Let Your Inner Tension BE Your Path Through 4D Ascension

Painting by Cristina Bernazzani

 

https://youtu.be/QVHY99vTXxc

by Kalayna Colibri

There is no “wrong way”… there is only the way in front of you and inside of you. There is no way or path that is more correct, more aligned with you than what you are currently walking out. The flow you’re already in wants to bring you to your next places of growth and healing, as is inevitable on this Ascension journey where SO much is going on at all times.

It can be especially hard, as you walk out 4D-ascension specifically, to really let this in. To hold that you and parts of you are OK. 4D holds the container for so much churning, so many storms, so much turmoil inside as buried pain surfaces on heart AND soul levels. It isn’t comfortable and it often expresses as messes, conflicts, contention, feelings of being twisted around inside of you into a really uncomfortable pretzel as your Higher Self continues to try and find its way closer to your being. The Higher Self coming into the body causes reactions that aren’t just physical… the emotional reactions, oh, those intense emotional reactions, are all part and parcel of the bigger picture of what needs to be purged, felt, healed. The parts that surface can really inhabit the intensity of this. Parts represent so much of our old ways of being in the world and with ourselves, which is a result of our wounding and conditioning too from culture, birth family, friends, the education system, the medical system, the “Matrix” in general if you want to call it that. The ‘Matrix’ is a charged word and concept for all of the pushing away from it that is happening… it can be held by parts of you as another representation of their pain and anguish, what they want to push away from and forget about. Yet there is still a Matrix within, a very intricately-wired set of responses to life and above all, to love. This is what is being pressed upon the most when we feel this intense birth canal that IS 4D awakening and movement. And of course this is HARD… this is what has been so normalized, so accepted, yet so painful inside of all of us.

In the 4D scramble for answers, it can be understandably hard to find stillness and calm and a place within that is an undying oasis of infinite love… a place that truly believes in and trusts love. This oasis of self-love and worth is worth working for, is worth burning-up from the inside for… and is the passageway to our more consistent 5D moments and eventually whole lifestyle of 5D consciousness and breathing and being. And, though it can be so hard to feel this when the burning and purging is happening, there is SO much love holding it ALL, always and in ALL ways.

For more support and to gather at an oasis of self-love process and experience of infinite unified love with the world, you are welcome to join us at our Unity Meditation gathering happening virtually over Zoom tomorrow and for many other days and times to follow! Please join us and lean into the web of love that has been created and continues to be re-created by each amazing soul that joins in and leans in too. ❤ Go here for more info: www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/events

And, if you want to go deeper, we have 2 process programs that we offer in SoulFullHeart, ranging in price from $33/mo to $222/mo. Check out www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions for more info! ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Ascension Love Energies Invite Healing Of Contention In Our Parts And Metasoul Aspects

by Kalayna Colibri

The illuminating LOVE waves cascading over us now and always, are shedding light on the knotted places inside. The places that, when touched, send ripples of what have become knee-jerk triggers flowing through our hearts and bodies. Feelings of defeat or a need or contend, feelings of loss or a need to over-compensate for what has been lost, feelings of needing and wanting to “fight” – for revenge, for retribution, in defense, in anxiety – ultimately, out of fear on some level. Contention and the temptation towards it that parts of us and Metasoul Aspects have is the BIG one, it feels like. It has been the main default for when we feel reactions. It’s either time to go to war, or it’s time to hide. And the middle ground doesn’t often get navigated, for even to claim to be a ‘light” or “love warrior” still throws down the gauntlet and invites a battle of some kind.

Love, because it is SO powerful when it’s in its purest, most real form, has the power to elucidate this reactivity and does draw out the desires in parts and Metasoul Aspects to fight in some way, often against it actually, because genuine love is a challenging energy to let in and presses on all of the unworthiness within us. Sometimes we need to walk this out and obviously as a species, human beings have been attached to this sort of play out in conflictual situations for a long time now. We cannot fault or blame the parts of us or others who have embodied this, as we’ve all co-created it in so many layers and sometimes even in subtle ways, and, these parts have NEEDED these energies. Especially in the harsh reality of 3D where there is competition, abuse and violence on MANY levels, socio-pathic ferocity without consideration of its impact, and misguided use of power, so often rooted in an intense need for more self-worth and love within.

