Tag: Love

The Journey Through Smallness To Return To Bigness

Published on by Raphael Awen2 Comments

by Raphael Awen

Our garden variety anxieties and fears about running out of money, or losing vitality in our bodies, or losing connection with a loved one, are all testament to a much greater loss that occurred for us.

Embedded in our very DNA is a subconscious remembrance that we were expelled out of the garden of oneness, fractured and fractaled out of the Divine, seemingly sentenced to pay homage now to the taskmaster of the knowledge of the duality of good and evil….judgment of self and others now reigning where love once fully danced and expressed.

This fracturing from one into parts is also very apparent in our psyche as the Inner Child and Inner Teenager and Inner Protector are all evidence of this trauma of separation, as they await our awareness to reach out to them.

The really good news however is that embedded in this trauma is the key to not only our full remembrance, as magical as that alone would be, but also to an expansion beyond words or imagination, that we are invited to go find out what it is, living our way into a new garden of Golden Earth, and then integrating that with life in this dimension.

As you explore the traumas held by these parts of you and take their feelings into your heart, you unlock this full remembrance AND this glorious expansion beyond the former glory of what was, and beyond what was given up to the cycle of death and rebirth, into this expanding glory of what and what you really are.

Who are you? You don’t really know, and you can’t know until you do, and then too, as you come into more knowing, you must again surrender to the infinity of the Divine expressing through you, ever fathoming more and more and more.

You are this big! Are you ready to move out of the phase of your necessary smallness exploration?

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Following The Lighthouse Of Our Longing

Published on by Raphael Awen1 Comment

by Raphael Awen

Our deepest longings that feel the most impossible are actually deep messages from our hearts and souls to our more conscious selves, that we are invited to feel.

We are not guaranteed the fulfillment of the outward picture of those exact longings, but rather the things those longings represent. We are guaranteed that the longing itself leads us into something much deeper from beyond the veil of forgetfulness regarding our truer essence and changes us in the process.

This is actually a frightful guarantee to parts of us. We cannot own and pursue the longing without being irreversibly changed.

Following this lighthouse of our longing, that carries the unexplainable homing skills of a pigeon, the longing and desire shifts and changes as we reposition ourselves in relationship to it, leading us to our true heart home.

The experience of the initial steps leads to the next ones. We are afforded exercise of the heart muscles that will be needed for the next steps. The first steps are just as magical as the later ones as each step brings the joy of coming into more and more of our infinite essence.

Falling in deeper and deeper love with our many varied selves, we overflow with true love for all beings and all life.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

The Grail Pursuit Of Soul Tribe

Published on by Raphael Awen1 Comment

by Raphael Awen

The desire to find and be a part of Soul Tribe feels like it is increasing exponentially for many of us in the times we are moving through. 

It’s a feeling for me that has always been there in my life. At times, it has expressed in really applying myself to the tribe at hand, be it my birth family, my current circle of friends, my church family, a spiritual group, etc. What I found for myself personally was that the deeper I pressed into the family at hand, the sooner I found myself uncomfortably at the exit door to the relationship. While the exit door was usually an exit of my own choosing, as I was always welcome to drop what I was advocating for and needing, stop rocking the boat, and instead settle in for the life-long haul, I seemingly couldn’t stop myself from moving on.

Something has always felt at stake. Something has always felt that I needed to choose, to pursue, to desire, and to need. Something has always also felt that I wanted to be needed, to be chosen, to be desired, and to be needed. What has changed is the frequency bandwidth that I am broadcasting at in all of that wanting and needing. This then, in turn, led to natural moving on points, that I was being invited to step into.

Some people work hard to quell these feelings, and though there have been times that a part of me could envy living that way too, I keep coming back to a ‘search for the holy grail’ kind of living, and to do that with Soul Tribe.

My Soul Tribe is about the wanting, the needing, the desiring, the rocking the boat when the boat is needing to be rocked or even capsized. It is about the entering and the leaving. It is about completing one context of life so to be able and energized to enter the next context of life. It is about the endless curiosity expansion into the unknown. 

My Soul Tribe is about feeling all the losses along the way, to mourn them, to grieve them, to allow the next phase of Soul Tribe to arise and overflow into my life as I currently know it. 

My Soul Tribe is about feeling my truth resonate inside the tribe, where even a natural and healthy ‘conformity for love’ can breathe that isn’t a codependent grasping for love. I get to conform when I want to and need to. I also get to be uniquely different when I want to and need to. I get to do it all and be it all inside of community. I get to need and want love. I get to be loved. I get to feel all the parts of me who are in different stages of their own relationship to love and community. 

