Category: Awakening Process

The Scientist, The Sage, & The Artist: Seeking Love Through Experience And Knowledge

Published on by Gabriel Heartman3 Comments

What did your soul come here for? Experience or Knowledge? What did you come here to experience or know?

Healing is a digestion and an integration of this experience into knowledge. I don’t mean the kind of knowledge that you find in books, but the kind that is stored in the depths of our DNA, the unconscious, and our emotional body. Our circumstances are reflections of this inner experiential knowledge data bank and what It is seeking to learn and understand.

The scientist, the sage, and the artist are intrinsically the same.  There is an exploration happening. A reconciliation of an unmet need, an unanswered question, or a prolonged trauma. There is a drive to fix, transmute, understand, or transcend these. Pain is one of those aspects of experience that we try religiously to avoid until it cannot be avoided anymore due to the nature of the Souls journey.

It is hard to wrap our head around why certain people experience certain unimaginable things. It is hard because we don’t really ‘know’ what the soul is needing and wanting to learn and understand unless we get to a place where are deeply curious. This curiosity is what brings the questions that lead us on the quest.

The answers to these questions lie within you. The words of those that have traversed these depths are like guideposts along the way and can provide insight and direction. As a parts work and Metasoul healer, I assist in guiding others to aspects of themselves that hold keys that unlock doorways to places within that hold these answers. They hold the experiences of trauma, depression, anxiety, and dis-ease. By relating to them as parts, and not the totality of who you are or what you are experiencing, you create a space that can bring in context rather than drowning in the content.

The result is a new awareness of yourself as a divine creator seeking to know and experience Love, and often knowing Love is to know Pain until we don’t need it anymore. There is a world of You that you get to become privy to. I call it your YOUniverse because, yeah, you are that damn big and that damn amazing, whether parts of you want to believe it or not. Let’s go find out together.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Loving Your Inner Beast

Published on by Raianna Shai5 Comments

By Raianna Shai

Self judgement and unworthiness are feelings that are hard to reach the root of. It can take years of unraveling just why and how we truly see ourselves and how it plays out in our lives. We can point fingers at all the people who made us feel small. The people who judged us. The people who could never forgive our mistakes. The people who invalidated our feelings.

But what about the part of you that has done all the same things? The part that tells you you’re not good enough. That constantly reminds you of your mistakes. That judges every move you make, every awkward thing you do. What if this part of you wasn’t just judging you, but judging itself? And what if all the hate and anger and insults were just this part’s way of trying to protect you? We are not victims to our circumstances, so anyone or anything that hurts you is a reflection of a part inside that hurts you too.

I’ve been working with this part of me lately, which can be called a Punisher part, to feel how and why my insecurity can get in the way of my own self love and how it affects my relationships. His name is Brutus and he sees himself as a beast – like in Beauty and the Beast. And all of the goodness that lives inside me can be represented by a rose covered in a glass case. He is fiercely loyal and strives to protect this rose by any means necessary. But his version of protection is to judge her until she does everything perfectly – then no one else can judge her.

This part of me is not easy to feel. He is harsh, brutal and very unforgiving. Every person that has ever gotten mad at me, judged me, or insulted me has actually been backed up by him. He takes everything that was said or felt about me and multiplies it by 10. He expects me to do better, he feels ashamed for how I acted or things I said, he punishes me for doing something wrong.

So instead of using the knowledge and intuition he has about my emotions to protect me, he actually just makes me feel worse about it. But one thing I’ve learned is that he just wants love himself. In his vulnerability, he feels so much remorse for how he has made other parts of me feel about themselves and in turn, other people. He feels he doesn’t deserve love or forgiveness.

But the second me and all parts of me truly forgave him, he started to shift massively. He turned into a prince and he could feel all that he has to offer. Intuition, discernment, and a healthy protection and transparency about how I’m really feeling.

So when I am feeling unworthiness or when there is a truth I need to say to someone, I can call on him and his opened out heart to say what I need to say. Instead of letting my hurt build up and explode out, we will work together to be honest and loving to ourselves and others. Because kindness cannot come from an empty vessel. We must cultivate it within ourselves so deeply, that we can’t help but overflow into others.

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, community, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Energy Update: ‘Peak Fear’ Moves Into Love From Within

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

By Kalayna Colibri

Energy update: the New is here… as much as you’re ready to let it in. Yes, it’s exactly like that song by John Lennon that goes, “war is over IF you want it”… if the parts of you that are ready for the battles to end and the fighting to no longer be their primary filter of reality and relationships are ready to let something new in. A new sense of Love and how it infuses and moves through life without a need for sword and dagger.

