Tag: shadow work

My Healing ‘Me’ Phase: Sharing My Current Personal Process

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kalayna Colibri

Service of love is a crucible for growth… the growth of those you serve and your own growth too.

How many times I’ve learned this and been humbled by this…

We cannot downplay the importance of going inward and soberly evaluating ourselves, feeling if we SHOULD be serving others right now or if there’s something that needs us deep within first.

As my beloved friend, teacher and Facilitator Raphael said to me yesterday, “It feels right to take the space from facilitating. Without that, it would feel like trying to get at a foundation with a house sitting on top of it, which would be a whole lot more involved process.” Bingo.

Because of this, I’ve made the choice to step down as a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for this emerging phase of my healing and deep need of ME. My heart and soul feel a strong desire to serve love, yet the first step to that is becoming MORE love through being with myself and my parts. Without doing this, my space holding isn’t as deep as I desire it to be and not as helpful to the facilitant – the person making the vulnerable and courageous choice to lean into me for that 90min and maybe beyond – either. not to mention that the space held isn’t as safe as it needs to be for the healing to flow from my own love overflow into them to support their own.

I feel too how this process is not just about me as an individual. I feel how this is something that many space holders neglect to look at in themselves and as a result their parts can feel “burnt out” or resentful of their clients instead of in collaboration and heart-openness, which can lead to outright abuse or perhaps something more subtle. I feel how there is something for all of us to feel, whether you call yourself a “lightworker”, “space holder”, “wayshower”, “energy healer”, etc about how much you genuinely care about the person you’re offering healing to, how much respect and love you authentically feel for them, and if there are unowned judgments, triggers, pieces coming up inside of you that need you to show up to feel them in your own space, maybe even taking a break from offering healing to others for a phase, in the name of your own healing and self love growth. The biggest block to being able to vulnerably feel all of this inside of yourself feels to be the block of an overfocus on self-image, forgetting and maybe even hiding that you are also a humbly healing and ascending human being.

My beloveds in this community and healing path of SoulFullHeart have brought me many reflections over this past week that have given me plenty of pause and entry points into my heart too… to see why exactly I’ve been the way I’ve been when what I want is to be and serve love. This was a major sign of something big being out of alignment… we cannot put on the “healer hat” and be one way in sessions while we let parts of us run the show in other areas of our life and relationships with far less care, without one reality spilling over into the other sooner or later. And since the shadow is always wanting to be seen, felt and held, of course this is where the spillover is most likely to happen…

As my process unfolds, I’ll probably share more of the clarities I feel, because in this way I still feel called to serve love and see how what I’m discovering lands in the hearts and souls of others. I hope that even this writing which is more personal lands somewhere helpful inside of you. ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart co-founder, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Awakenings Invite Integration, Not Avoidance Of Life

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

by Kalayna Colibri

Awakenings are not meant to be a ride into a ‘Neverland’ experience where you are exempt from life in some form because you have crossed into newly expanded consciousness.

Awakenings are an invitation into an integration of soul and body, spirit and matter, that is often SO challenging because you cannot pass through a birth canal without some oomph.

You still have to put your pants on and walk out your door… find ways to move through your life’s challenges with grace (though not always with ‘ease’), take phenomenal risks that maybe nobody who came before you in your 3D-based bloodline has ever dreamed of, maybe trip here and there, yet still find ways to come back to that YOU inside of you that your parts have been waiting for to show up consistently.

Not one area of your life can be avoided when on this path as love doesn’t caretake the compartments parts of you have carefully made for the phases of life in which they needed to make them. Awakenings open the doorway for love to flood your life’s compartments and your parts need you to show up for the pain this can cause them. This is a real, visceral sense of the integration invitation from awakenings… and it’s all held in something much, much bigger that you’re now getting a taste of.

And then, when you’re truly ready from the inside-out (NOT outside-in through certifications or any official word from anyone or anything outside of you) you WILL be called upon to embody this service of love you’ve been offering to yourself and offer it to others. And this… this will be the deepest, grandest awakening of all… That you are living into your healing in order to support and connect with others in their own… because we are all inescapably LOVE — made of love, bathed in love, and given love in every single moment of every single breath on this sacred and beloved planet we call “Gaia” and every single one of us, along with every single PART of us, deserves to remember and embody THIS to the deepest degree that they possibly can in this and any other lifetime. ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 35, emoto-spiritual teacher, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Sacred Stories W/Raphael & Jelelle On The Enlightened Loveheart & Soul Show (Audio Recording)

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

by Jelelle Awen

This is the recording of a wonderful interview that we did last week on the Enlightened Loveheart & Soul Show with resonant host Crystalline Diamondloveheart. It is almost TWO HOURS of interesting conversation sharing our stories. We talk about coming together in sacred romance as well as how we moved from 3D money earning, to giving it all up to live on an off-grid ranch to reset our relationship to abundance and gratitude for is truly the most important…the inner journey to self-love and deepening union with each other. We also connect the gifts and wisdoms they gained from challenges in their lives to the parts work process that allowed them to navigate them.

