Inner Protector – Page 16 – Divine Self Embodiment Blog (Formerly SoulFullHeart)

Energy Update: Emotional Body Purges Leading To Maturation, Along With Physical

Published on November 18, 2017November 18, 2017 by Jelelle Awen1 Comment

By Jelelle Awen

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Is your body finally ‘catching up’ with ALL the codes that are coming in and the surge of energies that seems to have occurred around the 11:11 portal? It is challenging for the physical body, being necessarily such a dense vehicle needed all your life for 3D navigation here. You could think about it like an outdated (but beloved) computer that is ‘in the shop’ receiving a NEW operating system and exterior too. Being in the shop is all that sleeping and sleepiness; all that feeling of drowsy and groggy; and, in some cases, ‘illness’ and physical pains too.

My body seems to be settling in now to the NEW, integrating and integrated what is able to be received. I’ve been feeling intuitively what it needs right now, which seems to be continuing ‘light-based’ diet of raw fruits mostly and easing into yoga practice. It helps a lot that I have negotiated deeply inside for many years with parts of myself (and my body) that might understandably resist this process and cling to 3D anchors, as I’ve been writing about lately. This ascension process is a MEGA upheaval of all our 3D aspects have known of reality IN the body and in our emotional bodies too. This is a MAJOR renovation projection happening on all levels with Gaia leading the way here. Being able to be WITH the parts of us that are in resistance to fear of this process allows for a more trusting and surrendered navigation of it. And, more capacity to let go of what needs to be during this time of transition.

I am experiencing full, deep sleeping now with intense dreams that seem mostly emotional in what they are offering to digest and look at. This feels more collective than personal for me and a calibration to what is moving through the collective emotional body as it continues to be purified and cleansed by shadow coming into light. The next ‘body’ you may notice getting cleansed, detoxing, and purification is your emotional body, which is also happening on the collective level too. This may come out in sudden emotional ‘outbursts’ (which are really INbursts, meant to take you withIN); being really quite ‘triggered’ by others (which, again, represent YOU and parts of you); conflicts and clashes; and just swells of emotions that seem to come from ‘deep down.’

I feel that the capacity to digest these emotional body purges is usually at a more immature level in many souls. We just aren’t educated, prepared, templated, or trained in how to BE emotionally mature with our feelings. The role modeling you received from your caregivers around how to BE (or not BE) with emotions sets a big template here inside of you. How emotionally mature were they with their feelings? Did they allow them to be with vulnerable and transparent expression (and healing) of them? This isn’t to shame or blame them; it is to understand what and why 3D-based parts of you developed as they did in relationship to your feelings. Maybe you are actually more your Inner Teenager frequencies when it comes to emotional processing that leads to choice points and decision making? Or maybe your Inner Protector, whose main ‘goal’ is to protect and guard and keep safe? More about various parts and Metasoul aspects that we connect with in the SoulFullHeart process here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts

I’ve been offered much loving compassion from guides and Star BEings toward this emotional immaturity in us as a human collective. They admire our hearts and our capacity to FEEL. They admire our tears and our spontaneous expression of them. And, they have offered (over and over) that the cutting edge of our next consciousness evolution is around the maturation of our emotional bodies WITH the integration of our spiritual and soul frequencies. This is an important aspect of what these current codes/information/downloads in the 11:11 portal (through 12/12 feels like as the main surge) are offering us.

To show UP for this new criteria of emotional processing maturity is NOT easy. We offer in our SoulFullHeart process much support, guidance, and empowerment WITH you to bridge to your emotional body WITH integration of your soul downloads too….creating a NEW template inside that is just springloaded inside of you to arise as another expression of you as a fractal from Divine Source.

I feel so much LOVE holding this process with us and, as I said, so much admiration for us too. So much SUPPORT as well in our Metasouls and with Guides and with the Divine for what we are going through, feeling, and healing in this now on ALL body levels!

This is a photo of the sunset codes last night. Raphael and I consciously gazed at and took them in as ‘food’. This is about just breathing them into you for at least 10 seconds or longer, whatever feels right. The best ones (most easy to digest) seem to be when the sun is close to setting. LOVELY food there, yet also catalyzing growth! You might notice that these codes look different than the photos I shared on 11/11….without the striking horizontal band that was in the others and gave the appearance of an ‘eye’.

Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Sacred Feminine and Sacred Union Facilitator, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond.

Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions and a free intro session, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

SoulFullHeart Weekly Museletter: Understanding Why You May Settle, Shrink And Stay Safe: Connecting With Your Inner Protector

Published on November 17, 2017November 17, 2017 by Raianna ShaiLeave a comment

It’s the release of our weekly museletter, offering ALL of our writings, videos, healing offerings, and audio blogs for the week! Go here to read or click on the image below:

SoulFullHeart co-creator Jelelle Awen starts us off this week with her feature article highlighting the pattern of settling, shrinking, and staying safe in terms of working with parts of us that have polarized feelings on the matter. She describes how the Inner Protector part in particular feels perfectly satisfied with safe relationships, because keeping you safe is its job. She then goes on to outline how we would work with this part in SoulFullHeart, through feeling the fear and resistances that live within through questions, readings, sessions, and journaling:

“I am sharing about this from my own experience of my Inner Protector and how this energy shows up…and also from seeing and feeling this dynamic in many other people over the years in sessions. The key to moving this in order to DRAW the more that your Awakening Self wants is through negotiation with your Protector. To feel and hear and get WHY they are concerned, scared, and resistant to this movement. There are always good reasons for this protection, usually stemming from undigested childhood trauma yet, also, from other lifetimes. Just because you cannot consciously remember (or maybe don’t want to remember) these traumatic incidents and events doesn’t mean that don’t impact your daily life in the now. These traumas and karma dramas remain stuck there and energizing STRONGLY, even if you are not consciously as aware of them. To offer compassion to these woundings and the parts that hold them is what moves them through the increasing awareness and consciousness and separation too.”

There was more digestion this week of the 11/11 energies from SouFullHeart facilitator Kalayna Colibri, who feels the importance of taking this time to go within in order to heal these inner dark corners that these energies have given us easier access to. Co-creator Raphael Awen tenderly shares his experiences of letting go of relationships that no longer served him, and feeling how this act is a reflection of his own growing self worth and awakening. Gabriel Heartman, SoulFullHeart facilitator, reflects on 11/11 as Remembrance Day, feeling that it’s a day to remember the love we came from and to feel connected to each other through the wars we’ve all felt as we transition back into love.

Our next upcoming event is a livestream with Kalayna and Gabriel on Saturday, November 25th at 11:11am CST.

We now offer a 30 minute FREE introductory session with a SoulFullHeart facilitator for you to connect what we offer in the SFH process with your life and journey. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions for more information.

We love to share our offerings with you and would enjoy to receive whatever heart donation in the form of money you feel that resonates with our offering. You can go to our donation page for more info on how to donate: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/donations

Thank you so much for your interest and support for SoulFullHeart Way of Life! If you’d like to receive these museletters directly, you can subscribe on our website at: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/writingmuseletters

Here’s another link to this week’s museletter:

http://mailchi.mp/0f8ae7a7cdbd/soulfullheart-weekly-museletter-understanding-why-you-may-settle-shrink-and-stay-safe-connecting-with-your-inner-protector

Anchoring Out Of 3D With Gaia: Steering Your Boat Through Transitional 4D to 5D

Published on November 17, 2017November 17, 2017 by Jelelle Awen3 Comments

By Jelelle Awen

Gaia continues to ascend into fourth dimensional consciousness or transitional consciousness from 3D to 5D New Golden Earth with a big surge seemingly of this in the last few months particularly. The storms, earthquakes, fires, volcanic eruptions, and tornados…all matter of extreme weather are Her growing and birth pains as She labors through to let go of the anchors to 3D frequencies that exist in the very cells of Her plates and crusts. Her death and rebirth, Her churning and burning, Her grasping and releasing process, mirrors our own. The many portals opening up and making available HIGH cosmic light and PURE love energies set Her stage for the next, as they do humanities too.

Anchoring into consciousness states is necessary for our survival and our thrival. We anchored into Gaia’s 3D ‘Earth’ reality as it was the sea for our bodily boat. It is instinct to do this and when we are young we just ‘hook in’ this way to the consciousness around us. We acclimate to the energies around us….of our birth families, of our caregivers, of our geographies, of our educational experiences…and on and on. To NOT anchor in would be to drift and float, to have no landing place, to not be embodied here. To NOT anchor in would most likely be to leave the body and pass on again.

The incarnation experiment in 3D is the choice on a soul level to anchor into frequencies that are much denser, more polarized, and, therefore, fractured in certain ways from the flow of porous, unity consciousness that we are used to as a soul. Many of our other Metasoul aspects (who project off the same higher dimensional soul source as us or Higher Self Source) are still in higher consciousness frequencies. Your Arcturian Metasoul aspect, for example, is most likely in seventh dimensional consciousness or higher. These other Metasoul aspects are anchored into their consciousness as it was what that Metasoul projection choose to experience. Their choice of higher consciousness experience is not ‘better’ than yours. In fact, they are in awe of the effort, strength, bravery, and difficulty it is to BE in 3D consciousness and especially during this 4D transition to becoming sacred human (5D consciousness in the human body.)

This anchoring into 3D here has been SO necessary. This is important to hold as you continue the process going forward of anchoring out of it. As you are feeling and seeing with Gaia’s transition, this is a often tumultuous experience. To anchor OUT of what parts of you are used to feels, on some level, like suicide or, at least, very risky. Your 3D self (and aspects such as the Inner Protector) have invested into the solidity of 3D. They have counted on its density, even if it has often brought up suffering, lack, pain, to BE in it. Your 3D self has gotten used to this suffering ground, this flattened five sense reality processing, this focus on the externalized world rather than the internal one. It has gotten used to the games, delusions, fear-based relationality, and lack of transparency that defines 3D reality. Receiving templates of the wounded masculine in so many expressions, your 3D self internalizes these frequencies and acts them out like characters in a play.

