Letting Go Of Community To Find It Anew Inside And Out

Hello, everyone. It has been some time since I have written a post due to a lot of inner processing since the New Year. I have been met with an awareness of myself that has been subconscious, and even unconscious to some degree, in my relationship to being in deep intimate community. I have been writing about this a lot as it has been my main focus since 11/11.

I have projected a lot of my own wounding onto those that are closest to me that have created an unfortunate dynamic that has been underground inside me for some time. I have recognized my own tendencies to repress some things that have needed air and they have just built up over time. In unpacking these suppressed realities and parts of me, I have found that I am in deep need of catching up to who I authentically am as a healer, leader, and in service to the Divine.

This has felt like a last gasp of my ego coming to the surface in many ways and I have recognized that they best way for me to truly reset this dynamic is to remove myself from the SoulFullHeart community as a member and a facilitator. It is how I can have these parts of me fully land in me fully and to see and feel community in a brand new light. Sometimes we need to step outside of something in order to let it in in a deeper and expanded way.

I have had a lot of amazing memories with everyone in SFH, and that makes it all the harder to let go. Yet this feel like a necessary journey for me as a man and as a leader. I need to find my soul and heart voice and hold that with integrity in relationship to others, especially as intimate as we have all been the past seven years.

I know this comes on the heels of my last post about soul family, which I still hold as true, but it was a bit premature for me to post it as we were all still in processing together about these intimacy dynamics. I have removed it since for that reason. I still hold everyone as soul family. It is for this reason that I am doing this. Out of respect for them, my parts, and my growth.

I will be looking to move to the Seattle area soon and start to go deeper into my BEing and my human heart. I have a lot to reflect on and a lot to share along the way as that feels appropriate to share. I feel so blessed to have been a part of this community with Jelelle, Raphael, Raianna, and Kalayna. They are my heroes and my guides. It is a very sobering and humble time for me and that brings with it a lot more reverence and gratitude. I am aiming to cultivate more of that in months to come.

Thank you all for your years of support and reflection to me as man coming into his power and his heart. It has been a huge gift to me that I will be taking with me. I feel many of you as part of that ‘family’ feeling. I have a lot of trust this will lead me to a brand new experience of myself and of the world around me. I look forward to digesting it all along the way however it is meant to serve.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

The Gifts And Challenges Of Soul Family

Soul family is the ultimate manifestation of our healing.

While we can feel an ache for it, there may also be parts that fear it just as much. Soul family is Love actuated and aligned. It is a fire walk and a beautifully intense journey.

As the conditioned and old ties that have bound us begin to show signs of weariness and completion, new resonance is sought and desired. There may even be a need for a solo phase to heal and realign within. There comes a time when the draw to Soul Family just becomes part of our chosen path.

I have been in this family of heart and soul for 7 years and it has been a long journey for me and my parts. I have found myself staring at the most difficult part of my growth and that is my relationship to intimacy, to transparency and to vulnerability.

This is no small feat for someone who wasn’t totally conscious of what any of that was seven ago. I just knew I needed support and guidance. Oh, and a mirror got thrown in for good measure.

I continue my healing of being in intimacy with others. It has had major challenges. Yet, my parts and I are becoming ever so much clearer that I have needed this and my soul wants me to keep moving through the tough parts.

So many projections become blatantly clear when you are in the swell of love and soul family. It is an unfortunate, yet important ground to keep working through so you can get the good stuff. The stuff you were drawn to Soul Family in the first place.

I am blessed to be a part of this with those that want to see me for who I am, not just what they think I should be, yet with their own self-loving boundaries. This is what keeps it sustainable and real. I am a better man and a better human being because of it.

So I send a deep gratitude to those that have been the biggest part of my life to date and in the future for as long as it is meant to be. Thank you and I love you, Jelelle, Raphael, and Raianna.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

The Tides Are Turning

The tides are turning.
What has always laid underneath
Is coming to the surface.
Coming into full view

We are each going to be presented
With a choice
A choice to feel
To take responsibility
To take action
To surrender
To forgive

We will be given access to
All that has haunted us
All that we have hidden
Or just couldn’t bear to see
As well as all that we have been
Prepared to become
To embody
To let in as our highest calling

The Light is breaching the horizon
Casting shadows
And providing illumination
How you respond to that is a choice
An epic decision for a part of you to die
In order to fly