This provides a great INTRO to us, our journeys, and our SoulFullHeart work. We also have a special offer discount package on a session, my books, etc. that you can read more about here: http://www.theenlightenedloveheartandsoulshow.com/jelelle-…/

Go here to register to receive and be involved live in all future Enlightened LoveHeart & Soul shows: http://www.theenlightenedloveheartandsoulshow.com/

 

 

Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of three books about Ascension, awakening, and emotional body healing. Jelelle offers a 90 minute one on one bridging session with her over zoom for $55 USD min. donation…more information here. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about our NEW SoulFullHeart process programs, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Full Moon Codes Support BEcoming Our Service Of Love Selves

Published on by Jelelle Awen2 Comments
By Jelelle Awen
I felt the energies of the full moon starting to beam down last night, woken up in the night by Her illumination. I was able to drift back to sleep listening to soothing music as I wanted to take in more of what She had to offer into my unconscious mind/heart/body.  I can feel how today, April 29th, is a good one to go INward, open up to 5D and higher journeys, open up to feelings, open up to realizations/revelations and inspirations!
 
I am feeling so grateful and blessed in this NOW moment of love coming up from within and coming UP to be shared with others in service through SoulFullHeart, nearly every day with sessions and/or an Unity Meditation call or a radio interview. I am grateful for this NOW moment of BEing invited to step up and share, as we all are who have been awakening to who we really ARE as love.
 
These powerful full moon codes are supporting us becoming our service of love/5D selves! They offer Divine Feminine support for integration after so much Sacred Masculine activation energies from the sun recently. It is the important integration process (letting in) that allows us to truly change and transform into our Service Of Love Self in more and more moments! The more deeply we have embraced the integration phase, the more we can bring all those light codes into our every living cell, emotional bodies, and chakra vortexes.

I feel these Divine Feminine codes saying:

Go in, feel and heal, make yourself ready, and share in the overflow of the love that comes as a result.

THIS is the reason we are gifted with the guidance, with the vision, with the goodness AND the pain, with the lessons that come out of struggle…to serve love. THIS is the reason we are gifted with ascending and remembering more sense of the higher frequencies of our Metasoul/Higher Self soul source consciousness.

THIS reason, to serve love as our highest purpose and calling….THIS reason wants to rumble through your life and offer changes to the how and the why and the way you have lived. THIS reason wants to invite you to complete relationships that don’t serve love yet instead distract you, suppress you, shrink you. THIS reason wants you to claim what you most WANT and DESIRE and DESERVE in union with others and with yourself. THIS reason wants you to claim your soul gifts, express your soul gifts, feel and heal the karmic binds from other lifetimes that suppress you and block you and keep you hidden.

Love can only be served more purely from a heart that is healing and IN JOY from that healing, from light that shines from being with the dark, from what is revealed from being with shadow. Love can only be served more purely from a self that is being deconstructed, dismantled with love and by love, to reveal the self that is NOT driven by unconscious wounding, material gain, and self image but rather is pure in its motive to serve love in all moments, including to self.

THIS service of love from an increasingly PURE heart and soul is the invitation to embody your sacred humanity.

THIS is what the Universe, Divine Source, your guides/Metasoul Aspects, your star families, your soul families are waiting for you to BE and to do.

THIS is what you have signed up to do and why you are here in the NOW at this moment of great transition, turmoil, death and rebirth, of collective and galactic awakening and growing!