As your soul awakens and your Higher Self chooses to come along with Gaia’s ascension, higher consciousness frequencies begin to drip and sometimes flood into your awareness. Often, they are compartmentalized by the 3D self, put in ‘safe’ bubbles or pockets so as not to disrupt the anchors in actual 3D living. For example, a weekend long yoga or meditation retreat is ‘allowed’, as long as the long term marriage or friendships or birth family relationships remain anchored in 3D reality. Or, surges of awakening and Kundalini energies can move and run through you brought on by peak experiences (such as with Ayahuasca or peyote), yet they may not be integrated into 3D in a way that changes your life to reflect more of your soul consciousness on an ongoing basis or even cause trauma in your emotional body with the lack of digestion of them.

We are seeing and hearing from more souls who are struggling with integration of the higher consciousness frequencies that are coming into their BEings. Parts of them can be living in fear, tension, and anxiety as anchors are being pulled out of 3D by the ascension process and yet still being clung to at the same time by the Inner Protector and other 3D self aspects too. This push-pull of polarization inside by different parts of you is what causes the up into heaven and then down into hell experience that some souls experience of ascension. The swing up and the going down without seemingly a middle landing place to ground in.

Being able to negotiate and digest this UNanchoring process out of 3D with parts of you allows you to navigate it with much less turmoil and suffering. In the SoulFullHeart process, we support you to connect with your 3D self and your Inner Protector. Through feeling the Protector and what their concerns and tensions are about continuing to anchor out of 3D reality, they begin to let go of their fear grip on the process. They start to trust that you (the awakening into 5D self) can take care of the younger parts (such as your Inner Child) that they are concerned about. They need to feel that a YOU that is grounded in growing self love and care is there to hold the process and to ensure a safe transition. You are asking them to take safety anchors out of 3D and put them into a new, unknown consciousness ground often without any or very little support from their 3D world of family and friends. Feeling deep compassion for your 3D self in this process goes a long way, rather than frustration at its resistance.

This process also awakens the 4D Gatekeeper, who is ‘upstream’ of the Inner Protector and is guarding access to your Metasoul. As the Gatekeeper awakens too in your consciousness through the SFH process, they start to allow you openings to connect with your Metasoul aspects and heal both the karmic patterns in those timelines, plus receive infusions and gifts of higher consciousness states from your higher vibe Metasouls. More about the Gatekeeper here: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/gatekeepers

Anchoring out of 3D reality is a process that is ongoing for Gaia and for us. Being able to negotiate and navigate this process from within, to steer your own boat in sometimes very stormy seas, allows you to ride the waves with increasing trust and surrender. Those waves are ALL made of Love, after all, and the final ‘destination’ is the experience of MORE love as your ever waking reality within your human body.

Understanding Why You May Settle, Shrink And Stay Safe: Connecting With Your Inner Protector

Published on November 15, 2017November 15, 2017 by Jelelle Awen2 Comments

By Jelelle Awen

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That which you settle for is that which you will draw MORE of. When parts of you settle, you are telling the Universe that what you currently have and are experiencing is enough for you. Even if another part of you (your higher self coming into your consciousness) feels desires and passions for more…more love, more intimacy, more fulfillment, more soul passion expression…..if you are settling in ANY area of life for less than that, you will draw more of it until all parts of you are truly done with less and lack.

This can be confusing to navigate until you can acknowledge that there are different parts of you that want different things, have mixed feelings and resistances, and are in often direct polarity to each other. To just say that ‘you’ want something and have a desire for more is actually only half of the picture (or less as often parts make up most of our conscious personalities until they are differentiated.)

One part of you (usually what we call in SoulFullHeart the Inner Protector) is ‘in charge’ of keeping you safe and out of harm and from getting hurt. The Inner Protector has been tasked with this since you were a young child as you were too innocent, pure, and vulnerable for the 3D world and the harsh and polarizing energies here. If you also experienced abusive frequencies as a child, then the Inner Protector had to be on ‘double duty’ to protect you. This Protector is reticent and fearful for you to have MORE love in your life as you might lose it and suffer more hurt. Really, it relates to you like a reluctant, over worked teenager would, tasked with watching over a bunch of kids (you). It doesn’t much care what your desires are for change and transformation, as it’s main goal is to keep you safe (despite yourself, it would say.)

