Category: 3D/4D/5D Selves

Practical Ascension: 7 Key Areas Of Life – Financial Area Intro

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Gabriel & Kalayna

In this video, SoulFullHeart Teachers, Facilitators and Sacred Union mates, Gabriel Heartman and Kalayna Colibri, discuss the financial area of life and the different ways in which we relate to it from the perspective of our 3D, 4D, and 5D Selves. There is so much projected onto money by parts of us that relate to it in many different ways, often with a lot of charge, fear-polarization, and unworthiness.

There are many different ways in which this area of life is related to and for each generation, the approach is a bit different. For Kalayna and Gabriel, their processes around money and the financial area of life have been very different yet have had some common threads. They share some pieces of their personal processes in this video, though they will share much more in the next video in this area.

How parts of us feel about and relate to money is also how parts of us feel about and relate to love. If it doesn’t feel as if it is in flow and if it feels like a tighter budget means less happiness, then there is likely an over-attachment to money representing love, self-worth, and overall abundance capacity. There is so much self-punishment in this area and acute unhappiness. To genuinely feel the true abundance of life, which encompasses and flows into all areas including the financial area, is a process of really feeling with parts of you where the focus on “lack” is rooted in your templating from birth family, friends and culture, and overall 3D conditioning. Moving more into 4D can mean more financial “crises” arising, as you choose to transition away from jobs/careers that do not match your emerging sense of soul purpose, or as life presses you into moving away from these jobs, sometimes without the open negotiation between you and your parts happening first. Ascending into more of a 5D consciousness in this area means that you are drawing abundance in all forms and do not feel an over-attachment to money as love or an expression of your self-worth. If you are in 5D consciousness while money is still necessary in your life and where you are living, there is an inherent trust that it will work itself out, that you have everything you need, and that you are willing to be with the parts of you that don’t feel this, that aren’t with you in 5D just yet, recognizing how the dips and valleys and layers of this feeling space are what offer you deeper and deeper healing and a deeper conscious connection to abundance of love at the heart of it, once the other side of the process is reached. Actually, this applies to all areas of life from the 5D Self’s perspective!

If you’re curious to learn more about how we feel about this area of life in SoulFullHeart, there are many writings on our blog: www.soulfullheartblog.com and there are other videos on our YouTube channel where we discuss and digest this topic as well.

If you have any questions or comments, you can leave them in the comment thread here on Youtube or find us on Facebook (just look for Kalayna Colibri and/or Gabriel Heartman and/or SoulFullHeart Way Of Life!). You can also email soulfullhearts@gmail.com.

Donations are so appreciated and received with gratitude as an energy exchange in the offering of this series for free through paypal: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/donations or the SoulFullHeart Patreon Page: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart

More links you may wish to visit for more information on Kalayna, Gabriel and SoulFullHeart:

Blog site:  https://soulfullheartblog.com/

Website:  http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/

Gabriel’s bio:
http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/about-gabriel-heartman

Kalayna’s bio:
http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/aboutkalayna

In Utero: Current Ascension Pangs Of 3D/4D Consciousness

Published on by Gabriel Heartman4 Comments

There is a current we are riding. A trajectory. It has a direct connection to the source of our Being. It is like those geometry proofs we got in high school where you were given the damn answer but you had to work your way there.

“What the hell? If we have the answer what is all the fuss about?” This was a very mental exercise. I feel that same part of us trying to do the same thing with Ascension. It is a mystery. An unknown set of variables that are seeking to be discovered and made known in the puzzle.

But coming from the Heart, Ascension is not a problem to solve. It is something to be embraced, surrendered to, and lived through. It is getting to the core of our fear of the unknown, unknowable, and forgotten. It is coming to terms with what you truly ARE and walking that out in real time with the courage of your compassionate conviction.

We are truly being transformed in ways that our minds and our 3D reasoning/conditioning cannot understand in the old way. You are being invited to ask questions of the current state of ALL areas of your life.

How do your relationships serve your growth and intuition?
How does your livelihood or lack/abundance of financial consistency serve your highest timeline?
If you have a difficult physical condition, what is that trying to offer you in seeking a deeper understanding of the energy underneath it?
If you experience timeline bleed-throughs and/or fluxes in energy, what are they offering you in the way you relate to them?

The fog of our collective amnesia continues to lift the more that others seek these answers and align themselves with the greatest service of Love. Our Star Being ancestry is coming into full view through Disclosure and our own personal remembrance timelines. I feel we are collectively ‘in utero’ even as some are becoming born into their purpose and galactic awareness. Even these birthings are up for rebirthing as there is no real end to the growth of our infincy (infinite infancy).