~
Much love to and with you as we BEcome our service of love selves in this Now!
Jelelle Awen
~
Join us for a free unity meditation call on Wednesday, May 2nd at 2:00pm CST: More info here: https://www.facebook.com/events/1895682390725143
We offer a bridge from 3D timelines (through parts connection) to your higher/service of love timeline via a 1:1 bridging session (90 minutes for $55 USD min. donation) with me for women and with Raphael for men! soulfullheartwayoflife.com/bridging-session
~
Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of four books about Ascension, awakening, and emotional body healing. Jelelle offers a 90 minute one on one bridging session with her over zoom for $55 USD min. donation with women and with Raphael for men…more information here. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about our NEW SoulFullHeart process programs, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Raphael & Jelelle On The Enlightened Loveheart & Soul Show: Recording

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

by Jelelle Awen

This is the recording of a wonderful interview that we did last week on the Enlightened Loveheart & Soul Show with resonant host Crystalline Diamondloveheart. It is 90 minutes of interesting conversation about embracing rather than resisting your shadow aspects and difficult emotions. We talk about how in spirituality the shadow can be bypassed or try to be ‘cleared’ or seen as ‘negative’ and the gifts of embracing yours through conscious parts work process.

This provides a great INTRO to us, our journeys, and our SoulFullHeart work. I also lead a guided meditation to meet the Protector part of you at close to an hour into the call. We also have a special offer discount package on a session, my books, etc. that you can read more about here: http://www.theenlightenedloveheartandsoulshow.com/jelelle-…/

INjoy and we’ll be appearing on the show again this Thursday, April 26th at 8:00pm BST to share some more of our sacred journey and stories together as a couple on an awakening path. More details coming soon about that and how you can either join us live or to listen to the recording afterwards.

One listener said this about the show on YouTube: “So glad you posted your interview with Crystalline. I was on the live call & the energy you and Raphael brought was out of this world. I’m looking forward to hearing it again. And your meditation was magnificent. So glad your teachings are spreading, the planet is lucky to have you both.”

Go here to register to receive and be involved live in all future Enlightened LoveHeart & Soul shows: http://www.theenlightenedloveheartandsoulshow.com/

 

Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of three books about Ascension, awakening, and emotional body healing. Jelelle offers a 90 minute one on one bridging session with her over zoom for $55 USD min. donation…more information here. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about our NEW SoulFullHeart process programs, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Energy Update: Higher Heart Collective And Personal Healing

Published on by Jelelle Awen2 Comments
By Jelelle Awen
The geomagnetics are picking up…..Body toxicities may flush up again too from these…..flu-like, migraines/headaches, etc. as the cells clean out the memories of sickness and disease and any deathstyles that you may have chosen in the past. You may have felt them in the night and found that you couldn’t sleep too deeply. Like a hum moving through or a buzz….lighting up the cells, stirring up DNA, activating crystals. I was awake around 2:00am feeling like I had eaten sugar or drank caffeine, even though I had not. I listened to soothing music and eventually drifted back to sleep again.
 
I also felt a sadness move through my Higher Heart that felt connected to the emotional body pieces that I have been feeling more with women in sessions lately. Now that we are a couple months into regular, weekly sessions together, there is an opportunity to feel through the tender places connected with core woundings that just SO need love and attention and have often been layered over by Protectors. Getting to these deeper places is a relief and offers such a big release and I always feel honored to witness, hold space, and offer my heart/soul to serve these movements.
 
Also, I was digesting a touching movement with Raphael Awen and Gabriel Heartman yesterday that I helped bridge to as we connected to the sacred masculine Metasoul frequency. These two beautiful men who have been in my life longer than any others are leading and exploring NEW frequencies of sacred masculine based in vulnerability AND strength that arises from within and in brotherhood together. They are truly kings of the heart and soul, which was so evidenced in their experience of THREE timelines overlaying each other in which they connected to Metasoul brothers of theirs (similar to past lives only happening in the Now and from the same soul source yet NOT them).
 
The three of us went to these battlefields and invited the putting down of arms, weapons, and battling….which these brave Metasoul brothers accepted and are now in recovery. It was beautiful!! So much more I could share about this yet it feels likely that they will write about it soon. I highly recommend either of them as space holders if you are a man looking to expand your soul and even more deeply heal your heart to embody your sacred masculinity! soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions
 
Tonight (April 19th) is when the windstream carrying pure sun codes from the widening coronal holes to make us WHOLE will really be coming in….to probably be felt more strongly even tomorrow. I feel as if those of us ahead of the curve in ascension feel these energies on the tip or leading edge of them, before they really ‘land’ in the atmosphere where they are then received and experienced more collectively.
 
