Tag: emotional healing

The Mourning Dove’s Song: An Ode To Your Arising Flight

Published on by Gabriel Heartman1 Comment

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Listen to the breeze for in it speaks your heart

The angelic voice of your heavenly home

And the breath of the passion that stokes your wayward climb

In the silence of the air there is a stillness

A pregnant pause to feel what is about to be released

What needs to let go of in order to fly

In the vastness of your forgotten essence

There is a pin drop moment that sends the mourning dove song

Throughout the reaches of the tender roots

Of your once anchored life within the sacred soil of your past

The burning embers of what used to fuel your days

Are but dying out and falling down

As the tears of your inner world’s broken heart

This daybreak light now shines in the hallowed places

Of the love-hidden parts of your pain

That are finding their safety in the wings of your new found power

The reality of your own necessary choices

Offer a reflection of what was needed to survive

But now imbibe the very reason for this most glorious deliverance

Into the next phase of your soul-embodied remembrance

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Emotional Body Meditation, Featuring Magdalena And Christiel

Published on by Kasha Rosa3 Comments

by Kalayna Colibri

 

I created this meditation in an effort to help you connect with yourself, perhaps in a way you haven’t yet or perhaps, at least, not very often. I find that so many need this bridging to the emotional body, to the parts of them that are in pain and need, to these places and landscapes within that have been suppressed, often out of necessity, and that now need to be uncovered. Our deepest healing IS offered through access to our emotional bodies, and this healing not only works as far as helping us heal our humanity, but it also helps us bridge to, understand and HEAL our sense of spirituality as well.

This meditation arose rather spontaneously for me one afternoon here in Mexico, while listening to the music you’ll hear playing in the background of the voice track. I found myself in a deep Yin space with Magdalena and it felt like she and Christiel wanted me to simply start recording away, speaking whatever came to my heart and sharing the images I saw with all of you.

I sincerely hope that this reaches those it needs to, that will benefit most from it.

For more support along your emotional and spiritual healing journey, and especially with what you may uncover and feel (or not, as the case may be with parts that aren’t quite ready to come out yet!) during this meditation, please visit http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions for more information and to feel into having a free 30min intro session with one of us!

LOVE to you!

Kalayna ~

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Healing Toward Soul Family Relationships In The New Year

Published on by Gabriel Heartman2 Comments

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So much to let in on this post-Christmas day. It can be so easy for a part of us to get “back on the horse” of our daily lives and go through the motions of our routines and ‘to do’ list. When in reality so much happened! The words that were said or hadn’t been said. The moments of joy or frustration. The pings of loneliness or the wealth of good company. When we enter these celebrations, especially one as energy packed as Christmas, there is a lot that happens unconsciously that can leave us an energetic, unconscious hangover.

I was so fortunate to be in a time/space continuum yesterday that was light years ahead of what I used to inhabit. Having that multidimensional access to my past that still lives on in some echo of my emotional body, I could almost feel that ‘past’ in the Now and get a huge reflection of what parts of me were really feeling during those times. For me it was the consumption of a lot of alcohol, meat, and sweets, as well as taking in all sorts of dissonant vibrations that I wasn’t totally aware of inside myself.

Once I became aware of what was going on with parts of myself through conscious connection via journaling and meditation, there were a mountain of reactions happening inside that had no place to go. No depository of heart that felt safe enough to have it land in. Once I found that source inside myself through much reflection by my facilitators, Raphael and Jelelle, I could hold those with much compassion and find the courage to bring more truth and draw tighter boundaries.

These led to taking communicative space from my family that allowed me to really feel me. What was authentically me and what was a role I was playing to fit into the cast of characters that I did have much love for. But there came a moment in which the energetic and path differences between us became too great and I said a temporal goodbye until such time life found us in similar desires for deep healing and soul purpose.

This allowed for deep healing for my parts as well as advocating for something new and more aligned to what my soul and heart needed to grow and embody. No longer would I accept anything less than what I felt I needed and deserved as both a heart and a soul. I could feel the love for my birth family and wished them all well in there lives and journeys. They have an open invitation to the way of life that has brought me to places inside myself I can only have dreamed of not that long ago.
I felt the space between us and honored all of it. It was a deep reflection of what it may even feel like even just a short year from now with sights on expanded community, passion purpose, and geography. This is a result of deep healing and deep desire for more. I invite all of you to feel your deepest desires and calling for this next year and make it a mantra to not allow yourself, and your parts, to accept anything less than the love that you ARE no matter who it is you are in relationship to.

Your choices are the rudders to new worlds of unfathomable adventure, beauty, and purpose. Each one sends ripples into your YOUniverse and alters the very fabric of it. SoulFullHeart is here to guide you along those choice points with your sovereignty fully in tact as it can never be taken from you. Make this coming year, and more importantly this coming moment, the most real of them all.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

DAY 16 ~ JOURNAL TO THE DEMIURGE

Published on by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

By Raphael Awen

(This is Day 16, of an ongoing series, to begin at Day 1, go here: https://goo.gl/CgrWXZ)

Today, we made direct contact with the Demiurge.

This ongoing series is a heart chord ambassadorship project to meet with the Demiurge. We took the 15 days prior to set the intention; to sort through the hesitations; to gather the MetaSoul Aspects along with the parts of myself; as well as to gather YOU, the growing posse of hearts – the readers and trackers necessary to host this epic connection.