What many are experiencing are birth pangs. Energy shifts and external circumstances that are meant to make our internal nest a bit uncomfortable and unbearable at times. Your external circumstances and the way parts of you relate to them, usually through reasonable fear, are up for reevaluation. They are midwifed into a new felt reality of your Glory as a sacred human star being. This midwifery is held process that is held in negotiation with the protective layer within, we call your Protector. They hold the key to deep embracing and embodiment of this New Earth/ Service of Love/ Galactic You.

Whew! That is a big ol’ Soul Sub we are trying to integrate into our BEing! It is about feeling all that we need to feel, as wonderful and as difficult as they are. There is a soft determination that is being asked of you as well as a sense of playful seriousness. You are ready to make the next steps. The support is here. The energies are paving the way. It is your time….to be born again.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Day 3 ~ Journal To The Demiurge

Published on by Raphael Awen1 Comment

Journal To The Demiurge with Raphael Awen Day 3

By Raphael Awen

(This is Day 3 of an ongoing series, to begin at day 1, go here: https://goo.gl/CgrWXZ)

Raphael: Good Morning team. Pardon me, I realized that I’m the only one on the team that needs to sleep…, well, me and the posse of hearts here too.

Metatron: Sleep is good, Raphael. You feel awake though.

Raphael: I so do. The past few years have felt challenging to parts of me having as much free time as I do, quite an adjustment from the busyness of life that I knew in other settings and times. But this journey before us is rumbling through me with a passion and an excitement. It’s 4:30 in the morning as I sit on the patio in the predawn thumbing away again on this iPad. Thank you for this joint mission.

Metatron: What do you feel about that on a deeper level?

Raphael: hmmm. I’m feeling how all my life, I, or the part of me living my life as me at that time, sought mission and purpose. God forbid, pardon the pun, that I would lead a meaningless life. This part of me, so wanted to escape boredom. I still feel I have aspects of my Metasoul that want to heal and feel that one through my present life story to this day. This was so much a part of the draw to Christianity, getting approval and purpose from thee creator, thee God, with a capital ‘g’, thee God of everything. Where this all lands in me in this moment is that I still feel we play a big role with our intentions and choice points about how we are going to relate to life.

Metatron: What’s your intention for today, for now?

Raphael: I feel, and I like starting my intentional statement with the words, ‘I feel’,… I feel I want to be intentional and conscious of everything I’m feeling as I’m feeling it. Am I feeling everything that’s moving through me and giving love to any place of fear, giving curiosity to any place of tension or hiding? Am I showing up for myself?

Metatron: Wow, there’s a new universe, right there! And certainly doesn’t sound like one ruled by the Demiurge!

Raphael: Yes! I still very much want aliveness, and juice flowing through my veins, but I want a different relationship with all of that inside of me. I get to feel, I like to say.

Metatron: We said we’d like to talk about your Christian journey and the events that led to its demise in you. This feels like a good time to get into that. The journey to the Demiurge will need us all being brought up to speed on some of this for sure.

Raphael: Okay. I get to story tell some. I like that. There are still parts of me that have pieces to feel and heal around all of this and so sharing is an opportunity to feel them, and this journey then gets to re-create the whole deal as well.

As I said, I so wanted purpose and mission. As a teen, I wanted to escape the aimlessness I felt around me and even in my family’s version of ‘Christianity light’, as I saw it at the time. I left the family denomination at 19, where I was already an active youth leader, in one fell swoop, decided to renounce my infant baptism, by choosing adult baptism, joined another non-denominational church and signed up for the full time Bible School they hosted. I had become really drawn to miracles, signs and wonders. I wanted something real, that I could feel. I felt how the longstanding family history in a denomination felt dead to me, culturally stuck, and sooo eternally  and damnably boring. I had sat through 2 church services every Sunday since I was a week or two old, and about the only thing I hated more was the dentist.

I recall as a young boy, around 5 years old, as spring had sprung and the snow had receded in northern British Columbia, the neighborhood boys were rounding up a group to go play baseball. I looked high and low for my treasured ball glove, but couldn’t find it. After I had looked everywhere, it dawned on me that ‘God knew where my ball glove was’. I paused and prayed to God to help me find my glove, then opened my eyes, resumed my search, and boom, there it was. ‘God’ was just a given in my reality.

At 17, I ‘knew I wasn’t living right’, and that ‘I would go to hell if I died’. The pot smoking and wanting to get my hands up a girls shirt were things that had to go. I was also living with a self diagnosis of suffering with a big ‘inferiority complex’ and depression. This was the moment I made my first cult switch, as I dropped my circle of friends overnight, and jumped into my family’s Christianity. I again bargained with God ‘that unless he delivered me from my inferiority complex, I wouldn’t amount to anything’ which is kind of funny now as I feel it. I kind of told God that he needed to cough up or he wasn’t going to get any goods out of me. The crazy thing though was about 3 weeks later, while out driving my dads car, it dawns on me that I had not had any deep depression feelings for that whole time. I sincerely believed that God had answered my desperate prayer and heart cry. My energy field shifted and it wasn’t long and I was President of the youth group at our church, and the inferiority subsided.