April 20th feels important though….offering more of a collective infusion and activation to be felt by more souls than ever. Consciously felt. Some souls will still see and experience this at a 3D level, yet more will be asking if there is something deeper going on. The cries of the world ARE loud and getting louder, yet more hearts and souls are awakening within themselves to answer these cries and to respond to them with love and compassion.
 
More rumbling activities are happening in political disclosure (as it moves from 3D into 4D transitional phase) so this may be connected. These energies offer activations of choice points based in serving love and moving the ascension process onward….whatever that means in each particular situation.
 
MUCH love to you from my heart and soul to YOURS as we journey into those places previously feeling dark and unknown that become familiar and beloved through the light of our love!
~
Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of four books about Ascension, awakening, and emotional body healing. Jelelle offers a 90 minute one on one bridging session with her over zoom for $55 USD min. donation with women and with Raphael for men…more information here. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about our NEW SoulFullHeart process programs, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Embracing Your Shadow Aspects During These Intense Energy Shifts: Teachings And Guided Meditation (Video)

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

In this audio recording of a live Unity Meditation call, SoulFullHeart co-creators, teachers, and facilitators Raphael and Jelelle Awen teach and share about the geostorm energies and SOULar winds that occurred during the past week. These cosmic weather events helped to illuminate personal processes, such as galactic awakenings and unearthing shadow aspects and wounding. Physical symptoms may have been a factor as well. The invitation is to embrace these energies with curiosity and self-love. Connecting with your Inner Protector is what helps to negotiate the access into the shadow and hold space for what comes up.

SoulFullHeart Facilitators and co-founders Gabriel Heartman and Kalayna Colibri then share about their personal processes during this phase of intense upgrading. At 35 minutes, Raphael and Jelelle then lead a guided meditation to connect you with Mother Mary and Archangel Metatron, along with your Protector. You are guided to go underwater, under a lake in the light of the moon. You enter a building and pull back a veil to reveal whatever is meant to be seen that has been previously hidden in shadow.

The touching, personal sharings that followed from the group participants have been edited out for privacy reasons.

This call was originally recorded on April 14th, 2018 via zoom. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about future Unity Meditation calls that you can join live for FREE, our SoulFullHeart Ascension Programs, bridging session with Jelelle or Raphael, writings, community, and more!

To listen to previously recorded SoulFullHeart Group Calls: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/groupcallrecordings

For the latest writings, blogs and videos and information about SoulFullHeart Unity Meditation calls and other events, visit http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

For information about a bridging session with Jelelle or Raphael Awen, a free intro, and ongoing sessions with a SoulFullHeart Facilitator through our programs, visit http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Don’t miss a thing! Get SoulFullHeart’s free weekly Museletter with all our writings and videos from the week via email through subscribing at http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

We gratefully receive any love in the form of money that you’d like to donate to support our offerings: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/donations

Guided Meditation Video To Meet Your Shadow Aspects W/ Jelelle Awen

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

by Jelelle Awen

 

Your shadow contains aspects of you that have been disowned, put away, judged, rejected, protected, and suppressed. Also in shadow can be your soul gifts, soul purpose clarities, and your ‘power’. There are always ‘good reasons’ for this putting away into shadow based on conditioning you’ve received from 3D life and even other lifetimes/timelines, in addition to undigested traumas and karmic patterns. The Ascension process invites you to uncover, feel, and integrate your shadow aspects with love, compassion, and curiousity. Rather than bypass the shadow, it is about embracing it with self love and Divine support.

In this video, SoulFullHeart Teacher, Facilitator, and Author Jelelle Awen leads you on a guided meditation to connect with your shadow. She provides a space of loving support, with help from Archangel Metatron and Mother Mary for you to safely navigate these grounds, to pull back the veil to remember, and to lead this exploration yourself.

You also invite the part of you called the Inner Protector to come along with you on the journey. The Protector can be hesitant and resistant to going deeper into this ground due to concerns about your ability to handle what comes up. This part of you gets to be by your side in this shadow exploration, which can make a big difference in the depth and ways you will feel and digest it. More about the Protector here: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts

This is the music gratefully used in this video: https://youtu.be/FOOqiUbjr2k

For the latest writings, blogs and videos and information about SoulFullHeart Unity Meditation calls and other events, visit http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

For information about a bridging session with Jelelle Awen, a free intro, and ongoing sessions with a SoulFullHeart Facilitator through our programs, visit
http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Don’t miss a thing! Get SoulFullHeart’s free weekly Museletter with all our writings and videos from the week via email through subscribing at http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