What is your Soul Tribe about? Are you in a ‘lone-wolf’ between phase that is preparing the courage to pursue again? Are their past tribe wounds that are wanting to be felt by you? Are there parts of you who refuse to ever risk again, while at the same time, other parts of you aching for real resonant heart and soul frequency community? 

SoulFullHeart is one such tribe. I belong to it and co-lead it. Session space is offered as the clear doorway into it. If it calls to you, I’d so love to host your inquiry further, all the way to the deeper and richer unknown that your soul can’t resist pursuing. 

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Aligning To Presence And Joy Through Feeling

Published on by Gabriel Heartman2 Comments

Where would you rather be today? What would you rather feel today?

If you have a ready answer then you may not be in alignment with Presence and Joy. I don’t think many, if any of us, can honestly say they are in that space all the time. It is like an airplane that is on course to its destination is never on a straight line path. It needs to self-correct and readjust. These questions are just reminders to be conscious of what we really want and need in any given moment.

So many things bring us out of this sweet spot of Presence and Joy that seem nearly impossible to parts of us that can ever change. A physical condition, a social relationship, a job, financial concerns, or emotional trauma. These are the things that can feel like an infinite wall to climb, to conquer, or to master. Even using those words put you in a power struggle with the only thing that can move it….deep and honest feeling.

We are hard-wired for Presence and Joy, yet we have the software to take us out of it. Maybe it is our freeware as it is our Free Will. We do choose this life, these circumstances. These choices are a response to so much experience both this and other lives. You are not a simple switch, but a powerful tapestry of wounding and reaction. Whether expressed or suppressed. These woundings are your story and your script if you allow them to continue.

The healing of them is not a simple shift of perspective but a courageous dive into the deep end of your heart and soul. The process of healing leads you to more Presence and more Joy as these energies inside of you get their time to be felt, held, and healed with support. This has been a daily process for me over the last six years that continue to offer the fruit of this divine experience. I am never totally in that space all the time. I am progressing toward More. It is in that progress that I continue to feel what it is I need to feel as it arises in my heart.

That is the hallmark of transformation and ascension. Claim it and courageously walk it out. I am here to walk with you if you need it.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Gabriel: Rebirthing And Arising King Of Heart… Happy Birthday!

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kalayna Colibri

I don’t think we will ever fully understand this unraveling mystery of us… our connection that somehow keeps opening out, even with moments of tension, fear, and remembering the poignancy of what we have together. We have walked out many crucibles individually and as a couple too, including years of moving through different forms and depths of connection in our relationship together.

I feel how far we’ve come… how far you’ve come as a leader, a King-man, a lover, and heartist, and how that keeps everything alive! You’re in a new phase of really wearing your crown and showing up as the WayShower through the shadowland that you ARE. I have never met anyone who loves their shadow more than you, beloved. You have been so courageous and willing to keep going in and not faltering in that quest. I deeply admire and love you. I feel my parts appreciating your light and your encouragement, overflowing from the ways in you love love and encourage your own parts to keep showing up and keep feeling. Your beacon is lighting up… your inner space is broadening to let in more of those you’re meant to serve through this being that you are and keep becoming more of every single day.

For you… ❤️

Built on impermanent sands this castle is

Phase after glorious phase

With frolicking roses and the tallest trees,

Fertile ground for fruitful bounty

Of where lovers hearts can go together.

Foraging love from each bush and channel

Each shadowed branch

From seeds unknown

Brings new mystery to this USness

We have only just discovered

Has more depth

Than we could have known

In previous lifetimes in THIS lifetime!

With expanding wings,

glistening crown,

And elaborate shell,

Your eagle King

And turtle monk

Serve love with you

In all moments

And each turn of your heart-light

Toward the new and renewed.

I am honoured

And in deep admiration

Of the man that is you…

Thank you…

For all you are

All you will be

And all you call for me to see in me too.

I love you! ❤️🔥

Happy Birthday!

Love,

Kalayna

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

A Reflection Of Me

Published on by Gabriel HeartmanLeave a comment

Birthdays are interesting days. Parts of us have interesting reactions to them. They want to run, hide, enjoy and celebrate. From an essential point of view, every day is a birthing day. We get to arise new into our BEing and make a mark onto the world and into ourselves. We can create, learn, and grow from all our experiences and relationships.

Yet, on THIS day, third dimensionally speaking, we began a quest and a journey where we chose to forget this essential remembrance in order to find our Selves again. We demarcate a point in spacetime to reflect, appreciate, and honor life itself. For me, it is letting in time to love myself and this inner world of parts and Metasoul aspects that are a part of this healing and leading quest that I have chosen. It is also about giving thanks to those that have been an intimate and integral part of it….my beloved soul family and those that have been a part of this wild ride of ascension.