At times, contentious energies seem to pop out of us, sometimes unsolicited, sometimes fully invited. These energies and emotions, like any others that come through us in waves, sometimes need to take the floor. Choosing to make space for this, to own it and feel it and get curious about it too, opens to the door to much, much healing on this ground. To the degree that we have contention still brewing inside of us, quite often from part to part or very much alive in a timeline (or many) of our Metasoul Aspects, we will draw it, even look for it, on the outside.  In this incredibly complicated world that has been so violent and painful at times to face and be part of, reclaiming our power IS to go inward and become the loving parent to parts of us that so need a humble adult heart to lean into. We’ve all felt the distrust that arises and the lostness feelings of needing to claw our way up and out of the wells we’ve found ourselves in. Contention has so often been the only way that parts of us could grab onto to help themselves out of the well, often exacerbating the situation instead of resolving it, especially within where the real contention is and has always been…

With these Ascension love codes helping us feel all of this now, comes an invitation to continue feeling our next places and especially where those more contentious triggers within us are still living. We get to be with these energies as they live inside parts and Metasoul Aspects of us and help them find and feel a NEW way that lives in and from true self-love and an overflow of abundant compassion and love from us to the world and back again. This is the way of drawing the new day of the New Earth into our Now, not as an event to wait for, but a reality that emerges from within and contagiously and courageously flows outward.

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

March For Our Lives: A Movement Of New Earth Co-Creators And Leaders

by Kalayna Colibri

Saturday… This past Saturday was the day of the March For Our Lives rally. Drawing hundreds of thousands of young men and women, some barely even teenagers, to march, to walk, to stand-up for something NEW. This movement isn’t just about an end to gun violence and a determination to elect an American government that will create stronger gun laws. It’s about something much, much bigger…

This is the generation that is here to end the cycle of violence and co-create a new world, with those of us who are willing to collaborate with them. These are the seeds of the NEW New Earth. The one that guides us even further out of 3D cycles of bloodshed and hate crimes based in power struggles, based in profound inner-wounding and self-hatred, based in collective unworthiness of love. This generation is bringing the love, just as my generation, made-up of many Indigo and Crystal souls, has tried to, yet often still with too much of a “warrior” mindset and heart cry and too much of an outward focus, not really going within.

The hearts of these ones who decided to rally are not unlike those who rallied in the Occupy movement or the Vietnam protests. It’s all based on a desire for change… deep change. The sort of change that doesn’t just happen overnight and indeed needs to come first “from the mouths of babes”, literally. So here it is… their proposal and desire for BIG shifts in our consciousness. Rainbow and Crystal souls, many of them. Ones that actually came here to do this, be this new wave of Sacred Human from their youth on upward. It is as much a press for anyone willing to listen to actually stop for a moment and FEEL… to feel the world, the needs of ourselves, the needs of our parts within that so ache for love and change. That so desire a world that is different, more welcoming, starting within.

I might not be standing with these powerful souls in person, yet I feel my heart and soul supporting them, welcoming them to their missions here on Gaia, joining my tears with theirs for the violence, starting ALWAYS from within, has gone on for so long and now is moving into completion. I feel their souls lighting up at this opportunity to move into being a part of a world that they feel empowered to co-create and co-lead, too. And it won’t matter really who is “in office” so much as how they are continuing to feel, inhabit and live from their own hearts. ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

 

Being With Your Inner Masculine As A Woman

by Kalayna Colibri

I wrote a digestion a few days back of the incoming energies really working the wounded masculine – helping us to see it within ourselves, others, the world around us, and in so doing, to help us start to see the emerging Sacred Masculine, which we cannot really start to feel until we can feel what it is NOT first… as always, starting within.

I’ve actually been working with my Inner Masculine for a few years now as part of my process on the SoulFullHeart path. “He” has had many forms – Inner Protector, Gatekeeper (4D protector of your soul, especially your Metasoul Aspects), Inner Father, Inner Punisher, and all in all, my Inner Mate. all in different waves, layers and expressions, all with different names and frequencies too. Nowadays he goes by the name of “Malcolm” and together we are feeling through what feel like some lingering and perhaps finally completing tendrils and ties to 3D reality, which he has held as so dear for so long, and for many valuable reasons.