The Protector is just FINE with settling, especially in relationships, as to want more is just too risky. Another way this settling of the Protector can show up is in withdrawing from social and relationships completely and being in a lone wolf phase. This can be a sacred phase of reboot when you are pulling out of 3D relationships, especially, but lingering too long here then leads to suffering which leads to isolation, acute loneliness, despair, and even suicidal feelings from other parts of you that NEED connection with others. It seems crazy, but the Protector would rather you (and other parts of you) feel ALL these emotions then to risk you getting hurt again in relationships, especially if there is ACTUAL soul resonance in them. Even if your heart and soul are awakening and aching for more love, more intimacy, to serve love, etc., your Protector (and other parts too) can be countering these desires going out to the Universe by keeping you stuck and settling OR isolated and alone (which is still a form of settling actually.)

I am sharing about this from my own experience of my Inner Protector and how this energy shows up…and also from seeing and feeling this dynamic in many other people over the years in sessions. The key to moving this in order to DRAW the more that your Awakening Self wants is through negotiation with your Protector. To feel and hear and get WHY they are concerned, scared, and resistant to this movement. There are always good reasons for this protection, usually stemming from undigested childhood trauma yet, also, from other lifetimes. Just because you cannot consciously remember (or maybe don’t want to remember) these traumatic incidents and events doesn’t mean that don’t impact your daily life in the now. These traumas and karma dramas remain stuck there and energizing STRONGLY, even if you are not consciously as aware of them. To offer compassion to these woundings and the parts that hold them is what moves them through the increasing awareness and consciousness and separation too.

We’ve spent the last couple of months in SoulFullHeart designing and creating a specific process to navigate this ground with you through weekly sessions with one of us (me, Raphael, Gabriel or Kalayna) to get to know your 3D self that is still anchored to 3D life through these undigest emotional places to begin negotiation with them in order to shift into MORE love in all areas of your life. We also connect with your Inner Protector, Inner Teenager, Inner Mother/Father, Inner Punisher/Critic, and Inner Child. Plus, there is a 4D self/soul awakening path and process that opens out after that the 3D self focused one where we go into all kinds of fascinating and interesting places within your Metasoul to heal on a quantum level LIFETIMES worth while you receive the gifts of soul consciousness expansions.

We provide you with specific writing and reading processes to engage with every week, so you can lean into that with a sense for you (and parts of you) that you are being held by something and headed somewhere. I am very proud of this process as it is the result of 15 years of personal dedication to awakening and specifically emotional body healing integration with spirituality. Also, it was created out of witnessing hundreds of people engage in this kind of parts work emotional body integration process over the years. I know of no other program or process like it as it is truly unique and progressive. You can read more about the process and our free intro session here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sfhprocess

Here is more to read about parts and Metasoul aspects too: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts

To change ANYTHING on the outside first begins from the transformation on the inside. It cannot change otherwise. The strong ascension energies that are available right now are here to support and hold space for this inner journey. To make it safe and filled with lots of love to GO where it has previously felt too frightening, foggy, or unknown to go inside of ourselves….at the emotional body level AND the soul. With this inner connection with parts of yourself, you find that you are no longer settling in ANY areas of your life. A sense of MORE is how you feel inside as you feel new flows of self love open out from within.

Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, videos, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Feeling Your Protective Layers As Downloads Rain Inward – 11/11 Gateway Invitation

Published on November 7, 2017November 9, 2017 by Kasha Rosa3 Comments

by Kalayna Colibri

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NEW inspirations are downloading for you now. Sometimes they trickle in like a light rain from bloated rainclouds. It depends on what you’re ready for and what parts of you are opening up to. Your Gatekeeper, who is another layer of your Inner Protector, gages and siphons off these downpours and INpours of INspiration that want to come to you, to move you into new places in your life, to help you see and make those tough choices and take those challenging steps to reclaim, re-energize and reignite the flame of self-empowerment and love.

The energies leading up to the portal of 11/11 this weekend feel like a soft caress and rock music, all at the same time… there is understanding and love from the Divine and the Multi-verse, and there’s a strong invitation to shake off the dust and awaken to where love is flowing in your life and where it may not be. It’s not a violent shake, yet for some parts of you it may feel that way in moments, as the awakenings come in and take hold of your consciousness, or at least try to. Doorways, portals opening, yes, as they have been continuously, and the most powerful one imaginable is the one that begins to open up to a wider aperture inside of you. This is the one that truly invites in more energies, more upgrades, more loving ways to be in this world. It brings in desires to tread gently yet powerfully, acknowledging how this can seem like a paradox to those who haven’t experienced that you can hold both of these frequencies at once without violence or outrage or wounded masculine expressions of toil and strife, or battles and martyrdom.

If you feel ready for the downloads coming in, you can ask for them, but you cannot bypass what needs to be felt before they can integrate in the way they need and want to. For them to truly go in with love takes a lot of conscious and ongoing holding of the parts of you that don’t want them to or aren’t sure it’s okay. Your Gatekeeper, who I mentioned earlier, is the main aspect of you that is used to holding and blocking so many threads of your potential awakening that they haven’t deemed you to be ready for quite yet (and that they haven’t been ready to let in themselves, either).