We gratefully receive any love in the form of money that you’d like to donate to support our offerings: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/donations

Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of three books about Ascension, awakening, and emotional body healing. Jelelle offers a 90 minute one on one bridging session with her over zoom for $55 USD min. donation…more information here. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about our NEW SoulFullHeart process programs, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Embrace Rather Than Resist: Nothing Inside Of You Is Truly Negative, Dark, Or Evil

Published on by Jelelle Awen6 Comments

By Jelelle Awen

The pain comes from what has been resisted inside of you rather than embraced. The suffering comes from continual loops that pit one energy inside of you against another one. Resistance is feeling anything as ‘evil’ or ‘dark’ or ‘negative’ inside. Resistance is judging without love your body, your behaviors, your choices, your experiences.
 
Resistance is labeling things as ‘negative entities that attack you’ and then going to battle with them or to war with them (even with ‘light’) or trying to cast them out. Such a long legacy of this approach with roots in exorcisms, some Shamanism that now takes the form in New Age spirituality as ‘implant removals’. This feels like fear trying to fight fear with more fear. This only seems to produce MORE fear inside of you and in response to the outside world.
 
To embrace rather than resist is to BEcome curious, to BEcome loving, to BEcome your own ambassador to ALL the energies inside of you. To see all of what has felt like outside that is ‘doing something bad to you’ as actually coming from INside and that it has been necessary to be there. Each of these energies has stories to tell you, pieces of YOUR puzzle to offer you. While you resist them, while you label them as bad or wrong, while you disown or reject them, while you hold tension and panic in your body, while you respond in flight or fight…..you cannot create and hold the loving space to find out and discover what they are here to offer you. You cannot experience the GIFTS that these energies actually have to offer you.
 
These energies arise from often very intense unhealed polarities from one part of you to another; a dominating masculine and a repressed feminine; a dominating matriarch/inner mother and a repressed sensitive masculine; an inner mother/matriarch or inner father/patriarch and a very sensitive yet rebellious inner teenager. One of the usual dynamics is a rather ruthless feeling Punisher part of you and the corresponding shame/unworthiness that comes up in the inner child and inner Teenager in response to it. Another polarization can be the 3D Self parts that are trying so hard to remain anchored into 3D to be ‘safe’ there and the 4D awakening parts and Metasoul aspects that just want to ascend and yet don’t know how to be a bridge. Aspects from other timelines/lifetimes can be hugely polarized against your reality and everyday ‘modern’ living. More about parts and Metasoul aspects here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts
 
To embrace rather than resist is to BEcome a bridge to all of these polarities. To BE in the middle of them with love, to recognize where the source of them comes from, and to provide love to BOTH sides without actually taking sides. This ambassador YOU is watered by the Divine, who never takes sides, who never sees anything or any BEing or any energy as ‘evil’ or ‘truly negative.’
 
All energies serve a purpose in their creation…..until they are ready to move back into love again for which they are being constantly invited by the Divine to do so.
 
This ambassador YOU is your Divine Self, your Higher Self coming into your body. Your Divine Self can offer a brand NEW reality of acceptance and forgiveness to ALL dynamics and polarities and inner relationships that it finds and discovers. Your Divine Self feels when someone else’s unhealed polarities and fear are being projected onto you. When a healer or teacher has not undergone the deep dive into their emotional body and soul field to heal and feel their own polarities, it is difficult for them to offer you a truly uncharged and loving energy in response to yours. Their unhealed fear inside projects onto you and triggers the parts of you that are also in fear. I have seen trauma created from this in seekers and in teachers/healers that are innocent in one way in perpetuating this unfelt cycle with each other.
 
I know this sounds simple in some ways. Embrace rather than resist. Yet, what is challenging about this is that we haven’t been given the language to describe these dynamics. We haven’t been given a model for how to BE this way with ourselves and ALL parts of ourselves. Instead, we have been fed, bred, and served clashing polarities in our governments, in our parents and families relationships with each other and with us, in our religious and spiritual groups, in our professional and cultural societies. This has been 3D going into 4D, to experience this clash of separation, isolation, competition, contention, insecurity, scarcity, distrust, and lack of surrender and to accept it as ‘normal’ and even necessary.
 
ALL of us have received this conditioning as we have chosen to be here during this phase of Ascension with Gaia. To battle and to fight is ingrained in our Metasouls, where multiple and many timelines are playing out these very inner polarities expressing on the outside. To pick up the sword, to lash out in words, to take sides….this has been our dominant experience in 3D and even going into 4D as well.
 