Merlin: Wow, Raphael. I think it would have been better had you managed to get your hands up more girls shirts.

Raphael: I know! right? Merlin, thanks for jumping in here. This can all use some breathing. Part of me so was afraid of my sexuality and my desires for mateship as well, that ‘giving it all to God’ felt like ‘the right thing to do’. Again, I pawned off onto God for safekeeping what I was afraid of, just like I was afraid of my inferiority and depression and needed to use God as a way to escape it.

I met a young woman at this time through some church youth volunteer mission work, and we found our way into a romance and I felt like my life went instantly from a 2 to 9.5 on a scale of 10. Sex was being ‘saved for marriage’, and this was any kind of ‘sex’ other than kissing. When she broke up with me 11 months later, I knew it had to do with me wandering from the family faith that we were both deeply a part of, and looking to greener pastures of more exciting forms of Christianity, even the dreaded Charismatic Movement. The day following our break up, my family was away on a weekend camping trip and I sat in the black lazy boy chair in the empty living room with the house to myself, and the well of tears wanted to come, but I was able to hold them, and the depression at bay. I called a friend instead to arrange to go for coffee. Something in me ‘knew that I knew’ not to go to that ocean of tears. I again called on God to deliver me from this pain. I managed to walk away unscathed on the surface. It would be not until 19 years later that I re-encountered my depression, finally able to self lovingly let it arise to the surface to begin feeling it. Wow, talk about an effective suppression strategy, and ‘God’ was at the center of it.

How am I doing Metatron? We felt to go to me sharing about the demise of my Christianity, and I’m taking the long road  to get there…

Metatron: You’re doing perfectly. How are you feeling as you are sharing this?

Raphael: I’m feeling a ton of compassion for the me who managed and lived all of that through, for the reasons I did. I can feel another version of me who could have been able to weep all those tears at that time of the deepest conscious loss of my life; the me who is here now. And that feels good.

Metatron: Your sharing feels good too. Please…

Raphael: So, then is about when I was preparing to jump ship again and trade in everything I had for the Charismatic Movement in Christianity. I so wanted to be able to ‘speak in tongues’ as they called it. I felt this was proof of the real power of God. I knew I was ‘saved’, and my fears of hell were well behind me now in the rear view mirror, but I so wanted to feel this miracle kind of experience. It was a bit of a long journey finally arriving at the moment where in response to a church altar call, I was essentially coached into being able to access prayer language, but what a glorious moment it was feeling this miracle of prayer language flow through me in all kinds of dialects and intonations that I could play with at will. I went home that night and prayed for another hour. I knew I was at a turning point.

After a few more months of logistics and gathering the courage, I knew it would have to be a tear-the-bandaid-off kind of approach. My father had said a few months prior that if I left the church, or got adult baptized, I’d have to move out of the house. I sat him down one evening and told him in one breath and one non-stop sentence, that I was leaving the church, resigning from my youth group presidency, joining the Charismatic Church I’d been visiting, attending their full time Bible School in the fall as well as getting adult baptized. He said nothing, looked away and asked my mom for an aspirin as his headache had flared up just then. He came down to my room later that evening and told me, quite surprisingly, that he felt that if I felt my Heavenly Father was guiding me, then who was he, as my earthly father to stand in the way.

It’s interesting I’ve managed to connect with my dad, Jim, as a guide, since he passed away close to 10 years ago now. He died a few years after me jumping ship yet again, leaving Christianity, leaving a 23 year marriage, and admitting I no longer held Jesus as my personal savior. My last memory of him in this life was him in a hospital bed looking so weak a few weeks before he died, as I felt my inner boy part of me looking at him in his weakness, recalling his admiration of his dad’s once strong body. My dad garnered his energy to sit up and tell me with his forefinger pecking at the roll-away bedside eating table that ‘God said in his word that we are to honor our father and our mother, and that He ‘instituted’ family.’ We were miles apart and I chose not to go back to sit again in that energy for any more of that disconnect.

I can so feel his new energy now and feel to let him pop in here, as I’ve energized him by speaking about him.

Jim: Thank you Raphael. I love your new name. It so rocks. We gave you the name Marvin, but you chose Raphael. I’m so sorry I fed you the horse shit pile called Christianity that I was fed. I didn’t find the courage to stand up to it like you did. I know we agreed to these roles before acting them out together, but I still feel sadness that you felt pain. That was some tuff shit we agreed to. And I want to say that the Bible is the biggest horse shit pile of them all, some really attractive horse shit mind you, but shit none the less. I don’t feel afraid of God from where I am today, but boy, did I ever in my life with you. I always thought I wasn’t a coward, standing up to bullies, but you are standing up to the biggest bully of them all. I’m so proud of you.