This is the sticky, prickly
Lower 4D ground we have been walking upon
Because it is all that parts of our soul
Have ever felt they have known

But we are being shown something different
Something more alive
It is our courage to go into this ground
And bring the Light of our bigness and depth
To help set us free once and for all

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

The Long Goodbye

It feels like yesterday
But it was long ago
The arising reality
That it wasn’t meant to be
To be together
To be forever
Was coming into view

We tried all that we could
To patch it together
With all the strings of love
We knew how to gather
To keep it sailing
To keep the music playing

It has been a long goodbye
A road of letting go
Of all the things we collected
And held tight to along the way

Has it been the joy or the suffering
That I have clung so dear?
Sometimes I don’t know if I can tell
With a soul so used to despair
And a shadow of doubt to its repair

I have but two ways to go
The one that feels less traveled
Less likely
More forgotten
Is the one that seeks my return
Summons my courage
Calls my name

It is the journey home to my Heart
Collecting and guiding all of the lives
That have ever been alone, forgotten,
Afraid and downtrodden

It is the road paved with choice,
With trust, with desire,
And with honesty
That will lead me back to the Love
That has never left

So as I sit on the shore
Of this next unknown chapter,
I see how instead of this being
A long goodbye
It is rather an unfolding Hello.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

The Noel As An Awakening And A Birth

Feeling this Christmas, a connection to the heart of what its spirit wants to offer us. Feeling and healing the contention of HIStory, it can be a portal into a realm within us that is a birthing of our own Christ Heart, our own magic into a world that has squirreled it away for safe remembrance.

Noel is the name given to this birthing day. It is also the name of my gatekeeper and feels so poignant to me now. He offers it is more of an awakening, but a birthing the same. It is a reflection of what lies in the Dark Night of our shadow that comes into full view of the Star of our Highest Self. The story of the Noel is one that lives within in each of us with different names and circumstances.

This the true gift of the season. Going INN to feel your wise kings and queens offering you treasures of your metasoul lives that bestow great purpose onto you. Feeling all that has kept us in the poverty of our forgetting. Our true connection to the stars above and below. This is the end of what once was into what is aching to Be.

I feel myself embarking in deeper waters this day and each to follow. Feeling my own God baby within, as well as the inner cast of my own guides and wounded parts, in intimate connection with those that are doing the same. A nativity scene in the hearth of my heart.

On this day I send much love and many blessings to you and your parts birthing into the world. A reminder that You are the most important receiver of love from you to you, that can then healthfully and authentically share to others in overflow. The invitation for deeper connection inside and out is always under the SoulFullHeart Christmas tree.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

The Solstice A Marker Of Personal And Collective Revelation

On this winter solstice day, I feel a lot on the horizon for humanity. These past 7 years feel like they have been a prelude to some grand finale. The final act of the current Earthen drama. I watched the last episode of The Morning Show last night and I got this feeling that it was tapping into something very prophetic. For those that are watching it, or will watch it, I won’t be a spoiler. Needless to say, the lie that we have all been a part of, in one form or another, is beginning to unveil itself even as it seems to be ‘business as usual’.

The shadow is in revelation. It is surfacing and with that so is the Light we need to respond to it. We will not be going back to the ‘way it was’ for the words needed to prop it up no longer hold much value anymore. How long this takes is an unknown, but as each one of us continues to go into our own shadowlands and heal our hidden traumas and love our warts, the energy released and anchored into higher frequencies can aid in this process.

You get to be the whistleblower on your own co-creation in this constructed reality. This is not to punish or to feel shame, but quite the opposite. It is to love and forgive. It is to let go and let in. It is to choose to participate in another reality that is centered in your realness, your authenticy, and your passion. There are steps that will need to be taken that will not be exactly how a part of you may want them to be, but they are steps. Necessary and sacred.

The year 2020 is about clarity. Seeing clearly what is right in front of you that has just been veiled by fear, pain, and the old conditioning of what Love really is. False Love and False Gods are on their way out. This will have a reaction that causes quakes and tremors. How we each hold and care for ourselves in the process is the Ark of our new covenant with the Divine.

Mine is about being a real with myself and others as I can each day. Letting my inner world present itself more to others and not remain hidden out of fear. It is about claiming the job I was sent here to do so that others may do the same. It is like a giant game of leapfrog. I serve you and you serve me until we find ourselves co-creating a new story and graciously ending the old one.

