Entering ‘2019’: Love Within To Experience Love With Others

by Kalayna Colibri

For many, 2018 was a ‘year’ of mining. Many discoveries and memories have surfaced, especially those kept in the shadow and buried deep. Life and incoming energy waves have helped it all press up to the surface to actually be felt, help you learn ways to be with it, to honour and love it UP. This process continues, because to put it simply, it’s time to love your pain as much as you love your genuine joy and growing sense of wholeness.

Loving the pain and aches that surface as reactions, anxiety, sadness, etc means moving through it not just getting above it as parts of you are used to having to do in order to keep the peace in current relationships or to keep life on an even keel. It’s becoming harder to do this as your inner realities continue to be shaken up and brought to your attention. All gateways and portals this year have had different pieces to illuminate inside of you, showing you where you’re really at so you can grow and move from there, love yourself there, and eventually learn how to flow with ALL of you, including whatever has been held by the shadow, from there, that starting point.

There are so many parts of you that have wanted your attention but haven’t had a way to directly ask for it until the life circumstances are ripe and your heart is ready to feel them. This means sometimes that the pain you thought you had already healed has revealed a new layer and pain you thought was long-buried is now ready to surface. This can be messy but a sacred process nonetheless and you can trust that it’s surfacing because you’re now ready to hold it and actually move through and heal it, as challenging as this can be… the tears and wails are worth it, and the realness and poignancy it brings to each moment of your life is what brings in more love and more sense of being held and loved by a universe that benevolently wants you to heal, grow, and ascend.

In addition to parts surfacing in different ways, there have been many Metasoul/other timeline/lifetime bleed-throughs that have overlaid your consciousness and brought out other shadow pieces from your soul to be felt too. This has also brought in higher vibe energies too to help guide and template for you what your 5D/Higher Self energizes in your life and soul purpose. This year has been cataclysmic for some and also given many openings. Pain is an opening as much as discovering your truest sense of joy and bliss is.

In 2019, I feel we will all continue to be challenged to deepen our experience of ourselves, to love ourselves much deeper on a soul and heart level. It’s all there to move us to new places and integrate into our 5D/Higher Self. This is how we learn to love each other deeper with mutual reverence and respect, by experiencing this between parts of you first. This is what gives us the chance to overcome and heal the harm that has been done by insisting on fighting, over-lording, overpowering, even with ‘love and light’ as a ‘weapon’. 2019 asks us to keep going inward and find the parts that cannot or will not love or serve love, that have resistance to offering love, likely because they themselves need more love from you and to feel you moving into your highest timeline step by step before they can trust and lean into you. Love is the way. Love is the path. And the path has to start within in order to bring our beloved vision of New Earth into the Now.

At midnight tonight the ‘new year’ officially ‘begins’. The gateway into this new energy we’re calling ‘2019’ and the energies of the gifts and growth it wants to bring each of us is available to let in now as we set our sail and follow our hearts into the new Now that is so beyond just being a dream and wants to become more and more of our everyday reality!

Much love and Happy New Year! ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

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Being With Holiday Anxiety

By Kalayna Colibri

I feel the swirl and frenzy of the holiday season in moments and wonder what it would be like to go to a shopping mall right now and feel everyone more heart-centered, more honest even about who they are buying a Christmas gift for and why. It’s a dizzy dance right now for many souls as parts of each person finds their way into and through anxiety and pain that’s pushed up this time of year and intensified in moments by the pure energies of love coming in that actually want to help you see and heal all of it and be with the reasons why this pain has been there.

Maybe just for a moment today… if you do feel anxiety bubbling up about one thing or another (or even many things at once), find space, even minutes, to be with this energy and listen to it. Journal with it. Hear it, feel it, hold it. This part of you has been quelled and suppressed for a long time and needs you, needs somewhere to land. I feel for this and all parts of you being activated in their pain now. The Divine love streaming in feels you and these parts too. The invitation now and always is to simply be real. Even just with yourself. And feel.