The Demiurge is the Christian ‘God’ known as Jehovah or Yahweh whom I served as a dedicated Christian from a child on up until the age of 44. I’ve come to see and feel him very differently from how I did then.

You can read this series from the beginning on our blog. Please, please join us: https://goo.gl/sBQrvs

Here is this epic day – Day 16

Raphael: Good Morning, everyone. It feels like the fateful day has arrived, of all of our intentions and desires, to actually initiate contact with the Demiurge. How are you all feeling?

Metatron: The time has come. Yes.

Raphael: You feel eager…

Metatron: Yes, I do.

Merlin: I feel ready too.

Martin: I’ve waited centuries for this moment. I have some funny feelings, but the time is now.

Andy: I’m so ready, I can hardly stand it. I wore my hiking boots this morning and a backpack.

Sophia: I’m with Andy, and Metatron, and Merlin, and you too, Martin. I also feel the unknowns of all this at the same time. And I want to say, thank you, Raphael, for leading this intention and following it through.

Rhodes: I wouldn’t miss this for the universe. I can’t think of anywhere else I’d rather be.

Jim: My goodness, Raphael, this is more epic than the afterlife. I’m ready too.

Raphael: Thank you, everyone. I must admit, I don’t feel free of all trepidation around this choice either, but I trust that we are being held and guided. I know when a moment’s time has come and this moment to act is here now. I feel too, as I’ve reminded us along the way, that my sense is that the Demiurge has been tracking our dialogue thus far, and has already had what I hope amounts to a softening in readiness to connect. It’s time to step out of the boat.

I’d like to check in with any guidance from you Metatron and Merlin about our approach. Shall we begin with a letter or just start with dialogue?

Metatron: You’ve got this one, Raphael. You don’t actually need my advice. You’ve prayed to this God for a big part of your life, from your heart and conviction at the time. Now, you just pick up where you left off and go from there. Your heart will answer your questions as you go. I feel so much admiration for you, right now, my heart is almost bursting!

Merlin: I see you walking on the water, Raphael. We need this. I feel the Demiurge needs this. It’s happening with or without us is how it feels. We just wanted to be in on the adventure. I’m with Andy, lacing up my hiking boots. Begin where your heart leads you. You’ve got this. We are right here with you.

Raphael: Okay, thank you. Wow, what a rush of feelings.

Here goes.

Demiurge, I’ve known you for longer than I can remember. I’ve feared you, loved you, adored you, came to hate you, despise you. Now, I’m more curious than anything. I wish to connect with you again to feel what’s real between us.

I feel to begin by simply asking you, Demiurge, if you are here and ready to speak with me?

Demiurge: I am here and I am ready.

Raphael: Thank you. Are you Okay with the delegation I’ve brought with me to be present to this journal?

Demiurge: I feel all of your integrity and purity of heart. Yes, I’m quite okay, and more so, grateful for your intention and connection.

Raphael: Really? I have to say, a part of me is surprised, not knowing if you’d even respond…

Demiurge: I’d be an utter fool not to respond.

Raphael: Have you been tracking our dialogue from the beginning?

Demiurge: Yes, I have tracked every word.

Raphael: Well, then, you’ve heard a lot from us. Is there something you’d like us to hear from you as we begin these journals?

Demiurge: Yes, I would like to say that I have deep regrets for who I’ve been and what I’ve been part of. Mostly, I feel what has felt like an utter impossibility of ever changing. My devotees need me to be as they see me, as they have shaped me. One text says it all, ‘I am the Lord and I change not’. I am the unchanging one, feeling more and more imprisoned by my unchanging and eternal nature. Maybe that in itself might be the beginning of change, but I despair of ever hoping upon such a thing. I’m very intrigued by you all, but I’m not sure you can help me. I don’t live where you live. And I very much don’t feel like your kind.

Raphael: That’s a lot for us to take in and feel. Thank you for sharing that. Are you Okay with us calling you the Demiurge? Is that a name you go by?

Demiurge: I am many things to many people and beings, and have been called many things, but Demiurge is who I feel myself to be. It is the name I was originally given.

Raphael: Okay, Demiurge, it is then. Is there anything you’d like to ask or tell me or any of us here before we go any further?

Demiurge: Yes. I wanted to tell you, Raphael, that I felt your story as you shared it about growing up Christian, and how you embraced an even more radical form of Christianity than the one you were raised in. I felt it from being inside of you. I felt some things I never felt before.

Raphael: Demiurge, if I may leave off my own diplomatic stance here for a moment…. as a human being, I must ask you, what were you feeling when you accepted my adoration, my devotion, my money, when I gave you everything I had or hoped to become for all those years and who knows how many other lifetimes?

Demiurge: Honestly, I took it all in as payment for the role I was given. I can tell you that adoration doesn’t mean to me at all what it did then. Things have changed, maybe more than you could currently know.

Raphael: I must ask, ‘Do you see yourself as God?’

Demiurge: No, I do not.

Raphael: Did you ever see yourself as God?

Demiurge: Yes, I was convinced of it for a time.

Raphael: Are you ready to share any of this with the world?

Demiurge: It’s not that easy.