Raphael: There you have it! Thank you Jim. That changes the energy doesn’t it!? Your voice and presence feels so accessible and I’ll count you in as another guide on this journey. Big horse shit piles! Wow. Part of me is remembering all that doctrine just now about omnipresence, omnipotence, and a few other omni’s, like omniscience.

Merlin: Sounds to me like Jim got over his God-fearing ways, and I say we sniff out the same horse shit. If God had to prattle on about his Omni this and Omni that, it sounds to me like he never had it to begin with. We gave that to him as a sacrifice of our own divinity, borne out our insecurity and unfelt wounds. We’ve been eating horseshit ever since and calling it dinner. Fucking no more!!

Raphael: Okay, and now a swearing Merlin on our hands. You usually come off so wise sounding and even-tempered Merlin…

Merlin: There’s some things that really need some fire,… earth, wind and fire, yes and Amen, if that sounds any better…

Raphael: It’s all perfect, and I need to pause for today and pick this up right where we’re leaving off if I may. I feel juiced about the opportunity to share more of my story and feel your digestions of it as we go. Metatron?…

Metatron:  I’ll need the day to take in Jim and Merlin, ‘fucking no more!’ I love it. Where did we ever this morality horseshit about what’s right, wrong, and proper, instead of feeling what we feel. So yes, I’m good and I’ll be ready when you are.

Raphael: Thanks everyone, and a big salute again to the growing posse of hearts joining this journal and journey. Same time, same channel, manana.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about Weekly Sessions, Live Streams, Videos, and Community.

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Ascension Love Energies Invite Healing Of Contention In Our Parts And Metasoul Aspects

Published on by Kasha Rosa3 Comments

by Kalayna Colibri

The illuminating LOVE waves cascading over us now and always, are shedding light on the knotted places inside. The places that, when touched, send ripples of what have become knee-jerk triggers flowing through our hearts and bodies. Feelings of defeat or a need or contend, feelings of loss or a need to over-compensate for what has been lost, feelings of needing and wanting to “fight” – for revenge, for retribution, in defense, in anxiety – ultimately, out of fear on some level. Contention and the temptation towards it that parts of us and Metasoul Aspects have is the BIG one, it feels like. It has been the main default for when we feel reactions. It’s either time to go to war, or it’s time to hide. And the middle ground doesn’t often get navigated, for even to claim to be a ‘light” or “love warrior” still throws down the gauntlet and invites a battle of some kind.

Love, because it is SO powerful when it’s in its purest, most real form, has the power to elucidate this reactivity and does draw out the desires in parts and Metasoul Aspects to fight in some way, often against it actually, because genuine love is a challenging energy to let in and presses on all of the unworthiness within us. Sometimes we need to walk this out and obviously as a species, human beings have been attached to this sort of play out in conflictual situations for a long time now. We cannot fault or blame the parts of us or others who have embodied this, as we’ve all co-created it in so many layers and sometimes even in subtle ways, and, these parts have NEEDED these energies. Especially in the harsh reality of 3D where there is competition, abuse and violence on MANY levels, socio-pathic ferocity without consideration of its impact, and misguided use of power, so often rooted in an intense need for more self-worth and love within.

At times, contentious energies seem to pop out of us, sometimes unsolicited, sometimes fully invited. These energies and emotions, like any others that come through us in waves, sometimes need to take the floor. Choosing to make space for this, to own it and feel it and get curious about it too, opens to the door to much, much healing on this ground. To the degree that we have contention still brewing inside of us, quite often from part to part or very much alive in a timeline (or many) of our Metasoul Aspects, we will draw it, even look for it, on the outside.  In this incredibly complicated world that has been so violent and painful at times to face and be part of, reclaiming our power IS to go inward and become the loving parent to parts of us that so need a humble adult heart to lean into. We’ve all felt the distrust that arises and the lostness feelings of needing to claw our way up and out of the wells we’ve found ourselves in. Contention has so often been the only way that parts of us could grab onto to help themselves out of the well, often exacerbating the situation instead of resolving it, especially within where the real contention is and has always been…

With these Ascension love codes helping us feel all of this now, comes an invitation to continue feeling our next places and especially where those more contentious triggers within us are still living. We get to be with these energies as they live inside parts and Metasoul Aspects of us and help them find and feel a NEW way that lives in and from true self-love and an overflow of abundant compassion and love from us to the world and back again. This is the way of drawing the new day of the New Earth into our Now, not as an event to wait for, but a reality that emerges from within and contagiously and courageously flows outward.