Today I am honored to be in a sacred union romance with Kalayna Colibri, who has been a beacon for my soul and heart for six years now even when we were just “friends”. She is the Queen to my King and for whom I am madly in love with. She has never ceased to call to my bigness as well as seeking her own. A part of me has called her the one he never saw coming, but somehow I knew different.

I have known Jelelle Awen for almost 30 years now, which seems to span lifetimes and dimensions. She is the one that showed me life when parts of me only saw suffering. I have died and come back to life many times from her vision and remembrance of who I am when I was too confused to do the same for myself. She is a mirror of my bigness and that frankly scares the shadow out of me! A true gift to me every single year.

In this quest of the Sacred Masculine, there has been one man by my side in this feminine offering. Raphael Awen has been a template of a father, brother, teacher, mentor, guide, and King. He has gone deep into all relationship with a courageous vulnerability that stirs the heart and defies what we as men are used to seeing from the collective and for that, I am forever changed.

My daughter, Raianna Shai, has shown me that Joy is the natural location of Soul. Her unique soul, ever since she was a wee one, has always been on a course to bring this Joy to others in the world, even when that joy has been met by heartache and challenge. She is far more than a daughter, but a teacher and a reminder of what our essence truly IS.

And then there is all of those that have been a part of this experiment and journey called SoulFullHeart. The courageous hearts and souls that have gone into the Deep and continue to do so. You are inspiring and amazing and I am honored to have you all a part of my life. I have much gratitude for all the people that have been followed my words and been touched by them. Your reflection and letting in is a daily gift to me as well as a joy and honor.

So on this day of a personal Earth birthing, I celebrate you and me together. Now let’s go eat cake on our behalf!!!

Love to you all and thank you again for all you ARE.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.


A Reflection Of You

Published on by Gabriel Heartman2 Comments

Taking in the lunar eclipse last night I could feel its magic, its uniqueness, and its significance. These are rare occurrences in the span of our lives and the way we take them in says a lot about how we take in ourselves. Do we see ourselves as magical, unique, and significant? There is this awe and wonder that come up inside the collective as these celestial events happen. Many of us take the time to really feel what is being offered to us at this time and we integrate that into our next going on places.

It is easy for us then the next day to go back into the “normalcy” of our daily lives and that feeling of awe and wonder go back into their subterranean holding cells for the next reflection of our grandeur to come around and be reflected to us…maybe in the next 75 years.

But what if you could take that with you? What if that awe and wonder were a daily occurrence and not just predicated on external circumstances? That to me feels like the birthing of a new relationship to ourselves and each other. When you see yourself in the mirror this morning, do you see and feel the beauty, the awesome, and the divine within you? If you don’t, and this holds true for almost all of us to some degree or another, then there is your own eclipse happening inside. It is a sacred eclipse.

This is the part or parts of you that are seeking your attention and love so that they, and you, can start to let in more of this perfection and glory that you really Are. It is the protected places, the hurt places, the unworthy places that cast a shadow of great importance. They are the celestial bodies of your inner galaxy. They are your childhood, your growing years, your relationships, and the karmic timelines of your Metasoul. They are all coming around to be seen and felt once more as a gift and not a burden.

When these start to heal in the warmth or your courageous and compassionate heart, you begin to see that glory and grandeur again. The true you behind the wounded you. Yeah, there you are…power-full, meaning-full, beauty-full.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

The Pain Of Letting Go Into Love

Published on by Raianna Shai2 Comments

By Raianna Shai

Letting go is one of the hardest processes we go to through in our lives. Whether it’s letting go of a career, a pattern/habit, a geography, or a relationship it can bring up so much for us to process. Letting go is so much harder than holding on.

Parts of us can judge us for our decision – feeling that you made a mistake, that you hurt or disappointed someone, that you did something wrong or will regret your decision. The best thing to do here is to feel compassion for this part. Give it love knowing that it just wants the best for you and it may be scared that it couldn’t protect you from this pain you may feel.

Letting go is painful but it also leads to a beautiful new beginning. Maybe you get that new job you always wanted or a geography that inspires your heart and soul. Maybe you get the chance at a new phase of an old relationship or a new one that reflects the love you have cultivated inside.

It can feel like you’re dying inside during this process. Like you’ll never feel happy or be yourself again. Or maybe you feel hurt and angry and find it hard to feel why it’s all happening, especially if it felt out of your control. Maybe you can’t feel anything or you can’t stop feeling everything.

And sometimes it comes in waves. A comment here or a reminder there can spark tears at the drop of a hat. Then you have a moment of clarity, a moment of knowing it will all be okay. Then you feel the guilt or the shame and it all comes crumbling back down. These are all parts of you that have reasons for feeling the way they do. Feel the pain, but let the clarity and love hold it all.