It’s my sense of it that the unconscious buying, giving, and getting and even eating of this season is what leads into more of the same pain cycling through again and again, the same quandaries about love being real or not, the same feeling that this is just ‘normal’ and ‘how it is’ to be in life and in relationship with others without an awakening that this isn’t what’s ultimately true… just what has felt deeply true to the parts of you with this conditioning. You have the opportunity now and always to reach for new ways to be in life and in love, starting with that ever-precious and unfolding relationship within. You are the ‘Christ-child’ being born and reborn within. With so much power, so much lush love, so many new possibilities for being born and reborn into this world that needs your light and bigness.

Much love!

~

It’s in my heart and my beloveds’ hearts to model this new way of being with yourself and to support you in discovering it within too in a long-lasting, empowering and loving way… affordable, 1:1 sessions available now: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Being With Post-Holiday Emotional Indigestion

By Kalayna Colibri

I get the sense today that there’s a lot of lingering ‘indigestion’ going on coming off of Thanksgiving weekend in the USA, both in the physical and the emotional…. being with friends and family members who are no longer resonant with who you are and are becoming often creates a strain inside as parts of you shape-shift and adjust to the energies at the dinner table, suppressing how they are really feeling and reacting. Something that is becoming harder and harder to do as truth-telling parts of you like your Inner Protector, who has been observing and managing your relationship with your family and old friends, are becoming less and less tolerant of what isn’t resonant or feels like real love to them.

This suppression leads to intense indigestion in your emotional body, leaving you with physical and emotional pain too. If your body is reacting to the amount of food you’ve taken in, it’s likely also reacting to the energy of its preparation and consumption too. Checking in with your Inner Protector is a great way to feel them in their ongoing rumbles and to connect with the other parts of you they have been protecting as best they can from the sometimes quite invasive energy of those around you on these holidays that can be especially intense and charged with all sorts of unfelt and uncared for emotional realities and reactivity.

There are several guided mediations on our YouTube channel, SoulFullHeart Experience, for you to explore a connection with your Inner Protector.

The invitation is always to feel what you want in your heart and what you need for your soul. The real soul food of resonant relationships and soul family community is a potent energy to lean into for growth and deep nourishment. The reflections offered to you by non-resonant relationships are eventually no longer needed as the care offered from those who are doing the same degree of inner work as you is no comparison and is all you and your parts eventually will want to experience. It’s a sacred journey to arrive here to this place where the comfortably uncomfortable feeling of being around family members and friends who do not nurture your journey nor let you in enough to have you nurture theirs, is no longer desired. And, it’s just as sacred to feel all there is to feel, including the fears and anxieties in parts of you as you begin to let in true soul family connections and embark on the journey of continued growth and expansion in all of your intimate relationships.

Much love as you navigate all of these themes and tones in a way that is most meant for you at this time… ❤️

~

There’s so much deep support my beloveds and I offer through affordable, 1:1 sessions if you feel drawn to ask for help in the digestion of what has been indigestible: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Photo by Cristian Newman via unsplash.com

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

What Does It Mean to Love ‘Authentically’?

by Kalayna Colibri

The conditioning is deep around what we’ve been taught real love and care is and looks like. It’s challenging to feel it in different ways, to take a deep look at how we’ve related to love and how we’ve been convinced we’re supposed to embody it.

So often what we think of as loving or caring can have more of a negative impact on others than a positive one. False apologies, empty promises, tugging and grabbing at others… these frequencies can be obvious or subtle. And in any case, we aren’t genuinely caring about our impact on others, only what parts of us want and are afraid they won’t get or look like on the outside. I so know this one from my own process too, and learning to see and feel even the subtle ways in which this happens is illuminating and invites you to shift these patterns for good.

I think so often we (or parts of us) are actually terrified to deeply feel what it would be like to be someone else and genuinely feel our impact on them, whether or not we feel we’ve been ‘loving’ toward them.