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Being With Your Inner Masculine As A Woman

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kalayna Colibri

I wrote a digestion a few days back of the incoming energies really working the wounded masculine – helping us to see it within ourselves, others, the world around us, and in so doing, to help us start to see the emerging Sacred Masculine, which we cannot really start to feel until we can feel what it is NOT first… as always, starting within.

I’ve actually been working with my Inner Masculine for a few years now as part of my process on the SoulFullHeart path. “He” has had many forms – Inner Protector, Gatekeeper (4D protector of your soul, especially your Metasoul Aspects), Inner Father, Inner Punisher, and all in all, my Inner Mate. all in different waves, layers and expressions, all with different names and frequencies too. Nowadays he goes by the name of “Malcolm” and together we are feeling through what feel like some lingering and perhaps finally completing tendrils and ties to 3D reality, which he has held as so dear for so long, and for many valuable reasons.

As a woman, it feels so incredibly important to acknowledge, deeply feel, and profoundly honour the Inner Masculine within, as they are as much a part of what makes up the remaining patriarchal and wounded masculine frequencies and realities in our current world and widespread reality, both within and outside of us. We have as much responsibility to feel these frequencies within as men do… and this world we are experiencing and wanting to deconstruct in order to rebuild into New Earth, is one we, as parts of us, have co-created.

Today I chose to spend a magical and unfolding afternoon with Malcolm, as it was his wish to do this with me… to have some dedicated “us” time where we can feel each other and feel our relationship start to move into higher vibrations together. He waxed metaphysical as we sat in a local (very Mexican, very sweet!) coffee shop and journaled together. I will share our dialogue together, as it offers you a bridge into being with a part of you, and a way in which to be with your own Inner Masculine (as a man or woman!).

~

Malcolm: I like this place, Kalayna… A/C would be nice, but it’s good…. Coffee is good, new environment is good… can’t get too congested and busy in here because it’s so small, AND they speak English really well! It’s sweet… and it’s nice to not have to hold Spanish with you right now.

Kalayna: Right? And after all that notebook hunting, looking for a small one to fit into a purse, we still ended up with more stuff than will (really) fit in my purse. Hilarious!

M: I know… oh well… I have to get used to letting go of agendas and pictures… or at least any attachment to them.

K: Yes, well, that will come… is here already, actually. You are doing it, little by little.

M: Yes. I’m letting that (and you) in!

I’m sorry I can be such an ass sometimes…
K: It’s OK, Malcolm. That isn’t very common now… you are not an ‘ass’, my friend. You are protective sometimes maybe, but nothing more than that.

M: Thank you… I do feel like I am changing. Sometimes it’s hard to believe how much I can change actually and AM being invited to change, which really in my case means letting go more than anything else.

K: What does ‘letting go’ mean to you?

M: Oof… well, control. Letting go of control or any attempt at it. God, THAT alone causes so much stress, because life IS out of control… YOU are out of control.

K: I am? 🙂

M: Ummmm, well, your growth is, yes! Your destiny is, yes!

K: What do you feel about ‘destiny’, Malcolm?

M: I feel like it is a fixed star always on the horizon. Just, I don’t know, the highest point of your highest timeline… where maybe someone may not get to in one particular timeline, but eventually their soul will get there. OK, I am waxing metaphysical right now!

K: Please go on! I love it!

M: (blushing a little) OK… I will continue.

What if “destiny” isn’t a carrot held by Divine forces, but is instead an inevitability? And what if maybe the destiny, the Grand Destiny, if you will, is really just an ultimate return to love, but with ALL of the growth, changes and trajectories you’ve inhabited left intact. A “return to Source” in a way, but as the mosaic piece you ARE becoming fully carved out and painted in your soul’s unique energies and colours? I get the sense that humans are unique beings because they have and ARE uniqueness… I don’t know. It’s that Conscious Duality piece again, it seems (side note: more on Conscious Duality on our blog, if you’re curious).

K: Yes, wow, that actually opens something up in my heart. Thank you, Malcolm.

M: Yeah… it feels good and purposeful and interesting…. We came from love and unto love we shall return… with significance, not pride or arrogance. Yet significance. And reverence for ALL… wow… Juicy!

K: Sure is! 🙂

M: Thank you for this today, Kalayna.

K: You’re so welcome, Malcolm. More of this to come, sometimes with Gabriel too! 😀 And of course our other beloveds too… with more beloveds to come soon.

M: Yes! I would like that…

K: Me too. 

