselves and the world around us. We are goodness, we are Angelic, we are the ones here to move along with Ascension and love along with Ascension. We are of service. We are beacons. We are amazing. And so it IS. ❤

 

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

Practical Ascension: 7 Key Areas Of Life – The Inner Punisher (Emotional Area)

by Kalayna Colibri and Gabriel Heartman

 

In this video, SoulFullHeart Facilitators, Teachers and Sacred Union mates, Gabriel Heartman and Kalayna Colibri, invite you to feel the tones of your Inner Punisher/Critic. This part is intense to work with, as its name implies, yet it also opens out so much more love flow within and through you, from you to you and you to others. Kalayna and Gabriel both share about their experiences of working with and healing different layers of the Inner Punisher and what they have noticed through working with and supporting healing in others too. It is sometimes the hardest part to be with, at least at first, yet they are one of the parts that needs the MOST love!

In many ways, we are raised by the Inner Punisher and its frequencies in our caregivers/parents and other authority figures that we lean into growing up. This is a part that energizes much criticism inside of you towards parts of you, yet also towards others. As it heals, so does the energy with which your intuition and discernment comes as well. This part is a critical one to work with as a healer or ‘lightworker’, as its energies can very often leak out in unconscious ways towards those who you actually desire to support in their own healing. Feeling this part means feeling the often shadowy conditioning you were raised with and that has become naturalized in your life and culture. The other side of this process leads ultimately to deeper, more profound love and self-acceptance and a keen discernment about life that comes from love instead of fear. The many layers of the Inner Punisher that you would feel in your SoulFullHeart process are all worth it, as you begin to feel your genuine worth and love flow in a much bigger way than you would have otherwise!

If you have any questions or comments, you can leave them in the comment thread here on the blog, on the Youtube video comment thread, or find us on Facebook (just look for Kalayna Colibri and/or Gabriel Heartman and/or SoulFullHeart Way Of Life!). You can also email soulfullhearts@gmail.com.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. 

 Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Ascending At The Pace Of Your Growing Self-Love

by Kalayna Colibri

Sometimes it’s the baby steps that bring you the most into yourself and into healing, not to mention into an opening-out consciousness that expands and expands. There can be so much pressure coming from inside, especially perhaps from Inner Punisher parts of you, who like to sometimes make things seem as if they ‘should have’ been done yesterday, which is so based on deep conditioning taken in from being raised in a capitalist culture, where the wounded masculine rules and the RULES are what matter, not the heart, not the motive, not the roots of anything or anybody…

I feel to talk about taking smaller steps into our Ascension today, because even though in a way everything is being accelerated, it can feel at times like you are moving at a snail’s pace or barely moving at all. In fact, this judgment is one that comes from inside of you… from parts of you that are actually quite afraid of the natural momentum of it all and are having a push-pull experience, with some parts of you wanting Ascension and others not, and all for very good reasons too. If we feel a need to move faster, expand bigger, reach higher, and all in a way that goes beyond our current limits (self-imposed or not) we aren’t being self-loving and the boomerang effect of then needing to go back and redo or reinhabit different life phases along the way that parts of us have tried to skip is often in order as result. Ascension invites us to love ourselves into deep change that starts WITHIN and moves from the inside, out… not the outside, in. It invites us to let in the ways in which love has NOT been on the inner agenda and other energies have been settled for instead, especially in our relationships to each other and our relationship to ourselves and our parts.

There is no ideal pace in this ongoing process and in fact it feels like it is quite different for everyone. As you continue your inner healing, the anchors to 3D let go one by one in self-loving ways… the inner walls are dismantled brick by brick, while being held and honoured for all they have been needed to protect and keep sacred inside. As this all heals and lets go, the hot air balloon begins to more powerfully move us upward into organically arising moments of expansion in our consciousness and awareness of our multi-dimensionality!

There are so many ways and opportunities we are given to ‘pop’ into a new awareness or awakening experience. Some experience this in tremendous moments of momentum and others’ souls opt for the ‘drip line’ experience, where awakenings occur in some doses and in a way that is easy to digest. Some will have a mixed-bag in their ongoing process, as has been the case for me. Yet it all needs to be self-lovingly integrated or parts of you will go off the rails quite literally, which in some cases is actually what’s needed, yet the more self-loving we can be with this integration and the more tenderly we can hold our precious parts in the process, the better.

In a way, we actually owe it to parts of us, whose worlds we have dismantled and reassembled in many ways as we experience Ascension and deep healing processes, to really BE with them in all of this and give them the space to breathe around what they have experienced and what is being shaken up for them. Parts of you are what have made you, YOU… they have given you the gifts of personality and their increased sense of rest is what helps bring them back in, into integration with your heart and soul, which is ultimately not a part but an arising BEingness that can continue ascending in an authentic and ever-expanding way.

No matter if we choose the baby steps or the giant leaps, we are invited to feel ourselves, to be as self-loving as we can be in every moment, and to feel what that even means through a process of being with what HASN’T been the most self-loving response to life (or love!) inside of us. No matter what we choose, we are on a trajectory of healing and returning to the love that we are, so why not find ways to embrace every step, every part we encounter along the way, and find the fountain of self-love, reverence and appreciation that we are being pointed to on our very individual and powerful journeys?