It’s not so much a matter of asking us to “turn the other cheek”. As I receive this message this morning, I feel it more as an invitation to advocate for your boundaries as needed, even with charge if that’s real for you, but to be willing to feel the impact of your truth and the impact other’s truths have had on you. It’s an invitation to bring our truth with courage and vulnerability, both. And yes, they both can live in you without conflict, as long as the parts of you that have been hurt and even harmed get felt and are held by a growing YOU of heart, soul, and sacred spine too.

Any energy of being ‘against’ is being flushed up to be seen, heard and felt. Parts of you may be good at finding the next righteous battle to fight or protest to walk with. Anything ‘against’ brings in more of this energy and doesn’t actually break the cycle of harm and abuse. Being with the new reality where this is no longer needed doesn’t relieve us from feeling the cries of the world, yet, what are the cries of your inner world? How are these energies of abuse happening inside of you? Fighting them on the outside becomes a never ending war. If we are to evolve and ascend beyond war being a major focus of our human and also galactic consciousness, we have to start within.

This is absolutely a year to really bring everything inward and continue to work it all in your heart and soul. This invitation has always been here, but now that the time of peak fear is underway, perhaps this invitation will start to ring clearer for so many more of us and more consistently too. ‘Peak fear’ means we are at a huge potential turning point… and that the turn to love as the greatest, most important reality, is here and happening!

Much love… ❤️

~

Photo is of the sunset here in Victoria, BC last night. Taken by https://www.facebook.com/pg/ItkasanImages ❤️

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Readiness For Awakening To Love

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

by Kalayna Colibri

There’s a readiness for receiving pure love even if you feel unready… even if parts of you feel like some other condition has to be met on the inside or outside because this is what they’ve been taught to believe about love.

It’s actually in feeling the vulnerability of not being ‘ready’ for it that most invites it in.

Love is Ascension… and Ascension IS love.

You’re enough… your parts are enough. Even in their struggles to feel like they are ‘good’. Even in their contention and resistance to where your awakening and Ascension journey wants to take you next.

You can always receive love. You can always dive in and find the opening inside that can even let just a smidge of it in right now.

Love is actually what we live and breathe. It is the plasma of life around us in our atmosphere. It is the ground in which we grow our food. It is the warm blanket we wrap ourselves in for comfort and the clothes we choose to put on our backs or offer for the backs of others.

Attainment and deep awakening looks and smells different for everyone. It’s not meant to be uniform. It’s not meant to be expected or prepared for. It’s all about returning to love consciousness and how it lives, breathes and expresses in our shadow and light. In the positive and negative. In the masculine and feminine. In polarities of emotions and matrices of consciousness.

We can’t know our next place of deep movement back into love… but we can definitely let in that this unknown is the ride and journey of it and let in the surprise of how it moves in our lives next. ❤️

Much love! 🌹

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Bridging Polarity In Service Of Love

Published on by Gabriel HeartmanLeave a comment

We exist in a polarized dimension. It is not our essence to be fragmented into this and that, yet here we are. It was Divine choice and will to do so. To be so. When we lost the remembrance of that, it was like a babe being lost in the woods coming out of a dream. We saw and felt separateness in our most primal state. So we constructed, suppressed, and experimented with power in order to shore up the fear of that existential and sacred wound.

Timelines and worlds have been created and destroyed in this grand game of hide-and-seek. Seems almost a cruel joke on some level, yet the pain and suffering were the risks inherent in this desire to truly know and experience Love. The Divine has never been complacent to that fact in my heartfelt opinion.

So then what is the purpose of this trauma? This seemingly tragic consequence of the human condition. For those that have faced it heart-on, there is an awareness of this power of Love that goes beyond words and takes you into a dimension of reverence, strength, and awe that was unknown in Its singular state.

We are all a part of that Grand Choice if you truly believe we are a part of this Grand Design. The two cannot be separate, paradoxically enough. So in this way, we have a huge part in this experiment of experience. We feel. We ache. We cry. We scream. We choose. We surrender.

We become aware of this polarity inside as aspects and parts and we build bridges between them. We become aware of their stories, their experiences, their beliefs. From the wounded child/teenager to the fallen kings and queens of our multidimensional timelines. You are this kaleidoscopic tapestry of being that is the seed and vessel of the Cosmos. You are the lightship of leadership that can take us into the New.