My own Gatekeeper, who I first came to know as a defensive Inner Protector or Guardian, is offering to me that my readiness is ripening after what has now been several months of working with her, yet several years of working with parts of me that were dominant aspects of my personality. She says, “the soul and heart maturity level need to match with the maturity level of the arising, conscious Sacred Human, who is striving for spiritual consciousness, not in a mentally-based way, and is deeply exploring their heart and wanting to know more, FEEL more, about who they are and why, who/what the Divine is and why, as well as who they could be destined to become in conscious and empowered co-creation with the Divine… It is important to let in the process AND the downloads, to not simply try and open floodgates that are meant to and need to be there… for now. And too, the Gatekeeper needs to feel this relationship with you as your healing Sacred Human self, to trust the Divine through and with you, as so many (myself included at times, in some layers…) still feel very consciously and unfairly separated from the Divine and therefore, from the powerful force and trance of love that wants so much to flood into you and them too.”

It is a major process to feel into, this acceptance of what is being brought in, and there are many understandable defenses that want to keep it out or filter it in a way that is perhaps more digestible for now. There is nothing that can truly be missed out on here though, as each opening within you does create this ever-widening and expanding portal of access to YOU and to the Infinite Love that is the Uni and Multi-verse we exist in and through.

So perhaps the greatest invitation and inspiration being extended to us all with this 11/11 portal, is more of the same of what comes in with all of them… to continue to acknowledge and deepen the work within, to let it be and arise and take a stronger, more self-loving hold on your heart and soul. To invite in a reality that is heart-based, that works with the mind and not against it, and with the soul in a more sober way. There is so much still to feel and on the other side of that, so much more to just keep letting in as we continue our paths of deep inner transformation that continuously transform and upgrade our entire world as we kNOW it and rediscover it, today. ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

My Magical Experience Of Sacred Union Through The SoulFullHeart Process

Published on November 4, 2017November 4, 2017 by Jelelle Awen2 Comments

By Jelelle Awen

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This man….this soul choosing to BE in life with me. As partners in this dance of feeling and healing. As co-creators of a vocation that offers a service of love with others that arises as a genuine passion. As journeyers into the depths of ourselves and all the aspects that live inside of us. As co-integrators of shadows that live in our Metasouls and our counterpart pairings in different timelines: Lemuria, Atlantis, ‘ancient Greece’, Arcturian, and more.

This kind of partnership is not what we have been conditioned to believe about relationships in 3D life. 3D offers us not templates of two souls moving into health in ALL areas of their lives individually AND together…yet rather examples of unhealed and congested wounded places inside of each of them that often clash and burn or cling and bind….. until whatever love they had between them runs out of ground.

More scared unions than sacred unions are these, formed from undifferentiated parts of the 3D self ‘hooking up’ with each other. These hookups can look like two Inner Protectors guarding and ‘fighting’ each other; an Inner Matriarch (wounded masculine in the woman) with the Inner Patriarch (wounded masculine in the man); and many others. We need these reflections in others (that includes all relationships actually, with birth family esp.) until we no longer do in the same way.

The TRUE authentic selves, the higher selves coming into body of each partner may not claim much space on the dance floor of the relationship as it is so rarely safe enough INSIDE to allow for this overflow of genuine expression to come out. Lust then supplements for awhile and karma drama from other lifetimes and timelines, all without much consciousness around it. Duty and obligation can come in there too, along with needs to feel safe and secure.

This can be the experience of polarity and push-pull in 4D relationships. There is this sense of soul mating, of soul resonance, of belonging together in 4D consciousness around relationships. There are moments of genuine connection and even grounded bliss. Moments where two hearts can feel each other. Two bodies can connect with each other. And, yet, there is still the unfelt 3D stuff/wounding that anchors each partner into suffering loops and patterns. It anchors them into moments of fusion with 3D parts of themselves again. They go up and down in this unconscious cycle of push-pull together and the ceiling of good will, respect, and mutuality often crashes down around them eventually.

With Raphael, over our nine years together, I experience that we can navigate the murkier grounds of reactions and triggers together WHILE maintaining a larger container of love and goodness in the process. We don’t avoid what is in shadow or what is difficult. We don’t float in bliss together at all times (although many times we do, especially when we experience deep heart openings that come from moving through something difficult and come out the other side of it with MORE love.) We have been able to show up in relationship with each other this way because we have shown up for ourselves and parts of us in this way. With curiosity, we hold space for the energies that move through us. We feel them as very distinct and even commonly definable parts of ourselves that we have felt in so many others too.

Raphael and I can sit in conflict and tension together, as we did the other day for almost eight hours. Not to suffer in this space or to ‘beat each other up’ emotionally. Yet, rather, because we honor the energies inside and in our Metasouls that NEED this space to express and be relationally with an intimate other person and soul. The trust and love ground that we have between us and inside of us and in the Divine holds the space. We stay in the room together through it, allowing, and BEing with the fears that can live inside about the relationship completing, running out of ground, etc. Yet, we find the next going on place together and the next….AS we are willing and open to let go EVEN AS we are deeply committed to the union.