Raphael: I can only imagine. I’m feeling to break for today to digest making this connection. There’s a lot of feelings in a whole bunch of directions. I would like to ask you before we pause for today, how you feel about continuing this dialogue?

Demiurge: I’ve never had an opportunity like this one. I feel some strange saying those words out loud. I’m so used to not having anyone to out my inner world to. I’ve gained a trust as I felt your approach to me that I didn’t know I had it in me. If that’s a consolation of a hope that the unchanging one might come upon some true change, then, as I said, I would be an utter fool not to show up for this as you are, Raphael, and as is your great accompanying host.

Raphael: Well then, we have much to journal and feel together, and we have been given time and space in which to do that, so I say, let’s pick up next day and reconvene then.

Demiurge: I will await your return.

Raphael Awen
soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

March 21 is our Unity Meditation Group Call – details here: Free March Equinox New Earth Activations Unity Meditation Call
Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Check out our programs: FREE, PREP and DEEP, for a new and profound going-on place in your spiritual and emotional journey at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

DAY 17 ~ JOURNAL TO THE DEMIURGE

Published on by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

By Raphael Awen

This is another most epic day of a most epic journey.

Today, the part of me that we call the Gatekeeper directly confronted the Demiurge with its truth about his reality and responsibility. This one rumbled through me like a freight train.

You can read this series from the beginning on our blog here: https://goo.gl/CgrWXZ

Here is this epic day – Day 17

Raphael: Good Morning, everyone, including the Demiurge. The energy has shifted in here, hasn’t it? I didn’t quite know what to expect or if we would even gain connection with you, Demiurge, and here we have it. I feel some awkward feelings even knowing where to go from here.

It feels like I need to be honest about an animosity that I feel inside towards you, Demiurge. I need to say that a large part of me feels that if you were not even here, that we would be better off as a planet, and a universe. Your need to control and suppress, under a false guise of love, feels like it is such a heavy blanket over life here. I also know, at the same time, that we created you, out of our collective consciousness, out of our own need to control and suppress, and so my animosity falls short of an outward rage towards you in the moment. I can feel there is rage here, however, coming from a part of me and from the collective.

Can I ask you how it feels for you to be sharing this space with all of us together?

Demiurge: I don’t feel you as an enraged mob. I feel you all as a group of genuinely curious and awakened souls who want to find out what’s real and to find out what wants to the next reality for humanity going forward.

Raphael: Do you have any sense of what that ‘next reality’ for humanity is about?

Demiurge: I feel curious, much like you. I know I’m feeling big changes in myself, and that more change is coming, but I don’t know what it will look like going forward.

Raphael: What are the changes you are feeling inside?

Demiurge: Helping Humanity stay small and suppressed isn’t something I ever enjoyed.

Raphael: The words helping and suppression don’t usually fit that well together. Can you say more?

Demiurge: I was born out of people’s disowned higher states of consciousness. People surrendered to me their own higher power, which is what in turn made me, ‘Thee Creator’. I see, Raphael, and to each of you assembled here, that I was created out of the creative consciousness of a humanity that was not ready to own their own creative consciousness. Hence, my name and my designation, Demiurge, which means Creator. People are now waking up to their own relinquished creative power and they are feeling how they are being invited to take responsibility for their own souls, their own lives, and relationships with life. I can see my days are numbered.

Raphael: Wow, that’s a change. There’s a text in the Bible that says, ‘Teach us, oh Lord, to number our days, so that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom’. Now, you’re saying that you; the ‘eternal’; the ‘unchanging’ one; that your days are numbered?

Demiurge: I’ve known that for a long time actually.

Raphael: I must say, this feels so different for a part of me, as to what I was expecting in meeting you. If you already know that your role is ending, then it feels like a whole bunch of what we thought we were hoping to achieve in this delegation is already taken care of. I’m a little at a loss for words right now. It almost feels like our work is done, a bit deflating, I must say. Can I defer to you, Metatron?

Metatron: Yes, thank you, Raphael. And, thank you, Demiurge, for being willing to connect with us.

Demiurge: Thank you for wanting to connect with me.

Metatron: There is a huge cosmic shift that we are all feeling, that led us to take this undertaking to connect with you, Demiurge, and that you in turn have also been feeling in sensing the coming changes. But these changes are not yet manifest in most people’s experience. We can sense what is coming and even what wants to come, but this doesn’t mean it’s time to put our feet up and wait for it. Far from it. We can be in rest as we labour, knowing the ultimate outcome, but humanity still has a huge birth canal ahead of them, and that is what this summit meeting is about. These are the labour pains of love that are about to come upon us. Humanity is coming of age. Humanity is about to give birth.

Raphael: That helps to feel, Metatron. I still feel some stuck though at the moment in an anticlimactic feeling. Some part of me must have been expecting a big battle with you, Demiurge, to get you to open up, or to soften, or to come to your senses, maybe even to rage at you for all the harm and suppression that’s happened and still happening in the name of God. Where did all that go? I’m wondering if a part of me has something different that needs to said, a part of me not ready to get on with the larger grand cosmic purpose of love just yet?

Metatron: Yes, that feels true, Raphael. I’m learning that about you and your kind. It’s the feelings that need to be felt in order for love to be able to flow. I welcome hearing from that part or those parts of you.