Whatever you feel there is always another side of it. A realization waiting to happen. A new love for yourself and life will start to creep in. A new view on what you have and what you want to have will fill your heart and inspire you.

All this can happen if you truly let go. Let go of expectations, let go of judging yourself or others, let go of what others might think of you. Mourn the loss, mourn what could have been and the goodness of what was and then let love fill the space. As hard as that may sound right now, it will come. Whether it takes days, months or years it will come and it will be beautiful.

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, community, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Lunar Eclipse Supports Feeling Shadow of Polarizations, Invites Unity

Published on by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

By Kalayna Colibri

Last night while witnessing the moon’s eclipse and feeling it hanging very close to my field, I was struck by a feeling of emerging sisterhood in my life and process, yet also the potential for it worldwide.

Yet… the temptation for many seems to still be that the way to unify is in anger. The way to find our common ground is to get pissed. To rage. To march. To condemn the masculine… in men yet also in each other. This is masculine versus masculine in the end, leaving the world inside and outside of us without any room for the sacred masculine AND feminine to unite and make love.

Pointing fingers, protesting, arguing without care of where and how it lands in each other is a phase of our relationship to each other that wants to move into something new. It’s a deep shadow expression of our fear of actually loving ourselves and each other. It’s a fear that the cycles of pain will continue while we continue to become a cog in the wheel, contributing to this cycle with that same fear. Real intimacy brings up a lot more than anger and push-away. It brings up tears and vulnerability, it brings up what’s underneath the rage and presses the heart to open in order to keep giving and receiving nourishment.

This picture of relationship I’m describing is not idealized or impossible… I get to live this every day, I get to be challenged by the presence of others who want to keep this flow going within themselves and with me, I get to feel and meet the challenge of continuing to move through my resistance to love and to keep letting it in… knowing full well that doing so means walking into fires of personal funeral pyres as the old way of approaching life and others passes away, and also knowing that it means getting to experience the heaven of a deeper and easier love flow than I’ve ever experienced before.

Even last night… sharing intimacy with my mate Gabriel, feeling his admiration of myself, my body, my heart and soul, I felt my admiration for his and let his male gaze into every pore. I felt so many tears come up and out like a fountain, feeling the pain of my soul and heart in relating to the masculine in ways that weren’t nourishing on either side and feeling afraid of it. Feeling the pain of a collective of women and what they’ve experienced and also the pain of the men who have not ever been initiated into how to make real love with a woman and what it feels like to be truly met or felt on their side either.

The more energy that’s spent in blame-game shaming and pushing away at each other, the less opportunities we create for the deep healing and nourishing intimacy that’s possible, that wants to bloom and blossom starting between parts of you that are polarized to each other but who want love more than anything else in this world. Starting to see and feel these dynamics within is the best and most profound way to shift what you draw in your outer relationships and what you start to see is really possible with each of them. ❤️

For support as you go into this territory and really feel how it all applies or could apply to you, my beloveds and I hold sacred session space for these explorations and more: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Processing Rage Into Passion With Care

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

By Kalayna Colibri

Rage sometimes pours out like volcanic lava, ready to burn and melt down, create a reset or reboot as it moves through. We’re barely into 2019, yet already we are feeling what it’s pushing up… more to look at within, more to feel rage at but then find the real hurt and vulnerability underneath it. Anger and the parts that feel it need to be validated. It’s meant to help elucidate what isn’t ok anymore, what needs boundaries set around it, and what needs shifting in any area of your life.

Rage can also become an addiction, like anything else. It can be used by parts of you to self-medicate and avoid feeling vulnerability. It can also be used to avoid feeling others and your impact on them, which, even though they may answer your anger with their own and not seem impacted in a deeper way, they have been… as have you. Your anger has impact on your parts too, especially the ones that do feel more hurt and sadness, self-consciousness, ache for love.

There’s nothing to control here, but there’s a ton to feel and keep feeling. There are so many questions to keep asking. The fire of anger and frustration is needed in phases of awakening and moving forward in your life, yet ultimately it wants to be transmuted into passion and taken in the direction of creation, not destruction. The direction of love… heart-centered and fulfilling.

We cannot skip this step of truly feeling it and getting the good stuff on the other side of it. There’s so much it needs to rumble with yet also so much it needs to shift into as the dust and ashes settle on the new ground being birthed within. The rageful warrior inside holds an invitation to move into a role of ambassador of heart and soul, dropping the sword and baring the heart. This is important to remember, even as the fire burns you up from the inside and wants to spread into your outer world too.

There is ultimately no ‘other’, even when you feel opposition. And if that’s really true… there is always a ton of reflection to take in and be with, get real about, and start loving from these increasingly passionate places within.

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.