This IS possible through the parts work process, through the SoulFullHeart way of life and process that we offer and have been very deeply, personally engaged with for ten years. This understanding and feeling space that we create inside with parts of ourselves allows for the transaction together in an increasingly high frequencies of soul, body, heart, and mind AND integration of shadow too.

Someone commented the other day when I shared a joy moment that came after more Metasoul pairing integration with Raphael, ” I love how you’re really doing this – for real!” Yes, we really are and so can you….starting from inside of you, creating an inner sacred union with ALL aspects of yourself…..and this eventually drawing the your mate of soul, body, heart, and mind to be in it WITH you too!

Raphael’s comment on this post: “The challenge that arose between us a few days ago that Jelelle refers to was for me the most challenging yet, encountering a part of myself that has lived in my shadow…, something I don’t think would arise were it not for an intimacy as deep and ‘strange’ as ours. I say strange because the intimacy and magic I have and do experience with Jelelle still feels incomparable to a part of me, incomparable to anything I’ve seen or known or saw portrayed. I’ve tended to feel that strange magic in very private places, feeling also the vulnerability of it ending.

Now the universe is inviting us to self permit ourselves to offer to serve others in leading with what we have in deep transparency, feeling how opaque leaders and murky spiritual offerings are a thing of the past for so many souls now.

And….I’m feeling a ton of relief to be coming out the other side of an intense integration, or to the beginning of an integration in another way…

We are all being invited to a place where our life’s message is ‘I am the real thing, and if I ever feel less than that, I’ll be the first to admit that’.”

We offer a FREE 30 minute introductory session with us to get a sense for how the SoulFullHeart process could apply to you, your life, your desires, your frustrations, the parts inside that want and need you:soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

This photo was taken during an energy session with Raphael where I acted as midwife in moments, teacher in moments, student in moments, lover in moments, friend in moments….such is the multidimensional way we are with each other..

Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Sacred Feminine and Sacred Union Facilitator, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond.

Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, videos, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Loving And Healing Your Invulnerability: The Gateway To Your Sacred Humanity

Published on November 2, 2017 by Gabriel Heartman2 Comments

To a part of us, Love is scary as Hell. Our invulnerability, our protection from totally feeling what is churning inside of us, is the expression of that part. Or in-expression as the case may be. This feels especially true for men, yet women have their own version of it too. It can also come out in expressed rage, as there is something so very vulnerable underneath it…a deep feeling of hurt and rejection. Our outer defenses are both guarding something precious as well as preventing something precious at the very same time. It is Love seeking Itself inside of you.

What is scary is letting the guard down and exposing what has been hidden. It is the exposure of the hurt, the fear, the guilt, and the truth in all its edges and judgment. It is the fear of seeing something that feels “ugly”, which is only a judgement we carry in ourselves. It is the very real possibility that life will forever be changed and made unknown. The guard keeps the safe intact, while Hell itself reigns supreme inside the fortress walls.

There are aspects of us that have not seen the light of our own consciousness until we begin the deep work of inner healing. It is a journey into lands that are filled with creatures both of light and of dark. The shadow is a storage warehouse of sorts. An invisible doorway until we trip on the wire that is hooked up to it by our own experience. It holds all things unsightly and extremely sacred to us. All of our greatest power and potential resides in these lands for us to reclaim when we have decided the time is Now. Until then, the universe, in concert with our Higher Self, continues to send us what we need to continue this dance with Love, whether in resistance or unison.

As Gaia edges her way “forward” in her ascension and union with Love, we too experience the Light knocking at the door of our most guarded self. The guardian at the gates may feel an attack is brewing and will double down on protection by any means. Or it may just decide that it is done with the gig and look for help in the solace of your sacred human heart. We are key-holders, yet we must negotiate with our protector as we need their help in the reintegration of all that has been locked away.

Going IN, is ultimately the only way to go UP. Without fully seeing and feeling what is hidden will we ever truly feel what it means to be seen. To be altered and transmuted by Love. This is the ultimate invitation of sacred romance and intimacy. You can only go so far on your own as you need an other, in the deepest and scariest waters, to see what you couldn’t or weren’t willing to see or feel. Ascension is stillborn outside the gates of our shadow. Being vulnerable with your invulnerability is what takes you to the burning grounds of all that is not in your highest being.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

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Letting Go WITH Love

Published on November 1, 2017November 21, 2017 by Kasha Rosa2 Comments

by Kalayna Colibri

Letting go WITH love… this phrase is becoming more poignant now, bringing with it deeper meanings. We are being invited to really feel it. It can no longer mean letting go and closing a door for good or with numbness. This is being challenged by so many disasters and tragedies, all intended to evoke, not dampen or inspire numbness and escape. A broken wall becomes a doorway into another reality, another timeline. It is happening with our need to feel more now, to be faced with our shadows, to go INto it all, as it flows through and moves us too. No process is without fluidity. It is all a moving current, moving with what you are currently feeling, being and healing.