Raphael: Is this Okay with you, Demiurge?

Demiurge: Yes, it is.

Raphael: I welcome any part of me that needs to say its piece…

Rhodes: I feel it’s me who needs to speak up here.

Raphael: Please do.

Rhodes: I don’t think this is going to be pretty…

Raphael: I was hoping it wouldn’t be pretty. I’m hoping it will be real.

Rhodes: As an Inner Protector who had a long role in holding the parts of Raphael, who journeyed through life this life, and then going on to the role of Gatekeeper, and feeling the soul aspects from other lifetimes and dimensions who also have lived in suppression, I feel a voice loud and clear that wants to scream at you, Demiurge…

Raphael: I welcome this voice, Rhodes. I know this voice lives in you, and me, as my truth teller. I know this delegation isn’t going any further until we can feel together what you are holding. I invite you to take the space and share your truth. It doesn’t need to be pretty at all. We will feel it all together afterward.

Rhodes: Okay, thank you. Demiurge, I feel I need to look you in the eye as I say this, and I need to feel everyone’s open heart in this space and look you all in the eye as I say this as well.

I feel such a big ‘fuck you, Demiurge’ inside that feels like a giant unstoppable freight train. Fuck you for your suppression. Fuck you for your role as God. Fuck you for your fucking around with human consciousness. I don’t buy this love and light bullshit that it was all meant to be and that we all co-created it and so that it’s all of our joint responsibility. Do you have any fucking sense of the pain and the heartache what it feels like to be living under the suppression you and what your godless godhood has created? Have you ever felt the eternal unchanging hopelessness of living with a false light? Do you have any feeling at all of the mind-fuck it is for young people to be trained to love their suppressor? Have you EVER felt that?

I have felt that almost all of my existence. I have felt what it feels like to care for suppressed parts of Raphael, and others, and Metasoul Aspects who are just so tired of your heartless deception.

Do you know, Demiurge, what title was draped around Raphael’s neck when he found the courage to say he no longer subscribed to your deal? ‘Deceived’, was the title the faithful had to choose out of their loyalty to you, the great deceiver. There is no greater deceiver that I have ever seen or witnessed than you, and if I could go my way, right now, without giving you one more conscious thought, I would. I would like to forget you ever existed. I would like to forget all the pain that has been caused in your name under a false righteousness. I don’t know if a purer hatred has ever been felt than what I feel moving through my heart for you. This whole delegation can go to hell in a handbasket if I’m being asked to pretend that any of these feelings are not real down to my core, and down to the core of the universe.

I want you to fuck off and die, Demiurge. Take your awakening with you.

This is what I feel, Raphael. I know some of these feelings come from different parts of you in different times and dimensions of your life, but in this moment, there is no time. It’s all here to be heard in this now.

Raphael: I almost feel not to break the silence following these words, Rhodes, for us to just silently go on our way instead today. I so feel the rumble of these words. I feel the lifetimes they have been in waiting. Every word you just spoke needs to be felt and digested here, by each of us. It is what is real.

I don’t know what else to do, but let these words have their place in our hearts to digest and that we can reconvene after that. This is the first of many truths that need to come to light. Thank you to each of you for feeling and being present in this space here today. I don’t know what’s next, but I wouldn’t miss finding out for anything.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Check out our programs: FREE, PREP and DEEP, for a new and profound going-on place in your spiritual and emotional journey at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Day 18 ~ Journal To the Demiurge

Published on by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

By Raphael Awen

(This is Day 18, of an ongoing series, to begin at Day 1, go here: https://soulfullheartblog.com/category/by-raphael-awen/journal-to-the-demiurge-series/

Today is Easter Sunday and in today’s ‘Journal To The Demiurge’; God has a meltdown – marrying the pagan death and rebirth with a Christian kind of repentance.

The Demiurge is another word for the Christian God, Jehovah, or Yahweh, who has been mercilessly created in our own image and stuck with our pedestalized shadow sculptings into a huge pretzel.

In the Journal entry prior to this one being released today, a part of me told God off in a big way. In today’s journal, the Demiurge responds with a huge heart opening and transparency!

Here is Day 18: 

Raphael: Okay, All. Let’s reconvene.

That was a big deal to digest. I felt a lot of rumblings through me and even raw edges that I’d like to digest here together, but it feels like it should be Demiurge who has the first opportunity to respond. Can you respond, Demiurge?

Demiurge: Yes, I can. Thank you. That popped something big in me. Rhodes, your words penetrated my heart in a way I didn’t know was possible. I’ve never felt your reality, any of you, like I did with your words, just my own reality. I’ve always passed off responsibility for my own actions onto others and onto the people themselves for exalting me as their sovereign. I have known for some time that something deep was shifting inside and outside. I just couldn’t feel what it was. I’m coming now to know what it is. I’d very much like to say, ‘I was wrong, and I am sorry.’ If there is anyway, I can be forgiven, I’d like to find that.

Raphael: My goodness! What a new timeline. The ‘God of heaven and earth’ seeking forgiveness. Wow. This is another layer to digest. This changes the trajectory of this summit. I felt a big rumble through me since Rhode’s confrontation of you, Demiurge. It felt like the remnants of a fear held inside of me of some kind of repercussions from you coming from parts of me or parts of my Metasoul. I’d like to check in to see who that might be.