~

The pictures accompanying this post are from today! Me at the coffee shop (you can sort of see/feel Malcolm in my field), some goodies well-enjoyed, and the beautiful sun codes we took in together too. 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

A Peek Into The SoulFullHeart Process: Gatekeeper Edition

Published on by Raianna Shai2 Comments

By Raianna Shai

I recently felt the desire within myself to write and share more often. I felt into what it is that my heart could offer in order to serve with passion and curiosity and not out of duty or obligation. Then I came to the conclusion that closest to my heart is my personal process. In some moments I feel that I can teach and offer clarities, but what’s most prominent for me in this moment is my parts process. I’m sure there are many who are curious about what the SoulFullHeart process entails, how it is unique to each person, and how it can shift and change your reality, so I wanted to provide some answers for those questions.

I’m not at the very beginning of this process as I’ve been doing about a year and a half of sessions now, but the beautiful thing about it is that we’re kind of all beginners, all the time. Our souls are so vast and deep that it seems would could be discovering more about it for the rest of our lives. But the biggest shifts seem to happen in the beginning, when 3D is being let go of and we begin to know our parts and gain trust with them and the Divine.

I’ve let go of a lot of 3D. Relationships, jobs, certain ways of living. I’m at the point in my process now where I’m breaking more and more into 4D and 5D. Discovering more of my soul and metasoul rather than this-life experiences. The beginning of that journey has been connecting with what we call a Gatekeeper. You can read more about them here and more about 3D/4D/5D here.

My Gatekeeper’s name is Pandora. I connected with her many months ago, thinking of her as a Protector rather than something more multidimensional. Feeling her now, she has revealed herself to be the guardian of my soul – particularly the darker and more somber metasoul timelines.

In my last session, Kalayna and I visited her where she lives etherically. She was open to the visit and showed us the “bunker” that she lived in. It was dark, dreary and had a feeling of deep sadness that made the air seem thicker. To me it felt like a tombstone, full of death and sorrow and pain. She had a separate room for her Pandora’s Box where it felt like she kept my metasoul connections. I felt martyrdom in her – this feeling of protecting me from any shadow in my soul by holding and feeling it all herself. Like jumping on a bomb to save me.

But I didn’t wish her to hold onto that at all! In fact, it kept me from feeling and healing those parts of my soul so that they could transmute into love. But I understood how she couldn’t trust me to be big enough to hold all of that quite yet. I still had some healing to do with my parts and maybe I still have a bit more left. Kalayna asked if there was anywhere else we could take her, somewhere lighter, somewhere she enjoyed and we could breathe.

So we left the bunker and right outside was hill with a giant and ancient tree sitting on top. I felt her familiarity with this tree as a place of sanctuary for when she was feeling more open. I could feel then how much she suffered over her own suffering, which inspired to be the soul big enough to heal this shadow for the both of us.

My Inner Teenager Ariana and Inner Child Raia were waiting excitedly for us at the top of the hill under the great tree. I felt a relief in Pandora after many tears and feeling the joy and purity of Ariana and Raia. She finally allowed herself to be felt and understood, and we finally had the trust between us to support the process with love.

What felt like something so small – just simply listening to and feeling this aspect of myself – opened out a whole new world of potential soul and emotional healing. I can’t give enough testimonials to this work which dives so deeply into YOU like so little else can. There’s so much left for me to feel, heal, discover, and love up so I hope you’ve enjoyed letting this in and my parts and I look forward to sharing more!

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, group calls, videos, community, retreats, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

An Island Unto Yourself: The Loneliness Of 4D Awakening And Ascension

Published on by Gabriel Heartman4 Comments

Ascension and awakening can be a lonely process. Even when surrounded by others there may be a feeling that you are not really there. Not totally present to what is really being said or to the minutia of the day. It can feel like you are in another person’s body, in someone else’s life. All that made sense at one point fails to make much sense anymore. New information, new feelings, new awarenesses are arising. They are coming to the surface by drip or by flood. Though they are not really new….you are just beginning to remember the nature of your BEing.

As you have walked through our conditioned world, the one you subscribed to either fully or partially, you created a world of relationship that matched that conditioning. But as this arising awareness has begun to fill your days there is this visceral chasm that begins to be felt between you and those around you. You may feel like an island unto yourself. This is where you feel the self, or part, that was created to exist in that past environment. Like a special suit that is needed to walk on a distant planet.

This can be hard on the YOU that is in that suit, looking behind those eyes. Feeling behind those words. A tiredness may be coming through. An awareness that you feel like a there is a charade going on. Or you keep bringing your truth only to find it falling short of resonance or curiosity. There is a part of you that may be okay with being introverted. Okay with just being alone. That may be better than all the acting. All the interfacing in a rear view mirror.

It important to feel that this YOU is not alone. There are many that are in similar circumstances and situations. The words may be different but the story is the same. There is a world of resonance INside of you when you find the time and desire to explore. There are a family and community of parts of you awaiting your Higher Heart to come and take them home there. An abundance of resonance that lies in the stars and in the heavens.