There is less and less stagnancy possible now. All is moving, even the ‘stuckness’ feelings and patterns. As you are invited to let go, you are invited to do so with love, with a full heart, and with deep care that begins from you to you. There are some things that cannot be let go of right now. Not while parts of you need them still. This is okay. They won’t need them forever. Eventually, these ‘needs’ which can look and feel like addictions, move too as you go inward, holding mourning processes with parts of you while also letting in that this ‘need’ was never all that loving towards you or them in the first place. This can be a romantic relationship, your relationship to your pet, a friend or birth family member. It can be a drug, prescription or not. It can be sex or shopping. It can be a part’s escape through your mobile phone or computer or gaming system. It can be and often is food too. There are so many ways that loops of ‘I want love, but I’m settling for this pattern and stuckness instead’ can express. These too want to be felt and moved WITH love… let go of with love. But only if there is love powerfully present in your heart and in your life, can this become possible for you.

Letting go becomes a practice of being… holding an open hand and open heart, feeling ‘attachments’ where your heart and parts have been invested, holding it all as good, letting in the space for the tears of mourning and eventually the tears of joy. Both sometimes happen at once, as timelines emerge and collapse and emerge again.

Letting go becomes an experience of the heart… feeling the fullness of feeling all there is to feel. Baking in the goodness and the sadness, giving all relationships their due. This is hard, especially for your Inner Protector, as he/she would prefer to just ‘move on’ and suppress the lessons, the mirrors, the love that wants to come to you through these emotional landscapes within, that when taken in deeply could transform your life and end suffering loops too. Your Inner Protector can be felt in this desire to numb out instead of feel and share with you why it has been this way and why allowing you to feel on your way out the door has been scary. Outrage is far easier to lean into at times, wanting to blame many or even just a few… or yourself too. Yet this is numbing somehow too. Numbing to the reality of where the experience wants to take you…. the journey and process to self-forgiveness and a greater sense of your love and worth. The journey and process of finding out what’s underneath it all, what led you here, what is underpinning the whole experience.

Letting go WITH love wants to live and breathe in your being. Letting IN with love is the reality at your doorstep. Perhaps eventually it all leads to simply letting love, period – where the comings and goings are not really events anymore, but instead, there is a way to just be and move with it, with fluidity and fluency, stillness and grace. For now, the feeling part is often the hardest…. but the one that will lead you to more of the love flow that so wants to flood your every part and every ache and every single bit of joy too. ❤

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Emotosomatic Healing: The Deep Roots Of Parts Work

Published on October 31, 2017November 3, 2017 by Gabriel Heartman2 Comments

My recent back and neck pain has found a home in my heart. What I mean by that is that through a deep emotional movement and process with my beloved Kalayna, and energy sessions with Jelelle, the intense spasms and stiffness got felt in a deeper emotive root. The part of me that was using the pain as a protection and a way to get my attention was able to surrender into vulnerability and trust in the open hearts of both myself and my mate. It was an experience that demonstrated the power of our emotions and intimacy to transmute and heal.

Though the term “psychosomatic” is more commonly used, we feel that it is the emotional body that is ‘upstream’ of the mental body. Our emotions are energy in motion that translate into thoughts that have their own waveform and power. So, yes, what I was thinking was having a huge impact on my body, but what I was thinking was stemming from an emotive ground. So more specifically our physical ailments are “emotosomatic”, as coined by Jelelle. This is an agreeably mental distinction, but it feels important to highlight how physical pain is framed in SoulFullHeart without a claim that we have THE answer. It comes from our experience. One that is very evident to me.

The original source came from waking up one morning, after Kalayna and I had decided to move in together, with slight neck and back pain. This grew in intensity without an experience of an outside event such as a fall. It grew so fast and so intensely that it rendered me on the couch, as even walking in the neighborhood felt painful. Kalayna and I were not able to really be close to each other as the pain found its way between us. While it is easy for our 3D self to take it at face value and just deal with the reality at hand, if we are to truly embody that what we experience IS a creation of our own power and making, then what was the suffering and pain all about? This is the place to go in curiosity and true self-awareness.

A part of me was using the severity of the pain as a way not to really feel the deeper root underneath it all. I found myself fusing to the pain, meaning I wasn’t able to see outside of it. For those that have major chronic pain, it is understandable and I get it. BUT, if we are to truly get through the pain it needs be gotten under. This is where conscious intimacy, especially romantic, can have such a powerful effect. Kalayna, and a part of her, had to be honest with its impact on us and her.