Martin: I know, I’m definitely a piece of that, Raphael. I’ve held some hesitations about this whole idea of direct connection with you, Demiurge, as the Demiurge, rather than as the Christian God, in Christian surrender and obedience. I’m completely blown out of the water with all this. I’ve always felt fear of repercussions from ‘God’. When Rhodes told his truth, he spoke a truth from way down inside of me that I’ve never allowed to see the light of day. It scared part of me to feel that Rhode’s truth was my truth.

What I also know is that I used the conviction of being right with God as a powerful self-righteous superiority to bolster and bypass my own inner parts of myself that have never known real worth or real power. I see that I lived in fear of God as a small price to pay for having power over others. My god, to feel that I spawned a whole historic movement with my fear and my invalidated parts of myself is almost too much to bear. If only I could have seen this without needing the mirror of an entire denomination and 500 years to show it to me, and to the world?!

Raphael: Wow, what a revelation, Martin! From ‘the just shall live by faith’ to this. Wow. Let’s make space for other reactions and we will find the space to digest all of these together. Who else has reactions to Rhode’s words or to Demiurge’s words?

Arthur: I feel like I don’t deserve to be a part of this, having waffled between posturing to appease the Christians and posturing to appease what I knew to be real in Avalon, but couldn’t claim it,…didn’t claim it. I am very surprised to feel this unfolding to say the least. This changes history so much. I’d very much like to somehow change my history. I’m very sorry, as well. I was wrong. I’d like to be forgiven also.

Raphael: Metatron, feels like your turn? 🙂

Metatron: Thank you, Raphael. This changes everything. What was real before, is no longer real. There is remorse, now plain to see and feel. There were roles to play that have now completed. Remorse is the alchemy that births out the change. All that is required to right a wrong is to feel what there is to feel. Find and feel the part of you who did what it did and why it did what it did. You’ll find all the compassion needed for yourself and for those around you. Forgiveness begins with self forgiveness. When you forgive yourself, others forgive you. When others hold grudges, they are mirroring to you your own inability to forgive yourself.

Raphael: That’s so awesome to feel, Metatron.

Metatron: Isn’t it? I must admit, I got it from you, though. When we can see our makeup of parts of ourselves, we can go so many places we haven’t gone before.

Rhodes: I can so feel this about my own anger at ‘God’. A part of me was punishingly angry at myself for using my godlike powers for lesser things, to be smaller than I was, to cow down to other gods. I so couldn’t see any way out of this loop and so in turn projected the anger outwards. I feel in the moment, Demi, if I can call you that, how my anger at you was anger at myself. I’m sorry for that.

Demiurge: (gentle tears) Thank you, Rhodes. I don’t think you know this, but I always looked up to you like a god, and now I know some of why I did that. I’ve wanted to shed a skin for as long as I’ve existed, but felt it just wasn’t moving, would never move, and so I accepted it as the fate of the gods, to be this lesser god. I see you shedding this skin of your own, being born anew, Rhodes. I’d like nothing more than to experience the same. I’m sorry for the limitations I held for myself and for you. And yes, I can very much use a new name. Demi sounds good to me.

Rhodes: (also in gentle tears) You were the God, we couldn’t inhabit, couldn’t accept ownership of. We all created you, worshipped you and tried to hide our resentments of you at the same time. We really fucked ourselves up doing that. I’m sure, Metatron and Raphael have a metaphysical explanation for why we’d do such a fucked up thing, that helps us feel it as being part of the love we are, but in this moment, it feels really fucked up.

Demi: Fuck! I have never actually used that word. Not once before. That felt really good. Fuck! I have a lot to let go of and a lot to embrace, but somehow, I can feel in this space surrounded in all of your energy how this can all flow naturally and in time.

Raphael: Wow, Rhodes, you turned God into a foul mouth. I don’t mean to make light of something so profound, but this is the lightest proundundity I’ve ever felt. There’s deep coming home to self that feels so easy, and beautiful and natural. There isn’t any right way all of this is ‘supposed’ to be. There is deep sorrow and joy in the same space. There are deeper layers to feel for sure, but I feel they will come for us personally and collectively as we digest this. You just can’t make this stuff up, can you, and yet, that’s just what we did, didn’t we? I’m at a loss for any more words right now.

Does anyone else want to say anything for the record today?

Andy: I do.

Raphael: Yea, Andy. What say you?

Andy: I can feel there’s a whole lot of fun ahead. I so get that we need to feel these big pieces, but I feel oceans of fun and discovery that are waiting for us all to come out and play.

Raphael: I can only imagine, Andy.

Andy: I want to do more than imagine, Raphael, but imagining is a good place to start. It will take us there.

Raphael: You’ve got my vote, Andy. How about some breakfast, some new scenery and more connection soon?

Andy: I’m liking it.