As a woman, it feels so incredibly important to acknowledge, deeply feel, and profoundly honour the Inner Masculine within, as they are as much a part of what makes up the remaining patriarchal and wounded masculine frequencies and realities in our current world and widespread reality, both within and outside of us. We have as much responsibility to feel these frequencies within as men do… and this world we are experiencing and wanting to deconstruct in order to rebuild into New Earth, is one we, as parts of us, have co-created.

Today I chose to spend a magical and unfolding afternoon with Malcolm, as it was his wish to do this with me… to have some dedicated “us” time where we can feel each other and feel our relationship start to move into higher vibrations together. He waxed metaphysical as we sat in a local (very Mexican, very sweet!) coffee shop and journaled together. I will share our dialogue together, as it offers you a bridge into being with a part of you, and a way in which to be with your own Inner Masculine (as a man or woman!).

~

Malcolm: I like this place, Kalayna… A/C would be nice, but it’s good…. Coffee is good, new environment is good… can’t get too congested and busy in here because it’s so small, AND they speak English really well! It’s sweet… and it’s nice to not have to hold Spanish with you right now.

Kalayna: Right? And after all that notebook hunting, looking for a small one to fit into a purse, we still ended up with more stuff than will (really) fit in my purse. Hilarious!

M: I know… oh well… I have to get used to letting go of agendas and pictures… or at least any attachment to them.

K: Yes, well, that will come… is here already, actually. You are doing it, little by little.

M: Yes. I’m letting that (and you) in!

I’m sorry I can be such an ass sometimes…
K: It’s OK, Malcolm. That isn’t very common now… you are not an ‘ass’, my friend. You are protective sometimes maybe, but nothing more than that.

M: Thank you… I do feel like I am changing. Sometimes it’s hard to believe how much I can change actually and AM being invited to change, which really in my case means letting go more than anything else.

K: What does ‘letting go’ mean to you?

M: Oof… well, control. Letting go of control or any attempt at it. God, THAT alone causes so much stress, because life IS out of control… YOU are out of control.

K: I am? 🙂

M: Ummmm, well, your growth is, yes! Your destiny is, yes!

K: What do you feel about ‘destiny’, Malcolm?

M: I feel like it is a fixed star always on the horizon. Just, I don’t know, the highest point of your highest timeline… where maybe someone may not get to in one particular timeline, but eventually their soul will get there. OK, I am waxing metaphysical right now!

K: Please go on! I love it!

M: (blushing a little) OK… I will continue.

What if “destiny” isn’t a carrot held by Divine forces, but is instead an inevitability? And what if maybe the destiny, the Grand Destiny, if you will, is really just an ultimate return to love, but with ALL of the growth, changes and trajectories you’ve inhabited left intact. A “return to Source” in a way, but as the mosaic piece you ARE becoming fully carved out and painted in your soul’s unique energies and colours? I get the sense that humans are unique beings because they have and ARE uniqueness… I don’t know. It’s that Conscious Duality piece again, it seems (side note: more on Conscious Duality on our blog, if you’re curious).

K: Yes, wow, that actually opens something up in my heart. Thank you, Malcolm.

M: Yeah… it feels good and purposeful and interesting…. We came from love and unto love we shall return… with significance, not pride or arrogance. Yet significance. And reverence for ALL… wow… Juicy!

K: Sure is! 🙂

M: Thank you for this today, Kalayna.

K: You’re so welcome, Malcolm. More of this to come, sometimes with Gabriel too! 😀 And of course our other beloveds too… with more beloveds to come soon.

M: Yes! I would like that…

K: Me too. 

~

The pictures accompanying this post are from today! Me at the coffee shop (you can sort of see/feel Malcolm in my field), some goodies well-enjoyed, and the beautiful sun codes we took in together too. 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Love Of MU Is Within YOU: A Poem

Painting: Lemurian Dreams by Tania Marie

It definitely feels like Lemurian energies are here strongly at this time… to support and offer guidance too during this phase of March Equinox energies that promise to last all month, or pretty much. I have recently felt my Lemurian Metasoul Aspect emerge, appropriately for them, during love-making with my beloved, Gabriel. Their sensuality and sexuality is passionate and deeply loving as well as devotional. There is a maturity they possess that is unique to anything I have felt in a Metasoul Aspect before. I am just getting to know my own aspect, who calls herself Misheeki. She offers frequencies of Divine Feminine, sunshine-love, and tropical springtime air. She has raw, tribal energy, coupled with ageless wisdom and depth. I am still trying to work out what her wounding is or could be, honestly, though I’m sure there is some pain, somewhere, though unlike my other Metasoul Aspects I have met and felt so far.