It was hard to feel that, and not feel the impulse to be defensive and resort to a state of powerlessness. In the tears, we felt our romantic past and how a pattern was repeating itself. I could begin to feel the difference between me now and me then and how much I, Gabriel, needed and wanted a sacred union but another part of me was in resistance for various reasons. Using her gift of intuition, she helped me to feel some other dimensional layers that resulted in a vulnerable holding of an aspect of me that has been in isolation for so long. The touch of another brought significant tears that held the energy of trauma and loneliness.

The next day I found myself in a dramatically different physical space and was even to go out to dinner and enjoy some walking around town. Totally unimaginable the day before, as I could barely get off the couch and walk around the apartment. More poignantly, I am feeling this aspect of me in my heart and not in my spine any more. The pain was felt at its root and is now a process in my heart that I can be with consciously. A deepening occurred between Kalayna and myself and we can now start to feel what else is there for us to feel with the pain out of the way. It brought us to a vista of what lies between our hearts and souls to heal.

I felt very inspired to share this personal experience to demonstrate the power of parts work and the nature of pain as based in the emotional body. There is so much to learn about ourselves and what lies in between us and real love. There are souls that have taken on huge physical challenges that are meant for their own growth in ways that can only be illuminated by going into the heart and feeling the hidden pain that lies in the deep emotional and spiritual roots. What is it that your soul is wanting you to finally heal? Ask your pain. Ask for help.

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Halloween Message: Responding With Love, Not Fear, To Your Shadow And Spirits

Published on October 31, 2017October 31, 2017 by Jelelle Awen5 Comments

By Jelelle Awen

darkness

“It is precisely because we resist the darkness in ourselves that we miss the depths of the loveliness, beauty, brilliance, creativity, and joy that lie at our core.” ~ Thomas Moore

Resisting anything in ourselves just leads to more pain, more resistance, more pushing out of life and not letting it in. Resisting the darkness is understandable when we have been taught in 3D culture to fear that which we don’t understand, that which isn’t socially acceptable, that which may hurt or harm others or ourselves. We have been taught to fear our fear and the fear of others as well. This fearing of fear JUST leads to more fear being generated. This creates a fear fueled energy cloud that rumbles inside of us and through all the strands of the collective emotional body web for fear-based BEings to get more energy from.

On this ‘day’ of Samhain’s and All Saint’s Eve, Halloween, Dia de los Muertos, Diwali…..the shadow is actually acknowledged, recognized, and even celebrated within our cultures. The shadow sides can come out in costume; they can put on masks that are actually more REAL to their frequencies. The darkness can roam a bit without fear suppressing it. Souls that have left their human bodies and passed on can be opened up too and be felt by their loved ones without the fear of ghosts or being haunted blocking the connection.

As we BEcome more of our higher self in our human body, gifts of mediumship naturally arise and become less afraid of the spiritual realm. We see, feel, and hear Ethereal BEings such as Angels, spirit guides, spirit animals, and more. We can connect with our passed BEloveds through our common Metasoul threads and heart cords as none of us really cease from being energized in the Now in SOME form. We can connect to other Metasoul partnerings and playouts with these SAME people, yet in different dances. Maybe, someday, we’ll be able to change or alter timelines to prevent dying and live out in Infinite Awareness with no time together IN a human body that will no longer age or get diseases.

With the veils between dimensions becoming so thin already in this now of intense phototonic light activations, it feels like there IS an opportunity to connect with spirits in a much deeper way today. To lead with your heart and your intention and ask to receive communications, being open to these contacts coming in unexpected ways, and trusting that love wants to see this happen for your own healing AND theirs.

There is also more support to being open as well to how your shadow aspects might be needing you, wanting you. Your shadow often contains sources of power, soul gifts, soul purpose clarities…once the fear and resistance frequencies have been felt, cleared and healed, then these powerful soul gifts can be revealed. More of your power can be revealed and, often, more of your vulnerability as well.

All of this discovery may require negotiation with the part of you that protects and guards your shadow, what we call the Inner Protector in our SoulFullHeart process. The Protector (and also the 4D Soul Guardian) may not feel that you are truly ready to connect with your shadow and embody your soul power expression. They are in a stance of keeping you ‘safe’ rather than allowing you to risk feeling something painful and difficult (even though they will often allow and even contribute to repeating suffering loops inside you).

As your higher self comes into your body and your higher heart opens and expands, you become able to bring love to ALL the fear places inside of you. You can then also bring this love to the fear based energies in others and serve as facilitator to this clearing of fear process in them too. This bringing love to fear then reverberates and expands throughout the entire Universe and the collective emotional body too. Bringing light to the darkness is above all about offering energies of compassion, forgiveness, understanding, and willingness to FEEL what is real.

Becoming a ‘warrior’ or going to battle against darkness just perpetrates the cycles of fear meeting and matching with more fear. This is often just the Protector in another form of ‘light warrior’ that is ultimately based in nonvulnerablity and resistance.

Help parts of you to put down the swords, share with you WHY they are holding them, WHY they are afraid to go into the shadows with you, and you’ll open your heart UP even that much wider, able to experience the love that makes up the essence of it ALL, including your shadow!

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