This is tricky… and hard to feel too. It can be hard to look inward and challenge how we have been holding love and what it means to love another, whether in official ‘service of love’ or in everyday relationships. It’s amazing what it illuminates within though… which is so often an untouched inner reality of how we ourselves, and parts of us, have felt incredibly unworthy of real love, abandoned somehow, and in a void space that has never been filled by genuine self-love and the journey of unfolding that within.

So what does it look and feel like to actually care and love another person?

To me, it feels like giving space for another’s growth without tugging on them to join in on yours. It feels like inviting someone to share with you what they need and want, but not with a commitment from you to make it happen for them. It feels like the overflow of good inner-parenting, of relating to yourself and getting to know your own quirks and shadowy aspects and energies within you as well as your gifts and growth and flowing this energy to another to support their own inner-parenting to grow and blossom too. It feels like being willing to let go even when your heart really doesn’t want to.

It’s a lot to feel into these pieces and truth be told, I’m not sure any of us can truly master this skill of loving another in the purest way… we and parts of us all have understandable investments in relationships of all kinds and hopes that they will last too. We all have desires and dreams and don’t really ever want to feel lonely (though really landing in the loneliness has so many gifts too)… we all have what we want to experience from others and in our lives in general. Yet love asks us to trust… to invest in the process yet divest of the outcome. To feel what we want most and understand that it won’t always come to us in ways we can control.

Above all, love wants us to remember that it is never against us or anybody else, though it can feel that way at times. It only ever wants us to experience more of it within so that we can share it with others. This flow of love is really all the ‘service of love’ is anyways, though it can be dressed up in many ways and be given many labels and is not always easy to truly embody for ourselves, let alone others.

Much love to you as you continue to experience your own journey into more and more REAL love, and the path of learning to embody love in the most authentic way possible. ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart co-founder, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Incoming Energies Support Coming Out Of Hiding In ALL Ways & Relationships

By Kalayna Colibri

It continues to get harder and harder to compartmentalize, to hide, to avoid feeling all there is to feel. The parts of you that have worked so hard to keep certain things hidden, maybe especially your spirituality and consciousness, your real desires for your life, heart and soul too… these parts are finding that they’re getting tired and it’s just plain getting harder to stay closeted and under wraps. To avoid the necessary messes is becoming nearly impossible anymore as your soul makes choices for your growth and its deeper healing and openings that it can’t be steered away from any longer.

You may find yourself in conflicts that parts of you are feeling stumped by, wondering how they could have gotten here when they’ve worked so hard to keep your truth and perhaps the truths of others too in a sort of holding pattern.

This, it feels like, is the root of bigger Disclosure events and what Ascension constantly invites us into. Disclosure within and in all relationships you have is a process and one that has been ongoing for a while now too. It feels like this is ramping up more now too, where parts are even becoming a bit lax about hiding anything, feeling exhausted by how hard they’ve worked to maintain these veils for so long…

There’s so much that surfaces now, especially perhaps the harder more intense and dark feelings, not to be tortured by (though parts of you may feel it this way) but to be brought into your heart and held, finally, so the real vulnerability of the real fears and places of inner suffering can be transmuted with love.

It’s a process of one part or Metasoul Aspect at a time… to feel every nuance, every piece that is emerging and not just ‘release’ it, but to have a relationship with it that is built and held by love and can therefore be transmuted into more love within you.

It’s a process I have loved and fallen in love with over and over again… and it invites you to fall in love with you, with everything you’ve thought was only dark or dreary too, to claim every gift of who you are in this moment now, and every gift of who you are that you aren’t even aware of yet…

If what has been hidden remains hidden, the treasure deep within the dark caves and caverns would never be discovered… and the process of your healing and Ascension will have trouble finding it’s places of deepening, its ways to move beyond all suffering no matter how buried, and its way into a true experience of 5D and beyond.