If you’re new to the concept of the Metasoul and Metasoul Aspects, you can read this for more info: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts

The following poem I just wrote with Misheeki. It was actually quite challenging to let words come in with the energies she was imbibing (doesn’t help that they love speaking Light Language and not English!), yet hopefully, there is some bridge here that you can walk on to help you feel your own Lemurian aspect if the connection time is ripe. And if it isn’t time to connect with them, then perhaps there is no better time to connect deeper with parts of you that need you right now, while so much is being pressed on, pushed up, activated and upgraded. ❤

~

by Misheeki (Lemurian Aspect of Kalayna Colibri)

Arising…

the sun of the Self is arising.

Loving.

Feeling.

It is a time of great rebirth into a new dawn of a lighted day,

sung like a beacon

to the ethers of All.

 

Hum, dum, drum, dum…

The singing of the call surrounds the heart

of the beast that sheds its skin

for the nakedness of New Earth birth.

For naked shall All be

in all the glory

of a babe in the arms of the loved-up ones…

 

Bringing in the vastness

of YOU…

the bigness of the soul that bears the light

the sound

of a call to the heart

and the bridges built by ropes of wound-up dreamings.

 

So many… so many awakening

So many calling

So many learning, unlearning…

leaning, not collapsing…

The Divine of Love wants

needs

the Divine of All

to remember…

thrum, dum, drum, dum…

to remember the pulse-beat of Its hero’s heart

courageous and moving

feeling and seeking.

 

To feel in this light

is to move mountains inside.

To fear the mountains

is to avoid the climb.

To climb the mountains

is to honour their creation

as essential parts

of a freshly re-unified whole.

 

Know that Mother MU is with you…

during these times of transition and transformation.

Feel that She is not a place

yet a space inside of your being, heart and soul-scape.

Breathe, beloved…

She is with you,

now and always,

and Her Sun is yet still Hers

Though the light is offered through His frequencies

for the up and in and out

of every single spark of NEW, here

and NEW still to come…

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

PRACTICAL ASCENSION: 7 KEY AREAS OF LIFE – MENTAL AREA INTRO

https://youtu.be/ZZRcgURtQJg

In this video, SoulFullHeart Teachers, Facilitators and Sacred Union mates, Gabriel Heartman and Kalayna Colibri, discuss the mental area of life and how we can relate to the mental body from a point of view of love, respect, and spiritual and emotional healing and evolution.

There is so much energy placed on the mind and mental-based reality filtering is lauded and rewarded in our 3D reality, often over any other sort of pursuit or endeavor. Our five senses are the accepted gateway to taking in and understanding our world and the parts of us that make up our 3D Self, including our Inner Protector, Teenager, Mother/Father, and Punisher. As we ascend and awaken into more 4D frequencies and experience of life, sometimes there is a grasping at mental-based spirituality and filtering of spirituality in order to understand what’s happening in the individual and the world too, and why. This can step on the deepening emotional and embodied spiritual experience of awakening and is often a fear-based reaction from parts who are not ready for the awakening or are afraid to let go of 3D reality.

Kalayna and Gabriel also share about the awakening 5D Self, whose reality is more about visceral experience and moving with emotions as they come up rather than rationalizing or filtering them through mental-based conclusions or reasoning. Throughout Ascension, there is more fluidity that is invited, starting within, as the healing and unification of the Self continues and more oneness/non-dual experiences that are well beyond the mind can be had.

They offer too, that the mind is meant to ‘come with us’ during this process of Ascension and not to be left behind as many other spiritual paths offer. It is a crucial aspect of helping us find and visualize what’s possible for us and what our meditation journeys want to offer and show us. Eventually, perhaps the mind as we have known it is not needed anymore, and that alone can leave parts of us feeling anxious about what that reality could mean or be like, especially as the mind and thinking has been so over-emphasized and over-energized in 3D life.