This comes with a great price to parts of us that are seeking safety and/or control. There is pain to feel and responsibility to assume, but that is what leads to the greatest and deepest gift that lives within each of us. The power to feel and spread Love as far as the Soul can see.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Photo by Victorien Ameline on Unsplash

The Journey Through Smallness To Return To Bigness

Published on by Raphael Awen2 Comments

by Raphael Awen

Our garden variety anxieties and fears about running out of money, or losing vitality in our bodies, or losing connection with a loved one, are all testament to a much greater loss that occurred for us.

Embedded in our very DNA is a subconscious remembrance that we were expelled out of the garden of oneness, fractured and fractaled out of the Divine, seemingly sentenced to pay homage now to the taskmaster of the knowledge of the duality of good and evil….judgment of self and others now reigning where love once fully danced and expressed.

This fracturing from one into parts is also very apparent in our psyche as the Inner Child and Inner Teenager and Inner Protector are all evidence of this trauma of separation, as they await our awareness to reach out to them.

The really good news however is that embedded in this trauma is the key to not only our full remembrance, as magical as that alone would be, but also to an expansion beyond words or imagination, that we are invited to go find out what it is, living our way into a new garden of Golden Earth, and then integrating that with life in this dimension.

As you explore the traumas held by these parts of you and take their feelings into your heart, you unlock this full remembrance AND this glorious expansion beyond the former glory of what was, and beyond what was given up to the cycle of death and rebirth, into this expanding glory of what and what you really are.

Who are you? You don’t really know, and you can’t know until you do, and then too, as you come into more knowing, you must again surrender to the infinity of the Divine expressing through you, ever fathoming more and more and more.

You are this big! Are you ready to move out of the phase of your necessary smallness exploration?

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Following The Lighthouse Of Our Longing

Published on by Raphael Awen1 Comment

by Raphael Awen

Our deepest longings that feel the most impossible are actually deep messages from our hearts and souls to our more conscious selves, that we are invited to feel.

We are not guaranteed the fulfillment of the outward picture of those exact longings, but rather the things those longings represent. We are guaranteed that the longing itself leads us into something much deeper from beyond the veil of forgetfulness regarding our truer essence and changes us in the process.

This is actually a frightful guarantee to parts of us. We cannot own and pursue the longing without being irreversibly changed.

Following this lighthouse of our longing, that carries the unexplainable homing skills of a pigeon, the longing and desire shifts and changes as we reposition ourselves in relationship to it, leading us to our true heart home.

The experience of the initial steps leads to the next ones. We are afforded exercise of the heart muscles that will be needed for the next steps. The first steps are just as magical as the later ones as each step brings the joy of coming into more and more of our infinite essence.

Falling in deeper and deeper love with our many varied selves, we overflow with true love for all beings and all life.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

A Reflection Of You

Published on by Gabriel Heartman2 Comments

Taking in the lunar eclipse last night I could feel its magic, its uniqueness, and its significance. These are rare occurrences in the span of our lives and the way we take them in says a lot about how we take in ourselves. Do we see ourselves as magical, unique, and significant? There is this awe and wonder that come up inside the collective as these celestial events happen. Many of us take the time to really feel what is being offered to us at this time and we integrate that into our next going on places.

It is easy for us then the next day to go back into the “normalcy” of our daily lives and that feeling of awe and wonder go back into their subterranean holding cells for the next reflection of our grandeur to come around and be reflected to us…maybe in the next 75 years.

But what if you could take that with you? What if that awe and wonder were a daily occurrence and not just predicated on external circumstances? That to me feels like the birthing of a new relationship to ourselves and each other. When you see yourself in the mirror this morning, do you see and feel the beauty, the awesome, and the divine within you? If you don’t, and this holds true for almost all of us to some degree or another, then there is your own eclipse happening inside. It is a sacred eclipse.

This is the part or parts of you that are seeking your attention and love so that they, and you, can start to let in more of this perfection and glory that you really Are. It is the protected places, the hurt places, the unworthy places that cast a shadow of great importance. They are the celestial bodies of your inner galaxy. They are your childhood, your growing years, your relationships, and the karmic timelines of your Metasoul. They are all coming around to be seen and felt once more as a gift and not a burden.