~

To support you on your journey and to help you feel the parts of you that are hurting over the circumstances they may be moving through with you, you can check out our Bridging Sessions offering which is very affordable and powerful too: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/bridging-session I have slots available next week for young women under 35 and would love to serve you!

Much love to you! ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 35, emoto-spiritual teacher, WayShower, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Be Transparent Within, Share Your Authentic Heart With The World

by Kalayna Colibri

I’m really getting into this transparent sharing piece, especially because being a “young” woman leading something new in spiritual and emotional healing has meant that parts of me have been afraid on some level to be transparent, in case it’s seen as “too weak” or “not healed enough” in order to draw those I want to serve. This applies across the board to healers of all ages though. Until you’ve done the work to feel and heal the insecurities from the inside out, they remain there inside parts of you and play out sometimes in propping yourself up or posturing.

I feel as if there is a strong invitation right now though, to “come as you are”, whether you are a self-identified/life-identified “healer” or if you are seeking help and healing yourself.

Come as you are… powerful Biblical words in one way, but also a sweet way to feel yourself, your parts, your Metasoul Aspects too.

To enter into your own inner world, stripped of defenses, takes practice. There is an Inner Protector energy that may not want the way your inner world has functioned to shift or change at all. It doesn’t want to give up the ghost on the way he/she has been holding and protecting your other parts. You can almost think of this part as your inner President/Prime Minister, lording over the inner landscapes and keeping everything in order or even disarray if that’s where your life circumstances tend to lean. To feel your Inner Protector is a powerful way to enter the gateway of your own heart and parts, as it is and as they are right now. What’s the state of your inner country, your inner king or queen-dom? You can close your eyes and powerfully feel/see this right now if you want to. It’s illuminating, no matter what.

The more you visit with this energy inside of you and show up to feel and hold it and your other parts, the more it will start to trust your growing authentic/5D Self. The Inner Protector wants to hand the reign of your inner King/Queen-dom over to you, but they need to trust that you will consistently show up first. 

Jelelle Awen has created a beautiful meditation you can try in order to meet this part of you if you’re curious to feel him/her: https://youtu.be/7ciJIvrn0xA

Inner transparency and disclosure is what leads to a healthy navigation of disclosing more of the preciousness of who you are to your outer world, that so NEEDS you, by the way… this ascending world and all of the beings within it need your heart and soul to be in its powerful nakedness. There is nothing more beautiful, especially when you’ve already done this and continually do this within you too. ❤

~

If you’d like support and illumination for what’s been brewing and moving inside of you and your life too, I offer 90min, 1:1 bridging sessions for young women around and under the age of 35 (for life experience reasons!). My beloveds offer bridging sessions as well: www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Much, much love to you on your inner journey! ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 35, emoto-spiritual teacher, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Lift The Inner Veil Through Self Permission To Feel, Be And See Beyond 3D

by Kalayna Colibri

imagination

When you close your eyes in this moment, what images come to you?

Each closing of the thin veil of our eyelids calls to something in our subconscious, gives it permission to come forward and be with us.

What is the first thing that you see? What is the first feeling that you feel?

There’s a keen self-permission required in wondering this way. In curiosity of the self. In being still for even a moment, to see what your subconscious wants to tell you. Maybe it wants to show you in symbols, feeling tones, colours, scenes, the parts of you that most need you now. Maybe it wants to give you hints of your soul, what its gifts and wounds are, both. Maybe it wants to give you glimpse, a hint, of the map of your life that only your soul can know about in any real detail.

Going within can be this quick, this simple, this easy. Of course, it doesn’t always feel this way. Parts of us that aren’t sure about it all, that are confused because 3D conditioning has told them that only what they can literally see and feel and hear without any need for interpretation or reading between the lines is worth taking in on any level. This can be existential too, as there could be lifetimes in your Metasoul of experiencing ridicule, persecution, excommunication, death, because of being willing to really see, really feel, really communicate even what might go against the norm.