You have probably put down the swords that parts of you used to take up towards others. You probably have forgiven others in a deeply genuine way.
 
Yet, now, is the turning inward and offering to yourself and ALL parts of you what you have extended to everyone else. Now is self forgiveness and self compassion that FLOODS all parts of you with love that transmutes, that transforms, that brings HOPE and infinite possibilities to every cell in your BEing and every remaining trauma and pain in your emotional body. Now is to BEcome your own love ambassador and bring diplomacy and peace to any warring factions that remain inside your BEing.
 
Now is to embrace rather than resist….inviting it all by love and with love to BEcome love once again.
~
We provide support for the arising/rememberance of your ambassador self and a bridge for your connection to all aspects of yourself (led by you) through sessions. More info here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions
Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of three books about Ascension, awakening, and emotional body healing. Jelelle offers a 90 minute one on one bridging session with her over zoom for $55 USD min. donation…more information here. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about our NEW SoulFullHeart process programs, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

What Would The Voice Of Your Shadow Say?

Published on by Raphael Awen1 Comment

By Raphael Awen

If you were just to let the voice of your shadow speak, what would it say?

‘I’m bored as hell a lot of the time.’

‘I like service of others, it’s just people I don’t like.’

‘I know you come across as confident and together, but I feel afraid and confused much of the time.’

I’m afraid nothing new or good will ever happen for me.’

My dreams the last few nights have been about less-than-comfortable and awkward situations with people and life, not nightmares per sé, but maybe my closest version of one.

One of the dreams had a lot to do with my previous career as a painting contractor in situations where everything was going wrong, and I was stressed and very uncomfortable. That makes sense that for 30 years in a career where the conscious focus was about getting paid to make things go right, that a part of me would hold the awareness and fear of everything going wrong. It’s like a part of me used those fears that were parked in shadow of everything falling apart as a motivator to keep things going right. Parts of us use our fears to create our own in-house energy generators.

Here, the deal is that if you work hard at it on a number of fronts, the reward is ‘coming out on top’, whatever a dominant part of you defined that to mean, but at what cost? What about all the off-the-books costs that had to be taken out of account to hold this deal together? How does it really feel now to be in your skin? How do you fare in the domain of meaningful relationships? Do you feel real to yourself? Is sexuality just a teenagers peek-a-boo ground that you run from or that runs from you? Are you dependent on any number of life patterns to hold a semblance of sanity together? What are your real desires and frustrations in each area of your life? If suicide wasn’t frowned upon, would you want to just hit the delete button, or refresh button?

Going here to these questions will really kill the popular quest for happiness-at-any-cost party. It won’t feel good to go here. It will feel like a shit-hell of all that’s been avoided and parked under wraps in shadow. But, what’s the cost of not going here is the deeper question. What’s the real joy and bliss that you are even more afraid of experiencing?

I’m not sure exactly what triggered it for me, it was more of an accumulation of experiences and feelings, but when the ‘more’ sudden shifts came, I simply felt like I couldn’t breathe without getting real with myself and those in my world. My truth had been parked in my shadow and marked a threat to my happiness, but now it needed to pop out. A tipping point occurred that now determined that there was no longer any real happiness to be had in the pretense game of living to others duty and obligation pictures and belief systems, that parts of me also bought into and energized. ‘Fuck it all’ part of me said with a back pressure sufficient to blow the doors of my false world wide open. I told my beloveds that I was no longer a Christian, that I didn’t believe in heaven and hell like we were taught, or that I wanted to remain in my marriage for duty sake. Boom, entire world changed pretty much overnight, with some lead-in, and lots to live out.

Every one of us, I believe are being asked to come to terms with our shadow like never before. My big experience was thirteen years ago. It feels like the times have way intensified since then as Gaia herself and the collective consciousness are taking on their own shadows like the time is now!

So when will you feel done with excelling in one or two areas of life while losing it in the other areas? When will you own all that you really want and desire?

If this speaks to you, then I just had the privilege of mirroring your own truth to you. I have a new party to get on with and I’d like to invite you to check it out. In a few days, we will be announcing a new self-led, self-paced approach to SoulFullHeart called PREP, as well as redefining what we now call DEEP, involving weekly sessions. Both are life changers.

There’s more where this comes from! 
Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about Weekly Sessions, Live Streams, Videos, and Community.

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