When these start to heal in the warmth or your courageous and compassionate heart, you begin to see that glory and grandeur again. The true you behind the wounded you. Yeah, there you are…power-full, meaning-full, beauty-full.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Lunar Eclipse Supports Feeling Shadow of Polarizations, Invites Unity

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

By Kalayna Colibri

Last night while witnessing the moon’s eclipse and feeling it hanging very close to my field, I was struck by a feeling of emerging sisterhood in my life and process, yet also the potential for it worldwide.

Yet… the temptation for many seems to still be that the way to unify is in anger. The way to find our common ground is to get pissed. To rage. To march. To condemn the masculine… in men yet also in each other. This is masculine versus masculine in the end, leaving the world inside and outside of us without any room for the sacred masculine AND feminine to unite and make love.

Pointing fingers, protesting, arguing without care of where and how it lands in each other is a phase of our relationship to each other that wants to move into something new. It’s a deep shadow expression of our fear of actually loving ourselves and each other. It’s a fear that the cycles of pain will continue while we continue to become a cog in the wheel, contributing to this cycle with that same fear. Real intimacy brings up a lot more than anger and push-away. It brings up tears and vulnerability, it brings up what’s underneath the rage and presses the heart to open in order to keep giving and receiving nourishment.

This picture of relationship I’m describing is not idealized or impossible… I get to live this every day, I get to be challenged by the presence of others who want to keep this flow going within themselves and with me, I get to feel and meet the challenge of continuing to move through my resistance to love and to keep letting it in… knowing full well that doing so means walking into fires of personal funeral pyres as the old way of approaching life and others passes away, and also knowing that it means getting to experience the heaven of a deeper and easier love flow than I’ve ever experienced before.

Even last night… sharing intimacy with my mate Gabriel, feeling his admiration of myself, my body, my heart and soul, I felt my admiration for his and let his male gaze into every pore. I felt so many tears come up and out like a fountain, feeling the pain of my soul and heart in relating to the masculine in ways that weren’t nourishing on either side and feeling afraid of it. Feeling the pain of a collective of women and what they’ve experienced and also the pain of the men who have not ever been initiated into how to make real love with a woman and what it feels like to be truly met or felt on their side either.

The more energy that’s spent in blame-game shaming and pushing away at each other, the less opportunities we create for the deep healing and nourishing intimacy that’s possible, that wants to bloom and blossom starting between parts of you that are polarized to each other but who want love more than anything else in this world. Starting to see and feel these dynamics within is the best and most profound way to shift what you draw in your outer relationships and what you start to see is really possible with each of them. ❤️

For support as you go into this territory and really feel how it all applies or could apply to you, my beloveds and I hold sacred session space for these explorations and more: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Processing Rage Into Passion With Care

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

By Kalayna Colibri

Rage sometimes pours out like volcanic lava, ready to burn and melt down, create a reset or reboot as it moves through. We’re barely into 2019, yet already we are feeling what it’s pushing up… more to look at within, more to feel rage at but then find the real hurt and vulnerability underneath it. Anger and the parts that feel it need to be validated. It’s meant to help elucidate what isn’t ok anymore, what needs boundaries set around it, and what needs shifting in any area of your life.

Rage can also become an addiction, like anything else. It can be used by parts of you to self-medicate and avoid feeling vulnerability. It can also be used to avoid feeling others and your impact on them, which, even though they may answer your anger with their own and not seem impacted in a deeper way, they have been… as have you. Your anger has impact on your parts too, especially the ones that do feel more hurt and sadness, self-consciousness, ache for love.

There’s nothing to control here, but there’s a ton to feel and keep feeling. There are so many questions to keep asking. The fire of anger and frustration is needed in phases of awakening and moving forward in your life, yet ultimately it wants to be transmuted into passion and taken in the direction of creation, not destruction. The direction of love… heart-centered and fulfilling.

We cannot skip this step of truly feeling it and getting the good stuff on the other side of it. There’s so much it needs to rumble with yet also so much it needs to shift into as the dust and ashes settle on the new ground being birthed within. The rageful warrior inside holds an invitation to move into a role of ambassador of heart and soul, dropping the sword and baring the heart. This is important to remember, even as the fire burns you up from the inside and wants to spread into your outer world too.

There is ultimately no ‘other’, even when you feel opposition. And if that’s really true… there is always a ton of reflection to take in and be with, get real about, and start loving from these increasingly passionate places within.

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.