So much has dulled our natural senses of a need to go inward, to be with ourselves, to get to know our hearts and our souls, to heal from the inside, out. So much has dulled our chance of experiencing something that takes us far beyond our typical daily experience. So much abuse, so much pain, so much necessary numbing-out and downplaying of our emotions, that really are an important aspect of our imagination, and our imagination is the most crucial aspect of our access to intuition, to soul gifts, to something well beyond the scope of 3D life.

Maybe today might be your first day of closing your eyes with the genuine intent of feeling what is beyond or could be beyond the veil of your 3D life… this precious and sacred veil that has been needed until now, or until any Now of your choosing. At any moment you can give yourself permission to close your eyes and BE, breathe, feel, see, experience, let in… let yourself and your parts in. Let in that you ARE here, NOW… that you ARE needed, wanted, loved… that you ARE who you ARE and that this ‘mess’ of how life has been has been necessary so you could get to this point of reading and taking in these words, of beginning or continuing your journey inward that somehow you trust will transform everything you experience outward.

Much love to you…

Kalayna ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

 

Filling Up And Serving From The Love-Well Within

by Kalayna Colibri

to love fully 2

To love fully, we must be self-filled, not self-less… this can a hard one to wrap our heads and hearts around, as parts of us tend to be very conditioned to the idea that in order love someone ‘the right way’, this often means sacrificing or over-compromising on many things, including but not limited to, our sense of spirituality, our emotional reality, our lifestyle, etc. It often means that parts of us have been OK with ‘shrinking to fit’ in order to maintain certain relationships, even if these relationships aren’t deeply resonant or nourishing, leaving us feeling drained, depressed, maybe even very ill.

Our 3D selves, often made up of many different parts of us, like our Inner Teenager, Inner Mother/Father (or Matriarch/Patriarch), Inner Punisher, and Inner Protector, seem to have a way of expressing ‘love’ that often compromises even their own deeply held beliefs and feelings. Love then becomes a game of disowning and dishonoring our authentic emotional reality for the sake of others as well as being very self-sacrificial and often martyrs, too. Over-giving becomes the norm and choosing YOU over anyone else becomes a ground for self-punishment and beratement instead of a feeling of needing to fill up the inner love-tank so that you only have MORE to give and receive, too. Chances are that if you are wired-up to live in this more outbound way, you often find yourself drained energetically, emotionally and even spiritually.

I hear many empaths staking the claim that everyone around them ‘drains’ them, painting a picture that their gift of being empathic is actually a burden, which it can certainly feel like to parts of us, especially while this dynamic of over-giving to others and under-giving to yourself is going on. The truth that I have felt and experienced, is that our need to go within is a strong one that shows itself in so many ways… and that the gift of being here to serve love means serving from an overflow of SELF love; a steady stream created within by the waters of self care and creating a sacred space for yourself, your parts, your Metasoul Aspects to land in.

Taking the space necessary in order to find this deep inner overflow is tricky while surrounded by others who do not value this space for themselves. The love we have and want to offer each other will always be there in some form, yet without space to feel and BE in our own hearts and healing processes, means that we are serving water from a dry or drying-out well that needs replenishment which must start from within. It is as important to be with ourselves as it is to be surrounded by others who offer nourishment on all levels of being and in all areas of our lives and that want to support us in taking care of us as well as being supportive towards them.