If you have any questions or comments, you can leave them in the comment thread here on the blog, on the Youtube video itself, or find us on Facebook (just look for Kalayna Colibri and/or Gabriel Heartman and/or SoulFullHeart Way Of Life!). You can also email soulfullhearts@gmail.com.

Donations are so appreciated and received with gratitude as an energy exchange in the offering of this series for free through PayPal: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/donations or the SoulFullHeart Patreon Page: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart

 

~

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. 

 Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

 

 

Healing Extremes Of 3D Emotional Conditioning As Human BEings

by Kalayna Colibri

The 3D, transitioning and UPgrading consciousness of so many humans, seems to become so immersed in extremes. Extremes are sometimes the only way to either deeply feel, often to the point of suffering and not feeling anything beyond suffering is possible, or to absolutely NOT feel altogether. Every individual journey is unique, yet many seem to either choose numbness or intense, overwhelming swims inside of their reactions, without a bigger them there to help find their way to healing shorelines. This is what parts of you can choose… and it is all based on what they are willing to feel or not feel, what is actually safe for them to feel or not feel in their current living/work/relationship situation, and if they are ready to come to true healing and the end of suffering without transcendence being used to avoid all pain in general.

We see and witness this dance of extremes and polarities in so many ways. We see it in race/ethnicity wars, in partisan government division, in our cities where there are rich and poor neighborhoods without much in-between, in protests vs quietness… we see evidence of a highly conflictual world, run by so many Inner Punishers and perpetuated by them too. We feel our Inner Protectors trying to simultaneously keep us out of harm’s way and sometimes make the harm worse or more intense too. An example of this would be whether or not you choose to remain in an abusive relationship – with friends, birth family, supposed soul family and/or gurus, or romantic partners. The self-abuse reigns supreme in these scenarios and is being reflected by these relationships, yet this often cannot be seen or noticed because it has become so normalized. All of these exchanges of us vs. them or them vs. us starts within. Parts feel in often very polarizing ways and other parts have learned ways to cope with this instead of begin to let in that another reality is possible where healing and transformation can actually happen and extremes are no longer needed.

What would or could it look like to find the true ‘middle way’ in your life and in your heart? What would it feel like, BE like, to have a life where you have ample self-permission to feel all there is to feel inside of you while living a life that draws real love to you and lights up from inside of you so many more moments of profound joy and bliss and spiritual awakenings? What would it look like to not be OK with flatness, to not let depression or anxiety become your main identifiers and to instead hold the desire to move through all of this and heal, choosing to not remain there because it just is ‘what has been’ for so long? What if extremes of feeling are an invitation for you to find more curiosity about yourself, your parts, your ways of being in life up ’til now that have so impacted who you are and in turn, how you impact the world around you?

When we see these polarizations, these intense emotional landscapes being reflected is so much of our shifting, changing, clanging, banging, yet powerfully-evolving world of human consciousness here on Gaia, we are being shown what has been true and very, very real, and what is finding its way to a higher place of being, seeing, feeling. We are being shown what still needs and wants to be owned in our shadows, in our mutual agreements within ourselves and with each other, both conscious and unconscious. We are reminded that we are learning and that this stage of learning is intense sometimes, yet necessary, as so much is being reset in our relationships to ourselves, each other, and to Gaia and all of Her creatures and geographies.

We are always being invited into a deeper resonance within, where we resonate with parts of us and help them see a new way that is held with love, not punishment, and where we can start to come between the extremes of reactions or non-reactions with a loving curiosity and desire to continue healing. Love is the conductor now of all of our inner healing. True compassion is then birthed from this love and our capacities to help others heal, along with ourselves, are awakened and deepened. Kindness and gentleness towards ourselves and others too can begin to genuinely arise from this work within, and no other way to be in life is desired. All of this, every single step, helps to ease the extremes we experience and bring around more of a life that feels alive, manageable, passionately compassionate, and above all, loving in the truest sense. ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

More Questions Than Answers: The Sacred And Necessary Journey Through 4D Into 5D Consciousness

Painting: ‘Unknown Terrain’ by Andrew Hem

by Kalayna Colibri

As we continue to move through 4D and find our way into 5D reality here on Gaia, there are so many more questions than answers, and there is a knowingness inside that hindsight truly is 20/20… meaning, sometimes we don’t and can’t know exactly what’s going on or where we’re heading until we’ve gotten there. There is a surmounting, ever-unfolding journey we are undertaking, fraught with mystery and entwined with conundrums. You find and claim one answer after another, only to ’round another corner and find another existential crisis awaits…