On this day, I honor this journey for each of you and myself. I see this as our New Year’s Day. The start of a new cycle where heaven and earth become One and we enter a new renaissance of our humanity. Not through our technology but through our sacred humanity.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Sometimes It Just Takes Time

Time
Sometimes it just takes time.
Time to let go
Time to let in
Time to feel the parts that are
Cycling in time.

It can feel as if time is like
Waves lapping up on shore
One repetition after another
Yet the ground is shifting
The earth is moving
Life is churning underneath

If time is just another expression of Love
Then we have an infinite supply
If we can’t run out of Love
Then we can’t run out of time

So while I can say “it just takes time”
I can also say “it just takes Love”.
It takes Love to let go
It takes Love to let in
It takes Love to feel your parts

To feel your anxiety
Your doubts
Your hopes
And your dreams

Be kind to yourself and your selves
Be willing to listen
To hold space
For their needs and truth

Be willing to breathe
And be willing to choose
It is all a dance and a journey
There’s no road to run out of
No time to lose
Just Love to feel
And a heart and soul to heal

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

A Man’s Greatest Gift…His Heart

A man’s heart is his greatest gift
And his greatest fear
He can stand in the fires of hell
With his courage and conviction
Or seek cover and asylum in his shadow

A man’s heart can be a paradox and a parable
Of the journey back to himself through the womb
There is a Killer and a Lover
A Fighter and an Ambassador
A Scientist and Poet

It is a journey that is lined with mirrors
He may choose not to look at
If he wants to maintain all that he has constructed,
Assumed and convinced of.

But if he chooses to look
To feel all that he has been afraid to see
He actually stares into his own death
His loss of control
That can only be replaced by surrender

Surrender to the burning of feeling
Of bringing himself back to life
Through this death
The death of loneliness
Of suffering
Of protecting
Of hiding

This man now stands naked
An emperor without clothes
To be seen as he is
In his humble vulnerability

This is where he rises anew
In Heart
As Soul
Surrounded…by Love
By Divinity
By Intimacy

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

The Kaleidoscopic Realness Of Feeling

Sometimes it gets cold inside
Ice forms over the places that haven’t been easy to feel
To remember.

It is not the totality of the Heart
But a protected region.
The Sun hasn’t quite made its way
But it’s always patiently persistent.

The cold and isolated parts of us
Just need that reminder that it was all necessary.
All part of the plan and journey.

It was all Love.
Believe it or not.

So I sit with the coldness
The fear
The unworth

I offer an ember
That may one day grow
And melt away all that it has covered.
Releasing the essence of being

The kaleidoscopic realness of feeling
Of transparency
Of authenticity
Of warmth
Of joy
Of Grace

But today we just sit
And feel the moment
What Is
With Love

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

The Giving Season In The Real Age

The holiday season is here in full force. We have many religious traditions, the winter solstice, and the turn of a new year and decade approaching. There is much anticipation of what is to come on so many levels. So many predictions and possibilities. We are awash with potential and demand at the same time.

In all of this it is easy to lose track of our selves. The parts of us that can get buried in it all. This can be a very magical time if we can take the time to slow it all down. What is that you really want if you were to be totally honest with yourself?

Now that may seem counter to the Giving Season. You ‘should’ be focused on others. Your loved ones and those that are less fortunate. It is not the others that I take issue with, it is the ‘shoulding’. That shoulding, if it exists, does not dispense or seed genuine Love at its core.

When you feel a genuine and authentic love for yourself, and all the parts of you that have been in shadow and hiding, then you bring something real to the Giving. You bring something that is not laced with guilt, duty, or obligation. It is free and flowing.

My purpose here is to bring an awareness to our giving as well as our intending, not to diminish it. What I want for all of us this coming year is a personal journey of self-love that can authentically overflow to those we come in contact with formally or informally. It is the internal combustion engine of our heart-centered alchemy.

There is a lot of hope that next year will ‘be the year’. We can hold that intention while we continue to do the work today. Right now. In this moment. That daily promise to yourself and all of your parts is what seeds that global transformation. Send love globally while you give love locally.

May this holiday season be a catalyst for your own personal evolution and arising. May the lovelight of consciousness find all of the places where we all need it the most in our shadow. Only then can the bells ring for the dawn of the Real Age.

Love to you this season.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.