This felt like an important point to share today, especially as Gabriel Heartman and I have been digesting and sharing a lot about the social area of life in our vlog series, Practical Ascension. If you are curious to take in more about our experience of healing in this area of life and what we offer through the SoulFullHeart lens, you can find our videos on Youtube on the SoulFullHeart Experience channel and on this playlist: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLNmrHdaQSAvInP1AB__TzXykZythfad8i

Filling up within can be one of the hardest things to imagine doing for different parts of us, depending on the configuration of our lives, yet it is so important, especially during these times of intense awakenings and upgrades happening on all levels and the increasing depth of our own Ascension processes! Nothing draws the relationships with others that we truly desire, more than being willing to say ‘no’ when necessary, to say ‘yes’ when it feels nourishing and alive, and to find a relationship with ourselves that is truly loving, unconditional and infinite.  ❤

 

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Allowing Your Mourning To Open Your Heart

by Kalayna Colibri

crying-eye_4320

 

There are different life phases where a mourning process of some kind sets in. Parts of you can feel overwhelmed with grief… sometimes wanting to lash out, sometimes wanting to simply cocoon in until the storm passes, and maybe the two of these are combined in some moments too. Life can feel ‘cruel’ to parts, especially as it is often so hard to try and see the bigger picture holding the process you have found yourself immersed in, sometimes without much warning at all.

What I feel to invite now, is for all of us to feel it and be with it. Let it move into you, feeling it through, being in the tears. Parts of you need this ‘time’. They need to simply be held. The time for reframing for them and moving on from the suffering of it into more context and ultimately a deeper trust in love, life, self and the Divine too will emerge naturally, especially if the rawness is felt first. 3D reality has conditioned other parts of us to want to stymie the whole process of mourning and grief and they have deeply taken that in and held it as the only possibility. Even some spiritual practices encourage ‘letting go’ as the number one priority, yet ‘letting love’ is what comes first… letting love in to do its work, which comes into the heart, illuminates and presses on the bumps and bruises to allow the feeling to come in and flow out, which ultimately brings us the gift of deep healing and a naturally arising sense of joy and trust on the other side of it.

Ultimately, mourning of anything or anyone… any relationship, any life phase… is a process of alchemy. It is a process of creation and recreation in an extremely powerful way, as all movements within the heart truly are. It is an opportunity to allow in compassion as the mourning churns and moves and eventually fades, too. Compassion for the person or thing or perhaps beloved pet you are letting go of. Compassion for the life they led, the phases had with you, their needs for the next phase of life or death or anything in between that they now need to be with and live into. This is perhaps one of the most challenging things to feel for parts of us, yet it is the place where I feel we are ultimately guided to by pure love frequencies, as we feel everything that’s NOT compassion first, as well as the deep mourning and sense of loss in parts of us.

What truly moves us into our next phases and places is ‘e-motion’… our feelings rise and fall as they need to and this is what maps out the terrain of our next growth points and places of deeper inhabitation in our lives. It is often a very powerful sojourn into the unknown of life that launches us into our most profound awakenings and healing. This is what leads us, by the heart, into our Sacred Humanity and all that this new phase of humanity entails… ❤

With you, in whatever mourning processes you may be going through, as I am also in the various layers of mine…

Kalayna ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

BEing Real, Riding The Emotional Waves

By Jelelle Awen

 

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Raphael and I in San Sebastian, Mexico

I was feeling tiredness yesterday and today I am feeling in glow and flow….softer, surrendered, open. This is how the waves of energies seem to impact and invite us to ride our own inner waves of emotional body waters, especially in this now of August 2017 and Lion/Lioness/eclipse frequencies. I was with the tiredness that came from some recent situations (growing pains in the best way as our community grows) plus what was DEEP in the collective Metasoul (and mine too) from those of us choosing to lead in so many different expressions and ways in so many timelines and realities (as so many of you shared about yesterday too in resonance). We need to feel this bone and soul deep tiredness at times, be willing to BE with it because it is REAL and we serve ourselves immensely and the collective in our feeling of it.