This is the experience of parts of us on this Ascension path. This is the experience within our Metasoul too and perhaps especially since there is so much karma held there, so many stories of other timelines and even galaxies and the happenings there. What is felt and experienced to be ‘the truth’ in one moment is then negated the next because of new discoveries within and in the world at large, too. There is so much mystery in this process of moving and ascending UPward, so much we cannot understand with our limited human energetic and verbal vocabulary, as it is right now. No wonder so many attempt to ‘figure out’ answers based in what their minds can learn. The heart though, the sacred, awakening and arising human heart, which is at the epicenter of our Ascension as a species, cannot learn through books and teachings alone and needs to experience… needs to feel… needs to let in and let go, too. So many answers are being revealed, starting from the inside, yet they need to be encouraged and supported from outside sources as well. Others who are walking this path alongside you. This is not meant to be an entirely lone wolf-based phase, this time of our Ascension. We are meant to do this together, be this together, find and feel the answers together, even if/when there is contention along the way, often held by parts or Metasoul Aspects of us not ready to let go into their truest vulnerability yet.

There is so much to learn. And are parts of us OK with not knowing our way through to this learning? This has been tricky to feel in this still predominantly patriarchal-based world and dimension, as the mind has been a prized possession and trophy, a sign of worth and power, for men and women alike. Over-reasoning has led parts of us down paths of deep hatred and fear, or a complete bypassing of much emotion at all. And then sometimes the mind gets a bad rap altogether, instead of being loved UP like any other part of our being and brought into our Ascension picture along with us. The mind is still needed, just perhaps not so relied upon, as its scope of the truthiest truths is limited at best.

The truth of Ascension lives at a personal level. It starts there like a seed, only to germinate with the right about of air, space, love. It grows with the questions, the navigation of choppy lower-4D waters, into the upper-4D flowing seas. It sways in the winds of new directions to go in, new places and parts to feel within, new physical geographies to inhabit. It is forever shifting, just as we are and are meant to. How we enter these phases of deep questioning and discernment is a show of active choice points and a foray into the unknown wilds of our human hearts which are at the core of our deepest healing processes and enlightenment/enHEARTenment opportunities.

And so, onward and UPward we continue, with all of our questions still burning brightly in the headlights and fuel tanks of our personal Merkabahs, somehow shining the way  and moving us along still, even if we can’t ever be totally sure where we are going… though it seems too, that as we inhabit even these difficult states of 4D-being and the reality of this for parts of us and move into 5D more and more, the questions become less important than the pure remembering that in the end, the details and ‘answers’ to our questions and quandaries matter far less than the return to our pure and deep understanding and kNOWingness, that we are now and will always ever be LOVE embodied in Sacred Human form. And reaching this state (even if it only lasts for moments at a time at first!) makes all of the journeying, all of the prior perplexed-ness so completely worth it. ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Re-Discovering And Loving The Buried Parts Within

by Kalayna Colibri

Many years ago… I could not have told you that ‘becoming more feminine’ was my goal or intention. I grew up with an older sister who rebelled against femininity and wanted to be like her. I wanted to be friends with the guys that weren’t attracted to me, so at least I could have some way to be close to them regardless, to experience a connection with the opposite gender. I say ‘I’ here because before I was aware that I had ‘parts’ of me running the show of my life, ‘I’ was all ‘I’ had as a reference point for the dramas and desires and pain.

When I was very little, however, I wanted only to wear dresses. I liked big frilly ones with flowers. I liked my pretty shoes and white tights. I especially loved going to ballet class as a 5-year-old and being able to wear the pink skirt that represented my level over top of my leotard. I loved being called a ‘lady’ and would have fantasies about being in ‘princess training’. This was all before messaging of ‘being a girl means you’re weak’ or ‘incapable’ started to leak in and take over. This was before parts of me started to form as a casing, an ever-hardening shell over my natural sensitivity and blooming pre-womanhood. The dresses got put away. The tights could no longer be worn without holes being made in them almost immediately – a symbol, I’m realizing, of my young torn-ness between gender expressions. Skirts didn’t fit or feel right either, and I felt very self-conscious in them. Something was shifting out of wanting to be a girl to wanting to be related to, to be made friends with, to be able to somehow find comfortability in any social situation even if that meant being more like a ‘boy’ in some ways. I stopped feeling ‘pretty’ when I was quite young and thus I stopped trying to be, at least until high school.