There is also family and community HERE. On Gaia. In your frequency. In the State of Authenticity that wants to connect and feel with you. Soul brethren and tribe. While it may be necessary to be alone, with the loneliness, to feel the depths and gifts of it, you are also in need of being seen. Being revered. Being heard. Being challenged to become more and more that which you can feel coursing through your veins. You are never alone in many ways and it can be a hard one for a part of you to truly let in and trust. That is the ground to go into what protects you from diving deeper into that pain and coming out the other side with new vision and new conditions.

This is a reminder from all the guides, ancestors, animal spirits, light beings, and angels that surround us at any given moment. It is also a reminder from one human heart to yours. The journey of awakening is the journey of connecting…one part, one heart, one soul at a time.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Learning To Surf The Equinox New Earth Ascension Energies

Published on by Gabriel HeartmanLeave a comment

Woke up at 1:11 this morning. I felt myself restless. I could feel a part of me wanting to presence itself and another part wanting to just go back to sleep. I get up at 3:30 in the morning to prepare for my online English teaching gig. These are the moments when there are inner conflicts and frustrations. Yet with feeling these divergent parts of me I can take space for them that allows me to honor both and negotiate a bit.

I can feel how these current energies are just that. A current, or flux, of activation. They don’t really take stock of what our 3D conditioning has been. “Don’t you realize I need to be up in two hours?”

“I don’t live in Time. Sorry. Well…not so sorry. Just what IS.”

Just what IS indeed. I did a Practical Ascension video yesterday with my beloved Kalayna and we talked about the mental body and its relationship to ascension. I have been feeling this inside myself along with my inner masculine, both of which are so closely connected. This mental masculine feels a press and a frustration with this ISness. It doesn’t always just “go with the flow”.

By that I mean He doesn’t quite know how to surf these Ascension waves sometimes. When there are things to “do” they can just plain get in the way! But this is what these energies are supposed to help us feel. They are activating something beyond our usual and normal. Turning things downside up and inside out. There is an emotional churning that is invited into a conscious feeling space and it is my responsivity (feels less rigid than “responsibility”) to show up for the popcorning going on inside.

These intense energies are meant to shake something up that is in stasis within us. “Busy-ness as usual” is not the order anymore. It is a time to feel what IS. What is your body needing? What are parts of you feeling even in their polarity…especially in their polarity? What truth is rumbling that needs expression as it is being simultaneously repressed? Ascension energies are not just about feeling good, they are about feeling what is real…and sometimes what is real doesn’t always feel good.

This may be a time of cross grain energetics of 3D, 4D, and 5D. Taking the moment to go in and conduct a heart scan of the emotional and spiritual bodies is the call of the day. The mental masculine is in need of the flowing and circular feminine to help assist in this ongoing Equinox UPshift. Feeling what is occurring beyond the mental veil and in our converging Metasoul timelines can bring more clarity to all that may be rumbling inside. This is done through direct negotiation with what we call the Gatekeeper… the doorman, guard, and guide of the veil.

Learning how to surf may be a precursor to learning how to fly. I feel a gratitude for this at the moment even as the eyes are getting heavy and the alarm goes off in an hour. My parts are feeling okay about it as they felt the context and my heart. I can serve love to young children without feeling frustrated. Now there is a movement that feels significant in its simplicity.

There will be a March Equinox Activation New Earth Unity Meditation with Raphael and Jelelle Awen on March 21st at 2:22pm MT. You can find more info and register at this link:
https://www.facebook.com/events/455929834824560/

Painting by Elena Khomoutova
You may find it here for purchase at https://lightfromart.com/catalog/3

 

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

PRACTICAL ASCENSION: 7 KEY AREAS OF LIFE – MENTAL AREA INTRO

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

In this video, SoulFullHeart Teachers, Facilitators and Sacred Union mates, Gabriel Heartman and Kalayna Colibri, discuss the mental area of life and how we can relate to the mental body from a point of view of love, respect, and spiritual and emotional healing and evolution.

There is so much energy placed on the mind and mental-based reality filtering is lauded and rewarded in our 3D reality, often over any other sort of pursuit or endeavor. Our five senses are the accepted gateway to taking in and understanding our world and the parts of us that make up our 3D Self, including our Inner Protector, Teenager, Mother/Father, and Punisher. As we ascend and awaken into more 4D frequencies and experience of life, sometimes there is a grasping at mental-based spirituality and filtering of spirituality in order to understand what’s happening in the individual and the world too, and why. This can step on the deepening emotional and embodied spiritual experience of awakening and is often a fear-based reaction from parts who are not ready for the awakening or are afraid to let go of 3D reality.