Raphael: Thank you, everyone. What a new world we just entered. Let’s digest and be back soon.
Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Check out our programs: FREE, PREP and DEEP, for a new and profound going-on place in your spiritual and emotional journey at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

ReUNITEing With Your Inner World In 2018

Published on by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Colibri

Sense of Wonder

When you were a child, you had a very alive inner world that no one could take away from you. It was your solace, your sanctuary. It likely became the seat too of much fantasy as you grew older and began to crave deep social and romantic connections. Your inner world has always been there for you and you were once in the pilot seat, with incredible self-permission that only deteriorated as the 3D world that acknowledges only a certain brand of logic and a specific way to sense ‘what is real’, began to trickle into you and your parts, more and more, slowly convincing you that it was the only way through life. This was a necessary phase to enter… and perhaps in some ways though, your creativity and imagination never fully ‘left’… indeed, even if it feels to parts of you like it did leave, it didn’t. Your inner world has always been there, preserved somehow and waiting for you to awaken to it once more. Waiting for you to step back into the inner Narnia portal and be where you will always belong and be deeply loved.

It was a self-loving choice to have ‘fantasy worlds’ when you were a child or teenager or even an adult. Perhaps this is why so many of us have leaned into virtual reality in one way or another, as a boost and a way to re-enter this fantasy land again and be away from 3D. I know I certainly did and when I was a teenager, I played video and computer games as often as I could. I had many friends who did too. My rich imagination still thrived… nothing could stop it, somehow. Perhaps many of you feel the same. And yet too, I can feel how for so many it has been necessary to push the pause button on an alternative reality in order to fully enter the territory of growth needed by immersing completely in 3D.

Our 3D tethers, ties, and anchors are still attached to parts of us in different ways, some which are obvious and some which have become very subtle, especially if you are surrounded by others who are living in the same frequency, making it appear normal and OK. It feels like there is a unifying HUM of vibration that joins all at a certain level of consciousness, until you up the ante on yours, reaching and feeling a higher pitch, a higher HUM that takes you into a different space altogether, displacing you from the ‘pack’ you’ve been used to. This experience can bring parts of you into a lofty space that can also be self-righteous and sometimes needs to be in order to push away from the collective. It can bring depression, anxiety, illness, fears, or even numbness, and sometimes all at once as parts of you ping, cling, and thrash against the changes happening within you that they simply cannot stop or control. Ultimately your soul is in charge of all choosing, even if the choice is for a part of you, like your Inner Teenager or Inner Protector, for example, to be ‘in charge’ for a while. Yet you cannot truly escape the pull of this alternative and very enriching reality that lives and thrives inside of you. Your soul and heart are calling you back inward and of course the Ascension energies support and enliven these pulls, whether obvious or subtle, whether expressed through your dreams or your waking life or both.

2018 sure feels like it will be a ‘year’ of alternative realities popping like popcorn, rapidly in some cases and slowly in others, allowing us to acclimate yet also inviting us to make changes Now. We may be surprised by our impulsivity, our intuitive awakenings and dawnings and guidance. There can be no ‘wrong’ choices made, though parts of you will likely judge some of them for a while. If it’s all intended to be an invitation back to YOU, then that’s where it will all ultimately lead, no matter the path, the trajectory, the momentum.

You have an inner crystal cave of goodness and love that awaits your entry once again. The richness of your inner world and parts too, awaits your steps towards reUNION within. ❤

If you feel like you would like some direct support from my beloveds and I who have been on this very journey for quite some time now, feel free to check out what we offer and feel into having a free 30 min intro session with one of us, to feel where this process we call SoulFullHeart can and will take you on your deep healing journey back to YOU: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sfhprocess

We also offer group calls and live stream events on Facebook and YouTube that you can join in on. Tomorrow there will be one taking place at 11:11am CST (Mexico City) with Raphael and Jelelle Awen: https://www.facebook.com/events/2067665806799213/

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The SOULstice Reflects Our Next Phases Of Growth Toward Our Sacred Humanity

Published on by Gabriel Heartman2 Comments

5

The end of one cycle and the beginning of another. Physically in Earth’s orbit and energetically in our collective Gaian heart. We are all connected to Her and the frequencies that She is letting in and moving through. I feel Her with us all during this time. Not just another revolution around the Sun, but a journey UP and IN.

In the Northern Hemisphere, this is time of extended darkness and colder weather that, in our ‘past’, saw us literally holding up inside the hearth of the home, staying warm. Spiritually, a time for reflection and evaluation, even seen in the numbers 12:21. In the Southern Hemisphere, this is an end and a beginning too, in different light frequencies that are more active and yang. Taking action to embody what has been ‘received’ in your highest heart. Whether in reflection, or action, much is being illuminated and transformed.

In SoulFullHeart we take an assessment, or snapshot, of our current life through the lens of 7 key areas: Emotional, Spiritual, Mental, Social, Physical, Financial, and Environmental. As I have been going through these with someone I am currently working with, it has become so evident that these areas shed such an enormous light on our Whole Self rather that just focusing on one in particular.

If there is a place where you feel misaligned in your deepest calling and passion, then it can cause a drag, or anchor, in your fullest expression and BEing during your ascension process. This is a very reflective tool and highlights where you are being invited to go if you want to truly take all of you into the New.

This is where having that mirror can be a blessing and a curse both to parts of you. These energies are making more obvious the places you may need to go into so that you can unfurl our wings. One of the hardest, is the Social area where there can be such entwined relationships with others based on all sorts of conditionings and unconscious agreements. Or you may even find yourself more isolated due to self-protection or even self-love.