It was fascinating to me yesterday that sharing from that tiredness, yet, also offering the ultimate choice of love (as being with that tiredness IS a choice of love), I then received probably the most response I have on any of my facebook posts in terms of the amount and volume of comments, likes, and sharings. I so appreciated the vulnerability in many of the comments and the PURE love and appreciation for me and what I am leading and sharing as well. It was overwhelming to be honest and I did some checking in with my guides and Metasoul aspects for support to hold it, let it in, and respond to it and to take my next steps into leadership….moving into the new for myself and away from experiences of the past with ‘crickets’ in the room and very little response. Because I have engaged in much egoic/false self deconstruction work through parts work process and many death/rebirth phases around offering my gifts, there doesn’t seem to be a self image-based version of me grabbing onto this attention, yet rather I feel a ‘beyond personality’ energy inside of me (the higher self coming into body) that responds to serving love…..AND trailing edges/echos of parts of myself that get kicked up and triggered at times too (although this is not much these days.)

It really struck me again how there is so little permission in our 3D culture to feel, to be real…and this seems to have translated to our spiritual/awakening culture as well, although I do feel there is an increasing waking up to this bypassing of emotional reality and the cost of it. The ultimate cost is in what then doesn’t get to feel the light of your love…..creating a shaky foundation for which MUCH energy is needed to keep it all intact to maintain the appearance of being shiny and bright.

I can only share and teach and lead and BE what is emotionally authentic for me…this has taken MANY years of feeling what is not authentic and the parts of me that create these not real frequencies and why. I cannot pretend to be light, high, and UP if I am not. Or spacious and kind if that is not what parts of me are feeling. That doesn’t mean that I get to kick out or abuse or project at others….I hold myself responsible for my emotional reality and its impact in a very deep way (probably more than most souls can even track and at micro levels after many years of parts work.) I don’t feel this realness disqualifies me from leading or teaching, yet, rather is the new grounds of qualification for leadership in New Earth….realness, vulnerability, self permission, NOT pretending to be strong and brave, NOT being a warrior who ‘toughs it out’ yet rather to be soft, open, and also REAL about what we are feeling when it isn’t soft and open. This New Earth leadership empowers every soul to BEcome a leader of themselves, inside, and most importantly at the emotional body level where there is often the most immaturity and unhealed woundings.

The permission I am offering here is what I feel the Divine is also offering us ALL. For so long parts of us have played in this 3D experiment of pretend and get by, worn our masks, and followed the rules. THIS is what is collapsing now as those of us in heart and soul resonance are rebelling against this control system and fake matrix. The rebellion phases can have a lot of RAGE pushed up in them, outrage and necessary advocacy as parts of you say ‘no’ to so much of what they were served and conditioned in.

Another phase seems to be surrender to the Divine yet still with DEEP commitment and sense of the New Earth vision and to living it out in the Now. Not as a future goal or when some grand event happens where everyone ascends at once….yet rather a commitment to the process of it, to the every moment of it, to the ups and downs, to the highs and lows, to the dark and the light. A commitment to the mess of it and to the beauty of it too…..the bliss mess of it. This commitment, really, is to yourself AND to the collective too and that you’ll stay with the process and ‘in the room’ as it all falls apart and is reborn again.

This commitment is to love and the ongoing service of it…NOT just in the good moments yet, rather, in ALL moments. This is a BIG commitment and I feel how so many of you take it seriously and your own processes first of all. Things ARE shifting, New Earth is here in the now, and our commitment to love is offering us the gifts of experiencing the returns of goodness more and more in our daily lives, as we are meant to.

Thank you for BEing on this journey with me and for your choice and commitment to love. I am HONORED and so appreciative that you are HERE!!!

~

Jelelle Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.com
The challenges of this journey of transitioning into New Earth are immense and ‘going it alone’ is an aspect of the old paradigm and lone wolf phase. We are here in SoulFullHeart for support, guidance, community, empowerment, love if you are ready to receive and give:soulfullheartwayoflife.com/services

Raphael Awen and I are hosting one of our heart opening group calls this Saturday to digest all the influxes in ascension energies and how to be with that on an emotional body level through our parts work process:https://www.facebook.com/events/141617019749771