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Awakening To Your Self-Worth Healing Process Within

by Kalayna Colibri

self-hug

Perhaps the deepest, most powerful, most emotional and yet also the most spiritual awakening we can have, is to how our self-worth has been measured within.

We were given these measuring tools by a culture fraught with pain and unworthiness. We were led here by caregivers and confidants, mentors and leaders. We were messaged from birth (in this life and other lives too) that our worth is dependent, conditional, finite, and above all, quantifiable. We are told subliminally, unconsciously, that we need to have, be, do, say, many different things that aren’t authentically us in our hearts. We are a species in incredible pain that goes deep. Even if you seem to consciously be choosing to ignore this inside of you, it’s still there. It lingers and pricks. It perks up when the opportunity comes, when it is safe enough to truly awaken to it, feel it, make space for it to continue arising.

It doesn’t matter how often some others may tell you, ‘there is nothing wrong with you’, when there is so much living in the buried basement of your heart’s cries for love, for a connection with All-That-Is, to genuinely feel One again with yourself, with the Divine, with everyone around you. Our separation and abandonment wounding lives fathoms deep inside of us and our parts. It lives and breathes within, it pops up whenever it can, and it does certainly inform your daily experience of life.

To truly find and feel our worth again, we must be willing to feel through the process of it… to be with the parts of us, the pain, the anguish, and the anxiety which all make up our experience of not truly having our worth intact. The fact is that we could never lose our worth… yet to deeply feel it and live from it is a whole other choice that involves feeling what ISN’T it and making room to feel all there is to feel about that.

To be in this process is to slowly begin to come home to yourself in a way you’ve never imagined. And once you get there, you realize that the light was left on for you by your soul and your infinite Divine connection that never left you. YOU truly ARE the love you and your parts have been searching, waiting, aching for. And when this can really be let in, nothing else matters but making sure that you have the things, people, relationships, intentions, that truly reflect this worth and love back to you. It is worth all of the inner-mining and the years of deep-diving within. It is worth it because YOU’RE worth it and the love you are meant to serve is worth it too. ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Current Energies Invite The Collective Into An Emerging 4D Reality

by Kalayna Colibri

Earth-Magnetic-Field

 

It feels like there is much discomfort emerging now, in different ways. There is a sense of these energies leading up to the Super-Blue-Blood Moon, that they are rumbly, shaking the well-known ground within and around us, moving us to new places of desire, new places of growth, re-awakening us in short yet intense tremors to what we came here to do, be, offer. The configuration of our lives as we have known them is being shifted now, shaken up WITH these energies in collaboration with our souls and hearts. For many, it could be a time of crisis, where realizations of true soul purpose and reason for being here are uncovered and initial steps, which can be quite painful in some ways, are inhabited in order to fulfill this purpose and calling. This phase feels so like the chrysalis, as Jelelle Awen has been offering. The phase just before the emergence of a brand new butterfly. So much congestion in the bodies, spiritual, physical, emotional, even astral, are all intensifying as they clear now, and all are asking us to continue looking and working inward, wrapping ourselves and our parts in love, being in the process of letting in and trusting love again.

It’s a continuous map of birth canals, this Collective experience of 4D reality landing in all of us more and more. We need these birthing pains so that we can feel the Love holding it all. We are finding our way through the inner mazes, opening up to shifts, feeling the press of that which still needs to be felt, healed, shifted inside.  We are being invited into patience with this process, as the Divine has infinite patience for it too. Layer by layer, contraction after contraction, we have so much still to feel and let in. So many reflections of ourselves, our parts, who we/parts of us have chosen to be throughout different phases of our lives, and we are awakening evermore to the feeling that there’s so much more we CAN and WILL be.

The brevity and gravity that has been 3D reality… the pain, the anguish, the abuses suffered… these bear down on parts of us until they start to feel, led by a growing YOU, that they are worth so much more. This is a much more challenging process than repeating affirmations, though I do not wish or feel to knock that if this is needed, as there is, of course, huge power in positive thoughts. Yet we all need to continue watching for any overriding of the pain within. The pain will move and heal with love and attention, as it is meant to. There is a lot of trust needed for this process to truly take hold, and that in and of itself is a process that cannot be bypassed, for there are so many reasons that parts of us have, especially our Inner Protectors, to not trust anything or anyone, let alone Love itself…

As our congestions clear in all bodies, we begin to breathe new air. We begin to let in more love, more self-worth, more sense of compassion towards ourselves, our parts, and towards others too. We move through what has been painful to feel, being with the congestion for a while, until it clears with love and care. With purpose and desire. With discernment in this 4D phase where the 3D reality continues to fall away and embracement of new paths, new ways of thinking and being are knocking at our heart doors. The collective awakening is here, rippling through in dynamic waves, and there is much to navigate, yet the Ark built in your heart is the one that will see you through it all. ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.