Kalayna and Gabriel also share about the awakening 5D Self, whose reality is more about visceral experience and moving with emotions as they come up rather than rationalizing or filtering them through mental-based conclusions or reasoning. Throughout Ascension, there is more fluidity that is invited, starting within, as the healing and unification of the Self continues and more oneness/non-dual experiences that are well beyond the mind can be had.

They offer too, that the mind is meant to ‘come with us’ during this process of Ascension and not to be left behind as many other spiritual paths offer. It is a crucial aspect of helping us find and visualize what’s possible for us and what our meditation journeys want to offer and show us. Eventually, perhaps the mind as we have known it is not needed anymore, and that alone can leave parts of us feeling anxious about what that reality could mean or be like, especially as the mind and thinking has been so over-emphasized and over-energized in 3D life.

If you have any questions or comments, you can leave them in the comment thread here on the blog, on the Youtube video itself, or find us on Facebook (just look for Kalayna Colibri and/or Gabriel Heartman and/or SoulFullHeart Way Of Life!). You can also email soulfullhearts@gmail.com.

Donations are so appreciated and received with gratitude as an energy exchange in the offering of this series for free through PayPal: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/donations or the SoulFullHeart Patreon Page: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart

 

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Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. 

 Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

 

 

Going Yin: The Healing Gifts of Our Relationship to the Feminine

Published on by Gabriel HeartmanLeave a comment

Today is International Women’s Day. Now, of course, every day is Women’s Day, and vice versa. It is a reverence that just IS. It resonates and harmonizes with the feminine inside the masculine. It is clear that the 3rd-dimensional matrix upon Earth (I use Gaia for its 5D reference) is that of a patriarchal energy. Why else would there be a day to celebrate women? It feels important to let in what the feminine means for all of us men and to feel where our personal shadow may be in relationship to Her.

Since our “fall” from a more balanced union with the feminine there has been a force within the collective wounded masculine that has sought to dominate the feminine in one form or another. It has shown up in personal/social relationships, religious texts or their interpretations, the need to gain control over nature and consume Her resources. In this, I feel a deep fear of separation. The feminine has had a much stronger connection to Source, possibly due to their ability to give birth. It just understands creation and is a vehicle for that in a much more visceral way. I can feel this existential territory the collective masculine has navigated. In this fear of the unknown and unknowable, of which the feminine is so intimate, it seems likely that this need to control would play itself out. It also feels true that the masculine was more influenced by these darker energies and that this “influence” was coded into the DNA/meme of the masculine blueprint. Again, playing here, but something feels true here. The main point to me feels like, as men who have more of the masculine energies in us, that we are a part of that coding and it has had influence.

To truly ascend into what we are calling our Sacred Humanity we must feel any blocks or denser energies that can anchor us into 3D, or wounded densities. Our relationship with women is psychospiritual and has many gifts even in the shadow. By going inward (I call in going “yin”) and feeling the parts of us that hold more “negative” feelings about women, rooted in our relationship to mother and other important influences, we can begin to see what lurks in the background operating system of our projections. Our mothers/female caregivers hold a huge part of that reflection. What was the dynamic between mother and son and how does it play out in our current relationships and perception of the Divine Feminine? I know it is a bit Freudian but it is extremely important. I don’t feel it can be glossed over in regard to ascension.

The era we find ourselves is requiring us to inhabit a more Feminine frequency. We can not control this thing. It is a surrender to Love Spirit that cannot be contained but seeks a container to move with and through. That is tough knuckles for the wounded masculine energy that wants to control and issue its own parameters. I feel it in my being as the days progress. I am still working with it on some level as the Light is shining more on what needs healing. That is why I am being guided write this. But the gift of going in and feeling our relationship the feminine we are given the gifts and guidance needed to make our way into our more natural expression as a Sacred Masculine Human.

We are blessed with the ability to dance in the unknown and the aliveness that that brings to our present experience of life. We are opened in our hearts to let in more of this exquisite love juice that is lapping up on our shores every second of infinity. We are delivered into union with Her impeccable sensuality and sexuality as a portal to the All That Is that careens this magical energy all up and down our chakras. We see with heart eyes with reverence for all of life in all its bountiful and beautiful expressions both of, and outside, this world. There is an unlimited capacity for imagination and creation that sends beyond the machinations of our limited consciousness. She is the Queen of our King.

Gaia is looking for her Kings of Heart to arise out of the necessary ashes of 3D and embody the truly majestic essence of our being. We need to do our due diligence of feeling all there needs to feel in relation to Her and the Feminine. There is a correlate in women as well, but I will leave that to my feminine counterparts for that discussion. I am exploring this with an open heart and I don’t claim to have any definitive truths. I feel the heart says it all and is willing to feel more. Thank you for taking this in today and a special Love shower to all the women, feminine etheric/galactic BEings, Gaia, and Divine Mother on this day. I am in awe and reverence of YOU.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.