I remember all of this in this very moment, especially as I feel a part of me that is my Inner Masculine. I feel how this is a story from him about how he came to be and how he began to form as an Inner Patriarch, coaching and teaching my other parts how to become more masculine in order to survive if not thrive in this world of 3D. I feel the tears of my suppressed, albeit quite young aspect of my Inner Feminine, who it feels like has some pain coming up in response to this… these feelings of being ‘girly’, which was more in my true nature, being deemed ‘not good enough’ so early in my life.

I share this story today because it feels like the story that belongs to so many of us… a story of genuine self-expression, of authentic sensitivity. Unless and until we can begin to feel the parts of us that have (had to) come up in response to life and more often than not, bury or try to dismiss what is actually TRUE about us, it doesn’t really feel possible to feel the layers here and to get to exactly what has been buried for so many ‘years’.

I feel like this extends far beyond authentic gender expression, so much as just what is authentically in our hearts. I feel the richness of a genuine experience of what the sacred masculine and feminine ARE, that can only really be experienced from within, not from other people’s ideas of what it is or is not… in either case when it comes to the masculine and the feminine, we are having to re-learn so much and deeply feel much more.

We have the courage to venture deeper into our own healing, ever-discovering more and more of what has been suppressed within our most inner caverns of what has always wanted to show us the most authentic us we have been waiting and working to BE… and it’s up to us when and if we are ready to lead him/her/them out of the shadows and into the light where they can breathe and play and be themselves again… and this time, without anyone telling them they have to stop being who and what they truly are. ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Information Is An Invitation

by Kalayna Colibri

We are always downloading, integrating, feeling through information coming in, data parts of us area seeking, answers to questions that may or may not be the ‘right’ ones, but are answers for now, at any rate. Parts of us and Metasoul Aspects too, are searching and finding, seeking and hiding. We are feeling this in every moment as we move through life, embody our Ascension, and heal our way to a higher vibrational way of BEing in life (and in LOVE).

What we read, hear, digest, can only ever be an invitation. The mind looks for doorways and the soul seeks out the paths, sometimes even those that aren’t well-worn at all, yet have some sort of signposts showing a direction or two that can be taken. All of this though, this is all in invitation. And it’s up to us how, when or if we ever choose to wander in wonder through these openings.

There are so many who write and speak of what they feel they ‘know’ and with an energy of ‘this IS THE truth’ and ‘if you don’t believe this, you are doomed’ or worse yet, ‘you are one of THEM…’. It’s not the information or download itself that is in question, for we are all given data to digest one way or another, yet it is the charge with which we offer each other our insights and downloads that bears some transmuting from within.

I checked in with myself about this in meditation this morning. I checked with the Divine Mother too, my beloved guide and source of undying, absolutely infinite love and holding of my worth. She offered this piece about everything always being an invitation, for nothing can be forced. We cannot force each other to follow along with what we’re feeling and being, we can only invite and let go. We can only go inward if we feel something other than invitational energy coming from us towards others. This has been a big part of my personal process over the last several years, and I think for most if not all healers, this is a deep and necessary place to go. We are all gifted, so much so, and have such amazing abilities to tap into and share much that is based on what we are feeling, being downloaded, and above all, experiencing. To really take a sober look at where we are coming from when we do all of this, takes courage, a great deal of self-love, and a desire to deeply and truly love all of humanity.

“It can only ever be an invitation”… I feel these words ring so true and warm inside of me. I feel the freedom they offer, that She offers, from feeling confined to the knowingness of others. I feel the permission to lean into those teachings I feel are resonant, which for me means more and more that these teachings must come from a source that has done much inner work in order to truly and deeply ring true inside of me, and, I feel how this permission is really about an invitation to lean into myself, to feel more trust in my own ‘sources’ of information inside of myself, that are always available if I ask and intend to hear and feel them.

May all of this go into you and your own parts as an invitation, not a mandate. Wow, so this is basically an invitation into an invitation… that feels enlivening! ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.