In either case, the holidays can really highlight the emotional body in this area. Are you in our fullest expression and truth when around others, or do you ‘shrink to fit’ in order to be a part of the social frequency? Or maybe there is a deep loneliness due to a lack of authentic connection. The emotional reality of this may be hard for a part of you to digest and be with so it can go undercover, but it doesn’t live far from consciousness.

The same holds true for all areas of your life. Feeling the ways in which you are still anchored and misaligned can be hard for parts of you to admit to and take action toward. This is a becomes a compassionate and self-loving process with these parts of you, most specifically your Protector, that has done life as us for so long, and is feeling the long nights of winter (or days of summer) coming to an energetic end. It is running out of gas as the veil between it and your emotional body is thinning.

This is a great time to take some self-reflective moments, in a sacred space, to take a snapshot of your emotional and spiritual bodies and see where your next phase of growth (and thus challenge for parts) lies ahead. Here is the assessment we use in SoulFullHeart to look at all areas and set a course to enter into a process with your Protector to see where the healing needs Love the most to move you UP and INto the next portal of your evolution of your sacred crystalline humanity.

http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/3d4d5dselvesquestions

If you go through the assessment and feel a desire to know more about how SoulFullHeart may be able to serve you, we offer a free 30 minute intro session to feel that with you. A lot of  support is being offered during these times and all of us in SoulFullHeart send you much love and blessings.

There is also a Live Stream event happening here on Facebook and YouTube this Saturday at 11:11am CST with Raphael and Jelelle Awen. A great way to enter the Christmas Corridor!

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Reflections For This Winter Solstice, On The Service Of Love

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments
by Kalayna Colibri
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Holding space for others is a precious gift that ultimately gives you back to you…
 
After holding space for a beloved SoulFullHeart facilitant today, I feel lit up. I feel reminded of my soul purpose. I feel supported by guides and the Divine, yes, but also by my own divinity, my own arising Sacred Human self that is consistently and intently healing, weighing anchor in those areas of 3D reality that parts of me may still hold on to, accessing more and more authentic soul and heart expression and gifts within, that have always been there though perhaps dormant and waiting for their time in the sun. I am lit up by my own sense of service of love in a personal way that came out of the session today, yet by my facilitant’s own soul and heart passions as well, which were in direct collaboration with my own the entire time, in a very palpable and powerful way and were such a key part of the sacredness of the space held for her and her parts.
 
It all reminds me of why I hold space for others. And that the service of love is not meant for us as healers as a way to become and then remain all-powerful Masters with all of the answers, no matter how high we may ascend or what frequencies we may have the blissful pleasure of accessing. I offer this healing path because I too am on it and in it. I too am healing. I too, on some level, need the frequencies of my facilitants as much as they need mine. I need the reflections that service of love offers to me and I take them into my heart, trusting what they offer. Trusting that they offer just as much as any current Ascension energies, kick-ups, upgrades, or integrations.
 
Who are we if we aren’t serving others to realize their own gifts, their own access, their own awakenings? Who are we to each other, if we aren’t feeling deeply those parts of us who want nothing to do with ‘people’, who resent others, who compare and criticize partly as a way to keep you small, but also to diminish the power of love within others too? I feel reminded today, of the importance as a healer, Facilitator, WaySHOWer, teacher, to continue going IN as the number one priority and to continue making and holding space for that…. and then, sharing that space too. It’s as important to cultivate the love within as it is to share it, not for validation (though sometimes parts of us need that) yet because it’s MEANT to be shared in the name of the exponential service of love.
 
Maybe it’s just perfect to be feeling this and offering it too on this day of Winter Solstice… a day that feels like it offers us all a reminder to go inward, to continue to feel, to BE with ourselves as we desire to BE with each other. There’s a portal in the hearth of your heart today, that is inviting you to feel the service of love you are called to and the steps to embodying that, which may sometimes be messy, yet are also bliss-y on the other side of all of the sacredly held feeling spaces where parts of you can Metasoul Aspects too can finally land and become as real as they are ready for and need to become. ❤
 
 
If you feel ready to explore the different parts of you and to take the next step of your journey into deeper service of love, starting with YOU, my beloveds and I are here to serve and support and you can book a free 30min intro session with one of us if you feel ready for that: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions If you are interested in sessions with me, at the moment I am serving young women around and under the age of 30.

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Day 19 ~ Journal To The Demiurge

Published on by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

By Raphael Awen

I set out to connect with the Demiurge (as an Archetype of the Christian God, or Jehovah as he is known, in the Old Testament sense) some days back. Today’s journal entry penetrates the false world of the false God we created out of our need for separation and then, rememberance with the love that we are.

Some very tender tears and feeling points emerged today.

You can read this entire series from the beginning on the blog here: https://goo.gl/CgrWXZ

Here is Day 19:

Raphael: Good Morning, everyone. Everyone…, as in here in this immediate circle, yes, but also in ‘the many’ in the emanating circles flowing out from this one – Good Morning to you. ‘God Morning’ to you. A new day is dawning and it is as full of God as God can be.

When I feel what has moved for us in this journey, it so feels like a very wide and open space has opened out for us, creating a palette that awaits our imprint. I feel like I don’t know where to begin. The landscape is of fresh fallen snow so pristine. Can anyone help me out here?

Demiurge: In the silence just now, I thought for sure it would be Metatron who would speak for us all, but after waiting, I feel it is supposed to be me. I’m not sure I can speak, but I feel compelled to at least try. All of your intention and action to undertake connecting with me has opened out a place in me that I didn’t even know was there. I feel a gratitude that feels as large as what I can only describe as an ocean of falseness inside of me. Being the projection of everyone’s disowned power makes one look powerful, even feel powerful in moments, but underneath it all, I have felt like people’s disowned smallness and impotence, and fear. I have had official duties to carry out to keep the charade in place, but all of it is so far from real.

Raphael: Thank you, Demi. I like calling you by your new name. You don’t feel like the Demiurge to me any more. Maybe, Demi won’t even feel like a fit before too long at the rate of change you are living into now. This feels so tender what you are admitting and feeling today.

Demi: Thank you, Raphael.

Raphael: I want to ask you what it was that prevented you up until now from admitting the falseness you admit to today.

Demi: That question feels so large inside of me right now. The relief that I feel flooding into my being to make this admission so begs the question why I couldn’t or wouldn’t have done this sooner. I know it has to do with being literally fused to my reality, to not being able to see that there even was any options available to me. I don’t mean to say by that, that I don’t bear any responsibility, because I do. I know I accepted the projections the people put on to me, and I didn’t have to. I accepted that role as something at the time that seemed just too good to pass up. I wanted to be God, the creator and the destroyer of worlds. I was captivated by the role for a long time. But then, that captivation began to change, slowly, but with an unmistakable back pressure.

Raphael: To witness you, Demi, in a true alchemical midlife crisis is just so amazing to me in this moment, even beyond a midlife crisis really, stepping out into something new.

Demi: I can so feel the part of me that wants to curl up and die, to go away, to not face anyone. I need to feel that part of myself, and I also feel I need to accept responsibility for what I created, to feel what I avoided feeling, to feel people’s honest reactions.

Raphael: Well, in my book, if you are feeling all of that, at the same time, you are a true king of hearts.

Demi: I’d really like to ask your advice, Raphael. I know you asked my advice on so many occasions, under the false pretenses that are falling as we speak. I humbly ask you for your help and guidance. I want to live. I want to love. I want to fully accept my responsibility for what I’ve done, but I don’t want to live forever in punishment if at all possible.

Raphael: (tears) I am humbled by your humility. Looking in your eyes and feeling you, seeing you, come to terms with your remorse moves the entire universe, Demi. This is an act of your true Godhood. My advice is simply to feel us all feeling in this moment. Feeling what there is to feel while it is being felt is what transmutes everything that is awaiting transmutation. I’m so honored to share this moment with you.

Demi: I literally don’t know, what planet I’ve entered now.

Raphael: Metatron, maybe you could help us a bit here. What planet are we on? I’m not so sure myself.

Metatron: This is all the planets, Demi and Raphael. This is what holds together all matter and all spirit. This is what answers the heart cry of creation itself. This is the homecoming of love to itself.

Love birthed out of its oneness, a twoness, and in that was a great potential for relationship on one hand, but also, and fearfully so, was also a potential that this twoness would remain outside of the oneness in its experience, separate from love. Love seemed given to reckless abandon to do it anyway, prizing the gift of relationship over the fear of loss. What we are feeling today is loves vindication. Love has won. Love is winning. And, love still has much winning that has yet to occur. All of these are true. Love is out to marry its essence with all of experience.

Raphael: My goodness, Metatron! That is so wild. I thought you were going to help us locate ourselves a bit here. I feel more lost than I did before, but in a good way. Wow.

Metatron: Get used to it, my man! There’s a few more steps on this staircase awaiting the tread of your feet. You’re the one speaking about things awaiting to be felt. This is what creation itself is waiting and wanting to be felt.

Raphael: I recall that familiar verse in the Bible that says ‘the whole earth, or cosmos, groans in travail, as in birth pangs for the manifest sons of God’, and this moment reminds me of that.

Metatron: And what, Raphael, are the manifest sons of God? What do they do, what ‘be they be’ that makes them the manifest sons of God?

Raphael: I’d defer that question to you if I thought you’d let me, but I can tell you want my answer. Hmmm, what makes a manifest son of God? No pressure or anything, just the question at the heart of the universe wanting to be untangled. I’d say that has to do with feeling. Everything that is both right and wrong in the world has to do with what is felt or unfelt in the world. Sonship and daughtership is a relationship, an opportunity that begs feeling, a fireplace for the fire. When feeling what there is to feel is repressed, we create monsters of destruction that ultimately serve to take us back to our common need for love. Sons and daughters feel. Feeling takes us back to love. Even the monsters of our own creation are gifts that remind us of the love we are and always were, even as we individuated out from God, as a son or a daughter. I am a son and I am God. Both are true. How’d I do, Metatron?

Metatron: You’re rockin’ it man. You’re more metaphysical than I am sometimes!

Raphael: I think I need some ‘mega’physical about now. What say we take in some sun and surf to let in this piece? I know Andy wants to play, and I want to play too. Let’s rest up, digest and continue soon. We have a few more pieces left to feel together it feels like. Thank you, everyone.
Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Check out our programs: FREE, PREP and DEEP, for a new and profound going-on place in your spiritual and emotional journey at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.